She was still sitting by the window wondering what to do next, when Mary
tapped at her door.
"May I come in?"
She looked fresh and strong, and her cheery smile made her seem
beautiful to Rose.
"How did you sleep?"
Rose shook her head. Mary laughed.
"I can tell by the looks of you. Look's if you'd been pulled through a
knot-hole, as they say up in Molasses Gap. Heard everything that took
place, didn't you? I did too. You'll get over that. I sleep like a top
now."
"What is that smell? Pah!" shuddered Rose.
Mary elevated her freckled nose. "What smell? O, you mean that rotten,
piney, turpentiney smell—that's the Chicago smell. It comes from the
pavin' blocks, I guess. I never inquired. I'll ask Mr. Reed, he knows
everything mean about Chicago. Well, you hadn't better go to breakfast
looking like that. I want you to paralyze that Boston snipe. I'll bring
in your breakfast."
Rose accepted this service passively; nothing else was to be done in
Mary Compton's presence. She had the energy of a steam threshing
machine, and affection to correspond.
Rose wondered again what she could do next. She was here to study art
and literature—there was the library! She would read. And there were
lectures perhaps; what she was to do would come to her after awhile.
Mary returned a little hot of color, bringing a tray.
"That Boston clothes-pin says you're a myth or a country gawk. You must
lay him out cold as a handspike. I've been bragging about you and they
were all on tip-toe to see you this morning. You sail in on 'em at
dinner the way you used to do at our chapter-house spreads. Weren't they
great! There now, I've got to vamoose. I'm not a lady of leisure. I'm a
typewriter on trial and looks won't carry me through. I've got to
rustle and walk chalk, as they say in Molasses Gap. So good-bye. Take it
easy today. If you want to walk, go over to the lake front," and she
banged out of the door and faced the city in her daily encounter.
Rose ate her breakfast and felt much better. Her trunk came and she got
out her dresses and hung them up and made other preparations for
staying, although it seemed impossible she should ever sleep another
night in this terrible city.
She got out her portfolio and wrote a letter home and one also to Dr.
Thatcher. Then she looked over the little bunch of letters of
introduction she had. One was to Doctor Isabel Herrick, one to Professor
H. Bevan Fowler at Evanston, and one was to Orrin Thatcher; that was the
Doctor's cousin, a young lawyer in the Woman's building, whatever that
was. With these and ten dollars a week she faced Chicago. The contest
was unequal.
She felt this more keenly as she stood on the lake front a little later
on in the day. She went there as the New Hampshire girl goes to the sea.
This body of water, majestic in its immense shoreless spread, is
wonderful to the young girl from Iowa or interior Wisconsin.
A fresh, keen east wind had arisen, pure and exhilarating, and the
smooth expanse of glittering green-and-blue water stretched out under a
vivid blue sky, in which great clouds floated like snow mountains,
trailing great shadows like robes of state upon the lake.
The curving lake-wall was wet and glistening with the up-flung spray.
The slender elms were fronded at the top like palms, and the vivid green
grass set opposite the pink-gray wall, and the brilliant many-colored
lake in magnificent, harmonious contrast. The girl felt her soul grow
larger as she faced this scene, so strange, so oriental, and she looked
and looked, until it became a part of her.
It was all so remote and so splendid. There the great violet-shadowed
sails of ships stood, as she had seen them in pictures of the sea. There
a gleaming steamer ran, trailing great banners of smoke. There glittered
the white bodies and slant wings of gulls, dipping, upshooting and
whirling. To her eyes this was infinity, and the purple mist in which
the ships drave was ultimate mystery.
At last she turned to look behind her. There on the left stood rows of
immense houses, barred and grated like jails or fortresses; palaces
where lived the mighty ones of Chicago commerce. Before their doors
carriages stood, with attendants in livery, such as she had read about
and had never seen. Up and down the curving ribbon of lavender sand
other carriages were driving, with jingle of silver chains and soft roll
of wheels. The horses flung foam from their bits; they were magnificent
horses (she knew horses as well as any coachman), and their
brass-trimmed harnesses glittered in the sun like burnished gold.
