The George was King George the Third, and the
Crown was Queen Anne’s Crown, and they faced each
other across the street of Bullockdean. The George had
a face of stucco, cracked and discoloured with age and
the mists of the Ouse Valley, and a parapet behind which
its old roof rose rakish and wrinkled. The Crown’s face
was of ruddy brick, gashed with long, deep-set windows,
and topped by a huge pediment of new-painted whiteness.
So close and friendly were they that from one bar-parlour
you could almost see what was going on in the
other—that is, if you cared to look; but on the whole
the doings in the bar of the George had very little interest
for the bar of the Crown, and contrariwise. The
Crown catered chiefly for sedate farmers and good class
visitors from Lewes, Newhaven and Eastbourne—the
George catered for the rowdier elements of all three
towns, which frequented it at race-time, and the more
disreputable, poaching class of farm-labourer. The only
occasion when the two inns had had any manner of warfare
was when Mr. Munk, the landlord of the Crown,
sent over a dignified protest at the noise made by the
George’s dispersing drunks at closing-time; whereat Mr.
Sheather, the landlord of the George, had retorted that
the sight of the Crown’s lady visitors undressing with
the blind up was demoralizing his family.
On the whole the neighbourhood disapproved of the
George and approved of the Crown, though both were
equally frequented by different elements of local society.
The stain on the George’s sign was drunkenness, and,
it was whispered, betting too. Still, as everyone said,
what could you expect from a man like Tom Sheather,
who had gone roving in his youth and brought back a
wife from foreign parts? It was his own fault if the
George was but a sorry pub, while the Crown was very
nearly an hotel, with visitors staying all the summer.
Visitors would never stay at the George, even if there
was room for them, which there was not. Tom Sheather
filled the place up with his roughs, such as decent farmers
would not drink with. He’d have racing-men from
Lewes, a drunken, sharky lot—he’d have sailormen from
Newhaven, making a night of it in a hired shay. The
Oddfellows had given up meeting at the George ever
since the crew of a Margate trawler had insisted on
playing their piano for them; and if the Buffaloes still
met there it was only because Mr. Batup, their Grand
Master, had a liking for old Tom in spite of his rotten
ales.
As a matter of fact, most people liked Tom Sheather,
though it was agreed that you could never quite trust
him, and that you felt sorry for his second boy Daniel,
who was always having to play policeman to his dad.
The eldest son was married, and had a sad little farm
over at Brakey Bottom, beyond Telscombe, while the
third boy, Christopher, was no good to anybody. His
mother spoilt him, and gossip accused her of having kept
him at home by disreputable means, when other women’s
sons and her own elder boys had gone to the war.
The war had dealt hardly with the George. The
suspension of racing, the limitation of the hours in which
liquor could be sold, the no-treating order—all had been
bad for the George’s particular constitution, whereas the
Crown had thriven on high prices and a congested population.
Also James Munk had money come to him
through his wife, who at her death had left her entire
fortune to his enjoyment and disposal. While Tom
Sheather had none, for his parents at their death, shortly
before the war, were shown not to have dealt very wisely
with the landlords of streets, and of the little that they
left, nothing remained after a few years’ fluency in Tom’s
hands. It was obvious that he had not realized his ambition
of busting the Crown. But if there was little comfort
in the thought that he owed his failure largely to his
own mismanagement, there was considerable alleviation
in the fact that it troubled him not at all. He still
thought the George was a better pub than the Crown—he
would rather be in debt to his brewer and have a good
crowd of boys round him, than be solvent and honourable
like James Munk, and have nothing but a couple of old
maids dozing in his parlour—which he had let off to
them, so that he and his son Ernley had to sit in the
kitchen.
Anyhow Tom was better off in his home and family
than poor Munk, whose wife was dead and whose elder
son had been killed in the war, leaving him with no one
but Ernley, whom everybody knew was rotten—an officer
and a gentleman, but rotten. Whereas Tom had a tidy
little wife—even if she was growing a bit sharp-tongued
these days and inclined to snap her old man’s head off—and
three spanking boys: Len, who was clever as you
made ’em, for all he hadn’t been educated at Lancing
College like some folks’ sons; Dan, who was the
stoutest, handiest chap between Lewes and the sea; and
Chris, who was the handsomest.... He was glad they’d
all three come safe through the war, and if ever he wished
that the old George was a better paying concern, it was
for their sakes.... He’d have liked to be able to buy
Len some new machinery for that farm of his, which
wouldn’t produce more than one quarter to the acre—and
Chris had been badgering him for months because he
wanted new breeches and leggings—and it wouldn’t have
been a bad thing if old Dan could have had a boy to help
him in the yard.... But there you were—times were
bad for innkeepers, unless they were foxy like old Munk—and
anyhow, it was good to have his three boys under
his roof, even if he couldn’t give them all he and they
wanted. He liked to see them sitting in his bar.
They were all three sitting there that evening in
February, just twenty minutes before six and opening-time.
Len had come over from Telscombe to an auction
at Tarring Neville, and was on his way back, disappointed
because of high prices. Dan had just come back
from Batchelors’ Hall over by the Dicker—where he had
gone ostensibly to sell a pig, but really, as everyone
knew, to court Belle Shackford. Now he was helping
Christopher and his mother polish glasses in readiness
for six o’clock. The three young Sheathers were much
of a middle-size, but they were very different in face and
colouring. Leonard and Daniel were both dark, but
whereas the former had his mother’s sharp nose and
chin, the latter had the broad face, short nose and wide
mouth of his Saxon fathers. Christopher was blue-eyed
and flaxen, with a weaker version of Dan’s blunt nose,
and a sulky, inviting mouth.
There was a shuffling, scurrying sound outside,
followed by a rap on the door.
“Go see who that is, Dan,” said Kitty. “We aren’t
open yet.”
Dan unlocked the door, and revealed an ancient
shepherd in charge of some muddy tegs.
“Hullo, Mr. Gadgett! What brings you round at
this time?”
“’Tis gone six o’clock, Maas’ Sheather.”
“Not for half an hour,” called Kitty from the bar.
Mr. Gadgett consulted an elderly turnip.
“My watch says three o’clock, which means ten
minutes past six,” he affirmed.
“And my clock says half-past five, which means half-past
five,” said Kitty.
The old man heaved a deep sigh.
“I comed all the way from Brakey Bottom, and there’s
a wunnerful lot of mud on the roads. Leastways it wur
wunst on the roads—reckon it’s all on my boots now.”
“Poor old chap,” said Tom. “I can’t see any harm
in serving him. It’s nearly opening time.”
“Oh no, dad, it isn’t,” said Daniel.
“Besides, if it was,” said Len—“even if it was only
two minutes to six, you’d be breaking the damn law just
the same. The law’s a fine thing, ain’t it, Mr. Gadgett?”
The shepherd looked confused and weary.
“Wot wud six o’clock, and two o’clock and ten
o’clock, I’m wunnerful muddled.”
Dan felt sorry for him.
“Maybe we could let you have a cup of tea since it’s
too early for beer,” he suggested.
“Well, you go into the kitchen and make it,” said
his mother, “since you’re the only one who’s doing
nothing.”
This statement was open to challenge, but Dan
accepted it good-humouredly.
“I’m a fine handy one with the tea, ain’t I, mum?
You come around to the kitchen door, Mr. Gadgett, and
I’ll give you as good as ale.”
When he was gone, Leonard took his pipe out of his
mouth.
“This is an all-fool’s game with the clock. I wonder
you stick it, dad. If I was you I’d kick for my right to
sell my own beer at my own time.”
“It ain’t my own beer, seeing I haven’t paid for it
yet.”
“Maybe you could pay for it easy enough if they
didn’t tie you hand and foot in your trade. I tell you,
this sort of thing makes me sick. Us working like slaves,
and getting nothing but abuse and interference ... they
said ‘Come and fight for your country, and we’ll give
you a country fit for heroes.’ Now they say ‘You’ve
fought for your country—thanks—now get out of it.’
They tell us strong chaps to go and emigrate, and
I’m——”
“Well, I’d do it for two pins.”
“Don’t you make him think of it,” cried Kitty.
“He won’t be such a fool. Besides, it isn’t the same
for him as for me. He didn’t lose four years mucking
about, though it wasn’t his fault, like some——”
“Now, don’t you go hitting at me,” said Chris.
“I’m not hitting at you. It wasn’t your fault, neither—and
I’d never blame a young boy of eighteen for not
choosing to go out and get killed. But I blame those
chaps that hid in Government offices, and wore uniforms,
and got a thousand a year, and call themselves major and
colonel these days, and say to us poor fellows who were
fools enough to get sent out to France——”
“Oh, chuck it, Len,” said Chris.
“You’re a fine chap to say ‘chuck it.’”
“You said you never blame him,” broke in his mother.
“No more I do, but he’s got to let me talk.”
And talk he did.
Meanwhile in the kitchen Dan made tea for old Mr.
Gadgett. He had none of the normal awkwardness and
shame of a man making tea. The special complications
of his life had taught him to be handy at most things.
He blew up the dying fire into a roar, filled the kettle
with fresh water, fetched tea from the caddy and a cup
from the shelf just as efficiently and a good deal more
graciously than his mother would have done. Old
Gadgett watched him from the chair where he sat stiffly,
as one unused to rest.
“You’re a wunnerful kind young chap, Maas’
Sheather, and some day if you’ll come around to my
house I’ll show you what I ain’t shown nobody yet.”
“And what may that be?” asked Daniel.
“My teeth.”
“Your teeth!”
“Yes, you come around to my house and I’ll show
you my teeth.”
“But I didn’t know as you had any,” said Dan,
with a rather tactless stare at the thin, receding old
mouth.
“No, there ain’t many as knows; there’s doctor, and
there’s Miss Belle, and now there’s yourself—that’s all.
I don’t go wearing them about the place. But I’ve a
wunnerful fine set of teeth.”
“Got ’em at the hospital?” asked Dan, as he set the
tea on the table.
Mr. Gadgett, with deliberate, shaking hands, emptied
his cup into his saucer, and supped a few mouthfuls
before answering impressively:
“No—not I. I made ’em myself.”
“Reckon that was smart of you. How did you do
it?”
“It’s taken me nigh on ten year. They’re sheep’s
teeth, wot I’ve picked up on the hill, and rubbed ’em
and filed ’em till they’re a proper size. And I’ve strung
’em on two wires, and I hitch ’em around two old stumps
I’ve got ... you never saw the like.”
Dan was properly impressed.
“Reckon you’re a hem clever man, Mr. Gadgett;
and I bet you find ’em useful at supper time.”
Mr. Gadgett looked superior.
“Oh, I’d never use ’em for eating. They ain’t that
kind of teeth—and I don’t say as I can rightly speak
wud ’em. I wear ’em for the looks of things. Some
day I mean to have my likeness took wud them in. But
if you come around to my house I’ll show ’em to you.”
“I’ll come one day when I’m at Batchelors’. I’ll be
proud.”
“Reckon it ain’t everyone I’d show ’em to. But
you’ve done me a kindness to-day, Maas’ Sheather, and
it ain’t the fust. I often wish as my poor Ellen cud see
my teeth, for many’s the time she’s said, ‘If we cud only
get you fitted for a set of teeth, maaster.’ ... Maybe it’s
wot put the notion into my head, and I’m larmentable
sorry she didn’t live to see wot I done. Howsumdever,
they may have told her where’s she’s gone.... There’s
my dog barking—reckon the sheep’s uneasy; I mun be
off, or I’ll lose the moon before I get to Batchelors’.
Thank you kindly for the tea, Maas’ Sheather.”
He went out, comfortable and slaked. It was now
nearly six—a few more minutes would have seen him in
legal enjoyment of a glass of beer; but, reflected Daniel,
a cup of tea was better for these old chaps. He wished
the George would provide it as a matter of course,
instead of selling only brewers’ stuff. They’d never get
on that way; but dad cared for nothing but messing
about in the bar, and mother said she’d work enough
without waiting on strangers.... Dan shrugged and
whistled himself into his overcoat, then went back into
the taproom.
“Where are you going, Dan?” asked Kitty.
“Just round to the Parsonage to fix that henhouse,
and then I’ll go and see old Ernley for a bit.”
“You’re never at home. Is it not enough you
going out all day without being out half the night as
well?”
“The evening’s my best time for seeing my friends.”
“And a fine set of friends you have—a clergyman who
has holes in his coat, and a young girl who already makes
herself the talk of the place with your other friend; and
he’s a lazy, fine, wicked, extravagant young boy, who
rides about the country on a motor-bike and keeps an inn
that he says is better than ours.”
“And so it is, if you go by class. I’m unaccountable
fond of old Ernley, anyway. And reckon no one’s any
call to say anything against Miss Shackford—for it ain’t
true, and I won’t listen to it neither. And as for Mr.
Marchbanks, he pays me for what I do for him, and
it ain’t much.”
“Oh, you be off, then. I got Christopher to help me.
Thank God I got one son who stays at home.”
“Thank God you haven’t got two,” said Daniel good-humouredly,
“or the bills ’ud never get paid.”
“Now, don’t you get saucy.”
“He ain’t saucy, Kit,” put in his father; “he’s only
reminding you that all his outings ain’t for pleasure.
The boy’s a good boy, sure enough.”
Dan looked deprecatingly at his mother. He wondered
what she would do if he took her in his arms
and cuddled her. He had often wanted to, but something
about her made him shy. She would not like it
from him as she would from Chris. He had often seen
Chris put his arms round his mother and lay his cheek
against her shoulder.... He wanted to do that. But—well,
he didn’t like to, somehow. He pulled his cap
over the thick, shiny, black hair which was brushed
back undivided from his forehead, and went out with
rather a sheepish look in her direction.
“You’ll be back before closing time,” his father called
after him.
“Yes, I’ll be back.”
His voice came to them with the chiming of the
church clock as it struck six.
“Open the bar!” cried Tom Sheather.
It was nearly dark when Daniel went out. A sheet of
lingering red in the west showed up the masses of Fore
Hill and Bullock Down, but the rest of the sky was a dim,
lightless grey, pricked with a few stars, and the valley
beneath was grey, with the river dark among the mists,
save where its waters held one faint glimmer at the
Shine.
Dan blew on his hands, for he was cold; but his work
at the Parsonage would soon warm him. He must get
on with that henhouse ... and if the bulbs were to go
in, they’d better go in now. He wanted the garden to
look nice by springtime.... It would want a bit of
manure; he would see if he couldn’t get some from
Place....
Bullockdean Parsonage was a big, ramshackle house,
where the unmarried rector camped like some squatter
in the vastness of the prairie. Its few tokens of care
and ornament—that is to say, a bright blue gate and
windows and doors in the piecemeal process of becoming
blue, also an artistic flower-bed border of bottle glass and
scallop shells—were the fruits of Daniel’s industry.
Daniel “had an arrangement” with Mr. Marchbanks;
that is to say, he had quasi-sole charge of the house
and the garden for ten shillings a week. This worked
out to the rector’s advantage in that he would never have
found anyone else to do half the work for twice the
money; so he was willing to put up with a certain
growing eccentricity in the appearance of his domain.
It also worked out to Daniel’s advantage, for he could
come and go as he pleased, suiting his hours to the
demands of the George. At the same time it helped
lighten that house’s financial burden, for ten shillings a
week, he knew, went far in his mother’s thrifty housekeeping.
To-night he stood for a moment at the gate, contemplating
his handiwork with a satisfied smile. One of
the lower windows was lighted, and he could see through
its uncurtained panes a young man stooping over a
writing-table covered with books and papers. Mr. Marchbanks
was busy, and Dan had better get on with his
jobs without troubling him.
Dan had an almost maternal feeling for Mr. Marchbanks,
who had not been in Bullockdean more than two
years. He came from a big church in Oxford, where, by
report, he had spent his time in study and in writing
books. Why he had chosen to leave it for the care of
an obscure Sussex parish was his own private adventure.
He was still, after two years’ residence, inclined to be
shy of his country parishioners, whose ways were so
unlike the ways of Oxford; and they, on their side, were
inclined to look down on him for his lack of clerical state.
Also, immediately after his arrival, he had made an almost
fatal mistake. He had failed to see the devotional aspect
of a composition known as White-Wilcox in C, which had
been sung at harvest festivals in Bullockdean from the
days they were first started. All unknowing the enormity
he was contemplating, and having already made, without
outcry, several small changes in the direction of simplicity,
he abolished White-Wilcox’s crashes and quavers,
and substituted plainsong. The earth shook, the skies
roared, the heavens fell. More literally, the choir went
on strike, the people’s warden joined the Wesleyans,
and a protest was drawn up by the Oddfellows in the
bar of the Crown, and then taken across to be signed
by the Buffaloes in the bar of the George, providing
yet another instance of the Odium Gregorianum.
Then Mr. Marchbanks made a still worse blunder.
He retracted. Moved with pity for the simple souls he
had offended, and realizing that he had really dethroned
the local god, whose identity he had at first been at some
loss to discover, he restored White-Wilcox in C to all his
former glory. As he confined himself almost entirely to
the repeated statement that “Lebanon skips like a calf,
Sirion also like a young unicorn,” there was nothing that
made him unfit for Christmas, Easter or Whitsun or other
occasions of rejoicing. Once more his familiar arpeggios
wheezed forth on the organ, once more Mr. Pilbeam’s
alto took, even though it could not hold, notes above the
stave, while cantori and decani became antiphonally calves
and unicorns, and old Auntie Harman “joined in” as
usual from her pew, and you heard, as usual, her nieces
Jess and Maudie “shushing her down.” Mr. Marchbanks
thought he had re-established himself. But, on the
contrary, he had only doubled his error. His congregation
would now more than ever talk regretfully of “the
old days” which had been before he came. The “old
reverend” would never have taken away White-Wilcox
in C, but if he had, he would most certainly never have
put him back again; he’d have seen the entire congregation
Wesleyans first.
It was during these months of crisis that the rector
and Daniel Sheather became friends. Dan had no special
devotion to White-Wilcox, and he had never loved the
“old reverend,” who had once thrashed him for putting
a firework in the hinge of the parsonage gate. He was
sorry for Mr. Marchbanks, who so obviously didn’t know
his job, and so obviously wanted looking after by a
sensible chap. There being no mistress at the rectory
made him particularly vulnerable to the form of attack
which Dan called “helping around.” He had soon obtained
control of all the outside of the house and of the
parson’s boots as well.
This evening he used the last of the fading light for
planting bulbs—hyacinths and tulips, whose origin in the
borders of Place Farm might have distressed the rector
had he known of it. Then when it grew too dark to see
he went into the shed, and, lighting a candle, tinkered
away at the henhouse he was making. He had decided
that Mr. Marchbanks was going to keep fowls, and had
arranged with the chicken boy at Upper Barndean to
supply him with one or two good pullets for a start.
At eight o’clock he stopped work, put away his tools,
locked up the shed and went quietly off. It was now very
cold indeed. A snap of frost made the stars shiver above
the black ridges of the Downs, and Daniel walked quickly,
with his hands thrust deep into the pockets of his overcoat,
and his collar turned up to his red ears. It was
bad luck never having quite enough clothes to keep you
warm.... However, it would be warm enough at the
Crown. Ernley always had a good fire, and often a good
drink of something hot as well.
The bar of the Crown was altogether a superior affair
to the bar of the George. The sawdust on the floor was
thicker, the windows were covered with cosy, bright red
curtains, and there were one or two comfortable chairs
about. Moreover, behind the counter stood pleasant
Maudie Harman, with her slow, pretty ways and welcoming
smile.
“Good evening, Mr. Sheather,” she greeted him.
“It’s some days since you’ve been in.”
“Good evening, Miss Harman. How are you? And
how’s auntie and your sister Jess?”
“Oh, we’re all fine. Jess is looking after Doctor
Penny’s children now. She gets six bob a week and
her dinner.”
“Say, that’s good! I bet your auntie’s pleased, with
the two of you doing so well.”
“Oh, she’s pleased inside, I reckon, though she don’t
say much out, ’cept that we’re hussies, for we both
bought lace collars last week.”
“And uncommon smart you look in them. I saw them
in church on Sunday.”
“Well, I tell auntie that we must dress a bit, seeing
as everybody knows us.... Yes, Mr. Luck, two sherries
in a minute.”
She hastily took her elbows off the counter and
became professional. Dan saw that James Munk had
come into the bar.
“Evening,” he said glumly. “Is Ernley in?”
He hated James Munk for a variety of reasons, the
chief one of which was that he wielded a weapon against
which Daniel Sheather, like most of his class, stood helpless—the
weapon of sarcasm. He never knew whether
or not the landlord of the Crown was “getting at him”;
his simplest remarks were full of danger, his praise was
barbed, his blame two-edged. Dan in his presence became
a mumbling oaf.
“Evening,” repeated Munk, in tones of courtesy.
“Ernley is in his room.”
“Well, I’d better go upstairs.”
“Yes, I think that would be the best way to get
there.”
Munk did not like having the young Sheathers in his
bar; his comfort was that they never stayed there long.
Daniel was now half-way up the stairs, stumbling in the
darkness, and wondering exactly where he had been
stung. The Crown people were almost like gentry with
their talk and their ways. The queer thing was that
he didn’t in the least mind old Ernley’s imitation of a
gentleman, though he hated his father’s.
He knocked at Ernley’s door. It was merely a consoling
fiction of Tom Sheather’s that James and his son
had to sit in the kitchen because their parlour was let to
visitors. It was often so let, it is true, but Ernley
would never have sat in it. He had a room of his own,
a long, low, comfortable room that ran along the frontage
of the Crown, and looked out over its sign at the
village street. A bright wood fire burned luxuriously in
the grate, showing the thick carpet and comfortable
chairs, and Ernley’s bed with its warm quilt—lighting up
his pictures and dancing on the covers of his books.
“Hallo, Dan! That you?”
“Hallo, Ernley!”
Dan came in and sat down on the other side of the
fire.
“What’ll you have to drink?”
“Oh, I dunno.”
“May as well have the port out—you look cold.”
“It’s turned cold.”
Ernley fetched a bottle and glasses out of the cupboard.
He was a tall, well-made, well-dressed young
man, with a dark complexion and queer, restless eyes.
He and Daniel had been in the same battalion of the
Sussex Regiment. They had joined up about the same
time, and they had been together in the second battle of
Ypres, where Ernley had been wounded and gassed.
Soon afterwards he had been given a commission, and
his way and Dan’s had parted, but their friendshi—psuperseding
a mere distrustful acquaintanceship—had remained.
There was a world of difference between them—difference
in birth, for Ernley’s mother at least had
been well-born; in education, for Ernley had been to
Lancing College and Daniel to the council school; and
in character, for Ernley had queer, dark, hidden ways
and moody adventures in which Dan could not share.
But the friendship stood firm, built on a double set of
memories—memories of childhood spent in the same
village, of games and jealousies and quests, and memories
of the black and ravaged soil of Flanders, of horrors and
dangers and terrors and squalors, lit up by queer gleams
of human laughter ... it was strange, thought Daniel,
that he should have remembered all the jokes he and
Ernley used to have together, about rats and dud crumps
and the corporal and plum-and-apple jam, and should
have forgotten all the rest—except at the distressed end
of sleep.... He did not think Ernley had forgotten so
much, and that was perhaps why he was often difficult
and mood-ridden, requiring the whole of his friend’s
toleration.
“Why didn’t you come yesterday?” asked Ernley.
“I was expecting you.”
“I went over to Brakey Bottom. Len was that done
over his pigs, and Em having a headache and all——”
“Which did you look after, Em or the pigs?”
“Both,” said Dan innocently. “I give Em her mixture,
seeing old Len’s in a terrification, and heated her a
brick, to draw it out of her feet; and as for the pigs, I
tell Len straight they’ve got pneumonia, and he may as
well kill ’em quick before they die.”
“Then there’s no use strafing you because you didn’t
come to me, but I wish you hadn’t quite so many people
to look after, or that you’d count me in as one of them.”
“I do count you in—not that you want looking after
as much as some.”
“But I do. That’s where you make a mistake—you
put too much stress on physical comfort. If a chap’s
got good boots you never think there’s anything more
he can want.”
“Well, you seem to have a lot besides boots. Howsumever,
Emley, you can’t say I haven’t done my bit
to help in other ways—it’s only that things being so
muddled up these times——”
“I know—I know. I’ll never forget, old chap, how
you worked through that awful business. By the way”—carelessly—“have
you seen her at all of late?”
“I saw her this afternoon.”
“The devil you did—and how is she?”
“Oh, she looked fine.”
“Oh—I say, do you think she’s heard anything about
me and Pearl?”
“I don’t think she has. Anyway, she didn’t speak
of it.”
There was a moment’s silence. Dan broke it first.
“Are you still so keen on Pearl?”
“Of course, I am. The affair’s only just starting.”
“And she on you?”
Ernley smiled reminiscently. “She seems willing
enough.”
“Going to see her again soon?”
“I’m taking her to a thé-dansant in Eastbourne to-morrow.”
“Lor!” Dan was impressed by this aristocratic
wooing. Then he gulped a little, and turned red.
“Then you aren’t sweet on Belle any more, Ernley?”
“Good lord, man, no. I’ve cut that off clean. It’s
over and done with, thank God!”
He got up and took a turn across the room, passing
into the shadows beyond the firelight.
“She hasn’t sent a message—said anything to you,
has she?” he asked, “because I tell you I’m through with
with it all. I’ve had enough of kissing and making it
up. I tell you it’s done with now. There’s no good her
trying to whistle me back again.”
“She ain’t trying, Ernley. She never spoke of you.
It’s only I’m thinking that if you’ve really stopped caring
and have got someone else, I—I’d have a shot at courting
her myself.”
Ernley suddenly stopped his pacing. He turned and
faced Daniel, but as he was still in the shadow, young
Sheather could not read his face.
“I’ve been sweet on her for months,” continued the
boy, “but I wouldn’t speak a word, seeing as you hadn’t
got properly shut of each other. It’s only when you
started courting Pearl I thought it really must be the
end.”
“It is the end. But you’re a fool, Daniel, if you
think Belle Shackford will have you.”
His voice came cruelly at Dan. Ernley could sometimes
speak like that—all fierce and cruel—but it was
better than being sarcastic.
“Why shouldn’t she have me?” asked Daniel, much
hurt. “I’ve got as much chance as anyone else,
haven’t I?”
“I’m sorry, old chap. I didn’t mean to be offensive.
What I meant to say is this—that we’re so different; it’s
hardly reasonable to expect a girl who’s liked me to like
you, and t’other way round. And anyhow, it’s only
three weeks since our break. You’re a much more cynical
fellow than I thought if you can expect any girl to
console herself so soon.”
