MAN OVERBOARD!
Yes—I have heard "Man overboard!" a good many times since I was a boy,
and once or twice I have seen the man go. There are more men lost in
that way than passengers on ocean steamers ever learn of. I have stood
looking over the rail on a dark night, when there was a step beside me,
and something flew past my head like a big black bat—and then there was
a splash! Stokers often go like that. They go mad with the heat, and
they slip up on deck and are gone before anybody can stop them, often
without being seen or heard. Now and then a passenger will do it, but he
generally has what he thinks a pretty good reason. I have seen a man
empty his revolver into a crowd of emigrants forward, and then go over
like a rocket. Of course, any officer who respects himself will do what
he can to pick a man up, if the weather is not so heavy that he would
have to risk his ship; but I don't think I remember seeing a man come
back when he was once fairly gone more than two or three times in all my
life, though we have often picked up the life-buoy, and sometimes the
fellow's cap. Stokers and passengers jump over; I never knew a sailor to
do that, drunk or sober. Yes, they say it has happened on hard ships,
but I never knew a case myself. Once in a long time a man is fished out
when it is just too late, and dies in the boat before you can get him
aboard, and—well, I don't know that I ever told that story since it
happened—I knew a fellow who went over, and came back dead. I didn't
see him after he came back; only one of us did, but we all knew he was
there.
No, I am not giving you "sharks." There isn't a shark in this story, and
I don't know that I would tell it at all if we weren't alone, just you
and I. But you and I have seen things in various parts, and maybe you
will understand. Anyhow, you know that I am telling what I know about,
and nothing else; and it has been on my mind to tell you ever since it
happened, only there hasn't been a chance.
It's a long story, and it took some time to happen; and it began a good
many years ago, in October, as well as I can remember. I was mate then;
I passed the local Marine Board for master about three years later. She
was the Helen B. Jackson, of New York, with lumber for the West
Indies, four-masted schooner, Captain Hackstaff. She was an
old-fashioned one, even then—no steam donkey, and all to do by hand.
There were still sailors in the coasting trade in those days, you
remember. She wasn't a hard ship, for the Old Man was better than most
of them, though he kept to himself and had a face like a monkey-wrench.
We were thirteen, all told, in the ship's company; and some of them
afterwards thought that might have had something to do with it, but I
had all that nonsense knocked out of me when I was a boy. I don't mean
to say that I like to go to sea on a Friday, but I have gone to sea on
a Friday, and nothing has happened; and twice before that we have been
thirteen, because one of the hands didn't turn up at the last minute,
and nothing ever happened either—nothing worse than the loss of a light
spar or two, or a little canvas. Whenever I have been wrecked, we had
sailed as cheerily as you please—no thirteens, no Fridays, no dead men
in the hold. I believe it generally happens that way.
I daresay you remember those two Benton boys that were so much alike? It
is no wonder, for they were twin brothers. They shipped with us as boys
on the old Boston Belle, when you were mate and I was before the mast.
I never was quite sure which was which of those two, even then; and when
they both had beards it was harder than ever to tell them apart. One was
Jim, and the other was Jack; James Benton and John Benton. The only
difference I ever could see was, that one seemed to be rather more
cheerful and inclined to talk than the other; but one couldn't even be
sure of that. Perhaps they had moods. Anyhow, there was one of them that
used to whistle when he was alone. He only knew one tune, and that was
"Nancy Lee," and the other didn't know any tune at all; but I may be
mistaken about that, too. Perhaps they both knew it.
Well, those two Benton boys turned up on board the Helen B. Jackson.
They had been on half a dozen ships since the Boston Belle, and they
had grown up and were good seamen. They had reddish beards and bright
blue eyes and freckled faces; and they were quiet fellows, good workmen
on rigging, pretty willing, and both good men at the wheel. They managed
to be in the same watch—it was the port watch on the Helen B., and
that was mine, and I had great confidence in them both. If there was any
job aloft that needed two hands, they were always the first to jump into
the rigging; but that doesn't often happen on a fore-and-aft schooner.
If it breezed up, and the jibtopsail was to be taken in, they never
minded a wetting, and they would be out at the bowsprit end before there
was a hand at the downhaul. The men liked them for that, and because
they didn't blow about what they could do. I remember one day in a
reefing job, the downhaul parted and came down on deck from the peak of
the spanker. When the weather moderated, and we shook the reefs out, the
downhaul was forgotten until we happened to think we might soon need it
again. There was some sea on, and the boom was off, and the gaff was
slamming. One of those Benton boys was at the wheel, and before I knew
what he was doing, the other was out on the gaff with the end of the new
downhaul, trying to reeve it through its block. The one who was steering
watched him, and got as white as cheese. The other one was swinging
about on the gaff end, and every time she rolled to leeward, he brought
up with a jerk that would have sent anything but a monkey flying into
space. But he didn't leave it until he had rove the new rope, and he got
back all right. I think it was Jack at the wheel; the one that seemed
more cheerful, the one that whistled "Nancy Lee." He had rather have
been doing the job himself than watch his brother do it, and he had a
scared look; but he kept her as steady as he could in the swell, and he
drew a long breath when Jim had worked his way back to the peak-halliard
block, and had something to hold on to. I think it was Jim.
They had good togs, too, and they were neat and clean men in the
forecastle. I knew they had nobody belonging to them ashore—no mother,
no sisters, and no wives; but somehow they both looked as if a woman
overhauled them now and then. I remember that they had one ditty bag
between them, and they had a woman's thimble in it. One of the men said
something about it to them, and they looked at each other; and one
smiled, but the other didn't. Most of their clothes were alike, but they
had one red guernsey between them. For some time I used to think it was
always the same one that wore it, and I thought that might be a way to
tell them apart. But then I heard one asking the other for it, and
saying that the other had worn it last. So that was no sign either. The
cook was a West Indiaman, called James Lawley; his father had been
hanged for putting lights in cocoanut trees where they didn't belong.
But he was a good cook, and knew his business; and it wasn't
soup-and-bully and dog's-body every Sunday. That's what I meant to say.
On Sunday the cook called both those boys Jim, and on weekdays he called
them Jack. He used to say he must be right sometimes if he did that,
because even the hands on a painted clock point right twice a day.
What started me to trying for some way of telling the Bentons apart was
this. I heard them talking about a girl. It was at night, in our watch,
and the wind had headed us off a little rather suddenly, and when we had
flattened in the jibs, we clewed down the topsails, while the two Benton
boys got the spanker sheet aft. One of them was at the helm. I coiled
down the mizzen-topsail downhaul myself, and was going aft to see how
she headed up, when I stopped to look at a light, and leaned against the
deck-house. While I was standing there, I heard the two boys talking. It
sounded as if they had talked of the same thing before, and, as far as I
could tell, the voice I heard first belonged to the one who wasn't quite
so cheerful as the other—the one who was Jim when one knew which he
was.
"Does Mamie know?" Jim asked.
"Not yet," Jack answered quietly. He was at the wheel. "I mean to tell
her next time we get home."
"All right."
That was all I heard, because I didn't care to stand there listening
while they were talking about their own affairs; so I went aft to look
into the binnacle, and I told the one at the wheel to keep her so as
long as she had way on her, for I thought the wind would back up again
before long, and there was land to leeward. When he answered, his voice,
somehow, didn't sound like the cheerful one. Perhaps his brother had
relieved the wheel while they had been speaking, but what I had heard
set me wondering which of them it was that had a girl at home. There's
lots of time for wondering on a schooner in fair weather.
After that I thought I noticed that the two brothers were more silent
when they were together. Perhaps they guessed that I had overheard
something that night, and kept quiet when I was about. Some men would
have amused themselves by trying to chaff them separately about the girl
at home, and I suppose whichever one it was would have let the cat out
of the bag if I had done that. But, somehow, I didn't like to. Yes, I
was thinking of getting married myself at that time, so I had a sort of
fellow-feeling for whichever one it was, that made me not want to chaff
him.
They didn't talk much, it seemed to me; but in fair weather, when there
was nothing to do at night, and one was steering, the other was
everlastingly hanging round as if he were waiting to relieve the wheel,
though he might have been enjoying a quiet nap for all I cared in such
weather. Or else, when one was taking his turn at the lookout, the other
would be sitting on an anchor beside him. One kept near the other, at
night more than in the daytime. I noticed that. They were fond of
sitting on that anchor, and they generally tucked away their pipes under
it, for the Helen B. was a dry boat in most weather, and like most
fore-and-afters was better on a wind than going free. With a beam sea we
sometimes shipped a little water aft. We were by the stern, anyhow, on
that voyage, and that is one reason why we lost the man.