There was no noise here beyond the tread of these stately horses, the
babble of a few soft-voiced children on the grass and the crackling,
infrequent splash of the leaping breakers. It was a wide contrast to the
Chicago of her first glimpses the day before. That side of the city
terrified her, this oppressed and awed her. The social splendor of this
life appealed to her perception as it would not to any man. Her quick
imagination peopled these mansions with beautiful women and lordly men,
and she felt herself rightful claimant of a place among them.
She turned and faced them with set teeth and a singular look in her
half-closed eyes, and in her heart she said: "Before I die I'll go where
I please in this city. I'll be counted as good as any of you—poor as I
am."
To the onlooker—to Mrs. Oliver Frost, she was a girl in a picturesque
attitude; to the coachmen on the carriages she was a possible
nurse-girl; to the policeman she was a speck on the lake-front lawn.
Something of this mood was with her still when she went in to dinner
with Mary. Mary ushered the way, beaming with joy. Rose never looked
more beautiful nor more imperious. The Boston man was properly
astonished; the Jew salesman smiled till his chubby face seemed not able
to contain his gladness. Mr. Taylor, a gaunt young man, alone seemed
unmoved; the morose teacher gave a sigh of sad envy.
Rose said little during the meal. She cordially hated Mr. Reed at once.
His Boston accent annoyed her, and his brutal sarcasm upon the West
aroused a new anger in her. She had never listened to such talk before.
It didn't seem possible anybody could disparage the West.
"Civilization stops," he said during the meal, "after you leave the
Hudson riveh."
"Some folks' manners stop after they leave the Hudson river, if they
ever had any," Mary replied, and the Jew cackled joyously.
He defended Chicago. "It is the greatest place to do business in the
world. I'm a New Yorker by birth, but Chicago suits me. I like its
hustle."
"That's the point. It thinks of nothing but hustle," said the Boston
man. "I was speaking of higher things. It lacks the art atmosphere of
Boston and Cambridge."
"It has all the atmosphere I need," said the Jew.
To Rose all this was new. It had not occurred to her to differentiate
the cities sharply from one another. Chicago, to her, was a great city,
a splendid example of enterprise, and it was to be her city, the pride
of the West. To the country mind a city is a great city when it acquires
a million people. Like the young Jew, Rose had not missed any
atmosphere. The tall young man voiced her opinion when he said:
"This finicky criticism don't count. You might just as well talk about
the lack of gondolas and old palaces in Boston. Conditions here are
unexampled. It's a new town and I think a splendid place to live. Of
course you can find fault anywhere."
Rose looked at him with interest. Such precision and unhesitancy of
speech she had not heard since leaving college.
Mary glowed with gratified admiration. The Jew was delighted, although
he did not quite follow the implied rebuke. Miss Fletcher merely said:
"If Mr. Reed don't like Chicago he is privileged to go back to Boston. I
don't think Chicago would experience any shock if he did."
Mr. Reed wilted a little, but he was not crushed.
"The trouble with you people is you don't know anything about any other
city. You come in here from Oshkosh and Kalamazoo, and Okookono—"
"Hit him on the back!" called Mary, "he's choking."
"O-con-o-mo-woc," calmly interpreted Miss Fletcher.
Reed recovered—"And a lot more outlandish places—"
"How about Squantum and Skowhegan and Passamaquoddy," laughed Mary.
Reed collapsed—"O well, those are old, familiar—"
The others shouted with laughter.
"O yes! Everything old and New England goes. You are too provincial, old
boy. You want to broaden out. I've seen a lot of fellows like you come
here, snapping and snarling at Chicago, and end up by being wild
promoters." The Jew was at the bat, and the table applauded every hit.
Rose did not share in the talk—she had so little knowledge of
cities—but it served to make Mr. Taylor a strong figure in her eyes. He
was tall and big-boned and unsmiling. He studied her with absent-minded
interest, and she felt no irritation or embarrassment, for his eyes were
clean and thoughtful. He looked at her as if she called up memories of
some one he had loved in another world, and she somehow grew a little
sad under his gaze.
