It was November. Rose and Julius had returned
to London to continue their felicity in a
new sphere: they were quite a model couple,
and were so happy that several people "of
experience" shook their heads sceptically, and
exclaimed:—"Ah, well! early times yet, early
times!"
What a world of envy in a little phrase!
Meredith Vyner grew morose. His domestic
comfort was now utterly destroyed, for his wife
was entirely estranged from him; and he was
without hope of her ever returning to the former
state of hypocritical fondness. Beyond this,
Violet would not remain in the house with her
step-mother; so that except in his visits to
Rose he saw no one that he loved. Blanche was
also separated from him: her husband absolutely
interdicted all communication between her and
her father. This was the result of a violent
quarrel on the old subject of his gambling, and
of her father's attempt to get her from him.
Cecil's passion for gambling had returned
with more than its former force and recklessness.
Vyner had discovered it; had suppressed
the allowance; lectured Cecil sharply, and
endeavoured to persuade Blanche to leave him.
A complete rupture was the consequence.
The miserable old man saw his daughter's
impending ruin, and saw that he was impotent
to save her from it. This, added to his domestic
sorrows, made him morose. He was a changed
being. He became dirtier and dirtier. He
never quoted Horace. The dust collected on
his manuscripts like the grains of snuff upon
his waistcoat, without any effort on his part to
shake them off. Life to him was purposeless,
joyless.
Mrs. Vyner was as lively and dissipated as
ever. No care sat upon her brow; no sorrow
darkened her existence. For some weeks after
the scene between her and Maxwell, he ceased
to see her; a circumstance which made her
husband for a moment rejoice; he believed that
a rupture having taken place, his wife would
return to him. The hope was not of long
duration. She, at first indifferent, became at
last uneasy at Maxwell's absence. She loved
him, she was accustomed to his presence, she
liked the excitement of his love, with its fierce
whims, its brutal expressions, and its passionate,
unrestrained vehemence. She missed him.
Unable longer to bear his absence, she wrote
a long and touching letter, in which real feeling
aided her natural adroitness, and gained the
victory.
Maxwell was on the point of giving way,
when it reached him. Obstinate, violent, and
revengeful as he was, he too was so uneasy at
being absent from her, that he was glad to have
such an excuse for forgiveness. He felt as if
he could have stabbed her to the heart; yet he
was softened in an instant by her letter.
Peace was made between them. He promised
never again to doubt her love; she
promised never again to offend him. Things
resumed their old course; yes, even to the
renewal of his jealousy and his threats; but on
the whole Mrs. Vyner's brow was smooth!
Not very long after the reconciliation, they
were together at a party at Mrs. Langley
Turner's. Among the company there happened
to be Lord * * * *, notorious in his early days
for his successful gallantries, and not having
yet relinquished the ambition of making
conquests. He sat next to Mrs. Vyner, who was
that evening in high spirits, and looked
enchantingly piquante. She was a violent radical
in her opinions, and a great tuft-hunter; a title
was always resplendent in her eyes, no matter
what the wearer might be like. It is easily
conceivable therefore, how, both as a coquette
and a tuft-hunter, she should have been
inordinately gratified at the attentions of Lord
* * * *. She put forth all her fascinations;
and although from time to time she met the
dark scowl of Maxwell, who was observing her
like a panther watching from his jungle, she
only answered his anger with a scornful smile,
and continued her attentions to the old nobleman.
As Maxwell saw her rise to depart, he hurried
down stairs to the cloak-room, and there
awaited her with the intention of expressing
his anger, as he handed her into the carriage;
but to his rage he saw Lord * * * * accompany
her down stairs, gallantly cover her white
shoulders with the shawl, and then handing
her to the carriage, take leave of her in the most
significant manner.
Maxwell with difficulty restrained himself
from challenging his rival on the spot.
The next day when he called on Mrs. Vyner,
he saw a cab drive from the door: it was Lord
* * * * coming from his first visit. Maxwell
refused to go in.
Day after day he saw that cab standing
there for an hour or two together; he waited in
the street the whole time, and in his
impatience the hour seemed quadrupled. It was
enough to irritate the least jealous of men;
him it drove to phrenzy.
Pale with passion he at last went in, and
found the two together. She received him
with easy unconcern, as if he were no more
than an habitué. Lord * * * * looked somewhat
"glum" at his presence, and after a few
commonplaces, rose and departed.
"So," said Maxwell to her when they were
alone, "my place is taken, is it?"
"What! jealous again?"
"Not jealous, but convinced."
"Convinced of your own folly?"
"Yes."
"Then, there are hopes of a reformation.
George, don't scowl in that way; you are not
handsome at any time, and when you scowl,
least of all."
"Mary, you must see him no more."
"Him? explain: I hate enigmas."
"Lord * * * * I insist upon it."
"Now, don't be absurd, pray! Why should
I not see a man old enough to be my father?"
"But not too old to be your lover."
"The old story! What a queer creature you
are! Why, who ever could suppose there was
danger in a man of his age—he hasn't an
unbleached hair on his head."
"Perhaps not; but a coronet hides that."
"Ha! ha! ha! Oh, you green-eyed monster!
Really, you are capital fun, though you
don't mean it."
"Beware, beware!"
"Ah! now you are getting tragic ... have
you an unloaded pistol about you by chance?"
A dark smile passed over his face.
"Mary, listen to me: I am very serious.
Laugh, if you please, at my jealousy, but at
any rate, acknowledge that I have a right to
insist on a cessation of his visits."
"I acknowledge nothing of the kind. Why
am I to be deprived of seeing whom I please?
My husband does not object to my receiving
Lord * * * * why should you?"
"Because you take pleasure in those visits."
"I do."
"They flatter you."
"They do."
"He flatters you."
"He is gallant enough to find my society
agreeable—that is more than I can say for
yours at this moment."
"You think it a feather in your cap to have
a worthless old nobleman dangling after you."
"Perhaps I do; what then?"
"I will not allow it."
"Come, come; this is getting a little too
imperious."
"I will not allow it, I say."
"Your permission is not necessary."
"I tell you it shall not be!"
"George—I am serious now—as you raise
your voice—if you know me, you must know
that I may be persuaded to anything, but I am
not to be driven. Obstinacy may not be an
amiable quality; but it is a quality which
belongs to me. Cease that tone of command
therefore; you will get nothing by it."
"I shall not cease that tone. I shall adopt
any tone I please."
"Do so; then don't wonder if I refuse to
listen to you."
"But, by God! you shall listen."
"Try me."
Her eyes dilated as she said this, though her
voice was perfectly calm. She was getting
almost as angry as he was. The spirit of
opposition was abetted by the resolution she
had formed not to rebut the attentions of
Lord * * * *, and she now was roused for
the struggle.
And yet, flattered as she undoubtedly was,
by the admiration of the old roué, she loved
Maxwell well enough to have sacrificed that
delight, had he taken another course, had he
implored instead of threatened; but that was
not in his nature, and his brutal imperiousness
roused her to rebellion.
He had become livid with passion, and it
was only with great effort that he could
articulate—
"Don't play with me ... you know not the
danger ... I warn you ... I warn you."
"And I laugh at your threats."
"You think I am not serious?"
"I do not care a straw whether you are
serious or not."
"You are resolved then?"
"Quite."
"Oh, beware! beware! do not drive me to
the last extremity...."
She shrugged her shoulders.
"By God!" he exclaimed, striking a small
table with his fist.
"See," she said, "you have broken my china—a
real bit of rococo; that's what it is to be
ungentlemanly and violent."
"Mary ... This is .... You are rushing to
destruction! Look here; I am almost mad
... but I know what I say ... choose whether you
will obey me—if you do not, as I live, I will
blow your brains out, and then my own!"
"Mr. Maxwell, if you think I am to be
frightened by your ravings, if you think I am
to obey your ridiculous caprices, if you think
you are to be my master, you are egregiously
mistaken. Leave the house: I hate you!"
Her look expressed her hate, as she said this.
He was convulsed; the veins started on his
forehead; his chest heaved laboriously, and his
eyes were dilated with fury, but he uttered no
sound.
"Your love is degradation! Your soul is as
ignoble as your manners are brutal! I have
put up with this too long. I have been
contaminated by your presence, and now, I hate
you!"
A sort of gurgle, like the death rattle, sounded
in his throat; his face was purple.
"I hate you!" she added. "Is that clear?
Do you understand me now!"
With his eyes fixed horribly upon her
furious countenance, he put his handkerchief
to his mouth; when he removed it, she saw
that it was stained with blood.
A sudden sickness overcame her, and she
trembled.
He did not speak another word, but staggered
rather than walked towards the door. Slowly
he descended the stairs, and with his handkerchief
still at his mouth reached home. The
paroxysm of passion had burst a small bloodvessel.
Left to herself, Mrs. Vyner sank on a couch
shivering, and her teeth chattering together
from the combined effects of rage, excitement,
and fear.
The heavy pall of a terrible doom seemed
stretched over her future: dark, mysterious,
and awful. She shuddered as she thought of
what had passed, and only recovered a slight
decree of calmness as the thought occurred to
her that perhaps that broken bloodvessel might
put an end to him!
For what will love's exalting not go through,
'Till long neglect and utter selfishness
Shames the fond pride it takes in its distress?
LEIGH HUNT.—Rimini.
Cecil had removed to miserable lodgings at
Hammersmith, consisting of two rooms, and
those wretchedly furnished; he had also reduced
his expenses by giving up his atélier, and was
now, without pretence at concealment, a gambler,
and nothing else.
Blanche's grief when she first discovered his
relapse was not so great as might have been
expected, simply because she had to defend him
against the bitter accusations of her father, and
in the effort to excuse her husband in the eyes
of another, she succeeded in greatly excusing
him in her own.
There were doubtless many sleepless nights
she had to pass, moodily contemplating the
probable consequences of their fate; but when
Cecil came home, her sorrow fled. Either he
had won, and then his gaiety charmed her, and
she allowed herself to be seduced into sharing
his sanguine expectations; or else he had lost,
and then she had to comfort and console him,
and in that effort to assuage his grief, forgot her
own.
There was something indescribably affecting
in the tender solicitude and unshaken love of
this gentle creature for her wretched husband;
she had truly married him for better and for
worse, in sickness and in health, in joy and in
sorrow, and no adversity could alter the current
of that love, which flowed from the everlasting
fountain of her heart. He had blighted her
youth; he had blighted the existence of their
child; but she loved him perhaps still more
dearly than on that happy day when the priest
had joined them at the altar. He had been
weak, contemptible, even infamous; but he had
never ceased to be the idol of her heart.
One day she missed her watch; that watch
which Cecil had given her, and which had
always been at her side. She hunted about the
house for it. All day she was in great distress
at having lost it, and endeavoured in vain to
persuade herself that perhaps Cecil had taken
it out with him. He returned at two o'clock in
the morning. Her first question was,
"Darling, have you my watch?"
"No," said he sulkily.
"Oh, dear! oh, dear! it is lost, then—I have
lost it—some one has stolen it!"
"Pooh! don't make a fuss—it's all right."
"Have you got it?'
"No; but I know where it is."
"Where?"
"In a place where it is quite safe—never
fear!"
She understood him. He had pawned it,
and the proceeds had gone where every shilling
went.
Another day she missed the baby's coral with
its golden bells. This time she said nothing;
she knew too well what must have become of
it, and she burst into tears as she thought of
the fearful situation of a father robbing his own
child to feed an infatuated passion!
One by one, every article upon which money
could be raised had disappeared, until he possessed
literally nothing more than the clothes he
stood up in.
It was in vain she argued with herself that he,
as the master, had a right to sell his own property,
to sell anything and everything he pleased;
she could not drive away the idea of there being
something sneaking in this furtive disposal of
his goods; an open sale might be necessitated,
but this silent disappearance by stealth of
article after article was horrible. She never
knew what was gone until she wanted it; and
at last her uneasiness became so great that she
trembled to seek the most trifling thing.
Blanche's eyes were not shut to all the weakness
of her husband's character, though her
affection made her sophisticate with herself to
an extraordinary extent. She saw the deplorable
effects of his infatuation, and tried her best
to wean him from it; but she always trusted
that he would see the folly of the pursuit, and
that, after a certain amount of experience, he
would be cured. Meanwhile, that hope grew
fainter and fainter, as time, instead of lessening,
seemed to increase his passion.
To Vyner, Julius, Rose, and Violet, it seemed
perfectly incomprehensible that Blanche should
continue to love such a wretch as Cecil.
"His conduct," Vyner would say, "is enough
to have estranged an angel."
Yet the fact is, that his conduct had not in
the least degree alienated her affection from
him; and the explanation of this fact resides
in the moral axiom (the truth of which a large
experience of human nature cannot fail to
illustrate), that affection depends upon character,
not upon conduct.
We love those most with whom we sympathize
most, not those from whom we have
received the greatest benefits. The husband
who ill-treats his wife (as people say) is often
idolized, while the husband who idolizes his
wife is often looked upon as a "good sort of
person" at the best. No doubt, the ill-treated
wife suffers from, and resents each act of
ill-treatment; as the kindly-treated wife is pleased
and grateful for each act of kindness; but in
the one case, occasional acts cannot destroy
that sympathy which is the bond of love; nor
in the other case, can the occasional kindnesses
create it. Again, I say it is character, not
conduct, which creates affection.
It was Cecil's character that Blanche
sympathized with. His affectionate, caressing
manners—his gaiety, his cleverness, and as she
thought genius, were qualities the charm
of which could not be resisted. Then he
loved her so truly! not enough, indeed, to
forego, for her sake, the excitement of the
gaming-table: not enough to prevent his
sacrificing her with himself to this infatuation: but
that was because he was incapable of self-mastery.
And if he was weak, she sympathized
with his weakness.
Turn the phrase how we will, it always comes
back to these simple pregnant words: she loved
him!
