The Book of Humorous Verse

About this eBook

Editor

Wells, Carolyn, 1862-1942

Credits

E-text prepared by Hilary Caws-Elwitt, Huub Bakker, and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team

Language

English

LoC Class

PN: Language and Literatures: Literature: General, Criticism, Collections

Subject

Humorous poetry, American

Category

Text

eBook-No.

23972

Project Gutenberg

https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/23972

Release Date

December 22, 2007

Copyright

Public domain in the USA.

Contents

1. 1.THE BOOK OF HUMOROUS VERSE
2. 2.INTRODUCTION
3. 3.ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
4. 4.CONTENTS
5. 5.THE BOOK OF HUMOROUS VERSE
6. 6.BANTER — THE PLAYED-OUT HUMOURIST — THE PRACTICAL JOKER — TO PHŒBE — MALBROUCK — MARK TWAIN: A PIPE DREAM — FROM A FULL HEART — THE ULTIMATE JOY — OLD FASHIONED FUN — WHEN MOONLIKE ORE THE HAZURE SEAS — WHEN THE FROST IS ON THE PUNKIN — TWO MEN — A FAMILIAR LETTER TO SEVERAL CORRESPONDENTS — THE HEIGHT OF THE RIDICULOUS — SHAKE, MULLEARY AND GO-ETHE — A RONDELAY — WINTER DUSK — COMIC MISERIES — EARLY RISING — TO THE PLIOCENE SKULL — ODE TO WORK IN SPRINGTIME — OLD STUFF — TO MINERVA — THE LEGEND OF HEINZ VON STEIN — THE TRUTH ABOUT HORACE — PROPINQUITY NEEDED — IN THE CATACOMBS — OUR NATIVE BIRDS — THE PRAYER OF CYRUS BROWN — ERRING IN COMPANY — CUPID — IF WE DIDN'T HAVE TO EAT — TO MY EMPTY PURSE — THE BIRTH OF SAINT PATRICK — HER LITTLE FEET — SCHOOL — THE MILLENNIUM — TO R. K. — "EXACTLY SO" — COMPANIONS — A TALE OF A GRANDFATHER — THE SCHOOLMASTER — ABROAD WITH HIS SON — A APPEAL FOR ARE TO THE SEXTANT OF THE OLD BRICK MEETINOUSE — BY A GASPER — CUPID'S DARTS — WHICH ARE A GROWING MENACE TO THE PUBLIC — A PLEA FOR TRIGAMY — THE POPE — ALL AT SEA — THE VOYAGE OF A CERTAIN UNCERTAIN SAILORMAN — BALLAD OF THE PRIMITIVE JEST — VILLANELLE OF THINGS AMUSING — HOW TO EAT WATERMELONS — A VAGUE STORY — HIS MOTHER-IN-LAW — ON A DEAF HOUSEKEEPER — HOMŒOPATHIC SOUP — SOME LITTLE BUG — ON THE DOWNTOWN SIDE OF AN UPTOWN STREET — WRITTEN AFTER SWIMMING FROM SESTOS TO ABYDOS — THE FISHERMAN'S CHANT — REPORT OF AN ADJUDGED CASE — NOT TO BE FOUND IN ANY OF THE BOOKS — PREHISTORIC SMITH — QUATERNARY EPOCH—POST-PLIOCENE PERIOD — SONG — OF ONE ELEVEN YEARS IN PRISON — LYING — STRICTLY GERM-PROOF — THE LAY OF THE LOVER'S FRIEND — MAN'S PLACE IN NATURE — DEDICATED TO DARWIN AND HUXLEY — THE NEW VERSION — AMAZING FACTS ABOUT FOOD — TRANSCENDENTALISM — A "CAUDAL" LECTURE — SALAD — NEMESIS — "MONA LISA" — THE SIEGE OF DJKLXPRWBZ — RURAL BLISS — AN OLD BACHELOR — SONG — THE QUEST OF THE PURPLE COW — ST. PATRICK OF IRELAND, MY DEAR! — THE IRISH SCHOOLMASTER — REFLECTIONS ON CLEOPATHERA'S NEEDLE — THE ORIGIN OF IRELAND — AS TO THE WEATHER — THE TWINS