As they sat in her room after dinner, Mary asked:
"How do you like our crowd?"
"I can't tell yet. I don't like that Boston man. I never could bear the
sound of 'ah'."
"He's a chump; but they ain't all like that. I have met two or three
decent Boston fellows down in the office. Don't think they are all
muffs."
"Of course not."
"Now take my 'boss' for example. He's fine. He's big enough so you don't
mind his airs, but what do you think of Mr. Taylor?"
Rose looked thoughtful, and Mary hastened to say.
"Ain't he fine?" She hoped to forestall criticism.
"Yes, I think he's fine. He makes me think of Professor Jenks."
"A-hugh! so he does me. Say Rose, I'm going to tell you something, don't
you ever tell, will you?"
"Why no—of course not."
"Hope to die?"
"Hope to die, hands crossed."
"Well!"
"Well?"
"I came here to board because he was here."
"Why, Mary Compton!"
"Ain't it awful? Of course, no one knows it but you. I'd just die if he
knew it. I used to be afraid that he'd find out, but he can't, because
you see, he never saw me till I came here, and he thinks it is just
accident. He's so simple about such things anyway, and he's always
dreaming of something away off. O he's wonderful! He's been all over the
mountains. He adores John Muir—you know that man Professor Ellis told
us about? Well, he's lived just that way weeks and weeks in the wildest
mountains, and it's just glorious to hear him tell about it."
Rose was astonished at Mary, generally so self-contained. She talked as
if she had volumes to tell and but short minutes to tell them in. Her
cheeks glowed and her eyes grew deep and dark.
"He's here reading law, but he don't need to work. He's got a share in a
big mine out there somewhere, which he discovered himself. He just
thought he'd try civilization awhile, he said, and so he came to
Chicago. He kind o' pokes around the law school (it's in our
building—that's where I saw him first, in the elevator), just as an
excuse. He hates the law; he told me so. He comes in to see me
sometimes. Of course I leave the door open." She smiled. "But it don't
make any difference to him. He's just the same here as he is anywhere—I
mean he knows how to treat a woman. The school-ma'am said she thought it
was terrible to have a man come into your room—the same room you sleep
in—but I told her it depended on the man. That settled her, for Owen—I
mean Mr. Taylor—don't like her."
Rose listened in silence to this torrent of words from Mary. Her mind
was naturally fictive, and she divined the immense world suggested by
the girl's incoherent sentences. The mysterious had come to her
friend—the "one man of all the world," apparently—a striking
personality, quite suited to Mary, with her practical ways and love of
fun. It confirmed her in her conviction that a girl must adventure into
the city to win a place and a husband.
She rose and put her arms about her friend's neck:
"I'm so glad, Mary."
"O goodness! don't congratulate me. He's never said a word—and maybe he
won't. I can't understand him—anyway it's great fun."
A slow step crossed the hall, and a rap at the door nearly took away
Mary's breath; for a moment she could not reply, then Mr. Taylor's voice
was heard.
"I beg your pardon." He was turning away when Mary sprang up and opened
the door.
"O Mr. Taylor, is it you?"
"Yes—I didn't know but you and your friend would like to go out
somewhere?"
"Would you, Rose?"
"Not tonight, thank you. But you go. Don't keep in on my account."
Mary struggled a moment, then she smiled with tender archness.
"Very well, thank you, Mr. Taylor. I'll be ready soon." After he had
gone she said:
"Perhaps he'll propose!"
Rose glowed sympathetically. "I hope he will."
The next day Rose went down town alone. The wind had veered to the
south, the dust blew, and the whole terrifying panorama of life in the
streets seemed some way blurred together, and forms of men and animals
were like figures in tapestry. The grind and clang and clatter and hiss
and howl of the traffic was all about her.