O why, when Love doth wound, doth it not then
Strike deeper down—and kill!
Old Play.
There was not a farthing in the house. Cecil
was out on the chimerical expedition of
borrowing a few pounds from one of his gaming-table
acquaintances. Continual assistance had
been lent them by Vyner and by Julius; but,
of course, these sums were dissipated in the
usual way; and so recent had been the assistance,
that even Cecil had not the face to
apply again.
Blanche was weeping over the cradle of her
child, whom she had just rocked asleep, when
the door opened, and the servant put in her
head to say,—
"Please, mum, a gentleman."
In another instant, Captain Heath stood
before her with outstretched hand, and
embarrassed countenance: she grasped his hand in
both of hers and pressed it warmly, for she
felt that a deliverer was near. Since last they
had met, what changes in her life! What
had they both not undergone! He was much
thinner, and looked older. Sorrow had deeply
lined his noble brow, and dimmed his kind
blue eye. He had sought in travel to forget
the cause of his voluntary exile; and had
learned, if not to forget, at least to master his
feelings. When men have passed the
impressionable and changeable age of youth, love
becomes a more serious and enduring passion
with them—it becomes consolidated in their
manhood. And Captain Heath—too old not
to have lost all the volatility of youth, but
still too young to have lost its fervour—found
that his passion for Blanche was ineffaceable.
Had he, then, returned with any hopes?
No; his was one of those strong, brave, manly
natures which know how to endure any calamity,
any condition, so soon as it is recognised
as inevitable; they endure, without childish
repining, what they know must be endured;
they brace their minds to the struggle, and
they conquer at least that weak and fretful
anxiety which attends upon those who cannot
calmly look fate in the face.
He returned, but it was to watch over his
beloved; and on his return, what was his horror
to hear of the situation into which her wretched
husband had precipitated her!
Blanche was embarrassed, yet delighted.
From childhood she had known him, and
loved him almost as a father; and to her old
affection there was now added, the unconscious
flattery of her knowledge of his love for her.
No woman is ever insensible to such flattery;
the man who loves her, though hopelessly, is
always interesting in her eyes. Blanche was
eminently a woman.
"How kind of you to come and see us," she
said, "and in such a place as this! But then
you are one of our true friends, and poverty
cannot scare you."
"Yes, Blanche, I am your friend: always
remember that, and in any difficulty, be sure not
to forget it. But let me see your child: she
is asleep?—what a beauty! How you must
love it! Dear little thing, how quiet its
breathing! may I kiss it? will she wake up?"
"No; kiss her gently: she is so used to it!"
He stooped down, and kissed its warm, soft
cheek, and then gazed at it for some minutes
in silence. With a mother's pride, Blanche
watched him, occasionally looking down upon
her darling, with that yearning tenderness,
which only mothers know.
A low sigh escaped from him as he turned
away from the cradle.
"Have you been long in England?" she asked.
"I came home last week. This is my second
visit."
"Your first was to papa, I suppose?"
"Yes. Things are in a sad state there,
Blanche. Your father is very much altered.
But what could he expect? What could induce
him to marry again?"
"Mama's conduct is shocking!—To think
of a wife forgetting herself so!—Did you see
her?"
"Yes, and she was as civil to me as ever,
talked as hypocritically—and spoke of you in
terms that made me excessively angry."
"What did she say?"
"It was not what she said, so much as
the manner of saying it: the tone of pity,
of false pity, affecting to look upon you as
if..."
"And what... Did she speak of ... of Cecil!"
Heath was silent.
"Ah! I know she did; but you must not believe
her; indeed, it is not true—indeed, he is
not."
"Is it possible?"
"That is .... she must have exaggerated....
He has been imprudent, unfortunate.... but he
is the kindest, best of men.... They are all
against him; they do not understand him; they
require a man of genius to be as formal and
regular as other men .... absurd, is it not? .... Are
not all men of genius ... are they not?"
"Unhappily!" replied Heath.
"I know you would not join the cabal against
him. You are more liberal! Oh! if you knew
his heart, how good it is!—I wish he were
here..."
At this moment little Rose Blanche cried;
and her mother took her up. The little creature
was terrified at first seeing the captain,
and clung to her mother for protection; but
after a little coaxing, she became pacified, and
in a few minutes was in his arms and playing
with his dark moustache, which greatly interested her.
This interruption saved Heath from an
embarrassing situation, and threw the conversation
entirely upon the child, of whom the fond
mother had innumerable anecdotes to relate, all
of which went to the establishment of the fact,
that for intelligence and goodness, no such baby
was to be met with in the three kingdoms.
Heath was too happy to let the conversation
continue in that strain, and having spent an
agitated yet delicious hour with her, he thought
it time to go.
"My dear Blanche," he said at last, "I came
here upon a matter of business, which I must
not forget in the pleasure of seeing you. My
residence in Italy has developed in me a taste
for pictures. I am not rich; but I am alone in
the world, and can afford to indulge my taste.
Your husband is an artist, and I am come to
command a picture from him. I leave the
subject, size, and price, entirely to him. Let him
execute whatever his genius prompts him; and
I am quite sure I shall be the gainer by leaving
the price to him. Meanwhile, as you are not
in flourishing circumstances, here is a cheque
for fifty pounds, on account. When he wants
more, he knows where to apply."
He placed a cheque in her hand as he said
this. She understood but too well this
delicate mode of assisting them, and a tear rose
into her eye as she pressed his hand
significantly: she could not speak. He embraced
her child repeatedly, and, with a fond protecting
look, bade her good-bye.
Left alone, she burst into tears: they were
tears of gratitude and tears of shame: gratitude
for the beautiful and delicate friendship of the
act and its manner: shame at finding herself
reduced to such a state, that she was forced
to accept alms from her former lover.
As she grew calmer, the thought rose within
her, that perhaps this might be the saving of
Cecil—that he, finding employment, might
resolutely set to work, and—no longer forced to
seek a subsistence by gaming,—resume his
honourable career.
Building cloud-castles on the landscape of
the future, she was light and joyous when
Cecil returned, and flung herself upon his neck,
with almost frantic delight.
Cecil received those demonstrations of joy
with moody sullenness. He had returned
exasperated by failure, gloomy with the dark
thoughts which lowered upon him, like heavy
clouds collected over the sunny fields, boding
a coming storm.
"Blanche," he said, "we are beggars."
The smile was still upon her face; she pushed
the hair gently from off his forehead.
"There is no hope left. I have tried every body."
"I have had a visitor, darling, since you
went out. Guess who it was."
"Julius?"
"No."
"Your father?"
"No."
"A dun?"
"Captain Heath."
"The devil it was!"
"Yes; I thought it would surprise you. Oh!
I was so happy to see him!"
"Heath... here!" exclaimed Cecil, his cheek
burning as he spoke. "And you saw him? ... received
him here ... and in my absence? You
did?"
"Was I wrong?" she, trembling, asked.
"Wrong? Oh, no; it was not wrong to
receive your lover. You needn't start ... he is
your lover, and you know it! You know,
moreover, that I hate him... The scoundrel!
And he saw you here ... here, in this beggarly
place ... in this hole of poverty! And he
triumphed over me ... triumphed because his
prophecy was fulfilled! Didn't he, too, urge
you to leave me? Didn't he, too, tell you I
was a villain, dragging you to ruin? Didn't
he offer to take you home? .... Speak! don't
stare at me in that way! Tell me all the
scoundrel said ... quick!"
"Cecil, Cecil, down on your knees, and beg
his pardon for having so slandered him! You
are not in your senses to speak so—and of
him, of him!"
"Slandered him, have I? What! the
sneaking wretch who takes advantage of my present
situation...."
"To assist you!" indignantly exclaimed
Blanche.
"Assist me! and for what purpose? For
whose sake—for mine? No; for yours! Oh!
I see all his plans—I see them all!"
Cecil, mad with jealousy and rage, dashed
his hand upon the table, and swore a fearful
oath. It was not that he for a moment
suspected his wife; but he had never been able to
overcome his jealousy of Heath; and what
added tenfold torture to that venomous feeling
now, was the thought that Heath had come
back to find Blanche reduced to want—to find
her in this miserable lodging deprived of all the
comforts and necessaries of life. He felt
himself horribly humiliated in the eyes of his hated
rival; he felt that his rival triumphed over his
degradation; and he dreaded lest Blanche
should have made an involuntary comparison
between her present condition, and what it
would have been had she married Heath. All
this rapidly crossed his mind, and drove him
to fury.
"Cecil," she said, struggling with her tears,
"you are unhappy, and that makes you unjust.
If you but knew the noble nature of him...."
"Hold your tongue! Am I to sit here and
listen to his praises? Noble nature, indeed!
Yes, yes, I know it.... I know it."
"Then you know...."
"Silence, I say! Are you going to draw a
comparison between us? Are you going to
contrast his virtues with my vices? A good
subject, but a bold one for a wife to touch
upon!"
"Cecil, you break my heart... Will you hear me?"
"No!"
"What have I said or done...."
"You have received, during my absence, a
man I hate—a man who, if he again crosses my
threshold, I will throw out of the window."
"Look at this!" she said, presenting the
cheque to him.
"What is that?"
"If you will not listen to me, trust your own
eyes."
"A cheque for fifty pounds—and from him?"
"He came here to command a picture; you
are to name your own price; that is on
account."
Cecil took the cheque, looked at it, and
then at her.
"And do you believe this?" he said, with
intense calmness. "Do you really believe that
he wants a picture?"
"No; I believe that to be an excuse...."
"An excuse! By God! she knows it!"
"It is a delicate way of assisting us.—That
is the conduct of the man whom you have
outraged by your suspicions."
Cecil was stupefied. Her perception of the
subterfuge quite staggered him.
"So, so—he thinks to buy you, does he?"
he at last said, choking with rage.
She coloured deeply with shame, and exclaimed,—
"Oh, Cecil! Cecil!"
"Well then, to buy me! He thinks I am to be
patronized.... to be his workman.... to receive
his orders.... to receive his money! Blanche,
this cheque is either an outrage to you, or an
insult to me. Don't speak! .... Not another
word."
He rose, and put on his hat.
"Good God! Cecil, what are you about to do?"
"To find out this liberal patron."
"Cecil, Cecil! do be calm!"
"I am. I will fling this cheque in his
odious face, and tell him what I think."
She threw herself upon him.
"Cecil! my own darling! listen to your
Blanche.... For God's sake, be calm! ... Think
of me; think of your child! .... A duel! oh,
Cecil! could you leave your child fatherless,
Cecil?"
He flung her from him, and rushed out of
the house: she reeled and fell. The child
began to scream; the old lady living in the
parlours hurried up stairs, and found Blanche
lifeless on the floor.
Like a madman, Cecil bounded along the
streets, goaded by one of those irresistible
outbreaks of passion which sometimes mastered
him. On reaching the house where Heath
formerly lived, and hearing that he no longer
lived there, he remembered Heath having just
returned from abroad, and that his residence
could only be known at his bankers. Thither
he went: on his way he passed through
Jermyn-street. It was in that street was kept the
gaming-house where he had spent so many of
his days and nights.
A new direction was given to his thoughts:
insensibly they left the subject of Captain
Heath to merge into that of play. Still he
walked on, but less swiftly. The idea of the
splendid martingale he had recently discovered,
which this fifty pounds would enable him to
play, would not leave him.
He walked more and more slowly. Fifty
pounds—it might make his fortune.
After all, Heath might possibly have desired
a picture. The fool! as if he knew anything
about pictures—he, the heavy guardsman,
purchase pictures!
Yet, if he was rich, that was one way of
spending his money. There was nothing but
what was perfectly legitimate in an artist
receiving a commission;—all artists receive
them.
And with this fifty pounds a fortune was
within his grasp.
He no longer walked, he crawled.
This money was certainly his, if he chose
to take it; why should he refuse? To be
sure, the money of that scoundrel! All
an excuse, too: Blanche knew it was an excuse.
He quickened his pace again. He was at
the banking-house: he pushed the door, and
entered.
"I can return him the money to-morrow. I
will say Blanche changed it. Out of my
winnings I can repay it."
He handed the cheque to the cashier.
"How will you take it, sir?" demanded the
cashier.
"Gold," was the brief answer.
His eyes sparkled as the fifty sovereigns were
shovelled across the counter; and he left the
bank with lights dancing before him.
The fascination of the gaming-table was too
much for him; all his sense of dignity vanished
before it; even his very jealous rage seemed
thus powerless against it. Humiliated as he
felt at the idea of accepting charity from
his rival, he could not reject it when it came
to feed his passion for play. Although he had
not a farthing in the house, although utter
destitution threatened him, he would not, to save
himself from it, have accepted Heath's assistance;
but he could accept it when it enabled
him to play.
To one of his old haunts he went. The first
man he saw there was the large-whiskered,
jovial, and eccentric gentleman whom he had
noticed on the second evening: of his entering
a house of play: he had since lost sight of
him. The little man stroked his bushy whiskers
fondly over his face, and, offering Cecil a
pinch of snuff, expressed his pleasure at
meeting him again.
"Come to try the goddess, sir?" he inquired.
"Fickle goddess! now smiling, now frowning—quite
a woman! I am no great hand myself;
but, as far as a few crowns go, I find it a
pleasant game—decidedly pleasant. Would you
like to regulate yourself by my card?—duly
pricked, you see. There have been three runs
upon the black; once it turned up eleven times.
Shall we take a glass of wine together?
Yes;—waiter! some wine."
"No wine for me, thank you; I never touch
it before dinner. Have you seen Mr. Forrester
here to-day?"
"The gentleman with the large moustachios?—Yes;
he has been playing, and won; but he
went away about a quarter of an hour ago."