7. 7.THE ETERNAL FEMININE — HE AND SHE — THE KISS — THE COURTIN' — HIRAM HOVER — A BALLAD OF NEW ENGLAND LIFE — BLOW ME EYES! — FIRST LOVE — WHAT IS A WOMAN LIKE? — MIS' SMITH — TRIOLET — BESSIE BROWN, M.D. — A SKETCH FROM THE LIFE — MINGUILLO'S KISS — A KISS IN THE RAIN — THE LOVE-KNOT — OVER THE WAY — CHORUS OF WOMEN — FROM THE "THESMOPHORIAZUSÆ." — THE WIDOW MALONE — THE SMACK IN SCHOOL — 'SPÄCIALLY JIM — KITTY OF COLERAINE — WHY DON'T THE MEN PROPOSE? — A PIN — THE WHISTLER — THE CLOUD — AN IDYLL OF THE WESTERN FRONT — CONSTANCY — AIN'T IT AWFUL, MABEL? — WING TEE WEE — PHYLLIS LEE — THE SORROWS OF WERTHER — THE UNATTAINABLE — RORY O'MORE; OR, GOOD OMENS — A DIALOGUE FROM PLATO — DORA VERSUS ROSE — TU QUOQUE — AN IDYLL IN THE CONSERVATORY — NOTHING TO WEAR — MY MISTRESS'S BOOTS — MRS. SMITH — A TERRIBLE INFANT — SUSAN — A KIND PROVIDENCE — "I DIDN'T LIKE HIM" — MY ANGELINE — NORA'S VOW — HUSBAND AND HEATHEN — THE LOST PLEIAD — THE NEW CHURCH ORGAN — LARRIE O'DEE — NO FAULT IN WOMEN — A COSMOPOLITAN WOMAN — COURTING IN KENTUCKY — ANY ONE WILL DO — A BIRD IN THE HAND — THE BELLE OF THE BALL — THE RETORT — BEHAVE YOURSEL' BEFORE FOLK — THE CHRONICLE: A BALLAD — BUXOM JOAN — OH, MY GERALDINE — THE PARTERRE — HOW TO ASK AND HAVE — SALLY IN OUR ALLEY — FALSE LOVE AND TRUE LOGIC — PET'S PUNISHMENT — AD CHLOEN, M.A. — FRESH FROM HER CAMBRIDGE EXAMINATION — CHLOE, M.A. — AD AMANTEM SUAM — THE FAIR MILLINGER — By the Watertown Horse-Car Conductor — TWO FISHERS — MAUD — ARE WOMEN FAIR? — THE PLAIDIE — FEMININE ARITHMETIC — LORD GUY — SARY "FIXES UP" THINGS — THE CONSTANT CANNIBAL MAIDEN — WIDOW BEDOTT TO ELDER SNIFFLES — UNDER THE MISTLETOE — THE BROKEN PITCHER — GIFTS RETURNED
8. 8.LOVE AND COURTSHIP — NOUREDDIN, THE SON OF THE SHAH — THE USUAL WAY — THE WAY TO ARCADY — MY LOVE AND MY HEART — QUITE BY CHANCE — THE NUN — SUGGESTED BY PART OF THE ITALIAN SONG, BEGINNING "SE MONECA TI FAI." — THE CHEMIST TO HIS LOVE — CATEGORICAL COURTSHIP — LANTY LEARY — THE SECRET COMBINATION — FORTY YEARS AFTER — CUPID — PARING-TIME ANTICIPATED — WHY — THE SABINE FARMER'S SERENADE — I HAE LAID A HERRING IN SAUT — THE CLOWN'S COURTSHIP — OUT UPON IT — LOVE IS LIKE A DIZZINESS — THE KITCHEN CLOCK — LADY MINE — BALLADE OF THE GOLFER IN LOVE — BALLADE OF FORGOTTEN LOVES