We fell in with a southerly gale, southeast at first; and then the
barometer began to fall while you could watch it, and a long swell began
to come up from the south'ard. A couple of months earlier we might have
been in for a cyclone, but it's "October all over" in those waters, as
you know better than I. It was just going to blow, and then it was to
rain, that was all; and we had plenty of time to make everything snug
before it breezed up much. It blew harder after sunset, and by the time
it was quite dark it was a full gale. We had shortened sail for it, but
as we were by the stern we were carrying the spanker close reefed
instead of the storm trysail. She steered better so, as long as we
didn't have to heave to. I had the first watch with the Benton boys, and
we had not been on deck an hour when a child might have seen that the
weather meant business.
The Old Man came up on deck and looked round, and in less than a minute
he told us to give her the trysail. That meant heaving to, and I was
glad of it; for though the Helen B. was a good vessel enough, she
wasn't a new ship by a long way, and it did her no good to drive her in
that weather. I asked whether I should call all hands, but just then the
cook came aft, and the Old Man said he thought we could manage the job
without waking the sleepers, and the trysail was handy on deck already,
for we hadn't been expecting anything better. We were all in oilskins,
of course, and the night was as black as a coal mine, with only a ray of
light from the slit in the binnacle shield, and you couldn't tell one
man from another except by his voice. The Old Man took the wheel; we got
the boom amidships, and he jammed her into the wind until she had hardly
any way. It was blowing now, and it was all that I and two others could
do to get in the slack of the downhaul, while the others lowered away at
the peak and throat, and we had our hands full to get a couple of turns
round the wet sail. It's all child's play on a fore-and-after compared
with reefing topsails in anything like weather, but the gear of a
schooner sometimes does unhandy things that you don't expect, and those
everlasting long halliards get foul of everything if they get adrift. I
remember thinking how unhandy that particular job was. Somebody
unhooked the throat-halliard block, and thought he had hooked it into
the head-cringle of the trysail, and sang out to hoist away, but he had
missed it in the dark, and the heavy block went flying into the lee
rigging, and nearly killed him when it swung back with the weather roll.
Then the Old Man got her up in the wind until the jib was shaking like
thunder; then he held her off, and she went off as soon as the headsails
filled, and he couldn't get her back again without the spanker. Then the
Helen B. did her favourite trick, and before we had time to say much,
we had a sea over the quarter and were up to our waists, with the
parrels of the trysail only half becketed round the mast, and the deck
so full of gear that you couldn't put your foot on a plank, and the
spanker beginning to get adrift again, being badly stopped, and the
general confusion and hell's delight that you can only have on a
fore-and-after when there's nothing really serious the matter. Of
course, I don't mean to say that the Old Man couldn't have steered his
trick as well as you or I or any other seaman; but I don't believe he
had ever been on board the Helen B. before, or had his hand on her
wheel till then; and he didn't know her ways. I don't mean to say that
what happened was his fault. I don't know whose fault it was. Perhaps
nobody was to blame. But I knew something happened somewhere on board
when we shipped that sea, and you'll never get it out of my head. I
hadn't any spare time myself, for I was becketing the rest of the
trysail to the mast. We were on the starboard tack, and the
throat-halliard came down to port as usual, and I suppose there were at
least three men at it, hoisting away, while I was at the beckets.
Now I am going to tell you something. You have known me, man and boy,
several voyages; and you are older than I am; and you have always been a
good friend to me. Now, do you think I am the sort of man to think I
hear things where there isn't anything to hear, or to think I see things
when there is nothing to see? No, you don't. Thank you. Well now, I had
passed the last becket, and I sang out to the men to sway away, and I
was standing on the jaws of the spanker-gaff, with my left hand on the
bolt-rope of the trysail, so that I could feel when it was board-taut,
and I wasn't thinking of anything except being glad the job was over,
and that we were going to heave her to. It was as black as a
coal-pocket, except that you could see the streaks on the seas as they
went by, and abaft the deck-house I could see the ray of light from the
binnacle on the captain's yellow oilskin as he stood at the wheel—or,
rather, I might have seen it if I had looked round at that minute. But
I didn't look round. I heard a man whistling. It was "Nancy Lee," and I
could have sworn that the man was right over my head in the crosstrees.
Only somehow I knew very well that if anybody could have been up there,
and could have whistled a tune, there were no living ears sharp enough
to hear it on deck then. I heard it distinctly, and at the same time I
heard the real whistling of the wind in the weather rigging, sharp and
clear as the steam-whistle on a Dago's peanut-cart in New York. That was
all right, that was as it should be; but the other wasn't right; and I
felt queer and stiff, as if I couldn't move, and my hair was curling
against the flannel lining of my sou'wester, and I thought somebody had
dropped a lump of ice down my back.
I said that the noise of the wind in the rigging was real, as if the
other wasn't, for I felt that it wasn't, though I heard it. But it was,
all the same; for the captain heard it, too. When I came to relieve the
wheel, while the men were clearing up decks, he was swearing. He was a
quiet man, and I hadn't heard him swear before, and I don't think I did
again, though several queer things happened after that. Perhaps he said
all he had to say then; I don't see how he could have said anything
more. I used to think nobody could swear like a Dane, except a
Neapolitan or a South American; but when I had heard the Old Man, I
changed my mind. There's nothing afloat or ashore that can beat one of
your quiet American skippers, if he gets off on that tack. I didn't need
to ask him what was the matter, for I knew he had heard "Nancy Lee," as
I had, only it affected us differently.
He did not give me the wheel, but told me to go forward and get the
second bonnet off the staysail, so as to keep her up better. As we
tailed on to the sheet when it was done, the man next me knocked his
sou'wester off against my shoulder, and his face came so close to me
that I could see it in the dark. It must have been very white for me to
see it, but I only thought of that afterwards. I don't see how any light
could have fallen upon it, but I knew it was one of the Benton boys. I
don't know what made me speak to him. "Hullo, Jim! Is that you?" I
asked. I don't know why I said Jim, rather than Jack.
"I am Jack," he answered.
We made all fast, and things were much quieter. "The Old Man heard you
whistling 'Nancy Lee,' just now," I said, "and he didn't like it."
It was as if there were a white light inside his face, and it was
ghastly. I know his teeth chattered. But he didn't say anything, and the
next minute he was somewhere in the dark trying to find his sou'wester
at the foot of the mast.
When all was quiet, and she was hove to, coming to and falling off her
four points as regularly as a pendulum, and the helm lashed a little to
the lee, the Old Man turned in again, and I managed to light a pipe in
the lee of the deck-house, for there was nothing more to be done till
the gale chose to moderate, and the ship was as easy as a baby in its
cradle. Of course the cook had gone below, as he might have done an hour
earlier; so there were supposed to be four of us in the watch. There was
a man at the lookout, and there was a hand by the wheel, though there
was no steering to be done, and I was having my pipe in the lee of the
deck-house, and the fourth man was somewhere about decks, probably
having a smoke, too. I thought some skippers I had sailed with would
have called the watch aft, and given them a drink after that job, but it
wasn't cold, and I guessed that our Old Man wouldn't be particularly
generous in that way. My hands and feet were red-hot, and it would be
time enough to get into dry clothes when it was my watch below; so I
stayed where I was, and smoked. But by and by, things being so quiet, I
began to wonder why nobody moved on deck; just that sort of restless
wanting to know where every man is that one sometimes feels in a gale of
wind on a dark night. So when I had finished my pipe, I began to move
about. I went aft, and there was a man leaning over the wheel, with his
legs apart and both hands hanging down in the light from the binnacle,
and his sou'wester over his eyes. Then I went forward, and there was a
man at the lookout, with his back against the foremast, getting what
shelter he could from the staysail. I knew by his small height that he
was not one of the Benton boys. Then I went round by the weather side,
and poked about in the dark, for I began to wonder where the other man
was. But I couldn't find him, though I searched the decks until I got
right aft again. It was certainly one of the Benton boys that was
missing, but it wasn't like either of them to go below to change his
clothes in such warm weather. The man at the wheel was the other, of
course. I spoke to him.
"Jim, what's become of your brother?"
"I am Jack, sir."
"Well, then, Jack, where's Jim? He's not on deck."
"I don't know, sir."
When I had come up to him he had stood up from force of instinct, and
had laid his hands on the spokes as if he were steering, though the
wheel was lashed; but he still bent his face down, and it was half
hidden by the edge of his sou'wester, while he seemed to be staring at
the compass. He spoke in a very low voice, but that was natural, for
the captain had left his door open when he turned in, as it was a warm
night in spite of the storm, and there was no fear of shipping any more
water now.