“But that’s just it,” said Dan sagely. “It’s the
rebound. They’re more likely to take up with someone
else in the first month than afterwards. Look at
Mrs. Light, look at Letty Pilbeam—look at yourself,
Ernley.”
Ernley flushed.
“I’ve had a sickener. It’s a relief to turn to a girl
who’s not always tearing passion to tatters, who knows
how to keep cool, and doesn’t always want to get more
than she gives.”
“Come, Ernley, that ain’t fair on Belle. Reckon she
gave a lot. She ain’t the sort of girl for you, that’s all,
and I’m glad you’ve got a different. She couldn’t understand
your ways—she’d no notion of putting up with
you.”
“Thanks,” said Ernley.
“Well, reckon folks have always got to put up with
each other. I’m not saying there weren’t faults on both
sides. But I’m quite a different sort of chap—more comfortable
like—more easy going—you understand what I
mean. I’m as different from you as your Pearl is different
from her—and if you like the change I don’t see why she
shouldn’t.”
“Is there anything—anything in her manner to make
you think she’d take you?”
“Yes,” said Dan confidently, “there is.”
“Oh ... it’s easy-come easy-go, is it?”
“No, Ernley, you misjudge her. It’s simply as she’s
worn out, and I’m a comfortable chap. Reckon she don’t
want no more passions, just a homely sort of affair as
this ud be.”
“Are you able to marry her?”
“If she don’t mind putting up with the George, I
am. Dad and mum ud have her and welcome if she’d
help with the place—and though it ain’t fine, it won’t
be any worse than Batchelors’ these days. And maybe
some time we’ll do better—with Belle to help, mum
wouldn’t be so set against us having a tea-place and
apartments and all.”
“A damn fine life for her,” sneered Ernley.
“Well, leastways, I’ll be marrying her and treating
her proper.”
“Now don’t start getting at me. You know why I
couldn’t marry her—you know the way dad treats me—that
I haven’t a bean of my own, and my only hope is
to work round dad so that he takes me into the business.
If Belle ud have waited we could have done it some
day.”
“She’s not the sort as waits.”
“Evidently not.”
He came out of the shadows, and sat down opposite
Daniel beside the fire.
“I tell you, Dan, being in love is hell—it’s like having
your skin off—it’s damned—it’s—well, thank God, I’m
out of it, and you think twice before you go in.”
“Ain’t you in love with Pearl, then?”
“Not in that way—never again in that way—my God,
no!”
“Well, then, maybe I shan’t be in that way. I hope
not, I’m sure.”
He stuck out his legs to the fire, and stared into it,
silent and satisfied. He was glad he had told Ernley
about his feelings, for until then he had had an uneasy
suspicion that his friend still cared, and while there was
a chance of that he would not speak to Belle. But now
Ernley had practically said “go in and win”; he had
also implied: “You’ll be likelier and luckier to lose.”
Well, time would show that. Anyhow, Dan was not
afraid of love. He did not expect it to burn him up as
it had burnt up Belle and Ernley. He wasn’t such a combustible
sort of chap. Maybe some people would say
that what he felt wasn’t love at all. But it did well
enough for him, and he hoped it would do well enough
for Belle.
The clock in the tap-room below struck ten. Daniel
sprang out of his dream.
“Losh! I must be getting back. I promised dad
I’d be back by closing-time. It’s awkward for him if
there’s anyone drunk and won’t go. Mother won’t have
Chris chuck ’em out, and I ain’t so bad at it.”
He began buttoning up his coat.
“So you’re still wearing your army coat,” said Ernley.
“I thought it would have been done by now.”
“So it is—done in, as you might say. I’d meant to get
myself a new one this fall—seen it in Lewes—but mum
wanted parlour curtains, and reckon her old curtains were
worse than my old coat.”
“Would you like my British warm? Dad’s giving me
a new one this season.”
“Ernley, old chap, you don’t mean it!”
“Of course I do—it’s not new, but there’s a lot
of comfort in it yet, and if you like to have it, it’s
yours.”
“Would I like to have it?” asked Dan. “Oh, no, of
course not!”
He went home muffled in Ernley’s British warm. His
humility in receiving gifts was one of the things that
made their friendship delightful to both of them. But
some people thought Dan Sheather was too ready to
accept Ernley Munk’s cast-off possessions.
The next day broke as cold as the night had been. An
early frost had touched the Downs and given a faint bite
to their pale colours, and the sun that rose behind Mount
Caburn raked long orange beams across the Brooks.
Daniel was up before the sun, lighting the kitchen
fire. This was his daily task, as his mother did not care
these days for early rising, and the nondescript assistance
known as “the girl” did not arrive till eight o’clock.
So Daniel lit the fire, put the kettle on to boil, gave the
cat its breakfast and went out to feed the fowls and the
pony, by which time the house was astir, noisily shaking
itself into activity. First Tom Sheather came thundering
down the stairs, yelling after Daniel to ask if he’d
remembered to order the sherry, as if not he’d have to
drive into Lewes and fetch it; then Kitty Sheather shouted
to her husband that she wasn’t going to fold his night-shirt,
and he could come back and do it himself; and,
last of all, Chris Sheather came yawning and stretching
his supple limbs and laughing at Dan because his face
was dirty.
“And I’d like to know what yours ud be if you’d
been down raking out the fire instead of laying in bed
like a lady.”
“Well, Daniel, if you grudge helping me, I know
Chris will do it,” said his mother.
“I reckon he won’t. Nothing ull get Chris out of
bed before half-past seven. He’s Miss Flossie Fluff of
the Pinktights Theatre, I reckon.”
“D’you want to have your head punched?” asked
Christopher.
“Yes,” said Daniel. “You come on and do it.”
Two hours’ hard work on an empty stomach had not
improved his temper; besides, it always did him good to
knock Chris about.
But the battle was not to be. At the mere thought
of it Kitty Sheather threw her arms round her darling’s
neck and burst into tears. She would not let him fight
Dan any more than she had let him fight the Germans.
So Daniel had to sit down unrelieved, and eat his bread
and cold bacon to the accompaniment of his mother’s
scolding.
“Whew!” said his father, after breakfast, as he
followed him into the stable.
When the family “took sides,” it was always Dan
and Tom on one side and Chris and Kitty on the other,
though in his heart Dan would rather have had a different
alliance.
“I sometimes think,” continued Tom, “that I shall
have to leg it.”
“Leg it! What do you mean?”
“Beat it—sling my hook. I can’t stand being treated
like this.”
“But you aren’t treated like anything, dad. We all
have to mind mother. It’s I who got it in the neck this
morning.”
“Well, I don’t see why you should, for you’re as good
a boy as ever breathed.”
“I ain’t. And, anyways, it won’t help me much if
you clear out. It’ll be worse having to stick it alone.”
“But I shan’t have to watch you sitting there being
wigged for what ain’t your fault—me the master of my
own house and not able to say a word.”
“It’s because you’re scared.”
“That’s just it—I’m scared—scared in my own house;
and I won’t put up with it. I’m beginning to think I
was a fool to leave the sea.”
“The sea! But, father, you’ve left the sea almost a
lifetime ago. You’d never go back to it.”
“A lifetime! I like your cheek. Your lifetime, maybe,
but not a man’s, not mine. I’m only forty-six, and as
strong as a dromedary. I tell you I’m wasted here,
having to sit and listen to my boy being slated, when I’m
not being slated myself. I’m not master in my own
house.”
“And would you be master on board a ship?”
“No, I shouldn’t. But I shouldn’t have a woman over
me. It’s that what stings, having a woman ordering
you about all day. It ain’t right. God made man the
head of the woman. It says so in the Bible—and look
at me. Am I your mother’s head? And she promised to
obey me, too—and though she said it in French it’s just
as good as if she’d said it in English. I asked the
minister and he told me.”
“Father, I think you shouldn’t ought to speak so of
mother before me.”
“Well, I can’t help it. I must let out before someone
or I’ll bust. And it’s better than letting out before the
chaps in the bar. You’re a good boy, Daniel. I say,
what if you and me was to go away together and get a
sea job? Then you wouldn’t have to stick it alone—and
you’d like the sea, I know, for you’re handy as they make
’em.”
“Father! Have done, do!” Dan was aghast at such
treason.
“Well, and why not?”
“You should ought to be ashamed of yourself. How’s
poor mother to get on without us? and us leaving her in
debt to the brewers and all—and Chris no good, and no
woman ever fit to manage a pub. Father, you shouldn’t
ought to speak so. I’m ashamed of you.”
“Lor! you’ve got your mother’s own tongue. You
take after her in that way if you don’t in no other.
Reckon I’m to be pitied. Howsumever, I shan’t ask you
for any more sympathy.”
“Oh, father, I’m ready enough if it’s only sympathy
you’re wanting. But when you talk like that about going
away, all I can say is that it’s wicked.”
“Well, I won’t talk about it any more, since you
feel bad about it.”
“And you won’t do anything, neither?”
“Not I. What should I do now after twenty-five
years ashore? I was only joking, and wishing I hadn’t
been such a mortal fool as to—howsumever, you’d say
that was wicked too.”
Daniel had not remembered to order the sherry, so
most of the morning was spent in driving in to Lewes to
fetch it. Spot, the pony, was eighteen years old, and
the trap must have been about twice as old as that, so
the equipage lacked both speed and smartness. None the
less Dan enjoyed the jog-trot over the Valley road, past
Iford and Spring Barn and all the flat wildness of the
Brooks, even though at least fifty motor-cars must have
passed him and covered him with dust.
“Nearly got done in, Spot, that time—nearly sent
west the two of us. Yah, you brute—I’ve got your
number”—at the whisking rear of a Rolls-Royce—“road-hog,
that’s what you are, ain’t he, Spot?”
After some mutual impoliteness with the wine-merchant,
whose bill had not been paid, Dan brought
back the sherry, and took his stand in the bar. He
generally worked in the bar of mornings, to make up
for his evenings elsewhere. The mornings were comparatively
sedate—a stray labourer or two, or a tramp with
the price of a pint on him, and generally a lot of conversation.
Outside the Crown a comfortable couple of
gigs were drowsing, but the George’s patrons usually
came on foot, except at race time.
At last the clock struck two, sign of banishment or
liberation, according to one’s circumstances and point of
view. Dan came into the kitchen whistling, and buttoning
Ernley’s British warm up to his chin.
“Where you going now, Dan?” asked his mother.
“Over to Batchelors’. They asked me to tea.”
“And when ull you be back?”
“Not till closing time. I promised Len I’d have
supper with them.”
“Why, the boy’s never at home.”
“Well, mum—seeing as I’ve been on your jobs all
the morning——”
“Oh, yes, I know you grudge everything you do for
me.”
“But I don’t, mum. It’s only, as I’ve told you, I must
see my friends.”
“You were over at Batchelors’ yesterday.”
“Well ... say, is there anything you want me here
for this afternoon?”
“Nothing. I got Christopher to sit by me. He don’t
want any sweetheart but his mother.”
“He’s only a kid—not old enough for girls.”
“I don’t like girls,” said Chris.
“Well, you wait till you’ve cut your teeth.”
“Anyways, when I take a girl, I’ll take somebody
fresh, not another chap’s leavings.”
Once more Kitty Sheather saved her darling’s beauty;
but this time she would not have done it if she had not
run between them, for Dan was really angry.
“He’s a swine to speak so—and I’ll knock his head
off some time when he ain’t hiding behind your
petticoats.”
“Well, you chipped at him first—with your talk about
cutting teeth.”
“I don’t care what I said. He’s a swine to speak so.
I ain’t taking nobody’s leavings. I—I——”
Daniel spluttered.
“Whose coat are you wearing?” mocked Kitty.
“Isn’t that somebody’s leavings?”
“Well, seeing as ... well, mother, you’ve got no
call ... seeing as I bought your curtains ... leastways——”
His anger was turning to grief and was choking him.
He was only one against two this afternoon—his father
having gone for a “lay down” upstairs—and he could
not stand any more of it. He muttered something thick
and foolish and went out.
The air of the Down cooled him. His way to
Batchelors’ lay across Heighton Hill—first by the little
chalky path that wound up from the end of Bullockdean
Street, and then by the green faint track that crossed
the ridge into the wider valley of the Cuckmere. Before
him spread the curves and swells of the down-top, cut
into clear strips of colour by the plough—brown and gold
and delicate green, with the round eye of a dew-pond
looking up to the sailing clouds. Dan watched the birds
that came with flurrying, dipping wings across the bottoms,
and they seemed to join with the sailing clouds
and the spreading Down in giving him an impression of
freedom and vastness, which healed. Something like this
the sea would feel if he were on it ... for the first time
his father’s mad scheme had an attractive savour....
But, no—it was foolish to think of the sea; he was a
landsman born—besides he loved the land—and he loved
pre-eminently two who lived on land—his mother and
Belle Shackford. Neither of his loves seemed in a flourishing
way just then—his mother thought of no one but her
youngest boy, and he feared that Belle, in spite of what
he had said to Ernley last night, was turning to him only
because she wanted a contrast, wanted comfort.... Poor
Belle! But that didn’t make his loyalty any less. He
owed his mother service, even if she did not appreciate
it; and if all Belle wanted was comfort, then he owed
her that.
As he walked over the Down’s back, past the dew-pond
and Five Lords Bush, he wondered how many times
he had taken that way on Ernley’s errand. Often during
the summer and continually during the autumn he had
tramped to Batchelors’, to inquire, to explain, to reconcile.
He had carried notes in his pocket, and messages in his
head—he had had to bear the blame of Belle’s freezing,
with occasional rewards in the praise of her melting. He
had seen her angry, sorrowful, relenting, glad, tender,
obdurate, despairing. He knew all her moods, all the
changes in her voice, all the changes in her eyes. Surely
he had never known a woman so well; and yet with all
his knowledge he had come to love her—indeed, out of
knowledge and with knowledge had grown his love. He
had begun to love her before the autumn was well on its
way—that is some weeks before the final quarrel, which,
with one brief interval of reconciliation, had lasted over
two months. And now he was free—loosed by Ernley—to
go and see her on his own behalf. She had always a
kind welcome for him, and he felt this could not have
been unless she felt towards him pretty much as he had
guessed and said. He did not flatter himself that she
loved him as she had loved Ernley—but then he did not
expect that, would scarcely have wanted it. He had
felt the distant scorch of that fire, and he knew it
belonged to an order of things he did not understand.
Ernley was right—it was terrible to love like that.
Dan didn’t hold with the wickedness of it, and though he
had helped, he had always grieved. Love ought to be a
warm, friendly, comfortable thing—a glowing hearth,
not all the house on fire. Though of course, if you asked
him, he knew well enough all the wickedness was due to
that James Munk not letting them marry, and keeping
Ernley out of the business, so as he hadn’t a penny he
could call his own. If Ernley and Belle could have married
and settled down there wouldn’t have been all this
flare up. For he knew Belle, knew her sort, knew that
all the trouble was because she wasn’t a wife, and had
been made for nothing else. Of course Ernley was different—you
couldn’t say he was made for nothing but a
husband. Still, old Ernley would have settled down if
he’d been given a chance. Now it was too late—the
house of love was burnt, and those who had tried to keep
house in it wandered separately, searching for a roof.
Batchelors’ Hall stands in the flat waste of fields
between the Firle downland and the lower Dicker. It
looks down on the windings of the Cuckmere through a
ragged spinney, remains of the ancient state of trees
with which it was once surrounded. Some hundred years
ago Batchelors’ was still the Manor of the two Dickers,
but during the last century it had crumbled from manor
to farmhouse, as its estates waned from the holding of
two parishes to a few hundred acres of indifferent arable
and boggy grass.
To-day it stood unprosperous and untidy, a mere
tenant farm, beautiful perhaps to the inexperienced eye,
that can ignore fruitfulness run to waste as it feasts on
lichened walls, great roof bossed with stone-crop, and
those sharp, sinister gables of pre-Tudor imagining—but
tragic to those with knowledge to see it as it was, forlorn
and rotten, like one of the derelict trees beside the
Cuckmere.
To Daniel Sheather the most wonderful part of
Batchelors’ was its barn, flanking it on the west, and
indeed a very cathedral among barns. Its acre of roof
flowed red and golden over a hundred beams, supported
inside by wooden pillars that made aisles of its vastness.
It had the dim, sweet smells of an old church, and a
church’s queer lights and glooms—it had little warm
homely corners, and great arches and aisles and shafts of
drifting light, full of mysterious motes, that raked across
its darkness, and displayed like altars the piles of oats
and hay and linseed, the root-slicer and the straw-rope-twister
and other agricultural shrines.
Daniel would have liked always to meet Belle Shackford
in the barn, to talk to her there in the homeliness
and dimness of it, away from her family, away from her
home with its cheapness and decay. But instead he had
to see her in the sitting-room at Batchelors’, a room
crowded enormously with cheap, modern furniture, the
walls papered with a heavily striped black-and-white
paper trailed over with roses. The same paper was in
the dining-room, where they always had tea. The Shackfords
lived in what they called the “new part” of the
building—that is to say, a wing which had been added
disastrously in the Regency. Here they had high ceilings
and high windows with soaring sashes, instead of the
low-beamed ceilings and casement windows that were to
be found in the rest of the house. It was far too large
for them to inhabit the whole, so they left the old, the
essential Batchelors’, either empty or full of farmhouse
and family stores, and lived in the rooms best adapted to
the eldest Miss Shackford’s ideas on furniture and household
decoration.
The family consisted of a father, three daughters and
a son. Lucy was the eldest, a thin, smart girl, with a
mass of carefully, elaborately dressed hair. All the
Shackford girls had wonderful heads of hair, but Belle,
the next sister, wore hers in untidy, tumbling heaps, like
a stook of corn half-blown over by the wind. Indeed, it
must be confessed that the whole appearance of Belle
could have been described as untidy and tumbling. She
was a big, tall girl, extraordinarily well-developed for her
twenty years, with more pretensions to beauty than her
sisters, but fewer to elegance. Like all the Miss Shackfords
she was fond of clothes, and spent in finery most
of the little money that came her way; but she was reckless
in detail. Her skirts hung askew, her blouses gaped,
revealing camisoles and chemises in whose integrity the
pin had more share than the stitch. Daniel knew Belle’s
underclothes by sight in a way which embarrassed his
modest soul. The two other children were a rowdy girl
of fifteen and a sedate boy a year younger. They had
nothing in common except their teens and their derision
of those sop-headed males who came to court their
sisters.
Daniel approached the house with some diffidence,
being uncertain which member of the family he would
encounter first. Each would have a different attitude with
which to overwhelm him. Lucy would be ladylike and
superior, obviously comparing him to his disadvantage
with her own suitor, who was a chemist’s assistant in
Lewes. Nellie would make noisy fun of him; Tim would
make a more deadly sort of quiet fun, and Belle would
be just Belle—beautiful, blowsy, tragic, sweet and
utterly confounding.
As it happened, he met their father. Fred Shackford
was not a bad fellow, though all the neighbourhood said
he was a damn bad farmer. He seemed almost to encourage
Daniel’s courtship; perhaps because he saw that
though young Sheather was inferior to young Munk in
every point of position, education, breeding, air and
wealth, he was superior in the one point of intention.
His intentions were strictly honourable; in other words,
strictly practical. He had every intention of marrying
Belle and taking her away.
“Hullo! sir,” he cried cheerily from the doorstep.
“Come to tea with the girls? They’re just starting.”
Daniel came in, breathing hard.
The three Miss Shackfords and their brother were
sitting round the table in the dining-room with the black-and-white
striped wallpaper. Lucy sat at the head in
her best silk blouse, with her hair done a new way.
Belle sat on one side in her old woollen jersey, which
gaped to display sky-blue silk beneath, and her hair was
done in the old way. Daniel shook hands all round, even
with hateful Tim and Nellie, and sat down at the table,
squeezed between Fred Shackford and Belle.
The conversation was colourlessly polite. It consisted
chiefly of remarks about the weather and the pressing
of the visitor’s appetite. Dan felt as sop-headed as he
knew Tim and Nellie thought him. Belle always had this
effect upon him, reducing him by her odd, mixed pressure
of floppy beauty and keen tragedy to the likeness of a
deaf and dumb idiot. She did not have it so much when
they were alone; queerly enough he was never so overpoweringly
conscious of her when they were alone as
when he saw her in the midst of her family. It was when
Belle joined with the others in talking to him about the
weather, about the new sheep-dip they were going to try
this year, about the prices of hops and wheat, that he
found her utterly overwhelming. During the summer and
autumn they had had many interviews of terror and
intimacy, but these had never embarrassed him in the
same way as this light rattling of the conversational
counters round the family tea-table.
All the Shackford girls as well as Tim and their father
worked on the farm, and their rough, toil-worn hands
were in startling contrast with their silk blouses, lace
collars and elaborately dressed hair.
“I’m dreading the lambing,” said Lucy. “I know
what it means, with old Gadgett getting past his work
and all. I’ll have perhaps half a dozen lambs in the
kitchen. My, it’s a life!”
“I like lambs in the kitchen,” said Belle in her husky
voice. “Dear little mites, it’s a happiness to give them
their bottles.”
“I’ll remember that when the time comes,” said Lucy.
“I don’t say I shouldn’t like to see them sucking if I’d
time to enjoy it, but I haven’t, and that’s plain. There’s
nothing makes you care so little about animals as farming,”
she remarked, as a side-piece of conversation to
Dan.
“I reckon there ain’t,” was his lame reply.
“Oh, I dunno,” said Belle; “it isn’t the animals I
mind, it’s the work.”
“Animals mean work,” said Lucy, “especially when
you’re like us and can’t afford a decent shepherd’s pay.
We wouldn’t keep Gadgett another month if it wasn’t
that he takes eighteen bob a week, and all the young
chaps belong to the Agricultural Labourers’ Union, and
think they’ll work from nine till four, as if a farm was
the same as a factory——” She tossed her head to finish
the sentence.
“Len’s getting a bit down in the mouth over Brakey
Bottom,” ventured Dan.
“Oh, I don’t pity a man. I don’t see that there’s
any cause for a man to get low because he has to work
hard. But when it comes to girls, it’s a shame. Six
o’clock I got up yesterday, and in bed at eleven, and to-day
up at six again. I tell you my back’s aching. And
I want to go up to London next week and see my
feeonsay’s people. They live quite near Westbourne
Grove, and always take upper circle tickets when they
go to the theatre. Oh, I like London, I do.”
“I don’t,” said Belle, with a sidelong glance through
the window at the dark flow of the Down against the
sunset.
“Nor do I,” said Shackford, “if it’s going to fetch
my girls away to theatres. Always gadding these girls
are, Mr. Sheather; always after theatres and pictures
and shops. All except Belle, that’s to say”—remembering
his visitor’s Intentions—“she’s more fond of the
country like. But Lucy—she’s sometimes in to Eastbourne
twice a week for the shops.”
“And Belle, too, father,” said Lucy hotly; “she came
with me both these last times, and spent a shilling more
than I did. And she hasn’t any appearances to keep up
like I have—engaged to a young man in good circumstances.
I must dress up to my position.”
“Hold your tongue,” said her father.
The conversation was now showing signs of leaving
those rarefied levels on which Daniel could not breathe;
but just as he was almost beginning to enjoy it, Miss
Shackford swept it back on to the heights.
“If everyone’s finished,” she said icily, “I suggest we
all go into the drawing-room and listen to the gramophone.”
This adjournment was all according to the local rules
of courtship, and Daniel had no sense of frustration as he
and the Shackford family sat stiffly round the room on
the “tapestried suite,” while the ancient bell-mouth
gramophone gave forth such strains as “The Rag Time
Violin” and “Honolulu Lu.” The first stages of a
wooing were always conducted more or less in public,
and he knew that he had moved forward rather than
backward from those solitary meetings in the lane or on
the down, when he had pleaded with Belle as Ernley’s
advocate. The family acknowledged his pretensions by
thus surrounding him and entertaining him; he was a
suitor publicly proclaimed.
Neither was he conscious of any outrage done to the
old walls—to Batchelors’ dignity of casement and gable,
to the manorial memories of the ancient trees, nodding
now against the first stars—by the gimcrack of this new-style
farmhouse-parlour, its noisy colours and sounds.
His experience held nothing of the quiet old ways, of the
old oak and chintz, of the farmer’s daughters in ginghams
and sun bonnets. Those things he considered rather to
belong to the old folk of the cottages, to old Gadgett
and others like him, who had not moved with the times.
The Shackfords were essentially up-to-date, which did
not mean that they were better farmers than their forbears,
but that they had somehow brought into the mellow
sweetness and rotting dignity of Batchelors’ the air of
strayed townees. One might have imagined the old
house longing to spew them and their furniture out of its
venerable maw, in which they existed only as foreign,
fermenting substance.
Belle alone seemed to have a certain affinity with her
surroundings. It might have been because her love of
the Lights o’ Lewes, of cinemas and shops, was superficial
rather than essential, that she had never craved
for them except as means to an end, the end of love,
seeking her romance in the lighted mouths of picture-palaces
and under the dazzle of street lamps, as her
grandmothers had sought it in the dark mouths of lanes
and under the dazzle of the stars. Belle knew that love
was slow-footed in the lanes but swift on the pavements
in the light of the shops. It was up and down those
golden pavements of Lewes, under the hanging nimbus
of the town’s night, that she and Ernley Munk had first
met and hunted each other. But she had been glad when
the hunt passed out into the lanes and into the sheltered,
reedy places of the Cuckmere. And now, when the hunt
was over, when love had been caught and killed, she no
longer wanted to go back into the town—she still
preferred the quietness of the fields, the bareness of
the Downs, the darkness of the reedy places of the
Cuckmere.
To-night, when at last in a silence of the gramophone,
Daniel rose to make reluctant farewells, she surprised
him by offering to walk a part of the way home with
him up the Down. This was not a recognized part of the
courtship, and the freedom of the offer made him more
doubtful than hopeful of her favour. Her family were
surprised too, and not well pleased; they felt such forwardness
might drive the suitor away. Poor Belle had
always been too much given to freedoms.
“You’d never want to go out now—it’s growing
dark,” said Lucy.
“I’ve been stuck to the yard all day,” said Belle, “and
I want a stretch.”
She did not wait for out of doors to take it, but
stretched herself as she sat there on the piano stool,
spreading out her arms and throwing back her head, so
that her strong, round neck looked like the trunk of a
tree with the muscles at its base like roots in the earth,
and her hair like flying branches.