9. 9.SATIRE — A BALLADE OF SUICIDE — FINNIGIN TO FLANNIGAN — STUDY OF AN ELEVATION, IN INDIAN INK — THE V-A-S-E — MINIVER CHEEVY — THE RECRUIT — OFFICER BRADY — THE MODERN RECRUIT — POST-IMPRESSIONISM — TO THE PORTRAIT OF "A GENTLEMAN," — IN THE ATHENÆUM GALLERY — CACOËTHES SCRIBENDI — CONTENTMENT — "MAN WANTS BUT LITTLE HERE BELOW" — A BOSTON LULLABY — A GRAIN OF SALT — SONG — A PHILOSOPHER — THE MEETING OF THE CLABBERHUSES — THE IDEAL HUSBAND TO HIS WIFE — DISTICHS — THE HEN-ROOST MAN — IF THEY MEANT ALL THEY SAID — THE MAN — A THOUGHT — THE MUSICAL ASS — THE KNIFE-GRINDER — ST. ANTHONY'S SERMON TO THE FISHES — THE BATTLE OF BLENHEIM — THE THREE BLACK CROWS — TO THE TERRESTRIAL GLOBE — BY A MISERABLE WRETCH — ETIQUETTE — A MODEST WIT — THE LATEST DECALOGUE — A SIMILE — BY PARCELS POST — A DOMESTIC IDYLL — ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL — THE CONTRAST — THE DEVONSHIRE LANE — A SPLENDID FELLOW — IF — ACCEPTED AND WILL APPEAR — THE LITTLE VAGABOND — SYMPATHY — THE RELIGION OF HUDIBRAS — HOLY WILLIE'S PRAYER — THE LEARNED NEGRO — TRUE TO POLL — TRUST IN WOMEN — THE LITERARY LADY — TWELVE ARTICLES — ALL-SAINTS — HOW TO MAKE A MAN OF CONSEQUENCE — ON A MAGAZINE SONNET — PARADISE — A HINDOO LEGEND — THE FRIAR OF ORDERS GRAY — OF A CERTAIN MAN — CLEAN CLARA — CHRISTMAS CHIMES — THE RULING PASSION — From "Moral Essays," Epistle I — THE POPE AND THE NET — AN ACTOR — THE LOST SPECTACLES — THAT TEXAN CATTLE MAN — FABLE — HOCH! DER KAISER — WHAT MR. ROBINSON THINKS — THE CANDIDATE'S CREED — BIGLOW PAPERS — THE RAZOR SELLER — THE DEVIL'S WALK ON EARTH — FATHER MOLLOY — OR, THE CONFESSION — THE OWL-CRITIC — WHAT WILL WE DO? — LIFE IN LACONICS — ON KNOWING WHEN TO STOP — REV. GABE TUCKER'S REMARKS — THURSDAY — SKY-MAKING — TO PROFESSOR TYNDALL — THE POSITIVISTS — MARTIAL IN LONDON — THE SPLENDID SHILLING — AFTER HORACE — OF A PRECISE TAILOR — MONEY — BOSTON NURSERY RHYMES — KENTUCKY PHILOSOPHY — JOHN GRUMLIE — A SONG OF IMPOSSIBILITIES — SONG — THE OUBIT — DOUBLE BALLADE OF PRIMITIVE MAN — PHILLIS'S AGE
10. 10.CYNICISM — GOOD AND BAD LUCK — BANGKOLIDYE — PENSÉES DE NOËL — A BALLADE OF AN ANTI-PURITAN — PESSIMISM — CYNICAL ODE TO AN ULTRA-CYNICAL PUBLIC — YOUTH AND ART — THE BACHELOR'S DREAM — ALL THINGS EXCEPT MYSELF I KNOW — THE JOYS OF MARRIAGE — THE THIRD PROPOSITION — THE BALLAD OF CASSANDRA BROWN — WHAT'S IN A NAME? — TOO LATE — THE ANNUITY — K. K.—CAN'T CALCULATE — NORTHERN FARMER — NEW STYLE — FIN DE SIÉCLE — THEN AG'IN — THE PESSIMIST — WITHOUT AND WITHIN — SAME OLD STORY