"What put it into your head to whistle like that, Jack? You've been at
sea long enough to know better."
He said something, but I couldn't hear the words; it sounded as if he
were denying the charge.
"Somebody whistled," I said.
He didn't answer, and then, I don't know why, perhaps because the Old
Man hadn't given us a drink, I cut half an inch off the plug of tobacco
I had in my oilskin pocket, and gave it to him. He knew my tobacco was
good, and he shoved it into his mouth with a word of thanks. I was on
the weather side of the wheel.
"Go forward and see if you can find Jim," I said.
He started a little, and then stepped back and passed behind me, and was
going along the weather side. Maybe his silence about the whistling had
irritated me, and his taking it for granted that because we were hove to
and it was a dark night, he might go forward any way he pleased. Anyhow,
I stopped him, though I spoke good-naturedly enough.
"Pass to leeward, Jack," I said.
He didn't answer, but crossed the deck between the binnacle and the
deck-house to the lee side. She was only falling off and coming to, and
riding the big seas as easily as possible, but the man was not steady on
his feet and reeled against the corner of the deck-house and then
against the lee rail. I was quite sure he couldn't have had anything to
drink, for neither of the brothers were the kind to hide rum from their
shipmates, if they had any, and the only spirits that were aboard were
locked up in the captain's cabin. I wondered whether he had been hit by
the throat-halliard block and was hurt.
I left the wheel and went after him, but when I got to the corner of the
deck-house I saw that he was on a full run forward, so I went back. I
watched the compass for a while, to see how far she went off, and she
must have come to again half a dozen times before I heard voices, more
than three or four, forward; and then I heard the little West Indies
cook's voice, high and shrill above the rest:
"Man overboard!"
There wasn't anything to be done, with the ship hove to and the wheel
lashed. If there was a man overboard, he must be in the water right
alongside. I couldn't imagine how it could have happened, but I ran
forward instinctively. I came upon the cook first, half dressed in his
shirt and trousers, just as he had tumbled out of his bunk. He was
jumping into the main rigging, evidently hoping to see the man, as if
any one could have seen anything on such a night, except the
foam-streaks on the black water, and now and then the curl of a breaking
sea as it went away to leeward. Several of the men were peering over the
rail into the dark. I caught the cook by the foot, and asked who was
gone.
"It's Jim Benton," he shouted down to me. "He's not aboard this ship!"
There was no doubt about that. Jim Benton was gone; and I knew in a
flash that he had been taken off by that sea when we were setting the
storm trysail. It was nearly half an hour since then; she had run like
wild for a few minutes until we got her hove to, and no swimmer that
ever swam could have lived as long as that in such a sea. The men knew
it as well as I, but still they stared into the foam as if they had any
chance of seeing the lost man. I let the cook get into the rigging and
joined the men, and asked if they had made a thorough search on board,
though I knew they had and that it could not take long, for he wasn't on
deck, and there was only the forecastle below.
"That sea took him over, sir, as sure as you're born," said one of the
men close beside me.
We had no boat that could have lived in that, sea, of course, and we all
knew it. I offered to put one over, and let her drift astern two or
three cables' lengths by a line, if the men thought they could haul me
aboard again; but none of them would listen to that, and I should
probably have been drowned if I had tried it, even with a life-belt; for
it was a breaking sea. Besides, they all knew as well as I did that the
man could not be right in our wake. I don't know why I spoke again.
"Jack Benton, are you there? Will you go if I will?"
"No, sir," answered a voice; and that was all.
By that time the Old Man was on deck, and I felt his hand on my shoulder
rather roughly, as if he meant to shake me.
"I'd reckoned you had more sense, Mr. Torkeldsen," he said. "God knows I
would risk my ship to look for him, if it were any use; but he must have
gone half an hour ago."
He was a quiet man, and the men knew he was right, and that they had
seen the last of Jim Benton when they were bending the trysail—if
anybody had seen him then. The captain went below again, and for some
time the men stood around Jack, quite near him, without saying
anything, as sailors do when they are sorry for a man and can't help
him; and then the watch below turned in again, and we were three on
deck.
Nobody can understand that there can be much consolation in a funeral,
unless he has felt that blank feeling there is when a man's gone
overboard whom everybody likes. I suppose landsmen think it would be
easier if they didn't have to bury their fathers and mothers and
friends; but it wouldn't be. Somehow the funeral keeps up the idea of
something beyond. You may believe in that something just the same; but a
man who has gone in the dark, between two seas, without a cry, seems
much more beyond reach than if he were still lying on his bed, and had
only just stopped breathing. Perhaps Jim Benton knew that, and wanted to
come back to us. I don't know, and I am only telling you what happened,
and you may think what you like.
Jack stuck by the wheel that night until the watch was over. I don't
know whether he slept afterwards, but when I came on deck four hours
later, there he was again, in his oilskins, with his sou'wester over his
eyes, staring into the binnacle. We saw that he would rather stand
there, and we left him alone. Perhaps it was some consolation to him to
get that ray of light when everything was so dark. It began to rain,
too, as it can when a southerly gale is going to break up, and we got
every bucket and tub on board, and set them under the booms to catch the
fresh water for washing our clothes. The rain made it very thick, and I
went and stood under the lee of the staysail, looking out. I could tell
that day was breaking, because the foam was whiter in the dark where the
seas crested, and little by little the black rain grew grey and steamy,
and I couldn't see the red glare of the port light on the water when she
went off and rolled to leeward. The gale had moderated considerably, and
in another hour we should be under way again. I was still standing there
when Jack Benton came forward. He stood still a few minutes near me. The
rain came down in a solid sheet, and I could see his wet beard and a
corner of his cheek, too, grey in the dawn. Then he stooped down and
began feeling under the anchor for his pipe. We had hardly shipped any
water forward, and I suppose he had some way of tucking the pipe in, so
that the rain hadn't floated it off. Presently he got on his legs again,
and I saw that he had two pipes in his hand. One of them had belonged to
his brother, and after looking at them a moment I suppose he recognized
his own, for he put it in his mouth, dripping with water. Then he looked
at the other fully a minute without moving. When he had made up his
mind, I suppose, he quietly chucked it over the lee rail, without even
looking round to see whether I was watching him. I thought it was a
pity, for it was a good wooden pipe, with a nickel ferrule, and somebody
would have been glad to have it. But I didn't like to make any remark,
for he had a right to do what he pleased with what had belonged to his
dead brother. He blew the water out of his own pipe, and dried it
against his jacket, putting his hand inside his oilskin; he filled it,
standing under the lee of the foremast, got a light after wasting two or
three matches, and turned the pipe upside down in his teeth, to keep the
rain out of the bowl. I don't know why I noticed everything he did, and
remember it now; but somehow I felt sorry for him, and I kept wondering
whether there was anything I could say that would make him feel better.
But I didn't think of anything, and as it was broad daylight I went aft
again, for I guessed that the Old Man would turn out before long and
order the spanker set and the helm up. But he didn't turn out before
seven bells, just as the clouds broke and showed blue sky to
leeward—"the Frenchman's barometer," you used to call it.
Some people don't seem to be so dead, when they are dead, as others are.
Jim Benton was like that. He had been on my watch, and I couldn't get
used to the idea that he wasn't about decks with me. I was always
expecting to see him, and his brother was so exactly like him that I
often felt as if I did see him and forgot he was dead, and made the
mistake of calling Jack by his name; though I tried not to, because I
knew it must hurt. If ever Jack had been the cheerful one of the two, as
I had always supposed he had been, he had changed very much, for he grew
to be more silent than Jim had ever been.
One fine afternoon I was sitting on the main-hatch, overhauling the
clockwork of the taffrail-log, which hadn't been registering very well
of late, and I had got the cook to bring me a coffee-cup to hold the
small screws as I took them out, and a saucer for the sperm oil I was
going to use. I noticed that he didn't go away, but hung round without
exactly watching what I was doing, as if he wanted to say something to
me. I thought if it were worth much, he would say it anyhow, so I didn't
ask him questions; and sure enough he began of his own accord before
long. There was nobody on deck but the man at the wheel, and the other
man away forward.
"Mr. Torkeldsen," the cook began, and then stopped.
I supposed he was going to ask me to let the watch break out a barrel
of flour, or some salt horse.
"Well, doctor?" I asked, as he didn't go on.
"Well, Mr. Torkeldsen," he answered, "I somehow want to ask you whether
you think I am giving satisfaction on this ship, or not?"
