ABOUT six o’clock the sound of a motor, collected
out of the wide country and narrowed
under the trees of the avenue,
brought the household out in excitement on to the
steps. Up among the beeches, a thin iron gate
twanged; the car slid out from a net of shadow, down
the slope to the house. Behind the flashing windscreen
Mr. and Mrs. Montmorency produced—arms
waving and a wild escape to the wind of her mauve
motor-veil—an agitation of greeting. They were
long-promised visitors. They exclaimed, Sir Richard
and Lady Naylor exclaimed and signalled: no one
spoke yet. It was a moment of happiness, of
perfection.
In those days, girls wore crisp white skirts and
transparent blouses clotted with white flowers;
ribbons, threaded through with a view to appearance,
appeared over their shoulders. So that Lois
stood at the top of the steps looking cool and fresh;
she knew how fresh she must look, like other young
girls, and clasping her elbows tightly behind her
back, tried hard to conceal her embarrassment.
The dogs came pattering out from the hall and
stood beside her; above, the vast façade of the house
stared coldly over its mounting lawns. She wished
she could freeze the moment and keep it always.
But as the car approached, as it stopped, she stooped
down and patted one of the dogs.
As the car drew up the Montmorencys unwound
from their rugs. They stood shaking hands and
laughing in the yellow theatrical sunshine. They
had motored over from Carlow. Two toppling
waves of excitement crashed and mingled; for
moments everybody was inaudible. Mrs. Montmorency
looked up the steps. “And this is the
niece!” she exclaimed with delight. “Aren’t we
dusty!” she added, as Lois said nothing. “Aren’t
we too terribly dusty!” And a tired look came
down at the back of her eyes at the thought of how
dusty she was.
“She’s left school now,” said Sir Richard
proudly.
“I don’t think I should have known you,” said
Mr. Montmorency, who had not seen Lois since
she was ten and evidently preferred children.
“Oh, I think she’s the image of Laura—”
“—But we have tea waiting. Are you really
sure, now, you’ve had tea?”
“Danielstown’s looking lovely, lovely. One sees
more from the upper avenue—didn’t you clear some
trees?”
“The wind had three of the ashes—you came
quite safe? No trouble? Nobody at the cross-roads?
Nobody stopped you?”
“And are you sure now about tea?” continued
Lady Naylor. “After all that—look, it’s coming
up now. No, Francie, don’t be ridiculous; come
in now, both of you.”
They swept in; their exclamations, constricted
suddenly, filling the hall. There was so much to
say after twelve years: they all seemed powerless.
Lois hesitated, went in after them and, as nobody
noticed, came out again. The car with the luggage
turned and went round to the back, deeply scoring
the gravel. She yawned and looked out over the
sweep to the lawn beyond, where little tufts of
shadow pricked like reeds from water out of the
flat gold light. Beyond the sunk fence, six Kerry
cows followed each other across with wading steps
and stood under a lime tree. All the way up
the house the windows were open; light came diagonally
from window to window through corner rooms.
Two stories up, she could have heard a curtain
rustle, but the mansion piled itself up in silence
over the Montmorencys’ voices.
She yawned with reaction. It was simply the
Montmorencys who had come; whom all day one
had been expecting. Yet she had been unable
to read, had scattered unfinished letters over her
table, done the flowers atrociously. Sweet-peas had
spun and quivered between her fingers from their
very importance.... “I apologize for the mauve
sweet-peas,” she would have liked to be able to
say to Mr. Montmorency. “I don’t care for
mauve myself. I can’t think why I ever picked
them; there were plenty of others. But, as a
matter of fact, I was nervous.” And—“Nervous?”
she would wish Mr. Montmorency to ask
her searchingly, “why?” But she had her reserves,
even in imagination; she would never tell him.
But she had seen at once that Mr. Montmorency,
who must be really so subtle, would not take the
trouble to understand her.
Her cousin Laurence had gone upstairs with a
book when he heard the motor. Now she could
hear him knocking out his pipe on a window sill.
He leaned out further and asked, pointing down,
in a cautious whisper: “Are they all in?”
She signalled a warning, nodding.
“What are you doing?” he said.
“I don’t know. What are you doing?”
“Nothing particular.”
“I thought I’d take the dogs down the beech
walk.”
“Why?”
“Oh, I just thought ...”
“Come up and tell me about the Montmorencys.”
She signalled another warning: the Montmorencys
were in the hall. To avoid the hall she had
to go right round to a side door and up the back
stairs. These smelt of scrubbed wood, limewash,
and the ducks already roasting for the Montmorencys’
dinner. Pushing open a door at the top
she let a gust of this through with her.
“Duck,” said Laurence, sniffing gratefully. It
still surprised her that Laurence, who looked
ethereal, should spend so much time when he was
not being intellectual in talking and apparently
thinking about food. She supposed that this was
because he had, as he had once said, no emotional
life. “I live,” he used to say, “from meal to meal.”
When she said, “Why?” he put up his hands
and his eyebrows and made a gesture. When he
did this in front of Gerald she felt uncomfortable.
Soldiers did not talk about food, they ate it. They
ate, in fact, rather more than Laurence, but always
with a deprecating, absent look.
Laurence had been reading in the ante-room, in
one of the circle of not very comfortable shell-shaped
chairs that no one took seriously. His room
was a floor higher; it had not seemed worth while
to go up. He had brought the wrong book and
dared not go down for another; otherwise he would
not have felt in need of her conversation. Personally,
she liked the ante-room, though it wasn’t
the ideal place to read or talk. Four rooms opened
off it; at any moment a door might be opened,
or blow open, sending a draught down one’s neck.
People passed through it continually, so that one
kept having to look up and smile. Yet Lois always
seemed to be talking there, standing with a knee
on a chair because it was not worth while to sit
down, and her life was very much complicated by
not knowing how much of what she said had been
overheard, or by whom, or how far it would go.
The high windows were curtainless; tasselled
fringes frayed the light at the top. The white sills,
the shutters folded back in their frames were blistered,
as though the house had spent a day in the
tropics. Exhausted by sunshine, the backs of the
crimson chairs were a thin light orange; a smell of
camphor and animals drawn from skins on the
floor by the glare of morning still hung like dust
on the evening chill. Going through to her room
at nights Lois often tripped with her toe in the jaws
of a tiger; a false step at any time sent some great
claw skidding over the polish. Pale regimental
groups, reunions a generation ago of the family or
the neighbourhood gave out from the walls a vague
depression. There were two locked bookcases of
which the keys had been lost, and a troop of ebony
elephants brought back from India by some one
she did not remember paraded along the tops of
the bookcases.
“Whow—whow—whow!” said Laurence, imitating
her panting. “Why do you hurry like that?”
“I suppose it’s a habit,” said Lois, confused.
“What did you want?”
“Well, I came to tell you about the Montmorencys.”
“Oh, all right; go on. Where are they?”
“Having more tea; Aunt Myra made them....
Well, they arrived, as you probably heard, and it
was all rather devastating. There was a good deal
of emotion. And she would do nothing but say
she was dusty, and of course she was dusty, so there
was nothing for me to say.”
“So what did you say?”
“And he said he would never have known me.”
“Honest, bluff sort of chap?”
“Oh no,” said Lois and flushed, for really Laurence
was too insulting. She laughed and glanced
at her finger-nails—the only part of one’s person,
she had observed, of which it was possible to be
conscious socially. “Haven’t you met him?”
“I think I did once. I think I thought he was
rather fatuous. But I was very young at the time—I
mayn’t have met him at all.”
“Isn’t it extraordinary,” said Lois confidentially,
“the way one’s nails grow—I mean, when one
comes to think: yards and yards of inexhaustible
nail coming out of one. As a matter of fact,” she
added, “I once rather had illusions about Mr.
Montmorency—since I was ten. He came to stay
with my mother and me when we were at Leamington.
After dinner—I was allowed to sit up—Mother
walked out of the house and left us. We
were trying chickens at that time and I dare say
she went out to shut them up and then simply
stayed in the garden. Mr. Montmorency and I
talked for some time, then he got solemn and went
to sleep all in a moment. I sat and watched him
in absolute fascination. You know the way men
go to sleep after dinner? Well, that wasn’t at all
the way he did.... Then my mother came, very
much refreshed at having been away from us, and
said I was a rather bad hostess, and woke Mr.
Montmorency up. I have thought since, anyone
might have said she was a rather bad hostess.
But everything she did seemed so natural.”
“Oh, she was lovely,” said Laurence, indifferent.
“So you see he is really not bluff, or he wouldn’t
have gone to sleep in that perfectly simple, exposed
way. He was melancholy and exhausted and wise,
which I did appreciate as a child, when most visitors
were so noisy at one.”
“Extraordinary,” said Laurence, looking out of
the window.
Laurence was comfortable to talk to because of
his indifference to every shade of her personality.
With him, she felt committed by speech itself to a
display of such unfathomable silliness that she might
just as well come out—and did—with assertions
surprising even to herself. When he yawned, took
a book up, said he was hungry or simply went
away, she was not discountenanced. It was those
tender, those receptive listeners to whom one felt
afterwards sold and committed. It is true that
when first she had met Laurence again she had
wished to impress him as an intellectual girl. But
an evening of signal failure when he had told her
she should read less and more thoroughly and,
on the whole he thought, talk less, had involved
a certain re-arrangement of attitude. She had reattained
confidence, expanding under his disapproval.
“It doesn’t occur to you,” he said with an air
of sinister triumph, “that the Montmorencys may
have come up the front stairs while you came up
the back stairs and be both in their room, listening?”
Unthinkable, but the very sound of the thing
was a shock. Crimson, she ran to the door of the
spare room: struggling with unreason, knocked
defiantly, rattled the handle. She went in, finally,
with a sense of impertinence, for the new arrivals
were spiritually in possession.
The Blue Room was of course empty; with no
one to listen. The trunks had been carried up and
set down, unstrapped, at the foot of the wide bed.
The room smelt of bleaching cretonnes and ten
days’ emptiness; curtains in a draught from the
door made a pale movement. Lois had put a vase
of geraniums on the dressing-table; now she admired
their cubes in delicate balance, spraying against the
light. And there was the festival air of those
candles, virgin, with long white wicks. Two arm-chairs
faced round intently into the empty grate
with its paper fan—in them Mr. and Mrs. Montmorency
would sit, perhaps, to discuss the experiences
of the day. More probably, they would talk
in bed. One of the things Lois chiefly wanted to
know about marriage was—how long it took one,
sleeping with the same person every night, to outlive
the temptation to talk well into the morning?
There would be nothing illicit about nocturnal talking,
as there had been at school; no one would be
entitled to open a door sharply with: “Now go to
sleep now, you two; that’s enough for to-night,”
as had so often happened during her visits to friends.
Would conversation, in the absence of these prohibitions,
cease to interest? Lois had heard of
couples who disturbed each other by breathing
and preferred to occupy different rooms: no allowance
was made for such couples at Danielstown.
The Blue Room dressing-room furniture was marble-topped
to allow for spills or breakages of a gentleman’s
bottles, and there was a virile boot-rack for
every possible kind of boot. Lois, doubtfully, had
put moss roses on Mr. Montmorency’s table.
“Didn’t it occur to you,” said Laurence, “that
they couldn’t possibly have gone through without
my seeing them?”
Lois came out and shut the door of the spare
room. “But panic,” she said, “is beyond one.
Things like that are so awful. I shall never forget
discussing a Miss Elliot—a very musical woman—with
Livvy or some one, out here, and, my dear,
she was in there the whole time and being English
and honourable began to rattle her chest of drawers.
I could hardly look at her straight for the rest of
the visit. However, she also covered herself with
confusion, because she put all her vases of flowers
outside her door at night, and Brigid fell over
them bringing the morning tea. Aunt Myra was
terribly irritated and talked about nursing-homes.”
“I shouldn’t expect there will be anything so
very hygienic about Mrs. Montmorency.”
“Damn,” said Lois, looking disproportionately
worried and moving off towards her own room
suddenly. “I have got letters to finish.” Speaking
of Brigid had reminded her that there were
letters on regimental note-paper lying about all
over her room and that Brigid, who took an interest,
would be likely to see them when she came up with
the hot water. Not that they mattered really, but
at the thought of some letters people wrote her she
did feel rather a fool.
Laurence had pale blue, rather prominent eyes
that moved slowly, though the rest of his movements
were jerky. Looking up at her now with a
not unaware kind of blandness, he said: “Do tell
me, what do you write about?”
“Life in general.”
“You amaze me—now if I did write letters no
one would read them if they were not intelligent.
You must have the golden touch.”
“Naturally one is expected to be amusing.”
“And how many subalterns do you write to?”
This was disconcerting, also, she felt strongly,
irrelevant. If these young men wrote to her, they
were unimportant; besides, she only answered every
third letter. These young men, concrete, blocking
her mental view by their extreme closeness,
moved shadowless in a kind of social glare numbing
to the imagination. Whereas Mr. Montmorency
came out distinct from the rather rare gloom with
which she invested her childhood; her feeling for
him provided agreeable matter for introspection.
However much he might loom and darken up to
the close-up view, he would never be out of
focus.
“How many?” said Laurence again, picking up
his book but still looking at her inexorably. The
unkindest thing he had called her friend Livvy
Thompson was—a rather probable channel for the
life-force; and really when he asked questions of
this kind she did not know what he must think.
But it was reticence as to a lack rather than as
to a superabundance that produced her embarrassment.
“Three—no, two,” she said coldly, “because one
of them is a captain.”
Going into her room she shut the door. Laurence
got up and walked round the ante-room. For the
hundredth time he looked disparagingly along the
backs of the books in the locked bookcases. Then
he heard his aunt and Mrs. Montmorency beginning
to come upstairs.
II
THE Naylors and the Montmorencys had
always known each other; it was an affair
of generations. Hugo had stayed at
Danielstown as a boy for months together, and
knew the place as well as his own house, he told
Francie, and certainly liked it better. He had expressed
this preference, which had come as a shock
to her, when they were first engaged. She was
pained as by an expression of irreligion. She consoled
herself, and rehabilitated him secretly, by
remembering he had had a stepfather and could
never have known the meaning of family life—she
had a delicate woman’s strong feeling for “naturalness.”
She intended to make up to him for the
deficiencies of his childhood, but, almost immediately
after their marriage, Hugo sold Rockriver.
Now she would always blame herself for not having
dissuaded him, but he had been so set at the time
on an idea of going to Canada and she so foolishly
anxious to compensate him for what she was not
by going there with him and thriving. So when
the idea of Canada failed, they had no house, and
she, after all, no vocation. As for Hugo, he had
expected little of life.
Francie had heard all her life of the Naylors of
Danielstown, her cousins and theirs had married;
but Ireland is large and she had not met them till
she came to Danielstown on a bridal visit. Then,
of course, they had known each other always; there
had been no beginning. She knew she had never
in all her life been so happy as on that first visit;
time, loose-textured, had had a shining undertone,
happiness glittered between the moments. She had
had, too, very strongly a sense of return, of having
been awaited. Rooms, doorways had framed a
kind of expectancy of her; some trees in the distance,
the stairs, a part of the garden seemed always
to have been lying secretly at the back of her
mind.
It was, also, on that first and only other visit,
that she had made friends with Myra—that in itself
was memorable. Myra was “interesting,” cultivated,
sketched beautifully, knew about books and
music. She had been to Germany, Italy, everywhere
that one visits acquisitively. It had been a
bond to discover that Francie and Myra must have
been in Germany at the same time, the summer of
’92, though without meeting. Myra was the same
age as Francie—they had been presented the same
year, though not at the same Drawing-room—and
thought of Hugo as quite a boy: she could not
help showing it. Sometimes, guessing what she
had shown, she would laugh and say something
clever and quite irrelevant to cover the awkwardness.
For Hugo was ten years younger than both
of them, Francie’s husband.
Francie and Myra had had long remarkable talks
about almost everything, confidential if not alarmingly
intimate—walking, driving, on the seat by
the caroline allspice tree, and at the head of the
stairs at night—while their candle-flames stooped
from their vehemence.
When at the end of that visit the Montmorencys
left Danielstown this had seemed to Francie more
of a pause than a break in the continuity. “Next
spring,” they all four promised each other, shaking
hands and kissing at the foot of the steps—it was
then autumn, the bronze trees were sifted through
by the wind and shivered along the outlines—“Next
summer, Hugo,” Myra exclaimed, “at latest!” and
the last view they had of her was as standing bright
and imperative. Only as they drove away did the
trees run, watery, into the sky and Francie’s lids
prick: she slipped her hand into Hugo’s under the
rug. And, pressing it, he had alone to continue
the business of turning, yearning and waving back
till a bend in the avenue.
She had felt, perhaps, a chilly breath from the
future. Between their smart turning out, with a
roll of carriage wheels, through the gates with their
clipped laurels, and their swerving in with a grind
of motor brakes twelve years afterwards, nothing
large was to intervene. Their life, through which
they went forward uncertainly, without the compulsion
of tragedy, was a net of small complications.
There was the drag of his indecisions, the
fine snapping now and then of her minor relinquishments.
Her health, his temperament, their
varying poverty—they were delayed, deflected.
She was ordered abroad for successive winters, to
places he could not expect to endure. He came
and went without her; going for consolation, of
course, to Danielstown. The Naylors sent her out
wails, injunctions and declarations. They would
never, never be happy till she was with them
also.
So at last Hugo and Francie returned together.
And to-day something—that break in the trees on
the avenue, something unremembered about the
face of the house, some intensification of the silence
surrounding it, or perhaps simply Lois’ figure standing
there on the steps—made the place different.
Lady Naylor and Mrs. Montmorency now went
upstairs together. Francie looked down at the top
step to see if the marks were still there—becoming
much excited in the course of an argument about
Robert Hugh Benson she had waved her candle
and scattered a rain of hot grease. But there was
a new stair-carpet. Myra looked down also, but
in surprise; she did not remember. She had argued
with so many people in twelve years—nowadays she
argued about Galsworthy.
“I shouldn’t be surprised,” she said, lowering
her voice as they approached the ante-room, “if
we found Laurence up here—my nephew. He
is with us a good deal, between Oxford. Though
I expect it is dull for him. He is not out of doors
very much; he is very intellectual. Though, of
course, he plays tennis.”
Francie was much relieved, on entering the ante-room,
to find that Laurence had gone. “It’s so
nice,” she said, “the way you have the house full of
young people.” She turned to the right instinctively,
to her old door.
“No, this way, Francie, the Blue Room. The
rooks on that side of the house disturbed so many
people; we’ve changed the rooms round and put
Lois in there; she prefers them.”
As they came into the Blue Room, Francie saw
their two faces reflected in the tall dressing-table
glass, the door swinging behind. “Myra’s aged!”
she thought with a shock. Her own face never
seemed to have changed at all.
She said: “You look wonderful, you know. I
couldn’t think when I was ever to see you again,
or Richard either.”
Myra kissed her—a compact, sudden pursing
and placing of the lips. It was as though they were
meeting again only now. The door swung to with
a rush. “It’s been too bad, too bad—not even as
if you had been in Canada!”
The linen of Myra’s sleeve was cool to the touch
of the dusty Francie. Myra wore a grey linen
dress with embroidered panels, a lace scarf twice
round the throat and a green hat dipping in front
and trimmed with clover. Her bright grey eyes,
with very black, urgent pupils, continued in a deep
crease at each outside corner. High on the curve
of her cheeks, like petals, bright mauve-pink colour
became, within kissing distance, a net of fine delicate
veins. Her eyebrows, drawn in a pointed arch,
suggested tragic surprise till one saw the arch never
flattened, the face beneath never changed from its
placid eagerness, its happy dissatisfaction. “Has
she aged?” Francie thought, glancing closely and
shyly again as they parted. Yes, she felt something
set now in Myra; she was happier, harder.
Myra receded now that the kiss was over. There
was life to go on with, the duty of love and pleasure
fully discharged. She moved round the Blue
Room, nodded out of a window to some one distant
coming out from some trees—she could never
learn how one vanishes in the dark of a house.
She glanced intently along the books in the book-trough.
“Lois has not changed the books!” she
exclaimed. “You know how I like them to be
appropriate. Here’s a technical book on rubber a
man left behind last summer—it looks ridiculous.
She’s a girl who never forgets the same thing twice;
always something different....”
“She looks sweet, I think. And surely the image
of Laura?”
“She’s not so much like Laura in character.
There’s a good deal, I sometimes think, of poor
Walter.”
“Wasn’t it terribly sad about Walter?”
“To tell you the truth, it was what we always
expected,” said Lady Naylor.
When Francie was left alone she went to the
window and shook the dust out of her motor veil.
Then—she was so very tired from motoring, everything
seemed to rush past—she sat down on the
sofa and put her hands over her eyes. Her mind
lay back in the silence, but there was a kind of
sentinel in her waiting for Hugo. She did not
know what she should say if he noticed the drive
from Carlow really had been too much for her.
She had said beforehand she was afraid it might
be too much, and he had said: nonsense, that she
was fit for anything nowadays. Flattered by this,
she gave in. She was so tired—just for these few
moments when she let herself go—she could not
bear to realize Danielstown. Her thoughts ached.
When she looked out, there were some intolerable
trees and a strip of gold field hot on the skyline.
When she heard steps coming she fled to the
washstand. Her skin was dry, her hair felt laden
and limp, it was so dusty. But that was the fine,
the phenomenal weather for which, in this country,
one could not be thankful enough. When Hugo
came through from his dressing-room she was
washing her hands—they turned in the water like
gentle porpoises in a slaver of violet soap.
“Well,” he said, looking round the room.
“Well, Hugo ... isn’t it lovely?”
“Richard’s in great form—I thought I’d never
get up at all to you.... Not tired?”
“Indeed, no.... Doesn’t it all seem the same as
ever?”
“I tell you one thing: Myra’s ageing. Didn’t
you notice?”
“Oh,” said Francie vaguely. She stooped her
face to the basin, the rain-water comforted, creeping
into the pores. “Oh!” She dried her face in
damask, among stiff roses. “But then, we all
are.”
“She’s got into a terrible habit of shutting doors.”
“Times have been worse down here. Yes, I
thought, you know, she had rather a strained look.
What does Richard think of the situation?...
Oh, and had you any idea that Lois was so grown
up? I had imagined her quite a schoolgirl. She’s
so pretty, such a ... a frank little face.”
“She’s self-conscious,” said Hugo, “but I dare
say most girls of that age are.... I should lie
down now for a bit, it will freshen you up—though
you don’t need it. Then would you like me to
brush your hair?”
Francie got her dressing-gown out of a trunk and
lay down on the sofa. She had just relaxed there
when Hugo said that the sofa did not look comfortable
and she had better lie on the bed. He
made a valley for her head between the two pillows—he
did not believe it rested anybody to lie with
their head high—and she lay down on the bed
with her head in the valley. “Oh, but I don’t
think I ought to lie on this lovely quilt,” she soon
protested.
“They’re not fussy here,” returned Hugo;
“do lie and be still.”
So she lay and watched him begin to unpack her
two boxes, carry dresses over his arms and lay
them along the shelves of the “gentleman’s wardrobe.”
She wondered: whatever would Richard
and Myra think?—“Uxorious” they would be
bound to declare; Richard who could hardly handle
a jug without dropping it, and Myra who would
not have him otherwise.
“What a disgusting noise,” said Hugo, pausing
and listening.
“Somebody playing a gramophone—”
They might well say she had taken the brilliant
young man he’d once been and taught him to
watch her, to nurse her and shake out her dresses.
And she knew she could, now, never explain to
Myra what she had failed to explain twelve years
ago—when there had been so much less to explain
and to justify—how Hugo was too much for her
altogether. How she had tried, but had not been
able, to keep him—first from marrying her, then
from giving up Canada, leaving his friends when
she had to go to the south of France, or from brushing
her hair in the evenings.
“Hugo, you might leave that blue dress out;
I think I’ll wear it.... When was it you were in
love with Laura?”
“When I was twenty-two—I was in a sort of
way. She was lovely then—though indeed she was
always lovely. But she was never happy at all,
even here. She never knew what she wanted—she
was very vital.”
He hesitated over two pairs of evening shoes.
“Leave the bronze ones out,” she suggested.
“They go with the blue.” She lay with her eyes
shut a moment, then asked, “But why wouldn’t
she marry you?”
Francie’s delicacy, her absences from him, her
long queer relapses into silence gave her the right
to ask curious things, as from a death-bed. Hugo,
wandering at the end of the bed, looked at her
feet thoughtfully.
“She wanted her mind made up,” he said at last,
“and I couldn’t do that—why should I? I had
enough to do with my own mind. And she was
Richard’s own sister—talk and talk and you’d
never know where you had her. And if she thought
you had her, she’d start a crying-fit. Then she
went up North and met Farquar, and I imagine
that that was all fixed up before she knew where
she was or had time to get out of it. After that of
course she really had got something to be unhappy
about. Yet I don’t believe things ever really
mattered to Laura. Nothing got close to her: she
was very remote.”
“I wonder if Lois is remote?”
“What I think I felt about Laura,” pursued
Hugo, interested, “was, she was never real in the
way I wanted. Nobody was before you, as you
know.... If you get up now, I can brush your
hair.”
“It is very dusty,” said Mrs. Montmorency.
She had met Laura in England and been very
shy of her. Laura was a success in England, and
so quite brilliant—she was too Irish altogether for
her own country. Lois had been at school as usual
and did not come home because Laura had forgotten
which day the Montmorencys were coming.
Six months afterwards, without giving anyone notice
of her intention, Laura had died.
“It still seems odd,” remarked Mrs. Montmorency,
“that I shouldn’t have met Lois.” Seating
herself in front of the glass she took out the pins
one by one, then shook down her hair round her
face—bright bronze threads went in and out,
crisply, over the light-grey waves—she ran it
through with her finger-tips, shaking her head ruefully.
But the dust seemed to have gone, perhaps
because she was happier, less tired; or perhaps she
had left a drift of it between the two pillows. Her
husband, selecting a brush, knocked over the vase
of geraniums. “The darlings!” she cried out,
mopping with her kimono-sleeve.
“Confusion,” said Hugo, shaking water out of
the brush, “on all who put vases on dressing-tables!”
III
LOIS, dressed for dinner, was tidying her
writing-table; two stamped letters, her
handiwork, leaned on the clock. She
shook out her pink suède blotter and started to sort
its contents, but had to re-read everything. Gerald,
who had written about a tournament, concluded:
“You have the loveliest soft eyes.” She was perplexed,
thought: “But what can I do?” and snapped
the letter, with others, under a rubber band. Then
she pulled out a drawer called “general” and swept
the rest into it. She had a waste-paper basket, but
only for envelopes. Strokes of the gong, brass
bubbles, came bouncing up from the hall. She
ran to the glass, changed a necklace, had an apprehensive
interchange with her own reflection. What
of the night?
Mrs. Montmorency and Laurence were in the
drawing-room. They looked anxious, nothing
showed the trend of the conversation. The pale
room rose to a height only mirrors followed above
the level of occupation; this disproportionate zone
of emptiness dwarfed at all times figures and furniture.
The distant ceiling imposed on consciousness
its blank white oblong, and a pellucid silence,
distilled from a hundred and fifty years of conversation,
waited beneath the ceiling. Into this
silence, voices went up in stately attenuation.
Now there were no voices; Mrs. Montmorency
and Laurence sat looking away from each
other.
As Lois came in Laurence slapped his pockets
over and saying something about a pipe left the
room quickly, leaving Lois in the grip of a tête-à-tête.
Mrs. Montmorency, seated in a window, held
by a corner a copy of the Spectator, that had slipped
down against the silk of her dress, as though she
must be sure to retain this constant refuge from
conversation. Vague presence, barely a silhouette,
the west light sifting into her fluffy hair and lace
wrappings so that she half melted, she gave so little
answer to one’s inquiry that one did not know
how to approach. So Lois stood staring, full in
the light.
“Oh, you do look sweet!” exclaimed the visitor.
“Black is so striking. No, you are not like Laura—I
don’t know who you’re like.”
“Aunt Myra isn’t sure about black for girls,”
said Lois, sweeping forward for admiration the folds
of her dress. “But a white slip lightens it.”
“And I expect you are having a wonderful time
now you’re grown up?”
“Oh, well ...” said Lois. She went across to
the fireplace and rose on her tiptoes, leaning her
shoulders against the marble. She tried not to
look conscious. She still felt a distinct pride at
having grown up at all; it seemed an achievement,
like marriage or fame. Having a wonderful time,
she knew, meant being attractive to a number of
young men. If she said, “Yes, I do,” it implied
“Yes, I am, very—” and she was not certain.
She was not certain, either, how much she enjoyed
herself. “Well, yes, I do,” she said finally.
“Tell me,” continued Mrs. Montmorency,
“wasn’t that your cousin Laurence?”
“As a matter of fact I am Uncle Richard’s niece
and he Aunt Myra’s nephew.”
“And isn’t he very intellectual?”
“I suppose he is, really.”
“I’m afraid,” said Mrs. Montmorency, “I had
no idea how to talk to him. I suppose you’d never
find that difficult. I expect now, Lois, you’re very
modern.”
“Oh, well, not really,” said Lois, pleased. Mrs.
Montmorency’s expression, condensing now from
her outline, was of such affection and interest that
Lois was moved to go on: “You could talk to him
really about almost anything except about politics.
He isn’t allowed any here because the ones he
brings over from Oxford are all wrong.”
“Wrong?” cried the visitor with a startled flush,
putting up a hand to her face as though to press
back the mounting colour. “Wrong—which way?
How do you mean, ‘wrong’?”
“Inconvenient.”
“Oh,” said Mrs. Montmorency. And upon a
recurrence of the puzzled silence that had been the
note of Lois’ entrance, Sir Richard came in. Sir
Richard was very much worried by visitors who
came down early for dinner: evidently he had not
expected this of Francie. “Oh!” he exclaimed
reproachfully, “this is too bad; I had no idea you
were down. Myra’s been delayed—you know
yourself how it happens.”
“Indeed, yes,” said Francie warmly. She would
never have been in time herself if she had had a
home of her own. Only the little blanks and rifts
in her life accounted for her punctuality.
Sir Richard, touching his tie vaguely, wandered
about the room, displacing with some irritation the
little tables that seemed to spring up in his path,
in the pent-up silence of a powerful talker not yet
in gear.
“Very fine weather,” he said at last, “warm at
nights—or would you like me to shut that window?”
He was bothered; he could not remember
how well he had once known Francie, or decide
at just what degree of intimacy he was expected
to pick her up again. “Lois has grown up, hasn’t
she?” he continued, pointing out his niece with an
air of inspiration. “She seems to me to have
grown up very fast. Now how long is it since you
saw her over in England?”
“But I never did see her.”
“That was extraordinary,” said Sir Richard,
looking from one to the other. “Didn’t you meet
poor Laura?”
“I did, but Lois was out.”
“That was too bad.” Sir Richard’s bother
increased, with a suspicion of something somewhere.
He observed rather flatly: “Then it can
hardly be such a surprise to you that she’s grown
up.”
“Not in the same way.”
“We can all sit out on the steps to-night,” said
Lois, determined to check the couple in their
career of inanity. She went across to a window
and folded her arms on the sill.
The screen of trees that reached like an arm from
behind the house—embracing the lawns, banks and
terraces in mild ascent—had darkened, deepening
into a forest. Like splintered darkness, branches
pierced the faltering dusk of leaves. Evening
drenched the trees; the beeches were soundless
cataracts. Behind the trees, pressing in from the
open and empty country like an invasion, the orange
bright sky crept and smouldered. Firs, bearing
up to pierce, melted against the brightness. Somewhere,
there was a sunset in which the mountains
lay like glass.
Dark had so gained the trees that Lois, turning
back from the window, was surprised at how light
the room was. Day, still coming in from the fields
by the south windows, was stored in the mirrors,
in the sheen of the wall-paper, so that the room still
shone. Mr. Montmorency had come in and was
standing where she had stood, his shoulders against
the mantelpiece.
“We can sit out on the steps to-night, can’t we?”
persisted Lois. And because no one answered or
cared and a conversation went on without her, she
felt profoundly lonely, suspecting once more for
herself a particular doom of exclusion. Something
of the trees in their intimacy of shadow was
shared by the husband and wife and their host
in the tree-shadowed room. She thought of love
with its gift of importance. “I must break in on
all this,” she thought as she looked round the
room.
“Do you still go to sleep after dinner?” she asked
Mr. Montmorency.
“It’s a thing that I never have done,” he said,
annoyed.
“But it’s what I chiefly remember about you.”
“I’m afraid,” he said, tolerant, “you are mixing
me up with some one else.”
“Listen, Richard,” said Francie; “are you sure
we will not be shot at if we sit out late on the steps?”
Sir Richard laughed and they all shared his
amusement. “We never have yet, not even with
soldiers here and Lois dancing with officers up and
down the avenue. You’re getting very English,
Francie! Isn’t Francie getting very English? Do
you think maybe we ought to put sandbags behind
the shutters when we shut up at nights?”
“No, but Richard, seriously—” began Francie
then, as they all stared, laughed and had to give
up and go on laughing. Now in County Carlow
they had said things were bad round here, that she
made a grave mistake in coming at all. But then,
as Richard would certainly say, that was County
Carlow all over.
Lady Naylor came in arm-in-arm with Laurence
and said they were all very punctual. “The gong’s
only gone three minutes, also I could be certain I
never heard any of you go down. But I was delayed,
as I told Richard to tell you. Shall we go in?”
“Francie wants to know,” said Sir Richard, offering
Francie his arm, “if we haven’t got a machine-gun?”
“Ah, you’re too bad!”
“Do you dance on the avenue?” said Mr. Montmorency
to Lois.
“Only once, for a bet. I and a man called Mr.
Lesworth danced to the white gate, and the man that
we had the bet with walked after us carrying the
gramophone. But naturally, I don’t as a rule.”
“It would come hard on your shoes, I expect,”
said Mr. Montmorency distantly.
“And the men we know can’t get over here in
the evening, now.”
“Still, I expect you have a very gay time,” said
Mr. Montmorency, and turned away.
In the dining-room, the little party sat down
under the crowd of portraits. Under that constant
interchange from the high-up faces staring
across—now fading each to a wedge of fawn-colour,
and each looking out from a square of darkness
tunnelled into the wall—Sir Richard and Lady
Naylor, their nephew, niece and old friends had a
thin, over-bright look, seemed on the air of the room
unconvincingly painted, startled, transitory. Spaced
out accurately round the enormous table—whereon,
in what was left of the light, damask birds and
roses had an unearthly shimmer—each so enisled
and distant that a remark at random, falling short
of a neighbour, seemed a cry of appeal, the six, in
spite of an emphasis of speech and gesture they
unconsciously heightened, dwindled personally.
While above, the immutable figures, shedding on
to the wash of dusk smiles, frowns, every vestige of
personality, kept only attitude—an outmoded modestness,
a quirk or a flare, hand slipped under a
ruffle or spread airily over the cleft of a bosom—cancelled
time, negatived personality and made
of the lower cheerfulness, dining and talking, the
faintest exterior friction.
In Laurence’s plate of clear soup six peas floated.
Six accurate spoonfuls, each with a pea in it, finished
the soup. He glanced right in his aunt’s direction,
left in Mrs. Montmorency’s: both were talking.
Mr. Montmorency, listening to Lady Naylor,
seemed to be looking across at Laurence, but he
sat with his back to the light so that Laurence,
short-sighted, could not be sure—he preferred
uncertainty.
Lady Naylor spoke of the way things were, with
her pointed spoon poised over her plate. She
noticed the others were waiting, and with a last
bright emphatic look in Hugo’s direction bent to
finish her soup. He said at once to Laurence:
“And what do you think of things?”
“Things? Over here?”
“Yes—yes.”
“Seem to be closing in,” said Laurence, crumbling
his bread detachedly; “rolling up rather.”
“Ah!” nodded Mr. Montmorency, in significant
comprehension.
“Ssh!” exclaimed Lady Naylor, running out a
hand at both of them over the cloth. She frowned,
with a glance at the parlourmaid. “Now you
mustn’t make Laurence exaggerate. All young
men from Oxford exaggerate. All Laurence’s
friends exaggerate: I have met them.”
“If you have noticed it,” said her nephew, “it is
probably so.”
Lois, on his other side, leant eagerly to Mr.
Montmorency. “If you are interested, would you
care to come and dig for guns in the plantation?
Or if I dig, will you come as a witness? Three
of the men on the place here swear there are guns
buried in the lower plantation. Michael Keelan
swears he was going through there, late, and saw
men digging. I asked him, ‘What were they
like?’ and he said, ‘The way they would be,’ and
I said, why didn’t he ask them what they were
doing, and he said, ‘Sure, why would I; didn’t I
see them digging, and they with spades?’ So it
appears he fled back the way he had come.”
“—Ah, that’s nonsense now!” Sir Richard
exploded. “Michael would see anything: he is
known to have seen a ghost. I will not have the
men talking, and at all accounts I won’t have them
listened to.”
“All the same,” pursued Lois, “I feel that one
ought to dig. If there is nothing there I can
confound Michael for the good of his soul, and if
there should be guns, Uncle Richard, just think
of finding them! And surely we ought to know.”
“And why would we want to know? You’ll
have the place full of soldiers, trampling the young
trees. There’s been enough damage in that plantation
with the people coming to sight-see: all
Michael’s friends. Now I won’t have digging at
all: do you understand?” said Sir Richard, flushed.
Francie felt torn in herself, dividedly sympathetic.
“I expect one can’t be too careful....
The poor young little trees ... and besides,” she
added to Lois, “one might blow oneself up.”
“This country,” continued Sir Richard, “is altogether
too full of soldiers, with nothing to do but
dance and poke old women out of their beds to
look for guns. It’s unsettling the people, naturally.
The fact is, the Army’s got into the habit of
fighting and doesn’t know what else to do with
itself, and also the Army isn’t at all what it used to
be. I was held up yesterday for I wouldn’t like
to say how long, driving over to Ballyhinch, by a
thing like a coffee-pot backing in and out of a gate,
with a little brute of a fellow bobbing in and out
at me from under a lid at the top. I kept my temper,
but I couldn’t help telling him I didn’t know what
the country was coming to—and just when we’d
got the horses accustomed to motors. ‘You’ll do
no good,’ I told him, ‘in this unfortunate country
by running about in a thing like a coffee-pot.’
And those patrols in lorries run you into a ditch as
soon as look at you. They tell me there’s a great
deal of socialism now in the British Army.”
“Well, it’s difficult for them all,” said his wife,
pacific, “and they’re doing their best, I think.
The ones who come over here seem quite pleasant.”
“What regiment have you now at Clonmore?”
“The 1st Rutlands.”
“And there are some Field Gunners and Garrison
Gunners too,” added Lois. “Most people seem
to prefer the Garrison Gunners.”
“The Garrison Gunners dance better,” said
Laurence to Mrs. Montmorency. “It would be the
greatest pity if we were to become a republic and
all these lovely troops were taken away.”
“Fool,” said Lois across the flowers. Mr.
Montmorency looked at her in surprise.
Lady Naylor continued: “From all the talk, you
might think almost anything was going to happen,
but we never listen. I have made it a rule not to
talk, either. In fact, if you want rumours, we
must send you over to Castle Trent. And I’m
afraid also the Careys are incorrigible.... Oh
yes, Hugo, it’s all very well to talk of disintegration;
of course there is a great deal of disintegration
in England and on the Continent. But one
does wonder sometimes whether there’s really much
there to disintegrate.... I dare say there may have
been.... And if you talk to the people they’ll
tell you the whole thing’s nonsense: and after all
what is a country if it isn’t the people? For instance,
I had a long conversation this morning with
Mrs. Pat Gegan, who came down about the apples—you
remember her, Hugo, don’t you, she always
asks after you: she was really delighted to hear you
were coming back—‘It is the way the young ones
do be a bit wild,’ she said, and I really agreed with
her. She said young people were always the same,
and wasn’t it the great pity. She is a most interesting
woman: she thinks a great deal. But then
our people do think. Now have you ever noticed
the English? I remember a year ago when I was
staying with Anna Partridge in Bedfordshire—she
is always so full of doing things in the village,
little meetings and so on. Well, I went to one
of her meetings, and really—those village women
sitting round in hats and so obviously despising
her! And not a move on their faces. I said to
her afterwards: ‘I do think you’re splendid, Anna,
the way you throw yourself into things—but really
what you can do with people with so little brain—’
She seemed quite annoyed and said that at least
they were loyal. I said they hadn’t got any alternative,
and if they had an alternative I didn’t suppose
they’d see it. She said they had hearts of
gold if they didn’t wear them on their sleeves, and
I said I thought it was a pity they didn’t—it would
have brightened them up a bit. She said that at
least one knew where one was with them, and I
said I wouldn’t live among people who weren’t
human. Then I thought it seemed a shame to
unsettle her, if she really likes living in England....
Oh, and I said to Mrs. Gegan this morning:
‘Some of your friends would like us to go, you
know,’ and she got so indignant she nearly wept.
And the Trents were telling me— Oh, Hugo,
the Trents are coming over to tennis to-morrow,
specially for you and Francie. And the Thompsons
are coming, and I believe the Hartigans.
The Hartigan girls are still all there, you’ll be
surprised to hear. Nobody seems to marry them—and
oh, a Colonel and Mrs. Boatley are coming,
and three or four of the Rutlands—”
“Five,” said Lois.
“—Anyhow, several Rutlands. Every one’s
so delighted to hear that you and Francie are
back.”
“The Trents,” said Lois to Mr. Montmorency,
with indignation, “swear that you and they are
related. But you are not, surely? It is a perfect
obsession of theirs.”
When he said he supposed that he was, through
an aunt’s marriage, she became pensive. It seemed
odd that even the Trents should have a closer
claim than she had. Though it was she who had
been humming with agitation the whole morning.
The sweet-peas in the urn before them bore evidence
to her agitation: they all slanted to the
west like a falling haystack. It was true she now
hoped nothing more of him, but he still was in
shadow, faintly, from the kindly monolith of her
childhood. What he might have been, what he
persisted in being, met in her mind with a jar,
with a grate of disparity. The face she had watched
sleeping—wiped clear of complexity, quiet but so
communicative in stillness that, watching, she
seemed to have shared in some kind of suspense,
stayed—like the bright blur from looking too long
at a lamp—over the face now turned to her, intelligent,
dulled, with its sub-acid smile. She was
likely to think of him now as a limitation, Mrs.
Montmorency’s limitation; something about Mrs.
Montmorency that was a pity. The Trents could
have him.
“I expect,” she said slightingly, “you are related
to every one.”
“The longer one lives in this country,” he all
too agreeably said, “the more likely that seems.”
Yet she had been certain she felt him looking at
her while she argued with Uncle Richard about the
guns. Seeking a likeness, perhaps. It was this
consciousness that had lent her particular fervour—though
she was interested in the guns. Though
when she turned round his profile was turned
away—in, it seemed, the most scornful repudiation.
He had, as a matter of fact, been looking at her,
but without intention and with a purely surface
observation of detail. When she turned away,
light from behind her ran a finger round the curve
of her jaw. When she turned his way, light took
the uncertain, dinted cheek-line where, under the
eyes, flesh was patted on delicately over the rise of
the bone. Her eyes, long and soft-coloured, had
the intense brimming wandering look of a puppy’s;
in repose her lips met doubtfully, in a never-determined
line, so that she never seemed to have quite
finished speaking. Her face was long, her nose
modelled down from the bridge then finished off
softly and bluntly as by an upward flick of the
sculptor’s thumb. Her chin had emphasis, seemed
ready for determination. He supposed that unformed,
anxious to make an effect, she would marry
early.
“Danielstown can’t have been so exciting when
you were here before,” said Lois to Mrs. Montmorency.
But Mrs. Montmorency, in an absence of mind
amounting to exaltation, had soared over the company.
She could perform at any moment, discomfitingly,
these acts of levitation. She was staring
into one of the portraits.
IV
LOIS was sent upstairs for the shawls; it
appeared that a touch of dew on the bare
skin might be fatal to Lady Naylor or Mrs.
Montmorency. On the stairs, her feet found their
evening echoes; she dawdled, listening. When
she came down everybody was on the steps—at the
top, on the wide stone plateau—the parlourmaid
looking for somewhere to put the coffee tray.
Mrs. Montmorency sat in the long chair; her
husband was tucking a carriage rug round her knees.
“If you do that,” Lois could not help saying, “she
won’t be able to walk about, which is the best part
of sitting out.”
No one took any notice: Mr. Montmorency went
on tucking.
“Haven’t you got a wrap for yourself?” said
Lady Naylor. Lois took a cushion and sat on the
top step with her arms crossed, stroking her elbows.
“I shouldn’t sit there,” her aunt continued; “at
this time of night stone will strike up through
anything.”
“If you don’t get rheumatism now,” added
Francie, “you will be storing up rheumatism.”
“It will be my rheumatism,” said Lois as gently
as possible, but added inwardly: “After you’re both
dead.” A thought that fifty years hence she might
well, if she wished, be sitting here on the steps,—with
or without rheumatism—having penetrated
thirty years deeper ahead into Time than they could,
gave her a feeling of mysteriousness and destination.
And she was fitted for this by being twice as complex
as their generation—for she must be: double
as many people having gone to the making of her.
Laurence, looking resentfully round for somewhere
to sit—she had taken the only cushion—said:
“I suppose you think ants cannot run up your
legs if you cannot see them?”
Mr. Montmorency surprised her by offering a
cigarette. He had a theory, he said, that ants did
not like cigarette smoke. The air was so quiet
now, the flame ran up his match without a tremble.
“The ants are asleep,” she said, “they disappear
into the cracks of the steps. They don’t bite,
either; but the idea is horrid.”
“Don’t you want a chair?” When she said she
didn’t, he settled back in his own. Creaks ran
through the wicker, discussing him, then all was
quiet. He was not due to leave the ship in which
they were all rushing out into Time till ten years
after the others, though it was to the others that
he belonged. Turning half round, she watched
light breathe at the tips of the cigarettes; it seemed
as though everybody were waiting. Night now
held the trees with a toneless finality. The sky
shone, whiter than glass, fainting down to the
fretted leaf-line, but was being steadily drained
by the dark below, to which the grey of the
lawns, like smoke, as steadily mounted. The house
was highest of all with toppling immanence, like
a cliff.
“I don’t think,” said Francie, “I remember
anything so—so quiet as evenings here.”
“Trees,” said Laurence, shifting his pipe. His
shirt-front was high above them, he stood by the
door with his foot on the scraper.
“This time to-morrow,” said Lady Naylor, “we
shall want to be quiet—after the tennis party.”
She let out a sigh that hung in the silence, like breath
in cold air.
“Oh yes, the party! The tennis party ...”
“Francie, did I tell you who were coming?”
“You told her,” said Laurence. “I heard
you.”
“It is the people who don’t play tennis who
make it so tiring.”
Something about the way, the resigned way,
Francie’s hands lay out on the rug gave her the
look of an invalid. “It is a good thing,” said Sir
Richard, “you two never went out to Canada. I
never liked the idea myself; I was very much against
it at the time, if you remember.”
“I was divided about it myself,” said Hugo.
“It seemed worth trying, and yet there was so much
against it. I don’t know that I should have done
very much good—I wonder.”
They wondered with him, with degrees of indifference.
Lois stroked her dress—the feel of the
stuff was like cobwebs, sticky and damp. There
must be dew falling.
“Oh!” cried Francie. “Listen!”
She had so given herself to the silence that the
birth of sound, after which the others were still
straining, had shocked her nerves like a blow.
They looked, from the steps, over a bay of fields,
between the plantations, that gave on a sea of space.
Far east, beyond the demesne: a motor, straining
cautiously out of the silence. A grind, an anguish
of sound as it took the hill.
“Patrols,” said Laurence.
Hugo reached out and pressed a hand on to
Francie’s rug. “Patrols,” he told her, translating
the information.
Sir Richard explained severely: “Out every night—not
always in this direction.”
“They’re early; it’s half-past nine. Now I
wonder ...”
The sound paused, for a moment a pale light
showed up the sky in darkness. Then behind the
screen of trees at the skyline, demesne boundary,
the sound moved shakily, stoopingly, like some
one running and crouching behind a hedge. The
jarring echoed down the spines of the listeners.
They heard with a sense of complicity.
“A furtive lorry is a sinister thing.”
“Laurence, it isn’t furtive!” said. Lady Naylor.
“Can’t you be ordinary? If it wouldn’t be taken
in some absurd kind of way as a demonstration, I
should ask the poor fellows in to have coffee.”
“They’re careful enough,” said Hugo impatiently.
It seemed that the lorry took pleasure in
crawling with such a menace along the boundary,
marking the scope of peace of this silly island,
undermining solitude. In the still night sound
had a breathlessness, as of intention.
“The roads are so rough,” said Lois: she could
see the wary load lurching into the hedges. “I wonder
now,” she added, “who is with the patrol to-night?”
“Some one you know?” cried Francie. But Sir
Richard, who did not like his friends to be distracted
from him by lorries any more than by
introspection or headaches or the observation of
nature, bore this down with one of his major
chords:
“The lower tennis court, Hugo”—waving sideways
into the darkness—“is not what it used to be.
Some cattle got on to it after the rain and destroyed
it. It’s had rolling enough to level a mountain,
but it won’t be the same for a long time. D’you
remember the fours we had on that court that
summer—wasn’t it nineteen-six—you and I and
O’Donnell and poor John Trent?”
“I do. Now was it James O’Donnell or Peter
that went to Ceylon?”
“That was a great summer; I never remember a
summer like it. We had the hay in by the end of
June.”
The lorry ground off east towards Ballyhinch;
silence sifting down on its tracks like sand. Their
world was clear of it and a pressure lightened.
Once more they could have heard a leaf turn in
the trees or a bird shifting along a branch. But
they found it was now very dark. Francie shivered,
and Lady Naylor, rising formally, said she
thought they should go in. “Poor John Trent,”
she added, gathering up her cushions, “never got
over that trouble he had with the Sheehans over the
Madder fishing. It went into court, you know,
and of course he lost. We always told him to keep
it out of court. He was very obstinate.”