11. 11.EPIGRAMS — WOMAN'S WILL — CYNICUS TO W. SHAKESPEARE — SENEX TO MATT. PRIOR — TO A BLOCKHEAD — THE FOOL AND THE POET — A RHYMESTER — GILES'S HOPE — COLOGNE — AN ETERNAL POEM — ON A BAD SINGER — JOB — REASONS FOR DRINKING — SMATTERERS — HYPOCRISY — TO DOCTOR EMPIRIC — A REMEDY WORSE THAN THE DISEASE — A WIFE — THE HONEY-MOON — DIDO — IMPROMPTU EPIGRAM ON THE LATIN GERUNDS — AN EPITAPH — ON TAKING A WIFE — UPON BEING OBLIGED TO LEAVE A PLEASANT PARTY FROM THE WANT OF A PAIR OF BREECHES TO DRESS FOR DINNER IN — SOME LADIES — ON A SENSE OF HUMOUR — ON HEARING A LADY PRAISE A CERTAIN REV. DOCTOR'S EYES — EPITAPH INTENDED FOR HIS WIFE — TO A CAPRICIOUS FRIEND — IMITATED FROM MARTIAL — WHICH IS WHICH — ON A FULL-LENGTH PORTRAIT OF BEAU MARSH PLACED BETWEEN THE BUSTS OF NEWTON AND POPE — ON SCOTLAND — MENDAX — TO A SLOW WALKER AND QUICK EATER — WHAT'S MY THOUGHT LIKE? — OF ALL THE MEN — ON BUTLER'S MONUMENT — A CONJUGAL CONUNDRUM
12. 12.BURLESQUE — LOVERS AND A REFLECTION — OUR HYMN — "SOLDIER, REST!" — IMITATION — THE MIGHTY MUST — MIDSUMMER MADNESS — A SOLILOQUY — MAVRONE — ONE OF THOSE SAD IRISH POEMS, WITH NOTES — LILIES — FOR I AM SAD — A LITTLE SWIRL OF VERS LIBRE — NOT COVERED, STRANGE TO SAY, BY THE PENAL CODE — YOUNG LOCHINVAR — THE TRUE STORY IN BLANK VERSE — IMAGISTE LOVE LINES — BYGONES — JUSTICE TO SCOTLAND — AN UNPUBLISHED POEM BY BURNS — LAMENT OF THE SCOTCH-IRISH EXILE — A SONG OF SORROW — A LULLABYLET FOR A MAGAZINELET — THE REJECTED "NATIONAL HYMNS" — THE EDITOR'S WOOING — THE BABY'S DÉBUT [1] — A BURLESQUE IMITATION OF WORDSWORTH—REJECTED ADDRESSES — THE CANTELOPE — POPULAR BALLAD: "NEVER FORGET YOUR PARENTS" — HOW A GIRL WAS TOO RECKLESS OF GRAMMAR — BEHOLD THE DEEDS! — CHANT ROYAL — VILLON'S STRAIGHT TIP TO ALL CROSS COVES — CULTURE IN THE SLUMS — THE LAWYER'S INVOCATION TO SPRING — NORTH, EAST, SOUTH, AND WEST — AFTER R. K. — MARTIN LUTHER AT POTSDAM — AN IDYLL OF PHATTE AND LEENE — THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT — PALABRAS GRANDIOSAS — AFTER T—— B—— A—— — A LOVE PLAYNT—1370 — DARWINITY — SELECT PASSAGES FROM A COMING PORT — THE ROMAUNT OF HUMPTY DUMPTY — THE WEDDING — IN MEMORIAM TECHNICAM — "SONGS WITHOUT WORDS" — AT THE SIGN OF THE COCK — FRENCH STYLE, 1898 — PRESTO FURIOSO — AFTER WALT WHITMAN — TO JULIA IN SHOOTING TOGS AND A HERRICKOSE VEIN — FAREWELL — PROVOKED BY CALVERLEY'S "FOREVER" — HERE IS THE TALE — AFTER RUDYARD KIPLING — THE WILLOWS — A BALLAD — IN THE MANNER OF R-DY-RD K-PL-NG — THE TRANSLATED WAY — COMMONPLACES — ANGELO ORDERS HIS DINNER — THE PROMISSORY NOTE — CAMERADOS — THE LAST RIDE TOGETHER — FROM HER POINT OF VIEW — IMITATION OF WALT WHITMAN — SALAD — IF — THE JABBERWOCKY OF AUTHORS — THE TOWN OF NICE — MAY, 1874 — THE WILLOW-TREE — ANOTHER VERSION — A BALLADE OF BALLADE-MONGERS — AFTER THE MANNER OF MASTER FRANÇOIS VILLON OF PARIS