"So far as I know, you are, doctor. I haven't heard any complaints from
the forecastle, and the captain has said nothing, and I think you know
your business, and the cabin-boy is bursting out of his clothes. That
looks as if you are giving satisfaction. What makes you think you are
not?"
I am not good at giving you that West Indies talk, and shan't try; but
the doctor beat about the bush awhile, and then he told me he thought
the men were beginning to play tricks on him, and he didn't like it, and
thought he hadn't deserved it, and would like his discharge at our next
port. I told him he was a d——d fool, of course, to begin with; and
that men were more apt to try a joke with a chap they liked than with
anybody they wanted to get rid of; unless it was a bad joke, like
flooding his bunk, or filling his boots with tar. But it wasn't that
kind of practical joke. The doctor said that the men were trying to
frighten him, and he didn't like it, and that they put things in his
way that frightened him. So I told him he was a d——d fool to be
frightened, anyway, and I wanted to know what things they put in his
way. He gave me a queer answer. He said they were spoons and forks, and
odd plates, and a cup now and then, and such things.
I set down the taffrail-log on the bit of canvas I had put under it, and
looked at the doctor. He was uneasy, and his eyes had a sort of hunted
look, and his yellow face looked grey. He wasn't trying to make trouble.
He was in trouble. So I asked him questions.
He said he could count as well as anybody, and do sums without using his
fingers, but that when he couldn't count any other way, he did use his
fingers, and it always came out the same. He said that when he and the
cabin-boy cleared up after the men's meals there were more things to
wash than he had given out. There'd be a fork more, or there'd be a
spoon more, and sometimes there'd be a spoon and a fork, and there was
always a plate more. It wasn't that he complained of that. Before poor
Jim Benton was lost they had a man more to feed, and his gear to wash up
after meals, and that was in the contract, the doctor said. It would
have been if there were twenty in the ship's company; but he didn't
think it was right for the men to play tricks like that. He kept his
things in good order, and he counted them, and he was responsible for
them, and it wasn't right that the men should take more things than they
needed when his back was turned, and just soil them and mix them up with
their own, so as to make him think—
He stopped there, and looked at me, and I looked at him. I didn't know
what he thought, but I began to guess. I wasn't going to humour any such
nonsense as that, so I told him to speak to the men himself, and not
come bothering me about such things.
"Count the plates and forks and spoons before them when they sit down to
table, and tell them that's all they'll get; and when they have
finished, count the things again, and if the count isn't right, find out
who did it. You know it must be one of them. You're not a green hand;
you've been going to sea ten or eleven years, and don't want any lessons
about how to behave if the boys play a trick on you."
"If I could catch him," said the cook, "I'd have a knife into him before
he could say his prayers."
Those West India men are always talking about knives, especially when
they are badly frightened. I knew what he meant, and didn't ask him, but
went on cleaning the brass cog-wheels of the patent log, and oiling the
bearings with a feather. "Wouldn't it be better to wash it out with
boiling water, sir?" asked the cook in an insinuating tone. He knew that
he had made a fool of himself, and was anxious to make it right again.
I heard no more about the odd platter and gear for two or three days,
though I thought about his story a good deal. The doctor evidently
believed that Jim Benton had come back, though he didn't quite like to
say so. His story had sounded silly enough on a bright afternoon, in
fair weather, when the sun was on the water, and every rag was drawing
in the breeze, and the sea looked as pleasant and as harmless as a cat
that has just eaten a canary. But when it was toward the end of the
first watch, and the waning moon had not risen yet, and the water was
like still oil, and the jibs hung down flat and helpless like the wings
of a dead bird—it wasn't the same then. More than once I have started
then and looked round when a fish jumped, expecting to see a face
sticking out of the water with its eyes shut. I think we all felt
something like that at the time.
One afternoon we were putting a fresh service on the jib-sheet-pennant.
It wasn't my watch, but I was standing by, looking on. Just then Jack
Benton came up from below, and went to look for his pipe under the
anchor. His face was hard and drawn, and his eyes were cold like steel
balls. He hardly ever spoke now, but he did his duty as usual, and
nobody had to complain of him, though we were all beginning to wonder
how long his grief for his dead brother was going to last like that. I
watched him as he crouched down, and ran his hand into the hiding-place
for the pipe. When he stood up, he had two pipes in his hand.
Now, I remembered very well seeing him throw one of those pipes away,
early in the morning after the gale; and it came to me now, and I didn't
suppose he kept a stock of them under the anchor. I caught sight of his
face, and it was greenish white, like the foam on shallow water, and he
stood a long time looking at the two pipes. He wasn't looking to see
which was his, for I wasn't five yards from him as he stood, and one of
those pipes had been smoked that day, and was shiny where his hand had
rubbed it, and the bone mouthpiece was chafed white where his teeth had
bitten it. The other was water-logged. It was swelled and cracking with
wet, and it looked to me as if there were a little green weed on it.
Jack Benton turned his head rather stealthily as I looked away, and then
he hid the thing in his trousers pocket, and went aft on the lee side,
out of sight. The men had got the sheet-pennant on a stretch to serve
it, but I ducked under it and stood where I could see what Jack did,
just under the fore-staysail. He couldn't see me, and he was looking
about for something. His hand shook as he picked up a bit of half-bent
iron rod, about a foot long, that had been used for turning an eye-bolt,
and had been left on the main-hatch. His hand shook as he got a piece of
marline out of his pocket, and made the water-logged pipe fast to the
iron. He didn't mean it to get adrift either, for he took his turns
carefully, and hove them taut and then rode them, so that they couldn't
slip, and made the end fast with two half-hitches round the iron, and
hitched it back on itself. Then he tried it with his hands, and looked
up and down the deck furtively, and then quietly dropped the pipe and
iron over the rail, so that I didn't even hear the splash. If anybody
was playing tricks on board, they weren't meant for the cook.
I asked some questions about Jack Benton, and one of the men told me
that he was off his feed, and hardly ate anything, and swallowed all the
coffee he could lay his hands on, and had used up all his own tobacco
and had begun on what his brother had left.
"The doctor says it ain't so, sir," said the man, looking at me shyly,
as if he didn't expect to be believed; "the doctor says there's as much
eaten from breakfast to breakfast as there was before Jim fell
overboard, though there's a mouth less and another that eats nothing. I
says it's the cabin-boy that gets it. He's bu'sting."
I told him that if the cabin-boy ate more than his share, he must work
more than his share, so as to balance things. But the man laughed
queerly, and looked at me again.
"I only said that, sir, just like that. We all know it ain't so."
"Well, how is it?"
"How is it?" asked the man, half-angry all at once. "I don't know how it
is, but there's a hand on board that's getting his whack along with us
as regular as the bells."
"Does he use tobacco?" I asked, meaning to laugh it out of him, but as I
spoke, I remembered the water-logged pipe.
"I guess he's using his own still," the man answered, in a queer, low
voice. "Perhaps he'll take some one else's when his is all gone."
It was about nine o'clock in the morning, I remember, for just then the
captain called to me to stand by the chronometer while he took his fore
observation. Captain Hackstaff wasn't one of those old skippers who do
everything themselves with a pocket watch, and keep the key of the
chronometer in their waistcoat pocket, and won't tell the mate how far
the dead reckoning is out. He was rather the other way, and I was glad
of it, for he generally let me work the sights he took, and just ran
his eye over my figures afterwards. I am bound to say his eye was pretty
good, for he would pick out a mistake in a logarithm, or tell me that I
had worked the "Equation of Time" with the wrong sign, before it seemed
to me that he could have got as far as "half the sum, minus the
altitude." He was always right, too, and besides he knew a lot about
iron ships and local deviation, and adjusting the compass, and all that
sort of thing. I don't know how he came to be in command of a
fore-and-aft schooner. He never talked about himself, and maybe he had
just been mate on one of those big steel square-riggers, and something
had put him back. Perhaps he had been captain, and had got his ship
aground, through no particular fault of his, and had to begin over
again. Sometimes he talked just like you and me, and sometimes he would
speak more like books do, or some of those Boston people I have heard. I
don't know. We have all been shipmates now and then with men who have
seen better days. Perhaps he had been in the Navy, but what makes me
think he couldn't have been, was that he was a thorough good seaman, a
regular old windjammer, and understood sail, which those Navy chaps
rarely do. Why, you and I have sailed with men before the mast who had
their master's certificates in their pockets—English Board of Trade
certificates, too—who could work a double altitude if you would lend
them a sextant and give them a look at the chronometer, as well as many
a man who commands a big square-rigger. Navigation ain't everything, nor
seamanship either. You've got to have it in you, if you mean to get
there.