“Belle!” exclaimed Lucy, and sniggered.
She rose, still stretching, to her feet.
“Come on,” she said to Daniel. “If I go now I can
get a breath of air before it turns cold.”
Daniel made polite farewells all round, during which
Belle huddled into one of the men’s overcoats hanging in
the hall. Her hair was like a pale froth in the dusk as
they walked through the yard, and out into the farmhouse
lane which led towards the Down. Her face was dredged
of colour and her eyes no longer held the warm blue sky,
but the cold moon. Dan felt a little afraid of her, even
though he was alone. He wondered whether perhaps she
had come with him to give him a message for Ernley, to
ask him to carry once more in his unwilling head words
of submission and reconciliation. He had already carried
so many, and one more would make too many now.
But she did not speak of Ernley, though after a time
they fell into a desultory conversation. It struck him
that after all she might have come out with him only
because she was tired of the farm, tired of the yard with
its endless small toils, tired of the kitchen and the parlour
with their crowding and shrillness. She wanted quiet,
she wanted coolness, she wanted rest, she wanted room.
But she might have had these without his company ...
then perhaps after all she had favoured him by coming
with him. It seemed as if he, too, were a necessary
part of her refreshment. He felt his cheeks glow, and
he lost the thread of what she was saying—her voice
beside him in the twilight was a song without words.
They came to the foot of the steep chalky path which
ascends Firle and is known as the Bostal Way. Once
no doubt it was a track on the turf of the hillside, now
it was sunk deep, into a queer tunnel, which to-night was
all black and white with the cast of its own shadows and
the gleam of the chalk in the dusk. In the entrance of
it Belle paused.
“I won’t go any farther—I’ll turn back here.”
She wasn’t going to speak of Ernley after all. He
reproached himself for having lost any of the sweetness
of her company in doubts and surmises. If only she
would go a little farther with him and let him give himself
entirely to the joy of her presence.
“Come up with me to the top of the hill—don’t go
now.”
She shook her head, till her hair was like swimming
light.
“No; I must get back now. Lucy ull want me to
help with the supper—we have the men staying for it,
you know.”
She was turning to leave him without handshake or
formal farewell. Suddenly he knew he could not let her
go till he had tried her.
His hand shot out of the darkness and took hers.
He felt it warm and heavy in his—he pulled her to him
by it, and at first, taken by surprise, she came, then
began to hold back.
“Belle ... don’t ... I must.”
“No, Dan—oh, no——”
But he had pulled her to him and was holding her
against him. He did not dare kiss her, but his body
thrilled against hers, content merely to have it close, so
that their hearts beat together.
Then suddenly her breathing thickened into a sob, she
drooped towards him, seemed to melt into him, and the
next thing he knew was that his mouth was holding hers—melting
into it—the next that they had suddenly gone
separate ways, he uphill and she down.
All his way across the down, Dan shivered with that
kiss. It seemed to have given her to him, without promise,
without words. Or rather, it had given him to her—he
felt as if till now his courtship had been on wrong
lines, as if he had merely sought to win her, and now
instead he had given himself. He had given himself to
her in that kiss; he belonged to her now, whatever she
chose to do with him.
His emotional history was simple. He had never
been in love before. During the three years he was in
the army he had received a fair amount of attention from
girls; he had taken out girls, as his fellow soldiers took
them out, he had kissed them occasionally when they
seemed to expect it, but he had never felt deeply nor
roused deep feelings. He had also—partly from a good
disposition, and partly from practical commonsense—escaped
any of those sordid adventures which the war
brought into the experience of so many boys.
But now that kiss seemed to have reversed all his preconceived
ideas of courtship, those ideas of the wooing,
winning, possessing male. It had made him the servant
of love. He saw his life given to Belle, whether she
wanted his love or not. Hitherto he had rarely thought
of rejection, and if he had thought of it could not have
faced it. But that kiss had plunged him into an overwhelming
humility.
If he had not been so humble, he would have been
triumphant; for he could not think that Belle had not
had her full share in that pledge. He could not believe
that her lips had been casual or merely affectionate. It
was she who had caused their embrace, their motionless
contact, to flame into a kiss. Without her leading he
was not sure that he would have dared touch her lips—her
cheek, perhaps, but not her lips—the paradise of her
sad mouth.... In the depths of his humility there was
no room for triumph, but there was a dwelling-house for
hope.
As he walked over Heighton Hill, facing the last
gutter of sunset beyond the Ouse Valley, he thought of
Belle as many things. He thought of her as a white
owl, flying out of a barn, and drooping against him with
tired, ruffled feathers. He thought of her as the lost
pigeon he once had found and nursed into warmth between
his shirt and his breast. He thought of her as
the sea, far down at the mouth of the Ouse, beyond the
masts that rise from it like spears—the sea which was so
sweet and so rough, whose near shores were home and
whose far shores were adventure, who carried men’s
hopes to sure harbours or swallowed them up alive. He
thought of her as the quiet Down, ridged with the scars
of old battlefields and burying the dead in its heart. He
thought of her as an inn, which had given houseroom to
many before he came and whose last guest had been his
dearest friend.... He was not jealous of Ernley, any
more than a man is jealous of the guests who have been
before him at an inn. For he knew that he did not come
to Belle as the others had come, as even Ernley had come,
as a guest to be entertained, but as the host—to keep
the house.
He was glad that he was not going to stop at
Bullockdean, but had the extra miles over to Telscombe
and Brakey Bottom. He wanted to still his heart with
more breaths of the night air before he had to join in the
unrest of other lives. Belle ... Belle Shackford ... to
most men the lovely, tawdry, easy daughter of a failing
tenant-farmer, to Ernley Munk the fire that had laid
waste two years of his life, to Daniel a frightened owl, a
tired pigeon, a sweet and wild adventure, a friendly house.
The strange thing was that Daniel knew all about the
others, all that she had been to other men, and yet still
hoped for what she could be to him. He knew that he
wanted to be to her something that the others had never
been, so he was not afraid that she would be to him what
she had been to others.
Daniel generally had supper once a week at Brakey
Bottom. He was the representative of family intercourse,
for Tom Sheather was too busy with his own tangled
affairs to care to go much into the coil of his son’s, and
his wife disliked the long, shingly road that wound over
the barrenness of Bullock Down and Highdole to the final
desert of Brakey Bottom, while Chris and Len were
always quarrelling on the ever-fruitful subject of “What
did you do in the Great War?”
Dan, on the contrary, loved mixing himself up with
other people’s affairs, and was equally ready to help
Emmy with the housework or give Len advice about the
farm.
“Why don’t you shack out your fowls in the pond
stubble? It ud do them good, and save you a bob or
two in sharps.”
“That stubble ought to be ploughs by now,” Len
would mourn.
“So it ought. But the point is that it ain’t. It’s
stubble. And while it’s stubble you may as well shack
your fowls in it.”
“What I want is a steam-plough. No wonder I’m
all behind, with the little toy I’ve got—and the share for
ever turning against the stones. It’s all stones, this
farm; this is the sort of thing they give us ex-service
men, and expect us to build a new world out of it.
Stones. You could scarcely grow mustard and cress on
the Brow fallow, and I can’t get decent machinery. The
prices are wicked, and I don’t care to pay ’em into the
pockets of greasy mechanics getting ten quid a week.”
“If I was you, I’d do more with stock than grain.
The ground isn’t good around here, there’s no denying it—but
if you had a few beasts——”
“And what am I to do with stock? If I kept sheep
I’d have to get a shepherd, and I can’t afford his wages.
And as for cattle, the farmers have been losing hundreds
over cattle this year, thanks to government letting us
down. I’d start a milk-round if I was anywhere near a
road, but stuck out here——”
Dan would let him grumble on. Len had, in his
brother’s opinion, been born sorry for himself, and the
only thing that ever seemed to make him any happier
was a good long cuss. So he seldom tried to argue him
out of his troubles, though convinced in his own mind
that they were outweighed by his blessings in the shape
of wife and children, and though he found their recital
tremendously boring, especially this evening when his
heart was full of its own matters. He felt relieved when,
after having pessimistically considered the cows, shaken
their heads over the pigs, sighed over the oats, and given
up all hopes of the barley, they left Len’s dingy little
box of an “office” for the cheerful kitchen, with its
leaping fire, flowered window curtains, and the colour
and eyes of Emmy, as she sat in a rocking-chair trying to
force her daughter Ivy into a clean pinafore.
Emmy was a cheery, buxom, overflowing soul, with
warm-coloured cheeks and a mop of red hair. She gave
her brother-in-law a hearty kiss, and told him to hold Ivy
so that there might be some chance of her being properly
dressed before it was time for her to take her clothes off.
“Wriggling like a little worm, she is, and not fit to
be seen since she fell on that turkey’s egg—quite spoilt
the front of her dress.”
“And quite spoilt the egg,” said Len, heavily
sarcastic.
“Well, she couldn’t help it, poor mite, with those
turkeys laying all over the place as you might say. She
finds it and she says: ‘Here’s a beautiful egg, mumma,’
and brings it to me for a treat—and then she falls over
the dog’s chain and her father spanks her.”
“Poor Ivy!” said Dan. “What luck!”
“I don’ mind,” said Ivy.
She was a stolid child with a jammy countenance.
Neither of Len’s children could really be called attractive.
Ivy had her mother’s moon-face without her animation,
and Leslie had his father’s inheritance of the Le Couteur
features, with an added beadiness. But to Daniel they
were both charming—he thought them the prettiest, funniest
kids he had ever seen, just as he thought Emmy,
with her round face and peony cheeks, the prettiest
woman—prettier than Belle, though he loved Belle the
best. He took Ivy on his knee, and succeeded after a
struggle in tying her pinafore strings, while Leslie tugged
at his sleeve and whined for cigarette pictures. Then
after he had searched his pockets for four penn’orth of
bull’s-eyes he had bought that morning in Lewes, and
given two cigarette cards to the rapacious Leslie, they
settled down to a game of snakes and ladders while
supper was preparing—a game in which, after some
preliminary contempt, the father was persuaded to join,
and in which he forgot his woes with surprising
quickness.
“Now—come to supper, or the tea will be cold!”
summoned Emmy.
“One minute,” cried her husband. “I’ll have won
in two more throws, if I don’t get on to that damn snake
on the last square but one.”
“If you get on the snake you’re to stop the game—I
can’t wait while you go back.”
Unfortunately Len got on the snake, and the game of
snakes and ladders was added to his list of grievances.
“They shouldn’t have a snake so close to the end—it
isn’t fair, having to go back almost from the winning
post. Anyhow, I don’t think I approve of these games
with dice—teach the children to gamble, and we’ve got
enough of that already in the family.”
“Dad doesn’t gamble with dice,” said Daniel.
“No, he gambles with silly race horses he don’t know
anything about. I shouldn’t grumble if he was any
good at it, but he can’t even give a chap a tip that’s
worth having—I dropped half a quid over that Selling
Plater he told me to back last meeting. Mark my words,
Dan, he’ll have you all sold up some day or other—what
with his bets and his debts to his brewer. Or, he’ll have
his licence taken away for allowing betting on the
premises.”
“He don’t.”
“Yes, he does—I tell you; I’ve seen slips passed over
the counter.”
“Shush!”
“We’re all friends here; you shouldn’t let him do it,
Dan.”
“I’ve never seen it, and if I had I couldn’t stop it.”
“It’s all very well for you to take it so easy, but if
dad loses his licence and gets sold up, I tell you who
can’t do anything for him, and that’s me. It’s hard
enough to keep my own place going. I sometimes think
I’ll chuck it up and take up fishing.”
“Fishing!” cried Emmy and Dan together.
“Yes—I might go into partnership over a trawler if
I could put up the money. After all, we’ve got the sea
on both sides of the family. Have you ever thought you’d
like to go back to mother’s people and take up that sort
of life? Sometimes I think it wouldn’t be a bad idea
to hook it from this damn country and go back to
Sark.”
“Oh, Len!” cried Emmy. “You’d never.”
“Why not? Reckon we’d do better for ourselves over
there, and sometimes I think I’d sooner be there than
here. I can remember it a bit ... rocks, and fog-horns
for ever moaning ... can you remember it, Dan?”
“Not I! Leastways, I remember a lobster’s claw I
had to play with, if that’s remembering.”
“A lobster’s claw! What a thing to give a child,”
cried Emmy.
“I want a lobster’s claw,” said Ivy.
“I want a lobster’s claw,” shrieked Leslie, and the
conversation was swept into an orgy of scolding and
pacification.
It might not have struck anyone that Len’s and
Emmy’s household was a particularly good advertisement
for matrimony, but Daniel seldom left it without an
earnest desire to get married and have an Ivy and Leslie
of his own. At first this wish had been dim and general,
a cloud that might settle anywhere; but now it had
definitely fallen on Belle Shackford. He would like to
see Belle sitting at his supper-table when he came home
of an evening; he would like to see her undressing his
children as he had seen Emmy undress Ivy and Leslie
to-night. Of course, the domestic picture was a little
blurred by the fact that for the first years of married
life he and Belle would have to live at the George and
bear with its intrusions on their privacy and romance.
Still, they would have their own room—two rooms
perhaps, for there was seldom any call to house travellers
at night—which would seem all the more private and
their own because of the family and tavern life surging
outside. In his mind as he walked home was a picture
of candle light moving over low beams, Belle’s face
lifted into it, her hair streaming back into the darkness
of the bed as he stood looking down on her with the
candle in his hand.... It was a marvellously clear
picture, the only one his imagination held as yet of the
intimate joys of marriage, and it brought a strange fog
of tears into his eyes.
He reached home in time to persuade the mate and
master of a Newhaven trawler that it would be wisdom
to leave the bar before the carrier’s ’bus went town-wards
for the last time. Dan had a good persuasive way
with drunks and seldom had occasion to use more than
his tongue, though he was ready enough with hand and
knee when the situation really demanded it. “I never
saw anyone run out a chap more neat than Daniel
Sheather,” was the verdict of the ploughman of Upper
Barndean.
When he had helped his father tidy the place and lock
up he was free to go to bed. His bedroom was a primitive
matter, for of his own choice he still slept in his
childhood’s little room, hoping that the larger ones might
entice guests and raise the George from mere tavern
level. He slept under the droop of the George’s eaves—outside
a far view towards the Downs that make the Gate
of Lewes, inside a cot-bed, a chest of drawers with a jug
and basin upon it, and one or two hooks on the wall.
To-night there was nothing either outside or in to distract
him from his rapid business of undressing and
getting into bed. He had worked hard, he had walked
many miles, his lungs were full of the open air; so in
spite of the excitement thrilling at his heart he fell
quickly asleep. All that remained of that kiss at the
foot of the Bostal Way was a dim dream of candle light
moving over the ceiling of a low-raftered room.
The worst of having a secret is that, if you are of a
friendly, communicative nature, it never lets you rest till
you have told it to somebody, and then it is no longer
a secret. Daniel wanted badly both to tell his secret and
keep it, to eat his cake and have it. He nearly told his
mother when he unexpectedly met her going downstairs
the next morning—he had a queer feeling of treachery
towards her, as if she would have hated to see another
woman set up in the place she had never attempted to
fill.
He put his arms round her neck and kissed her.
“What’s the matter with you, Dan?”
“I dunno.”
“You’re like a great baby.”
“I’m only saying good morning.”
“That’s a new way for you to say it.”
“I’m sorry—I can’t help it, mum.”
He took away his arms from her and went out.
It was his “early day” at the Rectory. One of Mr.
Marchbanks’ many peculiarities as a clergyman was his
fondness for having services without any congregation.
Every morning the little rasping bell of Bullockdean
Church made a short clamour at seven, and the village
priest stood before the village altar while the village
yawned and pulled on its trousers and lit its fires.
Apparently the thing could not be done if Mr. Marchbanks
was quite alone, so three or four of the local youth
took turns to kneel beside him in the cold morning
shadows and answer for Bullockdean. By a process of
the survival of the fittest, three mornings out of the seven
had fallen to Daniel’s share. Afterwards he would have
breakfast at the Rectory and do one or two jobs about
the place before going home.
To-day he was a little flurried over his duties. In
church he stammered and gabbled and forgot his “piece”—and
at the Parsonage he burnt the boiled eggs, which,
as everybody knows, is an achievement usually beyond
the reach of the worst cook. The lady who “helped” at
the Rectory was often late, and Daniel was used to
cooking the breakfast as well as eating it. He was, as
he put it, “fond of messing about,” and certainly did not
as a rule produce a worse meal than Mrs. Ades herself.
But this morning he was demoralized, and not only
brought an incinerated breakfast to the table, but ate
it heedlessly, without comment or grimace. His friend
could see that something was on his mind and very near
his tongue.
“Mr. Marchbanks, have you ever been to Batchelors’
Hall?”
“No, never; but I’ve met Shackford on one or two
occasions.”
“Ever met the girls—Lucy and—er—Belle?”
“I met Belle once out walking with young Munk, and
he introduced me. But I haven’t seen her since.”
“Oh, then you’d ...” Dan’s cheeks and tongue
were burning. “I say....”
“Well?”
“What would you say if ... I mean, how would
you like to keep a pig?”
The clergyman looked startled. Was this the fruit
of Dan’s soul in travail?
“I shouldn’t like it at all.”
“I’d take care of him for you, and you could feed him
on scraps and waste ... or get a sow and mate her,
and we’d make money out of the litters.”
In spite of various efforts on Mr. Marchbanks’ side
and several temptations on his own he stuck to pigs till
the end of breakfast.
Even by then the “help” had not arrived, and Dan,
who could never quite see where a man’s work ended
and a woman’s began, proceeded to a frenzied washing
up and an unceremonious making of the priest’s bed by
pulling down the blankets. He was smoothing the quilt
over his handiwork when a ring came at the front door
bell.
Dan thundered downstairs to open it, and found Jess
Harman on the step with Dr. Penny’s twins in a push-cart
beside her.
“Hallo, Dan! I didn’t expect to see you.”
“Mrs. Ades hasn’t come, and I’m doing her work.”
Jess, who had as pleasant a smile as her sister
Maudie, grinned widely in derision.
“I reckon you are. I reckon you’ve smashed the
plates——”
“I haven’t!”
“And just pulled down the cover over the bed and
thought you’d made it.”
Dan blushed guiltily.
“And have you emptied the slops?”
“No.”
“D’you think they’ll empty themselves? Or d’you
expect the poor man to empty them? Go on—you’re a
fine housemaid.”
“Is it why you’ve called—to tell me that?” asked
Dan saucily.
“No—I’ve got a message for the rector from Mrs.
Penny. She says, ‘May she put off the carving class
from Tuesday to Wednesday as her cook wants to change
her night out?’—a verdible answer—‘yes’ or ‘no.’”
“I’ll give it,” said Dan, turning into the house, “and
then maybe you’ll come and help me with the work, since
you’re so smart.”
“And what’s to become of the kids? I’m hired to
look after them.”
“Bring them in, and we’ll find something to keep ’em
quiet. Let me help you with the pram.”
Jess wanted only a little persuasion, and the twins
were brought into the kitchen, while Dan went off to
the study with Mrs. Penny’s message.
“It’s ‘yes,’” he cried as he came back. “He says
she may go to hell if she likes.”
“I’m sure he never said anything of the kind.”
“Didn’t say it, but he meant it. He doesn’t care
when she has her old damn class.”
“Dan, what’s the matter with you? You’re getting
beyond yourself.”
It was his secret again, tormenting him in a new
way. It had already made him sentimental, then embarrassed,
now it made him uproarious. He took the
boy-twin out of his pram and tossed him up and down
in his strong arms.
“Daniel—a-done do—or I’ll go at once. You’ll hurt
him—he’s getting frightened.”
“Not he! He’s loving it.”
The entertainment certainly appeared successful.
Young Michael Penny yelled with delight, and his sister
Lois yelled with her lust for the same experience. Daniel
shouted with laughter and Jess scolded him at the top
of her voice. The Parsonage rang with noise—the scream
of children’s voices, the roar of a man’s, the scold of a
woman’s. In his study the parson put his fingers to his
ears and wondered why there were so many people in his
house and what they were doing.
At last the clamour subsided as the twins, tossed into
gratification and only just not into sickness, were given
the cat to play with, while Daniel and Jess turned to the
house’s need. Dan did not go out, as he had first intended—his
secret still tormented him, and he longed to
tell it to Jess. So he followed her about with brooms and
pails and dusters, submitting every now and then to
being told he was in the way and worse than the twins
for getting under her feet.
Daniel had known Jess Harman all her life, which was
a couple of years shorter than his. He and the two
Harmans had gone to school together and had shared
many secrets about frogs and toffee and the private life
of Jess and Maudie’s joint doll. Daniel had been jeered
at by the other boys and his elder brother Len for liking
to play with girls, but though in time he had realized his
own ignominy and withdrawn to more manly spheres, he
had always been fond of the sisters, and on their leaving
school the friendship had been resumed with the greater
self-consciousness of adolescence. Dan had actually
fancied himself in love with Maudie for a couple of months—that
was just after she had become barmaid at the
Crown and wore her hair in two great half-moons each
side of her face and was considered rather a smasher by
the local youth. He had never fancied himself in love
with Jess, whose career had been a lowlier one in pantries
and sculleries; but to-day he certainly did experience an
overwhelming desire to tell her about Belle Shackford.
“Jess,” he asked, “have you ever been in love?”
“Have you been following me round the house on
purpose to ask me that?”
“Yes—oh, Jess, I’m in love myself.”
She turned round and faced him, dust-pan in hand.
“You! Daniel Sheather! Who with?”
“Belle Shackford,” he said hoarsely.
“Well!”
Jess threw her hands in the air, unheeding of the
avalanche that descended from the dust-pan. “Well!”
“Well, why not?”
He was angry now. He had told his secret and
wished he hadn’t.
“Well, my boy—she’s been engaged to Ernley Munk
for two years—and anyhow she ain’t the girl for you.”
“How d’you mean?”
“She ain’t your sort. She’s fast. You want something
quieter.”
“She’s quiet enough for me.”
He thought of her for a moment as the pigeon in his
breast.
“She’s—oh, I don’t want to miscall her, Danny, for
I reckon she’s had her troubles; but you know she’s fast—you
know the things that have been said about her
as well as I do.”
“I don’t care.”
“But you don’t believe they ain’t true?”
“I don’t care if they’re true or not.”
“Then there’s some hope for you. If you’d said to
me that Belle was just like the female in ‘be thou hard
as ice and chaste as snow thou shalt not escape camomile,’
then I’d think you were just a poor loon that had
to be protected; but if you’re going into things with
your eyes open——”
“I am.”
“And how far have you gone?”
“No way at all.”
Since she was being so unsympathetic he would not
tell her about the kiss.
“Then don’t go any further.”
“I’ve gone too far to turn back.”
“You say you’ve gone no way at all and yet you’ve gone
too far to turn back. You are a loon, after all, Daniel.”
“There’s no good talking to you about it,” he said
sulkily. “I’m sorry I told you.”
She melted at once.
“Oh, don’t say that, Dan. I didn’t mean to be short
with you—but I was sorry to think of you.... Well,
never mind. I wish you happy, I’m sure, though I don’t
expect it.”
“Why not?”
“Because—well, I’ve told you before, and you didn’t
like it, so there’s no sense telling you again. Besides,
most likely, if she’s not the sort of girl for you, she’ll
see it herself and say ‘no.’ And don’t think I shan’t be
sorry for you, though I say it’ll be better if she does.
I’ve nothing against her myself, but I shouldn’t be acting
friendly if I didn’t tell you solemn that she’s not the girl
for you.”
“Then who is she the girl for?”
“Oh, a more dashing sort of chap—the kind that’ll
take her riding in the side-car of his motor-bike and give
her tea at an hotel in Eastbourne, and ull dance with her
sometimes, and buy her garters—a chap like Ernley Munk.
All the Shackford girls are like that—fond of pleasure—‘She
that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth,’ the
Bible says.”
“Now don’t start preaching.”
“I ain’t. But there’s no harm in you knowing what
the Bible says about Belle Shackford.”
“And about you too. You go to the pictures every
time you get a chance.”
“Which is about once a year. Howsumever, I don’t
say I shouldn’t go oftener if I could. Now, Daniel, you
and me had better stop quarrelling, and go down and see
if those kids haven’t baked theirselves in the oven or cut
theirselves open with the kitchen knives or otherways
lost me my place.”
At Batchelors’ Hall Belle Shackford lay on her bed. She
was tired. All the morning she had worked in the house
and in the yard, cooking and dusting, feeding and milking.
They were short-handed to-day, for her father had
gone early to Lewes for market, taking Tim with him,
and the day’s care had fallen entirely on the three girls
with the couple of elderly farm-hands. Belle did not as
a rule get tired easily, but to-day she was worn out—not
only in body but in mind. Her body ached with moving,
bending, stretching and turning, and her mind was sick
of pails and mops and brooms, of straw and milk and
snouts and beaks. She was done.
Her room was a tall, narrow slat in the “new part,”
partitioned off the hugeness of a Georgian best-bedroom,
and looking out into the tops of Batchelors’ trees. The
walls were bright with her clothes hung on them; she
had no cupboard, only here and there a bit of curtain,
from under which sprayed out the greens and mauves and
blues of her attire—crumpled muslins of summer’s wear,
frayed jerseys of this winter, bits of silk and lace in
want of mending—blouses hung by an armhole,
chemises hung by a shoulder-strap, knickers striding the
peg with dangling frills—hats like flowery nests and hats
like flaming wheels. She had a great many clothes—more
signs of them protruded in coloured tongues from
the three drawers of her washstand, where a silver-mounted
scent spray stood beside the cracked white
earthenware of her common use.
As she lay stretched full length on the bed, a woman’s
magazine crumpled under her body, her face hid in the
pillow, Belle knew why she was tired. She was tired as
a woman starved must always be tired. For more than
a month now she had gone hungry—and it seemed a
year.
She could not believe that it was only a month since
she had seen Ernley. His going was like a death, a loss
which time makes heavier rather than easier, for with
the days the emptiness grows. It is true that for the
last six months their friendship had been disruptive—he
had been moody, remorseful, doubtful—she had been
jealous, frantic and wearying. It had not been the kind of
affair she wanted, though it was with the man she wanted.
Perhaps that was the very reason why. It had been easy
enough to have these adventures with men whom she did
not want, men who were only the vessels of love, without
personality, without being, save in so far as they
brought her those rapturous dark moments which from
her first tasting them had been the immortal ichor of her
life. But Ernley had brought her something more—he
had brought her himself, and her quarrel with him had
been because he had not given her himself, but only
those moments which now, without himself, were not
enough.