13. 13.BATHOS — THE CONFESSION — IF YOU HAVE SEEN — CIRCUMSTANCE — THE ORANGE — ELEGY — OUR TRAVELLER — OPTIMISM — THE DECLARATION — HE CAME TO PAY — THE FORLORN ONE — RURAL RAPTURES — A FRAGMENT — THE BITER BIT — COMFORT IN AFFLICTION — THE HUSBAND'S PETITION — LINES WRITTEN AFTER A BATTLE — BY AN ASSISTANT SURGEON OF THE NINETEENTH NANKEENS — LINES — ADDRESSED TO ** **** ***** ON THE 29TH OF SEPTEMBER, WHEN WE PARTED FOR THE LAST TIME — THE IMAGINATIVE CRISIS
14. 14.PARODY — THE HIGHER PANTHEISM IN A NUTSHELL — NEPHELIDIA — UP THE SPOUT — IN IMMEMORIAM — LUCY LAKE — THE COCK AND THE BULL — BALLAD — DISASTER — WORDSWORTHIAN REMINISCENCE — INSPECT US — THE MESSED DAMOZEL — AT THE CUBIST EXHIBITION — A MELTON MOWBRAY PORK-PIE — ISRAFIDDLESTRINGS — AFTER DILETTANTE CONCETTI — WHENCENESS OF THE WHICH — SOME DISTANCE AFTER TENNYSON — THE LITTLE STAR — THE ORIGINAL LAMB — SAINTE MARGÉRIE — ROBERT FROST — RELATES THE DEATH OF THE TIRED MAN — OWEN SEAMAN — ESTABLISHES THE "ENTENTE CORDIALE" BY RECITING "THE SINGULAR STUPIDITY OF J. SPRATT, ESQ.," IN THE MANNER OF GUY WETMORE CARRYL. — THE MODERN HIAWATHA — SOMEWHERE-IN-EUROPE-WOCKY — RIGID BODY SINGS — A BALLAD OF HIGH ENDEAVOR — FATHER WILLIAM — THE POETS AT TEA — HOW OFTEN — IF I SHOULD DIE TO-NIGHT — "THE DAY IS DONE" — JACOB — BALLAD OF THE CANAL — THERE'S A BOWER OF BEAN-VINES — REUBEN — THE WIFE — WHEN LOVELY WOMAN — JOHN THOMPSON'S DAUGHTER — A PORTRAIT — ANNABEL LEE — HOME SWEET HOME WITH VARIATIONS — AN OLD SONG BY NEW SINGERS — IN THE ORIGINAL — MORE IMPRESSIONS — LA FUITE DES OIES — NURSERY RHYMES À LA MODE — A MAUDLE-IN BALLAD — TO HIS LILY — GILLIAN — EXTRACTS FKOM THE RUBAIYAT OF OMAR CAYENNE — DIVERSIONS OF THE RE-ECHO CLUB — STYX RIVER ANTHOLOGY — ANSWER TO MASTER WITHER'S SONG, "SHALL I, WASTING IN DESPAIR?" — SONG OF THE SPRINGTIDE — THE VILLAGE CHOIR — MY FOE — NURSERY SONG IN PIDGIN ENGLISH — FATHER WILLIAM — A POE-'EM OF PASSION — HOW THE DAUGHTERS COME DOWN AT DUNOON — TO AN IMPORTUNATE HOST — DURING DINNER AND AFTER TENNYSON — CREMATION — BY A BURNING ADMIRER OF SIR HENRY THOMPSON — AN IMITATION OF WORDSWORTH — THE LAY OF THE LOVE-LORN — PARODY ON TENNYSON'S "LOCKSLEY HALL" — ONLY SEVEN — A PASTORAL STORY AFTER WORDSWORTH — 'TWAS EVER THUS — FOAM AND FANGS