I don't know how our captain heard that there was trouble forward. The
cabin-boy may have told him, or the men may have talked outside his door
when they relieved the wheel at night. Anyhow, he got wind of it, and
when he had got his sight that morning, he had all hands aft, and gave
them a lecture. It was just the kind of talk you might have expected
from him. He said he hadn't any complaint to make, and that so far as he
knew everybody on board was doing his duty, and that he was given to
understand that the men got their whack, and were satisfied. He said his
ship was never a hard ship, and that he liked quiet, and that was the
reason he didn't mean to have any nonsense, and the men might just as
well understand that, too. We'd had a great misfortune, he said, and it
was nobody's fault. We had lost a man we all liked and respected, and he
felt that everybody in the ship ought to be sorry for the man's brother,
who was left behind, and that it was rotten lubberly childishness, and
unjust and unmanly and cowardly, to be playing schoolboy tricks with
forks and spoons and pipes, and that sort of gear. He said it had got to
stop right now, and that was all, and the men might go forward. And so
they did.
It got worse after that, and the men watched the cook, and the cook
watched the men, as if they were trying to catch each other; but I think
everybody felt that there was something else. One evening, at
supper-time, I was on deck, and Jack came aft to relieve the wheel while
the man who was steering got his supper. He hadn't got past the
main-hatch on the lee side, when I heard a man running in slippers that
slapped on the deck, and there was a sort of a yell and I saw the
coloured cook going for Jack, with a carving knife in his hand. I jumped
to get between them, and Jack turned round short, and put out his hand.
I was too far to reach them, and the cook jabbed out with his knife. But
the blade didn't get anywhere near Benton. The cook seemed to be jabbing
it into the air again and again, at least four feet short of the mark.
Then he dropped his right hand, and I saw the whites of his eyes in the
dusk, and he reeled up against the pin-rail, and caught hold of a
belaying-pin with his left. I had reached him by that time, and grabbed
hold of his knife-hand, and the other, too, for I thought he was going
to use the pin; but Jack Benton was standing staring stupidly at him, as
if he didn't understand. But instead, the cook was holding on because he
couldn't stand, and his teeth were chattering, and he let go of the
knife, and the point stuck into the deck.
"He's crazy!" said Jack Benton, and that was all he said; and he went
aft.
When he was gone, the cook began to come to, and he spoke quite low,
near my ear.
"There were two of them! So help me God, there were two of them!"
I don't know why I didn't take him by the collar, and give him a good
shaking; but I didn't. I just picked up the knife and gave it to him,
and told him to go back to his galley, and not to make a fool of
himself. You see, he hadn't struck at Jack, but at something he thought
he saw, and I knew what it was, and I felt that same thing, like a lump
of ice sliding down my back, that I felt that night when we were bending
the trysail.
When the men had seen him running aft, they jumped up after him, but
they held off when they saw that I had caught him. By and by, the man
who had spoken to me before told me what had happened. He was a stocky
little chap, with a red head.
"Well," he said, "there isn't much to tell. Jack Benton had been eating
his supper with the rest of us. He always sits at the after corner of
the table, on the port side. His brother used to sit at the end, next
him. The doctor gave him a thundering big piece of pie to finish up
with, and when he had finished he didn't stop for a smoke, but went off
quick to relieve the wheel. Just as he had gone, the doctor came in from
the galley, and when he saw Jack's empty plate he stood stock still
staring at it; and we all wondered what was the matter, till we looked
at the plate. There were two forks in it, sir, lying side by side. Then
the doctor grabbed his knife, and flew up through the hatch like a
rocket. The other fork was there all right, Mr. Torkeldsen, for we all
saw it and handled it; and we all had our own. That's all I know."
I didn't feel that I wanted to laugh when he told me that story; but I
hoped the Old Man wouldn't hear it, for I knew he wouldn't believe it,
and no captain that ever sailed likes to have stories like that going
round about his ship. It gives her a bad name. But that was all anybody
ever saw except the cook, and he isn't the first man who has thought he
saw things without having any drink in him. I think, if the doctor had
been weak in the head, as he was afterwards, he might have done
something foolish again, and there might have been serious trouble. But
he didn't. Only, two or three times, I saw him looking at Jack Benton in
a queer, scared way, and once I heard him talking to himself.
"There's two of them! So help me God, there's two of them!"
He didn't say anything more about asking for his discharge, but I knew
well enough that if he got ashore at the next port we should never see
him again, if he had to leave his kit behind him, and his money, too. He
was scared all through, for good and all; and he wouldn't be right again
till he got another ship. It's no use to talk to a man when he gets like
that, any more than it is to send a boy to the main truck when he has
lost his nerve.
Jack Benton never spoke of what happened that evening. I don't know
whether he knew about the two forks, or not; or whether he understood
what the trouble was. Whatever he knew from the other men, he was
evidently living under a hard strain. He was quiet enough, and too
quiet; but his face was set, and sometimes it twitched oddly when he was
at the wheel, and he would turn his head round sharp to look behind him.
A man doesn't do that naturally, unless there's a vessel that he thinks
is creeping up on the quarter. When that happens, if the man at the
wheel takes a pride in his ship, he will almost always keep glancing
over his shoulder to see whether the other fellow is gaining. But Jack
Benton used to look round when there was nothing there; and what is
curious, the other men seemed to catch the trick when they were
steering. One day the Old Man turned out just as the man at the wheel
looked behind him.
"What are you looking at?" asked the captain.
"Nothing, sir," answered the man.
"Then keep your eye on the mizzen-royal," said the Old Man, as if he
were forgetting that we weren't a square-rigger.
"Ay, ay, sir," said the man.
The captain told me to go below and work up the latitude from the
dead-reckoning, and he went forward of the deck-house and sat down to
read, as he often did. When I came up, the man at the wheel was looking
round again, and I stood beside him and just asked him quietly what
everybody was looking at, for it was getting to be a general habit. He
wouldn't say anything at first, but just answered that it was nothing.
But when he saw that I didn't seem to care, and just stood there as if
there were nothing more to be said, he naturally began to talk.
He said that it wasn't that he saw anything, because there wasn't
anything to see except the spanker sheet just straining a little, and
working in the sheaves of the blocks as the schooner rose to the short
seas. There wasn't anything to be seen, but it seemed to him that the
sheet made a queer noise in the blocks. It was a new manilla sheet; and
in dry weather it did make a little noise, something between a creak and
a wheeze. I looked at it and looked at the man, and said nothing; and
presently he went on. He asked me if I didn't notice anything peculiar
about the noise. I listened awhile, and said I didn't notice anything.
Then he looked rather sheepish, but said he didn't think it could be his
own ears, because every man who steered his trick heard the same thing
now and then,—sometimes once in a day, sometimes once in a night,
sometimes it would go on a whole hour.
"It sounds like sawing wood," I said, just like that.
"To us it sounds a good deal more like a man whistling 'Nancy Lee.'" He
started nervously as he spoke the last words. "There, sir, don't you
hear it?" he asked suddenly.
I heard nothing but the creaking of the manilla sheet. It was getting
near noon, and fine, clear weather in southern waters,—just the sort of
day and the time when you would least expect to feel creepy. But I
remembered how I had heard that same tune overhead at night in a gale of
wind a fortnight earlier, and I am not ashamed to say that the same
sensation came over me now, and I wished myself well out of the Helen
B., and aboard of any old cargo-dragger, with a windmill on deck, and
an eighty-nine-forty-eighter for captain, and a fresh leak whenever it
breezed up.
Little by little during the next few days life on board that vessel came
to be about as unbearable as you can imagine. It wasn't that there was
much talk, for I think the men were shy even of speaking to each other
freely about what they thought. The whole ship's company grew silent,
until one hardly ever heard a voice, except giving an order and the
answer. The men didn't sit over their meals when their watch was below,
but either turned in at once or sat about on the forecastle, smoking
their pipes without saying a word. We were all thinking of the same
thing. We all felt as if there were a hand on board, sometimes below,
sometimes about decks, sometimes aloft, sometimes on the boom end;
taking his full share of what the others got, but doing no work for it.
We didn't only feel it, we knew it. He took up no room, he cast no
shadow, and we never heard his footfall on deck; but he took his whack
with the rest as regular as the bells, and—he whistled "Nancy Lee." It
was like the worst sort of dream you can imagine; and I daresay a good
many of us tried to believe it was nothing else sometimes, when we stood
looking over the weather rail in fine weather with the breeze in our
faces; but if we happened to turn round and look into each other's eyes,
we knew it was something worse than any dream could be; and we would
turn away from each other with a queer, sick feeling, wishing that we
could just for once see somebody who didn't know what we knew.