“He was indeed,” said Sir Richard. “He made
an enemy of Sheehan and it’s not a good thing to
have made an enemy. Though of course he’s dead
nowadays, so it may not matter.”
“It may to the Archie Trents.... Laurence,
help Uncle Richard in with the long chair, and
remember to bring in your own chair afterwards.”
“I never had a chair.”
“Oh, they haven’t lighted the lamp in the hall.
That is too bad! I am lost without Sarah—do
you remember Sarah, Francie? She died, you
know.”
Lois, sitting still among rising, passing and
vaguely searching figures, cried: “But it’s only just
beginning! You’re missing the whole point. I
shall walk up the avenue.”
Francie went in, groping; trailing her rug. The
three men, carrying wicker chairs, converged at
the door: the chairs jostled. They all put them
down and apologized. Lois repeated: “I shall
walk up the avenue.” But having arranged an
order of procedure they all passed on into the house,
creaking and bumping. She walked down the
steps alone: she had wanted to be alone, but to be
regretted.
“Mind you don’t get locked out!” her uncle
shouted after her. The glass doors shut with a
rattle.
Lois walked alone up the avenue, where she had
danced with Gerald. She thought what a happy
night that had been, and how foolish Mr. Montmorency
now thought them. He had seemed
annoyed at her being young when he wasn’t. She
could not hope to explain that her youth seemed to
her also rather theatrical and that she was only
young in that way because people expected it.
She had never refused a rôle. She could not forgo
that intensification, that kindling of her personality
at being considered very happy and reckless,
even if she were not. She could not hope
to assure him she was not enjoying anything he
had missed, that she was now unconvinced and
anxious but intended to be quite certain, by the
time she was his age, that she had once been happy.
For to explain this—were explanation possible to
so courteous, ironical and unfriendly a listener—would,
she felt, be disloyal to herself, to Gerald,
to an illusion both were called upon to maintain.
Just by the lime, in that dancing night, she had
missed a step and sagged on his arm, which tightened.
His hand slid up between her shoulders;
then, as she steadied back to the rhythm, down
again. They had set out laughing, noisy and
conscious, but soon had to save their breath.
Gerald’s cheek, within an inch of her own, was too
near to see. All the way up, he had not missed
a step; he was most dependable. And remembering
how the family had just now gone into the
house—so flatly, so unregrettingly, slamming the
glass doors—she felt that was what she now wanted
most—his eagerness and constancy. She felt,
like a steady look from him, the perfectness of their
being together.
“Oh, I do want you!”
But he was very musical, he conducted a jazz
band they had at the barracks: while reaching out
in her thoughts she remembered, the band would
be practising now. She was disappointed. To a
line of tune the thought flung her, she danced on
the avenue.
A shrubbery path was solid with darkness, she
pressed down it. Laurels breathed coldly and
close: on her bare arms the tips of leaves were
timid and dank, like tongues of dead animals.
Her fear of the shrubberies tugged at its chain,
fear behind reason, fear before her birth; fear like
the earliest germ of her life that had stirred in
Laura. She went forward eagerly, daring a snap
of the chain, singing; a hand to the thump of her
heart, dramatic with terror. She thought of herself
as forcing a pass. In her life—deprived as
she saw it—there was no occasion for courage,
which like an unused muscle slackened and slept.
High up a bird shrieked and stumbled down
through dark, tearing the leaves. Silence healed,
but kept a scar of horror. The shuttered-in
drawing-room, the family sealed in lamplight, secure
and bright like flowers in a paper-weight—were
desirable, worth much of this to regain. Fear
curled back from the carpet-border.... Now, on
the path: grey patches worse than the dark: they
slipped up her dress knee-high. The laurels
deserted her groping arm. She had come to the
holly, where two paths crossed.
First, she did not hear footsteps coming, and
as she began to notice the displaced darkness
thought what she dreaded was coming, was there
within her—she was indeed clairvoyant, exposed
to horror and going to see a ghost. Then steps,
hard on the smooth earth; branches slipping against
a trench-coat. The trench-coat rustled across the
path ahead, to the swing of a steady walker. She
stood by the holly immovable, blotted out in her
black, and there passed within reach of her hand,
with the rise and fall of a stride, a resolute profile,
powerful as a thought. In gratitude for its fleshliness,
she felt prompted to make some contact:
not to be known seemed like a doom: extinction.
“It’s a fine night,” she would have liked to
observe; or, to engage his sympathies: “Up Dublin!”
or even—since it was in her uncle’s demesne
she was straining under a holly—boldly—“What
do you want?”
It must be because of Ireland he was in such a
hurry; down from the mountains, making a short
cut through their demesne. Here was something
else that she could not share. She could not conceive
of her country emotionally: it was a way of
living, an abstract of several landscapes, or an
oblique frayed island, moored at the north but with
an air of being detached and washed out west from
the British coast.
Quite still, she let him go past in contemptuous
unawareness. His intentions burnt on the dark
an almost visible trail; he might well have been a
murderer he seemed so inspired. The crowd of
trees, straining up from the passive disputed earth,
each sucking up and exhaling the country’s essence—swallowed
him finally. She thought: “Has he
come for the guns?” A man in a trench-coat had
passed without seeing her: that was what it amounted
to.
She ran back to tell, in excitement. Below,
the house waited; vast on its west side, with thin
yellow lines round the downstairs shutters. It
had that excluded, sad, irrelevant look outsides of
houses take in the dark. Inside, they would all
be drawing up closer to one another, tricked by
the half-revelation of lamplight. “Compassed
about,” thought Lois, “by so great a cloud of
witnesses....” Chairs standing round dejectedly;
upstairs, the confidently waiting beds; mirrors
vacant and startling; books read and forgotten,
contributing no more to life; dinner-table certain
of its regular compulsion; the procession of elephants
that throughout uncertain years had not
broken file.
But as Lois went up the steps breathlessly, her
adventure began to diminish. It held ground for
a moment as she saw the rug dropped in the hall
by Mrs. Montmorency sprawl like a body across
the polish. Then confidence disappeared, in a
waver of shadow, among the furniture. Conceivably,
she had just surprised life at a significant
angle in the shrubbery. But it was impossible to
speak of this. At a touch from Aunt Myra adventure
became literary, to Uncle Richard it suggested
an inconvenience; a glance from Mr. Montmorency
or Laurence would make her encounter sterile.
But what seemed most probable was that they
would not listen.... She lighted her candle and
went up to bed—uncivilly, without saying good
night to anyone. Her Uncle Richard, she afterwards
heard, was obliged to sit up till twelve
o’clock. He had not been told she was in, so did
not think it right to lock up the house.
V
GERALD walked across the lawn to the lower
tennis court, swinging his racquet. Once
he put up a hand and touched the back
of his head, but with assurance: it was perfectly
smooth and round. His flannels were gold-white
in the sun; he almost shone. He smiled everywhere.
It was nonsense for him to pretend he did
not care for parties; he went everywhere, he liked
to go out every day.
Everybody was sitting or standing about where
the green slatted seats were, at the edge of the
shade. No one was playing yet; there were two
courts and eighteen players; they were discussing
who was to play first, their voices sharp with renunciation.
Lois was nowhere; Laurence sat on the
ground smoking and taking no part in the argument.
Lady Naylor talked eagerly to a number of guests
who, holding up parasols very straight in the
unusual sunshine and wearing an air of vague
happiness, were waiting for play to begin before
settling down to conversation. Livvy Thompson
was organizing: as Lois’ friend she felt this devolved
upon her in Lois’ absence; also, she liked organizing.
“You and you,” she said shrilly, stabbing the air
within an inch of each player’s chest with a sharp
forefinger, “and why not you and you?” But before
she had ever finished arranging the second four, the
first would become involved again.
“Oh, Mr. Lesworth,” cried Lady Naylor, and
waited for him to approach, “if you really are coming
out, would you bring some more rugs for some
more of the people to sit on?”
He turned and went back to the house. It seemed
very odd about Lois—now where could she be?
Livvy Thompson looked after him anxiously.
Had not Mr. Armstrong come also? During this
temporary absence of her attention two fours
arranged themselves and walked hurriedly out to
take possession of the courts.
The hall, very dark after sunshine, was full of
wraps and racquet presses; shoes had wandered
away from each other under the chairs. The rest
of Gerald’s party—they had all driven out from
Clonmore in a hired motor—were still there, waiting
for Mrs. Vermont. Captain Vermont and
David Armstrong stood holding her things while
she powdered her nose with difficulty before an
antique mirror.
“Aren’t women awful?” she cried gaily, as Gerald
rejoined them. She knew the subalterns hated
going about without her. “My dears, I do wish
I knew if we really were asked. Lois is so—I
mean, well, you know—vague, isn’t she?”
“Well, they wouldn’t mind, anyhow,” said
David, and tried not to sound proprietary.
“Aren’t they hospitable!” Betty Vermont was
not disappointed in Ireland after all. She had
never before been to so many large houses with so
small a sense of her smallness. Of course, they
were all very shabby and not artistic at all. Mrs.
Vermont used to say she longed to be turned
loose in any one of them with a paint-pot—white—and
a few hundred yards of some really nice
cretonne from Barker’s.
“Half Ireland is here,” said David, looking out
at the crowd of cars on the gravel-sweep. “I
doubt if we get any tennis.”
“Ah, well, David, there’s plenty of that at the
club. Now, Gerald, don’t stand there glaring!
You do disapprove of powder, you unkind wretch!”
“Rather not,” said Gerald, beaming. But all
the same he did like girls to have natural complexions—he
was perfectly certain Lois’s was. He
was carrying all the rugs he could find slung over
his shoulder and looked, she informed him, just
like a Bedouin. This was not a thing she could
have said to every man, because really the East
had become so very suggestive. But he was the
dearest boy, so absolutely nice-minded. They all
went out.
“There seem to be many more people here than
I thought we’d asked,” Lady Naylor was saying to
Mrs. Carey of Mount Isabel. “Lois asks people
she meets at the Clonmore club, and then forgets.
I have been rather wondering about the raspberries;
I’ve sent her out to the garden to see about getting
in some more. Colonel and Mrs. Boatley are coming—she
was a Vere Scott, a Fermanagh Vere
Scott.... Why is it that the Hartigans never
will talk to men? I never think they give themselves
a chance, do you? Oh, Mr. Lesworth, how
kind to think of bringing the rugs out! And now
there doesn’t seem anyone left to sit on them....
Look, would you break up that party of girls on
the bank; I don’t think they seem to be sitting on
anything, and anyhow they look dull and would
like to talk. And I am sure they’d be glad if
you’d smoke—the midges are terrible. Who is
that girl in pale blue who’s just coming out?”
“Mrs. Vermont. She—er—I think Miss
Farquar—”
“Oh, well, never mind; it’s a pleasant surprise.”
She went over to Mrs. Vermont with enthusiasm.
“I’m so glad you could come; it’s delightful.”
Gerald looked round everybody again, carefully.
Then he respectfully displaced the Miss Hartigans,
spread out a rug on the bank and sat down between
them. He was at a disadvantage, he could not
remember if he had ever been introduced to them,
whereas they were perfectly certain he had been.
They were pleased at his coming, though on the
other hand they were suffering so terribly from the
midges that what they wanted most at the moment
was to scratch their legs peacefully.
“I call this a frightfully good party,” said Gerald,
breezily.
“Yes, it’s most enjoyable,” agreed Norah
Hartigan.
“I don’t think there’s anything like these tennis
parties you have in Ireland.”
“We have never been to tennis parties in England,”
replied Doreen.
“Oh, you must certainly come over.”
“I dare say we should feel strange,” said Norah
and her sister agreed with her. Gerald smiled
from one to the other so encouragingly that they
told him how a sister of theirs, who was not here
to-day, had once stayed for quite a long time near
London, and had been taken by an aunt, who was
rather what they would call a London Society sort
of person, to a very fashionable party—in South
Kensington it had been. But their sister had not
cared for the party, she thought the English unnatural
and said it was extraordinary how their
voices sounded when they were all shut up in the
one room. “But excuse me,” concluded the elder
Miss Hartigan, turning away because she was
afraid the talk was becoming personal and scratching
her ankle as discreetly as possible, “we should
not say this to you.”
“It was splendid of you to forget I was English.
Well, we shall all be leaving you soon, I dare say;
all we jolly old army of occupation.”
“Oh, one wouldn’t like to call you that,” said
Miss Hartigan, deprecatingly.
“—As soon as we’ve lost this jolly old war.”
“Oh, but one wouldn’t call it a war.”
“If anyone would, we could clean these beggars
out in a week.”
“We think it would be a great pity to have a
war,” said the Hartigans firmly. “There’s been
enough unpleasantness already, hasn’t there?...
And it would be a shame for you all to go,” added
Doreen warmly, but not too warmly because they
were all men. In fact, it was all rather embarrassing,
they fixed their eyes on the players firmly and
wished that the set would finish. They thought
how daring it was of Mr. Lesworth to come so far
to a party at all, and only hoped he would not be
shot on the way home; though they couldn’t help
thinking how, if he should be, they would both feel
so interesting afterwards. “Poor young fellow,”
they thought with particular tenderness because
he was so good-looking, and neither of them, with
this tenderness in their eyes, dared to look at him.
Livvy was walking along the top of the bank
with David Armstrong. She smiled, with a small
tooth over her lower lip; the tip of her nose quivered
downward with feminine sensibility. “It is really
a long time since I have seen you, Mr. Armstrong.”
David was the nicest of all the subalterns; so
agreeable. “Why, yes,” he agreed, “I suppose it
really must be.” He glanced at the brim of her
hat and added: “It has certainly seemed an awful
long time to me.”
“Oh, you mustn’t say that,” cried Livvy; she
blushed to the chin and laughed.
“I don’t see why I shouldn’t,” said David, alarmed
but gratified.
“Well, I mean, you oughtn’t to say it like that!”
“But I can’t help saying what I mean.” His
manliness increased with confusion. “I suppose I
am that kind of fellow.”
“You are awful!” Livvy laughed so much from
the shock of David’s behaviour that people sitting
along the foot of the bank looked up expectantly.
She would not share him, she hurried him off at an
angle and then continued: “Why were you not at
the Mount Isabel bicycle gymkhana? I understood
you to say that you would be. It was the
greatest pity you couldn’t be there, it was a grand
gymkhana, and they had a putting competition too.
And they had sentries armed in the avenue and
made twenty-four pounds for the hospital. And
the priest’s niece from Kilnagowan fell off and cut
her lip; she bled too dreadfully, but Doreen
Hartigan has her V.A.D. certificate. And two
hundred people sat down to tea—how was it now
that you couldn’t be there?”
“On duty,” said David, and took on a mystic
and obstinate look. “I was up with some of the
men and an N.C.O. in those mountains the other
side of the Madder.”
Livvy felt in her spine, running down it from
under her waistband, a sharp little thrill. She
felt all the soldiers’ woman, and said in a glow:
“Well, I call that too awfully dangerous.” He
told her: “It’s what we are here for.” They
glanced at each other, then both were embarrassed—and
showed it—at what they had seen. She
stooped, and her hat was an elegant mushroom.
From David’s complexion blushes cleared slowly
away—the last having never quite vanished into his
hair before another came after it up from his well-fitting
collar.
“I can’t think what Lois can be doing.” She
peered through gaps in the shrubbery towards the
gate of the garden. This concern for her friend
she put up and twirled like a parasol between them.
She sighed: the expansion of her thin little frame,
the rise and fall of her two little points of bosom
were clearly visible under her white silk jersey.
Her panama hat turned down and light tufts of hair
came out in fluttering commas against her cheekbones.
From under the brim her eyes looked,
slanting slightly up at the corners, with a veiled
preoccupied kind of inquisitiveness. She was
inquisitive as to so many things her friend Lois
hoped one might not have to bother about. David
watched her watch the shrubbery for her friend and
thought, with a shock, that this really did seem a
girl he was to be in love with. He had the fatalism
of a recurrent sufferer.
“It will be too bad,” continued Livvy, “if she
doesn’t come soon. You would think she might
be picking those raspberries herself. You see, all
the people she asked from Clonmore have come
and were not expected. If she doesn’t come soon
I must go—yes, indeed I must, Mr. Armstrong—and
see about the two next fours. You see, her
cousin Laurence is no good for that, he is so intellectual,
and Lady Naylor doesn’t much notice the
tennis so long as the party goes off all right. But
it seems too bad she shouldn’t see Mr. Lesworth.
I expect Mr. Lesworth often speaks to you of her,
doesn’t he, Mr. Armstrong?”
“Er—I don’t remember, really.”
“I think it’s wonderful to see a man so much in
love. I must say I often wonder what love feels
like. I always seem to feel so natural about the
men I know. But I suppose that’s because I am
so young—or perhaps I was born platonic. Do
you believe in platonics, Mr. Armstrong?”
“Plato? Jolly old Grecian—what?”
“No, but listen—do you?”
“Well, what I think,” said David, looking carefully
at his racquet and turning it over and over—“of
course it is awfully difficult to express, but
I think the right kind of girl and the right kind of
fellow can be almost anything to each other, if you
know what I mean?”
“I think,” said Livvy, “you put it rather wonderfully.”
She suddenly waved her racquet. “Ah—there’s
Lois!”
Lois came down the shrubbery path from the
garden startled, as if at her own great speed, flushed
and visibly breathless. A pink unbuttoned cardigan
slipped away at the shoulders, she had a hand in
both the pockets to keep it on. Her hat flapped
back, it rose above her face in surprise, like a
wave. Behind her the bushes stirred in an almost
visible backwash. Over the laurels, cropped knee-high
at the back of the tennis court, her body rose
and dipped with her long steps.
“Ah, here she is!” exclaimed several people, and
all looked up the bank uncritically and kindly.
The dark air of the shrubbery glittered with midges;
she jerked her hands from her pockets and waved
her way through. Chinks of sunlight darted up
her like mice and hesitated away like butterflies.
She had been looking down at the party, deployed
in all its promise, with greed and eagerness as at a
box of chocolates; eyes like a thumb and finger
hovering to selection. Now, engaged by its look,
she became all profile; her step flattened, she would
have liked to crawl. She was, as Mr. Montmorency
had noticed, very self-conscious.
The Hartigans said to Gerald: “Here comes
Lois; isn’t she very sweet-looking!” They smiled
at each other across him.
He said “Rather!” pocketing their tribute gratefully,
with simplicity, as a small boy pockets a tip.
His directness baffled them, they were shocked—but
he thought how nice they were. In his world
affections were rare and square—four-square—occurring
like houses in a landscape, unrelated and
positive, though with sometimes a large bright
looming—as of the sunned west face of Danielstown
over the tennis courts. He did not conceive of
love as a nervous interchange but as something
absolute, out of the scope of thought, beyond himself,
matter for a confident outward rather than
anxious inward looking. He had sought and was
satisfied with a few—he thought final—repositories
for his emotions: his mother, country, dog, school,
a friend or two, now—crowningly—Lois. Of
these he asked only that they should be quiet and
positive, not impinged upon, not breaking boundaries
from their generous allotment. His life was a
succession of practical adjustments, into which the
factor of personality did not enter at all. His
reserve—to which one was apt to accord a too
sensitive reverence—was an affair of convenience
rather than protection. Pressed for a statement,
he could have said, “I love her,” to the Hartigans,
Mrs. Carey, anyone there, without uneasiness,
without a sense of the words’ vibrations or alarm at
a loud impact on something hollow. So he looked up
the bank at Lois, while the Hartigans watched him.
Mr. Montmorency sat on the ground with his
knees apart, holding his ankles limply. His grey
flannel coat-collar was turned up over his white
shirt, as though a strong wind were blowing. He
was being talked to by ladies who sat above him on
high green chairs, and though he looked up to
answer, it was never higher than their knees. He
had more than ever his waxen blinking look, as
though exposed unnaturally to the sunshine. His
nostrils contracted slightly, as though the smell
drawn up from the roots of the grass in a perpetual
hot shimmer were more offensive than he cared to
explain. He was to play in the next set, and
Laurence looked forward to a melancholy exhibition
of departed proficiency. A wiry tenseness and
setting of teeth there would be, Laurence anticipated,
then balls going straight and cleanly into the
net. He would be the magnificent player of ten
years ago, with little painful grunts as point after
point was given away. Laurence guessed that Mr.
Montmorency hated parties and conversation as
much as he himself did, but being less adept at
evasion or honouring less fiercely the virginity of
his intelligence, could not escape from talking and
being talked to.
Laurence achieved this escape by sitting always
with a social alert expression between two groups,
when one tried to claim him he could affect to be
engaged by the other.
A net had been carefully stretched behind the
seats to prevent balls going through to the shrubbery.
But it was full of rents, and these the balls,
driven with force from the further back line, discovered
unerringly. To meet these deficiencies
children up from the lodge were on duty in the
shrubbery; they stared and rambled, pushing among
the laurels. They got their teas, an excellent view
of the party and a halfpenny for every ball they
recovered. Those who did not find any balls and
seemed disappointed were given halfpennies also.
So why, as Lady Naylor said, bother? She hated
to see her guests go round the net, smearing their
nice white flannels.
But now, as three balls in succession fled through
the leaves, she broke off a conversation and cried:
This was too much! Would some kind person—she
looked at Laurence—go round and help?
He rose, reluctant: simultaneously Mr. Montmorency
went gratefully round the net at the other
end. He was followed by an anxious little boy
called Hercules, the only child among the guests and
gravely de trop. They all three met in the middle.
Laurence said—beating the bushes vaguely—“Imagine,
sir, a small resurrection day, an intimate
thing-y one, when the woods should give up their
tennis balls and the bundles of hay their needles:
the beaches all their engagement rings and the
rivers their cigarette cases and some watches. The
sea’s too general, an affair of furniture and large
boilers, it could wait with the graves for the big
day.... Yes, Hercules, that is a tennis ball, but
it is pre-war. Put it back in the rabbit hole for the
children to find; it is worth a halfpenny to them....
Last term I dropped a cigarette case into the Cher,
from the bridge at Parson’s Pleasure. It was a
gold one, left over from an uncle, flat and thin
and curved, for a not excessive smoker. It was from
the days when they wore opera cloaks and mashed,
and killed ladies. It was very period, very virginal;
I called it Henry James; I loved it. I want
to see it rush up out of the Cher, very pale, with
eyeballs, like in the Tate Gallery. It wants a
woman to be interested in a day like that, to organize;
perhaps the Virgin Mary? Don’t you think, sir?”
Mr. Montmorency, startled at this address,
replied: “I have never been to the Tate Gallery.”
“Talking of being virginal, do you ever notice
this country? Doesn’t sex seem irrelevant?”
“There certainly are a great many unmarried
women,” said Mr. Montmorency, looking doubtfully
through the net at the Miss Hartigans.
“It is: ‘Ah, why would we?’ And indeed why
should they? There is no reason why one should
not, so one never does. It applies to everything.
And children seem in every sense of the word to be
inconceivable.”
“My mother has five,” said Hercules, “I am the
youngest. Hercules is a family name because I
am the only boy, but when I go to school I shall
be called Richard after my godfather, as everybody
says that Hercules even as an initial would
be such a disadvantage to me, though not nearly
so bad as being afraid of bats.”
“I wonder you aren’t at school now,” said Mr.
Montmorency.
“It would be holidays now anyhow, so I should
be bound to be here. That is my eldest sister,
playing tennis. They do not see how I can possibly
go to school till I have got over being afraid of
bats. Besides, I am using up the end of my sisters’
governess.”
“Nobody could possibly be sorrier for you than
I am, Hercules,” said Laurence. “This is an
unreal party.”
“Well, nobody brought you, I suppose,” said
Hercules.
The strong and dreadful smell of laurels made
them all irritable. Hercules tore off the tips of
bland leaves which kept slapping against his forehead.
Laurence came with a ball on his racquet
to Mr. Montmorency and said: “I am sure this is
one that you lost with Uncle Richard and poor
John Trent and the man who did not go to Ceylon
in the summer of ’06.”
“Whereas, I did not go to Canada.”
“No, you never did, did you?”
Lady Naylor came and looked at them through
the netting. “If between you you cannot find
any balls,” she said, “Laurence, you had
better please fetch that other box from the back
hall. They are beginning a new set with only
three.”
“I have two here that seem quite clean, but
they haven’t much bounce,” said Hercules.
“Oh, that is splendid, you are a good little boy!”
She took the balls from him through a hole. “Here
are a nice lot to go on with,” she called out hopefully,
rolling them to the court. Mr. Montmorency
and Laurence went on searching.
“Now take Aunt Myra; what does she think she’s
doing?”
“If it comes to that,” said Mr. Montmorency,
nettled, “what do you think you’re doing? Why
are you here at all if you don’t like it—as Hercules
said? I was happy here at your age, I was full of
the place, I asked nothing better. I ask nothing
better now.”
“Oh,” said Laurence.
“However, I have no doubt you are right in
being dissatisfied; I dare say it is progress,” said
Mr. Montmorency angrily. “I dare say it is good
for the race.”
Laurence, who did not consider that he had
anything to do with the race, replied with some
indignation: “I have no money; where do you
expect me to get any money from? I was to have
gone to Spain this month with a man and last year
I should have gone to Italy with another man, but
what do you expect me to go on? I have to eat
somwhere, don’t I, and here it is simply a matter of
family feeling.”
“This is one of the balls; I shall throw it over....
I had no idea that you were such a materialist.”
“I can’t help my stomach. Besides, I like
eating, it is so real. But I should like something
else to happen, some crude intrusion of the actual.
I feel all gassy inside from yawning. I should like
to be here when this house burns.”
“Quite impossible; quite unthinkable. Why
don’t you fish or something?... Nonsense!” he
added, looking warningly at the house.
“Of course it will, though. And we shall all
be so careful not to notice.”
“Are you the undergraduate of to-day?”
“I should love to be quite, quite abstract.”
Mr. Montmorency, offended by all this clever
conversation, felt more than ever his isolation,
his homelessness. Life was to him an affair of
discomfort, but that discomfort should be made
articulate seemed to him shocking. The over-fine
machinery of his mind ceaselessly strained and
caught and was agonizingly jerked over details.
His refuge was manly talk: he suspected Laurence.
He said: “You are fortunate. There was never
a time when I had not other people to think about.”
Laurence, who immediately thought this womanish,
said: “Oh yes, love.” He flicked out and
studied the word indifferently—coin of uncertain
value.
“Not entirely. One had a certain debt ...”
“Oh, yes, yes.”
Laurence became more formal, very much better
mannered. He recalled that the man was
married, had given away his integrity, had not
even a bed to himself. The husband, glancing a
last time through and under the bushes, was
negligible, diffused even a certain staleness. Laurence
sheered away mentally, moved further off
through the shrubbery. He had been talking
foolishly, in his vein of the third or fourth quality,
and regretted now having talked still. He felt
there had been something morbid about his intrusion,
as in a visit to a prison.
“I was to have played in that second set,” said
Mr. Montmorency. “It seems to be nearly over:
perhaps I shall play in the third.”
“Tea will be coming, never forget tea.” Indeed,
a move was being made to the house already. Tea
was too grave an affair to be carried out; besides,
one wasn’t accustomed to stability in the weather.
“Oh, Hugo, come out now, dear,” cried Francie,
walking past with Mrs. Hartigan. “I am sure it
doesn’t matter about the balls. And the Trents
have come—don’t you see them? We are just
going back to the house to meet them now.”
“Archie? Splendid!” He burst from the shrubbery
at the other side, gained the path and hurried
towards the house. At a turn of the path, in an
arch cut under some holly, he saw Gerald and Lois
standing; talking, looking down earnestly at their
racquets. With her head bent, Lois was like her
mother. He stared, then passed them quickly.
But Lois did not notice him going by. She was
saying: “I feel certain you have illusions about me;
I don’t believe you know what I’m like a bit.”
And while she spoke she counted the crimson
strings in her racquet: three down, six across.
VI
MRS. VERMONT ate more hot cakes than
she cared to remember, because they
were so good and nobody seemed to
notice. She went on to chocolate cake, then to
orange layer cake, to which she returned again
and again. An idea she had had, that one should
not eat very much when invited out, languished;
she finished up with a plate of raspberries. She
put all thought of her figure resolutely behind her.
Mother, of course, had filled out terribly, but oneself
mightn’t.
“Nummy-nummy,” she said, pointing out the
raspberries to David Armstrong who sat beside her.
“David have some!”
Livvy Thompson, sitting beyond David, deplored
these women who talked baby-talk. She felt that
her own appeal to men was more serious. “Mr.
Armstrong has got to play in the next set,” she said
warningly.
“Hoity-toity!” thought Betty Vermont (she never
used the expression aloud, as she was not certain
how one pronounced it: it was one of her inner
luxuries). Turning to Mrs. Carey (the Honourable
Mrs. Carey), who sat on her other side, she
said frankly:
“Your scrumptious Irish teas make a perfect
piggy-wig of me. And dining-room tea, of course,
makes me a kiddy again.”
“Does it really?” said Mrs. Carey, and helped
herself placidly to another slice of the chocolate
cake. She thought of Mrs. Vermont as “a little
person” and feared she detected in her a tendency,
common to most English people, to talk about her
inside. She often wondered if the War had not
made everybody from England a little commoner.
She added pleasantly: “This chocolate cake is a
speciality of Danielstown’s. I believe it’s a charm
that they make it by, not a recipe.”
“Things do run in families, don’t they? Now
I am sure you’ve all got ghosts.”
“I can’t think of any,” said Mrs. Carey, accepting
another cup of tea. She smiled and nodded
across the table to Mrs. Archie Trent, who had
just come in. “We have been much more worried
lately by people taking away our car. Of course
it is always brought back again, but one doesn’t
like to think of its being used for nefarious purposes.
That is the worst of a Ford.”
Mrs. Vermont opened her mouth to tell Mrs.
Carey the latest Ford story, then checked herself
because in Ireland they seemed to take Fords so
seriously. She observed instead: “All this is terrible
for you all, isn’t it? I do think you’re so
sporting the way you just stay where you are and
keep going on. Who would ever have thought the
Irish would turn out so disloyal—I mean, of course,
the lower classes! I remember Mother saying in
1916—you know, when that dreadful rebellion
broke out—she said: ‘This has been a shock to me,
I never shall feel the same about the Irish again.’
You see, she had brought us all up as kiddies to be
so keen on the Irish, and Irish songs. I still have
a little bog-oak pig she brought me back from an
exhibition. She always said they were the most
humorous people in the world, and with hearts of
gold. Though of course we had none of us ever
been in Ireland.”
“Well, I hope you are pleased with us now you
have come,” said Mrs. Carey hospitably. “I
expect you have all been enjoying this lovely
weather?”
“Oh, well—you see, we didn’t come over to
enjoy ourselves, did we? We came to take care of
all of you—and, of course, we are ever so glad to be
able to do it. Not that I don’t like the country;
it’s so picturesque with those darling mountains
and the hens running in and out of the cottages
just the way Mother always said. But, you see, one
can’t help worrying all the time about Timmie—my
husband—and all the boys: out all night sometimes
with the patrols or else off in the mountains.”
“Terrible. And do you find this a tiring
climate?”
A word attracted Mrs. Trent’s attention across
the table. “Terrible what?” she said. “Terrible
who?” She was youngish, brusque and dominant;
the high pink colour over her face as from riding
hard in a wind gave her a look of zestfulness alarming
to Mrs. Vermont. “I shouldn’t worry,” she
said to Mrs. Vermont.
Mrs. Vermont replied with a shade of asperity
that it was they who were in a position to worry and
therefore must not. “’Cause we’re here to take
care of you!” The remark, caught in a momentary
silence around the table, was received with civility
and attention. “That’s splendid!” said Mrs. Trent
heartily. She got up, having finished her tea
rapidly and went to smoke outside. Her husband
was M.F.H. and really, thought Mrs. Vermont,
they did not seem to worry about anything but wire.
Mrs. Vermont turned for support to David; his
ears were scarlet, he rapidly stirred his tea.
Five days ago, an R.I.C. barracks at Ballydrum
had been attacked and burnt out after a long defence.
Two of the defenders were burnt inside it, the others
shot coming out. The wires were cut, the roads
blocked; there had been no one to send for help,
so there was no help for them. It was this they
had all been discussing, at tea, between tennis:
“the horrible thing.” No one could quite understand
why Captain Vermont and the subalterns did
not seem more appalled and interested. It was
not apparent how the subject rasped on their sensibilities.
These things happened, were deplored
and accepted, and still no one seemed to look on
David or Gerald, Smith, Carmichael or Mrs. Vermont’s
Timmie as a possible remedy. Here they
all were, playing tennis, and every one seemed
delighted. “If they’d just let us out for a week—”
felt the young men. David could not look up as
he stirred his tea. What was the good of them?
This, he felt, every one should be wondering. But
the party would indeed have been dull without
them, there would have been no young men.
Nobody wished them elsewhere.
Lois had been worrying chiefly because Gerald
had illusions about her, also, as to whether Aunt
Myra noticed the raspberries still would not go
round. The guests for which she was responsible
were not only unexpected but ravenous. And
while she sat watching Aunt Myra, Gerald sat
watching herself as though she were an entirely
different person, not the sort of person one could
describe at all. After tea she played on the upper
court with Captain Vermont, against Gerald and
Nona Carey. She played well, all her strokes came
off; it seemed that worry agreed with her. It
could not agree with Gerald, who played badly.
Then it occurred to her: he was not worried; she
had not the power to worry him. Some idea he
had formed of herself remained inaccessible to her;
she could not affect it.
By now the upper court was in shadow, they all
flickered against the dark screen of the trees like
figures cut out of light green velvet. Below, where
hot bands of light still blinded the players, there
was a suggestion of strain and violence. Whenever
she looked down, Mr. Montmorency seemed to be
handing balls to his partner in silent anger. She
guessed it must be himself who was playing badly,
so that while she could not resist looking down,
she had to keep looking away from him just as fast.
“You were splendid,” said Captain Vermont
when their set finished.
“Oh no, I wasn’t,” said Lois by reflex action,
and wished all the other things to which she was
always replying, “Oh no, I didn’t,” or “Oh no,
I’m not,” were half as true. And she thought
what a pity it was that Mr. Montmorency, instead
of exerting himself so fruitlessly, had not been
sitting there at the edge of the court to watch her.
She walked down the slope from the court with
Gerald beside her. Conscious of many people’s
attention, she did not know if she seemed enviable
or foolish. “I wish you wouldn’t keep looking so
pleased the whole time,” she said to Gerald.
“Oh?... but I am.”
“What at?”
“Well, I love coming over here. I think you
have such awfully nice parties.”
“Oh, the party.... But David enjoys them,
and he hasn’t got the same expression as you have.
In fact, he looks rather sick. What can be the
matter?”
“Well, we all feel a little rotten about that
barrack.”
“Don’t! Do you know that while that was going
on, eight miles off, I was cutting a dress out, a
voile that I didn’t even need, and playing the
gramophone?... How is it that in this country
that ought to be full of such violent realness, there
seems nothing for me but clothes and what people
say? I might just as well be in some kind of
cocoon.”
“But what could you have done? You, you—”
“I might at least have felt something.”
“But you do; you’ve got the most wonderful
power of feeling.”
“But you never take in a word I say. You’re
not interested when I tell you about myself.”
“You know I could listen all day to you talking.”
She thought: “As though you could make me
talk all day!” To cover the thought she said
earnestly:
“You think we don’t all understand your not
being there in time and not doing anything afterwards?
We’re not all such idiots. We know it’s
most terribly difficult for you and that you must
obey orders. It’s bad luck the orders are silly.
It’s all this dreadful idea about self-control. When
we do nothing it is out of politeness, but England
is so moral, so dreadfully keen on not losing her
temper, or being for half a moment not a great deal
more noble than anyone else. Can you wonder
this country gets irritated? It’s as bad for it as
being a woman. I never can see why women
shouldn’t be hit, or should be saved from wrecks
when everybody complains they’re superfluous.”
“You don’t understand: it would be ghastly if
those things went.”
“Why? I don’t see—and I am a woman.”
Which was, of course, exactly why it wasn’t to
be expected or desired she should understand. He
smiled, too happy to answer, and tore out a handful
of leaves from the privet hedge. She had this
one limitation, his darling Lois; she couldn’t look
on her own eyes, had no idea what she was, resented
almost his attention being so constantly fixed on
something she wasn’t aware of. A fellow did not
expect to be to a girl what a girl was to a fellow—this
wasn’t modesty, specially, it was an affair of
function—so that the girl must be excused for a
possible failure in harmony, a sometimes discordant
irreverence. When he said: “You will never know
what you mean to me,” he made plain his belief
in her perfection as a woman. She wasn’t made
to know, she was not fit for it. She was his integrity,
of which he might speak to strangers but of
which to her he would never speak.
He tore out another handful of leaves from the
hedge and scattered them carefully over the grass.
They both laughed.
She was thinking: “When next I write to Viola,
can I describe him?” Viola flashed off her men in
a phrase, with a sweep of her red quill pen. The
red pen had leaned from the Chinese inkpot, against
the window, like a thin flame, a leaning flamingo
on that day’s sunny mist in the Westminster street.
It remained a picture of their intercourse. They
had said good-bye in December, a slight day,
anxious between the enormous past and future.
The parting was hardly real, they had barely kissed.
They were impatient, nervous, waiting for the curtain
to rise. They had just left school.
They had left school the day before. Yet the
new life had been impatient for Viola, drawing
her away from Lois in the taxi, appropriating her
with certainty. She had stepped from their taxi
toppling with school trunks with a kind of solemnity,
as on to a carpet stretched for her festal approach
from the kerb to the doors of her home. Next
day, when they said good-bye, her hair was in place
already, woven into her personality. Her pigtail
had been the one loose end there was of her, an
extension of her that had independence, a puppyish
walloping thing with nerves of its own. Now the
hair was woven in bright sleek circles over her ears,
each strand round like an eel’s body. The effect
completed her; Lois knew she had been missing
or else discounting something all these years.
Viola must have played at being a schoolgirl just
as Lois would have to play at being a woman.
Two expensive young men’s photographs had risen
like suns on her mantelpiece; these young men had
loved since last Easter holidays; their position was
now regularized magically by the putting up of
Viola’s hair. For only little commonalities, she
declared, had affairs while still at school. And
Lois, after that good-bye so distinct and distant,
as at the little end of a telescope, had left her with
the composed, knowing photographs and the red
pen leaning against the sunshine. She had wondered,
going out to a day of shopping and the night
mail to be caught at Euston, whether life was to
hold for her, too, a man’s passion; and if so, when?
And she had bought a dozen pairs of silk stockings
and the black georgette Aunt Myra said was
“old.”
But a man’s passion was not at all the thing. My
dear, too Dell-ish! Viola went to what she supposed
one would call her first ball; in tulle she went,
smoke blue, with a close gold-leaf round the hair—not
bright gold, dull gold. Various people had
seemed intrigued, were in fact intrigued rather
definitely. There was So-and-so, an absurd person
(flash of the red pen), and the aloof, rather mask-like
So-and-so—who might intrigue Lois. But when
it came to So-and-so (a most brilliant flash of the pen)
Viola would admit to Lois she was affected: it really
had been affecting. But enough of Viola. “Now,
Lois darling, you must tell me about them all:
I must know everybody.”
And there arose, recurrently, the difficulty in
describing Gerald. Who else had been intrigued,
Lois was not certain. How much was somebody
intrigued when they wished to sit out in a car in the
barrack square for four dances? Might not Viola
consider sitting out in a car at all rather Dell-ish?
When some one tried to kiss you with whisky-ish
breath, how much were they intrigued and how
much was whisky? She thought a major proposed
to her, though he seemed rather old, but he was
so much confused and had such a mumbly moustache
she could not be certain. And later on at the
Clonmore Club a lady was pointed out to her as,
she was almost certain, that major’s wife. David
had seemed intrigued, but then he himself intrigued
Livvy so very definitely and did not a young
man under these conditions become slightly sordid?
So Lois became so very general in her references
that Viola was suspicious: she asked, was there really
anyone? Then she began to write in a married-womanish
tone of encouragement, which considering
she could be married at any moment was
really justified. Lois was forced to state, there was
a man in the Rutlands, a Gerald Lesworth, whom
she found affecting. She supposed there was no
question as to his being intrigued; people seemed
to notice. So Viola wrote back, she must hear all
about him, should have heard before: her Lol was
really the final Sphinx. She wanted to know, to
see, to hear him, even to smell him—because all
the nicest men did smell, didn’t they, indefinably
but divinely. One noticed it when one was
dancing or, sometimes, sitting out. So now, please,
everything; by return.
Viola did not like moustaches, but some men did
qualify their moustaches, surely? Gerald’s lay
like a fine dark shadow, so that his lip seemed
to curl up more than it did. It answered his eyebrows
somehow—that had a way of drawing together
while he spoke—and some soft edgeless
darkness about his eyes. If one mentioned his
teeth so white that his smile seemed a long slow
flash in the tanned face, didn’t it make him sound
like Fairbanks? For he was not, at all. He had a
way of looking down while he spoke, as though his
thoughts were under his eyelids. From his look
she had sometimes turned in impatience, never in
discomfort. There was emotion there unclothed in
the demi-decency of thought; nakedness, not a
suggestive deshabille. If he was looking away
and one spoke, his eyes returned with an extraordinary
look of welcome. He had a good chin,
cut sharply away underneath with a strong shadow.
His head was pleasant with bumps, that made
planes of light and shadow over his polished hair.
And she knew she liked something about the back
of his neck: it was a personal neck—not just a
connection, an isthmus—with skin fitting closely
over the muscles.
As she stood looking at Gerald by the privet
hedge, he emerged from the mist of familiarity,
clear to her mental eye. She saw him as though
for the first time, with a quick response to his beauty;
she saw him as though he were dead, as though she
had lost him, with the pang of an evocation. While
she could hold him thus—before he receded or came
too closely forward—she wanted to run indoors and
write to Viola. Viola would be certain to tell her
she loved him, and by that declaration, to be
expressed with vigour, Lois was too certain to be
affected. She was afraid at the thought of it.
She would have loved to love him; she felt some
kind of wistfulness, some deprivation. If there
could only be some change, some movement—in
her, outside of her, somewhere between them—some
incalculable shifting of perspectives that would
bring him wholly into focus, mind and spirit, as
she had been bodily in focus now—she could love
him. Something must be transmuted.... Or
else, possibly, if he would not love her so, could
give her air to grow in, not stifle imagination.
He said: “What’s the matter? Bothered?”
“Thinking—about you, in a kind of way.”
“Good.”
“I was describing you. How would you describe
me?”
He was surprised, he needed time to think of
this; he did not know. “I must just go in,” she
said—“do you mind?—and write a letter. It’s
so important. Will you post it for me at Clonmore?”
But meanwhile, they had been irritating Lady
Naylor, who seeing Lois stand so vaguely down
by the privet hedge, disclaiming implicitly the
party given for her amusement, was goaded to the
point of an interruption. Now she called: “Lois—Lois!”
Lois sighed and went to her.
“I want you to take the Trents and Maguires
and Boatleys round the garden,” she said as her
niece approached. “I shall be coming later”—she
murmured: “when some more of the people
have gone. Mrs. Trent wants a cutting of the
allspice and would like to see if there’s anything
else she would like. Tell Donovan.” She murmured
again: “And don’t let Mrs. Boatley get with
Mrs. Maguire, she is a Christian Scientist and
will talk of it, and you know the Maguires’ little
nephew died of that. And if the Boatleys like the
peaches give them some; let Donovan pack them.”
She added in a still lower tone of reproach: “Because
I don’t believe there were raspberries for them at
tea.”
VII
FRANCIE was finding Laurence not so difficult
after all, if one just ran on quite naturally.
They sat at the top of the steps together,
after everybody had gone. The fields looked wider,
the sky more gracious and distant seen through the
clearing smoke of social activity. The Trents left
last but one, the Hartigans and their aunt Mrs.
Foxe-O’Connor had just gone jogging away up the
avenue, knee to knee in their little trap. The
gravel at the foot of the steps was all scored up and
flung into spirals by the turning of wheels. Early
to-morrow, there would be a busy sound of gardeners
raking it smooth again. At present, there
was the busy sound of rooks: it heightened Mrs.
Montmorency’s and Laurence’s peaceful lassitude
to reflect that rooks still had to talk, to flock and
mix in intricate sociability. Men and women had,
since seven o’clock, been released from this obligation.
There was nothing to say, they did not have to
say anything: they exclaimed their thoughts casually,
not answering one another’s, on the retreat
towards silence. All the afternoon they had been
asking questions, and ignoring the answers as far
as possible. Laurence knew he could not be asked
by his aunt to bring the chairs in or see whether
Lois had locked up the garden while he sat here,
so apparently entertaining Mrs. Montmorency.
Francie had not wanted to know how anyone
was; health played too large a part in her life already.
She had not wanted to know if they thought
the garden lovely—the supremacy of Danielstown
garden made opinion irrelevant—whether they preferred
winter to summer because of the hunting, or
summer to winter because of the tennis. Neither
had it seemed to Laurence important whether anyone
wanted more tea or had had really enough,
whether they feared to be driven into the ditch by
Black and Tans on the way home, or whether they
knew Oxford. They both felt themselves coming
to life again slowly, now that the party was over, and
putting off a sort of antagonism. At an upstairs
window they could hear Lady Naylor and Lois discussing
the guests, agreeing that it had been a
successful day.
Francie said: “I do wonder now whether this
weather will last.” This gold weather had all the
delights of a new perception, it made Danielstown
real as a memory.
“I suppose they don’t really feel like that inside,”
said Laurence.
“I wonder at them bringing a child like Hercules.
I found him walking about the house when I went
up for my air-cushion. The poor little fellow ...
I let him blow up my air-cushion and then I took
him and showed him photographs of the Carnival
that I brought back from Nice. We talked quite
a time; he tells me he is afraid of bats. I wonder
now why they called him Hercules.”
“Wouldn’t it be terrible to be in the Army ...”
“Isn’t that young Mr. Lesworth devoted to Lois?
I wonder does she feel it at all?”
“I always wonder what one does in the Army
when one’s not doing something particular, very
particularly.”
“I wonder if they would marry?”
“Marry?” said Laurence, surprised into attention.
“I don’t see why. Though I don’t see why not.
As Lois never does anything or seems to want to, I
suppose she must be expecting to marry some one.
And Lesworth is pleasant, I think, and rather
pretty. He is like a photograph of a man in an
advertisement putting on the right kind of collar.
Doesn’t advertising develop—I sometimes wonder
if one might not think of taking it up.”
“But doesn’t she draw very nicely?”
“Well, she could draw people in the Army doing
things, like Lady Butler.”
“She is so sweet, I think; I love to watch her.”
“Her consumption of tennis is something enormous.
There’s tennis to-morrow at Castle Trent and
I’ve got to drive her over. I often wonder whether
she really would get assaulted by Black and Tans if
she went alone, or by sinister patriots, or whether she
might not be old enough now to look after herself.”
“I’m afraid at her age,” said Francie, blushing;
“her age isn’t any protection.”
“I cannot imagine wanting to assault anybody.
But then I never can conceive of anybody else’s
mentality—or isn’t that mentality? Why is it so
much worse for a young girl to miss tennis than for
a young man to miss Spain? I suppose it is something
to do with the life force and that one must not
trace the connection.”
“I wonder why she’s so fond of that Livvy
Thompson—she seems to me managing.”
“She’s not fond—it’s contiguity. Why should
they chop up the rather beautiful name of Olivia
into something that sounds like cat’s meat?”
This Francie well understood, she herself did not
care to be called Frances, it sounded formal. She
sighed, and gathered together the folds of her grey-and-blue
“mottledy” foulard. She had been wondering—watching
Hugo so happy with Mrs. Trent,
and now the speculation recurred to her—whether
the woman Hugo had really needed would not have
worn coats and skirts, snapped her fingers at dogs
and recrossed her legs with decision. Mrs. Trent
was an amusing good sort; she so radiated the
quality that Francie, after a minute or two’s conversation,
had felt quite a good sort also. Was she,
though, perfectly understanding? But then did not
Hugo perhaps feel a little smothered in one’s own
understanding, a little reduced by it? For instance:
Francie thought, honestly, Hugo had played magnificently
this afternoon; several people had said to
her: “It’s a delight to see your husband play on these
courts again”; they would not have said that, surely,
if he had not been playing magnificently! But even
so armed, she would not be able to combat Hugo’s
conviction that his tennis was going off, because it
was something he never mentioned and he would be
furious at hearing it put into words. So still she
would have to feel his pride suffer—as though he
were growing old, when there wasn’t a shadow of
age on him. She remembered how he had shown
up to-day, playing, sitting or walking, among the
young men. She liked the young men, but they
seemed all limbs and faces, not yet related. She
wondered what Hugo had thought of the young
men.
She thought of their room upstairs with quiet light
in the ceiling; of ghostly roses that still showed
faintly when one drew the curtains over the daylight.
She supposed she ought to be lying down; she got
up, murmuring something, and went indoors.
Laurence stood up, vacillating. He wondered if
they would meet him and make him do things if he
were to venture up for his book.
Francie, crossing the ante-room, was waylaid by
Lady Naylor coming out of Lois’s room. “Ah,
there you are, Francie, good! Now I’m longing to
know what you thought of them all. To tell you
the truth, I am thankful it’s safely over. I hope
they enjoyed themselves really: they looked all right.”
“Indeed they must have! It was a great success.”
They sat down on two of the crimson chairs, stepping-stones
over a lake of floor, to discuss the party.
Francie declared how pleasant she had found Mrs.
Archie Trent, and how nice it had been to see Mrs.
Carey again, and how handsome Nona was growing
up. And what a pity it was, she said, about the
Hartigans; they had been grown-up girls when she
had seen them last, and it did seem hard! “And
oh,” she cried, in a glow of pleasure and sympathy,
“isn’t that young Mr. Lesworth very devoted?”