She came upon the river just as the bridge was being opened. Down toward
the lake, which had to her all the wonder and expanse of the sea, boats
lay thickly, steamers from deep water, long, narrow and black. Excursion
boats, gleaming white, and trimmed with shining brass, lay beside the
wharves, and low-lying tugs, sturdy, rowdyish little things, passed by,
floating like ducks and pulling like bull-dogs, guiding great two-masted
sailing boats and long, low, grimy steamers, with high decks at the
ends. The river ran below, gray-green, covered with floating refuse.
Mountainous buildings stood on either side of the waterway.
The draw, as it began to move, made a noise precisely like an old
fashioned threshing machine—a rising howl, which went to her heart like
a familiar voice. Her eyes for a moment released hold upon the scene
before her, and took a slant far over the town to the coulé farm, and
the days when the threshing machine howled and rattled in the yard came
back, and she was rushing to get dinner ready for the crew.
When the bridge returned to its place she walked slowly across, studying
each vista. To the west, other bridges, swarming with people, arched the
stream—on each side was equal mystery. These wonderful great boats and
their grim brave sailors she had read about, but had never seen. They
came from far up the great tumultuous lake, and they were going to
anchor somewhere in that wild tangle of masts and chimneys and towering
big buildings to the west. They looked as if they might go to the ends
of the earth. At the stern of an outgoing boat four sailors were pulling
at a rope, the leader singing a wild, thrilling song in time to the
action.
So it was—the wonderful and the terrifying appealed to her mind first.
In all the city she saw the huge and the fierce. She perceived only
contrasts. She saw the ragged newsboy and the towering policeman. She
saw the rag-pickers, the street vermin, with a shudder of pity and
horror, and she saw also the gorgeous show windows of the great stores.
She saw the beautiful new gowns and hats, and she saw also the curious
dress of swart Italian girls scavenging with baskets on their arms.
Their faces were old and grimy, their voices sounded like the chattered
colloquies of monkeys in the circus.
It all seemed a battlefield. There was no hint of repose or home in it
all. People were just staying here like herself, trying to get work,
trying to make a living, trying to make a name. They had left their
homes as she had, and though she conceived of them as having a foot-hold
she could not imagine them having reached security. The home-life of the
city had not revealed itself to her.
She made her way about the first few blocks below Water street, looking
for Dr. Herrick's address. It was ten o'clock, and the streets were in a
frenzy of exchange. The sidewalks were brooks, the streets rivers of
life which curled into doors and swirled around mountainous buildings.
It was almost pathetic to see how helpless she seemed in the midst of
these alien sounds. It took away from her the calm, almost scornful,
self-reliance which characterized her in familiar surroundings. Her
senses were as acute as a hare's and sluiced in upon her a bewildering
flood of sights and sounds. She did not appear childish, but she seemed
slow and stupid, which of course she was not. She thought and thought
till she grew sick with thought. She struggled to digest all that came
to her, but it was like trampling sand; she apparently gained nothing by
her toil.
The streets led away into thunderous tunnels, beyond which some other
strange hell of sound and stir imaginatively lay. The brutal voices of
drivers of cabs and drays assaulted her. The clang of gongs drew her
attention, now here, now there, and her anxiety to understand each sound
and to appear calm added to her confusion.
She heard crashes and yells that were of murder and sudden death. It was
the crash of a falling bundle of sheet iron, but she knew not that. She
looked around thinking to see some savage battle scene.
She saw women with painted faces and bleached hair whom she took to be
those mysterious and appalling women who sell themselves to men. They
were in fact simple-minded shop girls or vulgar little housewives with
sad lack of taste.
Every street she crossed, she studied, looking both up and down it, in
the effort to see some end of its mystery. They all vanished in lurid,
desolate distance, save toward the lake. Out there she knew, the water
lay serene and blue.
This walk was to her like entrance into war. It thrilled and engaged her
at every turn. She was in the center of human life. To win here was to
win all she cared to have.
It was a relief to pass into the rotunda of the splendid building in
which Dr. Herrick's office was. Outside the war sounded, and around her
men hastened. She entered the elevator as one in a dream. The man
hustled her through the door without ceremony and clanged the door as if
it were a prison gate. They soared to the ninth floor like a balloon
suddenly liberated, and the attendant fairly pushed her out.