There's not much more to tell about the Helen B. Jackson, so far as I
am concerned. We were more like a shipload of lunatics than anything
else when we ran in under Morro Castle and anchored in Havana. The cook
had brain fever, and was raving mad in his delirium; and the rest of the
men weren't far from the same state. The last three or four days had
been awful, and we had been as near to having a mutiny on board as I
ever want to be. The men didn't want to hurt anybody; but they wanted to
get away out of that ship, if they had to swim for it; to get away from
that whistling, from that dead shipmate who had come back, and who
filled the ship with his unseen self! I know that if the Old Man and I
hadn't kept a sharp lookout, the men would have put a boat over quietly
on one of those calm nights, and pulled away, leaving the captain and
me and the mad cook to work the schooner into harbour. We should have
done it somehow, of course, for we hadn't far to run if we could get a
breeze; and once or twice I found myself wishing that the crew were
really gone, for the awful state of fright in which they lived was
beginning to work on me too. You see I partly believed and partly
didn't; but, anyhow, I didn't mean to let the thing get the better of
me, whatever it was. I turned crusty, too, and kept the men at work on
all sorts of jobs, and drove them to it until they wished I was
overboard, too. It wasn't that the Old Man and I were trying to drive
them to desert without their pay, as I am sorry to say a good many
skippers and mates do, even now. Captain Hackstaff was as straight as a
string, and I didn't mean those poor fellows should be cheated out of a
single cent; and I didn't blame them for wanting to leave the ship, but
it seemed to me that the only chance to keep everybody sane through
those last days was to work the men till they dropped. When they were
dead tired they slept a little, and forgot the thing until they had to
tumble up on deck and face it again. That was a good many years ago. Do
you believe that I can't hear "Nancy Lee" now, without feeling cold down
my back? For I heard it, too, now and then, after the man had explained
why he was always looking over his shoulder. Perhaps it was
imagination. I don't know. When I look back it seems to me that I only
remember a long fight against something I couldn't see, against an
appalling presence, against something worse than cholera or Yellow Jack
or the plague—and, goodness knows, the mildest of them is bad enough
when it breaks out at sea. The men got as white as chalk, and wouldn't
go about decks alone at night, no matter what I said to them. With the
cook raving in his bunk, the forecastle would have been a perfect hell,
and there wasn't a spare cabin on board. There never is on a
fore-and-after. So I put him into mine, and he was more quiet there, and
at last fell into a sort of stupor as if he were going to die. I don't
know what became of him, for we put him ashore alive and left him in the
hospital.
The men came aft in a body, quiet enough, and asked the captain if he
wouldn't pay them off, and let them go ashore. Some men wouldn't have
done it, for they had shipped for the voyage, and had signed articles.
But the captain knew that when sailors get an idea into their heads,
they're no better than children; and if he forced them to stay aboard,
he wouldn't get much work out of them, and couldn't rely on them in a
difficulty. So he paid them off, and let them go. When they had gone
forward to get their kits, he asked me whether I wanted to go, too, and
for a minute I had a sort of weak feeling that I might just as well. But
I didn't, and he was a good friend to me afterwards. Perhaps he was
grateful to me for sticking to him.
When the men went off he didn't come on deck; but it was my duty to
stand by while they left the ship. They owed me a grudge for making them
work during the last few days, and most of them dropped into the boat
without so much as a word or a look, as sailors will. Jack Benton was
the last to go over the side, and he stood still a minute and looked at
me, and his white face twitched. I thought he wanted to say something.
"Take care of yourself, Jack," said I. "So long!"
It seemed as if he couldn't speak for two or three seconds; then his
words came thick.
"It wasn't my fault, Mr. Torkeldsen. I swear it wasn't my fault!"
That was all; and he dropped over the side, leaving me to wonder what he
meant.
The captain and I stayed on board, and the ship-chandler got a West
India boy to cook for us.
That evening, before turning in, we were standing by the rail having a
quiet smoke, watching the lights of the city, a quarter of a mile off,
reflected in the still water. There was music of some sort ashore, in a
sailors' dance-house, I daresay; and I had no doubt that most of the men
who had left the ship were there, and already full of jiggy-jiggy. The
music played a lot of sailors' tunes that ran into each other, and we
could hear the men's voices in the chorus now and then. One followed
another, and then it was "Nancy Lee," loud and clear, and the men
singing "Yo-ho, heave-ho!"
"I have no ear for music," said Captain Hackstaff, "but it appears to me
that's the tune that man was whistling the night we lost the man
overboard. I don't know why it has stuck in my head, and of course it's
all nonsense; but it seems to me that I have heard it all the rest of
the trip."
I didn't say anything to that, but I wondered just how much the Old Man
had understood. Then we turned in, and I slept ten hours without opening
my eyes.
I stuck to the Helen B. Jackson after that as long as I could stand a
fore-and-after; but that night when we lay in Havana was the last time I
ever heard "Nancy Lee" on board of her. The spare hand had gone ashore
with the rest, and he never came back, and he took his tune with him;
but all those things are just as clear in my memory as if they had
happened yesterday.
After that I was in deep water for a year or more, and after I came home
I got my certificate, and what with having friends and having saved a
little money, and having had a small legacy from an uncle in Norway, I
got the command of a coastwise vessel, with a small share in her. I was
at home three weeks before going to sea, and Jack Benton saw my name in
the local papers, and wrote to me.
He said that he had left the sea, and was trying farming, and he was
going to be married, and he asked if I wouldn't come over for that, for
it wasn't more than forty minutes by train; and he and Mamie would be
proud to have me at the wedding. I remembered how I had heard one
brother ask the other whether Mamie knew. That meant, whether she knew
he wanted to marry her, I suppose. She had taken her time about it, for
it was pretty nearly three years then since we had lost Jim Benton
overboard.
I had nothing particular to do while we were getting ready for sea;
nothing to prevent me from going over for a day, I mean; and I thought
I'd like to see Jack Benton, and have a look at the girl he was going to
marry. I wondered whether he had grown cheerful again, and had got rid
of that drawn look he had when he told me it wasn't his fault. How could
it have been his fault, anyhow? So I wrote to Jack that I would come
down and see him married; and when the day came I took the train and
got there about ten o'clock in the morning. I wish I hadn't. Jack met me
at the station, and he told me that the wedding was to be late in the
afternoon, and that they weren't going off on any silly wedding trip, he
and Mamie, but were just going to walk home from her mother's house to
his cottage. That was good enough for him, he said. I looked at him hard
for a minute after we met. When we had parted I had a sort of idea that
he might take to drink, but he hadn't. He looked very respectable and
well-to-do in his black coat and high city collar; but he was thinner
and bonier than when I had known him, and there were lines in his face,
and I thought his eyes had a queer look in them, half shifty, half
scared. He needn't have been afraid of me, for I didn't mean to talk to
his bride about the Helen B. Jackson.
He took me to his cottage first, and I could see that he was proud of
it. It wasn't above a cable's length from high-water mark, but the tide
was running out, and there was already a broad stretch of hard, wet sand
on the other side of the beach road. Jack's bit of land ran back behind
the cottage about a quarter of a mile, and he said that some of the
trees we saw were his. The fences were neat and well kept, and there was
a fair-sized barn a little way from the cottage, and I saw some
nice-looking cattle in the meadows; but it didn't look to me to be much
of a farm, and I thought that before long Jack would have to leave his
wife to take care of it, and go to sea again. But I said it was a nice
farm, so as to seem pleasant, and as I don't know much about these
things, I daresay it was, all the same. I never saw it but that once.
Jack told me that he and his brother had been born in the cottage, and
that when their father and mother died they leased the land to Mamie's
father, but had kept the cottage to live in when they came home from sea
for a spell. It was as neat a little place as you would care to see: the
floors as clean as the decks of a yacht, and the paint as fresh as a
man-o'-war. Jack always was a good painter. There was a nice parlour on
the ground floor, and Jack had papered it and had hung the walls with
photographs of ships and foreign ports, and with things he had brought
home from his voyages: a boomerang, a South Sea club, Japanese straw
hats, and a Gibraltar fan with a bull-fight on it, and all that sort of
gear. It looked to me as if Miss Mamie had taken a hand in arranging it.