When she had first met him and known that he would
never be like the others she had felt sure that he would
give her what he promised. His circumstances seemed
to point to settlement and quiet possession. But she was
soon to discover that his circumstances were treacherous
and that he was their slave. His father would not hear
of the marriage—he planned better things than Belle
Shackford for the Crown—and without his father Ernley
was penniless and tradeless, adrift in the great overcrowded
market of post-war England, with the poison he
had breathed in Flanders still infecting his body and his
mind. They must wait—for something, anything,
nothing—and at first Belle had been content, not knowing
how much of Ernley would remain ungiven. But the
content could not last—they both wanted too much of
each other—she reproached him for weakness, he accused
her of distrust—she was jealous of him so much away
from her, he resented her jealousy. There were
quarrels—- reconciliations—the stocky figure
of Daniel Sheather was seen tramping over the down
between Bullockdean and Batchelors’ Hall ... then
more Daniel, less Ernley ... more and more Daniel,
less and less Ernley ... and now all Daniel
and no Ernley.
She began to cry as she thought of Dan—pity melted
the ice of her grief. Poor Dan who was so sure of her,
when he ought to be sure of nothing but his own disappointment.
Did he really think she was so easily and
so quickly to be comforted? She was conscious of a
faint thrill of anger against him in the midst of her pity—anger
for his stupidity, for his groundless assurance,
as maddening in its way as Ernley’s groundless doubts,
for his imagining that she would ever deign to become
part of the household furniture of the George ... though,
after all, why not? People who were not good enough
for the Crown usually went to the George, so Dan was
only acting upon precedent. The Crown had turned poor,
penniless, lovely, careless Belle Shackford out of doors,
and it would not perhaps be so stupid of her to cross the
road to where the meaner inn stood open and lighted to
welcome her.
Dan might have been wise in rushing his courtship
into her first month of desolation. A few months later
he might have found her hardened, indifferent to shelter—and,
as he had dimly guessed, it was in his promise of
comfort and shelter that his hope lay. He was so different
from Ernley that nothing about him would ever
remind her of the lost days ... to be loved by him
would be like seeking forgetfulness in a new country—and
that was what she wanted more than everything—forgetfulness.
After all, he could give her much that
was sweet. She remembered his kiss at the foot of the
Bostal Way—the boy’s shy lips quickening against her
own. He would be a good lover, and he would give her,
besides, a tenderness, a protecting care, that Ernley had
never given.
But she wrenched her mind from the thought, not so
much out of her surviving love for Ernley as out of her
almost maternal compassion for Dan. Poor little soul!
Poor little presumptuous ass! She must not hurt him
by giving him love as hard cash in exchange for protection
and oblivion. She must not seek comfort at his
expense. She had no right to have given him that kiss—she
would have given it to any man who had been kind
to her, to any man who was young and comely and
tender-hearted—but he would never know that. He was
probably thrilling with it now. Poor baby!
Belle sat up on her bed and thrust back the hair from
her face. One piece of practical action lay before her
with the promise of such relief as practical action brings.
She must get rid of Daniel ... she must send him
marching—in common fairness. Though susceptible,
easy, careless of her own dignity, Belle was no devourer
of men. The men she had known hitherto had wanted
the same sort of things as herself, and she had felt no
special responsibility towards them. But here was a man
who wanted something different—or rather, who wanted
from her what she could give only to another man. She
could not bear to hurt him. She liked him. Belle liked
all men.
In spite of many sad experiences she still liked them—though
the manner of her liking had changed. When
she had known men only from books and hearsay she
had pictured them as strong, aloof, rather majestic
beings, on a plane above the frailties and reactions of her
femininity. The woman’s paper which her inert body
had crushed for the last hour was full of print and pictures
of strong, silent men in heather-mixture tweeds,
with jutting chins and bulldog pipes hanging from their
clenched teeth—pictures of masculine magnanimity,
honour, truthfulness and protection. And such till a very
few years ago she had imagined them, and had lived
through some bitter times while her idol was in process
of being shattered by experience. Yet out of the smash
there had risen a fresh reconstruction of the masculine
image—as of a being frail, erratic, sensitive, perverse,
unreliable, helpless, and as such calling for more of the
maternal quality of her love than any of those broken
idols of tweed and iron. It was out of this infinite pity,
bought of experience in exchange for respect, that she
resolved to send Daniel away.
Primed with this resolution, she went down to tea—a
twilight tea, for the Shackfords must be economical
with their lamps—a tea with the cloth a white stare in
the grey dimness of the room, and the cups and saucers
all soft spots and gleams, and the high, uncurtained
window a great pool of grey light.
Her father and brother were back, tired and hungry
and unsuccessful.
“Not a colt you could buy,” said Shackford, “except
at ruination price. We must hang on with Queen and
Swaddy a bit longer for the plough. They’ll take us
through another year, anyway.”
“I hate to see those poor old horses work,” said
Belle.
“But I tell you there was nothing we could buy—not
half a dozen possible colts in the market, and they all at
impossible prices. One of you girls should marry a
millionaire, and then we could buy a motor-plough and
do without horses.”
“Guess who we saw in Lewes to-day,” said Timothy
in his sedate, old-man’s voice.
“Edgar,” guessed Lucy, with a glance at her pearl-set
engagement ring.
“No, he wasn’t yours,” said Tim; “he was one of
Belle’s.”
“How ‘one of mine’?” cried Belle.
“Well, he was your last but one, Ernley Munk.”
“Oh!...”
“What was he doing?” asked Lucy.
“He was taking out his new girl,” said Tim owlishly.
“His new girl—you don’t mean to say he’s got a new
girl so quick?”
“Well, Belle’s got a new boy—why shouldn’t Ernley
Munk have a new girl?”
“I haven’t got a new boy,” cried Belle fiercely.
“Oh, no, of course not—my mistake—Daniel Sheather
comes to see me and Nell.”
“Now, don’t let’s have any of your sauce.”
“Sauce ... sauce?” queried Tim.
Belle half rose in her seat, then sat down again. She
saw the wisdom of agreeing with her adversary while
she was in the way of getting information out of him.
She wiped her mouth and tried to speak steadily.
“I can’t help Dan Sheather coming to see me—I don’t
encourage him. Did you see Ernley, father? Who had
he got?”
“I don’t know who she was, but she was a stepper—silk
stockings and fur coat and everything. They were
having lunch at the White Hart.”
“And he called her ‘Kid,’” said Timothy—“I heard
him.”
“Oh, I think he’s consoled himself right enough,”
said Shackford, feeling that the occasion might be helpful
in dispelling any surviving hankerings after her old
lover that might survive in his daughter’s breast.
“He was holding her foot between his under the
table—I saw him,” piped Tim.
“You seem to have seen and heard a lot,” snapped
Belle.
“I always do,” the child retorted blandly.
“Did you speak to him, dad? Did he tell you who
she was?”
“Yes; we had a word about the weather; and he introduced
me to Miss Pearl Jenner. He said he was taking
her down to Bullockdean in his side-car to spend the
evening.”
A gesture of defiance on Ernley’s part?
“Sounds as if they were going to get married,” said
Lucy.
“I don’t say they’ll get married—he never was the
chap for settling down. But you could see he was gone
on the girl. And my! she was a corker—you should have
seen her nails shine!”
Belle rose from the table. She felt sick—physically
sick with physical jealousy and physical humiliation.
The thought of Ernley entertaining that girl at the White
Hart ... it was at the White Hart that she and Ernley
had met and found paradise before they found it in the
dark, reedy places of the Cuckmere ... they used to
have lunch, with wine ... she felt the fierce, sweet
taste of the wine upon her lips, mixed with the taste of
cigarettes and Ernley’s kisses.... And now perhaps
this girl, this stepper, this smasher, in her fur coat and
silk stockings, with her silk ankle held between Ernley’s
under the table—this unknown female, better looking,
better dressed and better loved than Belle Shackford—perhaps
she now had that dry, sweet, smoky taste upon
her lips—cold, yet burning....
Belle was in the passage, tearing one of the milk and
manure smelling overcoats off the pegs, wrapping herself
in it and going out. She wanted air—breath—or she
would be ill. She walked quickly across the yard,
splashing recklessly into the pools that lay between the
cobblestones, though they gleamed their warning in the
light of the dusk. Her breast was seething with the
alchemy of love and hate. She had never felt it before—this
hate, this jealousy—shaking her, burning her.
She wanted to kill Ernley—she wanted to kill that
dim, mocking figure of the girl her mind had dressed up.
He was taking her home—to where he had never taken
Belle—to his own home, his fireside. He would marry
her—she would have him for ever—him, the real Ernley,
whom passion alone could not give ... she could not
bear it.... She was sobbing—screaming—she must go
in somewhere and hide her shame.
Halfway down the farm drive an old cowhouse stood
open and empty. Belle went blindly in and sank down
on the floor. Bowing herself into a hoop, she sobbed
and sobbed—first fearlessly and then with tears that
scalded her face and blinded her eyes and finally exhausted
her into motionless silence.
About an hour later, her mind bled of all thought
and her heart bled of all feeling, she walked feebly back
into the yard, huddling the overcoat round her and
shivering. She had only physical sensations left.
A lighted patch gleamed in the house, and suddenly
her sister Nellie filled it, calling from the doorway:
“Come on, Belle—come on. Where have you been?
Your young man says he can’t wait any longer.”
Her young man. Daniel Sheather.
Lucy stood in the passage.
“Here she is,” she called through the drawing-room
door—then to Belle. “Do take off that awful old coat.
What are you thinking of? You can’t go in like that.
It smells of cow-dung.”
Belle slid the coat from her shoulders and hung it up.
Then she went into the drawing-room. For a moment
she stood in the door, swaying a little on her muddy feet.
Her skirt was muddied at the hem and torn in two places,
and in taking off her coat she had pulled her jersey off
one shoulder, which gleamed large and golden in the
lamplight.
Daniel, who was sitting at the far end of the room,
sprang up and came towards her.
“Oh, Belle, I was so afraid you wouldn’t come in
before I had to go. I promised I’d be back early to-night—but
I had to come over to—to——”
The words poured out of him, then dried as he saw
her close. “Belle, dear, what’s the matter? Has anything
happened? Are you ill?”
“No, Dan, only—only ... I’ve been out walking,
and slipped in the dark.”
She tried to finish the sentence in everyday words
with an everyday voice, but though she managed the
words, the voice failed her. She said “slipped in the
dark” in the voice of a terrified child.
“My poor little Belle.”
His arms spread out maternally, and before she could
grow up again they were round her. He rocked her to
him, and in the sudden comfort of him her stiffness melted—her
body relaxed and her heart began to feel again. It
was at first a feeling of sheer dependence, of the huddling
love of a child against the parent’s breast; she thrust her
head into the warm hollow of his shoulder and shivered
like a child.
“Oh, Danny, save me—such dreadful thoughts ...
of Ernley ... help me to forget him. I never hated
him before ... I’m frightened. Oh, I can’t bear it
alone.”
“You shan’t bear it alone,” he murmured. “I’ll take
care of you, lovely one. I will, I will. You’ll be all mine
and I’ll take care of you—you’ll be all mine—won’t you,
Belle?”
She had forgotten the promise she had made to herself
and to him as she lay on her bed upstairs. That
ghastly hour of hatred and physical jealousy, turning for
the first time her tragedy into horror, seemed to have
mown down her life like a scythe. She was starting
afresh, in a bare field, unimpeded by old resolutions. All
she knew was that she must have comfort, tenderness
and protection, and that, surprisingly, little Dan Sheather
could give them to her. She knew that she must have
honour and truth to restore her self-respect and the
respect of her family, who had guessed her humiliation.
She knew that she must have some armour against
Ernley’s wounding, or, after a few more blows, he would
wound her to death.
“Danny,” she cried—“Danny, save me.”
He promised that he would, though he did not yet
know from what or from whom.
It had all happened as in her heart she had expected.
Her surrender had broken her life in two, and the fiery
city of her love for Ernley and the bleak wilderness of
its frustration lay beyond a gulf. She neither loved him
nor hated him, nor was she any longer jealous of the
girl who now had his kisses. She could face the prospect
of meeting him—perhaps meeting them both—in the
inevitable future. Neither had she, curiously enough,
any feelings of triumph or self-vindication towards him
or towards her family. She was not proud of her engagement
to Daniel Sheather any more than one is proud of
the bed on which one finds rest at the end of a weary
day.
At first she was conscious of little except relief and
peace. Those experiences which might have disquieted
her had now no power to shake the lethargy of her being.
The day after her promise Dan brought her over to
Bullockdean to show his parents. She saw the contempt
flickering in the younger brother’s eyes, she felt
the occasional sting of the mother’s tongue, but neither
could rouse her from her quiet leaning against Daniel.
She liked his father too, who had Daniel’s face, with
sea-blue eyes in it; there was nothing sharp nor contemptuous
about him, and she saw in him without
offence the naïve admiration of the male for her big
charms.
Of course, if she would consent to live at the George
and help with its management they could be married
almost at once—there was a room, probably a couple of
rooms, to spare, and she would be useful in the house
and in the bar, and so earn her keep. On the other hand,
if she refused, their marriage was as indefinite as hers
and Ernley’s had ever seemed; Daniel would have to hunt
the blue lion of the ex-service man—a job, and having
found it would have to contrive, perhaps for some years,
to make a living out of it himself before he attempted to
support her on it too.
He scarcely seemed to doubt that she would be
willing to live at the George, but she refused to make
any promises. If the past were cut off from her by a
gulf, the future was wrapped from her in a mist. It was
essential to her new-found calm that she should not try
to search it. If she had to think of the future, new doubts
and new cares would arise. To-day she could look out
unmoved from the shabby windows of the George’s bar
and see across the road the windows of the Crown behind
their snug red curtains. But could she feel sure
that she would always be able to do this? She would
never even ask herself the question. When the future
came she would face it, but till it came she would not
bring it any nearer, either with questions or with
promises.
“It’s too soon to think of marrying now. I want to
get used to—to this first, Daniel.”
He looked at her with his slow, spreading smile,
which became mixed with a little reproach when it
reached his eyes.
“Oh, Belle!... oh, dearie!”
“We haven’t been engaged a week, and before we
settle to get married we’ll have to think of ever so many
things. And I don’t want to think of anything just yet,
Daniel.”
Her voice trembled a little, and his compassion was
immediate.
“Very well, darling—then you shan’t. You shan’t
ever—I’ll do all the thinking for you. Not that I was
ever such a valiant chap for brains, but I can think of
ordinary things.”
She knew that this courtship was moving on lines
exactly opposite to the old one. Then she had been the
one anxious to marry, and Ernley the one contented to
drift. But probably the reasons had been the same—she
had wanted to marry Ernley for the same reason that
Daniel wanted to marry her—because she was not sure.
She knew that, in spite of her promises, Daniel was not
sure of her, and sometimes a dreadful compassion smote
her. He was so sweet, so kind, so innocent, she must
never make him the victim of her needs, she must never
let him suffer because of her. Whatever she felt, whatever
her awakening, he must not be hurt. She had sacrificed
him once to her own urgencies, and it was her task
to see that she did not sacrifice him again—though she
realized vaguely that he was the kind of man whom
women will always sacrifice, either to themselves or to
other men.
In spite of occasional qualms, those days of late
February were happy enough. Belle found Dan’s lovemaking
a sweeter experience than she had expected—she
had expected to find him common and unpractised,
challenging contrast with Ernley every hour; she had
expected to find herself a cold slag-heap of burnt-out
emotions. She was surprised to find that the spark in
her was not dead, and that the word and touch of love
had power to fan it once more into flame. She saw that
Daniel would be able to give her what other men besides
Ernley had given, the things which do not really matter
and yet are so sweet. He could give her the exquisite
moments she loved, and because he was not Ernley, she
could forget herself in these, and be happy, and not wish
for anything more that he could not give.
Hence she was, in a manner of speaking, happier than
in the days of her love for Ernley. Dan was a much more
restful lover—though he showed occasionally an ardour
that surprised her, there was really as much of affection
as of passion in his wooing. It delighted him to cherish
her, to button her coat and tie her scarf, to rub her hands
when they were cold.... And she, in the new joy of
being looked after, could forgive him much that sometimes
jarred—ways that weren’t the ways of Ernley,
the ways of the Crown, but the common ways of the
George, reminding her that she was stooping to her
refuge....
Of course Ted Shackford was only a tenant farmer,
and his daughters worked hard in house and barn—but
they wore silk, and when their young men took them out
they expected the best seats at the pictures and to be fed
at hotels and cafés. Ernley had been an especial adept
at this taking out. In the side-car of his motor-cycle
Belle had ridden like a queen—to hotels and theatres and
picture palaces, in Eastbourne, Lewes, Newhaven and
Brighton. She had driven home with great beribboned
chocolate boxes on her knees, or bunches of expensive
flowers. Her sisters and friends had envied her. They
did not envy her now, though they thought Dan was well
enough in his way, and were glad that Belle should marry
respectably before she came a cropper.
Daniel never took her anywhere except upon the broad
back of the down, to the hollows by White Lion pond,
or to the five haystacks standing against the sky beyond
Barndean. Here they would sit on his spread coat,
huddling together for warmth, he kissing and fondling
her, smoking innumerable Woodbines, and talking plain
country talk of birds and animals and paths and people.
Nearly all their lovemaking took place out of doors.
Neither Batchelors’ nor the George was quite congenial.
If it had not been so cold, Belle would have asked for
nothing better. As it was, she sometimes wondered why
he never suggested a picture palace.
Beyond his family she had so far met none of his
friends in Bullockdean. She shrank from meeting people
whom she knew thought no good of her. The Harmans,
the Pilbeams, the Ponts, everybody, thought of poor
Belle Shackford as trash. If socially she was stooping to
Daniel, in every other way he was stooping to her. She
was a girl of no character, the clack of two parishes,
chiefly, but not only, in connexion with young Munk.
She knew that some people said she was a bad lot, and
most that she was no better than she should be. She
didn’t try to justify herself against these criticisms, but
she sometimes wondered if the women who judged her
could ever have felt as she felt, or surely they would have
understood. Were there women who went through life
cold, calm and sedate, unmoved, untempted, unshaken?
She wondered.
Circumstances had combined to prevent a meeting between
her and Ernley. Almost directly she had given
her promise to Dan, Ernley had gone off to visit an uncle
in Streatham. Belle had at first wondered if this were
mere circumstance, but Daniel had assured her that old
Ernley had been planning this visit for weeks, and he had
expected him to make it just about now.
“You wouldn’t mind meeting old Ernley again—would
you, Belle?”
“No, of course not.”
She spoke the truth. Her calm still remained unbroken;
indeed it was growing, thickening in the comfortable
atmosphere of Dan’s affection. She was a more
placid creature than she had ever been before.
Directly Ernley came back to the Crown, Daniel put
him the same question.
“You won’t mind meeting Belle again, will you,
Ernley?”
“Of course not, you silly fool. Why the devil should
I now?”
“Oh, no, of course not. I was only asking. I was
thinking of having Belle over to spend a night or two
next week. Maybe you could come to supper.”
“I’d be pleased. Why should you think I’d mind
meeting her? Does she mind meeting me?”
“Oh, dear, no. She said she’d be glad.”
“That’s all right, then. The past’s forgotten, the
hatchet’s buried. Have a drink.”
Dan felt infinitely relieved. Having seen so much of
Belle and Ernley in the last destructive days of their love,
he had found it difficult to believe that they could ever
meet like ordinary human beings—though each had found,
as they say, consolation elsewhere.
“How are you getting on with Pearl?” he asked.
“Oh, fine. Couldn’t be better. We had a day
together in town while I was at Streatham.”
“Are you going to marry her?”
Ernley flushed.
“How can I tell? It depends on what dad thinks of
it. He’s seen her once—I brought her over here—and
he likes her. But I dunno. I don’t think I’m the sort of
chap to get married. Not but that I’m sure to do it
some day. I’ll make a damn bad husband to some poor
girl.”
“That’s what you say. I don’t think so.”
“Because you don’t know half what a moody, broody
sort of devil I am. I hate domestic life too—cookery
books and babies and all that. You love that sort of
thing, so you’re wise to get married. When is it to be?”
“I dunno. We haven’t settled yet. It all depends
whether Belle ull live at the George.”
“You never thought of having her to live at the
George?”
“Well, where else are we to live? If I have to leave
home and get a job we can’t get married for years.”
“But you couldn’t have her at the George. It ud be
impossible. She’d never cotton to that kind of life—all
mixed up with your family.”
“Well, she’s lived all mixed up with her own, and
they not so good as mine. And if you’d married her she’d
have lived all mixed up with yours.”
“I’ve only got dad—and, Lord! it’s very different
here.... But I’d better not be offensive. Belle knows
how to look after herself—damn well she does! Not
much putting up with unnecessary evils about Belle.”
In spite of the professed readiness of the parties to meet
each other it was not till a fortnight later that the meeting
took place. First it had been obstructed by Ernley’s
wish to bring his new girl, who was not available during
the first week, and then by an unexpected reluctance on
the part of Belle.
“But, sweetheart Belle, you said you didn’t mind
meeting him.”
“And no more I do. Only I don’t want to just yet.”
“But you’ll have to do it some day—may as well do
it now.”
She held out her arms to him suddenly.
“Oh, Daniel, I’m so happy—don’t let me go.”
“Let you go, lovey? That I won’t!”
He took her in his arms, and she felt his warm, gentle
embrace drawing her close, till the throbbing of his heart
was under hers.
“Daniel—I want to stay where I am—not go further,
I mean. I’m so happy here.”
Her words were nothing to him but the echo of his
own happiness in their embrace.
“Sweetheart ... I’d like to hold you always. Belle,
my arms are round you always, even though you don’t
see ’em.”
She gave way about meeting Ernley. After all, she
must do so some time, and to feel herself, in spite of all,
unready, made her afraid—made her deny her own unwillingness
by acceptance. As for the added sharpness
of his bringing his new girl, that might make the dose
more efficacious—and she must get used to that too, as
much as to the other ... every day—all her life ...
only the road between them.
When the evening came and Daniel fetched her over
from Batchelors’ Hall, he was disappointed to find that
she was not looking her best. He too was inclined to
resent the inclusion of Ernley’s girl, and his aim was to
show her the woman she had supplanted as in every way
a finer woman than herself. But for the last two or three
days Belle had looked tired and off colour—her brightness
seemed to have faded, her bigness seemed to have
sagged, and Daniel, who admired brightness and bigness,
was sorry, not for his own sake, but for hers.
Possibly, to a taste less naïve than his, Belle was
improved by her paler looks. The ebbing of her brave
colour seemed to have left her features more delicately
graven, and the dimming of her eyes had given them a
provoking shadowed look. She wore a yellow frock the
colour of her hair.
“Your body’s undone at the back,” was Kitty
Sheather’s greeting to her future daughter-in-law.
Dan—who had reluctantly contemplated Belle’s blue
silk camisole on every occasion of precedence due to a
lady—but had been too shy to admit it—felt relieved at
his mother’s remark, though he could have wished it
made more graciously.
Belle grabbed at her back, pulling her bodice, which
straightway burst on the shoulder. Kitty giggled, and
it seemed to Dan as if his darling’s blue eyes swam a
little. His mother didn’t offer to help her, and moved by
tenderness, he was no longer shy.
“Let me help you fasten up.”
He was just going to embark for the first time on the
pathetic masculine struggle with hook and eye when
Kitty indignantly pushed him aside.
“How dare you! I always think you a modest boy.
I won’t have such things in my house. No!”
She had Belle tidy only just as the others arrived.
They came in looking, perhaps by contrast, the picture
of orderliness and ease. Ernley wore a blue lounge suit
that made Daniel, also in a blue lounge suit, lose faith
in the gent’s outfitters who had provided it. Ernley’s
girl, Miss Jenner, was hall-marked Eastbourne, and evidently
made Belle feel the same as Ernley had made Dan—though
personally he didn’t think much of her plain
black frock and little black hat in comparison with Belle’s
yellow finery.
Supper was laid in the parlour at the back of the bar.
It was a very superior supper, almost dinner in fact, with
a couple of fowls and a treacle sponge. The drinks had
been surreptitiously bought at the Crown, Tom having
decided at the last moment that his bondmaster’s ale was
not good enough for his guests. Dan, who had made
the purchase under a vow of secrecy from Maudie Harman,
suspected that Ernley guessed what had happened.
He knew that the George was tied to Messrs. Hobday
and Hitch, and that Messrs. Bass’s Number One was not
to be found locally except in the cellars of the Crown.
In vain Dan laboured to keep the bottles out of sight....
Not that he minded old Ernley knowing, any more
than he minded him having a blue lounge suit that really
fitted him—but he did not want Miss Jenner to think
that Belle had fallen socially ... though, of course, she
had ... marrying the George after being engaged to
the Crown....
Dear lovely thing! As he watched her he thrilled
with pride and tenderness. She was beautiful—her dress
was beautiful—even though the bunch of silk flowers at
her waist was a little crushed and she was always pulling
them up and flouncing them out a bit. She had more
scent than Miss Jenner too—it came to him in generous
waves right across the table—whereas Miss Jenner’s only
rose faintly from beside him. He didn’t really like scent
much, still if girls used it he’d like Belle’s to be stronger
than anyone else’s ... and she’d made her nails shine
too, like the others—they were even brighter—though
her hands were very different, being large and work-worn
instead of small and white. Miss Jenner did not
have to work at all—nor did her father, she told them—he
was private, having retired some years ago from the
building trade.
The conversation on the whole lacked spirit. No one
knew whether Ernley and his girl were engaged, therefore
how far it was permissible to go in raillery, and
neither said anything by way of enlightenment. They
talked a little about the rates, about the need of remaking
the road on the east side of the valley, about a
recent meet of the Southdown Hunt at Beddingham, about
the new motor-’buses on the roads. Miss Jenner was
very polite to Belle, admired her dress, told her about a
very good shop for hats in Eastbourne and asked her if
she ever went to dance at the Grand Hotel. Belle, except
in answer to such questions, scarcely spoke, nor did she
eat much. She sat, heavy and lovely and silent, the lamp
drenching her in gold.
After supper they had a table for whist, that is to say
Kitty and Ernley played Christopher and Miss Jenner,
while Tom Sheather served in the bar. Dan and Belle
sat and watched the whist-players, side by side on the
sofa, he with his arm round her waist, as he was privileged
to sit in public now they were engaged.