“Yes, he has charming manners; he comes over
here a good deal. He’s so helpful with chairs and
rugs: I do wish he were Laurence!”
“But so devoted to Lois—and really one can’t be
surprised. The way he follows her round with his
eyes—and his feet too—”
“Sssh!” exclaimed Lady Naylor. “She’s in her
room! I wouldn’t like her to pick up ideas like
Livvy’s. Are you sure, by the way, you’re not
thinking of Mr. Armstrong? There’s a very great
case of devotion there. He follows Lois and Livvy
follows him. I expect in the general confusion,
with so many people, you mixed up the young men.
They are all alike—it’s a pity, I always think. It’s
a pity, too, about Lois and Livvy; it isn’t a friendship
I like. But poor Livvy’s motherless and she’s
always riding over to meals, and of course Lois needs
girls of her own age. She made very nice friends
at her school in England, but it’s so unlucky, they’re
never allowed to come over. Something said in the
English press has apparently given rise to an idea
that this country’s unsafe. It’s unlucky for Lois.
I should never go by the papers about England....
No, Francie, if you didn’t mix up the young men, I
really don’t know what you mean.”
“Oh, it’s been very stupid of me,” cried Francie,
flushing with agitation. “Of course I should never
have said if I hadn’t thought—if I hadn’t been led
to think ... No, I see now that I oughtn’t to
have. But I thought from what every one said ...”
“But I am still quite in the dark, dear,” said Lady
Naylor, flushed also and smiling with irritation.
“I suppose, however, you must have gathered that
as I don’t understand what you do mean, what you
mean cannot really be so.”
“Oh, of course,” agreed Francie, ruffling the silk
on her lap with light, feathery touches. “All the
same, I do think you ought to know, Myra, that
every one said ...”
“One cannot help what people say, though it is
always annoying. Not that I ever do know what
they say: I make a point of not knowing. You
know how I’ve always turned my face against
gossip, especially these days: it’s annoying to hear
of it everywhere, even at one’s own parties. It’s
a very great danger, I think, to the life of this
country.”
“Well, but really, you couldn’t say this was
political. It seems to me natural that people should
take an interest—they’re all so fond of her. If
young Mr. Lesworth and Lois are really—”
Lady Naylor was forced into open country.
“Oh, is that it?” she exclaimed in enlightenment.
“But really, my dear Francie, what a fuss about
nothing! No, not you, dear; I never meant you
made the fuss, but really with all these hints:
‘People are saying,’ you might have meant almost
anything. One’s friends do excel themselves,
really! Just because they’ve played tennis together
and danced once or twice! Really, you would think
they wanted one to divide one’s tennis parties up
like a Quaker meeting, and turn ballrooms into that
horrible kind of country dancing they have in
England—Anna Partridge’s people do it—women
hopping one way, waving things, men all hopping
the other way, stamping. ‘Really,’ as I said to Anna
Partridge, ‘if this is what you call getting in touch
with the people, give me what you call feudalism!’”
“Yes. But really, Myra, is it so very improbable?
They’re both so young, and so—”
“Why yes, of course; exactly!” Lady Naylor sat
up in her chair with a heightening of colour, an
incisive gesture; her eyes threatened a falcon-swoop
on her friend’s rash flank. “Ex-actly! Which is
one of the many things that do make it so impossible.”
“I said ‘Improbable!’” Francie spoke with a
funny zest. She hated arguments as she hated
rain; once caught in the rain she could hear it
crashing on her umbrella, feel it spill on her shoulders
with exhilaration. She knew so little excitement.
She now felt for the first time Myra’s equal
in vigour and personality; she felt this opposition
to Myra must at last increase their confidence in
each other.
“In the first place,” said Lady Naylor, “he’s a
subaltern. Subalterns can’t marry—not of course
that they’re like priests, but they might just as well
be until they are captains and thirty. Colonel
Boatley feels very strongly ... Of course, he’s a
thoroughly nice boy, so much liked in the Regiment.
But then, what are the Rutlands nowadays? Of
course they did magnificently in the War. But
now they seem to be full of people like that extraordinary
little Mrs. Vermont, who turned up perfectly
pleased with herself this afternoon, in spite of
Lois’s having quite forgotten that she’d asked her.
No, he of course is charming, but he seems to have no
relations. One cannot trace him. His mother, he
says, lives in Surrey, and of course you do know,
don’t you, what Surrey is. It says nothing, absolutely;
part of it is opposite the Thames Embankment.
Practically nobody who lives in Surrey ever
seems to have been heard of, and if one does hear
of them they have never heard of anybody else who
lives in Surrey. Really altogether, I think all
English people very difficult to trace. They are so
pleasant and civil, but I do often wonder if they are
not a little shallow: for no reason at all they will
pack up everything and move across six counties....
Of course, I don’t say Gerald Lesworth’s
people are in trade—I should never say a thing like
that without foundation. Besides, if they were in
trade there would be money, money on English
people shows so much and he quite evidently hasn’t
any. No, I should say they were just villa-ry.”
“But there are so many villas in England,” said
Francie, “that some of the people who live in them
are bound to be nice. I often think so, looking out
of the train.”
“Very nice in their way, I am sure—but that’s not
the immediate point, dear. There is no question at
all—you understand?—of anything between Mr.
Lesworth and Lois. And of course naturally they
haven’t thought of it—if they had, don’t you see,
they’d be much more careful to make it appear there
wasn’t. Of course I agree that Lois ought to be
more careful. I was careful at her age; I was careful
by instinct, which is a thing that girls nowadays
seem to lack. There seems nothing to do between
putting ideas in a girl’s head and letting her behave
like an absolute donkey. It is all very difficult,
really. If she were my own niece I should speak to
her—I should certainly speak to Laurence if he were
going on like that—but as she’s Richard’s niece I
don’t very well see that I can. There’s so little to
go on. And I really cannot have Richard bothered,
it makes him so difficult. When he feels he ought
to do something and isn’t sure what, there’s no
saying at all what he may do. One does dislike
awkwardness. And it doesn’t seem kind to ask the
young man his intentions when if he should have any
they would have to be quashed immediately....
No, one must leave it at this. I rely on you,
Francie, to contradict any more of this gossip that
comes your way, and you might ask Hugo to also—if
he has heard any— Perhaps on the whole
better not put the idea into his head; he might forget
and discuss it with Richard.... Meanwhile, I
shall talk to Lois seriously about her future. She
draws very nicely; I often think that she might take
that up. I must tell her to show you and Hugo
some of her drawings.”
“But I don’t know anything about drawing.”
“Oh, all she needs is a little encouragement.”
“Just one thing, Myra—I think you’re so wise,
you’re so perfectly right, as you know. I do always
in general believe in letting things like this take
their course. But ... as this thing can’t have a
course, really mustn’t: is it quite fair to the young
man? Because Lois is so very—”
Here she broke off, scared by a terrible clatter in
Lois’s room. A pail had been kicked and some
furniture violently shifted.
“Oh, Francie!” exclaimed Lady Naylor reproachfully.
“You ought to remember she’s there!
One can’t be too careful! In fact, if you don’t
mind, I expect we had better not talk any more.
You must go and lie down—you’re looking as fresh
as a rose, but I know how Hugo insists upon it.”
They got up, she took Francie’s arm and led her
as far as her door. Francie felt like something
being put back in its box. Lady Naylor went
down, calling, to look for Laurence and ask him to
bring the chairs in and lock up the garden.
For Lois, this had all been exceedingly difficult.
There she was, caught in her bedroom, she had not
the face to come out. The door went paper-thin
as they raised their voices. At first it had seemed
all right: Aunt Myra knew she was in here, having
just left her. But soon their tones changed, a keen
hunting note came into them; they were on a topic.
Carried away, Aunt Myra had forgotten. She
heard “Lois ... Lois ... Lois ...” She hummed
and sang: they were too intent. To one’s sense of
honour such things were agonizing. She leaned
right out of a window into the cooling air, into the
hush of limes on the avenue; she watched Uncle
Richard and Mr. Montmorency walk to the white
gate. Their heads nodded down from their shoulders
like old men’s, happily; they spoke of Archie
and Mrs. Archie and poor John. But from the
room behind the other voices, flooding in through
the door, came after her. She flung herself on her
bed with a squawk from the springs and pressed her
ear shut till the lobes and her finger-tips ached:
also she pulled the pillows over her head. It was
hot thus and still the voices penetrated. They
came on steadily, like the Hound of Heaven. It
was hard, really, the way they both kept at it.
The voices spoke of love: they were full of protest.
Love, she had learnt to assume, was the mainspring
of woman’s grievances. Illnesses all arose
from it, the having of children, the illnesses children
had; servants also, since the regular practice of love
involved a home; by money it was confined, propped
and moulded. Lois flung off the pillows and
walked round the room quickly. She was angry;
she strained to hear now, she quite frankly listened.
But when Mrs. Montmorency came to: “Lois is
very—” she was afraid suddenly. She had a
panic. She didn’t want to know what she was, she
couldn’t bear to: knowledge of this would stop,
seal, finish one. Was she now to be clapped down
under an adjective, to crawl round lifelong inside
some quality like a fly in a tumbler? Mrs. Montmorency
should not!
She lifted her water jug and banged it down in the
basin: she kicked the slop-pail and pushed the
washstand about.... It was victory. Later on,
she noticed a crack in the basin, running between a
sheaf and a cornucopia: a harvest richness to which
she each day bent down her face. Every time,
before the water clouded, she would see the crack:
every time she would wonder: what Lois was—
She would never know.
VIII
SIR RICHARD, to whom the idea about
Lois and Gerald percolated in time through
the family conversation, declared the idea
was preposterous. What chiefly worried him was,
might she not have mentioned to Gerald those
guns in the lower plantations? He had charged
her not to, but she was just like Laura, poor Laura’s
own child in fact; she would talk and talk and
you never knew where you had her. He announced,
he had been thinking for some time
subalterns should be fewer and more infrequent.
He was delighted when he heard from the postman,
and was able to pass on, how three young women
in the Clonmore direction had had their hair cut off
by masked men for walking out with the soldiers.
And indeed they had got no sympathy from the
priest either, the postman said, for the priest knew
that English soldiers were most immoral.
“And how would you like it,” Sir Richard said
to his niece indignantly, “if a thing like that were
to happen to you?”
“I should be bobbed,” said Lois. “I should
take it as a sign. But I have never walked an
inch with anyone, not what you would call out,
Uncle Richard.”
“But masked men,” said Lady Naylor, “would
be a very nasty experience for a girl of your age.”
Lois said she would prefer the men to be masked;
she would be less embarrassed in the event of
meeting them afterwards.
“I wonder what they do with the hair,” she
added. She thought inwardly: “If they’re going
to take this attitude, I could not be blamed for
falling in love with a married man.” She searched
her heart anxiously. She wrote to Viola that she
feared she might be falling in love with a married
man. But when she looked at Mr. Montmorency
next morning at breakfast, and still more when she
had to drive him back from Mount Isabel, the idea
seemed shocking. She regretted having sent her
letter to post in such a hurry.
Scandalized by the memory, she drove home
briskly. On the bright sky, opposite, Mr. Montmorency’s
pale face hung like an apparition’s.
She took the curves of Mount Isabel drive with
a rattle: the trap swung on its axle, the traces
creaked. Beyond the gates, light lay flat and
yellow along the hedges where brambles showered;
hard red blackberries knocked on the spokes and
swung back, shining. She took the short way,
over a shoulder of mountain; the light-pink road
crunched under the wheels like sugar. Coming
up out from the lanes they bathed an hour or so
in the glare of space. Height had the quality
of depth: as they mounted they seemed to be
striking deeper into the large mild crystal of an
inverted sea. Out of the distance everywhere,
pointless and unrelated, space came like water
between them, slipping and widening. They
receded from one another into the vacancy. On
yellow furze-dust, light was hard and physical;
over parching heather shadow faded and folded
tone on tone, and was drawn to the sky on delicate
brittle peaks.
The road bent over a ridge, the trap ran down
on the pony’s rump; he and she shifted back on
their seats. They stared with unfocussed intensity
over each other’s shoulders. Gorse, they said,
was never out of bloom (he commented). Nor
kissing, they said (she supplied), out of season—yet
she supposed this untrue; she supposed that
they both sometimes must be. “And so much
bitterness,” he exclaimed, “over this empty
country!”
“What is it exactly,” she asked, “that they
mean by freedom? What does it affect? What
is it besides an excuse for war?”
“I suppose,” he said in his faint voice, as at
the pit of a yawn, “some kind of a final peace—stability.”
“Then to fight’s absurd; the more one keeps on,
the further from it one is. It’s a hopeless kind
of beginning.” She looked at him earnestly,
lucidly, like a puppy.
“You are very reasonable.... Do you read
the papers?”
“Well ... I do hate things that have just
happened.”
“—I don’t follow?”
“They’re so raw.”
The road was steep and the pony determined to
trot; it stumbled; she pulled it up sharply. She
was inclined to forget she was driving at all. He
started and put out a hand, to steady himself,
along the back of the seat. He hated things to
be done badly; he was old-maidish. They were
silent in a mutual criticism. As they came down
and the mountains, drawn behind, were once
more scenic, as hedges ran up at the sides of the
road, the illusion of distance between them faded;
they obtruded upon each other; a time when they
could have talked was gone. They might have
said, she felt now, anything; but what had remained
unsaid, never conceived in thought, would exercise
now a stronger compulsion upon their attitude.
She was to believe they had approached each
other in the unintimacy of silence. Shy with
retrospective emotion she fidgeted in the trap,
irked by his look, his manner, all his presence
physically. Whenever she stretched a foot it
touched his, always she seemed to be retreating,
apologizing, having to shift her position. When
she sat well forward to give her attention to driving,
their knees touched.
“This trap’s too small,” she said finally. Mr.
Montmorency—face dull on the bright sky—replied:
“Oh, I don’t know—it depends on how
one arranges oneself.” If he only would not
smile—but he smiled constrainedly. Next to
Laura, she was the most fidgety person from
whom he had suffered. But Laura’s unrepose
had been an irradiation, a quiver of personality.
She was indefinite definitely, like a tree shining,
shaking away outlines; a bay, a poplar in wind
and sunshine. Her impulses—those incalculable
springings-out of mind through the body—had
had, like movements of branches, a wild kind
of certainty. He had been half aware of some
kind of design in her being of which she was
unaware wholly.
Whereas, here still was Lois (now Laura’s tree
had fallen), twisted away from him on the opposite
seat of the trap, outraging tone in her pink jersey—a
shade or two nearer than Laura, perhaps, to
the accuracy passing for beauty. She looked
gênée, dispirited; some failure, no doubt, in his
company: he must be an old man to her. She
glanced back once or twice at the mountains,
from which a light peaty breath still came after
them down the descending road.
She laughed suddenly, parted the reins, and
jerking a rein in each hand, with wide elbows,
chirruped and clucked to the pony. “This,”
she said, “is how my governess used to drive.
She used to say it came natural because all her
people were horsey. She said her father had
been a colonel and she used to plait hats out of
crinkled paper and wear them. She loved my
mother embarrassingly, and she was always embroidering
things. My mother hated it—do you
remember?”
“I don’t remember your governess. Hated
what?”
“Being loved like that, and given embroidery.
Miss Part used to laugh and say, ‘I’m afraid I’m
terribly whimsical, Mrs. Farquar,’ and Mother
used to say, ‘Oh no, I don’t expect you are really’—was
it unkind?”
“Well, it sounds unkind.”
“I wonder if she would have liked being loved
at my age—do you remember?”
“I don’t suppose she had made up her mind.”
Lois turned and looked at him so intently that
he was uneasy suddenly: the bottom dropped out
of the past, spilling all its security. He would
never know how much Laura had said to her
daughter those last ten years—years locked away
from him: Lois had got the key. He said with
acidity: “If she and I had married—”
“Oh, yes....”
“My dear child, you wouldn’t be here.”
“Oh, but half of me would be. And I dare say,”
she said charmingly, “the other half of me would
have been much nicer.” The turning away of
her look was more confidential than any directness.
“Thank you—don’t run over the little pigs!”
Michael Connor’s farm first announced itself
by some pink little silky pigs running along the
roadside. A sow got up, like a very maternal
battleship. Connor children looked, shrieked, fell
from a gate and fled to the farmhouse, skirting
a pool of liquid manure in the front yard. It
was a nice farm, Lois pointed out, it had the door
and window-frames painted blue, the colour of
all the cart-wheels. The Connors were darling
people; she drove past slowly, leaning over the
side of the trap to see if the family were about.
The house was one story high, with a slate roof.
Mr. Montmorency sat frowning; he could not
remember if this were a Michael Connor he ought
to remember.
Michael Connor came out from a furze-thatched
shed at the side. He took off his wide straw hat
and shook hands with them both. His hand was
bony, nervous and dry as earth. “It’s a grand
evening,” said he with a melancholy smile.
“It is indeed. And how,” she asked, apprehensive,
“is Mrs. Connor?”
“Ah, the poor woman ... the poor woman!”
Michael looked away from them, nobody spoke.
Lois at last said: “Give her my love.”
“I will,” said Michael, “and proud she will be.
And yourself’s looking lovely, Miss Lois; a fine
strong lady, glory be to God.”
“You remember Mr. Montmorency?”
“Sure indeed I do!” exclaimed Michael, and
shook hands with Mr. Montmorency again with
greater particularity. “And very well I remember
his poor father. You are looking grand, sir,
fine and stout; I known you all these years and
I declare I never seen you looking stouter. And
welcome back to Danielstown, Mr. Montmorency,
welcome back, sir!”
“Are your grandchildren well?”
“They are,” said Connor gloomily, “but they’re
very bashful. And they do be stravaging about
always and not contented at all. They are a
great distress to herself, and she unable to come
out after them.”
“But is Mrs. Peter Connor not with you?”
“She is, Miss Lois. But she is desthroyed with
it all and disheartened. Indeed, miss, she is in
great distress; and she always looking and starting
and craning up the boreen. It is torn in herself
she is; distracted for Peter and dhreading he’ll
come. It would dishearten yous to be with her
daily and nightly the way she is, the poor woman.
And the military from Carveen have the hearts
torn out of us nightly, and we stretched for
sleep, chasing and charging about in the lorries
they have. Sure you cannot go a step above in
the mountains without them ones lepping out
from your feet like rabbits. Isn’t it the great
pity they didn’t finish their German war once
they had it started?”
“And no news at all of Peter?” Lois asked,
diffident.
“We have not,” said Michael, expressionless.
His face resumed its repose. The sum of detachment
and sadness was this special kind of nobility.
“And I don’t know what is to be the end of it,”
resumed Michael, with a return to his conversational
manner. “I couldn’t tell you what will be
the outcome at all. These surely are times that
would take the heart from you. And thank you,
Miss Lois, and you too yourself, your honour.”
They once more shook hands, complimented
each other again on the beauty of the evening, and
Lois drove on. Michael stood at the gate till they
turned the corner. The mountain farm, its wind-bitten
firs dragged east, its furze-thatched byres,
sank slowly under the curve of a hill. Looking
longest after them, like an eye, a window glittered.
Some grey geese that had gaped and straggled
behind the trap relinquished the chase abruptly,
stumbled round in a flock and went straining off
in the other direction. Their backs were more
than oblivious; they made the trap, the couple in
it, an illusion. And indeed Lois and Hugo both
felt that their pause, their talk, their passing had
been less than a shadow.
“That is not,” said Hugo, after reflection, “the
Michael Connor that I remember. He was a
foxy man with a chin. Has that one a son Peter?”
“He has. I expect you guessed—he is on
the run—‘Proscribed’ don’t they call it? He
could be shot at sight. He is wanted over an
ambush in County Clare; they got him once, but
he escaped again—I was so glad. I shouldn’t
wonder if he was up the boreen at the moment.
I know he is home, for Clancey saw him three
days ago. But don’t speak of it—one cannot
be too careful. Poor Mrs. Peter must be in a
dreadful state, wherever he is. Mrs. Michael is
dying, you know: she has been dying a long time.
The last time I went up they wouldn’t let me see
her, because of the pain.... There are young
men gone from three of the farms up here—Captain
Carmichael told me; he is Intelligence Officer.
And I know it is true, because Clancey told me
too—I say, supposing Gerald had happened to
be with us and Peter Connor had come down
the boreen, would Gerald have had to have shot
him, or would he have been off duty?”
“Peter might have shot Gerald.”
“Oh no, not when he was with me. Besides,”
she added, “Gerald is so matter of fact. Nothing
could make him into a tragedy.”
Hugo debating if she were subtle or very stupid,
Lois busy with melodrama, they drove home
briskly. To the south, below them, the demesne
trees of Danielstown made a dark formal square
like a rug on the green country. In their heart,
like a dropped pin, the grey glazed roof reflecting
the sky lightly glinted. Looking down, it seemed
to Lois they lived in a forest; space of lawns blotted
out in the pressure and dusk of trees. She wondered
they were not smothered; then wondered
still more that they were not afraid. Far from
here too, their isolation became apparent. The
house seemed to be pressing down low in apprehension,
hiding its face, as though it had her
vision of where it was. It seemed to gather its
trees close in fright and amazement at the wide,
light, lovely unloving country, the unwilling bosom
whereon it was set. From the slope’s foot, where
Danielstown trees began, the land stretched out
in a plain flat as water, basin of the Madder and
Darra and their fine wandering tributaries, till
the far hills, faint and brittle, straining against
the inrush of vaster distance, cut the droop of
the sky like a glass blade. Fields gave back
light to the sky—the hedges netting them over
thinly and penetrably—as though the sheen of
grass were a shadow on water, a breath of colour
clouding the face of light. Rivers, profound in
brightness, flowed over beds of glass. The cabins
lifting their pointed white ends, the pink and
yellow farms were but half opaque; cast doubtfully
on their fields the shadow of living. Square
cattle moved in the fields like saints, with a mindless
certainty. Single trees, on a rath, at the
turn of a road, drew up light at their roots. Only
the massed trees—spread like a rug to dull some
keenness, break some contact between self and
senses perilous to the routine of living—only the
trees of the demesne were dark, exhaling darkness.
Down among them, dusk would stream up the
paths ahead, lie stagnant over the lawns, would
mount in the tank of garden, heightening the walls,
dulling the borders like a rain of ashes. Dusk
would lie where one looked as though it were
in one’s eyes, as though the fountain of darkness
were in one’s own perception. Seen from above,
the house in its pit of trees seemed a very reservoir
of obscurity; from the doors one must come out
stained with it. And the kitchen smoke, lying
over the vague trees doubtfully, seemed the very
fume of living.
But as they drove down the home-sense quickened;
the pony, knowing these hedges, rocketed
hopefully in the shafts. The house became a
magnet to their dependence. And indeed it was
nice, they felt in this evening air, to be driving
home, with all they would have to tell of the Mount
Isabel party, to all they would have to hear of
Sir Richard’s day in Cork. Friendly women
smiled at them over half-doors of cabins. And
they both felt approached, friendlier, turning in
up the avenue under the arch of the trees; he
accepting her with philosophy as though she
were his daughter, she comforted in her fancy,
as though he had wept coming over the mountains
and told her his life was empty because she could
never be his wife.
She said: “I hope we shan’t have to wait for
dinner; I couldn’t bear it.” He said: “Really?”
shocked to discover that he also had been thinking
of dinner.
Livvy Thompson had ridden over; she sat on
the steps with her habit over her knee, waving
as they approached. She had sent a message round
to the yard when she heard the trap, so that a
man immediately came to take the pony. “Listen
now—” she began. But Lois only gave her
a brush of the hand; she couldn’t speak till she
had rushed past her into the hall to look for the
post, because of a tearing feeling of expectation.
There was Viola’s square blue temperate envelope
on the table. There was nothing more but some
gloves Lady Naylor had worn in Cork, some
English papers, a box of tennis balls. She had
again that conclusive feeling of disappointment.
“They’re back,” she said to Hugo.
“Listen now,” resumed Livvy, coming in after
her. Lois slipped Viola’s letter into her pocket
and buttoned the flap over it. For what Viola
would think of Livvy she did not like to imagine.
Livvy was anxious to know if Lois had seen
Mr. Lesworth lately, and, if so, whether he had
happened to mention Mr. Armstrong. Because
it did seem strange, she thought, about Mr. Armstrong;
she almost feared that he must be ill.
When she heard Mr. Lesworth had not appeared
either, she was amazed, she said, that Lois was
not more worried. It was now too evident something
must be the matter. She pointed out it
was her duty and Lois’s to find out if they were
ill, or indeed if worse hadn’t happened, as worse
might, to the two young Englishmen in a hostile
country. Lois, thumbing Viola’s envelope, said
she was quite certain they would have heard.
Livvy suspected something was hushed up for
fear of the English papers: nothing was ever
allowed in the English papers that could be mortifying
for the English people to read.
“If they should only be ill,” she said, “there
would be so many little things we could do for
them. It does seem in a kind of a way an opportunity.
I often think it is only when a man is
ill that he understands what a woman means in
his life.”
Lois said that her own impression of a man ill
was one of extreme crossness and of inability
to find the nicest woman attractive at all. She
pointed out that there was an excellent military
hospital at Clonmore, so that they need not imagine
David and Gerald tossing feverish and untended.
She did not suppose they would be allowed a visit,
and confessed that, for her part, she found people
lying down while she stood up embarrassing; so
curiously bumpy and extremely difficult to talk to.
“But if he seemed at all unlikely to recover,”
said Livvy, “there would be several things I should
like to say to Mr. Armstrong. If he should
recover after all, he would be gentlemanly enough
to forget them, though there would be no harm
in their leaving a pleasant impression. To tell you
the truth, Lois, I have often wondered if he does
not think me a little reserved and cold. Does
it ever seem to you that he looks discouraged?
You see, he is accustomed to English girls who
are very free; I believe there is almost nothing
they will not let a man say and that they get kissed
before they get engaged. Now I should not like
him to think I had no heart at all. You know
Irish girls in books are always made out so fascinating
and heartless; I should not like him to think
that of me. And if he does recover, he might go
back to England and get engaged to a girl simply
out of his lower nature. I should not like to feel I
had spoilt a man’s life.”
“I expect,” said Lois, “it is their week for extra
duty.” She thought: “If only I weren’t so certain
there’d be a letter from Gerald to-morrow! If
only he’d let me wonder! He is so terribly there....”
If only his coming or writing could have
some touch of the miracle, heal a doubt.
“Will you not stay to dinner?” she said to Livvy.
“You could borrow one of my frocks.”
“I’d like that yellow taffeta, though I should
have to reef it in. It’s a great inconvenience,
Lois, being so slight as I am, though it does seem
to be admired. Are you sure your aunt will not
mind?... But no, thank you, I couldn’t; my
father’d kill me for riding home after dark. In
fact, I should go now,”—looking up at the sky—“one
never knows, does one? Isn’t that too
bad?”
“Too bad,” agreed Lois, touching her letter.
She walked round to the yard with Livvy to get
her horse. “But listen,” said Livvy, mounting,
“there’s one thing that we had better do. We can
drive in to Clonmore, Wednesday, to do some
shopping: I really do need wool for a jumper.
And if we should meet Mr. Smith or Captain
Carmichael, I should just mention, laughingly, we
hadn’t seen any of them for a long time. And
then it might all come out. Or if the worst came
to the worst, we could drop in to tea at the Fogartys’;
if there was nobody else, there’d be bound to
be Mrs. Vermont. I don’t think she’s trustworthy,
but if there were anything definite she’d be
bound to say—like illness, or an ambush they were
not supposed to mention. Or it might all come
right and the first we would meet might be Mr.
Lesworth or Mr. Armstrong.... I certainly
think, Lois, that is what we should do. If you
can’t get your uncle’s trap, I will take my
father’s.”
She rode away. Lois listened until the romantic
horse-hoofs had died on the avenue, smothered in
trees. This manner of Livvy’s of coming and going
gave her a setting—picaresque, historical somehow.
She would have been much worse if she had ridden
away on a bicycle— Then she took Viola’s
letter out of her pocket and read it out there in
the yard. Gnats danced in the underneath gloom
of the chestnuts.
Viola did think Lois took feeling rather too
earnestly. Lois must not grow less interesting.
She admitted the little Gerald might be affecting;
he was permitted to happen once. Gerald
assimilated, she should be more of a woman. Only
don’t lose detachment, darling; do not lose distance.
Viola would be delighted if Lois would give her
“Trivia.” She confessed it did startle her to be
reminded that up to now she had been only eighteen
by this talk of a nineteenth birthday. She felt,
she said, older than the rocks among which she
sat—she wrote from a rock-garden. Maurice
Evans, a really ridiculous person, sat on a pink
tuft of something valuable, apparently painting
her. By the way, did Laurence read Pater? Maurice
did not—did really anyone nowadays? Did
Lois think that Viola might intrigue Laurence?
Laurence continued a subject for speculation for
three paragraphs. She only referred to Mr. Montmorency
indirectly, and at the very end. She
warned against introspection. “For introspection,
darling, does make us the prey of the nice-middle-aged.”
She complained there was too much
introspection and tennis in Lois’s letters. “Don’t
talk of yourself to that elderly man.”
Lois, relieved but chagrined by the omission,
wondered if Viola really did read one’s letters at
all thoroughly. She always noticed the split infinitives—one
could not be sure. Lois turned in at
the back door and pulled herself up to dress by
the back-stairs banisters. She sniffed—duck for
dinner again: it seemed the end of a cycle. This
morning she had renewed the roses in Mrs. Montmorency’s
room.
Crossing the ante-room, a spring in some board
from her step made an unlatched door swing open.
She saw Mr. Montmorency in shirt-sleeves brushing
his wife’s hair. And Francie, facing the
glass, saw Lois reflected, standing still in alarm
on the shining floor. They smiled at each other.
Mr. Montmorency, thoughtfully and heavily brushing,
did not observe the interchange.
THE VISIT OF MISS NORTON
IX
LIVVY’S afternoon in Clonmore was such a
great success that she forgot the wool for
her jumper. At first there had been
uneasiness; she let Lois drive while she looked
carefully round the Square, went into the Imperial
Hotel to see if her father had left a stick and searched
both pavements of Cork Street, down which they
drove from end to end. In despair, she had just
suggested going up to the tennis club to see was
there anyone there, when the rain came down—it
had been threatening all day, the mountains looked
moist and close on their drive in. They had to
turn in to the Fogartys’. And there, to them
anxiously awaiting tea and social developments in
Mrs. Fogarty’s artistic drawing-room, entered severally
all whom they wished to meet: Captain Carmichael,
Smith with Mrs. Vermont, finally Mr.
Armstrong himself. Mr. Lesworth did not appear
(which, as Livvy whispered to friends, would be
a disappointment for Lois): it turned out that he
was on extra duty. Mrs. Fogarty had one of the
narrow houses looking out on the Square; her
windows were screened from outside observation
by cubes of evergreen; between the pane and the
evergreens rain fell darkly. Mrs. Fogarty’s drawing-room
was thronged with photographs; all the
dear boys who for years back had been garrisoned
at Clonmore, many of whom, alas! had been killed
in that dreadful War. You could not stoop to
put down a cup on one of the little tables without
a twinge of regret and embarrassment, meeting the
candid eyes of some dead young man. The room
was crowded with cushions that slid from the
narrow seats of the chairs and tumbled over the
back of the sofa; cushions with pen-painted sprays,
with poker-worked kittens; very futurist cushions
with bunches of fruit appliques, dear old cushions
with associations and feathers bursting out at the
seams. And there were cushions with Union
Jacks that she wouldn’t, she said, put away—not
if They came at night and stood in her room with
pistols. And this was all the more noble in Mrs.
Fogarty in that she was a Catholic, with relations
whose politics were not above reproach at all.
Mr. Fogarty was a retired solicitor; he had no
politics; he became very cross and reproachful
when they were discussed at the Club and said
he supposed he could not help being a philosopher.
But he drank, which shows that nobody can be
perfect. He never appeared at tea.
As more and more people dropped in and the
chairs gave out, the subalterns pulled the cushions
on to the floor and sat on them. Mrs. Fogarty
was delighted. The room warmed up, there was
just enough air left not to make one aware of discomfort
in breathing. There was a smell of wall-paper,
tea and tea-cakes, polished Sam Browns and
the Nuit d’Amour on Mrs. Vermont’s handkerchief
which she pulled out frequently to wipe honey
from her fingers. They all felt very easy and very
Irish—the qualities radiated, perhaps, from Mrs.
Fogarty, who sat flushed with pleasure and hospitality,
taking up rather more than half of her
own sofa. She wore a brown lace blouse and a
tweed skirt, with a green shell rope that swung and
clinked on the teapot. Indeed, it was all very
harmonious; she did not know how she would
have lived at all without the military at Clonmore.
After tea, cigarettes went round, there was a
kick and splutter of patent lighters. Livvy said
she would not smoke, she would not indeed: they
might laugh but she was an old-fashioned girl.
Her continued protests attracted a good deal of
attention, till she noticed that old-fashioned girls
were after all in the majority. The rector’s daughters
and Doreen Hartigan all sat looking approving
and rather unfinished about the mouth. So she
accepted a strong cigarette of Captain Carmichael’s,
and Smith broke into a howl and said she had
sacrificed his ideal of womanhood. Mrs. Fogarty
suggested music: they helped her move the bowls
and photographs off the grand piano which, undraped
and opened, gave out to Mrs. Vermont’s
fingers some damp chords. It was too bad,
declared Mrs. Fogarty, listening doubtfully, that
their tuner had died in Cork and she hadn’t the
heart to look for another since. She said they
must have real music, not just the piano. Real
talent was present, she added, and looked round
compellingly. There was a scuffle from which
Mr. Smith was forced up. He stood with his
weight on one leg, stroking his hair detachedly,
while Mrs. Vermont looked through the music.
Mrs. Vermont remarked in passing to Captain
Carmichael that this was a country where the most
extraordinary people died. “Well, I mean,” she
said, “who would have expected that of a piano-tuner?
There was a house where I went for
tennis; they had had a parlourmaid there who
died. And last week I went for some little cakes
to Fitzgerald’s and they were all plain ones. I asked
for some fancies and they said the woman who did
the icing had been taken, God rest her soul! Really,
there’s something grizzly about that cake shop.”
“In the midst of life we are in death, if you know
what I mean,” said Captain Carmichael.
Mr. Smith said he didn’t mind what he did
sing: they all wanted “The Green Eye of the Little
Yellow God.” The piece was very tragic and
sinister, they all sat wrapt and Livvy did not notice
that Mr. Armstrong was pressing her arm till she
felt Doreen Hartigan notice. She moved away
from him, closer to Lois.
“There’s a b-r-r-roken-hearted woman tends the grave of Mad Carewe
And the Yellow God sits smiling up above.”
Lois blushed and let Livvy squeeze her hand.
They both wondered: “How should I feel under
the circumstances?” The subalterns round all
looked dogged, clasping their knees, and thought
of what one would do for a woman. There was
a stagger of emotional clapping. Then Mrs.
Vermont cried they were too ridiculous, the boys
were sillies, she couldn’t sing at all really, but if
she must she would. So she sang “Melisande,”
which sent every girl there into a trance of self-pity;
it was so clearly written about oneself.
“With your eyes for fear and your mouth for love
And your youth for Pity’s grace
—All alone, Mel-lisande, all alone.”
The subalterns thought it pretty, high-class but
rather dull, and clapped with abandon when it was
over. They cast up David Armstrong, blushing
and looking very much surprised at himself and all
of them. He blushed till half-way through “The
Shooting of Dan McGrew,” when he became carried
away and carried his audience with him.
“A woman came between us,
She was beautiful as Venus,”
brought a momentary return to consciousness.
He looked at the ceiling to avoid seeing Livvy and
Lois. The atmosphere strained with cramp, there
was a creak of leather as subalterns readjusted their
attitudes. Mrs. Fogarty sent round a plate of
chocolate biscuits. What a pity it was, she said,
that they did not get up some pierrots. When
David returned to his place Livvy was rose-pink;
she fluttered at him her remarkably long lashes.
“Indeed,” declared Mrs. Fogarty, looking from
David to Smith (who had no Christian name), “I
never heard anything like the two of you. No,
not in Dublin in Horse Show week, nor in London
nor Liverpool either. You’re remarkably gifted.
Isn’t it a pity they were all so sad? Shall we all
have a song now, something rousing, you know,
that you sang in the Great War?”
“Oh, do you know,” cried Mrs. Vermont, “I never
knew Tipperary was really a place till I came to
Ireland?”
“Listen to her!” shouted Mrs. Fogarty, sweeping
some more of the cushions on to the floor.
They were all delighted. Mrs. Vermont spread her
fingers over her face. Under cover of all this
excitement Lois rose and said they would have to
go. She was sorry, because the party seemed
slightly insulted; also, Livvy was so happy. If
David should die now, she did not think Livvy
would have to reproach herself. Also Captain
Carmichael had seemed intrigued; he had spoken
mysteriously of the adventures he had in the mountains
and of the disguises he sometimes put on.
She knew he must feel like the Scarlet Pimpernel;
she could not help sympathizing. When she rose,
he said they must meet again. He and David
came out to help them into their trap in the Imperial
yard, tucked them up in their rugs, relinquished
them disapprovingly to the exposures of
the journey and stood looking after them with rain
dripping down their bronzed and military noses.
They drove home very much flushed and excited.
The rain came down in a curtain and hid the mountains;
brown shining puddles were linked along the
road. They agreed about almost every one—especially
Mrs. Vermont and the D.I.’s niece—they
laughed at each other over their mackintosh collars,
eyes bright with comprehension and sympathy, while
the strong rain stung their noses, then numbed
them. Only when Livvy said, “Melisande” was a
beautiful poem, wasn’t it, something stiffened in
Lois: she said she thought it was sentimental.
“All that fuss, if you know what I mean, about
just somebody.”
“Well, love is that, if you come to think,” said
Livvy, “and myself I think it is very satisfying.”
There was something so very experienced about
the tip of her nose that Lois went flat. She felt
that she herself must be like a cake in which the
flour had been forgotten.
She complained: “I wish we were not being late
just this evening. Miss Norton, you know, is
arriving and I did so want to look nice. My nose
will not have thawed till half through dinner.”
“Oh, who is she? Is she pretty? How old is
she? Is she engaged?”
“Never met her—though she often seems to have
come to Danielstown. But I feel she may be a
person one wants to look pretty at. She annoys
Aunt Myra by being unfortunate in ways that are
far more trying for other people than for herself.
When she was little she came over to Danielstown
to a children’s party: she fell down at once on the
scraper and cut her knee and there was a good deal of
fuss and bloodiness. And another time there were
people to tea she started an argument about Kimberley:
they all stayed till past eight o’clock in the
library taking down the Encyclopædia Britannica
while other people who were coming to dinner kept
arriving. And another time she lost her engagement
ring at a tennis party and they were all very
much upset. She wrote afterwards to say it didn’t
matter because she had broken off her engagement
anyhow and the man said he didn’t want the ring,
he said he wished it were at the bottom of the sea.
I always thought people breaking off an engagement
went all noble, but that sounds to me vindictive.
Aunt Myra stayed put out.... She is
twenty-nine.”
“It seems to me odd,” said Livvy, “that she
shouldn’t have brought anything off by this time.
But I dare say,” she added, “that there has been a
disappointment.”
At this point they heard a lorry coming. Black
and Tans, fortified inwardly against the weather,
were shouting and singing and now and then firing
shots. The voices, kept low by the rain, the grind
of wheels on the rocky road tunnelled through the
close air with a particular horror. To meet in this
narrow way would be worse than a dream; before
the half-obscured lorry appeared Livvy had turned
the pony hurriedly up a boreen. They went up some
way and waited under a dripping thorn-bush: if
Black and Tans saw one hiding they were sarcastic.
They heard the lorry grind past the mouth of the
boreen with apprehension, feeling exposed and
hunted. Lois recalled with surprise that she had
cried for a whole afternoon before the War because
she was not some one in a historical novel: it had
begun, she thought, because they told her to go
and practise. The road clear again, they discovered
they could not turn the trap; they had to back
the pony out. “My!” said Livvy, glaring at the
horizon. “I wish I were driving a lorry! I should
like to crash those fellows head on!”
Just before eight, Livvy dropped Lois at Danielstown
gates and drove off, beating her pony into a
gallop. Her father would kill her, certainly!
Lois raced up the avenue till she had no breath,
then had to crawl the rest of the way, recovering.
Apprehensive, she strained for the throb of the
dinner-gong, a shriek of reproach from a window.
But her unpunctuality passed unnoticed: Miss
Norton herself had only just arrived. The hall was
full of suitcases, a fur coat sprawled on a chair, there
was a tennis racquet, a bag of golf-clubs.
“Though where the poor female is going to
play golf ...!” thought Lois. “A nice coat....
Good, she has brought the Tatler!”
No one had even gone up to dress, from the
library voices exclaimed in excitement; voices
complained insistently through the drawing-room
door. Lois undid the top buttons of her mackintosh
and stepped out of it, leaving a damp ring.
Absently she wrung the water out of her hat. She
listened.
“She is certain she has left it in the train,”
her aunt was saying; “she says she would swear it
was put in with her at Kingsbridge and that she
saw it after leaving Darramore. I do not believe
myself in travelling with suitcases, one is always
counting—I believe in one good trunk.”
“Looking at it from the porters’ point of
view—” said Mrs. Montmorency.
The library door clicked open and Laurence,
looking quite enthusiastic, shot into the hall.
“She thinks telephoning will do it,” he said to
Lois. “I cannot make her understand about the
Ballyhinch telephone.” He disappeared, shouting,
into the back part of the house. Evidently there
need be no hurry for anything. Lois sat on the
hall table to look at the Tatler. Early autumn
fashions reminded her—this was an opportunity to
try on the fur coat. She hoped for the proper
agony, finding a coat she could not live without....
Her arms slipped silkily through; her hands appeared,
almost tiny, out of the huge cuffs. “Oh,
the escape!” she thought, pressing her chin down,
fading, dying into the rich heaviness. “Oh, the
escape in other people’s clothes!” And she paced
round the hall with new movements: a dark, rare,
rather wistful woman, elusive with jasmine. “No?”
she said on an upward note: the voice startled her,
experience was behind it. She touched the fur
lightly, touched the edge of a cabinet—her finger-tips
drummed with a foreign sensitiveness. And the
blurred panes, the steaming changing trees, the
lonely cave of the hall no longer had her consciousness
in a clamp. How she could live, she felt.
She would not need anyone, she would be like an
orchestra playing all to itself. “Is it mink?” she
wondered.
“You look so nice!” said Miss Norton, from the
door of the library.
Lois went quite blank. “Oh,” she said.
“Where is that unfortunate Lady Naylor?”
“I can’t think— Well, she is in the drawing-room.”
“Anyhow,” said Miss Norton, “I will go up
now. When she sees me looking less arrived she
may forget about the suitcase.” She looked at
Lois earnestly. “I don’t lose things except coming
here; I am efficient really. But there seems a kind
of fatality ...”
“I know.”
“Do you?” she said with interest, a keen disconcerting
flash. “How odd that you should!”
An approach seemed possible, imminent. Lois,
feeling herself smiled at, unwrapped herself from
the coat without embarrassment. Miss Norton,
who did not seem surprised by the disappearance
of the family, asked to be shown where she was.
They went upstairs together; she was on the top
floor, opposite Laurence.
“Who was the capable person? Who wouldn’t
let me telephone—the young man?”
“Laurence.”
“Oh, Laurence. And the other people: I
couldn’t hear their names. They seemed very
much here—faintly resentful: I expect I must be
horrible for them. He at once accused me of
having cut my knee on a scraper—when I was
three or four. Who did you say?”
“The Montmorencys.”
“Oh, Hugo and Francie? Of course I have
heard of them. Isn’t she his mother—practically?”
Miss Norton took off her hat and looked at herself
in the glass dispassionately and closely. “God!”
she remarked.
“He brushes her hair,” said Lois, laughing—in
the sharp unshadowy atmosphere produced by Miss
Norton it sounded more of a giggle—and swinging
with her back against the edge of the door.
“Oh, then it is mutual.”
“I knew him best when I was a child.”
“Yes, he looks like that. Thank you so much;
I think I have got everything. Yes, heaps of hot
water. Wouldn’t you like to go now: I mean,
won’t there be dinner?... Oh, Lois!”
Lois, from over the threshold, came back willingly.
“Mm?” she said.
“I mean, you are Lois, aren’t you? I’ve heard
so much ... No, don’t be late: I should hate
you to help me.” Miss Norton had taken her
coat off and stood in a frilled shirt looking round
distastefully at her suitcases. “Go,” she said, “do
really.”
Lois, half-way down the gallery, met Laurence
coming up. “Mm?” said Laurence.
“I think she seems quite mad,” said Lois doubtfully.
“You would,” replied Laurence and went past
her coldly.
X
ONE did not lightly telephone. There was a
telephone six miles away, at Ballyhinch,
but its use made excessive demands upon
the sympathy and attention of the post-mistress.
Marda could not understand—as Sir Richard said,
one would think she had come from America.
From all their angles she seemed to them very
modern. They sat on the steps after breakfast,
waiting for post to come, discussing what they
should do. There was something agonizing to
Sir Richard in the thought of that suitcase. Marda
said, it would not have mattered at all but that her
tennis shoes seemed to be in it. It was quite a
relief when the postman settled the matter by saying
there had been another raid last night in the Brittas
direction and that all the wires were down again.
It had been a great raid, the postman said; if the
boys had not fled it would have been almost a battle.
What times, said Francie, looking at Marda
doubtfully, they did live in! But other times,
said Marda, other disadvantages. Nobody hurt,
they hoped? Well, said the postman, the Black
and Tans had been fired on, but why would they
not be, they themselves firing to the left and right
continually? It seemed two of them ones had
pitched from the lorry the way you would think
they’d be killed and the boys had bolted, leaving
the two lying.
“How do you know?” said Marda. The postman,
looking austerely at her, asked how would one help
hearing? Though it was not for him to say what was
true and what was what you would hear. Sir Richard
agreed with this hastily and with some warmth: he
did not want to have the postman discouraged.
Marda received her six letters as a matter of
course and glanced them through sceptically.
Lois watched her. Putting the letters away Marda
suggested that, since Laurence was so practical,
he should drive her into Clonmore or Ballydarra
to buy more tennis shoes. Laurence feared he
did not drive the car nicely: he could avoid things
but he was inclined to wobble.
Sir Richard had disappeared on his morning
round; how much of his corn had been “laid” by
the rain last night he did not like to imagine; it
was better to know. The rain had ceased before
breakfast; loud drops still drummed through the
leaves; the trees with their rainy smell were a wall
of moisture. Thin vapours trailed on the sky
over an intermittent brightness; distances showed
up thinly, as though painted. “The end of our
weather,” said poor Francie.
“But I feel,” persisted Marda, “I must have
tennis shoes. I don’t mind wobbling.”
“Laurence is more of the intellectual type,”
explained Francie.
“I don’t think that matters.”
“It does with a car,” said Lois.
“I have never consciously driven you,” said her
cousin coldly.
Marda laughed; she got up and stood on the
steps. Fixed in their row, the others all looked
up at her. She was tall; her back, as she stood
looking over the fields, was like a young man’s in
its vigorous slightness. She escaped the feminine
pear-shape, her shoulders were square, legs long
from the knee down. Her light-brown dress
slipped and fitted with careless accuracy, defining
spareness negatively under its slack folds. Sophistication
opened further horizons to Lois. Marda
gathered her strung cornelians in one hand into
a bunch at her throat; they slipped down the nape
of her neck. Standing vaguely she had still that
quality of directedness—from which they all swerved
off in their different ways. A hardy unawareness
of self in her heightened one’s own consciousness.
Her lightest look watched, her casual listening
assessed, her speech was a lightning attack on one’s
integrity out of the stronghold of her indifference.
They remained sitting behind her with a vague
sensation of having been abandoned. Hugo came
out, shut the glass door with precision and blinked
at the sky. “Clearing,” he said, then asked Marda
to come for a turn. Exercise seemed the order
of the morning; Lois and Laurence were later to
go to the village with messages. Francie was
waiting to go to the garden with Lady Naylor.
“Am I or am I not to drive her?” wondered
Laurence aloud, with fatalism, looking after Miss
Norton.
“She’ll certainly let you know.” Francie’s little
ironical smile sent her cheeks up, their faint
flush wavering, under her eyes. She was not so
simple. Her diffidence, her inquiring softness, an
outward “laciness” of her personality—into which
impressions seemingly filtered like light, diffusedly,
making no impact—covered a structure of delicate
hardness. She was in spirit insistent, tenacious
and quick in antagonisms; complexity tightened, as
had been her delicate body’s, by constant resistance
to pain. She gave hospitality to the ever-living
Laura, she invited claims from Mrs. Archie
Trent, she would have endowed Lois, but she
watched Marda turn beside Hugo into the beech
walk with raised brows, a cat’s blank unsparing
lucidity.
“She’s very positive,” said Laurence, still looking
after them.
“Positive about what?” asked Lois eagerly.
Laurence held his breath with annoyance and
pulled up a sock.
Marda wanted nothing of Mr. Montmorency but
entertainment. She was an experienced fellow-visitor.
He interested her; his negativeness was
startling. She had heard of him, and of it, in all
parts of the country, had arrived at several houses
into a loud reaction, a kind of indignant excitement
following his departure. Her acquiescence in
finding him so exactly as he had been described
was tempered by incredulity, almost shock. And
she could define in him qualities which her friends
in the rush of discussion had slurred or had overshot:
one, a kind of drawn-back apprehension in
his approaches, as though something bright were
being brandished before his eyes. His look,
coming wavering round this interruption, had, in
regard to herself, a peculiar intensity. She was
already real to him as a woman.