Cecil took his seat at the table. Gambling
by day has, somehow, a more hideous aspect
than by night: I suppose because it looks so
little like an amusement, and so much like
a mere affair of cupidity. But Cecil had
grown used to this, as to other loathsome
aspects of his vice, and sat down to the
table with as much sang froid as if he were
about to transact the most ordinary piece of
business.
He had not been playing long, winning and
losing in pretty equal succession, when Frank
came back.
"What, again!" said Cecil. "I thought
you had gone for the day: I heard you had
departed with your winnings."
"The fact is, that I found my winnings
rapidly decreasing, so I thought a little interval
might very properly elapse; after which fortune
again might be on my side. Besides, old boy,
you must know that I haven't dined for eight
days;—and when I say dined, I don't mean
dining in the true sense, but in the common,
vulgar, pauper sense of the word. I have
made no meal which could represent a dinner.
For eight days I haven't touched meat, damn
my whiskers! So, being as ravenous as a
hyena, I determined that to-day, at least, I
would dine."
"And have you?"
"Have I, Cis? Why it's not yet five: do
you imagine that under any circumstance I
could lower myself so far as to dine at the
shopkeeper's hour? No, damn it! one may be
hard up, but one does not forget one is a
gentleman!"
"Have you ordered your dinner then?"
"More than ordered it—paid for it. I
went to the butcher's, and bought two pounds
of magnificent steak: this I carried to a small
Public, hard by, with the strictest injunctions
as to the dressing of it—saw the cook myself,
and am satisfied she knows what's what. It is
to be ready at half-past six precisely, with no
end of fried potatoes, and a bottle of their old
crusted, which I know from experience is a
wine that a gentleman can drink. The dinner
you will say is not epicurean, but at any rate it
is certain, because I have paid for it all. Now
I don't mind risking the rest of my winnings.
My mind is at rest: the baser appetites are
provided for."
He began to play also; and he won.
"I told you luck would change," he said.
But he soon lost again, and lost repeatedly.
"Never mind, I have secured a dinner for
to-day, which will last a week."
Cecil was equally unfortunate; the run
seemed to be decidedly against him.
At last Frank threw down his final half-crown.
It went like the others. He started
up, and hurried away, without saying good-bye;
indeed, giving no other expression of his feelings
than was convoyed in an energetic denunciation
of his whiskers.
Cecil played on; and as he saw the sovereigns
disappear in spite of his famous martingale,
his heart sank within him, and the gloom
of despair seemed to paralyse his mind.
Suffering horrible agony from the intense excitement
of each coup, he yet played mechanically, almost
listlessly, he lost, and won, and lost again,
with fearful alternation of sick despair and dull
joy. It was as if he were staking his heart's
blood on each turn.
Frank returned, not without a certain hilarity
in his manner.
"Where have you been?" Cecil faintly inquired.
"To my worthy host of the Coach and
Horses, at whose house my dinner is
commanded. It struck me that I could very well
dispense with wine to-day—the more so as it
costs six shillings a bottle, and here one gets it
for nothing—so I negociated with the worthy
publican, and sold him the wine back again for
two half-crowns. Here they are. What d'ye
think of that? Is that management of financial
difficulties, eh?"
A sickly smile was the only answer Cecil
gave, for at that moment he had just lost his
fourth coup running. The two half-crowns
seemed to bring back Frank's luck, for he won
rapidly; Cecil, who played the same colours,
also won. Winning and losing, and losing and
winning, so the game went on, with alternate
rising and falling of hopes, and in the rapidity
with which small gains mounted up to large
sums, and those sums dwindled down again,
crowding as much excitement as would have
filled a month of ordinary life.
"Done! cleaned out!" exclaimed Frank, as
he saw himself once more penniless.
A sharp pang shot across Cecil's face, as he
threw down his last sovereign on the red.
"Après," said the dealer.
Cecil had now only ten shillings remaining of
the fifty pounds. In breath-suspended agony
he watched the cards.
"Red wins!" said the dealer.
He breathed again, and looked round to smile
at Frank; but that worthy had again departed
to negociate the sale of his dinner.
Yes; this dinner, so cherished, so anticipated,
paid for in advance, on which the imagination
had luxuriated as on a kingly banquet;
this dinner was sold for a miserable trifle, that
he might risk one more coup at that table where
so many men had ruined themselves before!
Cecil continued in luck until Frank returned;
this time with no hilarity on his face, but a
quiet gravity, which seemed prepared for the
worst; and when he lost the last shilling he
broke out into a short, sharp, hysterical laugh,
and turning to Cecil, said with forced calmness,—
"I shall not dine to-day."
"Pleasant game this, sir," said the
bushy-whiskered gentleman, coming up to where
Frank sat, "take a pinch of snuff, sir?" Frank
accepted with grace, and began chatting
with the smiling gentleman, who was very
communicative, and informed Frank that he
had that afternoon won no less than ten
half-crowns by backing the red.
"Quite right, sir," said Frank, "red is the
colour."
"No doubt about it."
"Yes, yes. By the way, you haven't a half-crown
about you at this minute, have you? I
am cleared out for the day."
"Why, I certainly have such a thing, but..."
"Say no more, my dear fellow," said Frank,
shaking him warmly by the hand, "half a
crown will be abundance, I only want to try the
red once. I'm really obliged to you for the
offer of the loan, and shall accept it with
pleasure. Now-a-days one does not often meet
with such a trump! If ever you should run
low, you know, in me you will always find one
ready to reciprocate a civility."
The smiling gentleman rubbed his whiskers
and filled his nose with snuff; but he concluded
by slipping the half-crown into Frank's hand,
who instantly threw it on the red.
Cecil had thrown his last five pounds upon
the red, and with straining eyeballs watched
the falling cards.
"Black wins," said the dealer.
Frank saw the croupier rake away his
half-crown, and with it Cecil's five pounds.
A low cry burst from Cecil, as he learned
his fate; and, leaning his elbows on the table,
he let his head fall into his hands, and sobbed
aloud.
The dealers and croupiers, accustomed to
every expression of grief, sat with immoveable,
expressionless faces, pursuing their routine with
an indifference which was quite ghastly. The
players looked upon him with different
feelings: some with compassion, some with
contempt, some with sympathetic fear. But above
his wretched sobs were heard the unvarying
tones of, "Gentlemen, make your game; the
game is made."
Frank touched Cecil on the shoulder, and
beckoned him to come away. Mechanically
Cecil did so, and they stepped together out
into the dull, dismal, November evening, and
walked through the mist and lightly falling
snow, without uttering a word.
At Park Lane they parted; a pressure of
the hand was the only expression of their
feelings which passed between them. Sick at
heart, they both felt that nothing could be said
to comfort them.
The lights glimmered dimly through the dirty
air of that November evening, and the snow
fell, and the rain, and the whole scene was
drear and desolate, as Cecil wandered on,
crushed in spirit, savage from remorse,
exasperated by his impotent efforts to shake off
the galling remembrance that he was now
Heath's debtor—that he had taken his money,
and could not throw it back at him.
Wild thoughts of suicide chased across his
soul, like dancing lights over a bleak moor at
night; but they did not long abide with him.
O God! O God! that it were possible
To undo things done,—to call back yesterday!
That Time could turn his swift and sandy glass
To untell days, or to redeem these hours!
HEYWOOD.—A Woman Killed with Kindness.
When Blanche returned to her senses, she
found herself in the arms of her landlady, who
was bathing her forehead with vinegar and water.
"My husband!" she murmured; "where is
my husband?"
"Oh, he's not come back yet. There, you
are better now, aren't you?"
"Thank you; yes, I can walk now."
"Don't attempt it just yet."
"I must. I must go out."
"Go out such a day as this! Why, see
how it snows."
"I must. You see I can stand. Oh, pray
God, I may not be too late."
"But where do you wish to go, my dear?
Can't I send my girl for you?"
"Where? Where? Ay, indeed. He did
not tell me where. But then Cecil will not
know where to find .... Thank God! Thank
God!"
She sank down again upon the chair, relieved
of her terrible anxiety; for she doubted not
that if Cecil were unable to meet with Captain
Heath, he would soon grow calmer, and look
at things more rationally.
She waited for his return, however, with
extreme uneasiness, fearful lest he should not
have missed the captain; and dreading lest he
should still continue his jealous suspicions.
Free from all sentiment of jealousy herself, she
could not understand Cecil's excessive
susceptibility; and knowing Captain Heath so well
as she did, she was perfectly convinced that
her husband's jealousy was quite motiveless.
This made her feel secure on this subject.
Her deep sense of her own innocence, and of
Heath's high-mindedness, made her convinced
that Cecil must see the matter in its true
light, so soon as he should calmly consider it.
It was nearly seven o'clock before her anxiety
was relieved by hearing his knock at the door;
but she screamed with terror as he entered the
room. Although his coat and hat were covered
with snow, he had left his chest exposed to the
cold, and his shirt-collar and front were
dripping with wet. He had evidently been
altogether heedless of his person, and had given
no thought of protecting it from the weather.
His face was pale and haggard, his eyes dull
and blood-shot, his lips compressed—his whole
aspect that of one who has just committed
some fearful crime. She interrogated his face
with watchful terror. He avoided her eye.
He seated himself in silence, and began brushing
the snow off his hat. That completed, he
placed his wet feet on the fender, and looked
stedfastly at the fire.
Unable to bear this suspense, she went up to
him, and laying her hand upon his shoulder,
said timidly,—
"Have you seen him?"
"No."
She felt greatly relieved. He continued to
look at the fire, but gave no signs of wishing to
prolong the conversation. She drew a stool by
his side, and sat down upon it; and in silence
they both contemplated the evanescent shapes
in the burning coals.
Having sat thus for some time, Blanche rose
and went into the next room, and presently
returned with her baby in her arms, asleep, which
she gently laid upon Cecil's lap.
He turned a dull, sad eye upon her, inquiringly,
and then looked down upon the sleeping
infant on his knee.
"Unhappy child!" he said, and the tears
rolled down his cheeks, as he gazed upon the
sleeping babe, unconscious of the sorrow it
awakened in its father's heart, and the remorse
for infatuated villany, the consequences of which
must eventually fall upon its head.
"Take her away," he said, "take her away.
Why do you bring her to me?"
"To make you happy."
"To make me more miserable than I was
before—to reproach me—me, her father, that
she has not a better home, warmer clothing!
Take her away."
Blanche, sobbing, took the child and laid it
again in its cradle.
"Blanche you must write a note for me," he
said, after a pause.
"To whom, dearest?"
No reply.
"To whom am I to write?"
"To—Captain Heath!" he said, with an effort.
She started at the name, alarmed and wondering.
"What am I to say?"
"Whatever you please—you are sure to succeed."
"But tell me what the object is?"
"Money."
"Money?"
"For my picture—I am to paint him one,
am I not? he has ordered it. Well! I want
money in advance."
Blanche would have been highly delighted
at such a speech, had it been uttered in
a different tone, and had not Captain Heath,
already, that very day, given a cheque in
advance.
She made no reply.
"Well!" he said, "are you ready? Write
it at once."
"But the fifty pounds...."
"Gone! I met a man to whom I owed it—he
demanded payment—I was forced to let him
have the cheque. You can explain it all to
Heath, and tell him I must have ten pounds
more to buy materials with. Tell him what you
please, but get the money."
He resumed his contemplation of the fire
after this speech, and scarcely opened his lips
again for the evening. Blanche wrote the letter,
but it was with loathing, and she hated herself
while she was doing it, and was sure Captain
Heath would also hate her.
Glad as she would have been to see her husband
relinquish his absurd jealousy of the captain,
it came with quite a different aspect when
that relinquishment was not a matter of conviction,
but of degraded calculation. She guessed
at once the truth of the whole history; she saw
that Cecil had gambled away the fifty pounds,
and that he had not only reconciled himself to
it, but had made up his mind to extort from the
generosity of the captain certain sums which
would enable him to indulge his unhappy passion.
What a situation for a loving wife! Never
before, not even in his worst exhibitions of
selfishness and weakness, had Blanche despised
her husband; but she could not master the
feeling now; a lurking sense of contempt would
intrude itself upon her thoughts.
The letter was sent under cover to her father.
All the next day Cecil sat over the fire,
sometimes whistling, but mostly quite silent.
He was playing over again the games which he
had lost on the previous day: and now, as he
played them, he calculated rightly, and always
won.
Blanche observed that he exhibited singular
impatience for the arrival of the postman; and
when the day entirely passed over without
bringing a letter, he constantly muttered to
himself, "Very extraordinary!"
The next morning his impatience was greater,
and when the two o'clock postman brought a
letter for her from Rose, and nothing from
Captain Heath, he began to swear and mutter
to himself, till she was quite terrified.
He took up his hat and lounged out, without
saying a word as to where he was going.
About three, Captain Heath called. Blanche
was frightened lest Cecil should return and find
him there; and was also alarmed at the probable
storm which would burst upon her in
consequence of this visit.
Heath saw her embarrassment, and attributed
it to a sense of shame at her husband's conduct;
for the note was so incoherently written, that he
divined pretty nearly the whole truth of the
matter.
"I have brought a cheque for your husband,"
he said, "because I did not wish to trust it to
the post—also, because I wished to say a word
to you. Blanche, I take the privilege of an
old, a very old friend, to speak frankly to you;
therefore, you must not be offended with me
when I ask you to receive another ten pounds
in advance for the picture, besides the cheque
which your husband has requested. I mean
the second sum to be received by you, for
household expenses—to be kept a secret by
you—you can keep a secret from your husband,
can you not?"
"Why do you wish it?"
"Because, Blanche, affairs are not in a
flourishing condition with you at present; and
as your husband owes a good deal of money,
perhaps, if he knew you had this sum, instead
of allowing it to be devoted to your immediate
necessities, he might also play that away."
She blushed deeply, as she perceived that he
had guessed the truth.