“That’s a fine girl Munk has got,” said Chris, when
the guests had departed and Belle had gone to help
Kitty wash up in the scullery.
“Not so bad,” said Tom Sheather.
Dan swelled in silence.
“A lot of style,” commented Chris.
“Oh, yes—a lot of style. But I don’t think she comes
up to our Belle.”
Chris said nothing—insultingly.
“You’ve got the best girl, Daniel,” continued his
father—“and I bet young Munk sees it. I could see him
staring at her all through supper. I expect he’s sorry
he changed—but I reckon Belle isn’t. Hey, Daniel?”
He smote his son between the shoulders, and Dan
felt loving and grateful towards him, though he still
wished the family differently grouped in its alliances.
Kitty also had something to say on the subject of
Munk’s girl.
“She’s quite a lady—you can see that. Never done
any work.”
“Ladies’ work,” said Dan sullenly. “Look at Mrs.
Penny. I’ve seen her washing her own curtains.”
Kitty sniffed.
“I dare say. I know Mrs. Penny’s sort of lady. A
real lady never put her hand to anything. Dr. le Hellé’s
wife in Guernsey she sit in her drawing-room all day,
and ring the bell if she drop her handkerchief. Give me
that sort of lady.”
“Well, don’t give her to me, that’s all.”
“Oh, indeed, Mister Impertinence! That is the way
you speak to your mother when she is going to sit in
the kitchen so that you and your young woman can sit in
the parlour. I have half a mind to go to bed, and then
you two cannot stay alone downstairs—no!”
“I’m sorry, mum. But I can’t bear to hear everybody
except dad getting at Belle.”
“Who’s been getting at her? Not I. I have nothing
to say against Belle if she will be a good girl. When I
spoke of a lady I did not speak of her for you. No lady
would marry a common boy.”
Holding his tongue with difficulty on the subject of
common boys, Dan walked out of the kitchen and into
the parlour, where he found Belle sitting under the
lamp.
“Are you tired, sweetheart?”
“A little—only a little.”
“You shouldn’t ought to have washed up. Why
didn’t you tell mother you were tired?”
Belle said nothing. She rose slowly and came towards
Daniel as he sat on the sofa. She put her arms about
him and hid her face in his shoulder.
“My lovely, my dear!” He strained her to his heart.
She did not want him to speak; she wanted just to
lie heavy against him, at rest in the homely comfort of
his arms; but his tongue, oiled by more generous liquor
than he was accustomed to, ran on.
“Oh, darling, it’s so lovely to think that I’ve got you
here with me at home to-night. That you’re not going
away. It’s almost like the time when I’ll have you here
always. Oh, say that time ull come soon.”
She did not speak, but he did not seem to want her
assurance in words but in kisses. He stooped his head
to hers as it lay on his breast, the bright rough gold all
teased over his shoulder. She found herself giving her
usual response, or, rather, her response coming from her
ungiven, feeling apart from will.
“If you can only put up with this place for a bit,” he
ran on, “I reckon it won’t be long before we get one of
our own. With you to help, I’m sure mother ud give
teas—and maybe let rooms, even. Then she wouldn’t
want any of the money that I earn, and we could put it
by. And I know dad ud help us if ever he got the chance.
It’s not much I’m offering you, Belle, but I do feel as I
could make you happy if you let me try.”
“I know you could, Danny—but——”
“Oh, say you’ll let me try. If you won’t come here,
reckon we can’t get married for months and years. And,
oh, lovely Belle, I want you so. I want you terrible—here,
as I have you now. I want you and me alone
together. Oh, Belle, say you’ll let me try.”
“And suppose you fail.”
She lifted her head from his shoulder and looked him
suddenly in the eyes.
“And suppose you fail.”
“Fail!”—he seemed startled by the new thought—“I
shan’t fail. I can’t fail. I love you too much. And,
Belle, you do love me—you’ve said you love me. Oh, you
still love me? Say it again.”
“I do love you, Danny dear. You know it, but——”
“Then why won’t you let me try? Why won’t you
marry me at Easter and come and live here? I know it’s
not what I should ought to be offering you, but it really
won’t be so bad. We’ll have a couple of rooms of our
own—and I’ll see as you don’t do anything but what a
lady ud be willing to put her hand to in her house. We’ll
keep quite private to ourselves a lot of the time. Oh,
Belle, you don’t have such an easy life at Batchelors’
that you need worry about coming here. This ull be a
rest to you after Batchelors’, and mother ull be good to
you, I swear she will. Her tongue’s sharp like that to
everyone—and dad he thinks no end of you and ull treat
you kinder than your own. And I—oh, lovely Belle, I’ll
be so good to you. I’ll stand between you and everything
that’s rough—I’ll take care of you as if you was
my child. Belle, you shall be my child and my queen if
only you’ll be my wife.”
The Crown’s ale had given him a new and surprising
eloquence. Belle was moved by it. She had never
before had him so fluent, so shaken. As she looked
into his pleading face it was almost as if its Saxon bluntness
of feature was lost in the brilliance of his brown,
French eyes. This was a Daniel of another, more fiery
race, stirred into life by the emotion of his love.
After all, he had only said what was true when he had
argued that she would, other considerations apart, be
happier at the George than at Batchelors’ Hall. Her
mother-in-law’s tongue would not be much sharper than
her sister Lucy’s—she liked kind Tom Sheather—she need
not see much of Ernley.... And she would have Dan
always with her—dear Dan!—who was so strong and
sturdy and comfortable, and so surprisingly, amazingly
sweet ... always with her ... never alone with her
fears ... too late for her doubts ... the future had
come upon her. She must meet it—surrender to it. She
could not turn and flee—she could not disappoint him, who
had already saved her from so much.
“Belle—let me try.”
She turned her face once more to his shoulder, and
gave her consent in silence, while his incoherent words
of gratitude stormed at her ears.
For the first half of the night Belle slept heavily,
according to her nature. But towards morning she began
to dream—queer confused dreams of the supper-table
and Ernley’s face.... She heard Ernley saying again
and again, “Let me try”—and awoke to remember it was
Daniel who had said it. She awoke in this way several
times, and at last could not fall asleep again. She lay
on her back staring at the ceiling, which seemed so near
after the ceiling of her room at Batchelors’ Hall. A
queer light hung over it—the starlight reflected in her
mirror and then cast upwards to the beams.
She must think now—she could not help it. She must
think of Daniel and Ernley—Daniel to whom she had
promised herself, and Ernley to whom she belonged. It
was dreadful; it was humbling to realize that in spite of
all that had happened, all that she had done to break
her chains, she still belonged to Ernley; yet such was the
situation as she saw it in the clearness of the wakeful
small hours. She saw, too, that her complete surrender
to Daniel, her promise to marry him at Easter, was almost
entirely due to her growing realization that her heart was
still Ernley’s. Twice she had known the full vitality of
her surviving love for Ernley—when she had heard he
loved another woman, and this last night; and each time
the knowledge had driven her a definite step towards
Daniel. But for the first she would never have become
engaged to him; but for the second she would not have
promised to marry him next month.
Was this fair to him? Of course it wasn’t; but she
really could not help it. The more she realized what she
had lost in Ernley the more imperative it became that
she must take what she could get in Daniel. The more
she realized the superiority of the Crown, the more her
only chance of happiness seemed to lie in her finding a
home at the George. If she had not got Daniel, she
would be down and out. She was not the sort of woman
who can say “the best or nothing”—she was not so
fortunate as that. She must have something, somebody
to fill a little of the emptiness which had come into her
life when she lost her only chance of the best.
Of course it wasn’t fair to Daniel. Poor Danny....
He loved her. She was quite sure of his devotion, and
tragically he was quite sure of hers. He had sometimes
been doubtful and deprecating before their engagement,
but ever since he had taken her surprisingly for granted.
Well, then, he had only himself to thank if he was made
the victim of her desperate need. After all, it was rather
cool of him to imagine that she would look at him after
Ernley—so soon after Ernley. He had changed his part
of vicarious wooer to that of actual wooer without
apparently one qualm of diffidence. It served him right
to be taken at his word instead of being sent packing,
as would have happened with most women. He
had offered her comfort and oblivion—she would take
them and let him face the consequences of his own
offering.
Probably the consequences would not be so very
serious. He was thick enough not to guess much that
would be passing in her mind; she could no doubt make
him happy enough—anyhow far happier than he would
be without her.... If only she could get rid of this
queer sense of kinship she had with Ernley ... a kinship
quite apart from breeding, education and manners—which
would still have existed if Ernley had been the
son of the George and Daniel the son of the Crown. It
was part of a feeling that Ernley’s life, opinions, happiness,
surroundings, mattered to her intensely, whereas
Dan’s did not. All that mattered to her about Dan was
his love, his kisses, his protection, all, in fact, of herself
that was in him.
These thoughts carried her through into the morning.
The window-square became a chilly, sullen blue—the outlines
of the furniture began to appear among clouds of
shadow. A photograph of Daniel, which he had given
her in the first week of their engagement, stood on the
little table by her bed, beside her candlestick. She had
brought it with her from Batchelors’ Hall, knowing that
he would be pleased at such a token of attachment. It
was not a good photograph—it was a portrait he had had
taken soon after he joined up in ’16. There he sat, looking
very stiff and upright, with his swagger-stick across
his knees, his eyes black and bolting under his service
cap, which was set at the conventionally rakish angle.
He seemed to stare at her through the gathering light....
What a typical little soldier he looked—just a little
ordinary swaddy—such as she had seen in thousands
marching through Lewes, singing “It’s a long, long
trail,” or “Sussex by the sea.” ... But she was a beast
to think of him like that—he was not an ordinary little
soldier; he was a kind, devoted, patient young lover
whose only crime lay in giving her more than she could
receive. Even if he knew what was passing in her mind
he would not reproach her—he would be humble enough
to take the crumbs of Ernley’s feast. All he wanted was,
indeed, to be of service—to be her dog. In taking from
him so much and giving him so little, she was not, all
things considered, using him so ill.
The next morning it was Dan’s turn to be Bullockdean
at the village altar, and having tried in vain to force an
extra day’s representation on Freddie Pont or Tommy
Pilbeam, he resolved not to disappoint Mr. Marchbanks,
but to sacrifice five minutes of Belle’s society. It was not
likely to be more, as he expected her to take advantage
of her absence from home, by having a good rest in bed.
But by seven o’clock Belle was tired of her thoughts and
of the hard places of the George’s best bed, so she rose,
dressed, and came downstairs into a silent and chilly
darkness.
The blinds were all down, for the Sheathers were not
at their best early risers, and this morning they were
tired after their dissipations. Belle opened the door,
which Daniel had left on the latch, and walked out. The
street was full of the pale March sunshine and the tossing
March wind. The signs of the George and the Crown
swung creakingly to and fro. Belle stared up at the
blind face of the Crown. The street was empty, the
village seemed asleep except for the columns of smoke
that the wind spun, scattering them every now and then
in wood-scented clouds that swept down from the roofs
and mixed with the pale sunshine in the street.
Belle knew where Daniel had gone and walked up the
church lane in hopes of meeting him. There were, in
spite of his simplicity, one or two things in him that she
could not understand. She wondered if he was religious—she
thought not, for he never spoke of it. But he was
a good boy, that she knew. He had always been good,
even during the difficult days of the war—and, unlike
many good people, he had always been kind.... Oh,
she must not let him suffer! He must never suffer because
of his sweetness, his generosity, his daring towards
her.
She had come to the churchyard gate and would not
go any farther. The lane had by now reached a level
above the rest of the village, and from where she stood
she was looking down on the Crown garden. It was a
fine big place, plentifully studded with arbours which in
summer would give shade to tea-drinking couples. Dan
wanted the George to “give teas,” and thought perhaps
it would do so when Belle was there to help. But there
wasn’t room for two inns of that sort in the same little village—the
George would simply smash once it went into
deliberate competition with the Crown. That was another
of Dan’s silly ideas. He ought to see that the George’s
only chance was to keep its own common ways—his
father had better sense than he.
A man had come out of a shed in the Crown garden
and was walking towards the house. She knew immediately,
by his figure and his walk, that he was Ernley.
Her breath thickened, and suddenly she felt almost faint
and clung to a stake in the hedgerow for support. Good
Lord! what was happening to her if she could not bear
even the distant sight of Ernley? Every effort she made
at her own reassurance seemed only to land her further
in doubt. What would become of her?
“Belle—darling! This is a fine surprise.”
Daniel had come through the gate while she stood
lost in her new weakness. He put his cold cheek to hers
and she found her usual comfort.
“Oh, Danny, I’m so glad to see you.”
“And I to see you, sweetheart. I never thought you’d
be out so early.
“I woke up early.”
“Didn’t you sleep well, dearie? Weren’t you comfortable?
I know most of our beds are full of lumps.”
“Oh, I was right enough. But I felt wide awake—and
I’m not used to lying long.”
“Belle, must you go home to-day? Can’t you stay
till to-morrow? I seem to have had so little of you.”
“I must go, I reckon. We’re short-handed as it is.
But you’ll be coming over soon.”
“I’ll walk over with you to-day—but I’d sooner have
you here.”
He stopped and drew her to him in the last shelter of
the lane.
As he released her he seemed to notice something.
“Darling, are you well? You’re looking terrible
pale.”
“Oh, I’m right enough.”
“But you shouldn’t ought to have come out like this
before breakfast, on an empty stomach.”
“And what about yours?”
“Oh, I’m used to it. I’m tough. But you—you just
about want someone to take care of you.”
He kissed her fiercely—without shelter.
“Oh, Danny—don’t. Not out here in the street.”
She had a sudden fear that Ernley would see.
“There ain’t nobody about.”
“But someone might be looking out of a window.”
He saw her eyes slant upwards to the windows of the
Crown.
“Don’t you worry about old Ernley. It ud do him
good to see us.”
She was seized with a strange fury at his insensitiveness.
Her heart beat wildly, and for the first time she
nearly gave him bitter words. But she managed to
force herself to silence, and they went into the George
together. Breakfast was laid in the kitchen—a substantial
meal, richly various for a man who could not
pay his brewer.
“Good morning, mum—good morning, dad. Here
we are—here’s Belle. Reckon she’s dying for her breakfast,
same as I am.”
Dan’s cheerful voice seemed to fill the room, or rather
to fill all of it that was not filled by the voices of Kitty
and Tom and Chris. Perversely, Belle herself felt unable
to speak a word. Having shut her mouth on bitterness,
she seemed unable to open it again for friendliness or
greeting. She sat down beside Dan at the table—sausages
appeared before her, bread and butter and a
great cup of tea.
“My, Belle! but you’re looking ornery!”
Tom Sheather’s voice came down the table, bellowing
... she saw Dan cutting more bread ... she felt just as
she had felt when she was watching Ernley in the Crown
garden ... almost faint ... quite faint. She went
suddenly in a huddle to the floor.
The next thing that she became conscious of was a
pair of eyes, looking down at her. They were dark eyes
like Daniel’s, yet not Daniel’s, and they seemed to be
boring down into hers, reading the inmost secrets of her
heart—secrets of which even she herself was unaware.
Then slowly a face surrounded them, and she realized
that she was lying with her head on Kitty Sheather’s
knee, looking up into her face.
She stirred uneasily, and moaned.
“Belle—Belle——”
The agonized voice came from beside her, and with a
slight roll of her head she looked into Daniel’s face,
convulsed and pitying.
“Oh, my darling—my poor darling!... Don’t be
frightened, sweet—you’re better now. Here’s dad with
some brandy.”
Tom Sheather held a flask to her lips. She drank it,
gulped and sat up. For a moment the room seemed to
go round, then steadied itself again. She gripped
Daniel’s arm and laughed weakly.
“I fainted.”
“You’re tired, my precious—you’ve been working too
hard, and you shouldn’t ought to have got up so early.
Now you shall go back to bed and stay there till you’re
rested.”
“No—I must go home.”
The words were out of her almost before she realized
her own urgency.
“But you can’t possibly—it ud be wicked for you to
go when you’re tired and ill like this.”
“I must go—I’m quite well now.”
She had scrambled to her feet, and stood swaying
and clutching him by the shoulder.
“Don’t be silly, my dear,” said Tom Sheather; “we’d
have it on our conscience if you went home to-day.”
“But I must—I must. I tell you I can’t stay.” Her
need seemed to grow in desperation every minute.
“Danny can drive me—you’ve got a trap. Please, please,
Danny, take me home.”
The clear voice of Kitty Sheather broke into the
discussion.
“Let her go if she want to—there’s nothing the
matter with her.”
“Oh, mum! How can you speak so? Look how
white she is. Is it natural for a girl to faint at her
breakfast?”
“Yes,” said Kitty coolly, “sometimes quite natural.”
Belle walked towards the door, waving back Daniel
when he tried to follow.
“You go and get out the trap. Please don’t come—please
don’t keep me.”
She managed to hold back her tears till she was out
of the room. She was aware of some sort of argument
going on behind the closed door, but Daniel did not come
out to her, as she had feared. No doubt his mother’s
notions of propriety forbade his helping her with her
packing. To her great relief, Kitty did not come either.
She was left alone. She felt quite well again now, but
she could not stop crying. Her tears fell on her clothes
as she folded them and put them in her bag. When
she had finished packing she had to wait a few minutes
till they had ceased.
At last she was ready and had come downstairs in
her coat of purple freize, with her sky-blue tam o’ shanter
crammed down over her hair, which she had not troubled
to brush out of its recent confusion. Dan was waiting
for her with the trap, miserable, but resigned. Her farewells
were said—defensively to Chris, gratefully to Tom,
nervously to Kitty—and she was up in the trap beside
Daniel, driving down Bullockdean street under the staring
windows of the Crown.
“How are you feeling, dear?” he asked her every
moment, and when they were out of the village he wanted
to put his arm round her. Almost without knowing what
she did, she pushed him away.
“Don’t, Danny, you mustn’t do that—you can’t drive
with only one arm. Please get me home quickly—quickly.”
When they came to Batchelors’ Hall, she would not
let him stay. He wanted to go indoors with her and
explain to her family that she was ill, and must rest.
But she would not let him. She gave him on the doorstep
an almost sacrificial kiss, and stood watching him
drive through the gate before she went in.
Daniel was bewildered, not only by the last hour but
by all the events of the morning. He was bewildered
by Belle’s illness, still more by his mother’s indifference
in the face of such a calamity, and most of all by Belle’s
new strange aloofness, refusing his comfort when most
she seemed to need it. As a rule, in her blooming health,
he had always found her eager to lean on him, but now
when she was ill, faint and tired, she seemed to turn
away. He was distressed.
These sad thoughts occupied him all the way home,
but when he reached the George they were immediately
dispelled, not by any comfort, but by a fresh piece of
catastrophe.
“What you think’s happened?” cried Kitty from the
open door as he drove up.
“I dunno—anything good?”
“Good! I shouldn’t call it good, but I never know
what you think.”
She was evidently more moved than by poor Belle’s
afflictions.
“Well, then, what is it, mum?”
“James Munk—old Munk—he’s dead.”
Daniel gaped.
“He was knocked down and killed in Lewes this morning,”
put in Tom Sheather over his wife’s shoulder. “A
car got him as he stepped off the pavement. This very
morning it was—he’s just been brought home.”
“And now Ernley have the Crown and get married
at once,” said Kitty.
Dan still found himself speechless. James Munk had
continually maddened him and scared him with his bitter
gifts of tongue—but to be dead ... to be swept suddenly
out of life in the familiar High Street of Lewes,
among all the traps and cars and people and driven
beasts ... he felt the back of his throat thicken with
the beginnings of a sob, and hastily whipping up Spot,
he drove round to the back yard, where he could be unmanly
if he wished.
All that day nothing else was talked of in Bullockdean.
Maudie Harman answered a continual stream of inquiries
in the bar, and by common consent almost nothing but
sherry was ordered, sherry being for some obscure reason
considered locally as the only suitable drink in the presence
of death.
Dan did not go over to the Crown. He did not know
what to say to Ernley. He did not know what Ernley
was feeling, whether he, too, felt all the pathos and horror
of death like that in Lewes Street, or whether he was
only thinking that now he was free, master of the Crown
and of himself, or perhaps wondering what would have
happened if his freedom had come earlier, when he was
still Belle Shackford’s lover.... He had never credited
Ernley with any strong feelings for his father, and he
knew he wasn’t the kind of man to speak as he didn’t
feel. He would not speak of James Munk in the way
Daniel was accustomed to hear speak of the dead, and
something in young Sheather’s country heart was shocked
at the idea, and would not let him go where there was a
chance of good ways being set at naught.
At the George there was also plenty of talk, but it
was in the right tradition. Neither Kitty nor Tom had
had a good word to say for Munk while he was alive,
but they had nothing but good to say of him now he was
dead.
“Poor chap!” said Tom. “I saw him drive away
soon after you did, Daniel—wearing his grey suit ...
it seems terrible, don’t it? I’d just come up from the
cellar with some of the stout, and I heard wheels and I
thought ‘that can’t be Dan come back—no, it’s from the
Crown’—and that very moment James Munk drove past
the winder.”
“Was Ernley with him?”
“No, he was alone; but he’d got a crate or something
at the back of the trap. If I’d known what was going
to happen, I’d have looked more particular.”
Tom sighed regretfully. The next minute he changed
the subject.
“But here we are in such a terrification about poor
Munk, who’s dead, that we’ve forgotten our Belle, who’s
living. I hope you left her feeling better, Daniel.”
“Yes, I think she was better, dad. She said she was—she
wouldn’t let me come in.”
“Well, I hope she won’t go working herself to death
at that place. That’s what’s the matter with her, you
mark my words. Shackford can’t afford a proper lot of
men, so he works his girls to death. Poor soul! It
made my heart bleed to see her looking so ordinary.”
“It was nothing,” said Kitty, “only a little morning
faintness.”
Something in her voice and in her look, as well as
something vaguely suggestive and familiar about her
words, made Daniel start and turn suddenly hot.
“What d’you mean, mum?”
“Only that I think you’ll soon have something more of
Ernley’s to take over.”
She was standing near the door, and went out as
she spoke. Dan remained, gaping at his father.
“Come, lad, don’t take on,” pleaded Tom. “Reckon
mum didn’t mean what she said.”
But Daniel was no longer there.
The news of James Munk’s death came to Batchelors’
Hall almost as quickly as it had come to Bullockdean.
Fred Shackford brought it back from Lewes, and had it
all ready to retail to his girls at dinner.
“He’d left his trap at the White Hart, and was just
going to cross the road to Mr. Vine’s shop, when, as
he stepped off the pavement, a car got him. A private
car it was, driven by a gentleman from Guildford. Lord!
they were upset—the lady in the back seat fainted right
away. No one was to blame, they say—car going quite
slow and on its proper side—only old Munk stepped off
without looking around. I didn’t see it happen—- didn’t
get up in time—but I saw some of the blood.”
“Was he alone?” asked Lucy. “Wasn’t Ernley with
him?”
“No, he was quite alone; but, of course, everyone
knew who he was. I heard it was Munk before I got
anywhere near.”
“Ernley ull be able to get married now.”
“So he will, and he’ll be a bit of a catch, too. I hear
the Crown’s worth something these days.”
“Mr. Munk wanted him to marry a lady. He thought
he could, with the education he’d given him, and he being
an officer in the war. I wonder if the girl he’s got now
is a lady?”
“She looked one. But by this time it don’t matter.
He can marry whom he chooses. Poor old Munk can’t
stop him.”
Belle said nothing till dinner was over, then she went
up to her room. She did not cry or make any sound, but
in her heart was a twisting, strangling despair.
Ernley was free. He could marry anybody he chose.
He could marry Pearl Jenner in her refined black frock,
with her Eastbourne accent and her private father. He
could have married Belle if only James Munk had died a
little earlier, or if only she had been patient a little longer.
He had always meant to marry her some day, either when
he had found a job or his father had relented. Belle
had told herself—and, unfortunately, him—that if he
really loved her he would not wait, but would marry her
at once, and they would face poverty together. He had
assured her in return that he did love her, but that for
her own sake as well as his he would not marry her
without maintenance or independence. She had not believed
him, and they had quarrelled—many times—and
been reconciled—many times. And now, after the last
quarrel, she had refused reconciliation, and instead had
pledged herself to a man who was ready to marry her
without maintenance or independence. Whereas, if she
had waited only a few more weeks she could have had
Ernley and both.
That was the sort of trick you had played on you
when you were bad. Maybe if she had been good all this
would never have happened. Good people would say she
had got what she deserved. Perhaps they were right.
After all, she ought to have understood.... Men don’t
love women the way women love men. Ernley had not
wanted of her all that she wanted of him, so he had been
happy and satisfied without marriage. He had been
happy because he did not want so much. She had made
too many demands on him ... she had been like the
daughter of the horseleech saying, “give—give.” She
had said: “It isn’t enough that you’ve given me your
friendship and so much joy—I want everything you’ve
got: your home, your family, your daily life, your leisure.
Give—give!”
She had asked for so much that she had got nothing.
She saw that she hadn’t got even Daniel now. She could
not marry Daniel now that she knew she carried Ernley’s
child. To her spirit’s long recoil had now been added the
recoil of the flesh—and the thing was impossible. She
carried Ernley himself in her body. She could not give
even so much as her body to Daniel.
She felt neither joy nor sorrow, only a deadly fear.
It seemed a long time now that she had felt this fear,
but it had been only faint, half-realized, a vague sickness.
Now it had shape and name. Kitty Sheather’s boring
eyes had given it both. She knew now what for long
she had suspected, and she knew, too, that her suspicions
had been more vigorous than she would acknowledge at
the time. She had thrust them from her with hasty reassurances,
born of ignorance out of desperation. But
they, more than any bodily condition, had been responsible
for her ill-health, and now that they were no longer thrust
aside, but an admitted part of her stress, she felt curiously
well. It was her bodily health alone that enabled her to
face the future. Her mind was sick. She saw herself
friendless, kicked out by her family, and bound by all
the strange contrariety of nature to refuse the only help
that could come to her, from Daniel. She saw herself
exposed and forsaken ... she saw her love for Ernley
made immortal, looking up at her with undying eyes of
torment.
She was in the midst of these thoughts, sitting on
her bed, when Lucy stuck her head in at the door, saying:
“Daniel’s come.”
Well, that did not really make it any worse; on the
contrary, the sooner she was through with it all the
better. She rose, and without troubling about her appearance,
went downstairs. He was in the drawing-room,
comparing details of the Munk tragedy with her father.