He now swung his blackthorn, slashing the air
widely. “I remember this walk,” she said. “I
seem to have been here yesterday. But I thought
it was somewhere in Kerry, at Castle Reagh.”
“Oh no, it is here,” he said wisely. They
laughed. Down the walk, brightening air slipped
like gauze round the beech trunks; great pewter
limbs went turning and straining up with the
sheen of muscles. Drops, infrequent and startling,
loudly fell on his hat brim, icily on her shoulders
through the mesh of her dress. The path’s
perspective was a tunnel of glass. Her companion’s
lameness of thought, the faltering silence produced
a kind of vacuum in her; she covered a yawn.
“This is not a good morning,” he suggested,
“to walk under trees.”
“Really the worst possible.”
“Oh ... had we better—?” However, they
walked on.
“I always come here,” he said in extenuation.
“My turn to the right’s mechanical. I was here
as a boy, you know.”
“Were you here when I bled so much at that
children’s party?”
“Not actually, but I have always heard of it.
Didn’t you lose a ring?”
“At another party, at a more suitable age. It
was the most lovely ring I have ever had—Regent
Street. The jeweller said it must be emeralds
because the lady was Irish and Timothy fully agreed
with him. I had had no idea I had such an expensive
nationality.”
“What a pity!”
“Yes, those things are always a pity.”
He was not sure how much she included. “Did
your—did Timothy mind?”
“Not so much as the Naylors. Later, he was
killed on the Somme. But he had two sons first,
so it all came right—I mean, he married.”
“Oh yes ... I suppose you are often here? I
have often heard of you. And at Johnstown and
Ballyduff and up in the North I have heard you
expected. But I was always going. Once, I
believe, we crossed at an avenue gate.”
The fact was, she acknowledged with a laugh,
that they both visited incorrigibly. She knew also,
she told him, that he not only visited but travelled;
he had been almost everywhere but Canada.
“But I really should not have come back here,”
she said. “There is something in Lady Naylor’s
eye: a despairing optimism. I feel that suitcase
won’t be the end of me here. There will be a
raid and I shall be shot on the avenue, not even
fatally, or Laurence will take me out and upset
that car. Then really she will never forgive me,
though the efforts she makes will follow me over
Europe.... How far do you think this war is
going to go? Will there ever be anything we can
all do except not notice?”
“Don’t ask me,” he said, but sighed sharply as
though beneath the pressure of omniscience. “A
few more hundred deaths, I suppose, on our side—which
is no side—rather scared, rather isolated,
not expressing anything except tenacity to something
that isn’t there—that never was there. And
deprived of heroism by this wet kind of smother of
commiseration. What’s the matter with this country
is the matter with the lot of us individually—our
sense of personality is a sense of outrage and
we’ll never get outside of it.”
But the hold of the country was that, she considered,
it could be thought of in terms of oneself,
so interpreted. Or seemed so—“Like Shakespeare,”
she added more vaguely, “or isn’t it?...
But now tell me,” she said, “about Lois?”
“Lois?” He was guiltily startled, thinking of
Laura’s daughter.
“Lois—haven’t you noticed her? She sat beside
you at dinner.”
He feared he was no good at people, he was
preparing to say—but the remark, tried over
critically, seemed a kind of echo: he reminded
himself of Laurence. He was confused by her cool
watching, her eyebrows drawn up and together
in ironical friendly despair at him. Her face—like
a Dutch doll’s; he defensively told himself,
in its accurate clear disposition of red-and-white
colour—was, at this sudden pull-up to her interest,
like a mask in its halt of expression. Her features,
the dark line of hair springing over the white square
of forehead, were in their special relation like something
almost too clearly written that he still could
not read; to be learnt now and puzzled over in
retrospect.
She was, in fact, repelled by his lack of sympathy.
“Lois,” she said, “is nice. She is in such
a hurry, so concentrated upon her hurry, so helpless.
She is like some one being driven against
time in a taxi to catch a train, jerking and jerking
to help the taxi and looking wildly out of the window
at things going slowly past. She keeps hearing
that final train go out without her. How I
should hate to be young again! But, I had no
ambitions.”
He watched her unguarded profile. “Oh yes,”
he said, “ambition?”
“I’ve never met any woman so determined to
love well, so anxious to love soon, so certain of her
ability. She really prays for somebody to be
fatal; she eyes doors. And you are all disappointments.”
“To begin with,” said Hugo, nettled. “She’s
not a woman—”
“Awful if nothing happens to her! She reminds
me, too, of a little girl I remember at school sports;
in a team race, one of those things with bean-bags.
Hopping at the end of the line, working up to the
front slowly, simply sick with eagerness. Her
turn comes, she is the whole world: her eyes shoot
out of her head—she drops the bean-bag. They
all groan.... It makes me go dry inside to think
of it now.”
“There is a young man—Harold—Gerald. They
dance on the avenue.”
“Like rabbits?”
“They have a gramophone.”
“Is he supposed to love her?”
“My wife thinks so. Laurence considers he
suitably might. Her aunt does not think it suitable
at all and won’t hear a word of it, so he officially
doesn’t.”
“Anyhow, to be loved is not her affair at all, it
is quite irrelevant. She does not love him, poor
little thing: he is useless.”
“I can’t think it necessary for a young girl, at
her age, to love anybody.”
“Oh, it is not,” she said impatiently, “at any
age. But one has those ideas.”
This dismissal, this lightness vexed him. Let
her speak for herself. She had, then, her whole
sex’s limitations: a teachable shallowness, a hundred
little abilities. But he, prey to a constant
self-reproach, was a born lover; conscious of cycles
in him, springs and autumns of desire and disenchantment,
and of the intermediate pausing
seasons, bland or frigid, eaten at either margin
by past or coming shadows of change.
“I have not these ideas,” he said coldly.
They turned at the end of the walk through a
gateway, into a fir plantation. Here they walked
between walls of dusk, to be released to an airy green
space, tree-pillared. The green strip, measureless
on ahead but narrow, slanted down on their
left to the open meadows, on their right was bounded
by an uneven wall. Below the wall an unseen
swift stream flowed, tinkling and knocking. The
path hesitated ahead of them, faint on the bright
green turf. Here the few beeches stood, unrelated,
lovely, desultory; between their trunks—the
tall mountains, vivid in a suffusion of distant light.
The scene glittered. “More rain coming,” said
Mr. Montmorency.
But she stared ahead. A trench-coat flickered
between the trees, approaching. Her look focussed;
there was an interchange. Coming to them, the
young man almost hurried. After consideration:
“Hullo!” said Mr. Montmorency.
“Hal-lo!” cried Gerald, flushing with expectation.
Never had they been so acclaimed. He was
out this way, he explained, coming into ear-shot,
and was proposing to take advantage of something
rash that Lady Naylor had once said about dropping
in to lunch any time. “They’re not out?” he asked
suddenly with, Marda noticed, a queer haggardness.
They were not? That was splendid, marvellous.
Early about?—he had been out all night,
he told them. Oh yes—feeling Mr. Montmorency
glance at his chin interrogatively—he had
shaved by the road; he had brought his tackle with
him, he often did. Here—no, that was his pistol:
the other pocket. Marda extolled his foresight.
Mr. Montmorency had forgotten to introduce
them; they stood socially grouped round a beech
and exchanged cigarettes.
“Very busy now?” said Marda, bending down
to the match Gerald sheltered.
“Off and on—generally on, but we don’t know.”
She really seemed most remarkable, he looked
intently, just lightly enough to avoid a stare. He
liked talk like this, square and facty, compact with
assumptions Pleasant that she should be here at
the house for lunch. Light slipped back over the
dints of her hair as she looked up again. Lunch
seemed a torch in the future; between now and
lunch-time he would have come on Lois, somewhere,
somehow, and amazingly kissed her amazed hands.
There would be, till the kiss, no speaking—there
she eluded him. He had thought this out.
He had thought this out, seen ahead to this
climax rather—as though a flower’s centre had been
revealed by an impetuous opening out of lovely
confused petals—on the lorry, breasting the darkness.
Watching the morning skylines form and
creep out like enemies from the cold night, he had
burned at her nearness under the insistent groping
of the wind. Rushing under his eyes the hedge-tops
shivered; he had laughed and shivered, hand
in his pistol pocket, hand on his razor. And now,
as looking at Marda he once more kissed Lois’s
hands, he knew once more, assured by her eyes,
that keen truth of the first showing of daylight.
He was fortified in assurance. Leaning with her
elbow against the tree, returning casually his directness
of look, she recalled some profound and
certain excitement, as of his first approach to the
War. Now he meant to go past the hands, to
kiss the curve of Lois’s cheek as she strained away,
then stamp her uncertain mouth with his own certainty.
Naïvely, he looked at his wrist-watch.
“Yes, go on,” she said, looking up through trees
where a bright breath disturbed the closeness.
He looked past her, the path led to Lois. This
green open path spaced out with trees was (he afterwards
thought) like something in heaven.
“It will rain by lunch-time,” said Mr. Montmorency.
And indeed the sky was already creeping
together and fading, and the mountains’ sharpness
seemed a kind of anxiety.
“I wish,” said Gerald to Marda, “you’d been
out up there this morning. You wouldn’t know
where you were, with the light coming.”
“Is there a smell of daylight? I once heard a
man say—”
“Well, that is just like me—I was smoking.”
“Look, you must go on.”
“Yes, perhaps—” He went on. She was
left only half protected by irony from an inrush
of desolation. His look and smile clung to her
memory with the tenacity of irrelevance: his steps
on the grass died out quickly. There was silence:
a cold apprehension of rain in the beeches, the
tinkling and knocking of water beyond the wall.
Hugo, having walked a short way ahead, looked
back at her sharply. She was startled. “Bother!”
she thought. For there was bother behind the look.
“Do we go on?” They walked on, but were
oppressed by their lack of objective. They met
the white stare of a cottage, stared and turned.
“Dannie Regan lives there: he shot out an eye
shooting rabbits and now he’s losing the sight of
the other. I used to go out with him when I was
a boy—so high. His mother lives with him—or
should still; I haven’t heard that she’s gone. She
must be a hundred and four.”
“Do you know the man I am going to marry,
Leslie Lawe? He’s a stockbroker; he fishes a good
deal. His people are in Meath.”
“Meath?... I didn’t know you—”
“I am really. I haven’t told the Naylors. They
think my engagements fantastic; you see, they
have all come to nothing. But I ought to have
told the Naylors; it ought to have come at once,
but there was that wretched suitcase. I will say
something at dinner, not lunch: please do something
to lessen the atmosphere of surprise.”
“When?”
“Oh, we think this winter.”
He looked from one window of the cottage to
the other. “It will make a break in the winter,”
he said at last. “I dare say you will go somewhere
sunny. Algiers perhaps—Morocco, if you are
able.”
“Yes, he is quite rich.”
“I shouldn’t go to the Riviera.... But I
thought you didn’t believe in this sort of thing?”
“I? Oh, I never said so.”
Now he came to think of it, she had not explicitly
said so. “I hope you will be happy.”
“I don’t expect I shall be much different.”
“I think,” he said, “I must go in and talk to
Dannie. He will have heard I’m back. It seems
a good time now—do you mind?”
“I’ll talk to Mrs. Regan.”
“She’s deaf.”
“Then we’ll smile at each other—she’s not
blind.”
They approached the doorway that yearned up
the path like an eye-socket. A breath of peat
smoke, of cold trodden earth, of the ghostly dark
of white walls came out from the cottage. Dannie
took form on the darkness, searching with his one
eye. He stood with his white beard, helpless and
eager. “Well!” exclaimed Hugo. Then Dannie
broke out: this was young Mr. Hugo, wasn’t he
the lovely gentleman, as fine and upstanding as
ever. And here was his wife he’d brought with
him, the beautiful lady. And, trembling and
searching, he took Marda’s hand. He declared
that she brought back the sight of youth to his eyes.
XI
IT rained before lunch-time. Gerald heard loud
drops come after him as he went up the
beech walk. Under every beech he expected
to see Lois looking round in surprise. When he
heard a dog in the undergrowth he turned, laughing
with expectation. But it was the louche yellow
dog from the lodge, intent on rabbiting. Soon a
square black eye of the house—three—four—looked
down at him through the branches; he came
out under the whole cold shell of it, streaked with
rain and hollow-looking from an interior darkness.
The yellow dog passed him, looked back scornfully
from the steps and pattered in at the door with
an air of possession. “Hallo!” called Gerald,
looking about him.
But she was nowhere; the place was cold with
her absence and seemed forgotten. The tennis
party became a dream—parasols with their coloured
sunshine, rugs spread, shimmer of midges, amiable
competition of voices. Something had now been
wiped from the place with implied finality. Gerald
told himself it was all very queer, quiet; that it
was disappointing about Lois. He tugged the
bell, a maid appeared in surprise, did her back hair
hastily, encouraged him in with a smile and left
him. The hall with staring portraits contracted
round a glove on the table—a grey suède gauntlet
strapped at the wrist—he picked up the glove and
kissed it. But the house was full of ladies, the
glove might as well be Marda’s—he dropped it
doubtfully.
A lovely mystery of feminine life: what did
a young girl do with herself in the mornings?
Vaguely he pictured keyboards and pink ambling
fingers. He recollected those sage-green sexless
covers of intellectual books. He recalled the musty
smell of work-boxes, the blush through transparent
paper of shell-pink needlework wrapped
away hastily. You never asked a girl what she was
making.
He listened, took off his trench-coat, stepped to
the drawing-room door. The five tall windows
stood open on rain and the sound of leaves, rain
stuttered along the sills, the grey of the mirrors
shivered. Polished tables were cold little lakes of
light. The smell of sandalwood boxes, a kind of
glaze on the air from all the chintzes numbed his
earthy vitality, he became all ribs and uniform.
He was aware of intrusion. But he dared not go
in unasked to the library, where Sir Richard might
well look up from writing, sharp with pince-nez.
He could not again face the hall—he was shy of
the glove.
He took up the Spectator, read an article on
Unrest and thought of the Empire. Mechanically
his hand went up to his tie. He looked ahead to
a time when it all should be accurately, finally
fenced about and all raked over. Then there
should be a fixed leisured glow, and relaxation, as
on coming in to tea from an afternoon’s gardening
with his mother in autumn. He turned in thought
to confident English country, days like the look in
a dog’s eyes, rooms small in the scope of firelight,
neighbourly lights through trees. He thought of
a woman, kind and palpable, who should never
produce this ache, this absence.... A door
dragged forward its portière; Lois came in from
the dining-room, brushing rain from her frieze
coat. He stood for a moment in a kind of despair
at her agitation, as though he were trying to take
her photograph. Then he stepped forward and
kissed her, his hands on her wet shoulders.
“—Oh, but look here—” cried Lois.
But she was his lovely woman: kissed. He
shone at her, she helpless. She looked out at the
hopeless rain.
“I love—” he said eagerly.
“Oh, but look here—”
“But I love—”
“What are you doing in the drawing-room?”
“I’ve come to lunch.”
“Do they know?”
“I haven’t seen anyone.”
“I don’t know who to tell,” she said distractedly.
“They have all disappeared; they always are disappearing.
You’d think this was the emptiest house
in Ireland—we have no family life. It’s no good
my telling Brigid because she forgets, and the
parlourmaid is always dressing. I suppose I had
better lay you a place myself—but I don’t know
where the knives are kept. I can’t think why you
are being so sudden all of a sudden, in every way:
you never used to be. I haven’t even done the
flowers yet. I do wish you wouldn’t, Gerald—I
mean, be so actual. And do be natural at lunch,
or I shall look such a goat. You really might have
asked me, I never mind talking things over. But
now the gong will go at any moment. And how
do you know I’m not in love with a married man?”
“You wouldn’t be so neurotic; I mean, like a
novel. I mean: do be natural, Lois.”
“Don’t look so, so inflamed.... Miss Norton
is here; she’s a girl—at least a kind of a girl. She’s
awfully attractive.”
“I think I met her. She’s awfully—well, not
beautiful, but ... Oh, Lois ...”
“Do be normal: do play the piano.”
“I can’t start playing the piano before I’ve even
told them I’ve come to lunch. I may be musical,
Lois, but I’m not artistic.”
“All right,” she said, and walked away from
him round the room. So that was being kissed:
just an impact, with inside blankness. She was
lonely, and saw there was no future. She shut
her eyes and tried—as sometimes when she was
sea-sick, locked in misery between Holyhead and
Kingstown—to be enclosed in nonentity, in some
ideal no-place, perfect and clear as a bubble. Or
she was at a party, unreal and vivid, or running
on hard sands. “It wouldn’t have mattered so
much at the seaside,” she said to Gerald.
“But we never are at the seaside.”
She opened a sandalwood box and looked in:
three blue beads and a receipt of her own from
Switzers: three-and-eleven for yellow velvet pansies,
worn at a dance and spoilt. “It’s not even
as though we were at a dance,” she added.
“Lois, I’ve been thinking about you all night,
up in the mountains—right up there when you
were asleep. You were wonderful.”
“Haven’t you been to bed at all?”
“No, you know I—”
“Oh, Gerald— Oh ... darling— But you
did have breakfast?”
The gong sounded: great brass balls went bouncing
about the empty rooms. The parlourmaid
looked in perfunctorily. “Lunch?” said Gerald to
Lois.
“No one is in—and I don’t suppose lunch is
even ready. Gerald, did you have breakfast?”
“An enormous breakfast at Ballydarra....
What were you saying, Lois; what did you call
me then ... before the gong?”
But now she flushed and answered: “I’m sopping
wet; I’m steaming, I smell like a dog. I should
have thought you would want me to go and change.
I should have thought you’d be—protecting.”
“You know I’d die for you.”
They looked at each other. The words had a
solemn echo, as though among high dark arches
in a church where they were standing and being
married. She thought of death and glanced at
his body, quick, lovely, present and yet destructible.
Something passed sensation and touched her consciousness
with a kind of weight and warmth; she
glimpsed a quiet beyond experience, as though for
many nights he had been sleeping beside her.
“What did I say then? Say it.”
“‘Darling’ ...”
But she turned away from some approach in his
look.
Lady Naylor and Mrs. Montmorency passed, in
profile, under the three west windows, pressed very
close together under a green en-tout-cas, discussing
the vice-regency of the Aberdeens. Simultaneously,
Mr. Montmorency and Miss Norton were
heard coming up the steps rather breathlessly,
talking about money. They must both have been
conscious of being a little vulgar, a little English,
for as Sir Richard rattled open the glass door and
went out to meet them, they broke off flatly.
“You must have got very wet,” said Sir Richard.
“Marda, about that suitcase of yours. I have been
thinking it over—”
“Sir Richard, I can’t bear you to—”
“My dear girl, a suitcase is a suitcase—I was
just saying to Marda, Myra, that I have been thinking
over that suitcase of hers—”
“We had better have lunch at once,” said Lady
Naylor imperatively.
“Miss Norton will have to change.”
“Hugo, how could you let her get so wet!”
“My dear, I am not an umbrella.”
“Marda, how could you go out without a mackintosh!”
In the drawing-room Gerald walked to a window
and stared at the rain in perplexity, stroking the
back of his head, looking rather an ordinary kind
of subaltern. Lois looked at herself in a mirror,
then went out to the hall to tell them about Gerald.
Every one stared, she put up a hand to her face.
“Mr. Lesworth has come to lunch,” she said deprecatingly.
“You told him he could whenever he
wanted, so I suppose he thought he might.”
“Of course,” said Lady Naylor; “I suppose you
have told Sarah?”
“Well, I don’t know where to find her; she is
always dressing.”
“Of course she is not always dressing; should
I keep a parlourmaid who was? She only changes
once a day, but you always go and look for her at
the wrong times. Where is Mr. Lesworth?”
“In the drawing-room.”
“How extraordinary! Wouldn’t he rather be
in the library? Richard, why didn’t you ask Mr.
Lesworth into the library? I expect now he had
better wash.”
Lois went upstairs: Marda came up after her
and took her arm; Lois started. She could not
think of anything to say, Marda was not even
trying; they went up silently. “Some time,”
Lois said as they parted, “can I show you my
drawings? They’re fearfully bad.”
“Come up to my room after tea.”
Throughout luncheon, Sir Richard talked to
Gerald about the South African War and the
Cork Militia. He liked the young fellow. Laurence
talked to Marda about whaling, Lady Naylor
and Francie continued the Aberdeens, Lois tried
to explain to Hugo about Augustus John. The
rain stopped, they agreed that it had been only a
shower. Lois and Gerald were side by side, but
they did not have to speak, they simply passed
things. The side of her next to Gerald felt numb.
“Raspberries?” she said towards the end of the
meal, constrainedly.
“Please.” He was not nervous at all. Queer,
she confusedly thought, how men throw off action
without a quiver at severance from the self that
goes into it. They remain complete, the action
hangs in the air of the place, above the grass or
furniture, crystallizing in memory; eternal, massive
and edged to the touch of thought as, to the
bodily touch, a grand piano. She herself felt bound
to all she had done emotionally. But his kissing
of her, his attack, were no longer part of him. He
concentrated upon his raspberries, crushing them,
on his cream with carmine beautifully folding
through, on his flushing sugar. She watched the
work on his plate. “Magnificent,” he said to Sir
Richard, agreeing about the Cork Militia.
Going out through the hall, Laurence offered
Gerald a cigarette. “American—extra mild.”
“Thanks—I—”
“How is your jazz band?”
“Very little practising; not much time, you see.”
“Do tell me: did you kill anybody?”
“How much?” said Gerald, startled.
“Anybody last night?”
“Oh, good Lord, no!”
“Isn’t that why you go out?”
“We were looking for arms, really. And nights
you find the most surprising people at home. We
were after a fellow called Peter Connor: we got
him.”
“Fight?” said Laurence eagerly.
“He was at home, in bed. These blighters
think we are greater fools than we are.”
“Very cynical of him.... Oh, I say, Uncle
Richard, Lesworth has captured Peter Connor.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” said Sir Richard,
flushing severely. “His mother is dying. However,
I suppose you must do your duty. We must
remember to send up now and inquire for Mrs.
Michael Connor. We’ll send some grapes. The
poor woman—it seems too bad.” He went off,
sighing, into the library.
Gerald was horrified. His duty, so bright and
abstract, had come suddenly under the shadowy
claw of the personal. “I had no idea,” he exclaimed
to Laurence, “these people were friends
of yours.”
“Can’t be helped,” said Laurence. “I dare say
he was a dirty dog.... If you hate that cigarette,
Lesworth, have one of your own. It seems a long
time since we have seen you. How is this war of
yours really going? Do you realize I know nothing—this
might all just as well be going on in the
Balkans. I sometimes rather wish that I were a
gunman. There are one or two things I should
like to ask—but don’t let me keep you if you want
to talk to anyone else.”
“Rather not.”
The ladies were in the drawing-room laughing
intimately, putting across the open door a barrier
of exclusion. Laurence and Gerald wandered
about the hall, taking note of each other indirectly
and amicably. Laurence was by three years the
younger, but imposed his own impression of
seniority. Light hair tumbling, eyes startled open
and limp grey flannels, he looked to Gerald as
though he had slept through the morning. While
Gerald circled, the grey glove lay on the table, its
fingers crisped in derision. Outside, in an irresponsible
burst of sunshine, the wet fields had a
metallic brightness. Gerald thought of Lois’s
shoulders, their rounded squareness, the feel of
wet frieze under his grip. He was flattered but
uneasy under Laurence’s interest, which had indeed,
for the simple, the awkward menace of some one
preparing to cast a net. He pursed his lips to a
whistle and shrugged slightly.
“For instance, what do you, personally, think
about all this?”
“Well, my opinion is—”
“Oh, but I don’t want your opinion, I want
your point of view.”
“Well, the situation’s rotten. But right is
right.”
“Why?”
“Well ... from the point of view of civilization.
Also, you see, they don’t fight clean.”
“Oh, there’s no public school spirit in Ireland.
But do tell me—what do you mean by the point of
view of civilization?”
“Oh—ours.”
Laurence smiled his appreciation: the conviction,
stated without arrogance, had a ring of integrity.
Gerald, embarrassed by this benevolence,
had recourse again to the back of his head, so
gratifyingly polished. “If you come to think,”
he explained, “I mean, looking back on history—not
that I’m intellectual—we do seem the only
people.”
“Difficulty being to make them see it.”
“—And that we have what they really want ...
though of course the more one thinks of it all,
the smaller, personally, it makes one feel.”
“Oh? I don’t feel small in that way. But I’m
not English—”
“Oh, no—I beg your pardon.”
“—Thank God.”
“Don’t understand?”
“God may. Shall we look for the others?”
Gerald, shocked, preceded Laurence into the
drawing-room. Their conversation, torn off rough
at this edge, seemed doomed from its very nature
to incompletion. Gerald would have wished to
explain that no one could have a sounder respect
than himself and his country for the whole principle
of nationality, and that it was with some awareness
of misdirection, even of paradox, that he was out
here to hunt and shoot the Irish. His alertness
was blunted, while he approached the ladies, by a
slight stupor of effort; he was groping for something
Napoleon had once said, something remarkably
neat and apposite that Gerald had once copied
into a pocket-book. Laurence had not hoped to
explain, but had wished that Gerald could infer,
that there was a contrariety in the notions they
each had of this thing civilization. As a rather
perplexing system of niceties, Laurence saw it;
an exact and delicate interrelation of stresses between
being and being, like crossing arches; an unemotioned
kindness withering to assertion selfish or
racial; silence cold with a comprehension in which
the explaining clamour died away. He foresaw
in it the end of art, of desire, as it would be the
end of battle, but it was to this end, this faceless
but beautiful negation that he had lifted a glass
inwardly while he had said, “Thank God!”
Gerald knew that no one who spoke of God in
that family way could have any belief. He had
heard that Oxford was full of Socialism, of a wrongness
that was the outcome of too much thinking,
and in the light of this it did appear to him that
Laurence’s conversation had been decidedly Sinn
Fein. But he liked and respected Lois’s cousin,
who made a man of one by that naïve curiosity as
to bloodshed—curiosity to which Gerald had been a
stranger since the days of the Boy’s Own Paper
spread on the nursery floor. Also, he could not
have looked so consistently bored at parties if he
had not been, as they all said, very intellectual.
Lois, watching Gerald approach with an absence
of smile that was almost a shadow, was certain she
must have done him injustice. His constraint
(the pursuit of Napoleon) had a rather grave beauty.
Their kiss under the high ceiling must be present
and palpable to him also. Aware of some growth
of manliness in him, she wanted the feel of his lips
again, to capture what she had missed before.
And a quick glance of Marda’s from one to the
other sealed their mood with a recognition.
“Can’t we go out?” she said generally, for Gerald
to take up.
“It will rain again in a minute,” said Lady Naylor,
glancing cynically at the weather. And indeed
a few drops already sparkled against the sunshine.
“Also I particularly want to talk to Mr. Lesworth.
When he comes he is always playing tennis, or I
forget. But now there are some things I really
want to ask him ... I really want his point of
view ...”
She sat down in a faded bowery chair, settling
herself with a rustle of expectation. Francie,
attracted, trailed her skirts and her fancy work
down the sofa; Marda, putting a new cigarette in
her holder, leaned over the back. From the constellation
of eager faces Lois wandered away.
The three were no more her enemies than were
her own irresolution or the bright vicious raindrops
blotting the pane. Yet their unforeseen combination
defeated her finally. She yawned at the outlook.
“Lois, don’t yawn,” said her aunt. “Now I
want to know, Mr. Lesworth, what Colonel Boatley
really thinks of reprisals. Of course it will go no
further, though you mustn’t think I want you to
be indiscreet.... Laurence, just shut the door.”
Laurence shut himself out. And Gerald, sitting
down with a sigh, said that of course it was all rather
a problem. He caught Marda’s eye, dark and
bright with amusement, and read there the doom of
his afternoon.
“Yes? Yes? Yes? This is so interesting—you
were asking me, weren’t you, Francie, and I
said we would ask Mr. Lesworth.... Marda,
do listen, dear, never mind, shake your ash on the
carpet, you mustn’t miss this. Because these days
when so much nonsense is talked on both sides I
do feel one owes it to speak on some good authority—unless
Mr. Lesworth would rather we didn’t.
Now please go on!”
And Gerald, half hypnotized, consciously barren
and not in his Colonel’s confidence, repeated to
them what he had read in the Morning Post. As
Lady Naylor said at the time, no one would dream
of taking the Morning Post seriously, it was so anti-Irish,
but an opinion on it from anyone so much
“in things” as Mr. Lesworth was well worth
hearing. And as she said afterwards, it was
extraordinary how no amount of experience shook
these young Englishmen up. Their minds remained
cutting-books.
XII
AN armoured car called for Gerald at four
o’clock and he was driven away through
the rain. Towards the end of the afternoon
he had become very dull, a kind of fog came
over his personality; he confessed he was sleepy.
Lady Naylor remarked what a pity it was he could
not stay for his tea, that would have freshened him
up again. There was still so much that she wanted
to know. The drawing-room became to Gerald
fantastic and thin like an ice-palace, and, reflected
backwards and forwards in tall mirrors, seemed
like a chain of galleries at Versailles down which,
numbing with admiration, he had to advance
wearily. He did not see Lois alone any more.
She kept coming in, looking round vaguely, then
going upstairs again. Upstairs, he could hear her
playing the gramophone. She came out to the
steps with Marda to see him off; they stood with
arms linked, brushing the rain from their hair.
The last they saw of him was a putteed leg being
drawn in carefully. Something steel slid to; they
waved, but never a hand came out. The machine
seemed already to be digesting. He was swept
from them with martial impersonality.
At half-past five Lois went to the top of the
house with her drawing-books, paused for confidence,
tickled a panel of Marda’s door. Coming
into the changed and vivid room, she tipped her
drawing-books disengagedly on to a window-seat.
Marda sat on the writing-table, engaged in manicure.
Little pots, pads and bottles paraded; a
chamois leather was spread on her knee. A sweet
smell of varnish, like pear-drops, was in the air.
“The most I can do,” said Lois, intent, “is to
keep mine clean.”
“Quite enough. It’s just this habit of making
up every part of one that’s exposed at all....
Lois, have a cigarette?”
“Oh ... thanks. You don’t mind my coming?”
“My dear, why?”
“What lovely brushes! What a ... what an
uncommon photograph frame!”
“Yes, that’s Leslie Lawe.”
“Oh? Oh yes,” Lois paused uncertainly. “How
good looking! Do—do you know him well?”
“Very. We’re engaged.”
“Oh, how lovely!” Lois had a shock of flatness.
“Oh, yes; didn’t you know?”
“Well, I thought you probably would be. Shall
you live in London?”
“I suppose we shall. I suppose we shall have
to.”
“Oh, how lovely!”
Marda laughed and began screwing on the lids
of her little pots. In the light of her brilliant life,
her deftness seemed to Lois inimitable. One
would have had to have lived twenty-nine years as
fast, as surely and wildly, to screw pink celluloid
caps on to small white pots with just that lightness
of finger-tip, just that degree of amusement, just
that detachment in smile and absorption in attitude.
And the pink smell of nail-varnish, dresses
trickling over a chair, flash of swinging shoe-buckle,
cloud of powder over the glass, the very room with
its level stare on the tree-tops, took on awareness,
smiled with secrecy, had the polish and depth of
experience. The very birds on the frieze flew round
in cognizant agitation.
“What a lovely dress!” said Lois, picking up
the end of a red sleeve, so that she seemed to be
standing hand in hand with the dress.
“Vienna.”
“And, oh, what a lovely green one!... Am I
pawing things?”
“I like it. But haven’t you got some drawings?”
“Drawings? Oh, my drawings! Oh—I’m
afraid they’d bore you.”
“I don’t expect so.”
“Well, I did just happen to bring them along.”
She had brought two drawing-books, cheerful
in mottled bindings with tissue between the pages.
She brought them across to Marda, then turned
away. The drawings, in black ink, illustrated
the Morte d’Arthur and Omar Khayyam. They
remembered Beardsley. Lois, away at a window,
heard Marda rustle the tissue paper: she watched
the rain intently. Beyond the demesne trees, a
farm cart rattled along the road. Marda, conscientious,
turned back to the title page. Here she
paused, for Lois had printed out, in uncertain
Gothic:
“‘I am a painter who cannot paint;
In my life, a devil rather than saint;
In my brain, as poor a creature too:
No end to all that I cannot do!
But do one thing at least I can—
Love a man or hate a man
Supremely—’
Lois Honoria Farquar: Her Book.”
“Oh,” said Marda.
“Browning.”
“But can you really?”
“I don’t see why not.”
“And are you sure that you can’t paint? Have
you ever tried?”
“I hated two of the girls at school and I really
rather do hate Mr. Montmorency. And I can’t
help getting involved with people. Personal relations
make a perfect havoc of me; my headmistress
said so. Of course I haven’t had much scope here,
so far. Being grown up seems trivial, somehow.
I mean, dressing and writing notes instead of letters,
and trying to make impressions. When you have
to think so much of what other people feel about
you there seems no time to think what you feel
about them. Everybody is genial at one in a
monotonous kind of way. I don’t seem to find
young men inspiring, somehow. I suppose I shall.
Did you ever have any difficulty about beginning?”
“I can’t remember. I never can see back to
the other side of things that have happened.”
“I think I must cut that title page out. I wrote
it when I was rather young. But surely love
wouldn’t get so much talked about if there were
not something in it? I mean even soap, you know,
however much they advertise ...”
“Oh, there must be. Let me look at the
drawings.”
Marda, still on the table with crossed knees,
spread out the book briskly. But Lois, all in a
glow, could not help remarking: “Somebody told
me I was neurotic.”
“I shouldn’t worry.”
With a brutality of which she was unaware
Marda returned to the drawings. Lois, thinking:
“I do not interest her,” sat down on the floor with
her back to the chest of drawers. Over the mottled
carpet curled strange pink fronds: some one dead
now, buying this carpet, had responded to an idea
of beauty. Lois thought how in Marda’s bedroom,
when she was married, there might be a dark blue
carpet with a bloom on it like a grape, and how
this room, this hour would be forgotten. Already
the room seemed full of the dusk of oblivion. And
she hoped that instead of fading to dust in summers
of empty sunshine, the carpet would burn with the
house in a scarlet night to make one flaming call
upon Marda’s memory. Lois again realized that
no one had come for her, after all. She thought,
“I must marry Gerald.”
But with a jump of the heart she heard every
page turn over. She received the print of each
look as though her sensibility were the paper.
Reactions to Lois’s drawings were as a rule momentary
and staccato: “My dear!... They’re sinister
... what a marvellous muezzin!... Aren’t
those the seven queens?” And indeed it had come
to seem to herself that the drawings must really
mean something. A glance at them, though she
had lost the power to see them, gave her the kind
of surprised assurance one might expect from
motherhood.
Marda said nothing; once or twice she changed
her attitude, shifting the book from knee to knee.
Soot, dislodged by the rain, sifted sharply on to the
paper fan in the grate, startling them to an exchange
of glances. Then she said deliberately, closing
the drawing-book:
“I think you’re cleverer than you can draw, you
know.”
“Oh—”
“You don’t mind, do you? Look—have another
cigarette. Why can’t you write, or something?”
“That’s so embarrassing. Even things like—like
elephants get so personal.”
“I know. I give up reading—I’m sick of their
personal elephants.... Or act? But why do
you stay here?”
“I can’t think,” said Lois, startled.
“You like to be the pleasant young person?”
“I like to be in a pattern.” She traced a pink
frond with her finger. “I like to be related; to have
to be what I am. Just to be is so intransitive, so
lonely.”
“Then you will like to be a wife and mother.”
Marda got off the writing-table and began to
change her stockings. “Jacob’s ladder,” she
explained. “It’s a good thing we can always be
women.”
“I hate women. But I can’t think how to begin
to be anything else.”
“Climate.”
“But I would hate to be a man. So much fuss
about doing things. Except Laurence—but he is
such a hog. Ought I to go to London?”
“Ever been abroad?”
Of course she had not, she said, because of the
War, and of course she would like to. There was
Rome, and she would like to stay in a hotel by
herself.—There was just “abroad”: she always
wondered how long the feeling lasted. And there
was America, but one would have to have introductions
or one would get a crick in one’s neck from
just always looking up at things. She would like
to feel real in London. She had never come out
through a pass and looked down on little distinct
white cities with no smoke. She had never been
in a tunnel for more than five minutes—she had
heard there were tunnels in which you could nearly
suffocate? She had never seen anything larger
than she could imagine. She wanted, she said, to
see backgrounds without bits taken out of them by
Holy Families; small black trees running up and
down white hills. She thought the little things
would be important: trees with electric lights growing
out of them, she had heard of; coloured syphons.
She wanted to go wherever the War hadn’t. She
wanted to go somewhere nonchalant where politics
bored them, where bands played out of doors in the
hot nights and nobody wished to sleep. She
wanted to go into cathedrals unadmonished and
look up unprepared into the watery deep strangeness.
There must be perfect towns where shadows
were strong like buildings, towns secret without
coldness, unaware without indifference. She liked
mountains, but she did not care for views. She
did not want adventures, but she would like just
once to be nearly killed. She wanted to see something
that only she would remember. Could one
really float a stone in a glacier stream? She liked
unmarried sorts of places. She did not want to
see the Taj Mahal or the Eiffel Tower (could one
avoid it?) or to go to Switzerland or Berlin or any
of the Colonies. She would like to know people
and go to dinner parties on terraces, and she thought
it would be a pity to miss love. Could one travel
alone? She did not mind being noticed because
she was a female, she was tired of being not noticed
because she was a lady. She could not imagine
ever not wanting some one to talk to about tea-time.
If she went to Cook’s, could they look
out all the trains for her, in Spain and everywhere?
She had never been to Cook’s. Was there any law
about selling tickets to people under age?
Marda, smoothing the last wrinkle out of a stocking
and fastening up a suspender, said she did not
believe this was so.
“Of course anybody could do all that. But it
would not be me.”
“But be interested in what happens to you for
its own sake; don’t expect to be touched or changed—or
to be in anything that you do. One just
watches. Pain is one’s misunderstanding.”
The advice, fruit of her own relation to experience,
unwisdom, lacking the sublimer banality,
was—as she suspected while still speaking—to her
young friend meaningless and without value. The
infinite variance of that relation breaks the span
of comprehension between being and being and
makes an attempt at sympathy the merest fumbling
for outlet along the boundaries of the self. Lois
looked vaguely out at the sky, and thought how she
could not possibly travel in Europe with a green
canvas trunk with her school initials. She longed
for three leather suitcases. She said sadly:
“The thought of places without one is so lonely.”
“Pull yourself together, my dear child.”
“Don’t you think honeymoons are great waste of
travelling?”
“That reminds—I must write a letter. Don’t
go—look, have another cigarette. What is the
date?”
“I don’t know. Does it matter?”
Evidently it did matter; Marda had to unpack
the bottom of a suitcase and look the date up in a
pocket-book. And from this Lois immediately
concluded Leslie must be one of those keen square
people who did not care for girls of nineteen, whose
eyes slid past one’s look impatiently, who had no
enthusiasms and read the biographies of politicians
other than Disraeli. She heard Marda writing
with little pauses and gushes; her shoulders and the
stoop of her head took on an appearance of obligation.
Lois thought how anxious to marry Marda
must really be, how anxious not to frighten Leslie
away from her, and how all her distantness and her
quick, rejecting air must be a false effect, accidental
and transitory.
“I think,” she said, “I must be a woman’s
woman.”
“Oh yes. Where are we going to tennis to-morrow?”
“Castle Trent—but we won’t because of the
rain. Is Mr. Lawe very social?”
“Reasonably. Of course, he likes his people
nice. What was the name of the man at lunch—surname?”
“Lesworth. Gerald is very social. He smiles
all the time like a dog. Do you think that is good
in a man?”
“I am telling Leslie he wants to marry you—may
I?”
“Will it give Mr. Lawe a good impression?”
“Well, it furnishes you rather. And I can’t
think what else to say.”
“Don’t scratch it out,” said Lois after an interval,
“but as a matter of fact he didn’t speak of marriage.
He merely kissed me. The English have quite a
different moral standard.”
“Besides, he had been up all night.”
“What are men one is engaged to like?”
“Very worried and kind,” said Marda, blotting
a sheet of her letter. “Business-like, passionate
and accurate. When they press you against their
chests a paper crackles, and when you sit up again
to do your face and arrange your hair, they cough
and pull out the paper, all folded and say: ‘While I
think of it, I just wanted to consult you about this.’
Dinner services come crashing through the air
like in a harlequinade. You feel you have been
kissed in a shop. I cannot be adequate. I suggested
writing to those public schools for vacancies
for our three little boys, but that was not nice
apparently. When you are engaged you live in
the future, and a large part of the future is improper
till it has happened.”
“Oh ... what would happen now if you lost
your engagement ring?” asked Lois with enjoyment.
“I daren’t wear it. Oh, look here, I am talking
like a fool. I’m sorry, Lois, but you really must
not talk to me when I am writing letters. I need
Leslie. Dinner services don’t matter. If you
never need anyone as much you will be fortunate.
I don’t know for myself what is worth while. I’m
sick of all this trial and error. Will you find a
book or something? Don’t go!”
Lois did not wish to go, but thought “Why
should she keep me here when she is thinking about
Leslie?” She felt deprived and unhappy. She
tried to imagine a situation in which Leslie would
look ridiculous. She prayed that the three correct
little boys might never be born. She hoped he
would have five daughters, and all artistic. “One
thing more,” she said, “how is it that men are so
seldom photographed in profile? Do they have to
look frank?”
Steps coming down the gallery, relentlessly, with
intention, might have been Leslie’s but were unmistakably
Laurence’s.
Laurence tapped and remarked through the door
that his Aunt Myra wanted to know if the letters
were ready. Timothy would be starting now; he
could wait five minutes, but if he did would almost
certainly miss the post.
“Damn!” said Marda.
“What d’you say?”
“Oh, come in. Why did I polish my nails?”
Laurence sat down on the window-sill. He was
annoyed and surprised to find Lois present. He
suspected that she had been bothering Marda,
confiding, fidgeting, asking about love and wishing
to try on her hats. Probably she had brought up a
poetry book and kept coming across with a thumb
on the margin to point out the bits she loved. He
wished that Lois would marry and leave Danielstown;
he could perfectly see her as a very pink
bride, later as a girl wife in the Tchehov tradition
in a pink blouse, sucking sweets audibly, prattling
of girl friends’ lovers, rustling papers endlessly.
He only hoped that she might marry Gerald, who
had no papers to rustle.
“I hope,” he said, “that Lois has been amusing
you?”
“Don’t talk,” said Lois. “I mean, she wants to
finish her letter.”
“Evidently,” said Laurence.
“Explain Leslie,” said Marda, writing rapidly.
“It will help at dinner.”
“She is engaged,” said Lois, “to a Mr. Lawe.
That is his photograph there. His name is Leslie.”
“Oh yes,” said Laurence.
“He is not comic,” said Marda, leaning around
and pushing the letter away. “She makes him
sound so—like ‘a Mr. Wilkinson, a clergyman.’
Lady Naylor will like it all, but I haven’t told her.
Will you help Mr. Montmorency and Lois form a
public opinion and not be surprised when I talk
about him at dinner? About the end of the fish,
I thought.... I cannot finish this letter; it will
have to go to-morrow and I will wire.”
“And I have a piece of news for you. Castle
Trent was raided for arms last night. Of course
they didn’t find any. They think the thing was
entirely amateur, nothing to do with the I.R.A. at
all. They took away some boots. The Trents
think one of the raiders was a gardener’s cousin
from Ballydarra who hates the family. He left a
quite unnecessary message behind with a skull and
crossbones; he sounds to me rather a silly man. I
am hoping perhaps they will come here to-night.
We have two assegais and a stiletto that Uncle
Richard uses for a paper-knife.”
“It is a paper-knife,” said Lois, “only made so as
to look like a stiletto. How perfectly thrilling; do
let us all sit up.”
“I shall sit up, but you had better go to bed.
You might be insulted.”
“Really, I am not so female as all that.”
Laurence shrugged his shoulders.
“At any rate, don’t tell the others. Uncle
Richard’ll get fussy and spoil it, and if Aunt Myra
meets them she will keep them talking all night.”
“It seems so odd,” said Laurence, “that she
should be my blood aunt and not yours.”
Marda looked at him thoughtfully over the back
of her chair. She had not realized he could be so
disagreeable. If he did not take care, he would
grow up just like Mr. Montmorency. She told
him so, and added that she was surprised he did
not appreciate Lois. “She is very charming,”
she said, “and very intelligent. Think of all the
cousins you might have had. It’s not her fault
that you’re not in Tahiti or Valladolid or wherever
it was you wanted to go this summer. If I were
not going to marry I should ask her to come abroad
with me. I have never been less bored.”
“It would be marvellous,” said Lois. Now that
Laurence had come in she felt more alone with
Marda, and nearer; she could think of all the things
she had wanted to say. Intoxicated by being told
she was charming and by Laurence’s disapproval,
she hitched herself up on to the end of the wooden
bed, where she sat swinging her legs and smiling,
all girlhood. She felt movement, a wind in her
face as though she were on the prow of a ship.
With a bound, life carried her forward again. She
felt certain that Leslie would die or break off the
engagement. “Marvellous,” she repeated.
“At any rate,” Laurence said, “you can ask her
to be a bridesmaid.” And there was Lois, forlorn
in the aisle, with hot air coming up her legs from a
grating and tears dripping off her nose into a bunch
of chrysanthemums. She would keep the ribbon
from her bouquet and show it to Gerald in confidence
while she unpacked on their wedding night.
“I am thinking of going abroad quite soon,” she
said to Laurence.
“Mr. Montmorency has gone for a walk,” said
Laurence. “He had to take an umbrella. Apparently
he does not usually take an umbrella, but
when he was half-way down the avenue Mrs. Montmorency
suddenly said he must, because it had
never rained like this before. So she took an
umbrella and one for herself and started off down the
avenue after him. Aunt Myra said she should not
have done this because of her heart and looked round
for me, but I had gone quickly into the dining-room,
which is the last place anybody would look
for one between meals. So she found Uncle
Richard and he took another umbrella and ran
quickly down the avenue after Mrs. Montmorency,
telling her not to run like that. When he had
caught her up he took the umbrella from her and
went still more quickly, shouting, after Mr. Montmorency,
who pretended not to hear and walked
on with a back view of positive hatred.”
“But how do you know all this if you were in the
dining-room?”
“When they were under way I went to the library
window and looked after them.... Lois, did
Lesworth tell you he has captured Peter Connor?
He was in bed, apparently.”
“Laurence!” called Lady Naylor from the end
of the gallery. “Where are you? What about
Marda’s letters?... They can’t go now,” she
went on, approaching. “Timothy waited ten
minutes, and now he has got to run all the way, but
he will certainly miss the post.... Oh, you are
all here?”
She looked at her nephew and niece disparagingly
and sat down on the bed. “It is an extraordinary
thing,” she said generally, “the way nobody in this
house can be trusted to remember messages....
It has been a tiring day,” she added. “Nobody
could be nicer than that young Mr. Lesworth, but
certainly he is not intelligent. And since then
they have all been running down the avenue with
umbrellas. And oh, what do you think? They
have been raided for arms at Castle Trent. They
think the whole thing must have been organized
by their gardener’s cousin. They took some boots
away.”
XIII
WHEN they had all gone to bed, lamps
downstairs extinguished, doors upstairs
shut with a rattle upon the last voices,
Francie talked of Marda’s engagement and said
she was glad. She was glad as a wife that the net
should be flung wider. She talked, but Hugo did
not answer; he was still too angry about the umbrella
to speak when they were alone. So till well on into
the night they lay beside each other under the darkness
in an intent and angry silence. Then she
wept and said they should never have come back to
Danielstown.
“It’s as though I couldn’t remember where anything
was.”
“Look here, if you can’t sleep, you’d better take
something.”
“Hugo!”
“Oh, I suppose this place disagrees with you, too.”
He had designed an insult, he could not bear her
to intrude upon his wakefulness. Whichever way
he turned in that mournful freedom—and the perspectives
of his regret opened fanwise, profound
avenues each white at the end with a faceless statue—she
would come stumbling after him, hand to
heart. “Try and sleep,” he said, and sent her
away angrily.
She feigned sleep rigidly, hardly bearing to lie
there. Her mind clenched tight, like a fist, at the
isolation of this proximity. She longed to resume
the life of day downstairs in the empty rooms. She
had lain awake in the South of France hearing palm
trees creak in the gritty and dry wind, hooked-back
shutters rattle against the wall; she had lain awake
in town with her room a battle of lights through
the thin blinds, lights like her thoughts, flashing
and crossing— But across this battle-piece, under
the long lances, had swarmed, like Ucello’s roses,
small comforts, a kind of content at suffering, the
tenderness of imagined contact. She had wept
because he was not with her. Now a nostalgia for
that solitude, for a wall so patient and smooth to
the reaching hand where there was now a sleeper,
came on her, quenching tears. He thought she slept.
But, “I remember,” she said, about two o’clock,
“a Miss Lawe. I met her last in a tram in Dublin.
I remember then she was talking of a nephew—I
wonder would that be Leslie?”
“Did she say his name?”
“I can’t remember; I got out of the tram....
Hugo, I’m so thirsty.”
Sighing, he got out of bed.
Laurence could not sleep either. There must
have been something at dinner.... He longed
for the raiders and strained his ears in the silence—which
had, like the darkness, a sticky and stifling
texture, like cobwebs, muffling the senses. The
rain had paused, the trees had shed the weight of
it, never a drop came through them or tapped on
his window-sill. Once he heard, he thought, a
fleet of bicycles in the avenue; he sat up propped
on his palms, assembled his attitude, and was prepared
to go down and admit the party courteously.
He meant to offer them bread and apples and
leisurely conversation—and jam and whisky, but
in relating the incident he would only mention the
bread and apples, he liked that smack of austerity,
an Oriental graveness. But there were no bicycles;
no one knocked; all he had to say went sour in him.