"I wish, therefore, that you would give him
this cheque from me, which he has asked, but
that you would say nothing, if you can help
it, about the other sum. I am asking, perhaps,
that which I ought not to ask. I am overstepping,
perhaps, the bounds of friendship,
and interfering in domestic concerns where I
have no sort of right to interfere. But it is my
friendship which dictates the wish, and which
must be my excuse. I do not bind you to any
condition; I do not even wish you to keep the
matter a secret, if it is at all repugnant to your
feelings: but I would strenuously advise you
to do so. Act just as you think fitting and
proper; do not imagine that I wish in any way
to dictate to you; but, as a brother might
counsel you, I would venture to suggest, that
on many accounts it would be well if you did
not speak of this."
"Kindest, best of men!" she exclaimed,
pressing his hand. She could say no more.
He quietly laid the cheque upon the mantelpiece,
and slipped ten sovereigns into the
pocket of her apron. He then, to change the
subject, asked after Rose Blanche, who was
brought to him immediately.
Blanche, after a long struggle with herself,
at last said,—
"Captain Heath, you know me well enough
to believe that I am neither insensible to your
friendship, nor ungrateful for it—do you not?"
"Assuredly, dear Blanche."
"And if I were to say anything to you that
might look ungrateful, you would not believe
that it sprang from ingratitude? you would at
once see that I was forced by circumstances,
not by my own will?"
He shook slightly, as he answered,—
"I could not doubt you."
"You do not believe me to be capricious?"
"I do not."
"And if I were to beg you .... to .... if I
were to say.... do not come here any more....?"
Her voice faltered, and died away in a whisper.
He started as the words fell on his ear,
and turned first red, then pale again.
There was a moment of embarrassed silence.
"Oh! do not believe," she passionately
exclaimed, "that it comes from me; do not
fancy that I should ever.... But I cannot do what
my heart dictates: I owe obedience to another."
He saw at once what was in her mind; he
saw that Cecil's absurd jealousy was at the
bottom of her agitation: and in a low but firm
tone, he said,—
"Blanche, do not continue. I understand
you. I never was a favourite of his, and he
naturally enough does not desire my acquaintance;
in which case, of course, I must relinquish
the pleasure of seeing you. Do not sob,
Blanche—you cannot help this. Such cases are
frequent. I shall not regard you less—shall
not be less your friend, because I am not
permitted to see you. Perhaps, if he knew me
better, he might think otherwise of me; but
sympathy is not to be commanded, and too
many people dislike me, for me to be either
surprised or hurt at his opinion. Besides, I
have already interfered too much between you.
He thinks my conduct unwarrantable—perhaps
it was—and he dislikes me. There, you see I
look at the matter in its true light. I do not
blame you—I do not blame him. A husband
is not forced to accept the friends of his
wife."
At this moment Cecil returned.
Heath coloured as he saw him enter the
room; Blanche turned aside her head to
conceal her tears, but not before Cecil's glance
had detected them; a fierce pain shot across
Cecil's heart, as if a burning iron had entered
it, but with a hypocritical smile he extended
his hand to the captain, and expressed himself
delighted to see him.
The situation was excessively uncomfortable
for all three. The captain could not depart, it
would have looked so pointed, yet to remain
was torture. Blanche was terrified, and silent.
Cecil, who in an instant saw that Heath's
presence betokened a fresh assistance from him,
stifled the horrible jealousy which his presence
awakened, and resolved not to lose the benefit.
He began a common-place conversation, and
soon led it to the subject of the commissioned
picture, for which he declared he had been
inspired with a magnificent idea.
Heath's replies were brief and cold; but
Cecil was not to be daunted. So completely
had his vice corrupted him, that he had lost all
sense of dignity, and only looked upon the
captain as a victim from whom to draw sums of
money. That Heath loved his wife he knew;
and doubted not but that from such an affection
he should draw golden results. That Blanche
did not return the captain's love, he was firmly
convinced—and yet that conviction could not
allay his jealousy. Awful moral perplexity and
corruption! Despicable weakness and meanness!
Here was a man base enough to barter
his honour, yet not strong enough to resist the
petty irritation of the pettiest jealousy!
As the captain took his leave, Cecil said:—
"We are generally at home,—if you should
be in this neighbourhood, pray don't forget to
give us a look in. It is but a miserable place
to come to—but old friends, you know."
Blanche's eye met the captain's, and most
significantly expressed,—"Don't accept the
invitation."
Heath merely bowed his acceptance, and
departed, marvelling much whether it was
corruption or irony which dictated Cecil's
speech.
Cecil made no observation to Blanche
respecting the captain's presence; but took up
the cheque with delight, and forthwith proceeded
to get it cashed, and to carry the money
to Leicester-square, whence, after spending the
afternoon and night at play, with various
alternations of fortune, he came away a winner of
thirteen pounds.
He was in excellent spirits on his return
home. Blanche said nothing respecting the ten
sovereigns in her possession.
I am so well acquainted with despair,
I know not how to hope; I believe all.
DECKAR.
Oh! press me, baby, with thy hand,
It loosens something at my chest;
About that tight and deadly band
I feel thy little fingers prest.
WORDSWORTH.
Although the life of a gamester is full of
emotion, full of successes and reverses, the
incidents are all so very similar that I need not
enter into more details. Suffice it, that Cecil
made such frequent applications to Captain
Heath, that a point blank refusal came at last;
much to Blanche's satisfaction, for she deeply
felt the humiliation of seeing him plundered in
that shameless way to feed the gaming-table.
She knew that it was for her sake Heath gave
the money; and she knew that it only added
fresh fuel to her husband's unhappy passion.
The last few weeks had completely banished
from her heart all hope of an amendment. Not
only had Cecil shamelessly applied to Heath for
money in advance on a picture which he had
made no attempt even to commence; but he
had, by one act, opened her eyes to the extent
of his reckless infatuation.
It was about a fortnight after Captain Heath's
visit, when, as Cecil sat in his usual attitude
over the fire, indolently smoking a cigar,
Blanche said to him,—
"When are you going to paint that picture,
dearest, which you have engaged for?"
"In good time."
"But why not do it at once?"
"He did not stipulate that it was to be done
at once, did he?"
"No; but there can be no reason why you
should not do it. You have nothing else in
hand. Besides, when that is finished you can
paint another; and you know how badly we
want money."
"Badly enough, God knows!"
"I do not like to accept the advances he
makes us, when I see you not working at the
picture."
"Bah!"
"You must do it sooner or later; why not
now? Come, Cecil, make an effort—begin it."
"Begin when I haven't even money to buy
the necessary materials. Write to him and
tell him I have a splendid subject, but that
really——"
"That is unnecessary. I have money—I
will go and get you all you want."
"You, Blanche! And where did you get
money from?'
"Never mind," she replied playfully. "Perhaps
it was a little fairy. Enough that I have
some."
"Oh, I'm not curious; so that you have
got money, that is all I care about. How
much?"
"There again! Not curious! Why, you
are as curious as a woman. Don't inquire."
"Very well. Get me the things, that's all."
She went into the next room, and he heard
her unlock a drawer. He continued calmly
smoking; she put on her bonnet and tripped
down stairs.
No sooner did he hear the street door shut
than he rose and walked into her bed-room to
search for the money. He saw a drawer with a
key in it, but on opening it he found nothing
there. He next unlocked all the other drawers,
but without result.
There was nothing now in the room likely to
conceal any money, and he began to think that
perhaps she had only a few shillings, which she
had carried away with her. Almost mechanically
he opened the small drawer of her wash-hand
stand, and there he saw six sovereigns
glittering in the farther corner. His face
lighted up with a strange expression as they
met his eye, and rapidly clutching them, and
turning over the drawer to see if it concealed
any more, he took his hat, and was out of the
house in an instant.
When Blanche returned and found him gone,
her heart misgave her; with trembling limbs she
staggered into the bed-room—opened the
drawer—and saw her fears confirmed. It is impossible
to render the despair which seized her at
this discovery. That little incident was more
frightful to her, was more damning evidence of
the unconquerable nature of his vice than any
she had yet known; and helpless, hopeless she
sank upon the bed, not to weep, but to brood
upon the awful prospect of her life.
It was not grief which laid her prostrate, it
was a stupor: a dull, heavy agony, like a
shroud closing her from life, from hope, from
happiness. Before, her heart had been wrung;
she had been humiliated, she had been tortured;
but in the bitterest moments, she had never
been utterly prostrate,—never absolutely
without gleam of hope. Now, her husband stood
before her as irreclaimable,—marching with
frightful rapidity to his doom, and dragging
with him, a wife and child.
That child's cries on awaking, partly
aroused her. She felt the necessity for an
effort; she felt that another demanded she
should not give way to the stupor which
oppressed her. She put the child to her breast;
but, alas! the shock she had received had dried
up its life-giving fountains, and the disappointed
infant sucked in vain. Tears gushed
from her, as she became aware of this new
misfortune—tears, scalding yet refreshing tears,
which melted down her stubborn grief into
something more like human woe; and relieved
by them, she rose to make some food for the
hungry babe, whose impatient cries recalled her
to a sense of duties, which allowed not the
passive indulgence of sorrow. Cecil, meanwhile,
had lost the little treasure he had
obtained possession of in so despicable a manner;
and having lost it, remained sauntering about
the streets, without courage to return home to
face his wife. Exhausted at last by fatigue, he
came back.
Not a word passed between them. He got
into bed feeling humbled and exasperated, yet
not having courage even to put a bullying
face on the matter. She was brushing her
hair, and he heard the sighs which she
struggled to suppress, but he feigned sleep, and
would not hear them.
She crept into bed, anxious not to awake
him; and through the long night he heard her
weeping, so that it almost broke his heart: yet
he feigned sleep, and dared not speak!
From that time, there was always a sort
of barrier between them. A wall had grown
up between their loves, formed out of shame,
remorse, pity and hopelessness. They never
alluded to the incident which caused it; but
they both felt that it was constantly present in
each other's minds.
Their existence was wretched indeed. Vyner
and Julius took care that Blanche should want
for no necessities—food, clothing, little articles
of necessity were all regularly sent in by
them; and the rent was paid by Vyner
himself. But no more money could Cecil extort
from them on any pretext. They knew well
enough, that to give him money was only to
give him opportunities of playing, and so
they limited their charity to seeing that Blanche
and her child, were not in absolute want.
One day as Cecil was sauntering down Piccadilly,
he was astonished to see Frank Forrester,
in a superb cab, with tiger behind, drive up to
Burlington Arcade, and there, arrayed in dashing
style, step out as if the lord and master of
three thousand a year, at least.
The contrast between his appearance at that
moment, and the last time Cecil had seen him,
when in the final stage of seediness, he had
gambled away even his dinner, so amazed
Cecil, that he rubbed his eyes as one awaking
from a dream.
"Ah! Cis, my boy, how are you?" said
Frank, grasping him by the hand. "Why,
you're quite a stranger.—I am so glad to see
you. Flourishing now, damn my whiskers!
flourishing, Cis, as you perceive. Nobby style,
eh? Correct thing that, I hope."
"Quite—But whence this change?"
"Oh! tell you that presently. Just step up
the arcade with me.—I'm only going to look
in upon Jeffs, to see if Paul de Kock's last
novel has arrived, and then command me."
He put his arm within Cecil's, and marched
up the arcade, playing with an elegant watch-chain
which drooped from his waistcoat button,
and winking at every woman they passed.
When they turned into Jeffs' shop, that
worthy bibliopole, albeit accustomed daily to a
strange variety of customers, from noblemen
and their flunkies, to dingy, sallow, foreigners,
redolent of garlic, and bearded like pards,
opened his eyes at such a strange apparition
as the resplendent, insolent Frank, arm in
arm with the careworn, battered, shabby,
Cecil.
"Paul de Kock arrived yet?" said Frank.
"No, sir," replied Jeffs, "but we expect our
case to-morrow."
"I think your to-morrow never arrives—at
any rate, your case doesn't arrive with it. Is
your case a pleasing fiction, or a reality?"
"It will be here to-morrow, sir, I have no
doubt. In fact I expected it yesterday."
"Well, then, send me up Paul de Kock the
instant you get it; will you?"
"Certainly, sir."
"Come along, Cis, my boy."
"You are quite a grand seigneur, I perceive,
Frank," said Cecil, as they strolled out of the
shop. "Cab—tiger—chains—French novels—have
you come into an inheritance?"
"Something like it, but jump into my cab,
and I'll tell you all about it."
They got in, and Frank, handling the reins
with no small degree of pride, drove into the
Park, and thus explained his present fortune.
"The fact is, Cis, I have discovered the true
method of playing. I broke the bank at
No. 14, last Saturday; and have won no trifle
since. You see all the martingales yet invented
have some inherent imperfection. They go
smoothly enough in theory; but damn the
practice, say I!"
"Is not yours a martingale, then?'
"No: it is simply playing with skill. To
explain it in a few words: you know that there
are constantly runs upon a colour; sometimes
it is the red, sometimes the black. You also
know that they dodge about, and that the red
will alternately win and lose every successive
coup. My plan is to wait quietly while the
game is dodging, and directly I see a run, I
back in heavily. If the red has turned up
three times, the chances are, that there is to be
a run on that colour, and I back it till it loses.
D'ye understand?'
"Perfectly. But I don't so clearly see how
you must win at it."
"Bah—that's the very best proof! In every
martingale, don't you on the contrary clearly
see how you must win, but does that prevent
your losing when you begin to play? So, you
may not see how I must win, but I see how
I do win—that's enough for me."
They dined together that day, and Frank,
who had a box at Drury Lane, proposed that
Cecil should accompany him, but Cecil was
too unwell, and went home brooding on his
friend's prosperity, and playing imaginary
games with fantastic success.
All the next day he was moody and irritable.
He would not even notice his child, but walked
up and down his small room, or sat with his
feet on the fender, cowering over the fire, his
head buried in his hands.