There was a brand-new polished iron Franklin stove set into the old
fireplace, and a red table-cloth from Alexandria embroidered with those
outlandish Egyptian letters. It was all as bright and homelike as
possible, and he showed me everything, and was proud of everything, and
I liked him the better for it. But I wished that his voice would sound
more cheerful, as it did when we first sailed in the Helen B., and
that the drawn look would go out of his face for a minute. Jack showed
me everything, and took me upstairs, and it was all the same: bright and
fresh and ready for the bride. But on the upper landing there was a door
that Jack didn't open. When we came out of the bedroom I noticed that it
was ajar, and Jack shut it quickly and turned the key.
"That lock's no good," he said, half to himself. "The door is always
open."
I didn't pay much attention to what he said, but as we went down the
short stairs, freshly painted and varnished so that I was almost afraid
to step on them, he spoke again.
"That was his room, sir. I have made a sort of store-room of it."
"You may be wanting it in a year or so," I said, wishing to be pleasant.
"I guess we won't use his room for that," Jack answered in a low voice.
Then he offered me a cigar from a fresh box in the parlour, and he took
one, and we lit them, and went out; and as we opened the front door
there was Mamie Brewster standing in the path as if she were waiting for
us. She was a fine-looking girl, and I didn't wonder that Jack had been
willing to wait three years for her. I could see that she hadn't been
brought up on steam-heat and cold storage, but had grown into a woman by
the sea-shore. She had brown eyes, and fine brown hair, and a good
figure.
"This is Captain Torkeldsen," said Jack. "This is Miss Brewster,
captain; and she is glad to see you."
"Well, I am," said Miss Mamie, "for Jack has often talked to us about
you, captain."
She put out her hand, and took mine and shook it heartily, and I suppose
I said something, but I know I didn't say much.
The front door of the cottage looked toward the sea, and there was a
straight path leading to the gate on the beach road. There was another
path from the steps of the cottage that turned to the right, broad
enough for two people to walk easily, and it led straight across the
fields through gates to a larger house about a quarter of a mile away.
That was where Mamie's mother lived, and the wedding was to be there.
Jack asked me whether I would like to look round the farm before dinner,
but I told him I didn't know much about farms. Then he said he just
wanted to look round himself a bit, as he mightn't have much more chance
that day; and he smiled, and Mamie laughed.
"Show the captain the way to the house, Mamie," he said. "I'll be along
in a minute."
So Mamie and I began to walk along the path, and Jack went up toward the
barn.
"It was sweet of you to come, captain," Miss Mamie began, "for I have
always wanted to see you."
"Yes," I said, expecting something more.
"You see, I always knew them both," she went on. "They used to take me
out in a dory to catch codfish when I was a little girl, and I liked
them both," she added thoughtfully. "Jack doesn't care to talk about his
brother now. That's natural. But you won't mind telling me how it
happened, will you? I should so much like to know."
Well, I told her about the voyage and what happened that night when we
fell in with a gale of wind, and that it hadn't been anybody's fault,
for I wasn't going to admit that it was my old captain's, if it was. But
I didn't tell her anything about what happened afterwards. As she didn't
speak, I just went on talking about the two brothers, and how like they
had been, and how when poor Jim was drowned and Jack was left, I took
Jack for him. I told her that none of us had ever been sure which was
which.
"I wasn't always sure myself," she said, "unless they were together.
Leastways, not for a day or two after they came home from sea. And now
it seems to me that Jack is more like poor Jim, as I remember him, than
he ever was, for Jim was always more quiet, as if he were thinking."
I told her I thought so, too. We passed the gate and went into the next
field, walking side by side. Then she turned her head to look for Jack,
but he wasn't in sight. I shan't forget what she said next.
"Are you sure now?" she asked.
I stood stock-still, and she went on a step, and then turned and looked
at me. We must have looked at each other while you could count five or
six.
"I know it's silly," she went on, "it's silly, and it's awful, too, and
I have got no right to think it, but sometimes I can't help it. You see
it was always Jack I meant to marry."
"Yes," I said stupidly, "I suppose so."
She waited a minute, and began walking on slowly before she went on
again.
"I am talking to you as if you were an old friend, captain, and I have
only known you five minutes. It was Jack I meant to marry, but now he is
so like the other one."
When a woman gets a wrong idea into her head, there is only one way to
make her tired of it, and that is to agree with her. That's what I did,
and she went on talking the same way for a little while, and I kept on
agreeing and agreeing until she turned round on me.
"You know you don't believe what you say," she said, and laughed. "You
know that Jack is Jack, right enough; and it's Jack I am going to
marry."
Of course I said so, for I didn't care whether she thought me a weak
creature or not. I wasn't going to say a word that could interfere with
her happiness, and I didn't intend to go back on Jack Benton; but I
remembered what he had said when he left the ship in Havana: that it
wasn't his fault.
"All the same," Miss Mamie went on, as a woman will, without realising
what she was saying, "all the same, I wish I had seen it happen. Then I
should know."
Next minute she knew that she didn't mean that, and was afraid that I
would think her heartless, and began to explain that she would really
rather have died herself than have seen poor Jim go overboard. Women
haven't got much sense, anyhow. All the same, I wondered how she could
marry Jack if she had a doubt that he might be Jim after all. I suppose
she had really got used to him since he had given up the sea and had
stayed ashore, and she cared for him.
Before long we heard Jack coming up behind us, for we had walked very
slowly to wait for him.
"Promise not to tell anybody what I said, captain," said Mamie, as girls
do as soon as they have told their secrets.
Anyhow, I know I never did tell any one but you. This is the first time
I have talked of all that, the first time since I took the train from
that place. I am not going to tell you all about the day. Miss Mamie
introduced me to her mother, who was a quiet, hard-faced old New England
farmer's widow, and to her cousins and relations; and there were plenty
of them, too, at dinner, and there was the parson besides. He was what
they call a Hard-shell Baptist in those parts, with a long, shaven upper
lip and a whacking appetite, and a sort of superior look, as if he
didn't expect to see many of us hereafter—the way a New York pilot
looks round, and orders things about when he boards an Italian
cargo-dragger, as if the ship weren't up to much anyway, though it was
his business to see that she didn't get aground. That's the way a good
many parsons look, I think. He said grace as if he were ordering the men
to sheet home the topgallant-sail and get the helm up. After dinner we
went out on the piazza, for it was warm autumn weather; and the young
folks went off in pairs along the beach road, and the tide had turned
and was beginning to come in. The morning had been clear and fine, but
by four o'clock it began to look like a fog, and the damp came up out of
the sea and settled on everything. Jack said he'd go down to his cottage
and have a last look, for the wedding was to be at five o'clock, or soon
after, and he wanted to light the lights, so as to have things look
cheerful.
"I will just take a last look," he said again, as we reached the house.
We went in, and he offered me another cigar, and I lit it and sat down
in the parlour. I could hear him moving about, first in the kitchen and
then upstairs, and then I heard him in the kitchen again; and then
before I knew anything I heard somebody moving upstairs again. I knew he
couldn't have got up those stairs as quick as that. He came into the
parlour, and he took a cigar himself, and while he was lighting it I
heard those steps again overhead. His hand shook, and he dropped the
match.
"Have you got in somebody to help?" I asked.
"No," Jack answered sharply, and struck another match.
"There's somebody upstairs, Jack," I said. "Don't you hear footsteps?"
"It's the wind, captain," Jack answered; but I could see he was
trembling.
"That isn't any wind, Jack," I said; "it's still and foggy. I'm sure
there's somebody upstairs."
"If you are so sure of it, you'd better go and see for yourself,
captain," Jack answered, almost angrily.
He was angry because he was frightened. I left him before the fireplace,
and went upstairs. There was no power on earth that could make me
believe I hadn't heard a man's footsteps overhead. I knew there was
somebody there. But there wasn't. I went into the bedroom, and it was
all quiet, and the evening light was streaming in, reddish through the
foggy air; and I went out on the landing and looked in the little back
room that was meant for a servant-girl or a child. And as I came back
again I saw that the door of the other room was wide open, though I knew
Jack had locked it. He had said the lock was no good. I looked in. It
was a room as big as the bedroom, but almost dark, for it had shutters,
and they were closed. There was a musty smell, as of old gear, and I
could make out that the floor was littered with sea-chests, and that
there were oilskins and such stuff piled on the bed. But I still
believed that there was somebody upstairs, and I went in and struck a
match and looked round. I could see the four walls and the shabby old
paper, an iron bed and a cracked looking-glass, and the stuff on the
floor. But there was nobody there. So I put out the match, and came out
and shut the door and turned the key. Now, what I am telling you is the
truth. When I had turned the key, I heard footsteps walking away from
the door inside the room. Then I felt queer for a minute, and when I
went downstairs I looked behind me, as the men at the wheel used to look
behind them on board the Helen B.