She was anxious to get him away, but Shackford was
full of the garrulity of almost-an-eye-witness, and it was
some time before he had done with the relative positions
of the White Hart and the car and the body and Mr.
Vine’s shop. Daniel seemed anxious to be off, too—she
saw him try to break away more than once—but it was
nearly ten minutes before the farmer remembered the
afternoon’s milking and reluctantly went out.
Belle did not feel secure in the drawing-room, and
asked him to come out of doors. He protested for her
sake, as a light drizzle was falling, and it ended in their
going together into the big barn. They had its vastness
to themselves, and there seemed something vaguely
terrible about its size to-day, for the light of the drizzling
afternoon was only feebly spread among its shadows.
Daniel had often dreamed of loving Belle under the
mighty wing of its darkness, but now he felt almost
afraid. Here was neither darkness nor light, but a grey
dusk woven of the tears of the day, and though he was
alone with Belle, he could not speak, for his intense pity
for her had made him fear her, as he had never feared
her before.
She spoke first, and her words were like a knife,
cutting right down into the wound of his fear. She had
no pity for him—her one thought was to do his business
quickly, so that she could turn to her own.
“Daniel, it’s no good. I can’t go on with it.”
“With what, Belle?”
“Our engagement—our marriage.”
He began to stammer.
“B—but, darling—that’s—that’s what I came over
about. I—I wanted to tell you it makes no difference
... even if it’s true.... I—I don’t mind—I love you
just the same.”
“That isn’t what I mean. I mean that it’s I who—I
can’t go on with it. I’m sorry, Daniel—I know I should
ought to have done this long ago—or better still, I
shouldn’t ever have let you love me. It’s my fault. But
I can’t help it. I can’t marry you now that I know ...
do you guess what I know?”
“Yes—mum guessed ... but, Belle, it makes no
difference....”
She brushed his protest aside.
“I’m going to have Ernley’s child. I can’t marry
you when I know that.”
“But, lovey, I don’t mind—I swear I don’t. And
it only makes it the more necessary I should marry you—quick.
Then folk can’t talk so—or anyway their talk
won’t hurt you.”
“I can’t help their talk. I’d rather they talked....
I can’t help it. I can’t marry you now I know this.”
He began to look scared. At first he had put her
words down to her humility, and he had thought them
words of renunciation, but now he was half-guessing their
true significance. Here was something altogether terrifying
and incomprehensible.
“Belle, sweetheart—you mustn’t talk so. You just
about must marry me now, or you’ll be done for—ruined.
Oh, darling, don’t think I’ll ever miscall you for this, or
fail you—and I’ll be kind to the kiddy, I swear I will—I’ll
love it as if it was mine.”
His generosity almost reached her pity, but pity came
too late now. The instinct which dragged her from him
was stronger than any emotion which pulled her towards
him—all that she could do was to soften her words a
little.
“Poor Daniel—I’m unaccountable sorry. I know I’m
treating you badly, but I can’t help it. I wish I could
explain it all, but I can’t. Oh, can’t you understand?
If I was to marry you I’d feel I was doing something
wicked—committing adultery. Oh, I know I’ve done
wicked things before, and you’ll think I’m silly to mind
now. But this is different somehow—if I married you
I’d feel I was doing worse than any other thing I’ve done.
Oh, Daniel, do try and understand.”
Perhaps he was hardly to be blamed if he couldn’t.
“But, Belle, didn’t you love me all those times when
you said you did?... You must have loved me when I
held you in my arms, and you came so close, and you
gave me all my kisses back....”
“I know. I loved to be in your arms and feel you
taking care of me—but things are different now—I
I couldn’t bear you to kiss me....”
His face suddenly went dark.
“Then you can’t really have loved me, or you wouldn’t
change—even now ... when things are different. Belle,
I believe that you loved Ernley all the time.”
“Maybe I did—I must have—though I didn’t know
it.”
“Then you’ve played the harlot to me. You’ve taken
me in. You’ve given me your kisses for what you could
get....”
He stopped suddenly, for he could just see her face
in the faint light, and her eyes were pools of fear and
pain. Even though he guessed that neither was on his
account, he must pity her. He realized all that she had
set before herself by this refusal of his protection, now
in this last moment of her extremity. He could not
believe that Ernley, probably engaged to another girl,
would turn to her again. Without Ernley, without
Daniel, she would have to face shame, friendlessness,
poverty and pain. Something very strong, very terrible,
must be driving her, even though he couldn’t understand
it.
“Forgive me, dear. I shouldn’t ought to speak so.
I’ll believe that you were honest with me, though I can’t
understand you now.”
“Oh, Dan, I was honest, as far as I knew my
heart.”
“But what do you mean to do about it if you don’t
marry me? I reckon Ernley’s engaged to Miss Jenner,
and you can’t do ... have ... go through this without
being married.”
“I can—I must”—setting her teeth—“I will.”
He relented absolutely.
“Since you won’t have me, let me tell Ernley what’s
happened. He’d never let you face it without him ...
reckon he’ll chuck that girl ... anyways he should ought
to provide for you.”
“Daniel, promise me—swear to me—you won’t
breathe a word to Emley. I won’t be beholden to his
pity. If you tell him I—I’ll kill myself.”
He was more bewildered than ever.
“Promise me, Daniel,” she repeated hoarsely, and he
promised—shaken in heart and head.
The conversation seemed to have withered. They
stood in the darkness, staring at each other. Voices
sounded in the yard, coming from the cowhouse, and
suddenly both were taken with the same fear—that they
should be found here together, and be given the teasing
due to lovers in the dark.
“Get out, Daniel,” cried Belle—“out by the cartshed
door.”
“But you’ll let me see you again? Belle—I can’t bear
this.”
“No—don’t come again—not just now. Oh, don’t
you see it’s no good? I’ll never change my mind—I’m
finished.”
“But you can’t....”
“Yes, I can—get out, damn you! If you don’t go
now I’ll never see you again as long as I live.”
“If I go now, will you see me?”
He was like a child pleading.
“Yes—yes. Some day—next week. But get out,
anyway. I’m off.”
With a sudden swooping gesture she blundered like a
white owl through the darkness to the main door of the
barn. He heard her calling her father’s, her sister’s
name—making truce with the invader, in order to escape
more easily from him, her sweetheart and servant.
The rest of that day was like a bad dream, and the next,
and the next. Dan felt broken by all that had happened,
and bewildered by his conflict of pain. He did not know
which he felt worst—Belle’s pain or his own. Sometimes
the worst thing in life seemed to be the thought of her
alone, disillusioned and friendless, on the eve of losing
her last rags of reputation, her last apology for a
home—of having to face the supreme ordeal of any
woman’s life without help or hope. The fact that this was
due to her own deliberate choice did not make it more
endurable—on the contrary. Her isolation seemed to be
all the greater because his arms were outstretched to
hold her, if only she would turn his way. At other times
he would be completely beaten down by the sense of his
own loss, of his own shame. He would also tell himself
that he must have failed her in some mysterious way—that
it was impossible to believe she had not loved him
once—she had weighed him and found him wanting.
Thus his two griefs, for her and for himself, would
sometimes be brought together in an all-enveloping
regret.
He said nothing to his family about what had happened.
A new shamefaced reserve was upon him. He
could not bear that they should know what had happened
to him, or what was going to happen to Belle. Also in
his heart, giving a fiery quality to his suffering, was the
torment of hope, the feeling that Belle must change,
relent towards him and towards herself. Then these days
would be but a dreadful interlude, better secret and so
forgotten.
Of course the Sheathers knew that something was
amiss. Dan’s was not one of those natures which can
carry on its fundamental activities in private, giving the
neighbours a surface decoy. His travail was noticeable
in his looks, voice, behaviour and appetite. But its
causes were misjudged. His family attributed his anguish
simply to his knowledge of Belle’s condition. Apparently
there were limits to his assumption of Ernley’s cast-off
property. Kitty was glad to see the boy show so much
spirit.
“Maybe he have the spunk—you call it—not to marry
her after all.”
“I hope the boy’s got too good a heart for that,” said
Tom.
“Too good a heart!—you call it good heart to disgrace
his family by marrying rubbish!”
“Come, come, my dear. You shouldn’t ought to
speak like that of poor Belle. Reckon it ain’t the match
we’d have chosen, but then it ain’t our part to choose,
neither.”
“Ho! that’s the way you manage these things, you
English. You say to the boys and girls: ‘You choose
each other,’ and never mind what the fathers and mothers
think.”
“Well, what about yourself, ma’am? Reckon if you’d
gone by what your family said, you’d never have married
me.”
“My father he like you very well, and as for Eugene
and Philip, they are only my brothers. I do not ask my
brothers.”
“You’re meaning that you’d never have married me
if your dad hadn’t given his consent?”
“Certainly I never marry without his consent. But
your boy he never so much as ask yours, and he marry a
girl who have no character and already belong to a friend
of his. Now she will have a child too soon after they
are married, and the neighbours will say unkind things,
whoever they think it belong to. You may think nothing
of that, but I am ashamed.”
Tom merely looked at the ceiling and whistled. His
argument was clearer to his heart than to his head, and
his wife had, as usual, talked him down. At the other
side of the table, Christopher smiled as he lit a cigarette.
He felt thankful and superior because so far the love of
women had not touched him.
Dan was a conscientious soul, and he would not break
his promise to Belle. On the other hand, he took his
promise very literally. He had promised not to see her
till, the earliest, next week, therefore on Sunday morning,
immediately after breakfast, he set out for
Batchelors’ Hall.
By this time he had settled himself into the conviction
that he had only to see Belle in order to persuade her.
His mind was full of a flood of despairing eloquence, and
he hardly realized how little of that tide would actually
rise to his lips. Her reasons for refusing to marry him,
which still seemed so arbitrary and mysterious, could
surely never stand before the torrent of his love, his pity
and his pride in her. Therefore it was necessary that
he should see her at the earliest possible moment, to end
his torment and hers.
It was an altogether unexpected blow and backthrust
of fate to find, when he came to Batchelors’ Hall, that
Belle was not there. She had gone away. Such a possibility
had never occurred to him. Such a thing had
never happened before. Where had she gone?
“How is it that you didn’t know?” asked Lucy.
Daniel shivered in the ice of her gaze.
“Reckon she must have made up her mind unaccountable
sudden.”
“Reckon she did. But it’s queer her not having told
you....”
Her eyes still froze him—they were like the pale blue
cracks in ice.
“Is there anything the matter between you and
Belle?” she inquired.
“No—there ain’t nothing.”
“Because,” continued Lucy, “if you back out now,
reckon dad ull have something to say to you.”
The freezing process changed disruptively to one like
burning alive. Dan suffocated and blazed.
“I back out! I tell you.... I dunno what you
mean. I’ll marry Belle to-morrow if she’ll have me. You
haven’t got no right to speak so.”
“Oh, very well, don’t lose your hair. Only it’s
strange your not knowing where she is.”
He suddenly realized the need for prudence.
“Where is she?” he pleaded.
“Over at her cousin Loo Dengate’s at Heathfield.
It’s queer your not knowing.”
“Three Cups Corner.”
“That’s it—the house just beyond the throws.”
“I’ll be up there to-morrow. Reckon it came over
her sudden to go. She’s a queer girl in some ways.”
“Reckon she’s not the only one who’s queer.”
Dan’s wrath re-kindled.
“Why d’you keep on getting at me, Lucy? I tell
you this ain’t my doing. I’ll marry Belle to-morrow
if——”
“You know you can’t marry her to-morrow, so what’s
the sense of talking? But if you take my advice you’ll
marry her just as soon as you can get the banns put up.
Now I haven’t any more time to spend arguing here.
We’re short in the house with Belle being away, and old
Gadgett’s been laid up this week and over, and Botolph
needs more looking after than the sheep. Oh, it’s a grand
life for girls!”—and she banged the door in his face.
Dan was so stricken that his first thought was to
tramp over at once to Heathfield and find Belle. But
his second thoughts reminded him that it would take till
night to go there and back on foot, that he could not
fail the George at its Sunday evening opening, and that
if he waited till to-morrow he could have the trap and
avoid a domestic uproar. So he set off drearily homewards,
down the drive and over the flat fields of the
Dicker, across the river Cuckmere at Monkyn Pin, then
on to the chalky roots of Firle.
He did not particularly want to go home, but there
seemed nothing else to do. His own company was intolerable,
with its questions and regrets, and there was
no other company that seemed better to-day. Mr. Marchbanks
would be busy all the afternoon with his church
and catechism—besides, he was inclined to take Jess
Harman’s view of Belle Shackford, and had not been
too well pleased to hear of Dan’s engagement, though
he had said very little. As for Ernley, he was even more
impossible. For one thing Dan had promised not to tell
him anything, and knew that he could not be ten minutes
in his company without telling him everything. For
another, he knew now something of that strange dark
attitude towards Ernley which Belle had had towards
Pearl Jenner. He knew that it was really Ernley who
had robbed him of Belle—or rather, and more humiliating
still, that he had never really had Belle so that he could
talk of robbery. Belle had always been Ernley’s—all the
time that she had clung to Daniel and given him kisses
and promises, she had really been Ernley’s, in a far
more final and terrible way than any of them knew.
No, he had better go back home, and pour out ale and
whiskies, and wash and polish glasses, and lean over
the counter and talk of ships and horses to the Sunday
loungers between Lewes and Newhaven. Then he would
help his mother clear up, and lay the tea, and perhaps she
would give him a little kindness, though she must not
know what he was feeling. Then in the evening he would
go to church, and perhaps find more comfort in the
homely smells and drawling melodies of Bullockdean
worship—get back in time for the evening’s traffic—and
then tumble into bed and be tired enough to sleep.
He was hurrying on, dragged by these urgencies, and
had nearly reached the top of the Bostal Way, when at
a turn he met the district nurse coming down towards
Alciston. He wondered vaguely whom she could have
been visiting on the wilderness of the down, when he
remembered Lucy’s reference to old Gadgett’s illness—the
shepherd’s cottage stood remote in a hollow near
White Lion pond. There was no housing close to Batchelors’
Hall, and for years the old man had lived two miles
from the centre of his work. Dan had always been fond
of him, and now felt uneasily remorseful for having neglected
him during the thrills of courtship. If he had the
nurse in, the poor old chap must be pretty bad.
“Good morning, Mr. Sheather.”
Daniel had not met the nurse, who lived at Berwick,
more than once, but it was characteristic of him that
those who met him once always felt well acquainted.
“I’ve just been talking about you,” she continued,
“to old Mr. Gadgett at White Lion Cottage, but I never
thought to meet you so far from home on a Sunday
morning.”
Daniel, wondering how much she knew about Belle,
blushed and mumbled something about Sunday being a
good day for a walk. Then:
“How is the old fellow?” he asked. “I only heard
to-day as he’s been ill.”
“He’s sadly, I’m afraid—not likely to leave his bed,
though perhaps he’ll stop there a month or two before
he’s carried out. He gets wandering at times—takes me
for his daughter, who’s been dead thirty years. But I
hope some day you’ll go and see him. He says you
promised him long ago, and he’s got something to show
you.”
“I dunno whatever that can be. But reckon I’ll go in
some morning. I haven’t time to-day.”
He must hurry back home, and pour out ale and
whiskies, and wash and polish glasses, and lean over the
counter and talk of ships and horses to the Sunday
loungers between Lewes and Newhaven—help his mother
clean up, and lay the tea—and go to church—and carry
on somehow, till at last he was tired enough for sleep.
Daniel was wrong in his idea that by deferring his
visit till Monday he would be able to make it comparatively
without protest. It appeared that Monday was the
very day of James Munk’s funeral.
“Go over to Heathfield! I never heard of such a
thing!” cried Kitty—“when it’s the funeral this
afternoon.”
“I can’t help that—and I don’t care for funerals.”
“Then you are a wicked boy.”
“Come, come, my dear,” pleaded Tom; “he never
was so thick as all that with poor Munk. If you and I
go, and Chris, reckon there won’t be any harm in Dan
taking the trap over to Heathfield to see Belle.”
“He saw her yesterday,” said Kitty, for Dan, alas!
had been deceitful. “I can’t think why he must see her
again to-day, especially as she go to Heathfield. Why
can’t she stay at home?”
Dan looked sullen.
“I can’t help it. I must go.”
“Must go! Hark to that—hark to the boy. And
what will your dear friend Ernley say if you ‘must’
go?”
“I don’t care what he says. I’m going.”
In the end, he went. When Kitty discovered that he
hadn’t got a decent suit of black clothes and not a single
white handkerchief, she minded less. So Daniel drove
off soon after breakfast, Ernley’s British warm buttoned
up to his chin. The weather was cold and grey and
lowering, and clouds of dust bowled up the Lewes road,
powdering the banks and hedges till they too were as
grey as the sky.
It was a long drive to Heathfield—across the Ouse
at Iford, then into the Beddingham road at the Lay,
then along the huge, dusty, motor-ridden London to
Eastbourne road as far as Firle Cross, where he had the
quiet of lanes once more, through Ripe and Chalvington,
twin villages of the plain, as far as Muddles Green. Then
it was all cross-country by Thunders Hill and Terrible
Down and the unaccustomed roads round Chiddingly.
He was on the long wooded slope of country which rises
from the valley of the Cuckmere to the heights of Heathfield
and Cross in Hand—the black-country of a bygone
day, when at night forge after forge would show a
crimson eye through the dense woods, when the hammers
of North Street answered the hammers of Lions Green,
when Gun Hill and Thunders Hill and Clappers and Pigstone
and Burntchimney first were given their names.
It was the afternoon before he found himself in Heathfield’s
four-mile street, which runs dwindling from the
spot where the yeoman named Iden smote down Jack
Cade, to where the little lanes of the Rushlake and Dallington
Weald flow into it like small streams at Three
Cups Corner. He had not much difficulty in finding the
Dengates’ house, which was just behind the inn, but it
was altogether a tougher matter to get speech with Belle.
“I’m sorry, but you can’t see her,” said the Dengate
cousin who opened the door; “she came here to get away
from you,” she added, with disconcerting frankness.
Belle, then, had not been ashamed to tell of the rupture—at
least, not to tell her cousins, though her father
and sisters had had no explanation. Daniel had not
expected this—he had somehow expected her tongue to
be tied as his had been. He was now in unanticipated
difficulties, but on one thing his mind was made up—he
was not going back to Bullockdean without seeing Belle,
if he had to hang round the place all night he would see
her. So finding there was nothing to hide from the
Dengate cousin, he pleaded valiantly—he begged for just
five minutes of Belle—he would shoulder the guilt of any
false pretences necessary to obtain the interview—he had
come fifteen miles to see her—if she could see him this
once he promised to give up and never bother her again—but
if she wouldn’t see him, he would have to keep on
at it till she did. This last consideration may have been
the one that influenced Belle, but the Dengate cousin
was honestly won by his big dark eyes. The slightly
foreign air of his emotion appealed to her Saxon
stolidity, and at last Dan was admitted into the little
best parlour of the Dengates, where the walls were
adorned with stuffed ferrets and owls, and wedding-groups
of the many marriages which had taken place in that
large family—innumerable white brides stared with
gentle mocking eyes at him as he sat waiting for Belle.
Directly she came, the whole thing suddenly appeared
to him as folly. He had been a fool to pursue her all this
way—his importunity had only put him further into her
contempt. He should have let her be. She would finish
it now—the little that had not been finished in the great
barn of Batchelors’ Hall.
“Well, Daniel, reckon you might have let me alone.”
She was more like a white owl than ever to-day, all
the colour gone from her cheeks, all her feathers—the
feathers of her golden hair and her brave clothes—limp
and draggled. She wore an outdoor coat over her blouse
and in the buttonhole was a dead jonquil.
“You might have let me be.”
“I couldn’t, Belle.”
“Why not? Haven’t I suffered enough?”
“That’s it. You’ve suffered too much. It’s time you
let me comfort you.”
“Never.”
“But why, Belle? Why? I don’t understand.”
“You don’t understand that I can’t have any other
husband than my baby’s father?”
“Well, that ain’t generally what people do.”
“What do they do generally?”
His mind went over a series of hasty, patched-up
marriages, and he realized for the first time that what he
offered Belle was not really a very fine thing.
“You know,” he mumbled.
“Yes, I know—they take anyone to give them countenance
and a name to the child. But I won’t do that.
Not because I’m too proud, but because I just couldn’t
... when I think of marrying a man who isn’t Ernley
I feel sick.”
“But, darling, I wouldn’t ask anything of you—only
to be with you and save you from being spoken of
and treated bad.”
“That ud be a fine life for you.”
“I’d sooner have it than life without you.”
“You say that now, but you wouldn’t say it in a
year or two. I’d never let you do a thing like that, and
I couldn’t bear it myself, neither.”
“But Belle, think what ull happen if you don’t marry
me. Reckon your father and sister ull go against you—maybe
they’ll turn you out. You won’t have a penny—how
are you to manage?”
“I’ll manage well enough. I’m able to work——”
“But when the time comes.”
“I’ll be all right.”
For the first time he noticed that there was something
sulky about Belle—something in the full drooping line of
her mouth which hinted at sullenness.
“I shan’t be any worse off,” she said, “than if you’d
never asked me, and reckon it was uncommon queer of
you to ask me, so soon after my losing Ernley and all.”
His face went red—he was turning angry. Then he
realized that she was hurting him because she’d been so
terribly hurt herself, and his anger went its usual course
into pity. “Belle, maybe it ain’t too late for you to have
Ernley even now. We can’t be sure as he’s engaged to
that girl—and reckon you’ve quarrelled and made it up
before this.”
“He is engaged to that girl—he loves her, anyway
... I wouldn’t touch him. I’d sooner die than him
marry me now—marry me out of pity. Since I won’t let
you marry me out of pity, d’you think I’d let him?”
“I’m not wanting to marry you out of pity. I love
you, Belle.”
She sighed wearily as she saw the argument going
back to its beginnings.
“Oh, reckon it’s waste of time trying to make you
understand. All I wish is that you’d leave me alone.
I’m sorry, Daniel—I know I’ve treated you badly. But
I can’t help it—I must do as I feel.”
“But what are you going to do?”
“I dunno yet. Stop on here a bit, and then go back
to father’s. Now, don’t start; ‘and what ull yer do after
that?’ I tell you I don’t know. I shan’t marry you and
I shan’t marry Ernley, that’s all I know.”
She turned wearily towards the door, and he knew
he could not hold her.
“Belle,” he tried piteously, but she shook her head.
“You asked five minutes and I’ve given you twenty—and
we couldn’t say any more if we talked all night.”
She went stooping through the door, and suddenly he
realized that it was closed between them. He was alone
with the stuffed ferrets and the white mocking brides.
Belle spent at Three Cups Corner some quiet, sullen
days. Then she said that she could not stay there any
longer. She must go home and face her fortune. She
felt restored by that quiet week—the change of surroundings,
her sense of isolation in her aunt’s family, whose
attitude was casual and whose curiosity easily satisfied,
the freedom from manual work—all these things helped
build up her mind into a form of courage. She had
better go home while she felt like this.
So one afternoon she travelled Down-wards, leaving
the wealden slope, with its woods and its show of houses,
for the lonely reedy places of the Cuckmere winding at
the roots of Firle. The family was at tea when she
arrived, and during the meal nothing passed but the
commonplaces of return, news of the Dengates and news
of the farm; but at the end of it, Ted Shackford hurried
the younger members out rather peremptorily.
“It’s time you were off to Gadgett’s, Nell, with those
eggs. Tim will go with you.”
“There’s no need to start now,” grumbled Nell; “it’s
the first time I’ve sat down this afternoon.”
“You be off,” said her father, with such unaccustomed
decision that she actually rose to go.
“Don’t be a fool,” Belle heard Tim whisper to her
as they went through the door—“they’re going to ask
Belle about the baby.”
So she was not going to be kept long in suspense.
The racket was going to start right off this minute. She
wished she could have entered into it without the disconcertment
of Tim’s words, without the blush and the
prick of tears that they had brought. Still, it was just
as well for her to realize what she was in for with her
family. Lucy remained seated at the table, blushing as
red as Belle; Ted Shackford had risen and slouched about
the room.
“When are you going to get married?” he asked
suddenly.
“Never, as far as I know.”
“How d’you mean?”
“I’ve broken off my engagement with Daniel
Sheather.”
“Broken it off! When?”
“Before I went to Heathfield.”
“You broke it off—yourself?—in heaven’s name....”
“Don’t be a fool, Belle,” said Lucy—“you can speak
the truth to us. If that man’s let you down, dad ull
jolly well make him——”
“He hasn’t let me down. He’d marry me at once if
I’d have him, but I won’t.”
“Are you quite mad?”
“Maybe”—Belle laughed.
“But, look here,” continued Lucy—“we’ve a right to
know why you’ve done this. Why do you send him
away directly you know that if you don’t marry....”
“That’s just it. I’m not going to marry Daniel
Sheather just because I’m going to have another man’s
child. I don’t love him, and I couldn’t bear it.”
“But if you don’t love him why the hell did you get
engaged to him in the first place?” cried Shackford.
“Because I thought I could love him some day, and
I—I didn’t know this.”
“But are you so thick that you can’t see that it’s
this what makes it all the more necessary that you should
get married at once?”
“Not to Daniel Sheather.”
“Oh—I see—you’re still thinking of Munk.”
Belle winced.
“I’m not.”
“But you must marry one or other of ’em.”
“I shan’t marry either.”
“I don’t believe she’s broken it off,” said Lucy—“I
believe it’s Sheather’s cried off now he knows.”
“Well, I’ll soon find out if it’s that,” said her father.
“I’m going over to see him to-morrow.”
“No, dad, no! For heaven’s sake leave Daniel alone.
I tell you it’s my doing, not his—I won’t have him.”
“Will you have Munk, then?”
“No—I won’t. And, besides, he’s engaged to somebody
else.”
“Oh, is he? He thinks he can do that sort of thing
when he’s landed you in this mess. I’ll soon show him
different.”
“Oh, father, I’d rather die——”
“I think you’re very selfish, Belle,” said Lucy.
“Don’t you see that it’s not only you who has to go
through this; it’s all of us. If you have a baby without
being married your family will get some of the disgrace;
and me hoping soon to be married myself——” Lucy
held up her handkerchief to her eyes.
“I can’t help that,” said Belle sullenly—“if you like,
I’ll go right away.”
“That won’t help us much,” wailed Lucy, “people ull
get to know of it just the same. Really, Belle, I do think
you might consider your family a little. For years now
we’ve put up with your goings on. I don’t want to
preach, but really I think you deserve what you’ve got—first
it’s been one man and then it’s been another, and
you’ve been lucky that this hasn’t happened long ago.