15. 15.NARRATIVE — LITTLE BILLEE — THE CRYSTAL PALACE — THE WOFLE NEW BALLAD OF JANE RONEY AND MARY BROWN — KING JOHN AND THE ABBOT — ON THE DEATH OF A FAVORITE CAT, — DROWNED IN A TUB OF GOLDFISHES — MISADVENTURES AT MARGATE — A LEGEND OF JARVIS'S JETTY — THE GOUTY MERCHANT AND THE STRANGER — THE DIVERTING HISTORY OF JOHN GILPIN — SHOWING HOW HE WENT FARTHER THAN HE INTENDED AND CAME SAFE HOME AGAIN — PADDY O'RAFTHER — HERE SHE GOES, AND THERE SHE GOES — THE QUAKER'S MEETING — THE JESTER CONDEMNED TO DEATH — THE DEACON'S MASTERPIECE; — OR, THE WONDERFUL "ONE-HOSS SHAY" — THE BALLAD OF THE OYSTERMAN — THE WELL OF ST. KEYNE — THE JACKDAW OF RHEIMS — THE KNIGHT AND THE LADY — AN EASTERN QUESTION — MY AUNT'S SPECTRE — CASEY AT THE BAT — THE PIED PIPER OF HAMELIN — THE GOOSE — THE BALLAD OF CHARITY — THE POST CAPTAIN — ROBINSON CRUSOE'S STORY — BEN BLUFF — THE PILGRIMS AND THE PEAS — TAM O'SHANTER — THAT GENTLE MAN FROM BOSTON TOWN — AN IDYL OF OREGON — THE YARN OF THE "NANCY BELL" — FERDINANDO AND ELVIRA — OR, THE GENTLE PIEMAN — GENTLE ALICE BROWN — THE STORY OF PRINCE AGIB — SIR GUY THE CRUSADER — KITTY WANTS TO WRITE — DIGHTON IS ENGAGED! — PLAIN LANGUAGE FROM TRUTHFUL JAMES — TABLE MOUNTAIN, 1870 — THE SOCIETY UPON THE STANISLAUS — "JIM" — WILLIAM BROWN OF OREGON — LITTLE BREECHES — THE ENCHANTED SHIRT — JIM BLUDSO — WRECK OF THE "JULIE PLANTE" — THE ALARMED SKIPPER — "IT WAS AN ANCIENT MARINER" — THE ELDERLY GENTLEMAN — SAYING NOT MEANING — HANS BREITMANN'S PARTY — BALLAD BY HANS BREITMANN — GRAMPY SINGS A SONG — THE FIRST BANJO — THE ROMANCE OF THE CARPET — THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK — THE OLD MAN AND JIM — A SAILOR'S YARN — THE CONVERTED CANNIBALS — THE RETIRED PORK-BUTCHER AND THE SPOOK — SKIPPER IRESON'S RIDE — DARIUS GREEN AND HIS FLYING-MACHINE — A GREAT FIGHT — THE DONNYBROOK JIG — UNFORTUNATE MISS BAILEY — THE LAIRD O' COCKPEN — A WEDDING
16. 16.TRIBUTE — THE AHKOND OF SWAT — THE AHKOOND OF SWAT — DIRGE OF THE MOOLLA OF KOTAL, — RIVAL OF THE AKHOOND OF SWAT — THE BALLAD OF BOUILLABAISSE — OULD DOCTOR MACK — FATHER O'FLYNN — THE BALD-HEADED TYRANT — BARNEY McGEE — ADDRESS TO THE TOOTHACHE — A FAREWELL TO TOBACCO — JOHN BARLEYCORN — STANZAS TO PALE ALE — ODE TO TOBACCO — SONNET TO A CLAM — DUM TACENT CLAIMANT — TO A FLY — TAKEN OUT OF A BOWL Of PUNCH — ODE TO A BOBTAILED CAT — A DIRGE — CONCERNING THE LATE LAMENTED KING OF THE CANNIBAL ISLANDS