Towards evening, he wrote to Captain Heath
a hypocritical letter, the object of which was,
as may be expected, to extract a few pounds
from him. He was less moody after sending
this off; but Blanche observed a strange
wandering in his thoughts.
On the morrow he received a cold, firm
answer from the captain, who stated that he
had already advanced as much money on the
picture as he could afford to pay for it, and
that he was therefore forced to refuse.
"Damn him!" Cecil muttered, as he read
the letter and crumpled it between his fingers.
Blanche guessed the contents by that action;
but she made no remark.
For at least an hour did he sit looking fixedly
on the ground, keeping the crumpled letter
in his closed hand; and then she saw him
slowly open it, smooth the paper, and examine
it attentively. While she was thus watching
his countenance, curious as to what could be
his motive for examining so minutely a
handwriting he knew, he suddenly looked up at her.
A strange expression distorted his face as he
shouted,—
"What the devil are you looking at me for?"
"I ... I ... Cecil..."
"You don't suspect anything, do you?" he
fiercely asked.
"Suspect, Cecil; and what?"
"What's that to you?" he said brusquely,
and again turned away his head.
She began to fear that he was getting insane.
"Are you not well, dearest?"
"No."
"What is the matter?"
"Nothing. Don't bother me! It must be
near dinner, is it not?"
"Yes. Are you hungry?"
"Very; go and see about it."
She left the room.
A few minutes afterwards he was seated at
the table, with Captain Heath's letter before
him, carefully copying the writing, and
comparing his copy with the original. He smiled
grimly at his own success; and after several
further trials, he forged a check for eighty
pounds, which he had just folded and thrust
into his waistcoat pocket, when Blanche
returned with the dinner.
His agitation and the eager manner with
which he caught up some scraps of paper,
and threw them into the fire, did not escape
her.
He sat down to dinner, but he could not
swallow a morsel; and his hand shook so, that
he dared not venture to raise it to his mouth.
"You are ill, dearest," she said. "I am
sure you are."
"Pooh! it's want of exercise. I will take
a walk."
"Do not go out such weather as this; see
how fast the snow falls."
"It won't hurt me. I must go out."
She dared not further interpose; and in a
few minutes he was gone.
Left alone, she meditated on the singular
change in his manner—on his fierceness when
he had observed her watching him—his
paleness—his agitation—and his throwing those
pieces of paper into the fire.
She opened his writing-case. There, among
some loose pieces of blank paper, she found one
with some writing on it. A film overspread
her eyes, as she recognised in it a copy of
Captain Heath's writing—so like it, that had
not the characters been traced on a stray slip
of paper, she could never have suspected it to
be other than his writing.
Rushing upon her like an overwhelming tide,
came the swift and terrible thoughts which
revealed that her husband had committed a
forgery. In the desperate hope that she might
not yet be too late to save him from the last
act—that she might yet meet him at the
banker's and save him—she threw a shawl
around her, put on her bonnet, and in an
instant she was in a cab driving furiously to
Charing Cross; in her anxiety too much
excited to feel the horror of her situation.
As the cab dashed round the corner, by
Charles the First's statue, she saw Cecil hurry
from Messrs. Drummonds' banking-house. She
saw no more: her brain swam round. When
the driver opened the cab door, he found her in
a swoon.
It did not last long: she recovered herself;
and wildly looking round her, remembered in
an instant all that had passed.
"To South Audley Street!" she impatiently
exclaimed.
To Captain Heath's she drove, and astonished
the servant very much by hurrying up
stairs, and rushing into the room as if life and
death depended on her speed.
"Good God, Blanche! what is this?" he
exclaimed, as the half lifeless woman threw
herself speechless into his arms.
It was a long time before she could speak;
and even then, in such incoherent sentences
that it was with difficulty Heath understood
what she meant to tell him; but he found that
it was something terrible, and about Cecil; and
he redoubled his attention, trying to piece
together into a coherent narrative, the broken
utterances of this wretched wife.
At last he understood her, and tears of deep
compassion stood in his eyes as he said,—
"Cheer up, dear Blanche, cheer up! It is
not so bad after all. You terrified me at first.
He has only drawn on me in anticipation. You
know I still owe him money for the picture,—he
has paid himself,—he was doubtless close
pressed."
"But," she sobbed, "he has forged."
"He has been irregular, that is all; he should
have warned me of it. However, now you have
told me, it is all safe. Quiet yourself."
"Oh, that I should have lived for this!"
"Courage, courage."
"Dishonoured! My Cecil dishonoured!"
"Not yet, Blanche. He has been imprudent,
that is all—imprudent."
"Dishonoured!" she exclaimed, distractedly.
"Do you not see, that now I am informed of
what has passed I shall be on my guard? He
has been imprudent; no one knows it but
ourselves. You can gently point out to him the
imprudence—and he is saved. Only yesterday
I heard of a situation for him in the Colonies—an
excellent place. Away from England, he
will have broken from his present connexion,
and lose his unfortunate habits. A new sphere
will call forth fresh energy. He may be saved
yet, Blanche; only take courage."
She took his hand, and kissed it in mute
thankfulness, but her sobs still tore her bosom,
and all his persuasion could not calm her.
Now that she felt the great danger was past,
she had time to feel the immensity of the
blow—she could grieve.
Heath allowed her to weep without trying to
soothe her; for he saw that the great crisis was
over; and silently compassionating the sorrow
of this broken-hearted creature, to dry whose
eyes, he would have sold the world, he sat by
her side holding her hand, from time to time
replying to its convulsive pressure.
She rose at last to go home. He accompanied
her to the door—saw her take Rose
Blanche from the servant girl, and cover it with
frantic kisses; and then departed sad and
thoughtful to his own solitary home.
He could not, in his sympathy with her, forbear
picturing to himself the contrast of what
her fate would have been had she married him
instead of Cecil; nor could he refrain from
bitterly commenting on the truth of his own
prophecies that Cecil would make her unhappy.
No lover ever believes that his beloved can
possibly be happy with his rival; but Heath had
too clearly read Cecil's character, not to feel
assured that, rivalry out of the question, Blanche
was badly matched in wedding one so weak
and selfish.
In one of the low gambling houses, in Leicester-square,
Cecil sat, as in a dream, risking the
fruits of his crime. His brain whirled round,
and his heart beat every time the door opened,
for he could not drive away the fear that his
forgery had been detected, and that they were
coming to arrest him.
He had dishonoured himself to play this new
game which Frank had explained to him, and
now that the crime was committed he could not
profit by it!
Such a game required, above all others,
consummate coolness, and self-mastery; Cecil was
more agitated, his brain was more confused
than ever it had been, and he played utterly at
random. It would be difficult to conceive
greater torture than that which he endured, for
he won without satisfaction, and lost with
agony; his brain was not so confused but that
he had a distinct perception of his situation,
and of the necessity for playing every coup as
if for life; but at the same time his brain was so
drugged with horror and despair, that his will
seemed paralyzed, and he was forced, as by an
unseen hand, into the ruin which he saw yawning
before him.
While the cards were dealt with mechanical
precision by the impassive dealer, and Cecil's
crime-furnished gold was passing away before
his eyes, visions of his happy youth, of his
early days of marriage, and healthy activity,
floated before his mind; and he, the gambler,
on the edge of that dark gulph which gaped
before him, turned back his thoughts to those
sunny days when his soul was stainless, and
his life was full of love and hope, of activity
and happiness; it was like a small wild flower
on a mass of loosening rock, which the next
gust of wind will quite unloosen, and tumble
thundering into the ravine.
He thought of his mother, and of her dying
injunctions, and her words of blessing fell upon
his ear, just as the dealer in his passionless
voice proclaimed,—
"Black wins."
And a heap of gold was swept away before him.
For hours did this tortured gamester play,
becoming gradually inured to the pain he
suffered, and deadened to the whispers of his
conscience.
It was now eleven o'clock. The room was
full of players. A succession of new faces
replaced those who one by one fell off, contented
with their winnings, or, and this was by far the
most frequent case, desperate from their losses.
But Cecil never moved. He called for wine
occasionally, but nothing interrupted his play.
His last three sovereigns were staked upon
the black: his life was on the hazard of that
one deal. Even the old players, accustomed to
every species of intense emotion, could not keep
their eyes off Cecil, as with parted lips, straining
eyes, and purple face, he watched the rapid
progress of the game. Intensely they felt the
moment was supreme.
He lost!
With a burst of uncontrollable despair, he
snatched the rake from the hand of the croupier,
who had just swept away his money, and
with both hands snapped it in two; a murmur
followed this act of violence, which only seemed
preparatory to something worse; but he glared
round upon the players with such a look of
mad fury that they were awe-stricken.
Instead of any further violence, however, he
broke out into a wild hysterical laugh, which
made their blood run cold, and staggered out of
the house.
In that moment which had preceded his wild
laugh, a vision of his young wife and child
destitute,—starving,—thinned with want and
sickness, had appeared to him, and, as in a flash,
revealed to him the hideous extent of his ruin.
Beggared, dishonoured, stained with a profitless
crime, nought remained for him but death;
and in death he resolved to still the throbbing
of his agony.
As he stumbled into Leicester Square, he ran
up against one of those unfortunate women,
who, flaunting in satin and faded frippery,
make the streets hideous after sunset.
"Now then, my dear, are you going to rush
into my arms without an invitation?
'Was ever woman in this humour wooed?
Was ever woman in this humour won?'"
The fumes of bad wine poisoned the breath
of the speaker, but the tones struck so strangely
upon Cecil's ears, that they arrested him even
on the path of death.
He seized her by the wrist, and dragged
her under a lamp-post. As the light fell
upon both their faces, and he recognised in
the wretched woman arrayed in the garb of
shame, the Hester Mason whom he had known
so prosperous and ambitious—and, as she
recognised in the emaciated haggard wreck
before her, the only man she had ever loved, he
gasped with inexpressible emotion, she wept
with intense shame.
Not a word passed between them. With a
suffocating sense of bitter humiliation, she
wrested herself from his grasp, and darted
down Cranbourne Alley. He put his hand to
his brow, as if to repress its throbbing, and
slowly walked on.
The cause of Hester's degradation was one
which always has, and one fears always will,
people our streets with those unhappy women,
whom the law refuses either to acknowledge or
to suppress—refuses either to protect or to
punish: a lasting stigma upon our civilization!
When Sir Chetsom Chetsom was killed, she
had to look about her for means of subsistence;
and at first imagined that literature would be
an ample field.
Thanks to the diffusion of knowledge, and to
the increasing taste for reading, it is now very
possible for man or woman to earn a decent and
honourable livelihood by the pen; but if possible,
it is not easy, and is always, with the best
of talents, eminently precarious. For a woman
still more so than for a man. Above all, the
woman must have good friends, must be
"respectable," and fortunate.
Hester had no good friends; she had many
acquaintances, but no one who interested himself
in her success, no one, at any rate, who both
could and would assist her. Moreover, she
was not "respectable;" and what was the
consequence? dissolute editors were afraid of her
contributions "on the score of morals."
To be brief, Hester struggled in vain to get
employment; and in great danger of starving,
she determined to go back to Walton. Her
father consented to receive his unhappy child,
and promised that "bye-gones should be bye-gones."
She had better have taken a situation as
servant of all-work in a lodginghouse, than have
returned to her home after what had occurred.
She found her father, indeed, glad enough to
receive her, and willing enough to forgive the
past, on condition of not absolutely forgetting
it: from time to time he could not refrain from
"throwing it in her teeth," when he was at a
loss for an argument or an invective.
This is always the case when a fallen daughter
returns home, or when she commits the one
unpardonable fault, and stays at home: her
parents, her brothers, and sisters—oh! especially
the sisters—never forget that fault. It is
held over her head in terrorem. It is an
ever-present warning and illustration. Bridling up
in their unshaken chastity—too often unshaken
because untempted—the sisters make her feel
in a hundred ways, that her fault is unpardoned
and unpardonable. Exasperated by this incessant
and unjust retribution for a fault which
the girl feels deserves more pity, she is at last
driven from home and takes refuge in the streets,
because her virtuous family cannot forget!
It has been often remarked that women are
more pitiless towards each other, on that very
point where common sympathy should make
them most tolerant; and little do they know
the extent of the mischief their intolerance
creates.
Hester had not to suffer from the sneers and
allusions of chaste and offended sisters, but she
had to endure worse—the sneers and slights
of the whole offended town. The reader
remembers how Walton was scandalized at her
flirtation, how shocked at her flight; let him
then imagine the howl of outraged purity
which saluted her repentant return! She,
indeed, come back to a town she had disgraced!
She to show herself amongst the daughters of
respectable people! She to be allowed to wallow
in corruption, and then as soon as she found
that course led to no good, to return again to
her home as if nothing had occurred! The
minx!
Mrs. Ruddles hoped her husband would take
notice of it from the pulpit: such an example
as it was to other girls!
Mrs. Spedley expected to see many imitations
of such conduct; it was such a premium on
vice!
The post-mistress hoped she was as charitable
as most people, but she knew what was due to
herself, and as long as that creature remained in
Walton, she, the post-mistress, could not think
of purchasing anything at her father's shop.
Nor, for that matter, could Mrs. Spedley.
Mrs. Ruddles had never for an instant
thought of such a thing. It would be a positive
encouragement. Mrs. Ruddles herself had
daughters. She knew something, she thought,
of what constituted a well-regulated mind.
She had no fears for her Arabella, Mary, and
Martha Jane; but Mrs. Ruddles knew the ill
effects of example.
When Hester appeared in the street, all the
women instantly crossed to the other side. If
she went into a shop to make a purchase,
the shop immediately became empty. Women
avoided her as if she were a walking pestilence.
En revanche the men ogled her with effrontery,
and even middle-aged rotundities with
large families, gave themselves killing airs when
in her presence.