"Here's your floor—Herrick, to the left."
Rose was humiliated and indignant, but submitted. The hallway along
which she moved was marble and specklessly clean. On each side doors of
glass with letters in black told of the occupations of the tenants.
She came at length to the half-open door of Dr. Herrick's office and
timidly entered. A young girl came forward courteously.
"Would you like to see the Doctor?" she asked in a soft voice.
"Yes, please. I have a letter to her from Dr. Thatcher of Madison."
"O! well, I will take it right in. Be seated, please."
This seemed good treatment, and the soft voice of the girl was very
grateful after the hoarse war-cries of the street. Rose looked around
the little room with growing composure and delight. It was such a dainty
little waiting room, and argued something attractive in Dr. Herrick.
"Come right in," the girl said on returning. "The Doctor is attending to
her mail, but she will see you for a few moments."
Rose entered the second and larger room, and faced a small graceful
woman, of keen, alert gaze. She appeared to be about thirty-five years
of age. She shook hands briskly, but not warmly.
Her hand was small and firm and her tone quick and decisive.
"How-d'-you-do! Sit down! I had a note from Dr. Thatcher the other day
saying I might expect you."
Rose took a chair while the Doctor studied her, sitting meanwhile with
small graceful head leaning on one palm, her elbow on the corner of her
desk. No woman's eyes ever searched Rose like those of this little
woman, and she rebelled against it inwardly, as Dr. Herrick curtly
asked:
"Well, now, what can I do for you? Dr. Thatcher thought I could do
something for you."
Rose was too dazed to reply. This small, resolute, brusque woman was a
world's wonder to her. She looked down and stammered.
"I don't know—I—thought maybe you could help me to find out what I
could do."
The Doctor studied her for an instant longer. She saw a large,
apparently inexperienced girl, a little sullen and a little
embarrassed—probably stupid.
"Don't you know what you want to do?"
"No—that is, I want to write," confessed Rose.
"Write! My dear girl, every addlepate wants to write. Have you friends
in the city?"
"One; a classmate."
"Man?"
"No, a girl."
"Why did you leave home?"
Rose began to grow angry. "Because I couldn't live the life of a cow or
a cabbage. I wanted to see the city."
The Doctor arose. "Come here a moment." Rose obeyed and stood beside her
at the window, and they looked out across a stretch of roofs, heaped and
humped into mountainous masses, blurred and blent and made appalling by
smoke and plumes of steam. A scene as desolate as a burnt-out volcano—a
jumble of hot bricks, jagged eave-spouts, gas-vomiting chimneys, spiked
railings, glass skylights and lofty spires, a hideous and horrible
stretch of stone and mortar, cracked and seamed into streets. It had no
limits and it palpitated under the hot September sun, boundless and
savage. At the bottom of the crevasses men and women speckled the
pavement like minute larvæ.
"Is that what you came here to see?" asked the Doctor.
Rose drew a deep breath and faced her.
"Yes, and I'm not afraid of it. It's mighty! It is grander than I
expected it to be—grand and terrible, but it's where things are done."
Isabel Herrick studied her a little closer.
"You'd leave your country home for this?"
Rose turned upon her and towered above her. Her eyes flashed and her
abundant eye-brows drew down in a dark scowl.
"Would you be content to spend your life, day and night, summer and
winter, in Dutcher's Coolly?"
"Pardon me," said Dr. Herrick cuttingly, "the problem is not the same. I
have not the same——I——the question——"
"Yes, you who are born in the city and who come up to see us on the
farms for a couple of weeks in June—you take it on yourselves to
advise us to stay there! You who succeed are always ready to
discourage us when we come to try our fortunes. I can succeed just as
well as you, and I'll make you bow your head to me before five years are
gone."
Rose was magnificent, masterful. She was flaming hot with wrath. This
little woman had gone too far.
Dr. Herrick turned abruptly.