Jack was already outside on the steps, smoking. I have an idea that he
didn't like to stay inside alone.
"Well?" he asked, trying to seem careless.
"I didn't find anybody," I answered, "but I heard somebody moving
about."
"I told you it was the wind," said Jack contemptuously. "I ought to
know, for I live here, and I hear it often."
There was nothing to be said to that, so we began to walk down toward
the beach. Jack said there wasn't any hurry, as it would take Miss Mamie
some time to dress for the wedding. So we strolled along, and the sun
was setting through the fog, and the tide was coming in. I knew the
moon was full, and that when she rose the fog would roll away from the
land, as it does sometimes. I felt that Jack didn't like my having heard
that noise, so I talked of other things, and asked him about his
prospects, and before long we were chatting as pleasantly as possible.
I haven't been at many weddings in my life, and I don't suppose you
have, but that one seemed to me to be all right until it was pretty near
over; and then, I don't know whether it was part of the ceremony or not,
but Jack put out his hand and took Mamie's and held it a minute, and
looked at her, while the parson was still speaking.
Mamie turned as white as a sheet and screamed. It wasn't a loud scream,
but just a sort of stifled little shriek, as if she were half frightened
to death; and the parson stopped, and asked her what was the matter, and
the family gathered round.
"Your hand's like ice," said Mamie to Jack, "and it's all wet!"
She kept looking at it, as she got hold of herself again.
"It don't feel cold to me," said Jack, and he held the back of his hand
against his cheek. "Try it again."
Mamie held out hers, and touched the back of his hand, timidly at
first, and then took hold of it.
"Why, that's funny," she said.
"She's been as nervous as a witch all day," said Mrs. Brewster severely.
"It is natural," said the parson, "that young Mrs. Benton should
experience a little agitation at such a moment."
Most of the bride's relations lived at a distance, and were busy people,
so it had been arranged that the dinner we'd had in the middle of the
day was to take the place of a dinner afterwards, and that we should
just have a bite after the wedding was over, and then that everybody
should go home, and the young couple would walk down to the cottage by
themselves. When I looked out I could see the light burning brightly in
Jack's cottage, a quarter of a mile away. I said I didn't think I could
get any train to take me back before half-past nine, but Mrs. Brewster
begged me to stay until it was time, as she said her daughter would want
to take off her wedding dress before she went home; for she had put on
something white with a wreath that was very pretty, and she couldn't
walk home like that, could she?
So when we had all had a little supper the party began to break up, and
when they were all gone Mrs. Brewster and Mamie went upstairs, and Jack
and I went out on the piazza to have a smoke, as the old lady didn't
like tobacco in the house.
The full moon had risen now, and it was behind me as I looked down
toward Jack's cottage, so that everything was clear and white, and there
was only the light burning in the window. The fog had rolled down to the
water's edge, and a little beyond, for the tide was high, or nearly, and
was lapping up over the last reach of sand within fifty feet of the
beach road.
Jack didn't say much as we sat smoking, but he thanked me for coming to
his wedding, and I told him I hoped he would be happy, and so I did. I
daresay both of us were thinking of those footsteps upstairs, just then,
and that the house wouldn't seem so lonely with a woman in it. By and by
we heard Mamie's voice talking to her mother on the stairs, and in a
minute she was ready to go. She had put on again the dress she had worn
in the morning.
Well, they were ready to go now. It was all very quiet after the day's
excitement, and I knew they would like to walk down that path alone now
that they were man and wife at last. I bade them good-night, although
Jack made a show of pressing me to go with them by the path as far as
the cottage, instead of going to the station by the beach road. It was
all very quiet, and it seemed to me a sensible way of getting married;
and when Mamie kissed her mother good-night, I just looked the other
way, and knocked my ashes over the rail of the piazza. So they started
down the straight path to Jack's cottage, and I waited a minute with
Mrs. Brewster, looking after them, before taking my hat to go. They
walked side by side, a little shyly at first, and then I saw Jack put
his arm round her waist. As I looked he was on her left and I saw the
outline of the two figures very distinctly against the moonlight on the
path; and the shadow on Mamie's right was broad and black as ink, and it
moved along, lengthening and shortening with the unevenness of the
ground beside the path.
I thanked Mrs. Brewster, and bade her good-night; and though she was a
hard New England woman, her voice trembled a little as she answered, but
being a sensible person, she went in and shut the door behind her as I
stepped out on the path. I looked after the couple in the distance a
last time, meaning to go down to the road, so as not to overtake them;
but when I had made a few steps I stopped and looked again, for I knew I
had seen something queer, though I had only realised it afterwards. I
looked again, and it was plain enough now; and I stood stock-still,
staring at what I saw. Mamie was walking between two men. The second man
was just the same height as Jack, both being about a half a head taller
than she; Jack on her left in his black tail-coat and round hat, and the
other man on her right—well, he was a sailor-man in wet oilskins. I
could see the moonlight shining on the water that ran down him, and on
the little puddle that had settled where the flap of his sou'wester was
turned up behind: and one of his wet, shiny arms was round Mamie's
waist, just above Jack's. I was fast to the spot where I stood, and for
a minute I thought I was crazy. We'd had nothing but some cider for
dinner, and tea in the evening, otherwise I'd have thought something had
got into my head, though I was never drunk in my life. It was more like
a bad dream after that.
I was glad Mrs. Brewster had gone in. As for me, I couldn't help
following the three, in a sort of wonder to see what would happen, to
see whether the sailor-man in his wet togs would just melt away into the
moonshine. But he didn't.
I moved slowly, and I remembered afterwards that I walked on the grass,
instead of on the path, as if I were afraid they might hear me coming. I
suppose it all happened in less than five minutes after that, but it
seemed as if it must have taken an hour. Neither Jack nor Mamie seemed
to notice the sailor. She didn't seem to know that his wet arm was round
her, and little by little they got near the cottage, and I wasn't a
hundred yards from them when they reached the door. Something made me
stand still then. Perhaps it was fright, for I saw everything that
happened just as I see you now.
Mamie set her foot on the step to go up, and as she went forward, I saw
the sailor slowly lock his arm in Jack's, and Jack didn't move to go up.
Then Mamie turned round on the step, and they all three stood that way
for a second or two. She cried out then—I heard a man cry like that
once, when his arm was taken off by a steam-crane—and she fell back in
a heap on the little piazza.
I tried to jump forward, but I couldn't move, and I felt my hair rising
under my hat. The sailor turned slowly where he stood, and swung Jack
round by the arm steadily and easily, and began to walk him down the
pathway from the house. He walked him straight down that path, as
steadily as Fate; and all the time I saw the moonlight shining on his
wet oilskins. He walked him through the gate, and across the beach road,
and out upon the wet sand, where the tide was high. Then I got my breath
with a gulp, and ran for them across the grass, and vaulted over the
fence, and stumbled across the road. But when I felt the sand under my
feet, the two were at the water's edge; and when I reached the water
they were far out, and up to their waists; and I saw that Jack Benton's
head had fallen forward on his breast, and his free arm hung limp beside
him, while his dead brother steadily marched him to his death. The
moonlight was on the dark water, but the fog-bank was white beyond, and
I saw them against it; and they went slowly and steadily down. The water
was up to their armpits, and then up to their shoulders, and then I saw
it rise up to the black rim of Jack's hat. But they never wavered; and
the two heads went straight on, straight on, till they were under, and
there was just a ripple in the moonlight where Jack had been.
It has been on my mind to tell you that story, whenever I got a chance.
You have known me, man and boy, a good many years; and I thought I would
like to hear your opinion. Yes, that's what I always thought. It wasn't
Jim that went overboard; it was Jack, and Jim just let him go when he
might have saved him; and then Jim passed himself off for Jack with us,
and with the girl. If that's what happened, he got what he deserved.
People said the next day that Mamie found it out as they reached the
house, and that her husband just walked out into the sea, and drowned
himself; and they would have blamed me for not stopping him if they'd
known that I was there. But I never told what I had seen, for they
wouldn't have believed me. I just let them think I had come too late.
When I reached the cottage and lifted Mamie up, she was raving mad. She
got better afterwards, but she was never right in her head again.
Oh, you want to know if they found Jack's body? I don't know whether it
was his, but I read in a paper at a Southern port where I was with my
new ship that two dead bodies had come ashore in a gale down East, in
pretty bad shape. They were locked together, and one was a skeleton in
oilskins.