The stupid ignorance of men! I declare the
older I grow the more amazed I am at the dull,
purblind, inexcusable ignorance in which one-half
of the human race seems destined to remain
with respect to the other half, in spite of all
experience. To meet with a man who has not
some gross prejudice, founded on the most
blundering misconception with regard to the
nature of women, and on that point, too, which
one would imagine they would best understand,
is really one of the rarest occurrences. The
vast majority of men never seem to escape
from the ideas they form about women at
school; and no contradiction in the shape of
experience seems to suggest to them that those
ideas are essentially false. To hear men—and
men of the world too—talk about women, is to
hear the strangest absurdities and platitudes
you can listen to on any subject; to be let into
the secret of their conduct towards women, is
only to see the ludicrous results to which such
erroneous opinions lead them.
It is a tempting subject, but I am not going
to pursue this diatribe. I have an illustration
to give instead.
Hester Mason having committed a faux
pas, was instantly, and from that very cause,
looked upon by all the men, young and old, as
a woman "to be had for the asking." In their
simplicity, they could admit of no gradations
between a Lucretia and Messalina. If a woman
were not as chaste as ice, she must necessarily
be utterly abandoned. If one man had succeeded
in overcoming her scruples, of course
another might. The dolts!
Perhaps it is owing to our prudery, which
keeps so strict a surveillance over every word
and act, that the smallest licence seems to
imply the extremity of licentiousness!
The school-boy notion of the facility of
women was at the bottom of their minds, and
with beautiful simplicity some of the "knowing
dogs" commenced the attack upon Hester's
virtue, without even thinking it necessary to
adopt a semblance of respect and attachment.
Certainly Hester was not a woman, under
any circumstances, to have admitted the
addresses of these men; but now, the undisguised
insolence and fatuity of their approaches not
only made her cheek burn with shame, but
made her heart sick with disgust.
With scorn and withering sarcasms she
discomfited them one after the other. The
contemptible fools instantly joined the chorus of
the women; and with good proof that at any
rate, she was not altogether abandoned, they
were unanimous in their execration of her infamy.
If women were not purer, stronger, and
honester than the dull and coarse imaginations
of most men depict them, what a world this
would be! what children would these women
bring forth!
Those men who have known women, known
how great their influence for good and for evil,
known what a well of feeling, of pure, spontaneous
nature, untarnished by contact with the
world, there lies hidden in a woman's breast;
those who have known how this nature has
moulded their own minds, refined its coarseness,
giving beauty to its strength, will exclaim with
me: what a world would this be were women
what men generally suppose them!
Here is Hester Mason, certainly not a good
specimen of her sex: vain, capricious, wilful,
sensual, perverted by sounding sophisms
respecting the rights of women, and the injustice
of the marriage laws; she acts up to her
opinions, and throws herself away upon a rich
and titled noodle for the sake of furthering her
ambitious projects; she finds out her mistake,
returns home repentant, and instantly a number
of ill-conditioned, coarse-minded, coarse-mannered
men imagine she cannot hesitate to
stoop to them! Believing that she acted from
unrestrained licentiousness, they interpreted one
act, in this school-boy fashion, and hoped to
profit by her weakness. But they found out
their mistake; or rather never found it out, for
they attributed her refusal to viler motives than
those to which they would have attributed her
consent.
The insult of their proposals struck deep into
her heart—deeper far than the scorn of her own
sex; and it made her so wretched, that, at last,
it drove her once more from her home. Yes,
home became insupportable, and in a moment
of desperation she fled; fled to London, and
there endeavoured to seek oblivion in the
turbulent vortex of a career which one shudders to
contemplate.
Of all the tortures, of all the humiliations to
which she had submitted, none equalled that of
meeting Cecil. In her strange unhappy life
there had been but one short dream, and that
was her love for Cecil; even when he had
rejected her love, and humiliated her by his
rejection, she still felt towards him something
of that elevating, purifying attachment which
forms a sort of serene heaven smiling upon the
most abject condition—which is, as it were, the
ideal region where the purest, brightest thoughts
take refuge. And to meet him in the streets—to
appear before his eyes in the flaunting finery
of disgrace—to let him see the abyss into which
she had fallen! Poor girl! if her errors had no
other expiation than that, bitterly would she
have expiated them.
While the wretched girl wandered distractedly
on her way, goaded by the pangs of shame and
remorse, the still more wretched Cecil, calm in
his concentrated despair, was walking along the
river side, pursued by the Eumenides, eager to
reach a quiet spot where he might end his
blighted existence.
The snow fell in large flakes that cold
January night; and as each flake sank gently
on the quiet bosom of the river, and silently
disappeared in it, leaving no other trace than
the smallest possible circle, it seemed to him
an image of his own disappearance from this
stormy, sunless world. In the deep, quiet
bosom of Eternity was he about to vanish:
from this scene of turmoil and disgrace, he
was to drop into the swiftly flowing river
of Eternity, in it to be absorbed like to those
flakes of snow. There was comfort in that
thought.
He walked on, thinking of what his wife
and child would do when left by him. He
thought sadly of Blanche's misery; for he
knew the depth of her affection for him—for
him who had so ill repaid it, who had
brought such shame and sorrow on her head;
but he endeavoured to console himself with
the reflection that her father would take care
of her, and that, perhaps, the best thing that
could occur to her was to become a widow.
In those lucid moments which precede the
last solemn act, he reviewed his conduct with
melancholy clearness; and, undimmed by
sophisms, his conduct appeared to him in its
true light.
He grew calmer as he walked. He thought
of his child with something like satisfaction,
when he reflected that she was too young to
know anything of her father's disgrace; and
that, before she grew old enough even to
prattle about him, all would be forgotten.
Then he thought of Hester, in her miserable
finery, and followed her in imagination through
the rapid stages of her inevitable career.
And he thought of Frank, then so prosperous,
but soon, as he foresaw, to be dragged down
from his prosperity to the destitution which
must quickly follow; and he saw him dying in
an hospital.
And the thought of death was sweeter to
him, as he walked musingly on.
A light was dimly shining in Blanche's bedroom,
and she was seated by the window looking
out into the night, awaiting the return of
him who was to return no more. Her child
was sleeping calmly; no hint of the anguish
which ploughed the hearts of its parents
troubled its quiet breathing.
The clock struck twelve.
A heavy sigh issued from the watcher as the
strokes fell upon her ear, and she rose to snuff
the enormous wick of the neglected candle.
She then resumed her seat at the window.
"When will he come?" she asked herself, sadly.
She feared to meet him—feared to look upon
his face, after what had passed; feared lest he,
upon whose brow she had been wont to see the
imperial stamp of genius—in whose eye the
lustre of a glorious mind, on whose lips the
smile of unutterable tenderness,—there should
now be legible the stamp of infamy, the dull
look of shame, the cynical sneer of recklessness.
She feared to meet him, yet she could not
repress her impatience to see him: a vague
dread that he might not return, shifted to and
fro before her mind, and kept her anxiously
watching.
The clock struck one.
Her candle was guttering in the socket, and
she lighted another. She bent over the cradle
of her sleeping infant with a searching look of
love; and seeing that it slept peacefully, she
again resumed her seat at the window.
The snow had ceased to fall. The bright
stars were lustrous in the deep, dark, moonless
heavens, in which they seemed suspended.
The ground was white with the untrodden
snow, as also were the tops of the houses, and
the branches of the trees. Not a breath of
wind stirred. All was silent without, hushed
in the repose of night. Not a footstep was
heard; not even the distant barking of some
watchful dog.
Cold, cheerless, desolate as a leafless tree,
was the night out into which the watcher
looked, awaiting her husband's return; but he
came not, would not come!
The clock struck two.
The watcher stirred the fire, and drew the
shawl closer around her. She was cold; but
it was not the cold of that winter night which
numbed her limbs, it was the cold icy fear
which momently assumed a more definite and
consistent shape.
She no longer asked: "when will he come?"
Her teeth chattered as the thought that he
would never come, grew more and more like a
certainty.
There was a shroud upon the earth: a pure,
white, stainless shroud, prepared for one who
was yet young, but who had lived too long.
To her widowed eyes this garment of snow,
which nature wore, became a terrible symbol,
and the stars seemed to look down upon her in
infinite compassion.
He came not; could not come. The silent
river had opened to receive him, and was now
flowing swiftly and silently over his lifeless
corpse.
The clock struck three.
A cry of agony broke from the watcher as
those three small strokes with horrible distinctness
fell upon her ear and seemed to utter,—
"He is dead!"
But she remained at her window looking; out
into the night. For two hours longer did she
sit there, and then dropped into a feverish sleep,
visited by happy, though broken, dreams.
She dreamed that she had dreamed her
husband had committed a forgery, and that
she awoke to find it but a dream: how great
her joy, as she clasped him by the hand and
told him all! and how his tender eyes bent
down upon her as he said,—
"What! think that of me!"
And she awoke—awoke to find herself seated
at the window—the dull winter morning struggling
into obscure day—the snow heaped up on
the window ledge, and covering everything
without—and the crushing reality was once more
threatening her!
Set down, set down that sorrow, 't is all mine.
DECKAR.
Her candle was burnt out; the fire had only a
few live embers which went out directly she
attempted to revive it. She was numbed with
cold; weary with grief; and threw herself upon
the bed.
Sleep was impossible. A settled, though
vague, conviction that Cecil would not return
had taken possession of her mind. She fancied
that he must have lost the money, and was now
lying concealed for fear of the consequences of
his crime.
As the morning fairly broke, she put on her
things, and hurried to Captain Heath to ask
his assistance and advice. He was at breakfast
when she arrived, and her appearance so wan,
and yet so strangely supernaturally calm, made
him fear the worst.
"Cecil has not returned," she said quietly.
"What is to be done?"
The captain at once guessed the truth, and
was silent.
"He is ashamed to return," she said. "How
are we to learn where he is?"
He remained silent.
"If we were to advertise in the papers," she
suggested, "could we not by that means let
him know that his ... imprudence ... has been
overlooked?"
"Yes, yes. That is the only plan."
"Will you do it?"
"At once; but go you home, he may return
every minute."
"You think, then, he will return?" she asked
with more emotion in her voice than she had
hitherto betrayed.
He trembled slightly as he answered,—
"At any rate ... you had better be there."
She pressed his hand mournfully, and
withdrew, leaving Heath amazed and alarmed at
the quietude of her manner.
On reaching Hammersmith she saw at some
distance before her, a large crowd of people
hurrying along. She quietly wondered what it
could be; perhaps a fire; perhaps a man led
to the station house; perhaps a show which
the crowd followed wondering.
She walked on, till she saw the crowd stop at
her own house, and then she flew, urged on by
some quick sudden fear—she pierced the
crowd—she entered the house—in the passage were
four men bearing a corpse on a shutter: her
heart told her whose corpse it was before her
eyes had recognised it.
She saw no more.
When next she became conscious, she found
herself in her old bedroom at her father's, her
sister Violet seated by her bedside, gazing
inquiringly upon her. The fever was subsiding,
and her life was saved.
"Mrs. Dombey, it is very necessary that there should be
some understanding arrived at between us. Your conduct does
not please me, madam .... I have made you my wife. You
bear my name. You are associated with my position and my
reputation."
CHARLES DICKENS.
On the day on which Cecil had forged the
cheque, Meredith Vyner entered his wife's
boudoir with the intention of coming to a
serious explanation with her.
Several times, lately, had the word "separation"
been pronounced between them, without,
however, her attaching much importance to it.
She knew that he was miserable, she knew that
his love for her had been worn away, but she
knew also that he was weak, and thought he
would never have courage enough to proceed to
extremities.
In this she made a great mistake. Vyner
was weak, it is true, but he was also obstinate;
he was easily cajoled, but not easily driven
from any plan he had once resolved on. Unable
to resist the wildest caprices of his wife,
while he loved her, she lost all power over him
in losing his affection. This she did not suspect.
Like many other people, she altogether miscalculated
the nature of her power over him, and
imagined that what she really gained by
cajolery and pretended affection, she gained by
mere cunning and strength of will.
Their relative positions were altogether
changed. Vyner, no longer the doating
husband, was now the obstinate man. He saw
that it was impossible to live happily with her,
and saw that if his children were once more
around him—if Violet especially were once more
at home—he could again resume his peaceful
routine of existence.
"I am come to speak seriously to you," he
said, as seating himself opposite to her, he drew
out his deliberative snuff-box.
"And I am in no humour for it," she replied,
"my head aches. My nerves are irritable this
morning."
"What I have to say must be said, and the
sooner it is said the better for both of us."
She was surprised at the firmness of his manner.
"It is on the old subject," he added; "I need
not again recapitulate the many strong objections
your conduct this last year has given rise
to, but I wish once for all to understand whether
you intend persisting in it, or whether you
will pay a little more attention to what is due
both to me and yourself."
"How tiresome you are on that subject!
When will you understand that a young woman
cannot have an old head upon her shoulders,
unless it is also an ugly one? I shall be grave
and sedate enough in time, I dare say; meanwhile,
allow me to observe, that, although I may
be fond of admiration, yet I know perfectly well
what is due to myself."
"If you know it, you do not demean yourself
in consequence."
"That is the question. I maintain that I
do; and I suppose I am old enough to know
what is right on such matters."
He shook his head.
"Can you name any one instance in which
I have overstepped the limits to which even
English rigidity confines a young woman?"
"Your encouragement of the attentions of
Mr. Ashley...."
"Again, Mr. Ashley!"
"Of Mr. Maxwell...."
She burst out laughing; but the laugh was
hollow.
"Of Lord * * * * who every day...."
"Why he's as old as you are!"
Vyner winced at the epigram, which indeed
was cruel and insulting.
"It is a pity you did not think of the great
disparity in our ages before you married me,
Mrs. Vyner."
"A great pity."
"I have often thought so of late."
"How much better had you thought so before
you made me an offer!"