"I guess I've made a mistake; sit down again," she said, in softer
tones.
Rose was not yet done. She kept her lofty pose.
"Yes, you certainly have. I am not afraid of this city; I can take care
of myself. I wouldn't be under obligations to you now for the world. I
want you to know I'm not a beggar asking a dollar from you; I'm not a
school-girl, either. I know what I can do and you don't. I wouldn't have
troubled you, only for Dr. Thatcher." She moved toward the door,
gloriously angry, too angry to say good-day.
The Doctor's cold little face lighted up. She smiled the most radiant
smile, and it made her look all at once like a girl.
"My dear—I am crushed. I am an ant at your feet. Come here now, you
great splendid creature, and let me hug you this minute."
Rose kept on to the door, where she turned:
"I don't think I ought to trouble you further," she said coldly.
The Doctor advanced. "Come now, I beg your pardon. I'm knocked out. I
took you for one of those romantic country girls, who come to the
city—helpless as babes. Come back."
Rose came near going on. If she had, it would have lost her a good
friend. She felt that and so, when the Doctor put an arm around her to
lead her back to the desk, she yielded, but she was still palpitating
with the heat of her wrath.
"My dear, you fairly scared me. I never was so taken by surprise in my
life; tell me all about yourself; tell me how you came to come, where
you are—and all about it."
Rose told her—not all, of course—she told her of her college work, of
her father, of the coulé, of her parting from her father.
"O yes," the Doctor interrupted, "that's the way we go on—we new men
and women. The ways of our fathers are not ours; it's tragedy either way
you put it. Go on!"
At last she had the story, told with marvelous unconscious power,
direct, personal, full of appeal. She looked at Rose with reflective
eyes for a little space.
"Well, now we'll take time to consider. Meanwhile bring me something of
yours; I'll show it to a friend of mine, an editor here, and if it
pleases him we'll know what to do. Meanwhile, come and see me, and I'll
introduce you to some nice people. Chicago is full of nice people if you
only come at them. Come and see me tomorrow, can't you? O you great,
splendid creature! I wish I had your inches." She glowed with
admiration.
"Come Sunday at six and dine with me," yielding to a sudden impulse.
"Come early and let me talk to you."
Rose promised and then went out into the waiting room.
"Etta, dear, this is Miss Dutcher; this is my sister. I want you to know
each other." The little girl tip-toed up and took Rose's hand with a
little inarticulate murmur.
There was a patient waiting, but Dr. Herrick ignored her and conducted
Rose to the door.
"Good-bye, dear, I'm glad you came. You've given me a good shaking up.
Remember, six, sharp!"
She looked after Rose with a wonderful glow in her heart.
"The girl is a genius—a jewel in the rough," she thought. "She must be
guided. Heavens! How she towered."
When she stepped into the street Rose felt taller and stronger, and the
street was less appalling. She raised her eyes to the faces of the men
she met. Her eyes had begun their new search. The men streamed by in
hundreds; impressive in mass, but comparatively uninteresting singly.
It was a sad comment upon her changing conceptions of life that she did
not look at the poorly dressed men, the workmen. She put them aside as
out of the question; not consciously, for the search at this stage was
still unconscious, involuntary, like that of a bird seeking a mate,
moved by a law which knows neither individuals nor time.
She saw also the splendor of the shop windows. She had a distinct love
for beautiful fabrics as works of art, but she cared less for dress than
one would suppose to see her pass lingeringly before great luminous
cataracts of drapery. She was quietly dressed, and gracefully dressed,
beyond this she had never cared to go, but she constructed wonderful
homes and owners out of the glimpses of these windows, and from the
passing of graceful young girls, clothed like duchesses, and painted
(some of them) like women of the under world.
It all grew oppressive and disheartening to her at last, and she boarded
a State street car (the only car she knew) and took her way up home. All
the people in the car looked at her as if she had intruded into a
private drawing room.