17. 17.WHIMSEY — AN ELEGY — ON THE GLORY OF HER SEX, MRS. MARY BLAIZE — PARSON GRAY — THE IRISHMAN AND THE LADY — THE CATARACT OF LODORE — LAY OF THE DESERTED INFLUENZAED — BELAGCHOLLY DAYS — RHYME OF THE RAIL — ECHO — SONG — A GENTLE ECHO ON WOMAN — IN THE DORIC MANNER — LAY OF ANCIENT ROME — A NEW SONG — OF NEW SIMILES — THE AMERICAN TRAVELLER — THE ZEALLESS XYLOGRAPHER — DEDICATED TO THE END OF THE DICTIONARY — THE OLD LINE FENCE — O-U-G-H — A FRESH HACK AT AN OLD KNOT — ENIGMA ON THE LETTER H — TRAVESTY OF MISS FANSHAWE'S ENIGMA — AN ELEGY ON THE DEATH OF A MAD DOG — AN EPITAPH — OLD GRIMES — THE ENDLESS SONG — THE HUNDRED BEST BOOKS — THE COSMIC EGG — FIVE WINES — A RHYME FOR MUSICIANS — MY MADELINE — SERENADE IN M FLAT — SUNG BY MAJOR MARMADUKE MUTTONHEAD TO MADEMOISELLE MADELINE MENDOZA — SUSAN SIMPSON — THE MARCH TO MOSCOW — HALF HOURS WITH THE CLASSICS — ON THE OXFORD CARRIER — NINETY-NINE IN THE SHADE — THE TRIOLET — THE RONDEAU — LIFE [1] — ODE TO THE HUMAN HEART — A STRIKE AMONG THE POETS — WHATEVER IS, IS RIGHT — NOTHING — DIRGE — O D V — CONTAINING A FULL, TRUE, AND PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF THE TERRIBLE FATE OF ABRAHAM ISAACS, OF IVY LANE — A MAN OF WORDS — SIMILES — NO! — FAITHLESS SALLY BROWN — TIM TURPIN — FAITHLESS NELLY GRAY — SALLY SIMPKIN'S LAMENT — DEATH'S RAMBLE — PANEGYRIC ON THE LADIES — READ ALTERNATE LINES — AMBIGUOUS LINES — READ WITH A COMMA AFTER THE FIRST NOUN IN EACH LINE — SURNAMES — A TERNARY OF LITTLES, UPON A PIPKIN OF JELLY SENT TO A LADY — A CARMAN'S ACCOUNT OF A LAW-SUIT — OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND — NONGTONGPAW — LOGICAL ENGLISH — LOGIC — THE CAREFUL PENMAN — QUESTIONS WITH ANSWERS — CONJUGAL CONJUGATIONS — LOVE'S MOODS AND SENSES — THE SIEGE OF BELGRADE — THE HAPPY MAN — THE BELLS — TAKINGS — A BACHELOR'S MONO-RHYME — THE ART OF BOOK-KEEPING — AN INVITATION TO THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS — BY A STUTTERING LOVER — A NOCTURNAL SKETCH — LOVELILTS — JOCOSA LYRA — TO A THESAURUS — THE FUTURE OF THE CLASSICS — CAUTIONARY VERSES — THE WAR: A-Z — LINES TO MISS FLORENCE HUNTINGDON — TO MY NOSE — A POLKA LYRIC — A CAT ALECTIC MONODY! — ODE FOR A SOCIAL MEETING — WITH SLIGHT ALTERATIONS BY A TEETOTALER [1] — THE JOVIAL PRIEST'S CONFESSION — TRANSLATED FROM THE LATIN OF WALTER DE MAPES, TIME OF HENRY II — LIMERICKS