Now at last you’ve got the chance of marrying and
settling down, and you won’t take it.”
“I tell you I don’t love him.”
“And I tell you that you ought to sacrifice yourself
a little and not insist on that. Besides, you don’t know
whether you love him or whether you don’t. You loved
him two months ago.”
“I didn’t really.”
“Then you were a fool, and you’ve no right to ask
us to take the consequences of the silly things you
done.”
“Would you marry Munk?” asked her father.
“No—no—not for worlds.”
“Well, you’ve got to marry one of ’em—either the
one who’s willing or the one who ain’t. I tell you I’m
going over to see ’em both to-morrow, so you can choose
which you’ll have.”
“Dad, you’d never!”
“By God, I will! I’ve stood enough from you, miss.
Reckon I’m an easy-going chap or I’d have learned you
better ways. But now you’ve gone too far—dragged us
all into the mud and then turned obstinate. This isn’t
the time for you to chuck a good offer of marriage. You
aren’t ever likely to get another—and if your sort don’t
marry it goes to the bad. It’ll be a fine thing for us
when we’ve got a daughter on the town—prouder than
ever we’ll be of our Belle. You behave yourself and try
and undo a little of the bad you’ve done. If you won’t
marry Daniel Sheather you can marry Ernley Munk, and
I give you till to-morrow to decide which.”
Belle burst into tears.
“I can’t be sorry for you,” said Lucy—“you’ve
thought of nobody but yourself all through. You don’t
know how it stands against a girl to have a bad lot for
her sister. If you’ve got no shame on your own
account, you might have a little on ours. Besides, this
time next year you’ll be jolly glad we made you patch
it up.”
“I won’t! I won’t! I’ll die sooner than marry either
of them. There’s no good your going over to Bullockdean,
dad—I won’t have either Dan or Ernley—and they
won’t have me, neither—you’ll only have disgraced me
for nothing.”
“Disgrace! You talk as if that was something new
for you. Disgrace! You’re a walking disgrace, and if
I was a man like my father I’d have given you the rope’s
end long ago and learned you morals. I tell you what’s
going to happen now. If by to-morrow morning you’ve
given me your solemn promise you’ll marry Sheather, I’ll
go over and settle up with him, and there won’t be any
more trouble. But if you won’t have Sheather, you shall
have Munk. I’ll see him to-morrow, and if he’s engaged
to that Eastbourne girl he’ll have to chuck her and marry
you.”
“He can’t—he won’t—and I won’t have him, if he
does.”
“Well, I’ll have a try, anyhow. At least he shall
know what’s happened and what’s expected.”
“Don’t!” cried Belle.
But Shackford, furious as only an easy-going man can
be, had gone out, slamming the door.
Belle turned wildly on Lucy.
“You swine!—you might have stood by me! At least
we’re both women.”
She clutched Lucy’s fair crimped hair in her hands as
she sat at the table, and pulled it about her ears. Lucy
screamed, and Belle, suddenly more terrified of herself
than of anything, ran out of the room.
The next morning Daniel Sheather was serving in his
father’s bar when Ernley Munk walked in. He had not
seen nor spoken to Ernley since James Munk’s death, and
he felt horribly embarrassed at the sight of him, in a
smart new suit of clerical grey with a black tie.
“Well, Daniel, you’re a nice one.”
Daniel could not find a suitable reply. He felt acutely
that he was indeed “a nice one.” His rupture with Belle
was now public property, and Ernley must have heard of
it days ago and be waiting for the confidences due to the
event—though that same event may also have explained
his callous ignoring of his friend’s recent trouble.
“I made sure you’d be coming over to see me,” continued
Ernley—“every night I’ve been expecting you,
since the funeral—and before it, too.”
Dan still said nothing. Since the day which was to
Ernley the day of the funeral and to him the day when
he had last seen Belle, he had scarcely left the George.
The condolences of his own family, mixed as they were
with covert relief, had been hard enough to bear without
the thought of enlarging their circle in Bullockdean. Mr.
Marchbanks, Jess and Maudie Harman and Ernley himself
would all be glad to know that Daniel Sheather was
not going to marry Belle Shackford after all—“Never
would have done—not a bit his sort—I told him so,” he
could hear everybody saying—“Thank heaven he’s
escaped before it was too late. I wonder why it was
broken off.” ... Relief and curiosity—covered by varying
thicknesses of compassion—were all he had to expect
from his friends, so he had kept away from them, preferring
the company of the strangers who came to the
George from Lewes and Newhaven. In their society he
had drunk a great many whiskies, and had even taken
part in those mysterious shufflings with the names of
horses and slips of paper which it had always been his
business to detect and stop.... Now he felt ashamed.
He saw that he had behaved badly and had treated his
friends badly.
“I’m sorry, Ernley,” he mumbled.
“So am I, old chap. Damnably sorry. You’ve been
let in for a wretched business. Look here—can’t your
brother take over this bottle-washing for a bit, and you
come and have a drink with me across the road? We
may be interrupted any moment here.”
Dan doubted very much whether Chris would be so
obliging, but solved the problem by calling his father.
Tom was only too glad for his son to get out of the place
for a bit. He did not care for this solemn, home-hugging,
whisky-drinking Daniel, and was relieved to see him cross
the road once more in Ernley’s neglected company.
The Crown was wrapped in its usual noontide peace.
The bar was red with sunshine that streamed through its
bright curtains on to the clean sawdust of the floor and
the polished table at which the farmer of Burnt Green
and the farmer of Highbarn sat talking and drinking ale.
From behind the counter Maudie Harman smiled a
speechless welcome.
“We’re getting ready for Easter,” said Ernley, as
they went upstairs. “Two sets of people coming—one
on the second, and one on the fourth.”
“Shall you keep things going as they used to be?”
“More or less. I’ve got the same ideas as dad—I
want to make a decent little country hotel out of this
place. We’re getting on that way ... next year I may
run up an extra wing. People seem to care less and
less for going into ‘Apartments’ in the country—they
got scared off that during the war. What they want now
is a cosy little pub—that sort like it called a pub—which
ull take ’em in at about three guineas a week. They find
that over a month’s stay it doesn’t work out at much
more than, say, three or four rooms at a quid each, and
all the bother of doing their own catering. I shall give
luncheons and teas as well—I’ll put up a sign on the
high road this summer—but to private parties only, no
beanfeasts or charabanc crowds. Now, you could do that
if you liked—it would mix well with your sort of business,
and wouldn’t interfere with ours. The only way for two
pubs to exist in a village this size is for them to follow
different lines and cater for different sorts of customers—and
that’s what the George and the Crown have done up
till now.”
While he rattled on in this way he was busy fetching
drinks. He evidently did not want to talk of intimate
matters till they had a bottle between them.
Daniel took the hint.
“You needn’t worry about us trying to poach on your
lay,” he said bitterly; “we couldn’t manage the charabanc
parties even. I reckon you’re right in saying we
ought to keep to different lines, but you needn’t talk as if
ours paid as well as yours. You can’t make much money
out of drinks these days, especially when you sell drink
like ours.”
“Well, try some of this. It’ll put a heart into you.
It’s a special malting of Truby’s I was lucky enough to
get a cask of, and am bottling myself. It’s like wine—got
a bouquet instead of froth,” and Ernley passed his
nose over his glass before sipping it.
Dan drank his in a less experienced manner, but if
it did not actually put a heart into him, it put a tongue.
“I suppose that as a start off to this scheme of yours,
you’ll get married?” he remarked.
“Married!—whom to?”
“Why, Miss Jenner, of course.”
“Miss Jenner would not be flattered to hear you say
so. She has set her hopes on something far higher than
a country publican. Besides, she isn’t at all the sort of
girl I’d want for keeps.”
Daniel stared.
“Then why did you trot her out like that in front of
us all?—said you wouldn’t come along to supper unless
you brought her. I made sure you were engaged.”
“I trotted her out, as you call it, because I didn’t want
Belle to think she was the only one who had got over
our little affair and fallen in love with somebody else.”
Daniel gaped as well as stared. Ernley’s words
seemed to him rather too glaring an example of the truth
to be found in strong ale.
“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” continued
Ernley.
“About Miss Jenner?”
“No—you fool. About Belle.”
Daniel flushed miserably. Even Messrs. Truby’s first
malting was unable to make him face that topic in a
gallant spirit.
“I thought you’d have come over and told me about
it,” reproached Ernley.
“I couldn’t—I felt too bad.”
“You were afraid, I suppose, that I’d say ‘I told you
so,’ or ‘it’s a good thing you found out in time.’”
“Found out what?” cried Dan, with a start.
“That you weren’t suited to each other. You were
afraid I’d say that, so you kept away. I’m sorry you
didn’t come, for it ud have done you good. Your sort
of chap is always the better for talking. I’m going to
make you talk about it now, and you’ve no idea how
much better you’ll feel.”
Daniel for some reason felt affronted. Ernley seemed
to be patronizing him from the vantage of his free heart.
“I don’t want to talk about her.”
“But I do. I want to talk about her most particularly.
I want you to tell me if the reason of her giving
you up was that she’s still keen on me.”
Daniel was utterly taken aback, and could not answer.
“Is Belle Shackford still keen on me?” asked Ernley,
his eyes glittering.
Dan had by this time collected himself enough to remember
that his vow of secrecy did not necessarily cover
more than Belle’s condition. He had not promised never
to divulge her feelings.
“Well, reckon she is keen on you. But what difference
does it make?”
“A lot.”
“You don’t mean ... you’re not telling me that you’re
still sweet on her.”
“I am. Keen and sweet.”
Daniel spluttered.
“Then why the hell ... why the hell did you let me....
I tell you I’d never have courted her if I’d known
... you told me you were shut of her—it was all
finished.”
Ernley rose to his feet, and came and stood beside
Daniel’s chair, his hand on his shoulder.
“Look here, old Daniel. The thing’s like this. It
isn’t your fault—I blame myself entirely. I told you I
wasn’t keen on Belle because I was too proud to let on
that I was, after all that had happened. I made sure that
she’d finished with me, too, and I was afraid that if you
guessed I was still fond of her, you’d tell her somehow.
Another thing I made sure of was that she’d never have
you. When I found she would, I was knocked over.
Then I simply had to get hold of Pearl and trot her out.
I wasn’t going to let Belle think I still wanted her, and
I wanted her so much that I felt everyone must know it.
Then dad died, and I knew I was a free man and could
have married Belle if we’d still been lovers. That made
me pretty mad, you bet. Then I heard she’d broken with
you——”
The rapid flow of words was checked, and he stared
at Daniel.
“I reckon,” said young Sheather—“that you think
I’m unaccountable good-natured.”
“Because I believe I can talk frankly to you about
what I feel for Belle?”
“Because you can talk so calm about all you’ve made
Belle and me suffer through not knowing your own mind
and being too proud to speak it when you did. We’ve
been in hell both of us—through you. And now there’s
no good you talking of her caring about you still, for she
won’t have you, whether she cares or not. It’s too late.”
“How d’you mean?”
“Well, reckon she’ll never take you on again now, for
all that she won’t have me. She told me she wouldn’t.
She told me she’d rather die....”
He rose to his feet as he spoke, and for a moment the
two men stared at each other in silence. Then they were
startled by a knock at the door.
“Who’s that?” cried Ernley.
“A gentleman to see you, sir, downstairs. A Mr.
Shackford....”
There was a brief pause. Then Ernley said:
“Show him up.”
“I don’t want to see him,” cried Daniel.
“Don’t be a fool! You’ve nothing to reproach yourself
with—it isn’t you he’s come after. I wonder what
he wants out of me.”
Daniel turned away and stood by the window. For
that moment he hated Ernley—who in the midst of all
this tragedy and humiliation was happy and confident
because he knew Belle still cared for him. He did not
worry about her outraged heart or the barriers it had set
up—he did not really care about Daniel’s sorrow—he was
telling himself what he had said he would never have
told Daniel—that he and Belle weren’t suited to each
other, and therefore it was all for the best that they had
found out in time ... “in time”—that was good—“in
time” for Ernley still to have her ... the Sheather worm
was turning.
Shackford walked in.
“Hullo! Both of you here. That’s what I want.
I went to the George first, and they told me Sheather
was at the Crown. I want a word with both of you.
Where’s my daughter?”
The question was equally startling to both. Dan
turned from the window and came forward into the
room.
“Isn’t she at home?” he asked, bewildered.
“If she was, I’d scarcely have come all this way to
ask you where she’d got to.”
Shackford evidently meant to be unpleasant.
“We neither of us have the faintest idea where she
is,” said Ernley, “though we were talking about her
when you came in. When did she disappear?”
“Yesterday evening—after a row with her sister.”
“Then why should you imagine that either Sheather
or I know where she is?”
“Well, reckon both you men knew more about my
girl than I do.”
Dan’s memory was whirling with fears. It seemed
extraordinary to him that Ernley could still retain his
calm assurance, now with an added touch of impudence.
Was the fact of Belle’s love so sustaining and fulfilling
that it would suffice even when Belle herself might be lost
in danger or even in death?
“I believe she’s killed herself.”
The words burst from him as he remembered her
own. He saw her standing before him pale and rigid—he
heard her say “if you do, I’ll kill myself.... I’d
rather die than——”
“Killed herself! Why should she have killed herself?”
asked Ernley—“after a row with her sister.”
“I guess what the row was about. Reckon everybody
was on to her, same as I was, wanting her to tell
you or else marry me.”
“I said she must marry one or the other of you, and
I’d come over here this morning and settle with whoever
she chose. I told her there was to be no getting out
of it, not by her or by either of you fine gentlemen.
Then I went off—and she fell upon her poor sister Lucy
and hit her about—and then ran away goodness knows
where.”
“She’s killed herself,” cried Daniel desperately—“she
said she would if Ernley knew, and you said you were
going to tell him——”
“Tell him! I reckon he don’t want much telling.”
“What do you mean?” asked Ernley. “What’s all
this about telling?”
“I reckon you know that the reason this man here
has broken off with my daughter is that he’d no liking
for all you’d let him in for.”
“It ain’t true!” cried Daniel. “I never broke off.
I’d have married her any day, and done my best for the
kid. It was she who said she couldn’t have me....”
His voice tailed off as he looked at Ernley. All his
calm assurance was gone now, suddenly broken, like a
bubble. His face was colourless, and he clutched the
back of a chair.
“Do you mean to tell me that Belle is going to have a
child?”
“I do, sir.”
“Then why in God’s name....”
“She wouldn’t have you told,” cried Daniel—“she
said she’d kill herself if I told you, and now I reckon
she’s done it.”
“How long have you known this?”
“Maybe a week or ten days. When Belle knew for
certain she said she couldn’t marry me, or anybody but
you. So you needn’t talk of my breaking off——” turning
angrily on Shackford.
“And you knew that and never told me.”
“She made me promise I wouldn’t. She said she’d
kill herself if I did. She said she’d rather die than marry
you.”
“You fool! You blasted, bone-headed fool! You
believe everything a girl says when she’s beside herself,
and freeze on to a secret that may ruin two lives. I’ll
marry Belle the minute I find her, and you bet she won’t
make any fuss.”
“You speak like a gentleman,” cried Shackford. “I
knew you’d do the proper thing if you was given a
chance. I said the same to her. It’s a lucky thing I
came over. It’s a lucky thing I wasn’t like some people,
listening to every silly thing a silly girl says.”
Daniel felt these censures undeserved.
“If she didn’t mean what she said, why did she run
away like that?”
“She’d had a row with her sister, I tell you—pulled
down her hair and scratched her face—not that she
hadn’t good reason”—remembering that Ernley was now
a man of intentions—“Lucy’s got a tongue like a wasp’s
sting, and reckon Belle was getting terrible worked up
at everything. She’s the best-tempered girl in the world
as a rule. That’s why she’s run away—she’s ashamed
of herself. But I bet she hasn’t gone far—back to her
cousins at Heathfield, most like, where she’d just come
from.”
“Well, you’d better go and look for her there,” said
Daniel, almost crying—“and then come back and drag
the pond.”
“I’ll go over at once on my ’bus,’” said Ernley.
“How did you come here?” he asked Shackford.
“I came on horseback, and if you’re going to Three
Cups, I’ll just ride quietly home again. You’ll do your
job better without me.”
“You’re just pretending you think she’s at Three
Cups,” broke in Daniel—“you know she ain’t there
really. You know she’s drowned herself.”
But Ernley had recovered his old assurance.
“Don’t be a fool, Daniel,” he said—quite good-humouredly—as
he went out of the room.
But when the afternoon came, Daniel, too, had his
legitimate reproaches, which he was too human not to
make. Ernley had returned from the weald—so much
faster the miles flew under the tyres of his motor-bicycle
than under the wheels of the George trap—and his quest
had been in vain. Through his cocksureness he had lost
valuable hours that might have been spent in search.
He and Shackford had yielded to the fatal optimism of
men who know themselves to be in the wrong and try
to recover their self-respect through hope.
He was chastened by his failure. He no longer
swaggered before Daniel, he no longer abused him.
Indeed, he listened to his advice, and together they set
off, in saddle and side-car, to make inquiries and notify
the police. The evening passed fruitlessly. The police
had no light to shed on the affair, and Belle’s friends,
either in Lewes or Newhaven, had heard nothing of her.
Perhaps she had gone off somewhere by rail, but once
again inquiries, whether at Lewes Junction or the wayside
stations, brought no result. Daniel no longer said,
“She’s killed herself”—he sat dumb beside Ernley in the
side-car, or followed dumb behind him up and down
stairs and along passages. It was Ernley at last who
said:
“We’d better get over to Batchelors’ and drag the
pond.”
The spring night had fallen as they bowled up towards
Lewes from the coast. A faint greenish light hung over
the downs, and the summit of the sky was full of stars.
A keen wind blew in their faces, bringing dampness and
chill. Dan shuddered and still was dumb.
Ernley’s headlight rushed before them over the surface
of the road, with a flying gleam on the hedges. It
lit up the wheels and sides of passing wagons, leaving
their loads in darkness—it lit up the doors and steps of
houses as they ran through Beddingham and Firle—and
always it showed them half a dozen orange yards of road
ahead. As they rushed on Daniel had the absurd dream
that if only they could reach the end of that glowing road
before them they would find Belle. But the orange road
was like the moon’s path on the sea, it had no ending.
Neither of them spoke as the motor-cycle ate up the
road and the darkness. At last it bumped into the drive
of Batchelors’ Hall, lurching and creaking in the ruts, the
engine labouring with the drag of mud on the wheels.
The orange light flashed over the puddles and the long
canals in the ruts—it ran ahead of them into the yard
and lay on the stones as Ernley brought the machine to a
standstill.
Shackford stood on the doorstep. He, too, had lost
his compensating hope, and looked like Ernley, hangdog
and desperate.
“Any good?” he asked.
Munk shook his head.
“I’ll get the men,” said Belle’s father, “and drag
the pond—and if that’s no good we’ll try the Cuckmere.”
That night, it seemed to Daniel, was full of water—the
sight of it, ruddy with the lanterns held over it, the
sound of it, lapping against the shore, and against the
sides of the boat in which Bream the cowman put out
with a long pole, the feel of it oozing through the mud
over the tops of his shoes.... The pond yielded a load
of weeds, a stock of old iron-ware, and three little
drowned kittens in a bag with a stone.
Between dragging the pond and dragging the river
they had drinks in the house. Dan and the farm men
had cocoa, but Ernley and Shackford had whiskies without
much water. Lucy served them, fully dressed though
it was one o’clock in the morning, and with the pretty
hair that Belle had torn down piled high and curled anew.
The tears ran down her cheeks, and she spoke forgivingly
of Belle.
“Of course I forgive her,” she said. “She didn’t
know what she was doing.”
Nobody else spoke much—even the whiskies did not
seem to help Shackford and Ernley—and soon they all
went out again. They dragged the place where the
Cuckmere in its windings makes a bay, eating into the
meadows by Hayreed. But here again there was no finding.
After all, they did not really expect to find. As
Shackford said, Belle might have chucked herself in anywhere
between Monkyn Pin and the Dicker. They had
no special reason to think she would inevitably have
drowned herself near home.
Daniel thought of White Lion Pond and Red Lion
Pond and Jerry’s Pond, all the dew ponds between the
valley of the Cuckmere and the valley of the Ouse.
“She may have gone up on the down,” he said.
Both Shackford and Ernley thought it probable that she
had. They had searched the Ouse and Cuckmere valleys,
the two big towns and the railway line. Also, during the
afternoon, when Ernley and Dan were rushing about on
the motor-cycle, Shackford had made inquiries at the two
Dickers and the two Horsebridges, also at Hailsham,
where he had interviewed a couple of conductors on the
Eastbourne bus route. The down seemed the only
hiding-place left unchallenged. It was decided to make
up a search-party.
“Let me walk with you, Daniel,” said Ernley, when
everyone scattered.
The dawn was white, and only a few stars still hung
in the north, above the Gate of Lewes. It was bitterly
cold, and the men shivered. They all carried lanterns,
for it had been dark when they left Batchelors’ Hall,
and the moving spots of light were like stars, making
the down look like a fallen sky.
If Belle were hiding—if she had sought only a temporary
and not a final refuge from her oppressors—she
might see those stars and go out towards them. She
surely would be tired of hiding now—now that the down’s
back was hoar with half-frozen dew and the dawn-wind
searched the hollows. Ernley’s face was pinched and his
teeth chattered. He was almost failing physically. A
day spent in the saddle of his machine, a night spent in
dragging a pond and a river, all under the strain of sickening
remorse and anxiety—and to finish all, too many
whiskies ... no wonder he was done for. Daniel, whose
physical labours had been less, whose physical strength
was greater, and who was not suffering from a reaction
after too much alcohol, was still comparatively able-bodied,
though—dreadful and humiliating to realize—most
unconscionably sleepy. He waited for Ernley while
he puffed on the steep slope, he slackened his pace to
match Ernley’s tottering progress.
“Don’t you think you’d better get home?” he suggested
at last.
“I couldn’t. I couldn’t rest till she’s found—alive
or dead.”
They walked on a couple of furlongs. Then Ernley
said:
“Do you think there’s any chance of her being alive,
Dan?”
“Maybe there’s a chance—maybe we’d think there
was more than a chance if we weren’t so terrible scared.
She’s been gone only a day and two nights. Reckon she
could have hid herself for that.”
“If I find her,” said Ernley—and in the grey light Dan
could see that he was crying—“if I find her, there’s going
to be nothing good enough for her. Oh, Dan, how am
I ever to pay her back for what I’ve made her suffer?”
His voice, though hoarse, was quite calm, in spite of the
tears that ran down his cheeks. It was only physical
weakness that made him cry. The grief of his heart was
beyond tears.
“Don’t think I fail to realize what you suffer, Daniel.
But it’s nothing to what I do. It can’t be. You’ve
nothing to reproach yourself with. You’ve been kind
and manly and decent all through. I haven’t. I’ve been
a swine—a proud swine and a cruel swine. All the
quarrels we ever had were my doing, and I blamed her
for them all. I was angry with her because I couldn’t
give her what she wanted. I could have given it to her
if I’d wanted it as much as she did—but I didn’t—so
I was angry with her for wanting it. I took advantage
of her, Dan—because she wasn’t wise, like most women.
If she’d said, ‘You must wait till we’re married,’ I’d
have married her rather than wait. But she didn’t, and
I took advantage of her and made her wait till I thought
things ud be more convenient. If we’d been married we
shouldn’t have had any of those rows, for they all came
of her not really belonging to me. If we’d belonged to
each other we shouldn’t have mistrusted each other so,
and been jealous, and imagined all sorts of things about
each other. Then this last time we quarrelled, I was
furious with her because of the way I’d hurt her, and I
swore I’d never make it up again. I couldn’t stand being
made ashamed of myself time after time like that, so I
swore I’d stop it, and started off with Pearl Jenner at
once just to show Belle it was good-bye for ever this
time.... I said to myself she was getting to count on
my coming round.... Oh, and she’d humbled me too—she
didn’t let me off easy.... I paid for every quarrel
we had by the way I was obliged to make it up.... But
I couldn’t live without her, so I always came back, and
I said, ‘She knows it. She expects it this time, so I’ll
teach her she don’t always get what she expects.’ That’s
why I took up with Pearl—though she was only trash—only
draper’s stuff. I must say it was a blow to me
when Belle got engaged to you. It made me swank more
than ever—Belle wasn’t to know I cared. She wasn’t going
to marry you knowing that I still loved her, and get the
last laugh. I never thought.... It’s my blasted pride
that’s driven her to this. She couldn’t even turn to me
when she wanted to—I’ve cut her off. Think—all that
time I was so mad against her, she was carrying my
child. Oh, there’s fate in that—the fate of my own bad
will. I’ve done her in—poor Belle!”
Dan tried not to listen while Ernley spoke. He blushed
to hear his friend’s confession, he was horrified at this
stripping of his mind. If this was love—the genuine
passion as apart from the jog-trot emotion he was supposed
to feel—he was glad he had never experienced it.
“Reckon you’re tired out,” was all he could say;
“you’ll be ill if we go any farther—you’d better get
home.”
The day was quite clear now, though the sun had
not yet risen. Their lanterns were no longer stars, merely
opaque orange splashes on the whiteness of the morning.
“I can’t go as far as Bullockdean,” said Ernley.
“Then we’d better turn back for Batchelors’. Besides,
your bike’s there, and Lucy can give you some breakfast
before you start.”
He was relieved to find that Munk had given way,
for he was obviously unfit to go searching much farther.
By daylight his face looked far more ravaged than it had
looked in the glow of the lanterns. His body, gassed and
wounded, bore the stigmata of war, and was always liable
to sudden collapses. Dan gave him an arm as they turned
backwards, and his friend seemed glad of it. Sheather
was glad too. He loved to expend physical care and
protection, though he shrank from the sick-nursing of
souls. With Ernley’s body he was tender.
“There—hang on to me. I’m strong as a horse—you
can put all your weight.”
They went on half a mile, Munk occasionally stumbling
but always held up by Dan’s sturdiness. When they
came to the dip of the down, where the slope ran swiftly
towards Alciston, he stopped and shuddered.
“I can’t go down there. I feel giddy.”
With memories of the same symptoms in earlier
“attacks,” Dan was practical.
“There, there—don’t worry—don’t try. Sit down.”
Ernley collapsed in a huddled heap upon the hoar dew.
Dan sat down beside him with supporting arm, and was
immediately conscious, as the other in his nervous straits
was not, of the wet striking up into his limbs.