She was evidently from the country, for, though it was in the day of
quaintness, she wore her hair plain. It was also the middle period of
the curious and inexplicable little swagger which all duly-informed
girls assumed, but Rose walked on her strong elastic feet with a
powerful swing which was worth going miles to see. It was due to her
unconscious imitation of the proud carriage of William De Lisle. She
loved that forward swing of the thigh, with the flex of the side which
accompanied it. It was her ideal of motion, that free action of knee,
waist and neck, which she felt rather than saw in the great athlete.
She made a goodly figure to look at, and it was no especial wonder that
the people in the car faced her. Her forehead was prominent and her eyes
were sombre. It was impossible for the casual observer to define why she
made so marked an impression upon him. It was because she was so fresh
and strong, and unaffected and unconscious.
Pure men did not smile at her as they might at a pretty girl. They
looked at her with wide, quiet eyes, and she knew they meant to be
perfectly respectful. There was one man looking at her like that when
she looked up to pay the conductor. There was a deep sorrowful look in
his eyes, and his face, too, was sad.
She did not understand his mood, but was moved by it. When she looked at
him again he dropped his eyes to his paper. He was a large man of thirty
or more, and had a rugged, serious face. She remembered it long
afterwards.
At lunch she found no one but Mr. Taylor. He loomed up at the further
end of the table, his gaunt, grave face and broad shoulders towering up
like a farmer's. She studied him closely, now that she knew more about
him. He had a big, wide, plain face, with gentle gray eyes. His beard
was trimmed round and made him look older than he was. He was a man into
whose eyes women could look unafraid and unabashed. He greeted Rose with
a smile.
"I'm very glad you've come. I was afraid I should eat lunch alone. With
your permission I'll move down to your end of the table."
Rose was very glad to have him take a seat near, and they were friends
at once. They naturally fell upon Mary as a topic. Mr. Taylor spoke of
her quietly:
"Mary's a fine girl," he said. "I don't like to see her work. I don't
like to see any woman do work like that. I don't claim any right to say
what women shall do or not do, but I imagine they wouldn't go into shops
if they were not, in a way, forced into it."
Rose defended the right of a girl to earn her own living. He hastened to
explain further:
"Of course a woman should be free and independent, but is she free when
pressure forces her into typewriting or working in a sweat-shop?"
Rose turned his thoughts at last by asking about the West. He expanded
like flame at the thought.
"Ah! the old equatorial wind is blowing today, and my hair crackles with
electricity." He smiled as he ran his hands through his hair. "On such
days I long for my pony again. Sometimes, when I can't stand it any
longer, I take a train to some little station and go out and lie flat
down on the grass on my back, so that I can't see anything but sky; then
I can almost imagine myself back again where the lone old peaks bulge
against the sky. Do you know John Muir and Joaquin Miller?"
Rose shook her head. His eyes glowed with enthusiasm.
"There are two men who know the wilderness. Your Thoreau I've read, but
he don't interest me the way these Rocky Mountain fellows do. Your
eastern fellows don't really know a wilderness—they're sort o' back
pasture explorers. John isn't a bit theatrical, he's been there. He
doesn't take a train of guides to explore a glacier, he sticks a crust
of bread in his belt along with a tin cup, and goes alone. I've been
with John in the Sierras, and once he came over into my range."
Rose defended Emerson and Thoreau as if she were the easterner this
Colorado hunter considered her. As she talked he fixed great
absent-minded eyes upon her, and absorbed every line of her face, every
curve of her lips—every changing wave of color.
"I don't care for the wilderness as you do. What is a bird compared to a
man, anyway? I like people. I want to be where dramas are being played.
Men make the world, bears don't." She ended hotly.
He slowly withdrew his gaze.
"I guess you're right." He smiled a wise smile. "If the wilderness had
been everything in the world, I wouldn't be here. A woman is more than a
flower. A woman would make my mountains a paradise."
"You have no right to ask a woman to go there with you—not to stay,"
she added quickly.
His smile passed.
"You're right again. Unless I could find a woman who loves the
wilderness as I do."
"That is out of the question," she replied. "No woman loves the
wilderness—as a home. All women love cities and streets and children."