It was only some cattle come up close to the house,
rubbing against the wires. They moved away.
He lit a candle, blinked at the startled flame and
blew it out again. Darkness resumed, with a
discomfortable suggestion of normality. There
seemed proof that the accident of day, of action,
need not recur. And from this blank full stop, this
confrontation of a positive futurelessness, his mind
ran spiderlike back on the thread spun out of itself
for advance, stumbling and swerving a little over
its own intricacy. He caught trains he had missed,
rushing out to the boundless possible from the
shining mouths of termini, re-ordered meals in a
cosmopolitan blue, re-ate them, thought of thought
but sheered away from that windy gulf full of a
fateful clapping of empty book-covers. Far enough
back, in a kind of unborn freedom, he even re-made
marriages. Laura Naylor gave Hugo, scoffingly,
bridal tenderness; they had four sons and all hurried
out to coarsen in Canada. Here, in this that had
been her room, Laura had lain on her wedding
morning, watching a spider run up the canopy of
the bed, while Hugo made ready, five miles off, to be
driven over to take her hand at the altar by poor
John Trent, and the four young sons in excitement
jiggled among the cherubim. And it was Richard
who married Francie, who came to him all in a
bloom at his first request and made a kind of a
basinette of a life for him, dim with lace. Aunt
Myra enjoyed a vigorous celibacy, while Laurence,
to be acclaimed a second Weiniger, blew out his
brains at—say—Avila, in a fit of temporary discouragement
without having heard of Danielstown.
Lois, naturally, was not born at all.
But this involved a certain re-arrangement of
Laurence’s character, for not for anything would
he have put a pistol into his mouth, though he would
have liked to fire a gun out of a window. This
neglect of the raiders pricked his egotism. And
alarmed by the dragging tick of the watch under his
pillow, slowing down as at the mortal sickness of
Time, he turned over and thought in a fury that
he could not think why Laura should have married
Mr. Farquar. The rudest man in Ulster he was,
with a disagreeably fresh complexion and an eye
like a horse. Her confusion had clotted up in the
air of the room and seemed, in that closest darkness
under the ceiling, to be still impending. Here,
choked in the sweep of the bed-curtains, she had
writhed in those epic rages; against Hugo, against
Richard, against any prospect in life at all; biting
the fat resistant pillows. Until once she had risen,
fluttered at her reflection, dabbed her eyes, buttoned
a tight sleek dress of that day’s elegance over her
heaving bosom, packed her dresses in arched trunks
(that had come back since to rot in the attics) and
driven off, averting from the stare of the house an
angry profile. Hotly, she went up North to attract
and marry Mr. Farquar. It was in her to have
done otherwise, but there is a narrow and fixed
compulsion, Laurence recognized, inside the widest
ranges of our instability.
Below, through the floor, a light drawling scrape
climbed into stuttering melody, syncopated dance
music, ghostly with the wagging of hips and horrid
in darkness. Lois, child of that unwise marriage,
was playing the gramophone. Laurence listened,
paralysed with indignation, then reached out and
banged a chair on the floor. She attended; the
music broke off with a shock, there was a tingling
calm, as after an amputation. He above, she below,
they thought of each other with outrage.
Certainly, thought Laurence, there must have
been something at dinner.
But Sir Richard and Lady Naylor were soundly
asleep. She was dreaming about the Aberdeens,
while he rode round the country on a motor-bicycle
from which he could not detach himself. His
friends cut him; he discovered he was a Black and
Tan. But night rolled on over them thickly and
uneventfully. The others exhausted themselves
to sleep. The darkness clamped round their
waking brains did not any one moment seem to
abate its insane pressure; only, within an hour of
breakfast they found themselves restored without
reason to the illusion of daylight. With a kind of
fatedness, a passivity, they resumed the operation of
living.
The morning gave birth to a disappointment.
Livvy arrived just as Lois was starting out for the
village with Marda to send the telegram. Her
horse was lame so she came over on a bicycle, and
certainly, thought Lois, watching her lean the
bicycle into the privet hedge, there were many
things about Livvy that were a pity. For Marda
stood at the top of the steps in a green jumper,
fanning the telegraph form on the air to dry the
ink. The green, queer and metallic, cut surprisingly
into the steamy tones of the house and the
morning. She would be gone in three days. And
now while Livvy settled her hat and her front and
prepared for speech, Marda, smiling, came down the
steps and walked away down the avenue, not caring.
She missed nobody. The dogs went with her:
gloomily Lois’s eyes went after their wagging sterns.
“Listen,” said Livvy, clutching Lois’s elbow.
“Ah, listen, Lois: what is the matter?—That is a
natty jumper she’s got. I wonder, has she the
pattern? Of course, it’s partly her figure. I wonder
now that she didn’t marry.... Lois, will
we go up to your room?”
Lois did not believe the bed was made. Livvy
blushed in her little defined way and said she wished
to be confidential. So they went into the drawing-room—where
Gerald’s kiss was hanging: all the
doubts of the night could not disperse it—and
leaned on the grand piano. Lois was surprised to
notice Livvy breathing on to her breast-bone and
drawing something up on a long blue ribbon from
intimate depths. A ring dangled. “No one could
be more surprised than myself,” said Livvy modestly,
averting her eyes from a finger on which the ring
had flowered.
“Oh, well done!” Lois could have exclaimed with
spontaneity. Checking this, she said doubtfully:
“Oh, my dear ...”
“Who do you guess?”
“Mr.... Mr. Armstrong.”
“Aren’t you quick! Listen—swear that you
won’t tell. For my father doesn’t know and I
think he’d kill me.”
“How did you ... how did he ...”
“Well, it was like this. You see, he asked me
at Mrs. Fogarty’s when would he see me again,
and I said I might be going to Cork to the dentist
Thursday, and he said he might be going to Cork
too. So I thought no more of it. Think what I
felt when, I getting out at the station, I saw him
there standing as large as life and watching the
train like a dog. So he asked me where was I
going for tea, so I said if I wasn’t alone I might
have dropped in at the Imperial because of the band,
but that my father didn’t like me to go there alone
because of the officers. He said would I go with
him, and it was raining and my appointment wasn’t
till half-past five, so I said that we ought not to be
seen together, but I turned my hat right down
and we went in and heard the band. He seemed
very much confused, so I asked him was there
anything on his mind and he said there wasn’t and
I said there must be. So he went very scarlet and
pulled his belt and looked up at the ceiling and said
he did love me. Then the waiter came with the
tea and I only hope he will not recognize me again.
When the waiter had gone I said he might speak
lower, and he said he couldn’t because of the band.
Then I said that of course a thing like this came as
a shock to a girl, and he said did it, and I said indeed
it did. I said I was not sure if I could get accustomed
to the idea of marriage at all, and he looked
very much surprised. I said when would he wish
it to be? And he said the worst of it was he had
no prospects. I said we Irish were not mercenary,
and that anyway I knew he had an uncle— It
was a great disadvantage to me, Lois, having to
keep down so low under my hat all the time—for I
could see the Hartigans’ aunt, Mrs. Foxe-O’Connor,
the other side of a palm-tree, and a man my father
buys cattle from kept rising up and staring round
the room. And what with this and my being
naturally very much confused, and David creaking
about in his chair, and the band, I don’t know how
much he heard of what I said at all.
“However, we thought it might be well to buy a
ring, though I can’t wear it. David looked quite
wandering and I had to get him across the traffic.
And I felt pretty curious myself. You see, we have
neither of us been engaged before, though I have
had two offers. Then he said he must go to the
barracks, so he put me into a tram to go to the
dentist’s. Presently I noticed it was the wrong
tram, but I hadn’t the heart to get out till it was
round the corner after the trouble he’d taken, the
poor boy. But the tram kind of bolted and I got
out near the Cathedral and had to take a very expensive
car. I was late at the dentist’s—he had out
two of my teeth.”
All in a dream, it appeared, Livvy had wandered
through wet residential Cork. All in a dream she
had sat and bled from the gums in a train. She
opened her mouth to show the two holes the dentist
had made as though they were wounds of love, and
Lois looked into them solemnly. Had they kissed
at all? No, they had not had the opportunity.
They could have taken a cab, but Livvy did not
think it moral to drive in a cab with a man, for it
roused his passions. Lois said she thought the smell
inside of a cab would put anyone off, and Livvy
said that in that case a cab would be waste of money.
“But can he marry? Can a second lieutenant?”
“Oh, I can wait some years. But I shall go and
stay with his relations and wear a ring and all, so
that there need not be any uncertainty.”
“Why not tell your father now and have it announced?”
said Lois hopefully. She watched her
own face looking up from the mottled piano-top
and felt very singular, distant and destined, like
Melisande. “I don’t think,” she said, “that I
should be afraid of your father.”
For Livvy’s father seemed really a very despondent,
mild man with a yellow drooping moustache
that he had always to lift up over the edge of his
teacup. It was hard to picture his chasing around
after Livvy with a blackthorn, or smiting his fist
on the dinner-table so that (as Livvy declared) the
plates leaped, or going down with the half of a tart
in his hand to destroy the cook. The worst she had
seen him do, when Livvy was late, was to take his
watch out and stand with his thumb on the lid—not
looking at it, as though he could not abide the
thought of Time—while two or three bubbles ran
up his throat. He was a widower: Livvy declared
her mother had died of him. He was a teetotaller:
half a decanter of whisky was in his tantalus, but he
had lost the key. Lois now assured Livvy her
father would be the ideal father-in-law; she was sure
that David would like him. He would come and
stay and be so absolutely unobtrusive.
“He has a prejudice against Army officers,” said
Livvy despondently. “He wouldn’t mind if it
was the Navy—but what chance have I, living so
far inland? If David was a general with gold all
down his front and spoke of marriage, I think he’d
still kill him. He says I’ll get the house burnt
over his head with my goings on.”
“But if he heard you’d been compromised at the
Imperial?”
“A girl can’t be compromised in the afternoon,”
said Livvy gloomily.
Mr. Thompson did not entertain very much, but
Lois remembered once staying to supper there,
early that summer, with David and Gerald. That
was before times got so bad and the officers had to
be back early in barracks. Mr. Thompson’s dining-room
looked on to trees, that fanned little gusts
of light over the table then closed again in green
darkness; it smelt of meat and there was an enormous
pilastered mahogany sideboard like the front
of a temple, inside which they could hear mice
running about. Mr. Thompson was silent—from
fear, they thought, rather than disapproval—he
kept drawing long black horsehairs from the seat of
his chair and laying them out on the cloth. At
each hair, David and Gerald leaned forward and
opened their mouths to speak. But Mr. Thompson
went down in his collar so that they could not: they
spoke to each other. And Lois, looking under her
lids, had marvelled at this fortress of many opinions.
His sister Miss Thompson was present, but she was
deaf. The dining-room was dark red, with a
smoky ceiling, and Gerald said afterwards he had
felt like a disease in a liver. When the blancmange
came in it lay down with a sob and Miss Thompson
frowned at it. “Death of the cow,” thought Lois,
and saved this up. Livvy kept looking warningly
at her friends, but they were all polite. Some ducks
filed in at the French window; the guests flapped
with their napkins, but Mr. Thompson said: “Oh,
let them be,” and sure enough the ducks went
round the table with their usual urgent look and out
by the window again. Mr. Thompson got up and
shut out the May air. “Times change for the
worse,” he said to Gerald, who agreed with him so
emphatically that David had to repeat the interchange
to the anxious Miss Thompson. No wonder
Livvy found home dull.
But the happiness of the evening, the closeness-up
of the four to each other, the tremors they all
transmitted, the cramp of inside laughter, remained
with Lois, as though they had held hands tightly
under the large oppression. And—under that
pressure of laughter compact to bursting-point—a
particular stored excitement of pride and pleasure,
a jump of intimacy at each other’s voices and movements.
And the awareness stayed when, afterwards,
they had laughed themselves out and were
empty and solemn, tinging their interchanges with
unusual shyness. That supper marked a degree
in her appreciation of Gerald—his crystalline niceness.
For Mr. Thompson, still with a little blancmange
hanging off his moustache, got up and left
them. And later Miss Thompson stood pulling
down her skirt across her hips, when Gerald opened
the door so beautifully that she had to go out
through it, to perfect an experience. Then Livvy,
to show what she thought of her family, got up and
waltzed round the table, tugged open the window,
ran on to the lawn and with unabated gentility
jumped on all the croquet hoops, David following.
And Gerald turned for the first time to look
at Lois, who looked away. They poured out more
barley-water and, in an ecstasy of bad manners,
bubbled into their glasses. They went out and sat
on the seat by the croquet lawn, under a bush of
syringa. Waxy petals touched Lois’s arm stretched
out along the back of the seat, the air smelt of
almonds, moths came slanting out of the bush and
glittered off on the dusk.
Miss Thompson declared it had been a pleasure,
and had asked them to come again. Lois now said:
“I should tell your aunt, she has so little to interest
her; I am sure she would be wonderfully sympathetic.”
“I always find it difficult,” Livvy said, “to open
the subject of marriage.” And as she looked down,
looked significant, the word did flower over with
implications, so that it was, to Lois, at once in a pit
and upon a pinnacle that she leaned and frowned
and dangled her garnet ring.
“If only David were more determined!”
“But aren’t you certain he wants to marry you?”
“Yes, but he needs to have it all arranged for
him. Just because I’m such a capable girl....
Listen, Lois: if you were to be engaged to Gerald
Lesworth it would in a kind of way set the ball
rolling. Then I should say to my father—”
“Oh, but then I—”
“Of course he may not ask you. But that being
so, I should say to my father—”
“Ssh!”
Laurence was well into the drawing-room before
he recognized Livvy’s shoulder-blades and saw her
pink reflection nodding at him in a glass. He
flushed with annoyance and bowed. There was
ink on his forehead, between the eyebrows, where
he had rubbed with the tip of his pen. “How
d’you do,” he said and, to Lois: “Has Miss Norton
started? Started—set out—gone to village? Eh?”
“Oh ... yes.”
“Pity. Did she seem to be ... waiting about
at all?”
Livvy giggled. Lois said, oh no, she had not
seemed to be waiting about. Why?
“Curiosity. I could have gone for her; I have
nothing to do.”
“She hadn’t got anything to do either.”
“Naturally.” The two girls leaning shoulder to
shoulder on the piano filled Laurence with an unutterable
depression. He could not leave them.
He went to a table of books, took up a book on
Nigeria, looked intently into it and blew some dust
from between the pages. He felt the only living
thing had gone out of the house. He felt hungry,
though it was not yet half-past eleven. He could
not go upstairs and work, or in fact settle down to
anything. He felt as though he were the weather:
“Le temps, c’est moi!” He wished he were the
sort of man who would go out to the yard and take
the car to pieces. Marda was the only person who
found him amusing—but perhaps he was not
amusing, perhaps they were right. “Mrs. Montmorency
did not sleep either,” he said. “Notice
her eyes this morning?”
“Eh?” said Livvy.
“This is a dreadful house, Miss Thompson. I
should not stay to lunch if I were you. Besides,
it’s only mutton, I asked the cook. Lois, have you
any foolscap? I thought I might write a novel.”
“Oh, do! Oh, how lovely! But I have no foolscap;
ask Uncle Richard. He has some paper
over from when he was going to write his memoirs....
Laurence, are you going to stay in here?”
“Well, I’d rather not.” It occurred to him that
he might do worse than walk over to lunch with
the Careys. There would be a freshness in their
dullness and dampness after the dullness and dampness
here, while his own would have a charm for
them, a fertilizing strangeness. The households
had not seen anything of each other for three days.
Both families had driven over to Castle Trent to hear
about the raid, but had missed each other by half
an hour. There would be the raid to discuss, and
how the Trents were taking it; also, the Careys lived
well—at the worst there could be nothing worse
than mutton. “I am going to lunch at Mount
Isabel—any message to Nona?”
“Oh!” said Lois. Her eyes went dark with vivid
and deep disappointment at the thought of anybody
doing anything without her. She missed everything,
no one would ever care, she would never
marry. She blinked as Laurence went out and
shut the door.
“Funny thing,” said Livvy, “the way your cousin
blushes whenever he sees me.” She looked at
herself in the tall glass and settled her side hair.
“Now, Lois, what I always feel: a girl is only young
once—”
“I expect,” said Lois, “that that is all for the
best.”
XIV
“THOUGH to tell you the truth,” said
Lady Naylor, circulating among the
begonia beds at Mount Isabel, “though
I am in a way sorry, I am not altogether sorry that
she is going.”
She glanced closely at Mrs. Carey’s profile, to
see that her exact shade of meaning had been taken.
Mrs. Carey nodded and wrinkled up her forehead,
very profoundly. She was thinking about something
else. She stooped, pulled off three dead
begonias and crumpled them into her pocket.
“Because if that should be what she is going to do,
I should rather she did not do it with us. For
one thing, the Lawes are relations, they are cousins
to a cousin of mine by marriage. One does not
know what they might not say about influence.
Though no one could interfere less than I do, one
never knows, does one, what might go round
through the family? And really I am superstitious
about her visits, already this time she has lost
a suitcase. One cannot help feeling responsible.”
“But are you certain,” asked Mrs. Carey, looking
critically round this part of her garden as
though she were wishing to have it all up and
replant it again, “that she is going to break it off?”
“I shouldn’t like to say. She has got into a
kind of a nervous habit of sending telegrams.
Up and down, up and down all day to the village.
Surely that is abnormal in an engaged girl? It is
not even as if they were buying a house or anything.
It’s bound to be so unintimate—unless she does
not consider the post-mistress, and I do think really
she ought to because it is our post-mistress. And
another thing—I don’t really know that I ought to
speak of this, but I really cannot discuss it with
poor little Francie—I don’t think she has at all a
good effect on Hugo. You know what he’s like
usually? Well, he’s quite different. Quite empressé....
But I don’t expect there is anything
in that really. One so easily says too much.”
She paused, sighed and waited. Mrs. Carey
looked at her mildly. “Oh?” she said. “Oh yes.
But how do you mean?”
“I know Francie notices; I know she is unhappy.
Of course she always is unhappy, but she’s unhappy
now in a different way. Of course one hates to say
it, but one does know what Hugo is ...”
“Oh—is he really?” said Mrs. Carey, startled.
“What Hugo needs is real trouble. Now if
poor little Francie died—”
“Is she seriously—?”
“No, I feel that he will die first, he has just that
way of avoiding things. Look how he didn’t marry
Laura.... However, I expect I am being quite
ridiculous; I hate to exaggerate—it is from having
Laurence so much in the house. Have you noticed
how clever young men—? I believe he’s worse
in England; they think him amusing. Of course
there is no harm in Marda; one has known her
since she was little. She’s only wild—two of her
uncles were like that. Shall you ever forget how
her knee bled that afternoon? You know, I didn’t
give another children’s party for three years!”
Coming to the edge of the lawn, they looked
down on a court where Marda, Lois, Laurence and
Nona Carey were playing tennis. The two ladies,
at peace and with the faint self-congratulation with
which one generation watches another, gazed with
a statuesque remoteness over the foreground. “She
is, somehow, I don’t know ... charming,” said
Mrs. Carey, as Marda and Lois crossed and recrossed.
“Shall we go round before tea and look
at the dahlias? I wanted to ask you ...”
They turned, having cast an imposing shadow
over the consciousness of the players, and went
softly, heavily over the grass to the iron door of
the garden. It seemed natural to Mrs. Carey,
half dissolved in the brightness and depth of the
afternoon, that Hugo should be attracted towards
a fellow-visitor; such things came on and passed,
transitory as a summer. She did not see that there
was anything one need do; she said so to Lady
Naylor.
The fine weather was back again. Over the
roof of Mount Isabel a mountain sheathed in pink
air looked gentle and distant. Light slid over the
heavy burnished trees; the cream façade of the
house was like cardboard, high and confident in the
sun—a house without weight, an appearance less
actual than the begonias’ scarlet and wax-pink
flesh. Begonias, burning in an impatience of
colour, crowded over the edge of heart-shaped beds.
As the four came up from the court there was silence
over the sheen of grass. Then a maid leaned out
from the dark through the drawing-room window
sounding the brass tea-gong: a minor note.
Marda perhaps was wild, like her uncles, but
not inconsiderate. She had realized, almost upon
arrival, that the worst thing she could do would be
to attract Mr. Montmorency. To be loved by
him would be the culminating disaster of her unfortunate
visits. The idea seemed to her silly—she
could not think of herself as fatal—but rooted itself
during a fit of extreme apprehension induced by the
loss of her suitcase. She dreaded the suitcase
might not be the close of her record; having made
the acquaintance of Hugo she saw it would not be.
She might not be fatal, but here she was certainly
fated. She thought: “Damn him!” with conscious
injustice and drew on every resource, all that might
once have been called the arts of her sex to repel,
to annoy and to bore him. That day of the beech
walk, in old Dannie’s cottage, she had had in a
flash the measure of her unsuccess. Persistently
charmless, untiring in her attempts not to please,
she had still to retreat, resentful, upon a female
wariness, guardedness, circumspection she had
always despised. Her reward: at the foot of the stairs
at bedtime, a contact of finger-tips—all of himself
in the touch—as he gave her her candlestick: a
startled look over the flame. And as the four
candles went up with the ladies, drawing a tide of
shadow, she and Lois had turned at a turn of the
stairs to see him still there, looking up from the
staggering mounting dark. She took Lois’s arm.
That was the night he did not sleep, and Lois
did not sleep either.
To-day, Smith had ridden over to Mount Isabel
for tea and Nona. He stood smiling over the
glittering tray, in the high dark-yellow shadows,
pleased but anonymous. He was a man whose
name one could not remember. But his appearance
agitated Mrs. Carey, who recalled that he did
not eat any tea. She hoped it would all be all right.
She said to Marda distractedly: “I am glad you
are going to be happy: I hope you will be really,
really married.”
“Thank you so much,” said Marda. “I am sure
I shall be.”
“Of course,” continued Mrs. Carey, still watching
Smith, “I ought not to congratulate him, I
ought to congratulate you.”
“I am very fortunate.”
“Oh no, I don’t mean that at all. Show me your
lovely ring—oh, you haven’t got it on. But I
expect you have got a lovely ring. Mr. Smith, I
hope you will play tennis?”
But Smith, who did not feel like tennis, had not
brought shoes. Tennis was not his idea at all.
He had thought perhaps a little walk in the garden,
a few plums ... And Nona got up very pink and
conscious and circulated with plates of cake. She
knew that she must throw off people like Mr. Smith
because next summer she was to be presented and
have a season in London. Lady Naylor could
not help raising her eyebrows at Mrs. Carey.
“Such a pity,” remarked Mrs. Carey, as they slid
up arm-chairs to the tea-table, “you didn’t bring
over the Montmorencys. Wouldn’t they come?”
“He might have come,” said Laurence, “but as I
am not allowed to drive there was not room in the
car. There were too many of us.”
“Never mind,” said Marda. “I am going on
Saturday.”
“Oh no, you aren’t!” cried Lois, and added
respectfully: “Don’t be so silly.”
Lady Naylor sighed. “Unfortunately, Marda
must go back to England. I don’t know what we
shall do without her....”
“Do you like England?” said Nona Carey, moving
away from Smith. “Are you really going to
live there? I always think it’s so new-looking.
But of course there’s a great deal going on....
Where do you live, Mr. Smith?”
“Eastbourne.”
Though Lady Naylor said at once that that must
be very bracing, Smith wilted under a general
commiseration. He recrossed his legs, frowned
at the toe of his shoe and said he thought sometimes
of going to East Africa. A forlorn and
slighted feeling the announcement of Marda’s
departure cast over them was heightened by this
proposed defection of Smith’s. Lady Naylor remarked
disparagingly that that would be rather
lonely, while Mrs. Carey, seeing Smith at once
against hot African skies in a silhouette of nobility,
felt they had been unkind and asked him to come
over here on the sofa and tell her about himself. He
told her. Nona sat and twirled on the music stool.
“Smith,” said Laurence, “you ought to stay and
defend us.” And Smith had to promise he would
not leave the Army and go to East Africa till they
were all settled.
But to Laurence and Lois this all had already a
ring of the past. They both had a sense of detention,
of a prologue being played out too lengthily,
with unnecessary stress, a wasteful attention to
detail. Apart, but not quite unaware of each other,
queerly linked by antagonism, they both sat eating
tea with dissatisfaction, resentful at giving so much
of themselves to what was to be forgotten. The
day was featureless, a stock pattern day of late
summer, blandly insensitive to their imprints.
The yellow sun—slanting in under the blinds on
full-bosomed silver, hands balancing Worcester,
dogs poking up wistfully from under the cloth—seemed
old, used, filtering from the surplus of some
happy fulfilment; while, unapproachably elsewhere,
something went by without them.
Marda wanted more tea—but they were all distracted,
an argument raged round Smith. “You
must, of course, go on Saturday?” said Laurence,
taking her cup. “Oh yes—why?” She leaned
back from the bar of sun, into the shade of the
curtains. Shadow gave transparency to her colours;
its brown clarity hardened her face revealingly so
that she was exposed a moment, in her anxiety,
without the defence of manner. Her green linen
dress went ghostly against the cretonne’s rather
jarring florescence.
“Just when it’s fine,” said Laurence, banal with
sincerity.
“That is because I’m going.”
He listened a moment and, as the uproar of
argument was sustained, said quickly: “Lois and
I aren’t a good addition—the Montmorencys think
so. Is that what bored you? Nobody’s ever gone
so soon. There was a walk I wanted to take you.”
He rattled the cup and saucer at her in desperation.
“I think you make a mistake, going.”
“Oh, I expect so, but—”
“Look at Lois, her eyes are starting out of her
head. When you’ve gone, she’ll go up and cry on
your bed. It will fill her mornings.”
“Oh, shut up, she can hear you.”
“No,” said Laurence, “she can’t, though she’s
trying to. I’m not so sorry, but I do think it’s
unimaginative of you going. Why have you got
to see Mr. Lawe? I mean, quite dispassionately,
isn’t there heaps of time for him?... You see,”
concluded Laurence, “I am enraged—by all this—past
snubbing-point.”
“I want some more tea,” said Marda, “more
than anything in the world.”
Unable to attract the attention of their hostess,
Laurence leaned over the tray and took the teapot.
On his way back to Marda he guessed from the
unmoving intentness with which she was staring out
at the begonias—they gave back little vermilion
flecks to her eyes—that there was some one at the
bottom of this and that it was Mr. Montmorency.
He had learnt—from leaning out of his window
while his aunt talked to Mrs. Montmorency down
on the steps—that they all thought she contemplated
breaking off her engagement. Personally
he thought this improbable. Mr. Montmorency
himself was the supreme objection; but also she
would be getting herself a good home and what
went with it—money, assurance and scope. He
himself only wished he could do so as easily. He
now stood above her holding the cup of tea and
could have counted three before she turned round.
But then—oh, the waste of his comprehension—he
saw she was laughing.
She had laughed at a thought of the subdued
surprise with which they would come to her wedding;
barely dressed as befitted because of that
unshaken disbelief in her; buttoning, till well up
the aisle, their white gloves. But the origin of their
disbelief did not seem to her funny; had acquired
for her, in fact, a tragic vulgarity. So that she
did not explain the joke to Laurence; she thanked
him and drank the tea, which was all wrong.
Out, at last, through the window, dazzled, threading
and separating between the flower-beds, the
party dispersed with their cigarettes. Large to
themselves, to each other graduating from a little
below life-size to an eye from the mountain ant-like—but
smaller and less directed—or like beads
tipped out. A sense of exposure, of being offered
without resistance to some ironic un-curiosity,
made Laurence look up at the mountain over the
roof of the house. In some gaze—of a man’s up
there hiding, watching among the clefts and ridges—they
seemed held, included and to have their only
being. The sense of a watcher, reserve of energy
and intention, abashed Laurence, who turned from
the mountain. But the unavoidable and containing
stare impinged to the point of a transformation
upon the social figures with their orderly, knitted
shadows, the well-groomed grass and the beds,
worked out in this pattern.
Driving home, tightly packed hip to hip in the
back of the car between Marda and Lois, and
bumping conjointly over the inequalities of the
road, Lady Naylor told them of a discovery she had
made. Mrs. Carey, also, did not understand
modern young people. They seemed, Mrs. Carey
had said, to have no idealism, no sense of adventure,
they thought so much of their comfort—
Possibly Mrs. Carey was wrong? But almost she
thought she agreed with her. In their youth,
Mrs. Carey and she would have been deeply excited
by all that was happening round them. Lady
Naylor thought all young people ought to be rebels;
she herself had certainly been a rebel. But since
the War, they had never ceased mouching. She
herself had had a deep sense of poetry; she remembered
going to sleep with Shelley under her pillow.
She used to walk alone in the mountains and hated
coming in to meals. Mrs. Carey had noticed that
Nona would not miss a meal for anything—she
was unpunctual always, but never absent. But
perhaps Mrs. Carey misjudged the girl? Mrs.
Carey and she had passed through periods of profound
unhappiness. And yet their youth was a
golden period; they would not have missed it. It
did seem a pity, they both had agreed, to be born
middle-aged.
These last remarks were directed with a degree
of resentment at Laurence’s back view, in the
front of the car by the chauffeur. His ears, of
unfortunate conformation, curled out semi-transparent
against the evening light. Laurence said
nothing, but thought; he must write that novel,
for here lay a gold-mine (then Spain and those
first editions, a Picasso and curtains for his rooms).
He would vindicate modern young people for his
aunt and her generation. Only he did not know if
he should write about cocktail parties or whimsical
undergraduates.
XV
HUGO was dumb, his companion inattentive
to him in silence. They walked on the
turf of the Darra valley, along the edge of
the water: he beat with his stick at the gold, strident
ragwort. At every flash of the stick she glanced
in surprise, but did not say: “Spare them.” Lois,
straggling behind, threw in twig after twig to the
swollen, hurrying Darra; ran a short way with each
in intense excitement, lost it and threw in another.
She seemed absorbed but remotely dependent, like
one of the dogs. If she had fallen in with a loud
enough splash and a cry she might have distracted
the couple ahead, but she was surefooted and
not quite certain enough of herself to fall in on
purpose.
Recollections of Laura were now wiped for him
from the startlingly green valley, leaving the scene
dull. Not a turn of the rocks with the river, not
a break-down of turf along the brink, not the
Norman keep with perishing corners (where they
leaned and quarrelled till Laura had wished aloud
it would fall on them) gave back to him what they
had taken of that eroding companionship. He
and she might never have come here; they were
disowned. The sharp rocks breaking out from the
turf, the impassive speed of the water were naked
and had to be seen as themselves, in some relation
excluding him; like country seen from the train,
without past or future. And, having given proof
of her impotence to be even here, Laura shrank
and drew in her nimbus, leaving only—as in some
rediscovered diary of a forgotten year—a few
cryptic records, walks, some appointments kept,
letters received and posted.
He now guessed, in fact, he had never loved
her. Shocked but with an enlivening sense of
detachment, he turned to Marda—but still had
nothing to say. She walked rather too quickly
beside him, with long steps. She was leaving
to-morrow; she was to be in England indefinitely:
she seemed content. And for this, his anger
released from Laura, settled upon her. He loved
her: a sense of himself rushed up, filling the valley.
The rocks again were transmuted: broken all over
in planes of light, a defeated sharpness, they were
no more limestone.
“Mrs. Montmorency knows Leslie’s aunt,” said
Marda suddenly. “Do you? It seems so extraordinary?”
“If I ever did I’ve forgotten her.”
“She’s so nice.”
“I have no doubt.”
“Let’s ask Lois to come and talk to us.”
“She seems quite happy. Where do you go—after
to-morrow?”
“Oh, Kent. Doesn’t it seem extraordinary?”
Having given the matter rather too marked attention,
he pronounced that her sense of the extraordinary
seemed to him extravagant. She agreed
there did seem to be some disparity in their outlook.
“Disparity!” he cried out. “Everything!
What a good thing we shall never need to understand
each other.”
“I never try to understand anybody,” she said
mildly.
“No, indeed,” he replied with sarcasm. “Who
is worth it?”
At this she looked back again for Lois. She
remembered Francie, seeing them off from the
steps in a pink blouse, and the look that fluttered
after them down the avenue. No wonder Francie
looked like a windflower—her husband had this
unfortunate ability to be young at any time. His
unordered moods gave him the churlishness of a
schoolboy; his silliness embarrassed her. Yet
anger did illuminate him becomingly: brighter
and harder, for the first time he could be conceived
as lovable. Though in this personal atmosphere
generated by his temper she was feeling least herself,
most nearly negative.
“I should like to go over there,” she said, looking
across the water to where trees began on a
skyline and went down steeply, powdered yellow
with light on their tops.
“We can’t,” he said, triumphant, “the stepping-stones
are covered.” He showed her a line of
faint scars, a hesitation across the current.
“I never thought of there being stepping-stones.
I only wanted to cross because we couldn’t. Why
does one always seem to be on the wrong side?”
“I should have thought you never were—don’t
you even make rather a point of that?”
She was exasperated past caution. “Mr. Montmorency,
what is the matter?”
Seeing that he had overreached himself, been
absurd, he raised his eyebrows in courteous mystification—“Matter?”—did
not reply but began
talking about his travels—the greenest river he
knew was the Ain, he said; had she ever looked
down on the Ain?—an appointment he had held
in the North (a deterrent from travel), his five years
in London (release from the North), a business
enterprise with which he had once been connected.
It had never been sound, he now saw, he said, but
had once had a chance of success. She took him
as he had intended, as the practical man manqué.
They discussed the question of Canada, whether
he would have succeeded. She thought, emphatically,
it was a pity he had not tried. “But my
wife’s health—” “Oh yes, Mrs. Montmorency ...”
“The fact is, I have not made her happy.”
“She would always be happy a little; she is
wonderfully unselfish.”
“Do you mean—”
“Oh, what is that? The ghost of a Palace
Hotel?”
The mill startled them all, staring, light-eyed,
ghoulishly, round a bend of the valley. Lois had
to come hurrying up to explain how it frightened
her. In fact, she wouldn’t for worlds go into it
but liked going as near as she dared. It was a fear
she didn’t want to get over, a kind of deliciousness.
These dead mills—the country was full of them,
never quite stripped and whitened to skeletons’
decency: like corpses at their most horrible.
“Another,” Hugo declared, “of our national grievances.
English law strangled the—” But Lois
insisted on hurrying: she and Marda were now well
ahead.
The river darkened and thundered towards the
mill-race, light came full on the high façade of
decay. Incredible in its loneliness, roofless, floorless,
beams criss-crossing dank interior daylight,
the whole place tottered, fit to crash at a breath.
Hinges rustily bled where a door had been wrenched
away; up six stories panes still tattered the daylight.
Mounting the tree-crowded, steep slope some
roofless cottages nestled under the flank of the
mill with sinister pathos. A track going up the
hill from the gateless gateway perished among the
trees from disuse. Banal enough in life to have
closed this valley to the imagination, the dead mill
now entered the democracy of ghostliness, equalled
broken palaces in futility and sadness; was transfigured
by some response of the spirit, showing
not the decline of its meanness, simply decline;
took on all of the past to which it had given nothing.
Rooks disturbed the trees, disturbed the echoes.
“Don’t go in!” cried Lois and clutched Marda’s
arm convulsively.
“Come on,” said Marda, “I feel demoralized,
girlish. Let’s hide from Mr. Montmorency.”
Lois shied through the gateway with more than
affected nervousness. This was her nightmare:
brittle, staring ruins. Mr. Montmorency, disgruntled,
still dawdled by the river; the idea of
escape appeared irresistible. But the scene was
strangely set for a Watteau interlude. Inside the
mill door, a high surge of nettles; one beam had
rotted and come down, there was some debris of the
roof.
“If he starts shouting,” Lois said, apprehensive,
“he’ll certainly bring the mill down. Oh, I can’t
come in, oh, I can’t possibly. Oh, it’s beastly
here; I feel sick. I think you are quite mad!”
“I think you’re a shocking little coward.”
“I’m not afraid of anything reasonable. But
I’m simply nervous, one can’t help that.”
“Come in through that door.”
“But it’s so high.”
Marda put an arm round her waist, and in an
ecstasy at this compulsion Lois entered the mill.
Fear heightened her gratification; she welcomed its
inrush, letting her look climb the scabby and livid
walls to the frightful stare of the sky. Cracks ran
down; she expected, now with detachment, to see
them widen, to see the walls peel back from a cleft—like
the House of Usher’s.
“Hate it?” said Marda.
“You’d make me do anything.”
The sun cast in through the window sockets some
wild gold squares twisted by the beams; grasses
along the windows trembled in light. Marda
turned and went picking her way through the
nettles; there was a further door, into darkness—somewhere,
a roof still held. “Marda, help:
here’s a dead crow!” “Tchch!”
“But it’s very dead!” Shuddering exaggeratedly,
leaping in a scared way over the nettles,
Lois also made for the dark doorway, eager for
comment, contempt, consolation. She was a little
idiot—appealing, she felt quite certain, to a particular
tenderness.
In the dark of a lean-to, Marda was moving
dimly. “Stairs!” she exclaimed with interest.
Then she was back in a flash and stood in the door,
barring it. She stood intently; menace contracted
about her attitude.
“What?” whispered Lois.
“Ssh—some one’s asleep here.”
“Perhaps they’re dead?” She stared past Marda’s
shoulder into the darkness, and, desirous,
laughed, then clapped the back of a hand to her
mouth—unnatural gesture, adequate to the drama.
Gradually, she was able to see a man lying face down,
arms spread out; a coat rolled into a pillow under
his face which twisted sideways a little to let him
breathe. One fist, clenched loosely, strayed to a
clump of nettles; the knuckles must have been stung
quite white. He could not feel the nettles—one
had to imagine sleep like that! Behind him, stairs
went up into visibility, to a gash of daylight.
Ashamed, the two young women stood elbow to
elbow. Marda stepped back, some plaster crackled
under her heel.
“What’s that?” said the man softly.
“Come away quickly—come—”
But the man rolled over and sat up, still in the calm
of sleep. “Stay there,” he said, almost persuasively:
a pistol bore the persuasion out. They were embarrassed
by this curious confrontation. Neither of
them had seen a pistol at this angle; it was short-looking,
scarcely more than a button. The man
sat looking at them with calculating intentness,
like a monkey, then got up slowly: the pistol
maintained its direction.
“Don’t be silly,” said Marda. “Go to sleep
again. We’re not—”
“Are there any more of yez?”
“One—not interested either. Better let us go
now, there will be less talk.”
“We’re just out for a walk,” said Lois, surprised
at her own voice.
“Indeed,” said the man. “It is a grand evening
for a walk no doubt. Is it from Castle Trent
y’are?”
“Danielstown.”
The man’s eyes went from one to the other, and
remained ironically between them. His face was
metal-blue in the dusk and seemed numbed into
immobility. “It is time,” he said, “that yourselves
gave up walking. If you have nothing better to do,
you had better keep in the house while y’have it.”
Marda, a hand on the frame of the doorway,
remained unmoved, but Lois could not but agree
with him. She felt quite ruled out, there was
nothing at all for her here. She had better be
going—but where? She thought: “I must marry
Gerald.” But meanwhile Marda, holding her arm
all the time, had softly, satirically pressed it. They
could not but feel framed, rather conscious, as
though confronting a camera. The man, who did
not cease to regard them with uneasy dislike, asked
which way they had come, whom they had met, if
they had observed any movement of soldiers about
the country. He remained dissatisfied; evidently
they had the appearance of liars.
Meanwhile Mr. Montmorency, suspicious of
merriment somewhere and determined to humour
no one, had sat down to smoke on a parapet. At
its base the bank descended; the river rushed
loudly, dark with its own urgency, under his
dangling feet. The mill behind affected him like
a sense of the future; an unpleasant sensation of
being tottered over. Split light, like hands, was
dragged past to the mill-race, clawed at the brink
and went down in destruction. He looked at the
opposite hill, its distinct and peaceful trees. Marda
belonged there and might be imagined composedly
walking. Knocking some ash off, he leaned forward
and groaned at the intervening water—“On the
wrong side”— He missed Francie; there welled
up in him one great complaint to Francie. She—selfless
woman—would non-committally rustle;
some tender fidgeting always relieved her intentness
of listening. Distressed for her husband, she would
let out little sighs. He would tell her everything....
Yet he could not, for Marda was everywhere
present, a clear ruddy-white mask of surprise.
She impinged on the whole of him, on his most
intimate sense of himself, with her cool sombre
amusement. Had she a ghost everywhere?—there
was something of her in Francie.
“It is like this,” he began to rehearse, “what I
need is—”
A shot, making rings in the silence. Eardrums
throbbing, he gathered up the reverberations
with incredulity. A battle—a death in the mill?
Whose death? He leapt to one thought, a flash of
relief in the panic. The front of the mill—he ran
round to it—grinned with vacancy: corpse of an
idiot. He steadied himself in the door, watched
his cigarette drop into the nettles, then stumbled
in over the debris. A crow’s flight, stooping wildly
among the rafters, dislodged a trickle of plaster.
He paused in the well of ruin, terrified for them all.
But the crow swerved out through the roof.
“Marda!”
“All right,” said Lois. They appeared in a
doorway and looked at him gravely, rather suspiciously.
Marda put up a hand to her mouth—in
an incredible half-glimpse, he thought he saw
blood round the lips.
Something released in his voice, he said: “Marda—for
God’s sake—”
Lois, as though the mill were falling, went white,
then crimson. He had, distantly, some apprehension
of an emotional shock. Marda, perplexedly,
continued sucking her hand. Then she took Lois’s
handkerchief, dabbed at her knuckles, wiped the
blood from her lips—where no more came—returned
to her knuckles. “I have lost some skin,”
she said at last resentfully. “Just, a pistol went
off—you heard?—by accident. I seem to have lost
some pieces of skin.”
“Let me go past,” he said violently.
“We swore—” began Lois.
“Some one went upstairs backward, not very
sensibly, not having eaten much for four days.
There was some plaster—the pistol went off,
naturally. It was silly, really. Look at my beastly
hand—I was holding on to the door.”
“Let me get past—”
“But we swore, Mr. Montmorency—”
“You deserve to be shot!” He turned in a
manner terrifying to all of them—most of all to
himself—on this interruption. “You don’t seem
to see, you seem to have no conception—”
“Then why sit there and smoke?” said Lois,
trembling. “I saw you—you and your old conceptions.”
“Shut up,” said Marda, “oh, do shut up!”
“Don’t stand there, let me go past; I’ll—”
“Oh, do let’s talk about something else—”
“We swore,” went on Lois priggishly. “There
never was anybody, we never saw anybody, you
never heard—”
But nobody listened. Vaguely, he waved her
silent.
“The fact is,” said Marda, “we are neither of us
good at explosions. Perhaps if we sat down and
thought it over? Perhaps if you went for a walk—not
up in the trees?”
“No more hide-and-go-seek,” he said, playful with
fury. “Still bleeding—?”
“Not like I can—I have rather a high standard.
Do you remember the scraper? No, I might have
done—this—on the broken edge of a slate: it will
be the edge of a slate if you don’t mind. And,
being me, it was bound to happen.”
He was set on transgressing the decencies.
“Don’t you realize you might have been—”
Marda laughed, coming out through the door
of the mill beside him. He looked at her lips—no
higher—angrily—burningly. Lois looked
quickly away. She thought how the very suggestion
of death brought this awful unprivacy.
They took his place on the parapet. Warily,
they watched him walk back the way they had come,
with effort, as though breasting a current. Lois
took up his forgotten matchbox, shook it and put
it away in her pocket. Their sex was a stronghold,
they had to acknowledge silently; traditionally,
one could always retreat on collapse. Mr.
Montmorency having taken away with him any
element of agitation, they were left with a particular
sort of shyness.
“How one talks!” said Marda.
Lois tied up the hand, she said it seemed like
Providence that her handkerchief should be clean
to-day. Marda’s was coloured, that would never
have done. One had always heard that dye ran into
the blood.
“I don’t think it would,” said Marda. “It
boils, it is really a good handkerchief.... This
is the worst of big hands.”
“I suppose they are rather big.”
“Sorry we went in?”
“No.”
“You are being nice to me.... One won’t be
girlish again—I think, as a matter of fact, we were
being goatish.”
“But I’ve had a ... a revelation,” said Lois.
She bent forward over the river, felt streaks of light
fly over her face and felt that speech did not matter
when so much was being carried past. “About
Mr. Montmorency ... he’s being awful about
you, isn’t he?”
The statement, almost a query, fluttered up at
the end. But Marda’s face was inscrutable with
reflections.
“About you. I had no idea—I was too damned
innocent,” she explained with precision—“till we
all stood in there and shouted.—Hear him tell me
I ought to be shot?”
“He was all—dishevelled. He had to be
adequate.”
“Oh, I didn’t mind. But, I mean, aren’t you
rather—embarrassed?”
“One can’t help things.”
“I was awful, I said, ‘You and your old conceptions.’
They are rather old, aren’t they?... I
mean, really: he was in love with my mother.”
“Well, I’m going away, aren’t I?”
“But, I mean, what is the good of this? It doesn’t
make anything.”
Marda said, inconsequent: “I hope I shall have
some children; I should hate to be barren.”
“Once I really meant to love him, but it would
never have done.”
Marda leant against Lois’s shoulder. “You are
wonderful!”
“Not so protected as you imagine.”
“Nothing gets past your imagination.”
“I wish,” said Lois thoughtfully, “I had really
been shot. But I couldn’t be.” Later she added:
“I’m sorry I said that about Mr. Montmorency.
What will become of him?”
“Nothing.”
“I’m glad he wasn’t my father.”
“He couldn’t be anything’s father.”
“Where shall you be this time to-morrow?”
“In the train.”
“Funny,” said Lois. “Queer.” Her heart
thumped, she looked at her watch. “Half-past
six,” she said. “It’s harder, for some reason, to
imagine what I’ll be doing or where I shall be.”
“A nice walk with Laurence, a nice cheerful
squabble. If you want something to talk about,
talk about me.”
“No, no, I mean ... No.” She looked up
from the water. “You know,” she said, “all this
has quite stopped any excitement for me about the
mill. It’s a loss, really. I don’t think I’ll come
down this part of the river again.... Will you
have to tell Leslie? I don’t think you ought to:
a swear is a swear, isn’t it, even in England.”
Nothing would have induced Marda to confirm
Leslie’s opinion that her country was dangerous as
well as demoralizing. He hated to think of even
his aunts at that side of the Channel. She expected,
some forty-eight hours ahead, to be walking with
him in a clipped and traditional garden, in Kentish
light. Under these influences, she would be giving
account of herself. Leslie’s attention, his straight
grey gaze, were to modify these wandering weeks
of her own incalculably, not a value could fail to be
affected by him. So much of herself that was fluid
must, too, be moulded by his idea of her. Essentials
were fixed and localized by their being together—to
become as the bricks and wall-paper of a
home.
At present, the mill was behind her, tattered and
irrelevantly startling, like a dream of two nights ago.
And Lois kept turning upon her a tragic and obstinate
gaze: she could sense a persistence of Leslie upon
the mental scene. Lois said, but defeatedly: “He
is certain to be suspicious.”
“I certainly won’t tell.”
“So it will be a secret?”
“A perfect secret.”
“Thank you so much,” said Lois. As though
breaking a spell, she shifted away down the parapet,
put her feet to the ground, and was surprised to
feel her legs trembling under her. “Here,” she
said generously, “comes Mr. Montmorency.”
He came: “with demurest of footfalls.” They
smiled and shouted along the bank. Yes, they
could come now; yes, they were feeling splendid.
“Shan’t we be late for dinner?”
“That is impossible,” shouted Mr. Montmorency,
who was coming back to them looking
formal and pleasant.
XVI
MARDA was not due to leave until after
lunch, but throughout that morning
they were all distressed and sympathetic,
could not settle down to anything, walked about
the house. Every time Lady Naylor saw Marda
she asked her if she ought not to be packing, and
while Marda packed, with her door open, Lady
Naylor kept looking in to remark how sad it was
to see her thus engaged. Francie sat and sewed
in the ante-room, looking anxiously up whenever
anyone passed. The rain fell, the windows were
open, the rooms smelt of window-sills. Francie
rolled up her work with a sigh and went up to
tell Marda how sorry she was about the rain.
“You’ll have a wet drive,” she said.
“But the hood works,” said Marda, folding
together the sleeves of a scarlet dress.
“But rain is so sad when one’s going away.
Nothing, I mean but a train to arrive at.”
“But I really like trains: I am always talked to.”
“Hugo will be so sorry, he has so much enjoyed
talking to you.”
“It’s been very nice of him.”
Sir Richard looked up Marda’s train in a May
time-table and was worried because he could not
find it. Had she really any proof, he came up to
inquire, that it had been put on since? Would she
not be wiser to catch the 12.30 and have plenty of
time for dinner in Dublin? Also, what was he to do
about her suitcase if it ever turned up? But he
almost feared now it would never turn up. He
sighed and went back to the library.
Laurence sat in his room with a book with the
door open; he could see across the landing into
Marda’s room. Evidently she could not make
up her mind which hat to travel in: she tried on three
and looked at herself in each. He did not care for
her looks or her clothes, really; both were over-assured.
But then he could not recall whose looks
or whose clothes he did care for. Finally, he went
across to say he did not want South Wind back, she
could keep it to leave in the train, or simply pack it.
“Oh, thank you,” she said; “do write my name
in it.”
He recoiled at this awful suggestion.
Her room had all come to pieces—dresses swirled
on the bed, hats perched everywhere; she had lost
the wedge from the mirror so that it wagged right
forward, showing its blank side. She was taking
more from the house than herself and her luggage.
“You will have a wet drive.”
“The hood works,” said Marda mechanically,
throwing some rolled-up stockings out to make
room for some shoes.
“Hasn’t Lois been up?”
“I don’t think so.”
“What can she be doing?”
“Last time I saw her she was bouncing a tennis
ball on the dining-room wall between the portraits.