"It was the greatest mistake I ever made,
but—
'Sic visum Veneri, cui placeat impares
Formas atque animos sub juga aënea
Sævo mittere cum joco!'"
Vyner had often made that quotation to himself,
and now launched it with great satisfaction,
as was evident by the noisy pinch of snuff
with which he closed it.
Mrs. Vyner shrugged her shoulders.
"You have spoken," he said, "of
incompatibilities, and I fear they exist. But,
Mrs. Vyner, if you have destroyed my domestic
happiness, you shall not destroy my future
comfort. I will not be made a laughing-stock
abroad, and be made miserable at home. I say
I will not. I am come, therefore, to offer you
an alternative."
"Let me hear it."
"You must cease to see Mr. Maxwell and
Lord * * * *"
"Impossible!"
"I say you must. Moreover, you must
change your manner entirely, both to other men
and to your husband."
"What manner am I to adopt?"
"That which befits a well-conducted wife."
"Mr. Vyner, you are insulting."
"In demanding you to do your duty?"
"No; in asserting that I do anything derogatory."
"You have strange ideas, Mrs. Vyner, on
that point."
"Perhaps so; but they are mine."
"They are not mine, however."
"That is unfortunate!"
"Very. I am demanding nothing extraordinary,
I imagine, in insisting that you should
cease to flirt with others, and should pay more
respect and deference to my wishes than you
have done of late. I do not demand affection..."
She again shrugged her shoulders; he perceived it.
"Because," he continued, "I know that is
absurd; whatever regard you may once have had
for me is gone. I do not even demand
gratitude for the kindness I have ever shown
you—and you must admit that I have been an
indulgent husband—foolishly so. But I have a
right to demand from a wife a fulfilment at
least of the most ordinary duties of a wife, and
a certain amount of respect, or the show of it at
any rate. This I have a right to demand, and
this I will have."
Mrs. Vyner was not a woman to brook such
a dictatorial tone even from the man she loved;
and we have seen how Maxwell, when he
adopted it, only irritated her to an unusual
degree; from Vyner, whom she had been
accustomed to sway as she pleased; from Vyner
whom she disliked, and somewhat despised, this
tone was, therefore, excessively offensive.
Her lip quivered as she replied, "This is a
subject upon which we can never agree. I hold
myself to be quite competent to judge of my
own actions, and until I have done anything to
forfeit the good opinion of the world, I shall
continue to act as I think proper."
"That is your final determination?"
"It is. I hope it will be unnecessary for me
to repeat it."
"In coming here I expected this, so I came
prepared."
"Let me hear your alternative."
"A separation."
She started; not at the word—that she had
heard before—but at the quiet, dogged resolution
of the tone. A flush of angry pride ran over
her cheeks and brow.
"It is very terrible, your alternative!" she
said, ironically.
"Are you prepared to accept it?"
"Perfectly."
"Very well, then, in that case, I have
only to see about the settlements, and in a
week or two, at the farthest, the affair can be
arranged."
He put back his snuff-box into his huge
pocket, as he said this, and walked out of the
room with a calmness that lent dignity to his
lumpish figure.
She drooped her head upon her hand, and
reflected. Revolted pride, anger, and fear were
struggling in her breast. Irritated as she was
by her husband's manner, she could not reflect
upon the separation without uneasiness.
As his wife, she had an enviable position;
separated from him, she not only lost the
advantages of that position, in a deprivation of
wealth, but also in a deprivation of the
consideration with which the world regarded her.
A woman separated from her husband is always
equivocally placed; even when the husband is
notorious as a bad character, as a man of
unendurable temper, or bitten with some
disgraceful vice, society always looks obliquely at
the woman separated from him; and when she
has no such glaring excuse, her position is
more than equivocal. "Respectable" women
will not receive her; or do so with a certain
nuance of reluctance. Men gossip about her,
and regard her as a fair mark for their
gallantries.
Mrs. Vyner knew all this thoroughly; she
had refused to know women in that condition;
at Mrs. Langley Turner's, where she had more
than once encountered these black sheep, she
had turned aside her head, and by a thousand
little impertinent airs made them feel the
difference between her purity and their disgrace. A
separation, therefore, was not a thing to be
lightly thought of; yet the idea of obeying
Vyner, of accepting his conditions, made her
cheek burn with indignation.
Absorbed in thought she sat, weighing, as in
a delicate balance, the conflicting considerations
which arose within her, and ever and anon
asking herself,—"What has become of Maxwell?"
Maxwell had just recovered from the effect of
that broken bloodvessel which terminated the
paroxysm of passion Mrs. Vyner's language and
conduct had thrown him into.
At the very moment when she was asking
herself, "What has become of Maxwell?" he
concluded his will, arranged all his papers,
burnt many letters, and, going to a drawer,
took from them a pair of pocket pistols with
double barrels.
He was very pale, and his veins seemed
injected with bile in lieu of blood; but he was
excessively calm.
In one so violent, in one whose anger was
something more like madness than any normal
condition of the human mind, who from
childhood upwards had been unrestrained in the
indulgence of his passion, this calmness was
appalling.
He loaded the four barrels with extreme precision,
having previously cleared the touchholes,
and not only affixed the caps with care, but
also took the precaution of putting some
extra caps in his waistcoat pocket in case of
accidents.
His hand did not tremble once; on his brow
there was no scowl; on his colourless lips no
grim smile; but calm, as if he were about the
most indifferent act of his life, and breathing
regularly as if no unusual thought was in his
mind, he finished the priming of those deadly
instruments, and placed them in his pocket.
Once more did he read over his will; and then
having set everything in order, rang the bell.
"Fetch a cab," he said quietly to the servant
who entered.
"Are you going out, sir?" asked the astonished
servant.
"Don't you see I am?"
"Yes, sir,—only you are but just out of
bed...."
"I am quite well enough."
There was no reply possible. The cab was
brought. He stepped into it, and drove to
Mrs. Vyner's.
Although she was thinking of him at the
very moment when he was announced, she
started at the sound of his name. His
appearance startled her still more. She saw that
he could only just have risen from a bed of
sickness, and that sickness she knew had been
caused by the vehemence of his love for her.
Affectionate as was her greeting, it brought
no smile upon his lips, no light into his glazed
eyes.
"The hypocrite!" was his mental exclamation.
"Oh! Maxwell, how I have longed to see
you," she said "you left me in anger, and
I confess I did not behave well to you; but
why have you not been here before? did you
not know that I was but too anxious to make it
up with you?"
"How should I know that?" he quietly asked.
"How! did you not know my love for you?"
"I did not," he said, perfectly unmoved.
"You did not? Oh you ungrateful creature!
Is that the return I am to meet with?
Is it to say such things that you are here?"
A slight smile played in his eyes for a
moment, but his lips were motionless.
"Come," she said, "you have been angry
with me—I have been wrong—let us forget
and forgive."
He did not touch her proffered hand, but
said,—
"If for once in your life you can be frank, be
so now."
"I will. What am I to say?"
Carelessly putting both hands into his coat
pockets, and grasping the pistols, he rose,
stretched out his coat tails, and stood before
her in an attitude usual with him, and
characteristic of Englishmen generally, when
standing with their backs to the fire.
"You promise to be frank?" he said.
"I do."
"Then tell me whether Lord * * * * * was
here yesterday."
"He was."
"Will he be here to-morrow?"
"Most likely."
"Then you have not given him his congé?"
"Not I."
Maxwell paused and looked at her keenly,
his right hand grasping firmly the pistol in his
pocket.
"Then may I ask the reason of your very
civil reception of me to-day?"
"The reason! Civil!"
"Yes, the reason, the motive: you must have one."
"Is not my love...."
"You promised to be frank," he said,
menacingly.
"I did—I am so."
"Then let us have no subterfuge of language—speak
plainly—it will be better for you."
"Maxwell, if you are come here to irritate
me with your jealousy, and your absurd doubts,
you have chosen a bad time. I am not well.
I am not happy. I do not wish to quarrel with
you—do not force me to it."
"Beware!" he said, in deep solemn tones.
"Beware you! George, do not provoke me—pray
do not. Sit down and talk reasonably.
What is it you want to ask me?"
"I repeat: the motive for your civility to me?"
"And I repeat: my love."
"Your love!"
"There again! Why will you torment me
with this absurd doubt? Why should you
doubt me? Have I any interest in deceiving
you? You are not my husband.—It is very
strange that when I do not scruple to avow my
love, you should scruple to believe me."
"My scruples arise from my knowledge of
you: you are a coquette."
"I know it; but not to you."
"Solemnly—do you love me?"
"Solemnly—I do!"
He paused again, as unprepared for this
dissimulation. She withstood his gaze without
flinching.
An idea suddenly occurred to him.
"Mary, after what I have seen, doubts are
justifiable. Are you prepared to give me a
proof?"
"Yes, any; name it."
"Will you go with me to France?"
"Run away with you?"
"You refuse!" he said, half drawing a pistol
from his pocket.
She was bewildered. The suddenness of the
proposition, and its tremendous importance
staggered her.
A deep gloom concentrated on his face; the
crisis had arrived, and he only awaited a word
from her to blow her brains out.
With the indescribable rapidity of thought,
her mind embraced the whole consequences of
his offer—weighed the chances—exposed the
peril of her situation with her husband, and
permitted her to calculate whether, since
separation seemed inevitable, there would not be
an advantage in accepting Maxwell's offer.
"He loves me," she said; "loves me as no
one ever loved before. With him I shall be
happy."
"I await your decision," he said.
"George, I am yours!"
She flung herself upon his neck. He was
so astonished at her resolution, that at first he
could not believe it, and his hands still
grasped the pistols; but by degrees her embrace
convinced him, and clasping her in his arms,
he exclaimed,—
"Your love has saved you! You shall be
a happy woman—I will be your slave!"
The discovery of Mrs. Vyner's flight was
nearly coincident with the announcement of
Cecil's suicide. Poor Vyner was like a
madman. He reproached himself for having spoken
so harshly to his wife, for having driven her
to this desperate act, and thus causing her
ruin. Had he been more patient, more
tolerant! She was so young, so giddy, so
impulsive, he ought to have had more
consideration for her!
It was quite clear to Vyner's mind that he
had behaved very brutally, and that his wife
was an injured innocent.
In the midst of this grief, there came the
horrible intelligence of Cecil's end. There
again Vyner reproached himself. Why did
he allow Blanche to marry that unhappy
young man? On second thoughts, "he had
never allowed it"; but yet it was he who
encouraged Cecil—who invited him to his
seat—who pressed him to stay!
In vain did Captain Heath remonstrate with
him on this point; Vyner was at that moment
in a remorseful, self-reproachful spirit, which
no arguments could alter. He left everything
to Captain Heath's management, with the
helplessness of weak men, and sat desolate
in his study, wringing his hands, taking ounces
of snuff, and overwhelming himself with
unnecessary reproaches.
Blanche, in a brain fever, was removed to
her father's, where she was watched by the
miserable old man, as if he had been the cause
of her sorrow. Violet was sent for from her
uncle's, and established herself once more in
the house. Now her step-mother was gone, she
could devote herself to her father.
Blanche's return to consciousness was
unhappily also a return to that fierce sorrow
which nothing but time could assuage. She
was only induced to live by the reflection that
her child needed her care. But what a prospect
was it for her! How could she ever smile
again! How could she ever cease to weep for
her kind, affectionate, erring, but beloved Cecil!
It is the intensity of all passion which makes
us think it must be eternal; and it is this very
intensity which makes it so short-lived. In a
few months Blanche occasionally smiled; her
grief began to take less the shape of a thing
present, and more that of a thing past; it was
less of a sensation, and more of a reverie.
At first the image of her husband was a
ghastly image of dishonour and early wreck;
his face wore the stern keen look of suspicion
which had agitated her when last she saw him
alive; or else it wore the placidity of the corpse
which she had last beheld. Behind that ghastly
image stood the background of their happy
early days of marriage, so shortlived, yet so
exquisite!
In time the ghastliness faded away, and
round the image of her husband, there was
a sort of halo—the background gradually
invaded the foreground, till at last the picture
had no more melancholy in it than there is in
some sweet sunset over a quiet sea. The tears
she shed were no longer bitter: they were the
sweet and pensive tears shed by that melancholy
which finds pleasure in its own indulgence.
Grief had lost its pang. Her mind, familiarized
with her loss, no longer dwelt upon
the painful, but on the beautiful side of the
past. Her child was there to keep alive the
affectionate remembrance of its father, without
suggesting the idea of the moody, irritable,
ungenerous husband, which Cecil had at the
last become.
Like a child crying itself to sleep—passing
from sorrow into quiet breathing—her grief had
passed into pensiveness. Cecil's image was as
a star smiling down upon her from heaven:
round it were clustered quiet, happy thoughts,
not the less happy because shadowed with a
seriousness which had been grief.
Vyner soon recovered from the double shock
he had sustained, and was now quite happy
again with his two girls, and his excellent
friend Heath, as his constant companions;
while Julius and Rose were seldom two days
absent from them.
For the sake of Blanche they now returned
to Wytton Hall, and there her health was slowly
but steadily restored.
Captain Heath was her companion in almost
every walk and drive; reading to her the books
she wished; daily becoming a greater favourite
with little Rose Blanche, who would leave even
her nurse to come to him; and daily feeling
serener, as his love grew not deeper, but less
unquiet: less, as he imagined, like a lover's love,
and more like that of an elder brother.
Blanche was happier with him than with any
one else; not that she loved him, not even that
she divined his love; since Cecil's death, his
manner had been even less demonstrative than
it had ever been before, and it would have been
impossible for the keenest observer to have
imagined there was anything like love in his
attentions.
What quiet blissful months those were which
they then passed: Vyner once more absorbed
in his Horace; Blanche daily growing stronger,
and less melancholy; Heath living as one in a
dream; Violet hearing, with a woman's pride
in him she loves, of Marmaduke's immense
success in parliament, where he was already
looked up to as the future Chatham or Burke.