“Reckon you shouldn’t ought to sit here. You’ll get
rheumatics.”
“I can’t help it—I’m done.”
Dan looked round him for an unlikely stone. Nothing
broke the whiteness of the half-frozen dew, but he suddenly
realized the turning to old Gadgett’s cottage at the
top of Bostal Way.
“Look here, if you can walk just a hundred yards,
there’s Gadgett’s cottage we could go to. Then you
could sit by the fire and I’d get you a cup of tea.”
Ernley groaned. His devil was upon him—the devil
that had risen in a hideous cloud behind the headless trees
of Waertsel Wood, and crawling and stinking over the
shell-holes had found him where he lay helpless, and
taken possession. Nevertheless the picture that Dan
painted was a fair one.
“Couldn’t you bring the tea to me here?” he asked
idiotically.
“Of course I couldn’t—it ud be stone cold. And even
if it wasn’t, it wouldn’t do you any good sitting here
on the wet grass. You’ll get rheumatics and lumbago
and sciatica and belly-ache and chills and pneumonia
and I dunno wot else if you don’t stand up quick.”
He stood up himself, and seized Ernley under the
arm-pits.
“Now then—up you get.”
Ernley groaned, and Dan brought his knee in ungentle
contact with his spine.
“Get up, Ernley.”
This wasn’t his first encounter with his friend’s devil,
and he knew that Ernley possessed must be treated in
direct contrast to Ernley unpossessed. He must be bullied
and ordered about, just as on ordinary occasions he must
be looked up to and treated respectfully. It was characteristic
of Dan that he slipped quite naturally into the
latter mood when the need for the former had passed.
He soon had Munk on his feet, and part threatening,
part coaxing, part hauling, guided him over the down
to the head of the Bostal Way—then along the little
chalk path that winds among the blackberry bushes, till
at last they were on the step of Gadgett’s cottage.
The morning was still colourless, for though the sun had
risen, there was no pomp in the east, which was iron-grey
with clouds. The down’s back, under its coat of rime,
was grey too, like the hull of a man-o’-war—even the
cottage had assumed the prevailing tones of grey and
white, with pits and streaks of blackness where the
shadows fell. White Lion cottage and a couple of disused
barns stood about a hundred yards from the pond
at the top of the Bostal Way. On either side of the doorstep
daffodils were a-bloom, but as dredged of colour as
the lanterns which Daniel and Ernley still foolishly
carried were dredged of light.
“The place ull be shut up,” said Munk.
“No it won’t. Reckon he’s got to leave the door
open for the nurse. Anyways, I don’t suppose he’d lock
up—that’s a high-class custom.”
He proved to be right. The door was on the latch,
so he pushed Ernley in, and through into the kitchen.
The fire was laid, and Daniel soon had a light in it, with
the kettle on to boil. He propped up Ernley in the wicker
arm-chair, with his feet on the grate, and the hearthrug
over his knees.
“And now while the kettle’s boiling I’ll go upstairs
and have a look at the old man. Maybe he’s heard us
come in, and is wondering what it’s all about.”
He ran up the ladder-like little flight, and listened for
a moment outside the bedroom door. Not a sound was
to be heard. He pushed the door open and looked in.
The curtains were only half-drawn, so the daylight was
in the room, smiting the light of a small fire burning
smokily in the grate, and the flame of a single candle on
the dresser beside the bed. In the mixture of daylight,
firelight and candlelight he could see the old man lying
asleep in the bed; and in a chair beside him, an open
Bible on her knee, her head fallen sideways on her
shoulder, her legs stretched out forlornly in tattered
stockings, slept Belle Shackford.
Daniel stood and gaped—shut his eyes to make sure
he wasn’t dreaming, then opened them and gaped again.
It would be hard to say when he would have recovered
the use of his faculties if Belle had not woken up.
“Hullo,” she said dreamily.
“Belle!” gasped Daniel.
She woke up fully, and sprang to her feet.
“How did you get here?”
“How did you get here?”
They faced each other, almost terrified. He did not
dare tell her Ernley was in the house.
“Oh, Belle! I’ve been nearly dead because of you.
What in the Lord’s name are you doing here? Reckon
your dad’s out searching the whole down after you.”
There was a slight stir of the forgotten figure in the
bed.
“My dear——”
“It’s all right, father—I’m here.”
She went to the old man’s side and stooped over him.
“I’ll get you your tea in a minute.”
“That’s right, dearie—that’s right. ’Tis only I had
a dream about your mother and your Aunt Hetty.”
“I’ll put on the kettle straight away.”
She moved across to the fireplace.
“I’ve a kettle on downstairs,” said Daniel.
“What made you come? How on earth did you know
I was here?”
“I didn’t know—leastways—anyways, I’ve put the
kettle on.”
“Who’s the young chap?” came from the bed.
“He’s Daniel Sheather, father.”
Daniel was growing more and more confused.
“Has he coming a-courting you?”
“No, dear, not he!”
“Well, I’m glad of it, for I’d be sorry to lose you
yet awhile. I’ve had a bit of a cold, Ma’as Sheather—a
bit of a cold, and just a touch of rheumatics in my
boans, so as I can’t get out on the hill just now. Howsumdever,
my young darter has been looking after me
fine, and I reckon to be out in a day or two.”
Dan did not know what to say. The situation was
beyond him. However, he was spared the burden of carrying
on the conversation, for at that moment a loud
fretful voice shouted from downstairs.
“Where the hell have you got to, Daniel? The kettle’s
boiling over.”
Belle jerked herself upright on her knees beside the
fire.
“Who’s that?”
Daniel stuttered.
“It’s Ernley,” cried Belle.
She looked towards the door, then out of the window.
She was like a hare when the pack has cornered her.
“Let me go!” she cried frantically—“let me go!”
Then: “Daniel, don’t let him find me.”
But her panic had betrayed her, and her voice had
reached Ernley in the kitchen below.
“Daniel—who’s that upstairs?”
For a moment Daniel thought Belle would climb out
of the window. She made a movement towards it, then
suddenly seemed to turn to wood. A footstep mounted
on the stairs, and she stood like a wooden woman in the
middle of the floor, staring over Daniel’s shoulder
through the open door behind him. Then, also quite
silent, Ernley came into the room, and took her in his
arms, still made of wood.
Daniel did not see her return to flesh and blood. After
he had held her stiffly and silently in his arms for a
few moments, Ernley led her away, and the next thing
Sheather became conscious of was the kitchen door
shutting behind them.
“Who’s the young chap?” asked Gadgett.
“Ernley Munk—from the Crown at Bullockdean.”
“Munk ... Munk.... It’s Pepper at the Crown.
I hope Pepper ain’t courting my young Ellen. He ain’t
a straight chap. He chalked me up a quart pot when
I’d only had a pint. I won’t have my Ellen courted by
a chap who can’t measure his ale.... Say, young feller,
she’s gone out wudout making my tea. Reckon I’m
parched fur a cup o’ tea.”
It was Dan’s lot, somehow, to be making tea while
the skies were falling. Evidently fate refused to take
him seriously in a tragic part. While Ernley and Belle
fought for the life of their wounded love downstairs, he
pottered about the bedroom with the kettle and tea-cups—shook
up old Gadgett’s pillows and made him comfortable—gave
him his medicine and answered obligingly to
the name of Jack.
Once he crept down and listened at the kitchen door.
A curious silence brooded within—then he heard a faint
movement and a still fainter voice ... evidently love
was not being healed with words. As he went upstairs
again there was a stir in the house behind him, and he
saw that the nurse had come in.
“Hullo, Mr. Sheather!” she called—“I never expected
to find anyone here so early.”
“Don’t go into the kitchen,” pleaded Daniel.
“And why not?”
“Because Miss Belle Shackford’s in there.”
“Miss Belle Shackford! You don’t mean to say she’s
found?”
“It’s odd as she ain’t been found before seeing as
she’s seemingly been here all the time.”
“She can’t have been. I was here at six o’clock
last night.”
“Reckon she went and hid when she saw you coming.
I brought Ernley Munk in here to make him a cup of tea
as he was feeling a bit ordinary—and there was Belle
sitting beside the old man, and him thinking she was his
daughter who’s been dead ten years.”
“He takes every female he sees for his daughter.
Many’s the time he’s called me Ellen and told me not to
start walking out with their shepherd at Place. We must
see about getting him into the infirmary some day soon.
I’ve let him stop on here, as he seemed so set on it, but
most days he doesn’t know or care where he is.”
She had come into the room and went bustling over
to the bedside.
“Well—what’s this I hear about you? You’ve been
sheltering a lady.”
But old Gadgett was unequal to raillery, and confused
by these flitting females. Dan thought it best to rescue
him from the nurse’s ministrations.
“I’ve given him his medicine—and his tea along of
it. Reckon he won’t want much doing for him. If you’re
going back to Alciston it ud be Christian charity for you
to call over to Batchelors’ and tell ’em there she’s found.”
“It ud be better still if I took her back with me.
What’s she doing down in the kitchen all by herself?”
“She ain’t by herself.”
“Oh!”
The nurse looked wise, and at the same time as if
she expected further enlightenment. But Dan said
nothing. He stood with his back to her, drumming at
the window.
“Is Mr. Ernley Munk with her?”
The rumour of Belle’s troubles was now up and down
the two valleys of the Ouse and the Cuckmere.
“No, he ain’t,” snapped Daniel. Which was a pity,
as the nurse ran into him and Belle at the bottom of the
stairs, and thenceforward had no high opinion of young
Sheather’s truthfulness.
They came into the bedroom together, and found
Daniel sitting on the low chair beside the bed, where the
old man was dozing off again.
Seeing them standing together, he knew instinctively
that they were reconciled. But there was nothing
triumphant, nothing passionate about their reconciliation.
They stood stiffly side by side, without word or
caress. Evidently they had come by stormy paths to
peace.
“Hullo,” he said awkwardly.
“It’s all right, Dan,” said Ernley, in a quiet, rather
flat voice. “Belle and I are friends again, and we’re
going to be married as soon as ever it’s possible.”
There was no display of rapture to make him jealous—scarcely,
indeed, the appearance of ordinary happiness.
None the less, Daniel felt sore right through. He had not
realized till then that up to that very moment, in the face
of the impossible, he had been hoping that Belle might
change, and turn to him again.
“It really is for ever this time,” Munk continued,
with a faint smile. “We’re not going to quarrel any
more. It hurts too much, doesn’t it, Belle?”
“Yes, it hurts,” she nodded.
“And we’re both ever so grateful to you, Dan, for
being such a good friend to us both.”
Dan coloured. He did not feel specially a friend of
either at the present moment. If they had been richly
and aggressively happy he would have felt less alienated
than he was now by their queer exhaustion. He saw
mysteries, depths in their being which had always hitherto
been veiled from him, the outsider, but which were not
strange to either of those two.
“How are you, Ernley?” he asked, deliberately
breaking the situation.
“I’m well enough. Don’t you bother about me. I’m
going to take Belle home now.”
“The nurse has gone there.”
“Yes, we saw her, and told her we’d follow.”
Belle looked regretfully over to the bed.
“He’ll be sorry when I’m gone.”
“How long have you been here?” asked Daniel.
“Since the day before yesterday. I came up straight
from Batchelors’.”
“No—not straight,” broke in Ernley. “Dan, she
went up to the pond, and she walked in—my Belle—and
then when the water was all up round her, she couldn’t
... so she came out, all dripping wet, and crawled in
here, thinking she might dry herself at the fire....
And the old chap thought she was his daughter, and she
felt so glad of a little kindness that she stayed, and tried
to make herself think it was true. You did, didn’t you,
Belle?”
“I was silly,” she murmured.
“No, not silly—it was I who was ... who’d driven
you to this—so hard that you wished you were Ellen
Gadgett, nursing your old sick father.”
“When the nurse came I went and hid in the lean-to.
She came twice a day.”
“And how long ud you have stayed,” asked Daniel,
“if we hadn’t found you?”
“I dunno—I didn’t think. Reckon I was cruel, but
I thought nobody cared about me.”
“You knew I cared.”
For the first time he had called their attention to his
tragedy. Her eyes suffused.
“I’m sorry, Daniel.”
“We’ve treated you badly,” said Ernley. “But, Dan,
if you’ll let us—we’ll try and make it up to you.”
“We can’t,” said Belle, more wisely.
Daniel said nothing. He turned away from them and
hid his face in the coverlet of the old shepherd’s bed.
When he looked up they had gone out together.
He spent the rest of the day with Gadgett. He had
not the courage to go home and tell his family that he
had found Belle and lost her for ever. He would wait
and let the story reach them first, as it would by inevitable
conduits before night. Also he was sorry for the
poor old man waking to find himself deprived of his
daughter. But in this respect he need not have troubled,
for Gadgett woke up forty years later than he had fallen
asleep.
“That you, Ma’as Sheather?”
“It’s me, Mr. Gadgett.”
“Well, I call it more’n uncommon kind for you to
have called around to see me, and if you’ll go over there
to the fireplace and turn your back on me for a minnut
I’ll show you what only a few has seen.”
Dan, in obliging apathy, turned his back. A few
moments later an inarticulate sound came from the bed.
“Are you ready, Mr. Gadgett?”
There was no reply, but a kind of summoning croak—and
when Daniel turned round he knew the reason. Mr.
Gadgett was wearing his teeth.
For a moment Dan, too, was speechless. He had
forgotten all about the teeth, and even if he had remembered
them and the shepherd’s promise to show
them to a good boy, he would have been surprised. The
sight before him was truly an astounding one. Mr. Gadgett
had set out not only to supply nature’s deficiency,
but to improve on her perfect work. Instead of thirty-two
teeth he had fifty, twenty-five in each row. The
result was a grin of terrible magnitude.... Daniel
gaped—it was lucky that he was feeling so miserable,
or he might have laughed. When he considered that the
wonder had been given its proper due of amazement the
old man’s jaws worked convulsively as he freed them to
express his satisfaction.
“Wunnerful, ain’t it?”
“Surelye, Mr. Gadgett.”
“You never thought to see such a set of teeth. A
dentist couldn’t do it more fine.”
“That he couldn’t.”
“It’s took me nigh on ten year, getting ’em all together
and fixing ’em proper. And now I mun be thinking
of having my likeness took; but I’m that stiff in my
boans maybe it’ll be some days before I’m upon the hill—let
alone I get into the town.”
“How are you feeling to-day?”
“I feel valiant, save as there’s aches in all my boans,
and the power is agone from my legs. I ask the Lord
how I am to follow the sheep on the hill if He takes the
power out of my legs like this?”
“Reckon you’ll be all the better for a good long rest.”
“I’m not so set on that. I’d sooner be out wud the
sheep on the hill. But it ain’t reasonable to expect it of
me, and I’ve always understood as the Lord is praaperly
reasonable.”
Dan said nothing, feeling uncertain of the matter.
“There’s that nurse is an unreasonable woman,” continued
the old man—“to think of me come down to
having a nurse, and I done for myself this last twenty
year. She’s all for putting things where they don’t
belong, and the trouble I’ve had wud her notions you’d
never believe: ‘I’m biling kettle for your hot water, Mr.
Gadgett, to give you a bit of a wash.’ A bit of a wash!
And she washes my chest and my back, which no mortal
Christian ud wash between October and May—and she
calls that a bit of a wash.... I’m like to take my
death of cold wud her bits and tricks.... She’s an unreasonable
woman, wot shall never see my teeth.”
Daniel was beginning to feel drowsy in the little room,
full of thick green sunshine and crowded furniture. A
fly was buzzing against the window pane, and seemed
to be the voice of the stuffy afternoon.
“If I cud only get out to my sheep.... Mus’ Shackford
ull be unaccountable put about wud me laid up
here. There’s that fool Botolph’s got ’em now....
Reckon he’ll have ’em all straggled—and the lambing
just upon us.... I mun be up for the lambing.”
“You’ll be up, sure enough, Mr. Gadgett.”
“I mun be up, surelye; or ... this is a tarble thing
to have happened to a poor old man past seventy year.
I’m fretted after my sheep.... Have you seen my gal,
Ellen? She was here just now ... the one who’s in
service at Place ... but maybe it wasn’t her—I disremember.
Not an illness had I as boy or man, and now
in my old age it comes upon me. Howsumdever, I’ll
always say as the Lord ain’t unreasonable, and I’d have
naught against Him if I cud get out to my sheep ...
before that fool Botolph spiles their fleeces.... He’ll get
’em all straggled.... I wish you had ’em.”
“I’ve never had anything to do with sheep. I’d be
worse than Botolph.”
“Wot? Ain’t you their shepherd-boy at Place?...
No, now I see as you ain’t. But I know who you are,
and I know you’re good wud all beastses ... beastses
and children ... I seen you.”
Dan’s heart suddenly tightened—he thought of Leslie
and Ivy at Brakey Bottom, and he could not bear the
thought. He would never be anybody’s father now....
He leaned his head against the bedpost, not troubling
any longer to hide his misery. After all, Mr. Gadgett
was scarcely there—he had gone back to live in yesterday.
But the old man seemed to have noticed that something
was wrong.
“What ails you, lad? Do your boans ache?”
“It’s my heart that aches, Mr. Gadgett. I’ve had
trouble.”
“Trouble ... trouble ... so have we all.”
“Have you had trouble, Mr. Gadgett?”
“Surelye—trouble on trouble.... Howsumever, I’ll
always say as the Lord is reasonable.”
When the time came Dan was both sorry and afraid to
go. He had enjoyed a certain amount of peace, pottering
about the house and looking after the old man. At
the George there would be nobody to look after—on the
contrary, everyone would be looking at him ... who had
helped find Belle for Ernley.
He dragged out the walk over the down as late as
possible. The day was out, and the sky was a-swim with
stars. From the back of Firle he looked down on two
valleys full of mist. Already some of the richness of
spring was in the night, and he felt some of it mocking
him in his blood. He knew how all these scents of earth
and grass and growth, this softness in the air, might
have flowed like sap through his love for Belle, quickening
it towards flower and fruit. And now instead it was in
him as a thirst, stirring up desire towards a void....
As he walked through the mocking, urging, sweet spring
night, Dan understood a little more about his fellow men,
about those stumblings, those sinkings, those reactions
which before had perplexed and sometimes disgusted
him.
When he came to the George, there was only one old
man in the bar besides his father and Chris. He had
rather hoped for a crowd in which he could be lost.
Tom Sheather beckoned him, and held him out a glass.
Dan gulped it. It was seventy-five per cent. whisky.
His father must know.
“Still, it’s better than if she’d drowned herself, poor
creature!” he whispered to his son.
“Of course it’s better. I’d lost her anyway, so I’m
glad she’s found someone.... Have you seen Ernley?”
“No—but Chris saw Maudie Harman. She told him
she reckoned they’d be married in a week.”
Chris walked out of the bar, whistling “Whose baby
are you?”
“I’m glad,” muttered Daniel into his glass, “I’m
glad.”
But the deadly thing which had been growing in his
heart during the walk home was life-size now. He felt
more mad than glad—mad, desperate, as if he must die
rather than endure any more of this pain. The future
was like a furious face pressed against the window. He
saw himself living for the rest of his life with Belle only
across the way, unable to find rest for his pain, continually
devoured by the spring in his heart.... Oh, God, help
me! I’m done!
His eye fell on the open page of a novelette, lying
on the counter, left there by a customer and forgotten.
“The two fellows went single-file through the darkness
towards the house.
“‘Keep quiet,’ hissed Lorimer, as Jack’s foot struck an
object on the gravel.
“Young O’Connor stooped and picked up whatever it
was. It felt warm and sticky. He still grasped it as they
came to the house and crouched under the window. A
faint ray of light came from under the blind, and he saw
that he was holding a severed human finger.
“Lorimer was taking off his shoes....”
It seemed hours later that his father’s voice reached
him.
“What’s that you’ve got, Daniel? You ain’t listening
to me.”
“A book.”
“Well, you never was the one for books. What’s this
one called?”
Dan reluctantly tore his eyes off the page to inspect
the title—“‘Crook O’Connor, the Public School Boy.’
May I take it up to bed with me, dad?”
“Reckon you may. I don’t know who it belongs to.
And you’d better be turning in, son. You look finished,
somehow.”
Dan walked out of the room, still reading. Upstairs
in his bedroom he shuffled off his clothes and left them
in a heap on the floor; then lit his candle and crept between
the blankets, the precious volume in his hand.
With licked forefinger he “found the place,” and once
more the returning horror was beaten from his mind. He
forgot Belle, her loss and his loss, he forgot the anxieties
of the last two days, his final disillusion, the face of the
future pressed against the window. He was in the
glorious world of Unreality—peopled by ink-black villains
and Gentlemen Crooks, noisy with revolvers and crimson
with blood—a world remote from the humdrum sorrows
of work and loss, of love for human woman as distinct
from the sweet wraiths of print....
Dan was making his first acquaintance with literature.
Hitherto he had never read much—the daily paper and
occasionally the Bible had been the only exercise-ground
of the talent so laboriously acquired at school. But now
he was really reading, for his own profit and pleasure.
He was not reading as the cultured read—to enlarge his
holding in life and art; he was reading as the humble
read—to escape and forget. The author of “Crook
O’Connor” did not know the rules about split infinitives
and mixed relatives, he had no regard for the probabilities
or even for the consistencies, the veins of his characters
ran sawdust, the life he portrayed had no connexion
with any actualities on this planet ... but he had provided
an anodyne for the pain of at least one human
creature, and when the last page was turned and the
candle had guttered out, the ultimate blessing of sleep.
Daniel did not wake up till late the next morning. He
felt heavy and stupid, as if he had a cold. He rose and
dressed himself, and went downstairs, but though the
remains of breakfast still lay on the kitchen table, he
could not eat, though he poured himself out a cup of lukewarm,
bitter tea. He went over and sat by the fire,
shivering. His body was definitely afflicted by the stress
of his mind, seeking the easy way out through sickness
... bed, sleep, forgetting ... but Daniel was still alert
enough to know that would not do—that however high
he pulled the bedclothes over his head, the Crown would
still stand across the road.
His mother came in to clear away the breakfast. He
heard her bustling about, rattling plates and opening and
shutting drawers.
“Well, you’re a nice lazy boy,” she said to him—“not
down till ten o’clock, and then sitting over the fire and
never offering to help your mother—no!”
He did not answer her.
“Sulky!” she cried to him over her shoulder. She
had accused him of sulking more than once during the
past fortnight.
But she could not goad him into action; he could not
even trouble to hide his grief from her, nor the travail
of his soul over its new problem—how he was to get
away. Belle was lost to him for ever—he had never
known till then how much of hope had filled the last two
weeks. She was lost, and yet in a very short time he
would have to endure her daily presence—if he did not
get away ... somewhere ... far—farther than he could
ever go ... away from himself as well as her.
“What’s the matter with the boy?”
She had come to the fireside, to lift the lid off a
saucepan, and she saw him huddled and smitten.
“What’s the matter with the great boy?”
His whole being turned towards her, longed for her,
cried to her....
“Mum!” ...
She looked startled—his thick voice and working face
made her lose her usual critical manner. He saw her
change and soften, and the last of his control was gone—he
threw his arms round her as she knelt by the fire,
and hid his face on her shoulder.
“Danny—what is it?—what’s the matter?”
She held him to her, rocking him gently—it was years
since she had held him so. “What is it—tell mother, Dan.”
“Oh, mum ... you know.”
“It’s that Belle Shackford.”
“You’ve heard?”
“That she will marry Ernley Munk—yes. But it does
not matter.”
“Oh, mother—my heart’s broken.”
“Nonsense—a fine boy like you—you’ll soon get
another girl.”
She had him close in her arms, and she could feel
how strong and plump he was—well made, his bones well
covered, a fine man for any girl.
“But I don’t want anybody but my Belle.”
“You’ll forget her, child.”
“Oh, never. Oh, mother—I loved her ... and I
thought she loved me.”
“Well, you’re well rid—she is vagabond. It never
please me you not marry a good girl.”
“Mother, you mustn’t say that—don’t you miscall
her.”
“Now don’t you speak rough to me.”
She was angry—she pushed him off her shoulder.
They both stood up.
But he could not bear that she should lose her gentleness—he
would humble himself to keep her tender. He
came towards her and offered her a kiss.
“I wasn’t speaking rough—leastways, I didn’t mean
to. I’m sorry, mother.”
She let him kiss her, and patted his hand, softening
again. They sat down together on the horsehair sofa.
“Mother, I want to go away.”
“Away, boy—where? Why?”
“I can’t live here ... with Belle so close ... and
with Ernley....”
“But where would you go?—and what shall I do
without your week’s money?”
“You won’t have me to keep, and I’ll have to work
wherever I go—so I can send you money.”
“You’re a great silly boy. Why should you go
away?”
“I can’t bear to go on living here and seeing Belle
married to Ernley.”
“You need not see her.”
“How can I help it, with her only across the road?
... Oh, mother, I must go away till I’ve got over this—I
can’t stay—I must go ... I must, I must.”
He was getting almost hysterical, and, growing angry
again, she forgot he was her grown-up son, and took
him by the shoulders, shaking him till his sleek lick of
hair fell into his eyes.
“You be quiet—you’re like a little boy—you deserve
me to whip you.”
“I want to go away—I can’t bear Chris....”
“Chris—you shall not speak rough of Chris!—well,
I tell you—you shall go away—for a bit of time. I will
write to my brother Philip and ask him to have my silly
boy to live with him a while.”
“In Sark?”
“That will be far enough—no?”
Sark—and he had thought of Brakey Bottom. For a
moment dim memories stirred ... he saw himself playing
with a lobster’s claw ... then came a swell of
solemn seas....
“You were four years old when you came from Sark.
Do you remember?”
“Not much.”
“It is my country—your country. It do you good to
go back there for a bit. I write to my brother Philip.
I have not written for ten year.”
“Perhaps he won’t have me.”
“Then you can’t go. But I will write—and he will
have you. It is a good plan—perhaps if you go, you
marry a Sark girl and no more be English. I am not
English and wish my children were not.”
“I’ll never marry anybody but Belle.”
“Then you’ll marry nobody, since she’s to marry
Ernley. There, there ... you shall go away across the
sea and forget your trouble.”
He sat beside her on the sofa, stupid and bewildered.
The saucepan on the fire boiled over and she sprang up
to save it. He watched her little darting figure—yes,
she was foreign, his little mother ... and so in a way
was he, though he loved the valleys of the Ouse and the
Cuckmere ... there was a queer, faint stirring in his
heart for the land where he was born.