She says she has not much to do at present.”
“Anything I can—”
“Oh, if you’d write my labels—”
“I will indeed, but I hate block printing—need
they—?”
“Well, I’m afraid I would rather—”
“Remarkable orange labels,” said Laurence,
taking the packet from her politely.
“Here is Livvy Thompson,” he added, looking
out of the window. “She must have ridden over to
say good-bye.”
“But I don’t know her.”
“She doesn’t know that: you have met.”
Marda leaned out and called her good-byes to
Livvy, who waved and shouted up to her that she
would have a very wet drive. Marda withdrew,
shutting the window abruptly.
“I am sorry,” said Laurence, “that our young
men will not have a chance to say good-bye to you.”
“I’ve only met one of them—Gerald.”
“Oh yes, you weren’t here for our last party.
What a very short time you have been here....
I hope you’ll come back again soon—with your
husband?”
“Thank you, it’s very kind of you.”
Laurence bowed and went away with the labels.
When Lois heard Livvy’s voice on the steps she
fled to the back of the house and hid in a box-room.
Sir Richard had to tell Livvy he did not
know where she was; last time he had seen her she
had been sorting out some packs of old playing-cards
in the drawing-room and seemed very busy.
Livvy was much disappointed; however, she took
her horse round, then sat in the hall to wait.
Lady Naylor—who had spared her attention to
Marda with difficulty: this was a busy morning—was
agitated by this development. She stood at
the foot of the stairs, calling Lois.
“She doesn’t seem to be anywhere,” Francie at
last called helpfully, from the ante-room.
“But Livvy Thompson is sitting in the hall.”
“Ask Hugo to find her.”
“I can’t find him either.”
“Perhaps they have both gone out to the garden?”
“Not in all this rain.”
Lady Naylor sighed, gathered up two of the
kitchen kittens that were trespassing on the stairs
and plunged away through a swing door. It was
twenty to twelve: extraordinary how one’s mornings
went! Lunch was to be unnaturally early because
of Marda’s departure: evidently, Livvy would,
remain for it. She looked reproachfully into the
library. But there Sir Richard was engaged with
the herd, discussing the Darramore pig fair.
Meanwhile Lois was very melancholy in the box-room.
The window was dark with ivy, she could
not see out. The room was too damp for the
storage of trunks that were not finished with anyhow;
mustiness came from her mother’s old vaulted
trunks and from a stack of crushed cardboard
boxes. On the whitewash, her mother, to whom
also the box-room had been familiar, had written
L. N.; L. N., and left an insulting drawing of
somebody, probably Hugo. She had scrawled with
passion; she had never been able to draw. Lois
looked, and strained after feeling, but felt nothing.
Her problem was, not only how to get out unseen,
but why, to what purpose?
She did not really know Marda well; to go up
and offer to help her pack would surely appear
unnatural? Or worse, one might seem to be
taking advantage of yesterday? One had been
passingly intimate under the pistol’s little acute,
pig eye—but one had not spoken again of it. If
she were free, she could search the rooms for something
that looked plausibly Marda’s—a magazine,
a handkerchief—and bring it up. But then Livvy
was unavoidable, varnished up to the height of a
shine with love and bursting open with confidences
like a cotton-pod. She was appalled by these
thoughts of Livvy.
But Livvy was privileged. If she chose to
announce her engagement even Sir Richard must
stop and listen. It was a passport at any frontier,
that kind of announcement. Spurred by an impulse
she did not examine, Lois picked up two cardboard
lids and with infinite breathlessness crept from the
box-room. Through the back-stairs banisters she
peered and listened. Lady Naylor had given up
calling, but could still be heard complaining to
some one in the basement that she did not know
where Lois was.
Marda had finished packing, but felt it would
not be decent to reappear so soon. Especially
when weather did not permit of the “last walk,”
a formal parade of the grounds with her host and
hostess before lunch-time. She was pleased to see
Lois appear in the doorway.
“I brought up some cardboard in case you were
packing photographs.”
“But I haven’t got any photographs.”
“And you’re packed ... Would you like me to
sit on anything?”
“No, I think they will all shut.”
“What about Leslie?”
“Oh, he is in talc—unbreakable.”
“I say, I have never seen your engagement
ring.”
“Oh yes, we must see the ring,” called Laurence,
from over the landing. Surprised by a sudden
stillness inside the whirlwind, he had been settling
down to a half-morning’s work. But he came
across and breathed on the ring with Lois, in an
imitation of reverence, then returned to his work,
shutting the door loudly. Lady Naylor was heard
on the stairs again, talking to some one below as
she came up. Lois uttered an exclamation of despair
and dashed behind a window curtain. Lady
Naylor came in with some cake in a cardboard box.
She said she did not believe the train had a tea-car,
but that Marda should be able to get a tea-basket
at Ballybrophy. “But I am sure you won’t care
for tea-basket cakes, we none of us do.”
“Thank you so much—”
“My dear,” said her hostess, “it is really a terrible
pity about your hand. Especially as it’s the
left hand, as I’m afraid you will have to be conventional
and start wearing your ring again, now
you are going to England. It is extraordinary,
Marda, the way things happen to you.”
“We must be thankful,” said Marda, “that
nothing worse has happened this time.” Both
thinking of Hugo, they looked at each other benevolently,
brightly and blankly. “At least she has
not thought of that,” they both thought.
Lady Naylor looked with surprise at Lois’s feet.
“If you are hiding there,” she said, “it is simply
silly. I have been calling you everywhere. Livvy
is waiting for you down in the hall.”
“But I don’t want to see her.”
“But she is waiting for you in the hall.”
“I’ve got nothing to say and I’m sick of always
having to keep on saying it.”
“I can’t help that, she is your friend. And
I thought her feelings seemed very much hurt.”
“She will stay to lunch, you know,” Lois retorted.
“How fickle girls are!” said Lady Naylor, sitting
down on the window-sill. Her manner of sitting
and waiting most strongly encouraged an exit.
Lady Naylor was more than busy, but could not
resist this last opportunity to discover, before the
veil of an international marriage descended, what
Marda really thought of the English. For nothing
of Leslie was Irish except his aunts.
“Of course really,” she said, “you are very
adaptable. I dare say we all are, but with some of
us it does not have to come into play. I dare say
you’ll be very happy indeed. Where did you think
of living?”
Leslie had thought of London, Marda confessed
an omission on her part.
“Of course that is hardly England,” said Lady
Naylor, encouraging. “And of course it will be
lovely for you being able to go abroad so easily;
you will be so much nearer everything. And
you will have no neighbours, one never has, I
believe.”
“Demoralizing ...”
“You could certainly never be happy living like
Anna Partridge. She has an unnaturally sweet
disposition: I often pity her.... I always find
the great thing in England is to have plenty to say,
and mercifully they are determined to find one
amusing. But if one stops talking, they tell one
the most extraordinary things, about their husbands,
their money affairs, their insides. They
don’t seem discouraged by not being asked. And
they seem so intimate with each other; I suppose
it comes from living so close together. Of course
they are very definite and practical, but it is a pity
they talk so much about what they are doing. I
can’t think why they think it should matter: supposing
I came up here and insisted on telling you
what I had been doing the whole morning!”
Marda, feeling how true this must be, pulled
open an empty drawer and looked into it, much
depressed.
“Though I don’t think it is fair,” pursued Lady
Naylor, “to say they have no sense of humour, and
of course they are anxious not to appear conventional,
and they are kindness itself once they have
‘placed’ one.... Marda, surely you are not
going to travel in that thin coat? Well, for heaven’s
sake do not develop a cold till it can be obvious
that you haven’t caught it here. How very unfortunate
you have been in your weather! Just that
one fine day at Castle Isabel and yesterday evening
when you went for your walk. Before you came
it was brilliant—such a pity you missed our last
party—and as I was saying— Why, Hugo ...”
He did not seem pleased to be with them. He
was nonplussed at finding the door open, having
prepared to tap on it inexpressively. Francie had
insisted on sending him up with some eau-de-Cologne.
She expected that Marda, being so
modern, would not care for eau-de-Cologne, but
wanted to give her some little token for the journey:
this was all she could think of. To the idea of
this present he offered surprising resistance. Or
could she not take up her present herself? Her
large eyes of protest reminded him—their plan of
life must eliminate stairs for her; already, she had
been up to the top once. So here he was, prepared
to recede three steps when Marda should come to
her door: he was of that school.
He stood back from the door, looking past with
surprise at the room’s non-committal features—the
chairs, the window—as though he were specially
struck by there being a room at all in this part of
the house, and especially this room. Some tree-tops
fidgeted under his scrutiny. Where had he
been all the morning, his hostess wanted to know;
no one could find him. Indeed? They could not
have looked far: for he had been in the dining-room,
down at the dark end, taking out those old
Illustrated London News, old bound volumes he
remembered since he was a boy. There was that
Tsar being bombed by Nihilists: very interesting.
“I can’t think how any of those Tsars had any
confidence,” said Lady Naylor gloomily.
He looked doubtfully at the bottle of eau-de-Cologne;
Lady Naylor asked at once what he
had there, was told, and exclaimed at Francie’s
imagination.
“There is nothing like eau-de-Cologne at the
end of a crossing, when one is trying to look like
something again. Of course, it may not be so
bad to-night: at present I don’t like the look of
those trees. Our inland weather does sometimes
go by contraries; it may be surprisingly calm when
one gets to Kingstown. I often wonder if living
on an island does not make one more deeply religious—the
French, for instance, could never have our
sense of dependence—though of course they have
railway accidents. But I shouldn’t think of it,
Marda, that’s much the best way. I am sure one
is often sea-sick from nervousness.”
“I don’t know what Miss Norton’s friends will
think of her hand,” said Hugo. “Their worst
suspicions will be confirmed; they will think we have
been shooting at her. Her stumble was most
unfortunate.”
“I ought to have brought back that piece of
slate from the mill.”
“I hold you responsible, Hugo; you should not
have let her go climbing about. Never mind,
it will give them something to talk about.”
“You must draw on your imagination,” said
Hugo to Marda. “Don’t let them suspect how
tame we all are. They will expect you to be a bit
of a heroine; you must tell them everything that
might have happened.”
Marda, finding a place for the bottle of eau-de-Cologne
at the top of her dressing-case, declared:
“That would be inexhaustible.”
“They may think it odd that you should have
cut the back of your hand....”
The three closed suitcases had a look of finality.
Marda wished to go down and find Francie and
thank her, they all three crossed the landing at a
high pitch of affability. Laurence gripped the
hair over his temples in larger handfuls and crouched
lower down over his book. His thoughts, tight
with concentration, were darkened by a wave of
malignance. Marda’s door, which no one had shut,
remained flapping and clicking.
In the yard, under the dripping chestnuts, Lois
and Livvy walked about in their mackintoshes.
This afternoon, Lois intended to wash the dogs;
they might anticipate the occasion by disappearance,
so she thought it better to go down now—they
had had their dinners—and shut them up in the
stables. They had gone up and looked for no
reason into the loft, at the chaff and the dead swallows.
They went back slowly, listening in vain for
the gong.
“It seems odd,” said Livvy, “she should be going
away; she seems to have only just come. I generally
get so accustomed to your visitors. I have said
good-bye to her once—I had no idea I should be
staying to luncheon. However, I don’t suppose
she will remember, she seemed rather flurried.
Laurence was up there with her; it seems odd to me
to have a man in one’s bedroom even in the morning,
but I dare say she is rather cosmopolitan.... It
does seem a pity, Lois, you forgot to ask her about
that jumper pattern.”
“Do you remember those Black and Tans on the
Clonmore road? They always remind me of her.”
“Why?” said Livvy. Then with her holy look,
which Lois had up to now managed to keep in
abeyance, she added: “That was a memorable day
for me, naturally.”
“Why?” said Lois crossly.
“David and I decided to go to Cork.”
“I thought you said that was just chance.”
“It was predestination. Now I must tell you,
Lois—”
“Things that have come just before people seem
like part of them.”
“How you do talk ...”
“No, I don’t.”
“Lois,” said Livvy sagaciously, “I hope things
are not going wrong between you and Gerald?”
Since her engagement, she spoke of all young men
by their Christian names and made motherly little
impulsive advances in all directions, like Mrs.
Vermont.
Hugo wished to return to the Illustrated London
News, but the parlourmaid was laying the table
and looked at him in surprise. In the hall the two
young girls, hair damp from their excursion, were
playing left-hand catch with a tennis ball. So he
had to go into the library where his wife and Marda
were still talking about eau-de-Cologne—Marda
against the mantelpiece, bright and hard-looking
in her coat and skirt. Eau-de-Cologne wasn’t
scent, Francie summed up; she hated scent for it
seemed a kind of advertisement. Sir Richard
joined them; they all four talked in an eager,
unnatural way, as though they had just met for the
first time.
Indeed, the unfamiliarity of the moment made
them strange to themselves, though it now seemed
to have been waiting ahead of them like a trap
into which they had stepped with a degree of
naturalness. Sir Richard, the least affected, thought
the Montmorencys unduly animated and deplored
departures. Visitors took form gradually in his
household, coming out of a haze of rumour, and
seemed but lightly, pleasantly superimposed on the
vital pattern till a departure tore great shreds from
the season’s texture. Francie rubbed the palms of
her hands lightly on the tapestry of the chair-arms.
She knew that life was unkind and that Marda must
have begun at least to suspect this; she wondered
how much Marda had understood from the eau-de-Cologne.
Marda, turned half-away from them,
tapped a tune on the edge of the mantelpiece,
laughed at every shade of a silence and felt how
resolutely Hugo did not look at her now. There
was to be no opportunity for what he must not say
to be father painfully not said. Hugo wished
there had been a fire: the room was cold with rain
and branches went restlessly up and down beyond
the windows. Her face and figure, at which he
dared not look, compelled his imagination with
ghostly sharpness.
“You will have a very wet drive, I’m afraid,”
said Sir Richard finally. To Francie, the remark
had a faint echo. Had it been what she was going
to say, or had she once said it?
Outside in the hall, Livvy skidded over the edge
of a rug and came down heavily, knocking over a
wicker chair. The tennis ball bounced away,
Lois shrieked her condolences. They all made a
movement of consternation and were delighted.
Livvy came into luncheon fragrant with Pond’s
Extract, a shiny patch on her chin. She kept
putting up a finger and feeling the bump: David
must “kiss it better” for her to-morrow. David
should have witnessed her courage: he seemed
increasingly struck by her moral qualities; he had
never observed these things in a girl before. Yesterday
he had taken her over to tea at the Vermonts;
at her suggestion, they had “told” the Vermonts,
in confidence. It had been a success: she had
been made to feel at once she belonged to the
regiment. She had had no idea Mrs. Vermont was
so jolly; she had taken Livvy off for a real little
chat in her bedroom; they agreed what a rag it
would be if the regiment went to China. Livvy
looked voluptuously from Sir Richard to Lady
Naylor, thinking what a surprise she had here for
them both. She ate two helpings of fricasseed
chicken, in absolute silence, designing her trousseau
dressing-gown; and old Mr. Montmorency, who
sat beside her, did not speak either.
“I like lunch at one,” said Lady Naylor, surprised.
“It shortens the morning, but gives one
so much more time in the afternoon. I can’t think
why we don’t have it always.”
“I see no reason why we should not, my dear,”
said Sir Richard, who, unlike an English husband,
was not conservative in these matters.
The car came round twenty minutes too early,
but Sir Richard said the chauffeur was quite right.
He could hardly bear to let Marda drink her coffee
and was but slightly mollified when she burnt herself.
Mr. Montmorency sugared his coffee twice
over, to Livvy’s delight. They drank coffee out
in the hall, standing up; it was like the Passover.
Marda went upstairs and came down in her travelling
coat. Hugo stood at the foot of the stairs,
in the back hall, tightening the screws of his racquet
press.
“Good-bye,” she said. “Thank you for being
nice to me.”
“Oh,” said he, looking blindly at her with his
pale eyes, “have I been nice to you? Good!”
“Good-bye.”
“Good-bye—Marda.”
“Don’t come on to the steps—”
“No, I’ll finish this press—”
They both half-turned, heard the pendulum of
the clock swing once: she went on into the hall.
Everybody was there but Lois.
Lois stood behind the door in the drawing-room,
waiting. “Marda,” she said through the crack.
“Hullo?” said Marda. She came round the door,
pushing it a little way to behind her. They
kissed.
“Marda, I can’t—”
“Never mind.”
“Darling!”
“Be good!”
“Happy journey!”
“Oh yes.” They parted.
Marda came back to the hall, not looking at
anybody in particular, putting her gloves on. Lady
Naylor asked her if she had packed the cake.
Sir Richard patted her arm and said she was a
good girl and must be sure and be happy—then
looked very much abashed and startled at what
he had done. Laurence looked bored, so bored;
she was sorry for Laurence. She said: “I am really
going.” “I’m sorry you’re going, I don’t think
it’s—” They shook hands, he immediately
turned—rather rudely, his uncle thought, and
walked into the library.
After all, there were only Sir Richard and Lady
Naylor and Francie to wave Marda off from the
steps and watch the car up the avenue into a veil of
rain. Rather few, they felt, considering what a
dear she had been and how they had come to love
her. Wondering why and where the others had
gone, they tried to present the broadest possible
expanse of smile and flutter. And of this effort
the flick of Marda’s gloved finger-tips round the
hood conveyed the friendliest, the most satirical
recognition.
“Well, that’s that,” said Livvy, at last discovering
Lois in the drawing-room. “Partings make me
ever so sad. Now listen, Lois—”
“I’m afraid I’m not well, I’ve eaten something,”
said Lois. “I’m sorry—” She clapped her
handkerchief to her mouth and fled from the
drawing-room by the other door, stumbling over the
portière. Livvy went a little way after her, talking,
then came back: “It is a disadvantage to a girl,”
she reflected, “that kind of stomach.”
Lois found in the empty spare room a piece of
paper that crept on the floor like a living handkerchief.
Through the defenceless windows came in
the vacancy of the sky; the grey ceiling had gone
up in remoteness. More wind came through,
flowers moved in the vases, the pages of a book
left open beside the bed turned over hurriedly.
The pillow was dinted, as though half-way through
packing Marda had lain down lazily. Or as
though since last night the pillow had not forgotten
the feel of her head.
THE DEPARTURE OF GERALD
XVII
CAPTAIN and Mrs. Rolfe of the Gunners
were giving a dance in their hut. Denise
Rolfe and her dearest friend Betty Vermont
of the Rutlands had been more than busy the whole
morning. Flustered and happy, they darted about
the hut, cutting sandwiches, scattering floor powder,
pinning draperies round the walls. They masked
the electric lights with pink crinkly paper to produce
the desired enchantment. Every now and then,
one would collapse on to what remained of the furniture
and, catching the other’s eyes, burst into
delighted laughter. It was all such a rag. They
smoked cigarettes and ground the ash into the floor
to enrich the polish; they tried the new records over
again and again till Mrs. Rolfe declared that the
needles would give out and snapped down the lid
of the gramophone resolutely.
Mrs. Rolfe’s Colonel disapproved tacitly; Colonel
Boatley did not think the dance was a good idea
either. Entertainments in barracks had been given
up long ago. But it was not easy to veto what
ladies described as “a little fun in the huts.” Married
quarters in barracks were limited; as the army
of occupation was reinforced, lines of hutments
began to extend up the hill at the back of the Gunner
barracks. There was nothing to beat these hut
dances; for one thing, the floors were so springy.
And the fewer the couples, the more intimate the
occasion. Denise and Betty both thought with
contempt of the Rutlands’ official dance in the
barrack gymnasium, full of majors waltzing, where
you were nearly blown off the floor by the regimental
bassoon.
“All the same,” said Betty, rubbing a board with
her toe, a shade despondent, “I wish this would
polish more. You’re certain it won’t be sticky?”
“Nothing could be stickier than the C.O.,” said
Denise wittily. “If it wasn’t for him, we should
be keeping it up till breakfast.”
“It’s these wretched patrols and things,” said
Mrs. Vermont.
“It seems odd being short of girls. I do feel I
should be getting my sister over.”
“There will be heaps for to-night,” said Mrs.
Vermont, who thought people’s young sisters rather
a bother. The ladies of the neighbourhood had
praised Mrs. Rolfe’s kind intentions, but said that
they feared the roads were not fit for their girls these
nights. But their girls, meeting Mrs. Vermont at
the tennis club, had told her they would be certain
to come. “In fact, if they all come,” said Mrs.
Vermont, apprehensive, “I may have to telephone
down to the mess for some more of our boys.”
Captain Rolfe came off duty at lunch-time, and
during the afternoon friends kept dropping in, by
twos and singly, with offers to help.
“But don’t look!” shrieked Denise every time,
flinging herself against the wall to conceal the
draperies. “It’s all a surprise for to-night.” The
subalterns, after a hasty look round, prepared to
be perfectly blind. They began to slide industriously,
buffeted on the head by the Chinese lanterns
which Betty had hung too low. Tubby, Mr.
Simcox, sat down on a mat and was whisked round
the room by his friends to perform the functions
of polisher.
“Really,” volunteered some one, “we ought to
be rolling the floor with champagne bottles....”
Girls who succeeded in coming over for the dance
had arranged to be “put up” in Clonmore, or in
married quarters. The two Miss Raltes from
Castle Ralte in the Tipperary direction looked in
about four o’clock, pink from a twelve-mile drive
and parental opposition. Father, in fact, had been
more than difficult. “He says,” said Moira Ralte,
looking beatifically round at the decorations, “that
the whole proceeding is not only criminal but
lunatic. He says he can’t understand the C.O.
allowing it, with the country the way it is. We
really did think, till we got past the gates, he was
going to stop us.”
“But we came,” said Cicely. Every one laughed.
The Miss Raltes had been cast as wild young Irish
and rather liked themselves. But they exchanged
glances, uneasy. It had not been quite the thing,
perhaps, to have laughed at Father.
“It takes two to make a war,” said Mrs. Rolfe
wisely. “We’re not fighting.”
“More’s the pity,” said a Mr. Daventry of the
Rutlands with violence. “God, if they’d—”
The Miss Raltes, unaccustomed to swearing, looked
down their noses. There was a moment of slight
discomfort, of national consciousness.
“Wouldn’t it be a rag,” said Moira, relieving the
tension tactfully, “if they tried to fire in at the windows
while we were dancing?”
“I shall draw the curtains!” cried Mrs. Vermont.
Cicely glanced at the gramophone, hummed a
fox-trot and tapped her heel on the floor, looking
most unconscious. But the subalterns continued
to slide violently, rebounding against each other,
and dancing was not begun till the D.I.’s niece came
in. The D.I.’s niece came in with a flourish and
was greeted with uproar. She was priceless. She
had light-red hair fluffed over her forehead, a wide
smile punctuated by gaps in her teeth and tireless
repartee in a Cork accent. Denise and Betty
adored her. She was a Catholic, it seemed so queer
to think that she worshipped the Pope. The Miss
Raltes hardly knew her. As she came in, Daventry
opened his arms, she ran into them with a gurgle
and they began to dance. The gramophone spurted
hoarse music; other couples followed the gramophone.
Mr. Daventry, the senior subaltern, elegant, tall
and a shade satanic, was “taken,” obviously, with
the queer little person. She could talk and dance
at once with an equal skimmingness and she did.
Daventry shook her, murmuring: “Do shut up!”
He whispered into her hair that she danced
like thistledown and that he hated to have it
spoilt.
“Like how much?” shrieked the D.I.’s niece
above the music, bobbing her face up at him.
Mrs. Rolfe, as distracted hostess, allowed herself
to drift into the arms of the adjutant, who had
looked in for a moment or two. He spoke of himself
as a busy man, but she knew this to be a pose.
She danced remotely and kept repeating: “Glasses
for claret cup ... Glasses for cider cup ...
Cigarettes ... Cover the washstand ...”
“Washstand?” said the adjutant, solicitous.
“They will have to sit out in Percy’s and my bedroom.
Do you think it will matter?”
The adjutant took a firmer grip of Mrs. Rolfe,
an ethereal girl with a habit of drifting just out of
one’s reach like a kite. He gulped, and said rather
too genially: “It will be no end of a rag to-night.
We—we must make the most of it; it may be the
last for a bit. As it is, we’re doubling the guards.
The C.O.—”
“Pig!” said Denise, looking deep into the adjutant’s
eyes.
“Mum,” said the adjutant, blinking. “And
another thing: I’m afraid you won’t have Dobson of
the Rutlands, I’ve just met him—he’s to be out on
patrol.”
“Oh, but he said he’d get out of that! Oh, but
he promised me—”
“He’d no business to; he’s been due for patrol
for ages. Their C.O.—”
“He spoils everything. Captain Dobson is one
of my best dancers.” She stopped short and turned
off the gramophone. “Listen, Percy! They’re
sending Captain Dobson out on patrol at a moment’s
notice. Now I’d like to know what I’m supposed
to do? I’d calculated the numbers exactly.”
“But, Dens,” said her husband, conscientiously.
“We had four men spare. And you’re certain of
Lesworth and Armstrong.”
“He won’t count!” They all laughed: Betty
had told a few friends in confidence ...
“And for a matter of that,” Denise still clouded,
complained to the adjutant, “Mr. Lesworth won’t
count much either. He’s awfully keen on the
Farquar girl.”
The adjutant thought: “These attachments!”
His C.O. did not like these attachments, either.
The gramophone in a perceptibly minor key began
again, they went on dancing.
“Suppose,” said the D.I.’s niece, during an
interval, “all we girls are left sitting to-night and
nobody comes to dance with us?”
“Dance with each other,” said Cicely Ralte firmly.
“But I wouldn’t care to dance without men,”
said the D.I.’s niece, frankly languishing. She
had hoisted herself on to the cabinet that held the
records and sat swinging her legs in their shiny
stockings and pulling her dazzlingly checked skirt
over her knees. Her green eyes roamed round,
returning attention confidently.
Daventry, a hand on the edge of the cabinet, stood
leaning with his back to the wall’s art-muslin
draperies. He kept shutting his eyes; whenever
he stopped dancing he noticed that he had a headache.
He had been out in the mountains all night
and most of the morning, searching some houses
for guns that were known to be there. He had
received special orders to ransack the beds, and to
search with particular strictness the houses where
men were absent and women wept loudest and
prayed. Nearly all beds had contained very old
women or women with very new babies, but the
N.C.O., who was used to the work, insisted that
they must go through with it. Daventry still felt
sickish, still stifled with thick air and womanhood,
dazed from the din. Daventry had been shell-shocked,
he was now beginning to hate Ireland,
lyrically, explicitly; down to the very feel of the air
and smell of the water. If it were not for dancing a
good deal, whisky, bridge, ragging about in the
huts, whisky again, he did not know what would
become of him, he would go over the edge, quite
mad, he supposed. He opened his eyes: afternoon
light lay in bars on the smoky air. The flash of his
partner’s legs in their glassy stockings exasperated
him, he gripped one of her ankles—harshly, as
though it had been a man’s. She kicked, and a
high-heeled slipper went rocketing through the
air. A forest of hands went up. The D.I.’s niece
looked down complacently on the compact and
plaited backs of the subalterns. The other girls
tittered and hung on the outskirts.
“Oh, take care,” wailed Denise, “mind my
draperies!” She freed an end of the muslin and,
as no one listened, began with angry laughter to
pepper them all with floor-powder. The D.I.’s
niece looked at Daventry queerly and suddenly:
their eyes were now on a level. His eyes, dark
with fatigue and nervousness, were set in too close
together, like a good-looking shark’s.
Cicely Ralte yawned slightly; the struggle did
not abate. “We shall all be tired when it comes
to to-night,” she said to the adjutant.
But he said: “Here comes Miss Farquar, looking
as fresh as paint.”
Lois came to the door with David Armstrong.
Livvy would not come up to the hut till this evening,
she would be confused, she feared; she didn’t
know how much they knew. She was down in
Clonmore now, buying sophisticated-looking black
pansies to wear in her dress. She and Lois were
spending the night in Clonmore, with the Fogartys.
Lois was dazed still from her long drive under the
strained white sunless sky. Sir Richard and Lady
Naylor had viewed her departure with the gloomiest
apprehensions, but Francie had insisted she would
enjoy herself. It must be flat for her these few
days, Francie said, after Marda had gone. And
she had slipped a sachet of Californian Poppy into
the top of the suitcase, with Lois’s green tulle dress.
Lois and David looked through the door at the
young men all in a tangle with a sensation of helplessness,
as though it devolved on themselves to
unwind them. Then they stepped in and shook
hands with Mrs. Rolfe and her girl friends. Lois,
pleasing the adjutant by her freshness, wore a light-blue
felt hat and a blue cardigan. She suspected
she should not be walking about the camp without
a chaperon, but could not see how to avoid this:
she had come up here to look for Mrs. Vermont.
She went pink from the heat of the room and felt
Mr. Daventry look at her—then shut his eyes
again. There was a desperation about Mr. Daventry
she could have loved. But he apparently
craved relaxation: she had found out she did not
relax Mr. Daventry.
Gerald was not here—she guessed from the eyes
of commiseration. He was a serious dancer and
did not care to tire himself by sliding. Possibly
he was on duty, possibly would be waiting at Mr.
Fogarty’s. Now, she could remember nothing of
him but the leg he had drawn so tenderly into the
armoured car. She had heard nothing of him from
that moment; he might have been sealed up permanently
in tin, like a lobster. Did he regret the
kiss?—he had not added a word to it.
Mr. Simcox, the fattest and sweetest of all the
Gunners, started the gramophone with an eye on
herself and came to ask for a dance. He looked
so hot, she said she would rather wait till the evening.
“Remember,” said Mr. Simcox, spreading
a hand on his heart. And by some mysterious
evocation, the hut, lit up, vibrated; the air was
warm like smoke on her cool arm, and she went
throbbing along with Gerald, feeling his hand on
her back through her thin dress—too near to see
each other—his lashes reverent by her hair. She
thought she need not worry about her youth; it
wasted itself spontaneously, like sunshine elsewhere
or firelight in an empty room.
She thanked Mr. Simcox and said she would keep
number six and would not lose count. Mrs. Vermont,
looking peevish suddenly, said it was tea-time
now and shooed the young men out of the
hut like chickens. They dispersed through the
mud in the tired, wise light of the afternoon.
That evening a wind came up. Lois and Livvy
dressed in Mrs. Fogarty’s spare room, stumbling
round the edge of the large bed. They took turns
at the looking-glass; in the intervals of their toilet
they ran to the window to look out. It was strange
and pleasant to Lois to be in a town again. The
square, where some crisp leaves whirled autumnly,
was pervaded by an excitement. Though only
twelve couples had been invited to Mrs. Rolfe’s
dance, all Clonmore seemed to know of it. People
kept coming out quickly through the swing doors
of the Imperial. Some one played half a waltz and
broke off, discouraged; two commercial travellers
clapped one another on the shoulder. Livvy
pinned the black pansies under her bosom and
turned to invite admiration. Lois thought the
pansies looked common, but, knowing they must
have cost four-and-six, said they were most original.
Lois’s green tulle dress slipped over her head like a
cataract. She shone, coming out through the top
of it. If only Marda could see her ... It was
half-past six: she had promised herself to think of
Marda.
They were dressing early, they were to dine with
a Mrs. Perkins up in the huts. Mrs. Perkins could
not promise there would be much for dinner, but
after all this was Ireland and it would be rather
jolly.
Captain Vermont was to call for them: they
buttoned their over-coats over their ball-dresses.
Mrs. Fogarty kissed them half-way downstairs,
and warned them not to break hearts. She would
see them later, she was coming to watch the dance.
Since the acquisition of Betty, Captain Vermont’s
stock of conversation to pretty young things had
given out naturally; biologically the time was past
for it. They walked rather silently up past the
barracks and picked their way over the mud between
the huts. A chill of darkness was coming down on
the air. The wind came, knife-like, down through
the lines of huts from the mountain, over a gulf of
land where the farms were dark—apprehensive,
the young girls patted the whorls of their hair.
The Perkins’ hut exposed a flank to the wind; it
was chilly, one slipped one’s bare arms out of one’s
coat reluctantly, going to table.
The dinner was not so jolly as Lois had feared.
Mrs. Perkins looked distraite and had a whispered
argument with her husband about a tin-opener.
Mrs. Vermont could talk of nothing but poor
Denise (“As though,” said Livvy, “she were having
at least a baby instead of only a dance”). Captain
Perkins and Captain Vermont apologized repeatedly
to the girls for being old and married; their
wives told them not to be so silly. Their wives
said the girls could perfectly well see there was no
room for young men here; already their six chairs
grated against the match-boarding. The girls
would have young men in the course of the evening.
Lois agreed politely, but Livvy wished they had
stayed to dinner down in Clonmore where one
could have at least watched Mr. Fogarty drink.
She sat squinting, watching the wasted powder
flake off her nose.
A bottle of white wine was divided among the
ladies with depressing impartiality; the men drank
whisky. Mrs. Perkins’ pince-nez glittered with
more animation. But the wind like a lunatic
fidgeted with the hut, frames creaked, doors rattled,
a shudder went down the walls; a gust through a
crack set the lights dementedly swinging. During
a strained little silence, between two gusts of the
wind, Mrs. Vermont observed that an angel must
be passing over the house; she wanted them to
listen for its wings. They listened; they thought
of empty country blotted out by the darkness.
“Quiet here, isn’t it?” said Mrs. Perkins.
“Better not circulate too far between the dances,”
said Captain Perkins, “and don’t go down to the
wires. It’s dark, for one thing; we don’t want any
of these girls lost.”
“Grandpa!” said Mrs. Vermont. Livvy noted,
there seemed some communal feeling between the
married: any wife could be faintly rude to anyone
else’s husband. “I don’t go for walks between
dances,” said Livvy, bridling.
“You don’t know what you’ll do now!” said Mrs.
Vermont, and they all laughed.
Lois was anxious, there was a tight little ball in
her throat; she could hardly swallow. She was
always “strung-up” before a dance. But to-night
it was worse; she had not the expectation of being
claimed: she was really doubtful. She had not had
a word from Gerald; he hadn’t been round to the
Fogartys’. Was she not nice to kiss; was he disappointed?
Her green frock glinted under the
light; she kept looking down at her breast, and into
her lap, where the folds ran off in shadow under the
table. If he were not there when she came, if she
did not see him before he saw her (as she came uphill
in the dark) standing full in pink light by the
door, staring eagerly on to the slab of darkness that
was to give her up—she should die, she thought.
For this morning she had written to Viola that she
intended to marry Gerald.
XVIII
THE Rolfes’ door swung open and shut;
bursts from the gramophone came downhill
like somebody coughing. As the
Perkins’ party stepped up from the duckboards
Gerald spun past the door with the D.I.’s niece,
in a nimbus of gauze draperies. The room was
sticky with strawberry light, unlit lanterns wobbled
between the electric light cords; the dancers seemed
to be moving slowly in jam. A group of young
men stood by the door, coughing. But one hadn’t
yet made one’s official appearance: Lois blinked and
began to tug out her silver shoes from her pockets;
somebody pulled her on down a passage to change.
In what Denise called the kitchenette at the end
of the passage the five spare men were smoking,
looking into their glasses of whisky and wishing to
play bridge. Lois looked in and they all waved to
her, but Livvy pulled her away quickly: she said
that must be the gentlemen’s cloak-room. Lois
met, with surprise, her own eyes of interrogation
in six inches of mirror between the coats.
David came to claim Livvy, Betty went swooning
off over the chalky lake of the floor with Mr. Simcox,
Mr. Daventry stared at the passage door with
severity, balanced his cigarette on the rim of the
gramophone and came up to Lois and frowned, without
speaking. He opened his arms slowly. They
danced; she had no idea she could dance so beautifully.
At the end of the record Mr. Daventry impassively
moved back the needle again. “Tiring day,” he said.
“Oh, I don’t think so.” They went on dancing.
The D.I.’s niece picked off ends of her tangerine
draperies from various parts of Gerald and walked
away with an aquiline-looking gunner. Over Lois’s
temple Mr. Daventry’s jaw moved slightly; his neck
muscles strained. Again he revived the gramophone.
Lois, breathless, said: “Isn’t there going to be an
interval?” “Not necessarily,” replied Mr. Daventry.
Meanwhile, one wall of the hut seemed
propped against Gerald’s rigid, resentful back.
“What a crowd ...”
“I beg your pardon?”
She did not speak again. Anxiously dancing, she
merely constituted Mr. Daventry’s revenge. Mrs.
Vermont, going past Gerald, said: “Oh, diddums?”
She asked Mr. Simcox if he had noticed, nice-looking
boys looked their nicest sulky? Mr. Simcox,
looking round so carefully that he missed a step, said
he would not call that sulky ... More worried.
“Nonsense, Tubby, what’s he got to worry about?”
“You never know.”
Mr. Simcox was a bit of a philosopher, because
he was so fat. He gave up Mrs. Vermont with a
sigh to another young man and went across for
somebody’s young, shy sister. “No luck?” he said
on the way, to Gerald. And Gerald looked at him
candidly, with despair.
The evening “went” with a rush, with a kind of
high impetuousness out of everybody’s control.
Every one looked and spoke and danced close up
with a kind of exalted helplessness; intimacy tightened
the very air. Sandwiches were ambrosia,
brightening the eyes; rims of plates went electric
where fingers touched. Mrs. Rolfe laughed all
the time, you would have said with despair. She
climbed past couples very close up at the darkest
part of the passage, she entered the kitchenette
with a shriek and swept some cards from the table.
The spare men danced with each other. She ran
in and out of her bedroom, shaking a plate of chocolates
at the couples sitting out on the chest-o’-drawers
and on the washstand covered with Turkish
cushions. If the hut had risen and soared up into
the air, so that some one stepping out at the door
had to step back dizzily, she would hardly have been
surprised. Indeed, two subalterns running down
to the mess for more siphons did leap to the mud
as from a great height.
The room was hot; they drew the curtains back
and opened the windows, then were stared in at
oddly by hard little squares of night. Couples
went out for walks, to cool their faces. Livvy was
kissed twice and went off to powder her chin. “Of
course, this is post-war madness,” said Mr. Simcox,
standing beside a window.
“Oh yes,” agreed Lois.
“Awful, really.... I expect you understand
what I mean?”
“Oh yes.” Wishing Mr. Simcox were not
intrigued, she put her two hands out of the window,
as into a well, to feel wind cold on her wrists.
Gerald came up behind her.
“Mine next,” he said, as though they had just
parted. “What a row!” he yelled.
“This jazz,” said Simcox. “They ought to have
let me bring my band,” complained Gerald, “it
wouldn’t have taken up much more room than Mrs.
Fogarty.”
Mrs. Fogarty had indeed come in and sat at the
end of the room in a purple tea-gown. Her circumference
was enormous, her feet stuck out
beyond it—but she was such a darling. Every time
a couple stumbled over her feet she beamed and
nodded in the friendliest way. She had just whispered
to Gerald, who brought her a glass of lemonade:
“Here, where’s your girl?” And her eyes had
rolled at him, dark with worry. Gerald could not
have borne to disappoint Mrs. Fogarty.
Gerald did not dance silently. His hand supported
her wrist, cool and familiar. Lois felt she was
home again; safe from deserted rooms, the penetration
of silences, rain, homelessness. Nothing mattered:
she could have gone to sleep. But he woke her.
“Look here: what have I done?”
“How—?” said she, quite inadequate.
“You know. But why are you—why must we—?”
“Gerald—oh, do be—sssh!”
A couple sheered off from them.
“I didn’t think you’d be cruel,” he said to her
hair, almost confidentially.
“But it’s you who’ve been cutting me.”
“But how? When? You’ve never once looked—Lois,
you’re lovely, but you’re so—”
“Look here, we can’t talk and dance.”
“Which does that mean you don’t want to do?”
She looked at a button of his mess coat. “Talk,”
she said after a little contented interval. He slid
his hand up her wrist, they danced on. The D.I.’s
niece trailed past them, laughing at Daventry: they
had a pool of space to themselves on the crowded
floor. The pink room melted round, beatific and
syrupy. He was closer than ever under the lovely
compulsion of movement.
“You do dance divinely.”
“What?” he said, like the ghost of Daventry.
Some one stopped the gramophone, they looked at
each other, shocked. Something had made him
absurdly unhappy: she would have liked to have
comforted him.
“Let’s go out.”
“Won’t it be cold for you?”
“Gerald,” said she, discouraged, “don’t be an aunt.”
The wind whipped round the edge of the hut, ran
through her hair at the roots and stung her ears—a
sinister energy in this fixed and angular world, for
one could not see anything moving. Gerald
walked, unknown, beside her, up in the dark. “At
one time,” said Lois, wrapping her wild skirts
round her, “a girl would have died of this.”
“Cigarette?”
“Oh—will it light here?”
“I can light one most places.” So she bent over
his hands, a cup of fire. There were two bright
specks in his eyes.—Then the match whirled off
and died on the dark. “I can’t think what you
think has gone wrong,” she said.
“You were so queer that Thursday. You’d been
like part of me, the night before; then everything
seemed—wrong. I dare say I was a brute; I
oughtn’t to have—though as a matter of fact I’ll
never be sorry.... If you’d been just angry or
anything ... But you seemed to go right away:
I didn’t know where I was. All lunch you were
like a girl at a tennis club. Then you left me down
there with them all to talk rot and went off with
that beastly gramophone.”
“That was not my fault—did you want me to
listen to you talking rot?—Gerald, I didn’t realize
you were resentful; I didn’t think you could be....
I was waiting for you to write.”
“I began so many letters, I used half a box of
note-paper. I couldn’t think what to say.”
“Still, you might have written.”
“But how?” he said candidly.
She could not remember, though she had read
so many books, who spoke first after a kiss had
been, not exchanged but—administered. The two
reactions, outrage, capitulation, had not been her
own. “You were hoping I would write?” she said,
seeing light suddenly.
“You see, you had always been so understanding.”
“But, Gerald, I should have thought you’d have
been shocked if I’d—”
“Oh?... Perhaps I would. But I wanted
something to make things natural. I shall never
forget what I felt in that armoured car. You will
always be connected up in my mind with the smell
of oil—Lois, do you think I am terribly introspective?”
“You know, you were tired.”
“Perhaps it was that,” he said, puzzled. “But
bumping along back to barracks, and you going in
again with that girl to that topping house ...”
“Do you think it’s a topping house?”
“It seems so to me.”
This new version of the changeable afternoon was
a shock to her. It had gone on for him, too; doors
that she had not thought of shutting and windows
opening, the drone in the drawing-room, rain with
a different importance. Might she perhaps have
thought more about Gerald and wondered less?
Splashing along the brown road to Clonmore she
could now see the armoured car diminish—with
Gerald its only nerve. But she thought of the
empty spare room and how it avenged him.
“Marda’s gone, you know.”
“But she had just come to lunch, surely?”
“Gerald!... Can’t you feel any difference
between some one to lunch and somebody staying?”
“She hadn’t a hat,” said Gerald after consideration.
“She went two days ago: she’s in Kent now.”
“I’m sorry,” said Gerald civilly. Feeling a
strained, fierce pause, he added: “She seemed
awfully nice, I thought.”
“Don’t you wonder at all if I miss her?”
“I expect you must. I always miss visitors,
though they’re a bother beforehand.”
“She hadn’t any beforehand—that seems so odd
now.”
“Lois ... you aren’t angry, then?”
“Oh?” Recollecting herself, she looked round the
darkness vaguely. A couple were coming towards
them; she put a hand on his sleeve to make him be
quiet, his other hand came over it. They heard
Daventry’s angry laugh, his partner’s feet ran stickily
on the duckboards. Gerald and Daventry passed in
the dark with, it seemed, a queer silent interchange.
“Mr. Daventry seems old to be a subaltern.”
“It’s absurd that he should be—all this peacetime
bother. He had a company in France in 1916,
later on he was acting major. He’s a splendid
fellow, I’m sorry you haven’t seen more of him.
He won’t go about much, outside barracks. The
fact is,” he added apologetic, “he’s sick at being
over here. It doesn’t seem to agree with him.”
“Do you really like it?”
“Oh, well, it’s a job. Though I rather see
Daventry’s point—it doesn’t seem natural.”
They had come to the end of the huts—the
foot of the steep slope a wall, the top heavily wired.
Under the wall a sentry inhumanly paced like a
pendulum. The country bore in it strong menace.
Gerald looked out at it, his face blinking in and
out of the dark, faintly red with the pulse of his
cigarette. She nursed her bare elbows, unconsciously
shivering. He seemed at once close and
remote, known and un-personal; she understood
why, up to now, she had searched for him vainly in
what he said. He had nothing to do with expression.
She put out a hand to where he was, shadowy
and palpable. He threw his cigarette away, turned—and
said nothing. The sentry passed.
They went back the way they had come, between
the huts.
“Gerald, I wasn’t angry ... at what you did....”
“No, you were wonderful all the time.”
“Don’t you understand?” she said sharply—“Gerald?”
“Understand?... Lois!”
While they kissed, she heard, in the silence of
their footsteps, some one moving about in a hut up
the lines. The sound was a long way off, at the
other side of a stillness.
“Your arms are so cold.”
“I’ve been so lonely.”
“They’re so cold.” He kissed them, inside the
elbows. Later: “I like the back of your head,”
she said with exploring finger-tips.
“I never thought you looked at me.”
“Gerald, I’ve been so ... vacant.”
“I never thought you wanted me.”
“I—” she began. The soft sound of her dress
in the wind became, by some connection of mood,
painfully inexplicable to her—the pain was its own,
from not being understood. “Gerald, your buttons
hurt rather.”
“My darling—” He let her go, but still,
above consciousness, held one of her hands,
solemnly. “Shall you really be able to marry me?”
“I don’t know till you’ve asked me.”
“Don’t laugh—” he cried.
“Can’t you hear I’m not laughing?”
“Lois—” Something more was coming; she
waited, hearing him draw a breath. “Let’s go back
and dance,” he said almost religiously—“shall we?”
The hut was compact with movement: she stood
back in alarm, as before a revolving door in destructive
motion. Now it was gone, she remembered
sharply the smell of earth.... David Armstrong
leaned from his partner wildly and struck Gerald
over the head with a red balloon.
Mrs. Rolfe had had an idea that the dance might
well finish up with a cotillion. She was vague
about cotillions, but towards this end she had distributed
balloons, whistles that ran out long
tongues when you blew them, and streamers from
striped cardboard batons with which dancers might
hit one another over the head. Mrs. Vermont
thought these things went better with fancy dress,
but Denise said a rag was a rag at any time. Girls
ducked and shrieked and waved their streamers over
their partners’ shoulders. Denise, radiant in black
with a trail of nasturtiums, was waltzing—affair of
prolonged “hesitations”—with Betty’s husband.
She bit off a streamer, spat out a mouthful of paper
and said, with a shiver of happiness: “Isn’t it marvellous,
Timmy? I can hardly believe I’m awake!”
“Ra-ther!” replied Captain Vermont, with blurred
enthusiasm. He was being buffeted by Mr. Simcox
and somebody’s sister.
“Betty’s been just too marvellous,” went on
Denise—“Oh, Timmy, do have a shot at Reggie
Daventry—there, with the girl in scarlet. He looks
just too refined!”
But Timmy failed to find Daventry. “Betty’s
tons the prettiest here,” cried Denise, ecstatic.
“Oh, come!” expostulated Captain Vermont,
squeezing her waist. It gave him a warm, tender
feeling to think how fond she and Betty were of
each other.
“Tell me,” said Denise, as nearly as possible
snuggling, “are we terribly reckless? Would this
annoy the Irish?”
“They won’t know.”
“They have heaps of spies.”
“I say, sssh, Denise, there are heaps of them here
to-night.”
“Spies?”
“Irish—the Raltes and Co.”
“They’re different.”
“Still, they’ve got feelings.”
Denise sighed. “I could go on like this for
ever.” But Captain Vermont rather thought
he would like a drink. A balloon exploded.
“Glory!” cried Mrs. Fogarty. So they burst four
more to keep her amused.
“Is this like a bombardment?” asked Moira Ralte.
“No,” said Mr. Simcox.
If they were not careful, they would knock over
the gramophone. Mr. Daventry thought it was
time they did. It was time something happened.
He danced the D.I.’s niece down the passage and
kissed her with her head pressed back in the coats.
She struggled, futile, slippery as a weasel. As he
kissed again her face went stiff and she shut her
eyes. When these opened, they were as shrewd as
ever: still he did not know what she thought. The
drums in his temples were now insistent; he could
not forget them even while he was dancing. She
had dabbed herself over with White Rose. Her
frizzy hair tickled his mouth as he bent close to her.
“Do you get kissed a lot?”
“Englishmen never could keep their mouths to
themselves.”
“You won’t know yourself when we’re gone!”
“You should get back home while you can, the
lot of you.”
“What would become of Uncle?”
“Did you like your whisky?” She put a hand
up rudely to shield herself from his breath. This
reminded Daventry, who let go of the common little
hell-cat abruptly and walked away to the kitchenette,
where he heard a siphon. Lois stood in the door,
waiting while David got her some soda-water.
But wouldn’t she try a little something? Just a
little something to dance on—no? Daventry,
standing back and tilting his drink about in his
glass, stared at her feet with owlish ferocity.
“Sorry about your silver shoes, Miss Farquar.”
“There are some beautiful walks round here,”
said David, grinning.
“Miss Farquar should float, not walk; she looks
like a water-lily,” said Daventry, looking over her
green frock with his discomforting eyes. “Come
on and dance,” said David, taking her empty glass.
Lois began to say she was keeping the next for
Gerald. But: “Miss Farquar and I are hungry, we
are going to find a sandwich,” said Daventry.
In the box of a dining-room plates of dishevelled
sandwiches sat in unmasked electric light. There
was no one there. Mr. Daventry, looking hard at
her, put the palm of his hand to his left temple with
a curious, listening air, as though to see if a watch
had stopped.