18. 18.NONSENSE — LUNAR STANZAS — THE WHANGO TREE — THREE CHILDREN — 'TIS MIDNIGHT — COSSIMBAZAR — AN UNSUSPECTED FACT — THE CUMBERBUNCE — MR. FINNEY'S TURNIP — NONSENSE VERSES — LIKE TO THE THUNDERING TONE — ÆSTIVATION — UNCLE SIMON AND UNCLE JIM — A TRAGIC STORY — SONNET FOUND IN A DESERTED MAD HOUSE — THE JIM-JAM KING OF THE JOU-JOUS — AN ARABIAN LEGEND — TO MARIE — MY DREAM — THE ROLLICKING MASTODON — THE INVISIBLE BRIDGE — THE LAZY ROOF — MY FEET — SPIRK TROLL-DERISIVE — THE MAN IN THE MOON — THE LUGUBRIOUS WHING-WHANG — THE YONGHY-BONGHY-BO — THE JUMBLIES — THE POBBLE WHO HAS NO TOES — THE NEW VESTMENTS — THE TWO OLD BACHELORS — JABBERWOCKY — WAYS AND MEANS — HUMPTY DUMPTY'S RECITATION — SOME HALLUCINATIONS — SING FOR THE GARISH EYE — THE SHIPWRECK — UFFIA — 'TIS SWEET TO ROAM — THREE JOVIAL HUNTSMEN — KING ARTHUR — HYDER IDDLE — THE OCEAN WANDERER — SCIENTIFIC PROOF — THE THINGUMBOB — A PASTEL — WONDERS OF NATURE — LINES BY AN OLD FOGY — A COUNTRY SUMMER PASTORAL — TURVEY TOP — A BALLAD OF BEDLAM
19. 19.NATURAL HISTORY — THE FASTIDIOUS SERPENT — THE LEGEND OF THE FIRST CAM-U-EL — AN ARABIAN APOLOGUE — UNSATISFIED YEARNING — KINDLY ADVICE — KINDNESS TO ANIMALS — TO BE OR NOT TO BE — THE HEN — OF BAITING THE LION — THE FLAMINGO — WHY DOTH A PUSSY CAT? — THE WALRUS AND THE CARPENTER — NIRVANA — THE CATFISH — WAR RELIEF — THE OWL AND THE PUSSY-CAT — MEXICAN SERENADE — ORPHAN BORN — DIVIDED DESTINIES — THE VIPER — THE LLAMA — THE YAK — THE FROG — THE MICROBE — THE GREAT BLACK CROW — THE COLUBRIAD — THE RETIRED CAT — A DARWINIAN BALLAD — THE PIG — A COLLOQUIAL POEM — A FISH STORY — THE CAMERONIAN CAT — THE YOUNG GAZELLE — A MOORE-ISH TALE — THE BALLAD OF THE EMEU — THE TURTLE AND FLAMINGO
20. 20.JUNIORS — PRIOR TO MISS BELLE'S APPEARANCE — THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL — THE NAUGHTY DARKEY BOY — DUTCH LULLABY — THE DINKEY-BIRD — THE LITTLE PEACH — COUNSEL TO THOSE THAT EAT — HOME AND MOTHER — LITTLE ORPHANT ANNIE — A VISIT FROM ST. NICHOLAS — A NURSERY LEGEND — A LITTLE GOOSE — LEEDLE YAWCOB STRAUSS — A PARENTAL ODE TO MY SON, AGED THREE YEARS AND FIVE MONTHS — LITTLE MAMMA — THE COMICAL GIRL — BUNCHES OF GRAPES
21. 21.IMMORTAL STANZAS — THE PURPLE COW — THE YOUNG LADY OF NIGER — THE LAUGHING WILLOW — SAID OPIE READ — MANILA — ON THE ARISTOCRACY OF HARVARD — ON THE DEMOCRACY OF YALE — THE HERRING — IF THE MAN — THE KILKENNY CATS — POOR DEAR GRANDPAPA — MORE WALKS — INDIFFERENCE — MADAME SANS SOUCI — A RIDDLE — IF — THE END
22. 22.INDICES
23. 23.INDEX OF AUTHORS
24. 24.INDEX OF FIRST LINES
25. 25.INDEX OF TITLES — Transcriber's Notes

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