She had a young person's readiness to generalize, and pitilessly flung
these hopeless truisms at him. He arose, apparently made sadder by them.
He sighed.
"But civilization carries such terrible suffering with it."
Rose went to her room and looked at her other letters of introduction.
Should she present them? What would be the use. The scene with Dr.
Herrick had not been pleasant; true, it had apparently brought her a
friend, but it was a rigorous experience, and she hardly felt it worth
while at the moment to go through another such scene to win another such
friend.
She fell to looking over her manuscripts. They were on lined paper,
stitched together at the top. They were imitative, of course, and leaned
toward the Elizabethan drama, and toward Tennyson and Mrs. Browning, so
far as verse-form went. There were also essays which she had written at
college, which inquired mournfully, who will take the place of the
fallen giants, Bryant, Longfellow, Emerson? She had eloquent studies of
Hugo and valiant defences of Dickens. She reflected in her writing
(naturally) all the conventional positions in literature. She stood upon
the graves of the dead as if she feared they might be desecrated.
She was a pupil, and as a pupil she had considered literature as
something necessarily afar off, in England or France, in Boston and
Cambridge, though she had come to think Chicago might be a place
suitable for a humble beginning, but that it might be the subject of
literature had not occurred to her. She had never known a person who had
written a book. Professor Ellis and the President had written scientific
treatises, but, not being a fool, she knew there was a difference
between getting an article into a country weekly and getting into a big
daily, to say nothing of the great magazines. She wished for advice.
Being out in the world now, something must be done with her writings.
These essays were good and thoughtful, they represented study and toil,
but they did not represent her real self, her real emotions, any more
than her reading represented her real liking. Her emotions, big, vital,
contemporaneous, had no part in this formal and colorless pedantry. Of
this she was still ignorant, however.
She was sorting her poems over and dreaming about them when Mary came
home.
"O, you dear! I've been thinking about you all day. Did you see your
woman doctor?"
"Yes."
"Did you like her?"
"Well, I don't know—yes, I think I do. I didn't at first."
"Where else did you go?"
"Nowhere. I came home to lunch."
"Eat alone?" Mary was taking off her things and was more than usually
fragmentary.
"No. Mr. Taylor was there." Mary faced her.
"Now see here, Rose Dutcher, do you want to break my heart into
smithereens? If you do, you go on lunching with Owen Taylor."
Rose laughed at her tone of simulated sorrow and dismay.
"He moved down to my end of the table, too."
Mary plumped into a chair and stared.
"Well, that finishes me. I'm coming home to lunch after this. If you
prove a terrater, I'll have your back hair, Rose Dutcher."
"I couldn't help it. He didn't want to shout at me across the table."
Mary's voice softened.
"What did you talk about?"
"He talked about you."
"Did he? What did he say?"
"He said you were a good girl, and you are."
"Is that all?"
"What more could you ask?"
"He might 'ave praised me beauty!" Then she laughed and rushed at Rose
and hugged her for some reason not expressed.
"Isn't he just grand?"
"I'm going out to dinner Sunday night!"
"Where? Woman doctor's?"
"Yes. I met her sister, too."
"O, you'll soon be getting so swell you won't notice us. Well, anyhow,
you'll leave me Owen?"
In the mood in which she went to sleep that night, there was no
premonition of conquest. The tide of her life sank low. It was
impossible for her to succeed—she, a little country girl, of five feet
nine. She looked at her bulk as it showed under the quilts. How small a
thing she was to be set over against the mighty city.
And yet Napoleon was less than she. And Patti and Edwin Booth were not
so large. The life of a great actor, like Edwin Booth, a singer, like
Patti, interested her deeply. She wondered that they could do things
like other people. They were so public, so admired, so lifted into the
white-hot glare of success.
She brought her mind back to the point. They succeeded, small beings
though they were, they faced the millions of the earth and became the
masters, the kings and queens of art.
By what necromancy did they do this? If it was born in them, then there
was hope for her; if they reached it by toil, then, surely, there was
hope for her.