“Chicken and ham,” he said, “tongue and turkey;
they’re all cat, they say.” (“What shall I say?”
thought Lois.) He looked at a chair with contempt,
then sat down on it. “I don’t think I’ve
met you before,” he continued.
“Perhaps you didn’t notice.”
“Dear me,” said Mr. Daventry, looking into a
sandwich. “No, I don’t think it could have been
that.”
“Then it can’t be explained,” said Lois, and (she
felt) glittered excitedly. He suggested the army
of Wellington; buckskins. Looking up thoughtfully,
he directed upon the wall just over her head
his strained dark look that was almost a squint.
“You live round here?”
“More or less—” She was startled to meet
the dark look on a level. Hers was, he said, a
remarkably beautiful country.
“I am afraid you—”
He affably shrugged. Did that matter? He
stared at her arms, at the inside of her elbows, with
such intensity, she felt Gerald’s kisses were printed
there. Was this a bounder?—She knew she had
no criterion.
“Have a nice walk?” he inquired.
“Did you?” she countered.
“I expect so,” said Mr. Daventry, after consideration.
“As a matter of fact, I am not quite at
my best.” They looked hard at each other. “Nothing,”
he said, “appeals to me.” She moved her
arms nervously on the silk of her dress. For she
saw there was not a man here, hardly even a person.
“How do you mean ‘more or less’?” he said
suddenly.
“Well, I don’t live anywhere, really.”
“I do: I live near Birmingham.” He put the
half-eaten sandwich down, with distaste, on the edge
of the cloth and pulled up a plate to cover it. She felt
she was quite finished with. Suppose, she thought,
they were all like this! Should she go? She made
a movement, he did not see; she was disappointed.
He put the hand to his temple, again listening.
“Tired?”
“Oh no,” he said, with irony.
“I’m going back now.”
“Such a pity. Anyone so charming ...”
“Well, I’m bored,” she said.
“It’s a pity you don’t know about my head, it’s a
most curious head, it would interest you....
How shall I keep you? Look here, seriously, about
Lesworth—”
“Oh?” she inquired, suddenly cold inside.
“About our young friend—” He pulled up
his chair close; she had a feeling like gates shutting.
“Tell me this—”
But the roar of merriment, solid and swerving
evenly as a waterfall past the door, splintered off in
a crash. Silence came, with hard impact. “Thank
God, they’ve upset the gramophone!” Daventry
smacked his knee, remotely, as though rehearsing
the gesture. His look decomposed in laughter.
“Done in,” he said, drawing life from the thought.
Simultaneously, a universal shriek went up: it was
smashed, finished. “Really,” she thought, “you
laugh like Satan!”
“Well, well,” said Daventry, tilting his drink
about, “it’s been a pleasant evening.” Here they all
came—a stampede in the passage. She was glad
of them, for under the storm of his mirth that swept
their island, disarranging the interlude, she had sat
cold and desolate. A gramophone passing, a
gramophone less in the world, it was not funny.
But between bursts of laughter she had felt him look
at her lips, at her arms, at her dress, like a ghost,
with nostalgia and cold curiosity. About their
young friend?—she wasn’t to know.
Mrs. Vermont seemed broken also, she leaned
on the adjutant. “Stay her with sandwiches,” called
out somebody, “comfort her with—with—more
sandwiches!” Moira mopped her eyes with a trail
of her dress, but nobody noticed. They jostled
about the table. Plates rang, shunted in all directions.
“Sitting in here?” cried Gerald, exalted,
“splendid!” Somebody waved a mouth-organ:
could one dance to that? More and more squeezed
in at the door: the room would burst. The cracks
of the walls that had been straight a minute ago like
bars now seemed to bulge out visibly: light glared
down on the resolution of backs and pink, reaching
arms. “Our young friend, our young friend, our
young friend,” thought Lois, and watched Gerald.
Though she watched wherever he went, she could
not see him. There was nothing, in fact, to which
to attach her look except his smoothness and roundness
of head, which seemed for the first time remarkable.
She looked for his mouth—which had
kissed her—but found it no different from mouths
of other young men who had also been strolling
and pausing between the huts in the dark. The
page of the evening was asterisked over with fervent
imaginary kisses. And one single kiss in the wind,
in the dark was no longer particularized: she could
not remember herself, or remember him.
As he came up, she looked quickly away. She
looked at an empty plate down on the floor, at a
thin disk of cucumber flaccid against its rim.
“What have I done?” she thought: she looked at
the plate with dread. And: “Oh, sandwich?” said
Gerald, turning to bring up some more. “... Or
perhaps it will seem natural to-morrow?” Nothing
could keep her from having to eat a sandwich.
“Darling ...” he whispered, brushing against her
shoulder.
“Tired?” asked Mr. Simcox, seeing her face.
“Oh no,” she said, with Mr. Daventry’s best irony.
XIX
MR. and Mrs. Montmorency were sitting
on the steps as Lois drove up the avenue.
Francie waved, Hugo looked warily
round the Spectator. “Well ...?” cried Francie,
as Lois came into ear-shot. Above, twenty dark
windows stared over the fields aloofly out of the
light grey face of the house. The trees had rims
of light round them; everything seemed a long way
away. With a sigh, Hugo put down the Spectator
and came to lift Lois’s suitcase out of the trap.
“Well ...?”
“Oh, marvellous.... But what do you think:
we broke the gramophone!”
“Oh, the poor gramophone!”
“It was the Gunners’ gramophone.... Where
are the others?”
“We have no idea.”
The Montmorencys now felt certain it must be
a tiring day: even Lois looked pale. They had
been having an intimate conversation about the
future, both with a sense of courage as from sweeping
aside some decency. Why not, Hugo had said,
build a bungalow somewhere? “With no stairs?”
Francie kindled at the idea, slipping a hand under
Hugo’s. “And live there always?” Certainly—why
not?—they would un-store the furniture. And
at the thought of their tables and sofas coming
again out of limbo, Hugo’s face was illumined by a
look of defiance.
“But where would we build?” said Francie,
wrinkled up with delightful anxiety. Hugo said
they would motor round for a bit and no doubt
some idea would suggest itself. “We could choose
the view,” said Francie. But at this point, for
some reason, he had taken up the Spectator.
The man came round for the pony: Lois sat
down on the steps and began to chatter. It was
surprising, really, how much had occurred. And
fancy, the Colonel had been furious.... Even
Hugo listened with some attention. “Dear me,”
he said when they heard about Mr. Daventry.
Francie expected it must be a great relief for a man
in that state of mind to meet a girl to whom he could
really talk. “But he didn’t talk; he really was most
extraordinary. Of course, he was once a major.”
Francie wished she had seen her go off in that green
frock—all, how should she say? like a poppy, only
a different colour. Would Lois put it on for them
all to-night?
“It’s not really a frock one sits in,” said Lois
discouragingly. Francie said it was almost a pity
in some ways that Laurence was so intellectual.
“I know, we’ll make Hugo waltz with you, he
waltzes beautifully.” But the thought of Hugo
waltzing—as Hugo suspected—made Lois melancholy.
Laurence, disturbed by her voice, shut an upstairs
window. His industry nowadays was remarkable.
He dragged at his hair and stared at the
trees through a flawed pane, across which Laura
Naylor had scratched her name with a diamond.
At his elbows, books were in toppling stacks; movement
produced an avalanche. A wasp hung round
him, tentative, scrawling Z’s on the air. “Go
away,” he muttered, “you are superfluous.”
Finally, he was obliged to open the door and shoo
the wasp out of it; it undulated across the landing
and in at the half-open door of Marda’s room, as
though it had an appointment. Though he did
not care for the wasp, Laurence went in after it, to
see if she had not left South Wind behind. She had
indeed—which was like her. The wasp dithered
above the looking-glass in triumph; he took aim
with the book and almost hit it. An eight-day
clock still ticked; it was five to four, it would soon
be tea-time.
As he came out, Lois appeared at the top of the
stairs, carrying a suitcase.
“Hullo! what have you brought that up for?”
“Oh yes,” she said, putting it down in surprise.
“I meant to have left it half-way.”
“Well—?”
“Really,” she cried, unreasonably, “this house
is nothing but Montmorencys; they are an absolute
state of mind.... I only wanted to see if you
were here.”
“Well, I’m not, practically: I’m working.”
“Oh—why do you work in the spare room?”
“I was dealing with a wasp.”
“Laurence, I had a marvellous dance.”
“Splendid!” He turned to his door, but she,
in tremendous need of his un-sympathy, brought out,
imploringly: “They were all there, every one. And,
my dear, the wind; I thought the hut would be
blown away. And we broke the gramophone.
There was a most sinister man called Daventry,
with shell-shock ...”
“Good,” said Laurence, “and you look sleepy!”
Lois, lamblike under the force of suggestion,
leaned back against the banisters, yawning.
“Livvy kicked all night, she will be a horrible wife....
Laurence, I wish you would tell me something
to read.”
“I should go to sleep.”
The idea seemed grateful: she thought of her
room with the high ceiling, the foreign touch to
the cheeks of afternoon pillows, the delicious crime
of crossing one’s stockinged ankles over the rucked-back
quilt and the slow recession of fact down a
long tunnel till the windows stretched and faded.
But, pulling at her fingers, she said impatiently:
“But I want to begin on something; I do think,
Laurence, you might understand. There must be
some way for me to begin. You keep on looking
into rooms where I am with silent contempt—what
do you think I am for?”
He leaned against the frame of his doorway, looking
at her with surprise and a degree of humanity.
To-day four weeks, Term would have begun again;
he did for a moment stretch to an effort of comprehension:
there was nothing for her to go on with.
The vacancy, more than negative to him, which
had succeeded Marda made the natural claims of a
life on his young cousin. With that concession to
fancy one makes for the doomed or the very weak,
he suggested she should go on with her German.
He gave her two grammars, a dictionary and a
novel of Mann’s, which she took from him doubtfully.
When he was back at his table, his door
ajar, she went across stealthily to the door opposite.
“There’s a wasp in there,” called out Lawrence.
“Oh, I just thought I’d see if ...”
But she went downstairs, defeated, forgetting
her suitcase.
She had not seen Gerald again this morning,
though all contracted with apprehension she had
waited in Mrs. Fogarty’s drawing-room—the multiplicity
of the photographed young men’s faces,
candid and vigorous, further appalling her. An
orderly had come down with a note from barracks.
The crested envelope, handed in with its air of a
claim on her, had austerity, like some limb of an
institution. She lost her last sense of Gerald, she
felt committed. Fumbling open the envelope,
asking: “What have I done?” she wondered what
had become of that last lonely disk of cucumber on
the plate. After “My darling darling”—she was
reprieved, provisionally; Mrs. Fogarty, coming in
in a wrapper—greatly worn, she said, after last
night’s gaiety—had insisted that if she would not
drink port she must drink milk—it was a long
morning—and eat some of this nice sponge cake.
And: “I know who has been breaking hearts!”
said Mrs. Fogarty, knifing the sponge cake which
was moist and eggy and “gave” to the knife deliciously,
like an eiderdown.
The ante-room chairs, now looking at Lois
askance, knew also. What she had done stretched
everywhere, like a net. If she had taken a life, the
simplest objects could not more have been tinged
with consequence. The graded elephants on the
bookcases were all fatality. She went into her
room hurriedly. “All the same,” she thought,
looking round with patronage at the virginal wall-paper,
“it is something definite.” And with curiosity,
with complicity almost, she looked at herself
in the glass.
Gerald’s straight, round writing had—to her
imagination—a queer totter, like some one running
for life in tight shoes.
“—I have so much to say to you, though there is
all time now there seems to be no time. Lois,
when I am with you you make me awfully dumb
with your darling wide-awake eyes, and when we
are apart you seem so close I feel you must understand,
so why try to explain when I am so stupid?
So I won’t try to say what I feel; all that matters is
that you are beautifully beautiful. Sometimes, till
now, I have felt you must think me awfully stupid
and introspective and dull; I have wondered so
much what you did think about all the time: it seems
unbelievable now that I am really to know. You
seemed so complicated, it was cheek to associate
you with the sort of person that I am, and now you
are lovely and simple and all mine. Last night
doesn’t seem like part of my life at all—I can’t
believe it was me who danced and drank whiskies
and tinkered about with the gramophone—and yet
it’s the reallest thing ever. And what I am doing
this morning seems so important—although it
keeps me away from you—because I am doing it
for you. It is awful to think of you here in Clonmore
and not to be able to get to you, and yet it is
wonderful to think of you waiting, and of who you
are waiting for being me. Lois, your dear cold
arms were so lovely, I mustn’t think of them now.
All your life I am going to keep you and wrap you
up and protect you and never let you be cold again.
It is awful to think you have ever been lonely and
sad—you are so brave, you know, and I never
guessed—and yet I am almost glad of that, because
it makes some reason for me. Darling, I kiss the
thought of you and feel so terribly humble. I must
not write more now. If you can, leave a letter for
me at the Fogartys’. Does she guess? I thought
perhaps you might like to confide in her. But of
course I will tell nobody, as you wish. Good-bye,
my most beautiful woman; I cannot write how I
love you.
“Gerald.”
Folding the sheets again in their order, she
thought: “It is you who are beautiful,” and later:
“If this thing is so perfect to anyone, can one be
wrong?” An escape of sunshine, penetrating the
pale sky in the south-west, altered the room like a
revelation. Noiselessly, a sweet-pea moulted its
petals on to the writing-table, leaving a bare pistil.
The pink butterfly flowers, transparently balancing,
were shadowed faintly with blue as by an intuition
of death. Lois bowed forward, her forehead against
the edge of the table.
Steps in the ante-room; she slipped the letter
under the blotter and turned round consciously.
“I hear you are back,” said Lady Naylor, entering.
“I hear it was such a success that they broke the
gramophone. Now I want to hear all about it.”
She sat down.
“Well, to begin with—”
“One moment—have you unpacked your
frock?”
“Oh! I left my suitcase.... I went up to
Laurence to borrow a German grammar.”
“Oh, I shouldn’t go on with German,” said
Lady Naylor, “it still offends so many people;
Italian is prettier and more practical. I could
lend you Il Piccolo Mondo Antico, or Dante—
However, tell me about the dance.”
“Well, first of all—”
“—By the way, I’ve just heard from Marda.
She has arrived quite safely, I’m glad to say. She
says Kent is dull, which I dare say it would be, but
of course she is glad to be with Leslie.”
“Did she say so?”
“She naturally would be. You can read it; I’ve
got the letter downstairs.... Who broke the
gramophone? I hope you weren’t anywhere round
when it happened: these things are always remembered.
Were the Raltes there? Did they look pretty?
I wonder, really, at their mother allowing them; she
professes to have them in such control. However,
I dare say this will be the last of these dances.”
“Oh, why?”
“If you had heard what we heard at the Trents’....
There was a man there from Kerry. He
really made us feel quite uncomfortable. Though,
as your uncle said afterwards, one knows what
the Trents’ friends are: everything happens to
them. However— Were the Vermonts there?
She would be quite in her element. And Mr. Armstrong?
I have heard he and Livvy were seen in
Cork together at the Imperial, by Mrs. Foxe-O’Connor.
And the young man who was here to
lunch, who talked so much ... in the armoured
car ... oh—Lesworth?”
“Yes, he was there.”
“I am surprised at them all having time,” said
Lady Naylor. “However, if they danced more
and interfered less, I dare say there would be less
trouble in the country. It appears that in Kerry
...” Her voice became colder with inattention
and dwindled away. Lois was certain she eyed the
pink blotter. This zigzag approach to Gerald,
this ultimate vagueness, were sinister. Lady Naylor,
after some moments of odd and oppressive
silence, observed that the sweet-peas were dying.
“The water must be unhealthy, it’s going green.
In fact, all the flowers need doing. Perhaps after
tea— How would you like to go to a school of
art?”
“Marvellous,” said Lois after reflection.
“Francie was very much struck by your drawings.
And Marda said you certainly needed an interest.”
“Oh. Was she discussing me?”
“We were all saying that girls needed interests
and I thought she seemed to agree particularly.
She has not made much of her life, so far—though
of course if she marries Leslie—and I’ve always
thought that music or drawing, or writing a little,
or organization of some kind—”
“Did Marda say what she thought of my drawings?”
“She seemed to think they were nice.... A
quarter to five!” exclaimed Lady Naylor reproachfully.
“The tea will be cold.... You look
sleepy, Lois. Did you hear the Montmorencys are
going to build a bungalow?”
“Here?”
“Don’t be silly— Besides, according to that
friend of the Trents, it would be blown up or burnt
in a month or two. Certainly,” added Lady Naylor,
looking out at the sky, “I call this a tiring day.”
She got up with a sigh.
Later that evening Lois, half-way up to the garden
with scissors and basket, overtook Mr. Montmorency
walking all by himself up the shrubbery
path. Pulling leaves from the laurels he shredded
them carefully.
“I hear,” he said, as she came up alongside, “you
are taking up German?”
“Unless Italian might be more practical....
I hear you are going to build a bungalow?”
“Oh, I don’t know; that is chiefly Francie’s
idea.” They walked in silence, she dragging her
basket against the laurels. They had not been
alone since the drive from Mount Isabel. She
remembered how once she had hoped so much, and
how he had been infinitely disobliging. Now she
had a tenderness for him, devoid of attraction, as
though they had been a couple of widows.
“No stairs would be nice.”
“But it would be certain to have other disadvantages.”
“Apparently,” she said with effrontery, “Marda
arrived quite safely.”
“It should be a surprise to us all,” said Hugo,
sarcastic, “that she has not fallen out of the train.
Even she cannot think of anything better to say to a
hostess. And the information, I always feel certain,
leaves hostesses cold. Once one is clear of
their gates, interest ends with responsibility.”
“And she says Kent is dull.”
“I cannot believe she finds it so.”
“She is frightfully philosophic. Perhaps she was
dull here.” (She thought: “Even now, shall we
never be natural?”)
“Have you seen her letter?”
“No ... have you?”
“No, your aunt has lost it.”
He pushed open the door, then followed her into
the garden which, deep in its walls, seemed impossibly
large, for one could not see to the end of it:
it was crossed by espaliers and crowded with apple-trees.
Down the borders, the September yellow
and scarlets were metallic in unsunny light. Dahlias,
orange and wine-coloured, blazed and gloomed.
He turned down one path, she kept to the other;
they silently parted. Here she had come with
Marda—never with Gerald—they had sat on the
green seat, pressed blisters out of the paint and
spat out their plum-stones into the box border
opposite. Entered to-day, the usual breath of the
garden was cold to her face. The branches were
quiet as though in anxiety, the flowers appeared to
be clamouring vainly, forgotten. Coming to the
hedge of sweet-peas she began at the purple end,
diligently. “Though myself,” she could not help
saying, “I do not care for purple sweet-peas.”
When she reached up to the top of the hedge her
sleeves fell back from her arms and she thought of
Gerald. She felt him looking at her through the
thinning stems. The sweet-peas were practically
over, and indeed she was glad, she thought, snipping
and tugging with blunt garden scissors. In
yesterday’s dusk the Square with its flitter of leaves
had been all autumnal; smoke was blue in the air
and, later, the dark where they kissed had a sharp
intimation of autumn. She loved in autumn a
stronger, more shadowy keen spring, sweet shocks
of good-bye, transition. Summer meanwhile stayed
on inside these walls, forgotten.
The fact was, that though one determined to-night
to sit under the lamp and learn verbs, her
Italian or German would not dispose of last night,
which remained, like the tear in her green tulle
dress, to be dealt with practically. After an
anxious glance at the possible, a pain so sharp that
it seemed her own forbade recantation. It was inevitable
that she should marry Gerald. Mrs. Montmorency
at least—she thought with relief as she
came to the red sweet-peas—would be infinitely
sympathetic and pleased. The unbelievable future
became fixed as the past under the flutter and
settling down of a flock of comments, which, as
she turned in imagination back to the house and
steps and saw lips forming themselves in unconscious
readiness, seemed already uttered. And as
Mr. Montmorency came up a path at an angle, with
the two garden kittens toppling after him, she
was surprised he did not repeat: “Well, I hope of
course that you may be happy. And decision of
any kind is an excellent thing in your mother’s
daughter.”
Instead, he came to the other side of the hedge
and, picking off some bleaching tendrils, observed
that the sweet-peas would soon be over. The house
flowers must keep her busy, he added. And taking
out his pocket-knife he cut three sweet-peas, with
precision. Having made this gesture of sympathy,
he continued to move with her down his side of the
hedge.
“It is extraordinary,” said Lois. “I feel as if I
had been away for a week.”
“Yet you find us going on much the same?”
He looked at her through the stems ironically but
without intelligence. And she could not try to
explain the magnetism they all exercised by their
being static. Or how, after every return—or
awakening, even, from sleep or preoccupation—she
and those home surroundings still further
penetrated each other mutually in the discovery of
a lack.
XX
LADY NAYLOR, who wished for a clear
steady light these lengthening evenings,
saw to the lamps personally. In big yellow
gloves she accurately trimmed the wicks, between
the morning’s head-lines and a thorough talk with
the cook. But the smell of oil was repugnant to
her and now she said with some sharpness:
“You have no conception of love— You are
in my light.”
Lois moved from the lamp-room window. “I
really have,” she said, “really.”
“Nonsense,” her aunt said, looking round for a
rag. Lois began to slide a matchbox about, and
her aunt, taking the matches away mechanically,
thought how hard it was that a woman like this, who
could bring the matter on to an intellectual plane at
once, should have to do lamps at all. Anna Partridge,
whose brain was all shreddy with rabbit-combing
and raffia, had had electric light for years,
just from living in England; even the Trents talked
of harnessing their waterfall.
“When I was your age I never thought of
marriage at all. I didn’t intend to marry. I
remember, when I was nineteen I was reading
Schiller.”
“I don’t think about marriage, I ...”
“Then you can have no conception ...”
“I read,” said Lois, with dignity.
“Girls nowadays do nothing but lend each other
these biological books. I was intensely interested
in art.”
“But, Aunt Myra, young men are quite usual.”
“It all comes of dancing and all this excitement.”
“But Gerald is not excitable; he was in love with
me the other day before lunch.”
“He was half asleep,” said Lady Naylor. “At
the best of times he has not much conversation.
Of course, I rate brains so highly; perhaps I am
wrong. But remember, you cannot hope to be
always in love, and then ...”
“But you said I had no conception ...”
“There you are, in my light again.”
Lois moved further away from the window. She
wished she had not started this explanation. She
had felt, somehow, that it should be less embarrassing
in the lamp-room. She thought of Gerald’s
unquestioning shoulder, where she would lean her
head. “But I can’t explain,” she said; “I never
heard of a girl being asked to explain. I always
thought ...”
“Real feeling explains itself,” said Lady Naylor
and polished some oil off the base of a lamp triumphantly.
“But if he comes to tea ...”
“Oh, we cannot help that, of course.”
“But if he spoke to Uncle Richard ...”
“Your uncle would be very much worried.
Really, Lois, I do think you might be more sensible
and considerate.”
Lois saw this point of view only too perfectly.
She wrinkled her forehead. She did not want to
be hard on her Uncle Richard and she could not
help sympathizing with Aunt Myra, who had
so much to organize as it was. Feeling did seem
to her out of proportion with life, and that this
disproportion should be so evident generally, that
her aunt should think she was making an irrelevant
fuss, strongly discouraged her. But she reassembled
herself; she had been led to understand
that love ...
“But surely love ...”
“You have no conception of love,” repeated Lady
Naylor, and thought again of electric light in
Bedfordshire.
“But shall I never do anything?”
“Go to a school of art.”
“Where?”
“It could be arranged.”
“But I don’t think I really draw well.”
“That is no reason why you should marry.”
It was, of course, no reason; acknowledging
this, and seeing light from the barred window fall
so coldly on the oilcloth top of the lamp-table,
Lois felt quite at a standstill.
“However ...” said Lady Naylor. She looked
with her brilliant eyes dubiously, almost shyly, at
the door behind Lois’s head. She swept the rags
and the lamp scissors into a drawer, shut the drawer
on their malodour, and pulled off her gloves,
sighing. She saw life, perhaps, as a shuffle of setting
to partners, then a drawn-out, coupled but somehow
solitary curtsying, to him, the other, the rest of the
eight. “However ...” she said. And the qualification
committed herself and her niece, a shade
alarmingly. Lois knew that Gerald might come
to tea.
“You do see,” said Lois, and stared at her aunt’s
ringed hands which reappeared from the gloves,
“that I didn’t want to be clandestine?”
“Oh, of course you were quite right,” said Lady
Naylor without enthusiasm. She went down to
talk to the cook.
Kathleen, the cook, who resembled her mistress
in personality so closely that their relation was an
affair of balance, who had more penetration than
Lady Naylor and was equally dominant, inferred
much of the situation from her mistress’s manner.
Herself, she had felt this was bound to occur. For
an hour or so, they had countered each other amiably
in the lime-washed gloom of the kitchen, over a basin
of green-pea soup. Lady Naylor announced with
unusual deprecation, there would be an officer
coming over to tea. Kathleen, refolding her hands
royally, asked, would she slap up a sally-lunn? On
the whole, Lady Naylor thought drop-cakes. Kathleen
immediately placed the officer. Strolling down
the yard in the course of the afternoon to execute a
couple of chickens, she watched dispassionately from
under the chestnuts Gerald crouch on his motor-bicycle
up the avenue. Lois, standing about with
the dogs, went down to meet him. For tea, Kathleen
sent up an unaccountable iced cake, ironically
festive.
Francie was glad Mr. Lesworth was coming to
tea. For the day strained with ominousness, as
though it were going to burst. Hugo, pacing
about on the avenues with The Conquest of Mexico
under his arm, disparaged repose. “By the way,”
he said once, coming up, “if you should be happening
to write to Marda Norton ...”
“Oh, but I shan’t be; not till I send her our
little present. Besides, I have nothing to say.”
“She might write to you about the eau-de-Cologne.”
“Oh no, she thanked me.”
“There was a point I wanted to clear, about
Metternich—you remember that argument? I’ve
just come on a book—I suppose I had better write
myself.”
“But no one knows her address; Myra lost the
letter.”
“Ah yes, of course.... That settles it.” He
smiled—one would have said with relief. Francie,
looking down in despair at her blouse as he walked
away, saw that the jabot was crumpled. She could
not understand how a woman who travelled with
suitcases could look as smooth as Marda. But then,
she was all outlines: detail seemed to collect and
obtrude in the middle of Francie. She went up to
change, glad that Gerald was coming, sounding
with some attention the silence under the avenue
trees. For the fact was, life attenuated to the
snapping-point; in Gerald’s continuity, in Lois’s,
she must invest her own.
Gerald propped up his motor-bicycle, looked up
carefully at the closed windows—in one, from behind
a blot of light, Francie was nodding—and said that
he should not really have come. Troops had been
fired on coming back into Clonmore, near that level-crossing.
The situation was tightening; there was
a lot to do.
“Oh. Then it is a pity you came,” said Lois.
Gerald said nothing; his ears faintly coloured.
“Clonmore!” said Lois with indignation, and
thought of the little friendly town with its tennis club.
“So it happened,” said Gerald, looking at her.
“It might have been anywhere else.” He whistled
and greeted the dogs, her dogs.
“Then ... it was dangerous coming?”
“Oh no, not to speak of.”
The house so loomed, and stared so darkly and
oddly that he showed a disposition—respectful
rather than timorous—to move away from the front
of it. They walked to the tennis courts and round
one court in a circle. “Lois ...” She veered off
quickly, Laurence was working up there in his
window. Gerald waved, but had no response.
“Doesn’t he concentrate!” he said wistfully.
“I suppose so.... Does Laurence matter?”
“You know you ...”
“Gerald, you are the frightfully concentrated
person, really.”
“But I can’t read.... Where can I ... where
could we—?”
“—Here comes Mr. Montmorency.”
Hugo, coming up to shake hands with Gerald,
said it seemed a long time since they had met. The
young man, by his way of standing and looking
clearly and being positive, strongly connected himself
with Marda. With an unexpected and crooked
stab of nostalgia, Hugo thought of the trees, the
morning mountains, the tinkling and knocking
stream. Of all of her he had kept and had never
had and must try to regain appeared most sharply
the moment of that encounter: irrelevant moment,
when, outside something, he had watched light run
down her hair as she stooped for Gerald to light her
cigarette. The quality of their silence, their separation
after Gerald had left them—pressing on up to
the house to look for Lois—now seemed the very
ground of his closest approach. But he knew how
the scene was perishable, how having drawn up into
itself for life, like a plant, any reality that there was
in him, it would die of his barrenness. Until finally,
by even the same conjunction of mountains and
light and trees, it would not be evoked again.
“No shaving under a hedge this morning?” he
said genially.
“Oh no,” said Gerald, surprised. Why should
there be?
Lois, encouraged to find that by some growth of
womanhood in herself her attitude was already a
wife’s, at once proud and deprecating, stood there
watching Gerald, most grateful for the repose of
this interposition and willing that Mr. Montmorency
should be detained. She knew, from a
glance they both gave her, that she must have been
startled by some sort of consciousness into beauty,
and a particular placidness, a sense of being located,
warmed her surroundings, the smooth lawn and
heavy trees. Balancing, foot behind foot, on a line
of the court faint from rain, she constructed a life
in China—most regimental, alert and pleasantly
surfaced—from Japanese prints she had ignored
in shops, an idea of odd, angular archways and
some strips of vertical writing. He must no doubt
some day be a captain, and “captain’s lady” had a
ballad-like cadence. She almost took Gerald’s arm.
“You find us diminished,” said Hugo, “and a
good deal quieter. Miss Norton has gone.”
“Oh?”
“Marda,” she hastily prompted.
“She was awfully nice and amusing,” said Gerald,
beaming out like the sun from behind a moment’s
perplexity. “I’d have loved to have met her again.”
She explained to him afterwards, taking him off
through the shrubberies, how things were at present
with Mr. Montmorency: he was a ruined man.
Gerald went rigid, something shut like a door on his
sensibilities—the thing reeked of adultery. He
produced an appalled silence. But about Lois’s
mother, he brought out finally, hadn’t one heard he
had once been ...?
“But a thing can’t be final,” said Lois. “Not
while one’s alive.”
Was this what she read? “But there’s Mrs.
Montmorency....” It seemed fixed here, the
Montmorencys’ conjointness, among the stately
furniture and long mild meals—earth to Lois’s
roots.
“But one can’t arrange oneself; one doesn’t altogether
live from inside: Marda just happened.”
“And did she ...?” cried Gerald, appalled.
Above this extraordinary undercurrent, it seemed
to him his Lois was poised too perfectly.
Lois, in pink linen, perfectly sophisticated and
cool, said: “No. She was just regretful. Also,
she is engaged, you see.”
“Is she? I should never have thought ...”
“... Her engaged? Well, how ought she to
look? Like a kind of hen bird, all dim?”
“She was all herself. Doesn’t love kind of
finish people off ... with something that isn’t them,
in a way you can feel?”
She understood him, but did not know how to
agree. What must one then be for him? She was
shy of his uncomprehension of a particular notion
of living she seemed only now to have formed. Did
she give out an untrue ring to his touch? Where
was the flaw? Or was Gerald, sublimely, the
instrument of some large imposture?
“Complete—you mean finished?... Perhaps
she is not really in love.”
“But surely she isn’t that sort ... she wouldn’t
just marry?”
“I don’t think what Marda does matters; she
simply is.”
He looked desperate suddenly, as though she were
behind bars. “Look here, no one matters. Don’t
let’s talk ... I mean ... don’t let’s talk. Lois,
there’s so little time now, I’m desperate. I don’t
see when I am going to see you, ever. Lois, this
miserable waiting; even happiness never lets one
alone. When shall we be quiet?”
“But, Gerald, we’re quite young.”
“I want nothing to happen but you. You are
everything. I want so much of you.”
She stood, perplexed, at the edge of the path; he
kissed her with frightened violence. The laurels
creaked as, in his arms, she bent back into them.
His singleness bore, confusing, upon her panic of
thoughts, her physical apprehension of him was
confused by the slipping, cold leaves. Her little
sighs elated then alarmed him.
“What’s the matter?” he said, his lips close to her
face.
“I don’t like the smell of the laurels. Let’s come
out of here.” They went back, she put up anxious
hands and asked him about her hair. “Is it twiggy
and awful?” “Lovely.” She wished that he were
a woman. As they approached the steps where her
aunt and uncle and Francie composed an abstracted
group, she told him: “Aunt Myra wants me to go
to a school of art.”
“Oh ... Can you draw?”
“Gerald ...!”
“Darling, I’ve never seen them. How could I
know?”
Lady Naylor exclaimed how delightful it was that
Gerald had come over. Now they would hear some
real, real news, she said: they always relied on
Gerald. Sir Richard, taking his pince-nez off in
amazement, could hardly believe it was Gerald
again; he still thought subalterns came in rotation.
Surely, he said candidly, it was yesterday they had
had that interesting talk about the Militia? Gerald
was given a chair of such voluptuous depth that his
chin came barely above the edge of the tea-table.
They congratulated him on the Rolfes’ dance. In
fact, they united to carry off the situation with such
brilliance that Gerald might well have been a dun
or a tax-collector. Then, at a moment when talk
seemed precarious and Marda obtrusively absent
and Lady Naylor sat eyeing Lois’s hair, the Trents
arrived unexpectedly. They brought over another
friend, this time from County Clare, to whom still
more had happened. Gerald went into joyous
eclipse; the Danielstown party sat breathless—hardly
a chair creaked—the Trents looked at their
friend complacently while the Trents’ friend curdled
the tea in one’s mouth with tales of assault and cattle-driving.
“Well, I suppose we’ve a certain amount to be
thankful for,” smiled Mrs. Archie Trent as their
friend, having been put through his hoops, settled
down to tea. And she told Lois that she was
looking remarkably well, and they hoped they would
see her out with the Ballymoyles this winter. And
meanwhile, what about cubbing?
“Lois is going to a school of art,” said Lady
Naylor.
“That seems a pity,” said Mrs. Trent.
The friend, finishing his tea, said all the Irish art
schools ought to be searched. He wouldn’t say
for certain, but he had a pretty shrewd suspicion
what you would find there. If it came to that, he
said, casts were hollow and you could keep a good
deal inside the Venus of Milo. Sir Richard looked
vaguely offended.
“I should go to the Slade,” said Lois.
“Oh,” said Mrs. Archie Trent, “not Rome, I
suppose? Well I shouldn’t do anything of that
sort in a hurry.”
“Art is long,” said Laurence, who liked conversation
of this sort. The Trents’ friend asked
him how he liked Cambridge; he himself had a
nephew who hoped soon to be going up. Laurence
said he had heard that Cambridge was very
nice.
The Trents’ friend took Gerald aside after tea,
to explain to him where the Army was going wrong.
Mrs. Trent at once drew closer up to the teapot and
said, in a loud voice of confidence, she had heard
Livvy Thompson was really engaged to that young
Armstrong. “Nonsense,” said Lady Naylor.
“But they were seen in Cork having tea, and the
aunt denies it too vigorously. After all, it would
be something for the Thompsons.”
Lois, who was unfortunate, blushed; both ladies
looked hard at her. “To begin with,” declared
Lady Naylor, “these young men are not at all
marriageable. Besides, to tell you the truth ...”
“But I don’t see what else the girls are to do. I
mean, look at the Hartigans.”
“There’s a future for girls nowadays outside
marriage,” said Lady Naylor inspiringly. “Careers—how
I should have loved one. One reads so
much about ...” She was an advanced woman:
Mrs. Trent, who did not read, paused in respect but
preserved an honest, bright-pink expression of
incredulity. She pictured those indoor women
with clutched little bags getting hurriedly into the
Dublin trams. It was no life. Her friend seemed,
moreover, unwisely persistent in encouraging art
for Lois: this, for young girls, often resulted in
worse than spinsterhood. “All the same,” she said,
returning, “Livvy seems set on the young man.
And she has a great deal of character.”
“Well, if I were her aunt and her father, I’d never
hear of it.”
“Dear me,” cried Mrs. Trent, kicking the table
cheerfully, “we’ve made Lois blush at the very
idea.”
“Lois knows better,” said Lady Naylor. And
she gave Lois one of her rarest, most charming,
direct and personal glances.
And indeed what a friend, thought Lois, going
out to the steps to escape them all, if one had only
just met, might Aunt Myra be.
XXI
A CLOUD slid over the sun; the stream went
opaque as tortoise-shell. Then, startling
Hugo, the water suddenly flushed with
light as the cloud moved east. Minnows, disturbed
like thoughts, darted shadowy over the clear
yellow stare of the stones. He dipped his stick in
the water, then, drawing it out, thoughtfully looked
at the shining end. At this point: eighteen inches;
the stream, divided in two deep channels by the
island of turf where he stood, went hurrying to the
Darra. In its fold of the Darra valley, the high
white mill would remain sardonic. He was swept
by an irresistible anger back to that affair of the
pistol. For Marda had written: her hand had
healed; no one had asked any questions or wondered,
she said.
She had written to Lois, sending Hugo this
message. It had pleased both the girls to underline
his exclusion. She wrote also, Leslie had given
her a dog—a correct dog, Lois expected, like
all that was best in English country house life.
Marda could not think what to do with the
dog till she married; she would have to leave it
in Kent.... And what else did Marda say,
Francie had wanted to know. But Lois, who
seemed to have swallowed the letter, postmark
and all, could not remember. Later, she did seek
out Hugo and offer to show him.... But he had
put up surprise. “Oh? Was there any particular—?”
No, he did not think on the whole
he would trouble her.... Would the child see,
he wondered, that the little oblique snub was not
intended to stop at her, but to go past? His look
now fell empty, reflective, on the tawny glass
sliding water.
The child, having seen, went upstairs to describe
his behaviour to Marda. Her unreticence was
immoderate, though she was sensitive for him.
She wrote scrupulously, with an affect of hardness.
“He is terrible, and, as the end of everything,
they are to build a bungalow. She has it all her
own way now; I don’t know if he still even brushes
her hair. Since you went, it has been the same
time all day: three o’clock, after a long lunch. We
all talk about my future (by common consent I am
about nine now, very distracting and sunny; they
like to have me about). It is to be a school of art,
certainly.—Why did you never tell them I couldn’t
draw?—But we can’t decide where. London, in
view of my age, is supposed to be too large. In
Dublin, a man who came to tea yesterday said there
might be high explosives inside all the casts with
capacious figures. In Cork I might pick up an
accent, and Paris they will not hear of—my wretched
virtue. But as a matter of fact, I have no future,
in their sense. I have promised to marry Gerald.”
Here she paused, for from now on it was all
obscure ahead of her. Reading back, she was
surprised at the woman she was. She took this
merciless penetration for maturity’s. But when
she looked for Gerald there seemed too much of
him. He was a wood in which she counted from
tree to tree—all hers—and knew the boundary wall
right round. But how to measure this unaccountable
darkness between the trees, this living silence?
So she turned back to Mr. Montmorency, adding
a paragraph. He had, this morning, snubbed her.
She would have been surprised to have seen him,
at this same moment, step across to the island and
stand there rootedly. And he, his whereabouts
even so much as guessed at, would have been quite
at her mercy. For to have followed the stream to
this loneliest reach, beyond the plantation wall,
where the meadow’s hedge trailed unknown blackberries
over the water, was not to have walked, to
have strolled even, but to have betrayed oneself in
an emotional kind of straying. Further down,
stepping-stones had been displaced by last winter’s
flood, there was a ruined cottage; nobody came
here. Even Lois had given up, since her eighteenth
birthday, coming to lie on her stomach
along the bank, weep out a bottomless despair at
nothing and look at herself in the stream. And
this wildness within the demesne boundaries, within
sound of the farmyard bell, had a particular
desolation.
Hugo was pleased with the place; here he seemed
to have stepped through into some kind of nonexistence.
And here, divorced equally from fact
and from probability, he set up a stage for himself:
the hall’s half-light. Marda’s hand is on the wide
scrolled curve of the baluster rail: he touches her
still and electric hand with the deliberation of
certainty, all the senses running into his touch.
She stares recognition fixedly, darkly back....
For though in actuality she had had only one mood
for him—cool and equivocal—he, now frantic with
this power disconnected from life, could command
her whole range imaginatively: her very features
became his actors. And if this were not love ...
He was pleased with the place. They must all,
he expected, be looking for him: it produced the
faintest vibration behind the solitude. This morning,
Myra was driving into Clonmore to lunch with
the Boatleys; she had asked him to come, he had
said he would see. He had intended by this “Good
God, no,” and if she were fool enough to interpret
it otherwise there was a rightness about her delay
in starting. Francie would certainly go; she was
painfully fascinated by military society. She would
now be standing out on the steps, grey net veil
strained elegantly over the tip of her nose, looking
at her gloves in despair, persisting: “He must be
somewhere!”
“How many of us do they really expect?” said
Francie at last, getting into the car disconsolate.
Lady Naylor had not the slightest idea. “But
they are accustomed to Ireland. She was a Vere
Scott. And they know that I usually fill the
car.”
“You’re not taking Lois?”
“Lois goes into Clonmore quite enough,” replied
Lady Naylor.
For Lady Naylor had further reasons for going
into Clonmore. She had an assignation with
Gerald at half-past three, in Mrs. Fogarty’s drawing-room.
Fridays were Club days, Mrs. Fogarty
would be “up at the tennis,” and her drawing-room,
disembarrassed for once of her large personality,
remained at the disposition of friends. Lady
Naylor, though she deplored Mrs. Fogarty’s taste
in beads, her husband, her stays—which stuck out
half-way up her back in a frill—and her too overflowing
maternity, had fallen into the general habit
of using her house as a kind of Ladies’ Club, dropping
in there at all times to leave parcels, wash her
hands or meet friends. And she had the impression,
always, that the maid who admitted her ran upstairs
at once to put Mr. Fogarty under lock and key.
Still, one knew that one’s coming gave pleasure and
gratification: she would enter the little drawing-room,
even when empty, with her queenliness at
its full.
Gerald, questioning but elated, turned up a little
before time, much braced in and polished about the
belt. He had never been given an assignation so
directly. For she had said (this now divinely
probable aunt of his): “I may be at the Fogartys,
resting, about half-past three. If you should be
passing—though of course you may not be and I
do not want to keep you away from the tennis—you
might look in and have a chat. For it has been
too bad to-day, I have hardly seen you. I have
missed our usual talk. There is still so much ...
But I dare say you won’t be passing.” Her look,
a special point to its wide-pupilled eagerness, transposed
this to the imperative. The vigorous arch
of her eyebrows insisted strongly. He, feeling
himself ordered like a taxi—better still, like a
nephew—had flushed with pleasure. Rath-er;
he’d make a point—(would she then call him
Gerald?). “Of course, I may not be there; we may
not even come in; it is all quite uncertain,” said
Lady Naylor.
Riding home, the intoxication of Gerald had
mounted. He guessed that she never rested, rarely
leaned back in a chair, never pushed up her hat
with a sigh or stretched tender feet out, unbuttoning
shoes. She would remain imperious, even in
Oxford Street. So she was contriving for him; a
special tribute.
Lady Naylor, coming in to the Fogartys’ soon
after four, was annoyed to find Gerald before her.
She had now, instead of being discovered, to
manœuvre more or less openly for position. Disregarding
the chair Gerald trundled up with its
load of cushions, she placed herself (unaccountably,
it would have to appear) on the narrow window-seat.
Thus, she conceded no more to the room than
an imposing silhouette of hat and boa, while Gerald,
glancing round pessimistically at the chairs, remaining
with elbow planted among photo-frames on the
mantelpiece, was exposed to her full in the strained
green light coming over the bushes.
“Such a day,” she sighed briskly. “We have
lunched with the Boatleys. What a delightful
Colonel he must be! She, you know, is Irish; a
Vere Scott. We must seem ridiculous to you, over
here, the way we are all related.”
“Topping, I think,” said Gerald.
“Oh, I don’t know! Now you lucky people
seem to have no relations at all; that must feel so
independent.”
“I have dozens.”
“Indeed? All in Surrey?”
“Scattered about.”
“That sounds to me, of course,” remarked Lady
Naylor, pulling her gloves off brightly, “exceedingly
restless. But you all came from Surrey, didn’t
you?”
“More or less,” said Gerald, who was not sure.
The Boatleys had not been sure where he came from,
either; her day so far had been unsatisfactory.
“Now I do hope I’m not keeping you from
smoking?”
She was. He smiled and lighted a cigarette.
“You don’t ...?”
“Oh dear me, no, I am quite old-fashioned.
Now tell me—you know how I hate all this gossip
in a garrison neighbourhood, but there is something
I must set right. What is this nonsense I
hear about Livvy Thompson? You know she’s a
friend of my niece’s and comes a good deal to our
house, and I do feel I ought to refute these stories
about her.”
“Oh?” said Gerald, alarmed. “I had no
idea.”
“Hadn’t you,” said Lady Naylor. “Well, you
are a friend of the young man Mr. Armstrong’s,
so I felt I’d come straight to you. It appears they
were seen in Cork having tea rather intimately and
in consequence there are all sorts of rumours.
Now it doesn’t seem fair to a young girl, at the
beginning of life, having her name coupled.”
“I should have thought,” said Gerald rather
stiffly, “anyone could see Miss Thompson was
entirely straight. And as for Armstrong—
They are engaged, as a matter of fact.”
“Oh, nonsense,” said Lady Naylor pleasantly.
“Oh yes,” he nodded, then with his rather
engaging childishness looked at her under his
lashes. “But they don’t want—”
“To begin with, the Thompsons would never
hear of it. And they would be quite right. Of
course, poor Livvy is motherless—”
“But many people are,” said Gerald, faintly
aggressive. “Lois is.”
“Oh, naturally we should never consider a
marriage like that for Lois. The point would not
even arise. But even for Livvy— And then
think of the young man’s career: these early marriages
ruin careers, and engagements are nearly as
bad. I know Colonel Boatley feels— No, what
you should do, I think, is: have a straight sensible
talk with your friend Mr. Armstrong. I know how
much you young men will take from each other.
I think as a friend you should say to him—”
“But look here—” began Gerald, and paused.
“Look here, Lady Naylor—” He stopped dead
and looked round the room, which was darker
since she had come in: the afternoon was clouding
over. He was disengaging himself with some
anguish of illusions which he had brought here and
which during the first minute or so of their talk had
been fortified. When they came to Surrey, he had
thought she was hoping to meet his mother. Crossing
his legs, he rubbed the side of one shoe on the
other with a slight creak at which she, betraying
her tensity, started. Standing with lowered eyes,
with an air of heaviness and confusion, he noted
this movement, a tremor of light round the edge of
her boa. With unusual calmness and virility he
said:
“As a matter of fact, I love Lois.”
“Oh yes. But I’m afraid, you know, that she
doesn’t love you,” said the aunt equably.
He overruled this without comment, simply by
maintaining his attitude. For all his physical
lightness and vigour, there was a quality in him she
would describe as stodginess. “Then I gather
she’s told you we—”
“Oh, she’s naturally pleased that you like her.
And at her age, with her temperament, of course
it is nice to love anyone.”
“But you’ve just said she doesn’t—”
“Not as I understand love.”
“But so long,” said Gerald, with the particular
urbanity of an approach to rudeness, “so long as
she and I both mean the same thing.”
“But you don’t,” said his friend in her kind,
social voice. “That is what I am trying to make
you see. With her temperament—”
“I haven’t noticed her temperament,” said
Gerald loyally, as if a temperament were a hump.
“Now that alone,” exclaimed Lady Naylor,
waving her gloves in a rapid gesticulation, “would
make a marriage quite fatal.... Mr. Lesworth,
I don’t want to have to imagine you miserable. I
have no sons of my own, you know, and Laurence
being so intellectual— And there is another
thing ...” She paused, and with unusual nervousness,
with a movement almost of Francie’s,
touched her boa, her jabot, two carnations pinned
in the lace. She had now to tilt straight at indecency.
There was this question of money—a subject the
English made free with, as free with as what was
below their diaphragms, but from which her whole
modesty shrank. “You may think me dreadful,”
she said, “but there are things in life one must face.
After all, I am Lois’s aunt....”
Gerald, blushing, stood agonized to attention.
“There is money,” she brought out at last. “I
mean, you haven’t any, have you? Of course, I
don’t see why you should have. But two people
must live, though it’s all rather sordid. However,
this need not arise. But I just want to show
you—”
“I know she’s got a beautiful home,” he said
glumly.
“However ... You see, it’s impossible every
way. But first and last, she does not love you.”
He was forced into the position which he would
have described to a friend as bloody, of asserting
she did. “Though I cannot think why.”
“Oh, but so many girls would!” she cried
earnestly. “But for Lois I do think—we all think—a
school of art. She cares for her drawing
intensely.”
“She never speaks of it.”
“Ah, that just shows ... Lack of sympathy!”
said the aunt with mournful complacency. “And
it isn’t simply your age; it would be the same thing
if you were a captain or even a major. Now I do
think you ought to be sensible. It can all pass off
so quietly. Nobody knows except me. Now what
I suggest—”
“—She might have told me she’d told you!”
He stared round the changed room bitterly.
“That was just what I didn’t encourage, to tell
you the truth. Oh, the child was most honest.
But I thought you and I should approach this quite
fresh and unprejudiced.”
“Did we have to?”
“Oh, Mr. Lesworth!” she cried, disconcerted.
She resumed, firmly but with inspiration, something
between a hospital nurse and a prophetess: “The
less talk, the less indirect discussion round and
about things, the better, I always think.”
While she considered her gloves and with
gathering satisfaction prepared to put one of them
on, he stood half-turned away from her, stubborn but
indecisive. An unusual pendulum swung in him,
he was ruined—resolute—ruined. He was dark
with perplexed anger, from which his invincible
“niceness” stood, in deprecation, aside. She blasphemed,
and yet he had to admire her four-square
propriety, her sound sense, the price she set on his
Lois. And love, meanwhile, did not so much lie
bleeding as sit back stunned, bruised, a little craven
from shock. Gerald drew in his chin, swallowed,
put a finger inside his collar as though to loosen it.
“Then I understand you don’t like this: you’re
going to stop it?”
“—Now, my dear Mr. Lesworth, do think:
would I ever ‘stop’ anything?”
“—You’re going to stop it because I’m too young
and too poor and not ‘county’ enough—or whatever
I ought to be?”
“You have entirely misunderstood me,” cried
Lady Naylor, hurt.
“You don’t have to tell me I’m not good enough:
that’s what I’ve battered my head against ever
since—”
“We all think you’re charming—the Montmorencys,
every one! You know we’re delighted
to see you—”
“Oh, I’m all right for tennis,” said Gerald
without rancour.
“There is no one I’d rather—as far as that
goes—” began Lady Naylor warmly.
“You feel it’s up to you to stop it,” he summed
up. “And I can see that from your point of view
you’re quite right. But there are some things
you can’t stop. God knows, I’ve got little enough
for Lois, and she ought to have everything, straight
off, now. But I swear I’ll see that she gets it. I’ll
give up the Army, anything. I know I’m going to
work things out. If it were only what I want—
But she loves me—I dare say she’s pretty mad—but
she does love me; I’ve looked at her eyes, I
know. If she hadn’t seemed—if I hadn’t felt—if
it hadn’t been just the only thing for us both, I’d
never have said a word—I swear—I’d have died
sooner.”
“But she agrees with every one,” said Lady
Naylor, taking off the glove again in despair.
“She is extremely keen to go to this school of art.”
“Where?” he said violently.
“Some good school.”
“Do you expect me not to trust her?”
“I should have a straightforward, sensible
talk.”
“You’re not going to stop me seeing her?”
“I don’t know what sort of girls’ mothers and
aunts you’re accustomed to,” she said, nettled,
“but how could you expect me to do such a preposterous
thing? It would be not only unkind
but exceedingly foolish. To begin with, she is
not my own niece at all. It would be for her uncle
to decide. But Sir Richard is very easily worried:
I particularly do not wish— You know we are
always delighted to see you at any time ...”
She paused. “It’s most awfully kind of you,”
said he, by reflex action.
“In these days of frank unsentimental friendship
between young people, I do not see why you two
should not have a perfectly friendly, sensible talk.
Of course there must be no ... I mean, I know
I can trust you ... I mean, you do quite understand
you are not engaged, and not being engaged
there can be no question of—?”
“I promise I won’t kiss her.”
Lady Naylor was much embarrassed. She
laughed impersonally and arranged her boa. She
expressed some envy of this generation, its frank
friendships.
“I don’t think I am very modern,” said Gerald
flatly.
“Now Laurence is too modern: he does not seem
to care about girls at all.... For the present,
I’d leave love out of the question—”
“But I thought that was the question!”
A shadow went past the window. “Here comes
Mrs. Montmorency,” said Gerald. And he
touched his moustache and blinked and looked
round, wondering which chair to offer.
“That is too bad! I sent her up to the Rectory.”
“Perhaps they were out.”
“I told her to wait; there would be plenty to read
in the drawing-room— Well, you do understand,
don’t you?”
“I’m afraid I—”
Francie was shown in. “Oh!” she cried, “what
a lot of cushions! Kittens! Fancy sitting on
them, I should feel like a cannibal. No, I don’t
mean— Mr. Lesworth! Isn’t this nice! Are
those photographs of your regiment? I had no
idea there were so many officers.... Myra, I
remembered a little something I had to get at the
chemist’s, so I thought I’d call in here and save you
that climb up the hill. They were all out.”
“Well, that was very sweet of you, Francie,” said
Lady Naylor.
“Oh, how patriotic!” cried Francie, knocking
two cushions covered with Union Jacks off the
sofa. “She’s a Catholic, isn’t she? Oh, Mr.
Lesworth, don’t bother; I’m so clumsy.... I had
no idea we were going to meet you. Isn’t it a pity
now that we didn’t bring Lois? Myra, isn’t it too
bad Lois didn’t come too.”
“Yes, it does seem a pity,” said Lady Naylor.
Still faintly regretful she got up, looked at herself
in a mirror, arranged her boa and pulled down the
brim of her hat. Then she shook hands with
Gerald warmly, saying how much she had enjoyed
their talk.
XXII
“I SHALL never forget,” continued Francie,
through the open dressing-room door, “the
way he picked up those cushions.”
“Which?” said Hugo, searching irritably among
his collars. The feudal system was weak at some
points, he reflected—this Danielstown laundry.
The laundress’s father had helped to defend the
house in the troubled ’sixties. Nostalgic, he thought
of these neat democratic blue vans labelled “hygienic”
that called on Mondays. “Well really,” said
he, “I may just as well go to bed. I haven’t a
collar left fit to dine in.... Which cushions?”
“Oh, horrors. But then they say the Fogartys
are so kind.—Never mind, Hugo; Richard’s and
Laurence’s collars are just the same.—You know
how alive he is generally: well, that was all gone.
It was like seeing a waterfall stand still. You
know, Hugo, it may be horrid, but I don’t trust
Myra sometimes. She says things aren’t, and
then she turns and makes these curious little dabs
at them. She dislikes the Clonmore rectory people,
she says they are breath-y, she knows I don’t know
them and yet she insisted on my going up. And
when I came down again she was charming; I
knew I must have annoyed her.”
“My dear Francie, life is too short for all this.”
(Though that was not the matter with life, really:
life was too long.) Hugo frowned, chin up in front
of his glass. “It’s a good thing the evenings are
drawing in,” he said, with reference to his collar.
“Now what I should have said ...” resumed
Francie, “though ideally, really, I shouldn’t have
said anything....”
“Talking of evenings,” said Hugo, “where do
we go next? We’ve got to fit in the Fitzgeralds
before October. Oughtn’t you to be writing to
somebody? And oh, Francie, you might post
some of these collars to the Terenure laundry, if
you can get the parcel out of the house quietly.”
“I shall miss here,” sighed Francie, looking out
at the trees.
“You miss everywhere.” They both thought
of the bungalow which, an eternal present for
them, would be never able to shine in retrospect.
Throughout dinner, Francie was distraite. She
was making out in her mind a little letter to Gerald.
But, of course, that would never do.
“Hullo!” said Laurence, earlier, looking at the
letters put out for next morning’s post on the hall
table. “Lois has written to Marda. I thought
no one knew her address.”
“She heard from Marda this morning,” explained
his uncle, bending to study the envelope with
melancholy interest. “I understand that it was
about a dog. I shall be relieved when Marda is
married. I wonder will the young man be able
to look after luggage.”
“I ran into Mr. Lesworth this afternoon,” Lady
Naylor told Lois. “He came into the Fogartys’
while I was resting there. Really, she keeps quite a
home for those young men—though nothing would
ever take the gloss off those cushions. He seemed
very cheerful, he was on his way up to the tennis.”
“He never goes to the tennis on Club days.”
“Oh, well, he seemed to be on his way up to
the tennis. He told me of that young Armstrong’s
engagement to Livvy Thompson. It
seems quite a fait accompli, though secret, of course.
How things do get round in a garrison town!
You knew, I suppose?”
“Well, Livvy did tell me.”
“What a bother for you!” said Lady Naylor.
“It is a comfort to have outgrown one’s friends’
engagements. I suppose you couldn’t very well
tell her it was preposterous?”
“Well, I ...”
“Mr. Lesworth thought it a pity, in view of the
young man’s future. He expects Mr. Armstrong
will not stand well over this with their Colonel at
all. I think he can’t understand his friends not
being keener on his career. I suppose it will end
by their just going out to one of those coffee or
orange places in Africa. But, of course, Livvy is
used to a dull life.”
“But I don’t see ...”
“And there isn’t much else for her. I can’t see
poor Livvy at a school of art, though she might
typewrite.”
“She would do for a model,” said Laurence, who
had been listening with interest to this conversation
from his side of the table. “They should be
either voluminous or very spiky.”
At this point, the candles were brought in—Lady
Naylor had been delayed in Clonmore, they
were dining late. The sharp flames shivered, every
one blinked; the dahlias became theatrical.
“Autumn,” pronounced Sir Richard. “There
should be less of this ambushing and skirmishing
and hey-fidaddling now that the days are drawing in.”
“But as an English friend of mine pointed out,”
said Hugo, “this Irish fighting is not cricket.”
Laurence maintained that this way of fighting was
consistent, efficient and very natural. Why, he
asked, be high-toned about a war?
“Oh dear,” said Francie, “you sound just like
a pacifist!”
“What else did Gerald say?” Lois wanted to know.
“I really cannot remember,” said Lady Naylor; “he
was as pleasant as ever, but, of course, not original.
He seemed in a hurry to be getting up to the tennis.”
Lois, dissatisfied, blinked gloomily in the candlelight.
About half-past ten, Francie—having been taken
up to her room by Myra, with a suggestion of
having been put away for the night—crept out
again to the ante-room, listening. Her candlestick,
wobbling with indecision, brushed the ceiling
with shadows. Wires twanged where some cattle
rubbed on a fence in the damp darkness. Francie
went across and tapped on Lois’s door.
Lois turned in alarm from the dark window
where she stood holding her elbows, not quite
thinking. Her heart thumped as the crack of the
door widened, letting in foreign light. “Damn,”
she thought with annoyance. She had been up
here for more than an hour and had not begun
to undress. To look more natural she undid her
frock and stepped quickly out of it.
Mrs. Montmorency, yellow under the chin,
appeared deprecatingly. She had just thought, she
said, of a little chat. She looked round hopelessly,
she could not think where to put down her candle.
This decided—a little table presented itself—her
difficulties seemed to be over. She said at once:
“The young man, Lois, seems so unhappy.”
“But we’re engaged,” said Lois, tying her
dressing-gown firmly round her hips.
“Oh ... Are you certain? Because ...”
“What did he say?” said Lois, at once defensive.
“My dear, I was up at the rectory. I am sure
your aunt meant everything for the best.”
Lois went to the glass and took down her hair
distractedly. Shaking it over her face she said,
muffled: “You mean she has interfered?”
“Well, I wouldn’t say she’d done that. But it
seems a pity ...”
“Really,” cried Lois, glad of the hair because
her anger did sound to herself faintly academic,
“she is as designing as ... a cardinal.”
“As I said to Hugo, you have enough sense,
you are so modern ... and after all you will only
be young once.”
“Oh. Were you all there?”
“My dear, I tell you, I was up at the rectory.
But from the way he picked up the cushions ...
I can’t bear lives to go wrong.”
This came out so vehemently, with such an
effect of passion that Lois, surprised, said: “Neither
can I, really.” And looking round, she found the
shadows exaggerated with solemnity; the thin
candle-flames stretched up anxiously: a predicament
must have become noticeable, even to the
room. Impressed by strangeness, by this pressure
of emergency, Lois plaited her hair in two plaits
instead of one and felt herself a different woman.
“What they never see,” she said rapidly, “is,
that I must do something.”
“I should write at once,” said Francie, “I’m
not sure that I shouldn’t even telegraph, if it were
not for the post-mistress. I should say ... Well,
I don’t know really: I do wish Marda were here!”
“If I learn German they say, why not Italian?
And when I learn Italian they take no interest.”
Francie picked up the evening dress that Lois
had just stepped out of, stared, and remarked to
it, almost with incredulity: “Love is everything!”
“At least Gerald is definite. He, I ...”
“I know love is so important.”
“At least it may get one somewhere.”
Francie, raising her voice to a scared note, as
though she must make quite certain what they were
really talking about, cried: “There are such mistakes!”
“I wouldn’t mind being properly tragic....”
“If one’s not quite certain, one never knows
where one is.”
“—It’s just that I feel so humiliated the whole
time.”
“But the young man ...” persisted Francie.
They looked at each other, or at where the other
had been. Francie, deserted at once by the conspiratorial
courage that brought her in, dolefully
put a finger over her lips, as though betrayed
irrevocably by what had come out of them. She
visibly shrank with misgiving.
“You seem very intellectual, Lois. Do—do you
not love him?”
“I must,” said Lois. She put her hands up to
the back of her neck, fumbling open the clasp of
her corals. She could feel the bright girl she had
been for Mrs. Montmorency disintegrate: much
that even she had taken to be herself went with
the illusion.
“I just thought I might have helped,” said Francie,
in a spent, remote little voice, as though they
were both coming back from a funeral to an imposingly
vacant house.
“Oh, you have indeed,” said Lois. And she stood
there vacantly and, she felt, rather gruesomely
smiling, weighing her coral beads up and down
in a hand, trying to remember what they had both
said, what they had meant, what it had been about.
Francie took up her heavy candlestick and looked
about for the door. She sighed and said it had been
a tiring day. She could not bear to feel she was
not missed out after all, had not been passed by
because there was nothing to pass her. It was
late at night for so fundamental a disappointment.
There seemed some difficulty about getting her
back to her room, though they both desired this.
Lois opened the door; they heard Sir Richard and
Hugo arguing up the stairs. Francie shielded her
candle-flame with her hand and wavered out round
the door like a shadow.
Lois, hot with retrospective embarrassment,
slipped from her clothes and blew out the candles
quickly. The dark was gratefully positive. She
lay on her side with knees drawn up to her chin,
blankness snowing down on her till, quite snowed
up in blankness, she was asleep.
Next day, mist lay on the fields like a blanket,
muffling sound so that the postman arrived unexpectedly.
He brought a letter from Gerald: “For
God’s sake see me.” She meant to go out to meet
Gerald, bright and matter of fact, but this miscarried:
when he came, in the evening, she was half-way down
from the garden, fighting with Laurence over a
snail. He had walked on the snail on purpose.
“Ough—you fool ... you beast, Laurence!”
“Well, I didn’t mean to be kind to it.”
“Just because it had no mentality.”
“Not at all.”
“Ough, it’s all over the path.”
“It’s scrunched ... I dare say,” said Laurence,
pleased, “I am pathological.”
“Great fat feet!”
As a matter of fact, he was sorry about the snail;
he had thought it was just a shell, but he wasn’t going
to say so. “Little mother,” he said unpleasantly.
“Laurence, you’re insane. Ough, you’re wiping
it off everywhere. I shall be sick!”
“Do.”
“Well, I won’t then.”
“I had no idea you were so fond of animals,”
he said as offensively as possible. But he was not
feeling up to much this evening and could not
think what else to say to her. He turned and
walked briskly away towards the avenue, conscious
of having no objective. An unusual evening,
however, awaited him. In a boreen in the Castle
Trent direction he met three armed men coming
out of a gate. They made him put up his hands
and march smartly down the boreen ahead of them.
He discovered that under these conditions the mind
works fast but unfruitfully; he noted details sharply
and then forgot. When they came to the wall of
the graveyard he was embarrassed, but they only
asked for his shoes and the loan of his wrist-watch.
Placing him with his face close up to the wall they
advised him for life’s sake not to look round or
stir for twenty minutes. “How shall I know?”
said Laurence, “you’ve got my watch.” But they
did not care and went away with his shoes. Laurence
remained with his forehead against the stone
for fifty minutes, horse-flies biting him through the
socks. Then he limped home to dinner and an
audience, considerably cheered. Three days after,
the watch was posted back to his Uncle Richard:
it was in excellent order and ticked as it was taken
out of the package. “Which just shows,” said
Sir Richard, holding the watch to his ear with
satisfaction. But that was a day of confusion;
nobody listened.
As Lois ran down from the garden, swollen about
the personality with annoyance, she saw Gerald
waiting at a turn of the path by a holly tree. He
looked intently at her advancing, without comprehension,
as though she had been a picture.
Though they were alone, he did not put out a hand
or move towards her. He stood there with the
vigour, grief and indifference of a tree that cannot
help growing.
“Gerald?”
“What’s the matter?” he said, impassive.
“Oh, Laurence walked on a snail!”
“Bad luck!”
“My dear, he liked it.”
“Queer,” said Gerald, finding the word with
difficulty.
“Where shall we go?” she asked, while something
in her stopped like a clock with foreboding.
The encounter, uncoloured by surprise or passion,
left her quite at a loss. Unkissed, her mouth
and cheeks felt a touch of ice.
“It seems now,” said Gerald, impersonally, as
though delivering a message, “that we can’t ever
be married.”
“Why? When?” she cried angrily.
Gerald looked at her under level eyelids. She
remembered saying: “I wish you wouldn’t keep
looking so pleased the whole time.” Now his look
and silence were cold with a doomed expectancy:
she nearly hated him. Dumbly, in happy-seeming
physical agreement like a pair of animals, they
wheeled off down the path together, crossed the
yard rapidly and came into the plantation ribbed
with shadow and lanced across with light about
the eye-level. He told her her aunt agreed he was
not good enough, it would never do at all, her
aunt had said. Looking angrily up the tree-trunks,
she exclaimed that her aunt was mad.
She repeated this with vehemence and confusion,
pulling at her fingers. He listened to her in
silence, wounded, wounded. She wished they
had not come down—overruling possibly in each
other some desire for space—to the plantation
where, constricted by firs, thought and movement
were difficult and upright shadows emphasized his
severity. “She advised me,” Gerald concluded,
“to have a frank talk with you.”
“Is this the frank talk now?”
“She was certain you didn’t love me.”
“Gerald—why weren’t you furious?”
“I ... I don’t know,” he said, surprised by
the question. She saw him standing confused, like
a foreigner with whom by some failure in her vocabulary
all communication was interrupted. Her mind
halted and she wanted to run away. “Gerald, come
back. I’m wretched. Why do we have to talk?”
“I thought you liked that....” Outside himself
with passion he cried: “I’d rather be dead than
not understand!”
“But don’t you know I ...? Gerald?”
If he did not know, it would be quite over.
She watched with agony what seemed to be his
indifference. They were each waiting for the other.
He watched her hand, on a tree-trunk, pick like a bird
at the scaly bark. Her hand, which immediately
centred her consciousness of him, paused and became
quite rigid, fingers spread out. When he saw
her hand so quiet, he would have to be certain.
And he immediately said with his usual little resigned
inflection: “You see, you are everything.”
“I know,” she said, impersonal.
“I suppose you are what I mean by life....
Do you understand at all?”
“You sometimes make me.” She wanted to
add: “Touch me now:” it was the only way across.
In her impotence, her desolation—among the
severe trees—at not being compelled, she made a
beseeching movement which he—remote in a
rather sublime perplexity that transcended pain—either
ignored or rejected. From the stables, the
six o’clock bell sent out relief in a jerky, metallic passage
of sound through the plantation. She wanted
something to look at, to follow: a train curving
past in a rush. With an exaggerated movement,
she put up her hands to her ears. Gerald’s face, in
a band of light, remained impassible.
“Gerald, you’re making us lose each other!”
she shouted above the bell.
“But I mean to say: what would you lose?”
“Everything.”
“Do you mean that?” A light ran almost
visibly up inside him. She saw now where they
were and why he had come.
She thought of going, hesitating with delight,
to the edge of an unknown high-up terrace, of
Marda, of getting into a train. “No,” she cried,
terrified, “why should I?”
“Then we don’t mean the same thing.”
“Why don’t you make me ... like you?”
“I thought I could. I know I can—when I’m
not with you.”
“Damn, damn,” said Lois. “I do want you!”
Gerald said piteously: “Then why can’t it all
be simple?”
“But it’s our being so young,” she said, too
eagerly, “and then, money. I mean, we have got
to be practical.”
He explained to her, wide-eyed: “It isn’t anything
practical that makes all this—like death.
What she said was; that if you loved me ...”
“It’s like a nightmare that even you should begin
to talk. I thought you were a rock: I was safe
with you. Gerald, really, this is all like a net;
little twists of conversation knotted together. One
can’t move, one doesn’t know where one is. I
really can’t live at all if it has all got to be arranged.
I tell you, even what I think isn’t my own, and
Mrs. Montmorency comes bursting into my room
at nights. Even Marda—nothing we said to
each other mattered, it hasn’t stayed, she goes off to
get married in a mechanical sort of way. She
thinks herself so damned funny—it’s cheap, really.
All that matters is what you believe—Gerald,
you’ll kill me, just standing there. You don’t
know what it’s like for a snail, being walked
on....”
“I don’t understand you,” he cried in agony.
“Who is a snail?”
“I didn’t ask you to understand me: I was so
happy, I was so safe.”
Gerald noticed a change somewhere; the light
was gone from his face, moving down the trees
it had disappeared. He looked at his wrist-watch.
They had been a short time together, almost twenty
minutes. “When were you happy?” he said
accurately. He would have liked to be sure of
this, and of several other matters: she was not collected
enough to explain. He eyed the incredible
wood, the path, her unchanged figure in the cheerful
blue woollen dress. Something struggled free in
his brain and said, quite apart from his numbed
self: “My darling, don’t, don’t rack yourself.
You know this will be always the same for me.
Whatever’s impossible, you will always be perfect.
I know we’re different about things: if that didn’t
hurt you it would never matter to me. I mean,
don’t let’s be disappointed. You know I’m not
giving you up, I could never have done that. But
it’s just that, you see, you never ... I suppose
things can’t come out what one wants.... I suppose
it would hardly do....”
“But, Gerald, where are we?”
He said, “Don’t worry.” They were both, he
knew, entirely lost.
“But what have I done? What have I not
done?” After a minute, during which she heard
him finger his belt—his fingers slipped on the
leather—she shut her eyes and said, “So you’re
certain I don’t love you?”
No answer. “Oh, leave that belt alone, Gerald!”
Still no answer, as though he were asleep. And
indeed he felt, as at the approach of sleep, an
immense indifference. She, tortured by the loneliness
of insomnia, had to cry out: “Won’t you
even just try—won’t you just kiss me?”
“I don’t think ...”
“All right.”
“Look, I must go now.” Vaguely, he saluted
and began to go up the path, towards the beech
walk, towards the house.
“Good-bye?” she said.
He only half paused. “No, don’t let’s ...”
“Where did you leave your bicycle?”
He was well up the path; he called back: “Against
the hedge. You know, under the tennis courts.”
She knew; she remembered him pulling leaves
from the privet hedge, scattering them on the grass
and throwing them over her. She remembered
that Mrs. Boatley was a Christian Scientist. It
seemed a good thing summer was practically over;
there might not be more tennis parties. But at
this the incomprehensible glare of summer blinded
her, bringing tears to her eyes. “Gerald!” she
called.
But by this time he seemed to be out of ear-shot.
XXIII
ANOTHER thing Lady Naylor had noticed
about the English was, a disposition they
had to be socially visible before midday.
Soon after ten, she had heard, Mrs. Vermont
and her friends were to be seen about the streets of
Clonmore—from behind the still decently somnolent
blinds of inhabitants—with gloves buttoned
tight at the wrists, swinging coloured baskets.
Before eleven, they would be seated behind the
confectioner’s window, deploring the coffee. Mrs.
Rolfe had once had Moriarty’s shutters taken down
for her specially—and she wishful, Moriarty said,
to purchase the one pair of stockings only. A
Mrs. Peake, of the Gunners, demanded attention
at the hairdresser’s before ten. These unnatural
practices were a strain in the town’s normality;
the streets had a haggard look, ready for anything.
Really, as Lady Naylor said, almost English.
She thought of the south of England as a kind of
extension of Brighton, the north serrated by factory
chimneys, the middle a blank space occupied
by Anna Partridge. Only Danielstown’s being out
of dropping- or popping-in distance from Clonmore
deprived her, as it transpired, of matutinal
visits from Mrs. Vermont and her friends.
Mrs. Vermont, however, overcame difficulties,
hired a Ford and had herself driven over one
morning about eleven o’clock. She brought her
great friend Mrs. Rolfe; they were on their way
to lunch at the Thompsons’. This she explained
before they were out of the car; she knew what
Mondays were, she did not want to alarm Lady
Naylor—being so much with Mother had made
her considerate in these matters. Lady Naylor, as
a matter of fact, would have minded them less at
lunch-time; one didn’t notice people so much at
meals, she discovered. When news of the dropping
in came down to the kitchen, she groaned: “My
morning!” Nothing could have been worse.
Francie was lying down with “a head”; Hugo
was talking over old times with the coachman, who
had been pensioned off and brooded all day in the
harness-room, much at a loss. Lois, indirectly
responsible for the outrage, was not to be found.
She had not been herself at all, these last few days.
Her aunt, after Gerald’s departure, had made a
point of saying: “Well, I hope, of course, you
have not made a mistake. But we all have to
settle these things for ourselves, you know.”
Francie never failed to inquire if she were getting
on nicely with the Italian; her uncle agreed it was
high time she went to that school of art. This
morning she seemed to be nowhere; shouting did
not produce her.
Laurence, always unfortunate, was surprised on
the steps with Locke. “Oh God,” he said as the
Ford came round the bend of the lower avenue.
He turned, too late, to escape; the girl wives were
already shouting and waving.
Betty said: “Denise, this is Mr. — (Oh dear,
how awful!) This is Mrs. Rolfe of the Gunners;
my great friend, you know.”
“Good,” said Laurence. Denise glanced up,
apprehensive, at all the windows. Laurence stood
looking at them with resignation; he forgot to
open the door of the car though they brimmed
out over it.
“May we get out?” asked Betty, tittering up at
him in the friendliest way from a perfect swirl of
furs and red crêpe de Chine. On their knees, two
little pairs of hands curled like loose chrysanthemums
over their kid pochettes. He let them out
and they ran up the steps shaking out their dresses.
“Oh, what a brainy book!” cried Betty, pouncing.
“—My dear, just look what he’s reading—oh, you
have got a brain! I mean, fancy reading ...”
“You’re at college, aren’t you?” said Denise,
fluttered.
“Sometimes,” said Laurence accurately. Opening
his mouth very wide he shouted for Lois.
They shrieked and covered their ears. “I expect,”
he said finally, “I had better go in and look for—”
“Don’t go! I’m sure they will all come out....
I did want Denise to see a lovely old Irish home.”
“Yes, we are quaint, really,” said Laurence,
considering. “And you oughtn’t to miss the
Trents; has she seen the Trents?”
“Well, I hardly know the Trents. Here, we
always feel that Gerald is such a link.”
“Missing or otherwise,” Denise added.
“Exactly.” Betty smiled at him sidelong, but
all the same, it did seem a pity it should be Laurence
that they had dropped in on with unintended
accuracy. This was not at all what she had led
Denise to expect. Laurence’s not quite rudeness
was, in fact, rather international—she supposed,
Oxford. She said: “I have a boy cousin at Reading
University. That’s quite near Oxford, isn’t
it?” Denise, plaintive, said that a wasp was bothering;
she wanted to go indoors and see the reputed
ancestors. Betty flapped with her pochette and
the end of her fur. “She’s terrified of wasps!”
“So am I,” said Laurence, backing, “absolutely
terrified. I think I’d better go and—better get
a—” He disappeared through the glass door,
shutting it.
Denise said: “Well, I do think people are extraordinary.”
They both sat down and yawned. All
these trees; it was quite extraordinary. “Is that
Lois’s cousin?”
“More or less.”
“Well, I always did think she was an odd girl.”
“Ssh, there’s Sir Richard writing in the library—Denise,
just look through, sideways. He’s such
a type.”
“O-oh ... yes. Is he a knight or a baronet?”
“Well, I don’t see how he could have been
knighted.”
“My dear, ssssh!”
“He’s deaf. Oh, darling, look at those little
teeny black cows. Those are Kerry cows. They
farm, you know; they have heaps of cattle.”
“I always meant to ask you: are there Kilkenny
cats?”
“Really,” said Mrs. Vermont, annoyed, as her
friend yawned again and she felt her own jaw
quiver, “when one thinks these are the people we
are defending! I wonder if they’ll offer us any
coffee. What I think about Irish hospitality:
either they almost knock you down or they don’t
look at you. Or I tell you what, we might go out
to the garden and get some plums. Only I would
like you to see the drawing-room. I wish these
were Livvy’s people; the boys say her house smells—I
hope you aren’t bored, darling?—I mean,
what I mean about Livvy; she does grow on you.
I can’t think what Gerald sees in this family, I
must say. It isn’t even as if Lois—”
“Of course, I always did think she was an odd
girl.”
At this point Sir Richard, who was not deaf,
came out in despair. He said this was too bad;
he couldn’t think what could have become of Lois.
“We might shout,” he said helplessly.
“Your nephew has been shouting.”
“Still,” said Sir Richard, and shouted again.
“How are you all getting on?” he said kindly, when
he had recovered his breath.
Betty said with dignity: “There may be going
to be an offensive.”
“Sssh,” whispered Denise, pinching her elbow.
“Though I ought not really to tell you.”
“Never mind,” said Sir Richard, “I don’t suppose
it will come to anything. Besides, now the
days are drawing in— But this is too bad
really, most unfortunate that my wife should
not be here to receive you. She will be most distressed.”
“Oh, but we just dropped in. As I said to
Denise, what is the good of being in Ireland if
one isn’t a bit unconventional?”
“She will be most distressed.”
“Don’t bother! We’ve been admiring your
darling cows.”
“I’ll just go in and inquire,” said Sir Richard
firmly and disappeared, shutting the glass door.
Denise said she would get the giggles: a seizure
did seem to be imminent. “Well, I must say,
Gerald is well out of this family.”
“But, my dear, is he?”
“Something’s happened. He’s black—even
Timmy noticed. I said to Timmy: ‘You must
find out’—’Cause I think, don’t you, that when
men get together ... You see, I can’t—though I
can’t bear to see the boy suffer.”
“But I thought you said you—”
“Well, I’ve seen him in the distance and he didn’t
look like himself at all. But he hasn’t been near
us, or to the Club, or into the Fogartys’. And as
I was saying to Mrs. Fogarty—”
“It seems to me he’s been treated rottenly. If
it were one of our boys, my dear, I should be
fur-rious.”
“All the same, I do want to see Lois....”
“What he sees in her, I cannot imagine. She’s
what I should call rather affected—”
“Sssh—Oh, hullo, Lois!” they cried in unison.
Lois, unbecomingly bright, came up from the
beech walk.
“Oh, hullo,” she said, “splendid!”
“We’ve just been talking about you.”
“O-oh. Can’t you stay to lunch?”
“No can do; we’re off to the Thompsons. My
dear, aren’t you thrilled about Livvy and David!
Isn’t it marvellous?”
“Thrilled, it’s absolutely marvellous. Do stay
to lunch—I mean,” she said agitatedly, “do come
back to tea? Oh no, we shall all be out. Oh, how
rotten. Or come to tennis—no, I believe there
won’t be any more tennis; Laurence is going back
to Oxford and the rain’s washed all the marking off
the court. Perhaps we could have a dance or
something—”
The two young wives eyed her lightly and curiously;
their looks ran over her form like spiders.
They were so womanly, she could have turned and
fled back down the beech walk. “Donne ch’avete
intelletto d’amore,” she thought to herself wildly.
And the pause, the suspicion of some deformity
that these ladies produced in her became so acute
that she smiled more widely. She buttoned her
cardigan up to the top, then unbuttoned it.
“Oh, but don’t go now,” she said, but looked
at their Ford, longingly.
“Oh, we must, we have been here hours, watching
your darling cows.”
“I’m afraid they’re very much in the distance.
Does Aunt Myra—?”
“Oh, we’d hate to disturb her. Unless we
might all run round the garden—?”
“It’s locked and I’ve lost the key. I feel quite
an outcast. That’s what has been the matter the
whole morning. Do have something to eat—have
some biscuits?”
“Unless we just come into the drawing-room for
one moment?”
“I always think drawing-rooms in the morning
are so depressing.”
Denise said she did not see how the same room
could be much different, but it was no good; Lois
seemed determined to keep them out. From the
way she shifted her feet and stared round, you would
have said she was expecting bad news momentarily:
she talked so much that they hadn’t a chance
to express themselves. She went in for a tin of
petit beurres and offered it with an odd air, rather
propitiatory. Lady Naylor called from an upstairs
window that this was too bad, that she was
so much distressed, she would be down immediately.
“She spends whole mornings with the
cook,” said Lois. “I cannot think what they do.
I believe they fence verbally. More biscuits?”
“No, we shall spoil our din-dins. Denise, we
must come. I hear old Mr. Thompson is a terrible
ogre. Any messages in Clonmore, Lois? Any
messages to Gerald?”
Lois thought she must blush, but did not; even
her blood stood still.
“I should ask him,” said Denise, “why he didn’t
send you a message. I think it was odd of him;
I should be fur-rious.” Lois saw, with interest, a
ripple of light down their dresses; they nudged
each other. There must be something odd about
her, really, if they had noticed; she must clearly
be outside life.
“How is the gramophone?” she said enthusiastically.
“Don’t ask! Gerald is going to Cork to bring
back a new one. We thought we might all go
too, it would be a rag.”
“Marvellous!”
“Look, I’ll just run Denise in to have a look
at the drawing-room.”
“I shouldn’t, really. I haven’t done the flowers.”
“Gerald says all your looking-glasses make him
feel sleepy. He’s a funny boy, in a way,” said
Betty innocently. “You don’t think we ought to
wait till we’ve seen your aunt? She won’t be
offended?”
“I shouldn’t really; she’s probably been delayed.”
Lady Naylor did, in fact, arrive on the steps in
time to utter exclamations of despair as they drove
away. “Too bad, too bad!” she called, waving
after them. “You must come again soon!...
Really, Lois, you might have found them some
fruit or something. Fancy puffing them out with
biscuits at this hour.”
“I tell you what I think it is about Lois,” said
Betty cosily, nestling down in the car as the trees
rushed over them. “I think he’s left her.”
Denise agreed. “A boy needs keeping, if you
know what I mean.” Betty also told her what
she thought about the Naylor family: they were
going down in the world. “I should not be surprised
if they never used that drawing-room,” she
said viciously. “It smells of damp. Myself,
I do like a house to be bright and homey.”
The world did not stand still, though the household
at Danielstown and the Thompsons’ lunch
party took no account of it. The shocking news
reached Clonmore that night, about eight o’clock.
It crashed upon the unknowingness of the town
like a wave that for two hours, since the event, had
been rising and toppling, imminent. The news
crept down streets from door to door like a dull wind,
fingering the nerves, pausing. In the hotel bars,
heads went this way and that way, quick with
suspicion. The Fogartys’ Eileen, called by a
friend while she was clearing away the supper,
cried “God help him!” and stumbled up to Mr.
Fogarty’s door, blubbered. Mr. Fogarty dropped
his glass and stood bent some time like an animal,
chin on the mantelpiece. Philosophy did not help;
in his thickening brain actuality turned like a mill-wheel.
His wife, magnificent in her disbelief, ran
out, wisps blowing, round the square and through
the vindictively silent town.
Barracks were closed, she could not get past the
guards; for once she was at a loss, among strangers.
She thought mechanically “His mother,” and
pressed her hands up under her vast and useless
bosom. Trees in the square, uneasy, shifted dulled
leaves that should already have fallen under the
darkness. The shocking news, brought in at the
barrack gates officially, produced an abashed silence,
hard repercussions, darkness of thought and a loud
glare of electricity. In Gerald’s room some new
music for the jazz band, caught in a draught,
flopped over and over. An orderly put it away,
shocked. All night some windows let out, over the
sandbags, a squeamish, defiant yellow.
Mrs. Vermont heard when Timmy had just gone
out; he was to be out all night with a patrol. She
was to sleep alone, she could not bear it. Past
fear, she ran to the Rolfes’ hut. She spent the night
there, sobbing, tearing off with her teeth the lace
right round her handkerchief. Captain Rolfe kept
bringing her hot whisky. “I can’t, I can’t, not
whisky; it’s so awful.” They all felt naked and
were ashamed of each other, as though they had
been wrecked. From the hut floor—where they
had danced—the wicker furniture seemed to rise
and waver.
“Percy, where did he—how was he—?”
“Through the head.”
“Then it didn’t—?”
“Oh no. Probably instantaneous.”
“Oh, don’t! Oh, Percy, how can you!”
Denise repeated: “I can’t believe it.” And
while the others sickly, furtively stared, she tried
to press from her hair the waves she had had put
in that morning. “You know, I can’t believe it.
Can you, Betty? It’s so ... extraordinary.”
“Why can’t we all go home? Why did we stay
here? Why don’t we all go home? That’s what
I can’t understand.”
“Percy, can you believe it? I mean, I remember
him coming in and standing against this table—”
“Oh, don’t!—Percy, what became of them?
Where did they go? Those devils!”
“Oh, got right away.”
“Didn’t anyone hear anything, any firing? I
mean, didn’t it make a noise?... Couldn’t they
be tortured—why should they just be hanged or
shot? Oh, I do think, I mean I do think when
you think—”
“Well, we’ve got to get ’em, haven’t we? Look,
just try—”
“Oh, I can’t, I tell you— Why can’t we all
go home!”
“Percy, leave her alone! Oh God, my head; I
shall cut my hair off. I mean, he came in and stood
there against that table. Why did they get just
Gerald?—Oh yes, I know there was the sergeant—but
he won’t die; I know he won’t die.... I
can’t believe it! Percy, can you believe it? Percy,
say something.”
Betty sobbed: “I should like to—oh, I should
like to— Those beasts, those beasts!”
“Look, you two girls go to bed.”
“Oh, how can we!”
“Oh, why isn’t Timmy here? I mean, when I
think of Timmy, and out all night—I can’t understand
the King, I can’t understand the Government:
I think it’s awful!”
But they went to bed—Percy spent the night
on two chairs—and lay in what seemed to both
an unnatural contiguity, re-clasping each other’s
fingers, talking of “Him,” of “you know who” and
“that boy” in the eager voices, low-pitched and
breaking, kept as a rule to discuss the intimacies
of their marriages. In the same moment they fell,
dimly shocked at each other, asleep. Then Denise
saw Lois clearly, standing affectedly on the Danielstown
steps with a tin of biscuits, a room full of
mirrors behind her. And Betty woke with surprise
to hear herself say: “What I mean is, it seems
so odd that he shouldn’t really have meant anything.”
They heard an early bugle shivering in the rain.
XXIV
MR. DAVENTRY arrived before the postman.
He had not paid an unofficial
visit since he had been in Ireland; it
seemed to him odd there should be nothing to
search for, nobody to interrogate. It was early,
wet tarnished branches came cheerfully through
the mist. He had come to the gate with a convoy
on its way over to Ballyhinch; two lorries had
ground into silence and waited for him at the gate,
alarming the cottagers. He walked up the avenue
lightly and rapidly: nothing, at the stage things had
reached for him, mattered. And superciliously
he returned the stare of the house.
He rang and made his demand. Lois came out
slowly, dumb with all she must begin to say—for
who could an anxious waiting officer be but Gerald?
“Really ...” Lady Naylor had said, with a glance
at the clock, advising her to put down her table
napkin. And Francie, smiling, had covered up
her egg for her.
“You?” she now said while everything, the
importance of everything, faintly altered. “Come
and have breakfast.”
He told her that there had been a catastrophe
yesterday, west of Clonmore: a patrol with an
officer and an N.C.O. had been ambushed, fired
on at a cross-roads. The officer—Lesworth—was
instantly killed, the N.C.O. shot in the stomach.
The enemy made off across country, they did not
care for sustained fire, in spite of the hedges. The
men did what they could for the sergeant.
“Will he die?”
“Probably.”
“And Gerald was killed.”
“Yes. Would you—?”
“I’m all right, thank you.”
“Right you are.” He turned round and stood
with his back to her. She asked what time it had
happened; he said about six o’clock. She thought
how accurate Gerald was and how anxious, last
time, he had been to establish just when she had
been happy because of him, on what day, for how
long. “They’d been out all the afternoon?” They
both saw the amazed white road and dust, displaced
by the fall, slowly settling. “As a matter of fact,”
said Daventry, “we were mostly ready for things.
I don’t suppose—if he knew at all—it mattered.”
“No, I don’t suppose, to oneself, it ever would
matter much.” But she thought of Gerald in the
surprise of death. He gave himself up to surprise
with peculiar candour.
“Thank you for coming.”
“I was passing this way anyhow.”
“But still, there was no reason why you should
take the trouble.”
Daventry glanced at her, then at the gravel under
his feet, without speculation. Cold and ironical,
he was a stay; he was not expecting anything of
her. He finally said: “It seemed practical. Would
you like me to—shall I just let the others know?”
She nodded, wondering where to go, how long to
stay there, how to come back. Her mind flooded
with trivialities. She wondered who would go up
to the tennis this afternoon, if there would be anyone
left who did not know, who would expect him;
she wondered what would become of the Jazz band.
She saw for days ahead she must not deny humanity,
she would have no privacy. “As a matter of fact,
they are expecting me back to breakfast.”
But at the thought of Francie’s tender and proud
smile, covering up her egg, she was enlightened
and steadied by grief, as at the touch of finger-tips.
She went into the house and up to the top to meet
what was waiting. Life, seen whole for a moment,
was one act of apprehension, the apprehension of
death. Daventry, staring at her in memory—she
was, after all, a woman—went into the hall. Here,
it pleased him to think of Gerald socially circumspect
under the portraits.
He waited. The dining-room door swung open
on a continued argument; they came out one by
one, each on the threshold, balanced momentarily
like a ball on a fountain by the shock of seeing him.
“Lady Naylor?” he said to Francie. “Oh no!” she
seemed appalled at the supposition. “Isn’t ...
Mr. Lesworth here?” “Not to-day.” Lady Naylor
came last and stared hardest: really, the Army
seemed to be inexhaustible. He told her. “Oh,
no!” she said quickly, as though to prevent something.
He told her the circumstances. “Oh—no,”
she repeated, and turned in appeal to her
husband. “That is ... that is too bad,” said
Sir Richard and in despairing confusion touched
her shoulder. He looked back into the dining-room
at the chairs and plates and table, incredible
in their survival.
The fact was, they did not at all care for the look
of Mr. Daventry. They felt instinctively that he
had come here to search the house. Lady Naylor,
still statuesque from the shock, made, even, a little
disdainful gesture, a kind of: “Here’s everything.”
He, unconscious of her impression of being brought
to book, remained staring darkly and piercingly
past her. Behind her, across the dark dining-room,
he saw through a window the lawn striped with
mist and sunshine. In Clonmore it had rained
that morning: they seemed to have escaped that
too. She said sharply: “Where’s Lois?”
“I’m afraid I don’t know,” he replied, indifferent.
“She—you have—?”
“Oh, yes.”
Her defensive dropped; she said with heartbroken
eyes on his face: “You know, we knew him
so well. He came out here so often to tennis. It
seems queer that one can’t—that one never—
He was so—”
“Yes he was, wasn’t he?”
“His mother, he used to tell me about his mother.
Who will write? I should like to write to her.
Yes, I want very much to write to her. I think she
might like—we did know him so well, you see—
Richard, don’t you think I—?”
But Sir Richard had slipped away quietly; he was
an old man, really, outside all this, and did not know
what to do. He was wondering, also, about the
Connors. Peter Connor’s friends—they knew
everything, they were persistent: it did not do to
imagine....
Mr. Daventry said that was all, he thought; he
must go now. He took leave with unfriendly
courtesy and went off abruptly, with an air that
obliterated them, as though he had never been into
their house at all. Then she exclaimed, recollecting
herself: “He must be unhappy; I ought to have
said something.” There was so much to do now,
more than would fit into a morning; she had some
idea of postponing lunch. And hearing the postman,
she half thought, terrified by a sense of exposure:
“Suppose there should be a—suppose he
should have—”
But there was no letter for Lois from Gerald.
No one was on the steps to hear the news from
the postman; he went away disappointed. Lady
Naylor thought firmly: “Now I must go and find
Lois.” But she did not go; things seemed to delay
her. She looked into the drawing-room to see
whether something—she wasn’t certain what—was
there. Francie, red-eyed, looked guiltily over the
back of the sofa. They did not say anything.
The room became so sharply painful that Lady
Naylor almost exclaimed: “Lois has not done the
flowers!”
It was Laurence who, walking about the grounds
unguardedly, was exposed to what they all dreaded.
He came on Lois, standing beside a holly tree.
She could have moved away, but seemed not so
much rooted as indifferent.
“It’s all right,” she explained, and added: “I’m
just thinking.”
His look became almost personal, as though he had
recognized her. He said: “I think I should. I expect—I
don’t know—one probably gets past things.”
“But look here, there are things that one can’t—”
(She meant: “He loved me, he believed in
the British Empire.”) “At least, I don’t want to.”
“Perhaps you are right,” he said, studying, with
an effort of sight and of comprehension, some
unfamiliar landscape.
“No, I don’t specially. Though if it has to be
anyone, you.”
Taking this for what it was worth, he went on,
brushing awkwardly past her against the laurels.
A fortnight later, Mrs. Trent drove over, the
very evening of her return from the North. She
had been inexpressibly bored up there and wished
to complain. Lady Naylor, delighted, came out
to meet her; it was like old times again.
“The house feels empty. They’ve gone, you
know.”
“Yes, dear me. I was sorry not to have seen the
last of Hugo and poor little Francie. What about
their bungalow?”
“Oh, that was just an idea; they are quite off it.
Bungalows inland seem so pointless, cliffs are so
windy and one cannot live on a flat coast. No, they
think now of going to Madeira.”
“Then they won’t un-store the furniture?”
“I don’t think so; they never cared for it much.”
“It’s a pity he never did go to Canada.” Mrs.
Trent looked round at the pleasant fields and lawns,
the trees massive and tarnished, the windows that
from their now settled emptiness seemed to have
gained composure. Her sense of home-coming
extended even to Danielstown. She went on:
“How’s Richard? And listen: are you getting in
your apples?—we haven’t begun. They never get
anything done when I’m away. And tell me: how’s
Lois?”
“Oh, gone, you know.”
“Gone? Oh, the school of art!”
“Oh no,” said Lady Naylor, surprised. “Tours.
For her French, you know. And to such an interesting,
cultivated family; she is really fortunate. I
never have been happy about her French. As I
said to her, there will be plenty of time for Italian.”
“Oh, that’s splendid,” Mrs. Trent said vaguely
but warmly. “Then of course you must feel quiet.
Did she and Laurence travel over together?”
“She seemed so offended at being thought incompetent
and he was worried at the idea of looking
after her luggage, so we sent them over separately;
he crossed Wednesday, she Friday. Both nights, I
hear, it was rough.... Yes, it’s been sad here,
lately; we’ve been so much shocked and distressed
about that unfortunate young Lesworth. I think
I felt it particularly; he had been out here so much
and seemed so glad to talk, and had come, in a way,
to depend on one. Though it was a shock, too, for
Lois. You see they had really played tennis so
often and were beginning to be quite friends. She
did not take it as hard as I feared, girls of her generation
seem less sensitive, really.... I don’t
know; perhaps that is all for the best. And of
course she has so many interests. But it was
terrible, wasn’t it; I still think: how terrible. But
he did have a happy life. I wrote that to his
mother; I said, it must always be some consolation
to think how happy his life had been. He quite
beamed, really; he was the life and soul of everything.
And she wrote back—I did not think
tactfully, but of course she would be distracted—that
it was her first consolation to think he died in so
noble a cause.”
Mrs. Trent had for a moment an uneasy, exposed
look. She said: “It was heroic,” and glanced
down awkwardly at her gloves. She missed a dog,
she felt unstayed, there was no dog.
“Heroic,” said Lady Naylor, and scanned the
skies with eager big-pupilled eyes that reflected
the calm light. “Although,” she added, half in
surprise, “he could not help it.... But come
in now and tell Richard about the North, he will be
amused, though sorry that you were dull. To tell
you the truth, we both rather feared you might be.
Ah, don’t mind the time, I’m sure it’s early; come
in, come in!”
But Mrs. Trent could not, she was a punctilious
person and wore a wrist-watch. She had not even
sent round her dog-cart to the back; a man was
walking the cob up and down the avenue. “A flying
visit,” said Lady Naylor mournfully, having
prolonged the conversation by half an hour. Then
Mrs. Trent climbed briskly into the dog-cart and
gathered the reins up; they sighed at each other
their resignation to parting.
“Then we see you on Tuesday. Be sure and
come early, before the Hartigans.” To the domestic
landscape, Mrs. Trent nodded an approving
farewell. “Every autumn, it strikes me this place
looks really its best.”
“To tell you the truth, I really believe it does.
There is something in autumn,” said Lady Naylor.
She remained on the steps looking after the trap,
her hands restlessly, lightly folded. Some leaves
spun down from the gate with a home-coming air.
The two did not, however, again see Danielstown
at such a moment, such a particular happy point of
decline in the short curve of the day, the long curve
of the season. Here, there were no more autumns,
except for the trees. By next year light had possessed
itself of the vacancy, still with surprise.
Next year, the chestnuts and acorns pattered unheard
on the avenues, that, filmed over with green
already, should have been dull to the footsteps—but
there were no footsteps. Leaves, tottering
down the slope on the wind’s hesitation, banked
formless, frightened, against the too clear form of
the ruin.
For in February, before those leaves had visibly
budded, the death—execution, rather—of the three
houses, Danielstown, Castle Trent, Mount Isabel,
occurred in the same night. A fearful scarlet ate
up the hard spring darkness; indeed, it seemed
that an extra day, unreckoned, had come to abortive
birth that these things might happen. It seemed,
looking from east to west at the sky tall with scarlet,
that the country itself was burning; while to the
north the neck of mountains before Mount Isabel
was frightfully outlined. The roads in unnatural
dusk ran dark with movement, secretive or terrified;
not a tree, brushed pale by wind from the flames,
not a cabin pressed in despair to the bosom of night,
not a gate too starkly visible but had its place in the
design of order and panic. At Danielstown, half-way
up the avenue under the beeches, the thin iron
gate twanged (missed its latch, remained swinging
aghast) as the last unlit car slid out with the executioners
bland from accomplished duty. The sound
of the last car widened, gave itself to the open and
empty country and was demolished. Then the
first wave of a silence that was to be ultimate flowed
back, confident, to the steps. Above the steps, the
door stood open hospitably upon a furnace.
Sir Richard and Lady Naylor, not saying anything,
did not look at each other, for in the light
from the sky they saw too distinctly.