Every time Violet saw Marmaduke's name in
the papers, her heart fluttered against the bars
of its prison, and she groaned at the idea of
being separated from him. Indeed her letters
to Rose were so full of Marmaduke, that Rose
planned with Julius a little scheme to bring the
two unexpectedly together, as soon as Violet
returned to town.
"I am sure Violet loves him," said Rose;
"I don't at all understand what has occurred
to separate them. Violet is silent on the point,
and is uneasy if I allude to it. But don't
you agree with me, Julius, that she must love
him?"
"I think it very probable."
"Probable! Why not certain?"
"Because, you know, I am apt to be
suspicious on that subject."
"I know you are," she said, laughing and
shaking her locks at him, "and a pretty judge
you are of a woman's heart!"
Julius allowed himself to be persuaded that
Violet really did love Marmaduke, and
accordingly some weeks afterwards, when the Vyners
had returned, Julius arranged a pic-nic in which
Marmaduke was to join, without Violet's
knowledge. Fearful lest she should refuse to
accompany them if she saw him before starting, it was
agreed that Marmaduke should meet them at
Richmond.
Imagine with what feverish impatience he
awaited them, and with what a sinking,
anxious heart he appeared amongst them.
Violet blushed, and looked at Rose; the
laughter in her eyes plainly betrayed her share
in the plot, in defiance of the affected gravity
of her face. He shook hands with such of the
company as he knew personally, was introduced
to the others, and then quietly seated
himself beside Violet, in a manner so free from
either embarrassment or gallantry, that it put
her quite at her ease. She had determined,
from the first, to frustrate Rose's
kindly-intentioned scheme; and she felt that she had
strength enough to do so. But his manner
at once convinced her that, however he might
have been brought there, it was with no intention
of taking any advantage of their meeting
to open forbidden subjects.
Marmaduke was in high spirits, and talked
quite brilliantly. Violet was silent; but from
time to time, as he turned to address a remark
to her, he saw her look of admiration, and that
inspired him.
I need not describe the pic-nic, for time
presses, and pic-nics are all very much alike.
Enough if we know that the day was spent
merrily and noisily, and that dinner was noisier
and merrier than all: the champagne drank,
amounting to something incredible.
Evening was drawing in. The last rays of
a magnificent sunset were fading in the western
sky, and the cool breeze springing up warned
the company that it was time to prepare for
their return.
The boisterous gaiety of the afternoon and
dinner had ceased. Every one knows the effect
of an exhilarating feast, followed by a listless
exhausted hour or two; when the excitement
produced by wine and laughter has passed
away, a lassitude succeeds, which in poetical
minds induces a tender melancholy, in prosaic
minds a desire for stimulus or sleep.
As the day went down, all the guests were
exhausted, except Marmaduke and Violet, who,
while the others were gradually becoming
duller and duller, had insensibly wandered
away, engrossed in the most enchanting
conversation.
"Did I not tell you?" whispered Rose, as
she pointed out to Julius the retreating figures
of her sister and Marmaduke.
Away the lovers wandered, and although
their hearts were full of love, although their
eyes were speaking it as eloquently as love
can speak, not a syllable crossed their lips
which could be referred to it. A vague
yearning—a dim, melancholy, o'ermastering feeling
held its empire over their souls. The witching
twilight, closing in so strange a day, seemed
irresistibly to guide their thoughts into that one
channel which they had hitherto so dexterously
avoided. Her hand was on his arm—he pressed
it tenderly, yet gently—so gently!—to his side.
He gazed into her large lustrous eyes, and
intoxicated by their beauty and tenderness, he
began to speak.
"It is getting late. We must return. We
must separate. Oh! Violet, before we separate,
tell me that it is not for ever——"
"Marmaduke!" she stammered out, alarmed.
"Dearest, dearest Violet, we shall meet
again—you will let me see you—will you not?"
She was silent, struggling.
They walked on a few paces; then he again
said,—
"You will not banish me entirely—you will
from time to time——"
"No, Marmaduke," she said, solemnly; "no,
it will not be right. You need not look so
pained—I—have I nothing to overcome when
I forego the delight of seeing you? But it
must not be. You know that it cannot be."
"I know nothing of the kind!" he impetuously
exclaimed; "I only know that you do
not love me!"
She looked reproachfully at him; but his
head was turned away.
"Cold, cold as marble," he muttered as they
walked on.
She did not answer him. Lovers are always
unreasonable and unjust. He was furious at
her "coldness;" she was hurt at his misunderstanding
her. She could have implored him to
be more generous; but he gave her no
encouragement—he spoke no word—kept his look
averted. Thus neither tried to explain away
the other's misconception; neither smoothed
the other's ruffled anger. In silence they walked
on, environed by their pride. The longer they
kept silent, the bitterer grew their feelings;—the
more he internally reprobated her for coldness,
the more she was hurt at his refusal to acknowledge
the justness of her resolution, after all that
had passed between them by letter.
In this painful state of feeling, they joined
their companions just as the boats were got
ready.
Rose looked inquiringly at Violet; but Violet
averted her head. Julius was troubled to
perceive the evident anger of Marmaduke.
The boats pushed off. The evening was
exquisite, and Rose murmured to Julius the
words of their favourite Leopardi:—
Dolce e chiara è la notte, e senza vento,
E queta sovra i tetti e in mezzo agli orti
Posa la luna, e di lontan rivela
Serena ogni montagna.
Wearied by the excitement of the day, they
were almost all plunged in reveries from which
they made no effort to escape. The regular
dip of the oars in the water, and the falling drops
shaken from them, had a musical cadence, which
fell deliciously on the ear. It was a dreamy
scene. The moon rose, and shed her gentle
light upon them, as they moved along, in almost
unbroken silence, upon the silver stream. The
last twitter of the birds had ceased; the
regular and soothing sounds of the oars alone kept
them in a sort of half consciousness of being
awake.
Marmaduke and Violet were suffering tortures.
She occasionally stole a glance at him,
and with redoubled pain read upon his haughty
face the expression of anger and doubt which
so much distressed her. The large tears rolled
over her face. She leaned over the boat side to
hide them, and as she saw the river hurrying on
beneath her, she thought of the unhappy Cecil,
and of his untimely end. Over his dishonoured
corpse had this cold river flowed, as gently as
now it flowed beneath her... From Cecil her
thoughts wandered to Wytton Hall, and her early
inclination for him—to her scene in the field
with the bull—to her first meeting with
Marmaduke; and then she thought no more of
Cecil.
Thus they were rowed through the silent
evening. On reaching town, the party dispersed.
Marmaduke and Violet separated with cold
politeness, and each went home to spend a
miserable night.
For some days did Marmaduke brood over
her refusal, and as he reflected on the strength
of her character, and the slight probability that
she would ever yield—her very frankness told
him that—he took a sudden and very loverlike
resolution that he would quit England, and
return to Brazil.
Preparations for his departure were not delayed
an instant, and with his usual impetuosity
he had completed every arrangement before
another would have fairly commenced.
Leave-taking began. He wrote to Vyner
announcing his intention, and saying that he
proposed doing himself the pleasure of bidding
them adieu. He had the faint hope, which
was very faint, that Violet might be present,
and that he might see her for the last time.
Lovers attach a very particular importance to a
last farewell, and angry as Marmaduke was
with Violet, the idea of quitting England for
ever, without once more seeing her, was
extremely painful to him.
It was a dull, drizzly day, enough to depress
the most elastic of temperaments. Violet was
in her father's study, looking out upon the mist
of rain and cloud, debating with herself whether
she should be present during Marmaduke's visit
or not. After what had passed, she tried to
persuade herself that it was fortunate he was
going to quit England, fearing that her resolution
would never hold out against his renewed
entreaties; but it was in vain she sophisticated
with herself, her heart told her that she was
wretched, intensely wretched at his departure.
Her father's voice roused her from this reverie,
and she passed into the drawing-room, where a
few minutes afterwards the servant entered, and
announced "Mr. Ashley."
A stream of fire seemed suddenly to pour
along her veins; but by the time he had shaken
hands with Vyner and Blanche, and had turned
to her, she was comparatively calm. His face
was very sallow, and there was a nervous quivering
of his delicate nostrils, which indicated the
emotion within, but which was unobserved by
her, as her eyes were averted.
The conversation was uneasy and common-place.
Marmaduke's manner was calm and
composed, but his voice was low. Violet sat
with her eyes upon the carpet, deadly pale,
and with colourless lips. Blanche, who did not
quite understand the relation between them, but
who knew that Violet loved him, was anxious
on her account. Vyner alone was glib and
easy. He talked of parliament, and remarked,
that the best thing he knew of it was, that the
members always quoted Horace.
As the interview proceeded, Marmaduke's
grave, cold manner became slightly tinged
with irony and bitterness; and when Vyner
said to him, "Apropos, what—if the question
be permissible—what induces you to leave
us? are you to be away long?"
He replied, with a marked emphasis, "Very long."
"Is Brazil, then, so very attractive?"
"England ceases to be attractive. I want
breathing space. There I can, as Tennyson
sings,—
'Burst all the links of habit—there to wander far away,
On from island unto island, at the gateways of the day.'"
Blanche, mildly interposing, said,—
"But what does he also sing, and in the
same poem?
'Better fifty years of Europe than a cycle of Cathay.'"
Violet's eyes were fixed upon the ground.
"And, after all—poetry aside—what are you
going to do with yourself in that hot climate?"
"To marry, perhaps," he said, carelessly,
and with a forced laugh.
Violet shook all over; but she did not raise
her eyes.
"An heiress?" asked Vyner.
"No,—to continue Tennyson,—
'I will take some savage woman, she shall rear my dusky race.'"
There was singular bitterness, as he added,—
"In those climates, the passions are not
cramped by the swaddling clothes of civilisation;
their franker natures better suit my own
impulsiveness; when they love they love—they
do not stultify their hearts with intricate
sophisms."
Violet now raised her large eyes, and, with
mournful steadiness, reproached him by a look,
for the words he had just uttered. He met
her look with one as steady, but flashing with
scorn.
"Well, for my part," said Vyner, tapping
his snuff-box, "Brazil would have little attraction
for me, especially if the women are violent.
I can't bear violent women."
Marmaduke had expected some remark from
Violet in answer to his speech; but that one
look was her only answer, and she was now as
intently examining the carpet as before. He
noticed her paleness, and the concentrated
calmness of her manner, and it irritated him
the more.
Blanche, with true feminine sagacity, saw
it was desirable, in every case, that Violet
should have an opportunity of speaking with
him alone, so walked out of the room, and in
a few minutes sent the servant with a message
to Vyner that he was wanted for an instant
down stairs.
The lovers were now alone, and horribly
embarrassed. They wanted to break the
uneasy silence, but neither of them could
utter a word.
At last Violet, feeling that it was imperative
on her to say something, murmured, without
looking at him,—
"And when do you start?"
"On Monday."
Another pause ensued; perhaps worse this
time than before, because of the unsuccessful
attempt.
"I wonder whether it still rains?" he said,
after a few moments' silence, and walked to the
window to look out.
Left thus sitting by herself—an emblem of
the far more terrible desertion which was to
follow—Violet looked in upon her desolate
heart, and felt appalled at the prospect. The
imperious cry of passion sounded within her,
and would not be gagged: the pent-up tide
burst away the barriers, and rushed precipitately
onwards, carrying before it all scruples like
straws upon a stream.
"Marmaduke!" she exclaimed.
He turned from the window; she had half-risen
from her seat; he walked up to her.
She flung herself into his arms.
"Is this true, Violet? Speak—are you
mine—mine?"
She pressed him closer to her. It is only
men who find words in such moments; and
Marmaduke was as eloquent as love and
rapture could make him.
When she did speak, it was in a low fluttering
tone, her pale face suffused with blushes, as
she told him, that to live apart from him was
impossible;—either he must stay, or take her
with him.
Meanwhile, Vyner had been prettily rated by
Blanche for his dulness in not perceiving that
the lovers wanted to be alone.
"But are you certain, Blanche, that they are
lovers? For my part, I wish it were so; but
although Violet certainly has a regard for him,
I have reason to believe, that he has none for
her."
Blanche sighed and said,—
"Then let us go back, for in that case, they
will only be uncomfortable together."
* * * * * *
N.B.—The journey to Brazil was
indefinitely postponed.
1845.
"Je l'aurais supprimée si j'écrivais un roman; je sais que
l'héroine ne doit avoir qu'un goùt; qu'il doit être pour
quelqu'un de parfait et ne jamais finir; mais le vrai est
comme il peut, et n'a de mérite que d'être ce qu'il est."
MADAME DE STAAL DE LAUNAY.
The moon was serenely shining one soft July
night, exactly ten years from the date of the
prologue to this long drama, when a young
woman crept stealthily from the door of an old
and picturesque-looking house, at the extremity
of the town of Angoulême, and with many
agitated glances thrown back, as one who feared
pursuit, ran, rather than walked, on to the high
road.
The moonbeams falling on that pale, wan,
terror-stricken face, revealed the scarcely
recognisable features of the gay, daring,
fascinating girl, whom ten years before we saw upon
the sands, behind Mrs. Henley's house, parting,
in such hysterical grief, from the lover whom
she then thought never could be absent from
her heart, and whom a few months afterwards
she jilted for twelve thousand a year. Yes,
that pale, wan woman was Mrs. Meredith
Vyner; and she fled from the man for whom she
had sacrificed her name!
Her face was a pathetic commentary upon
her life. No longer were those tiger eyes
lighted up with the fire of daring triumph, no
longer were those thin lips curled with a
smiling cruel coquetry, no longer drooped those
golden ringlets with a fairy grace. The eyes
were dull with grief; the lips were drawn down
with constant fretfulness; the whole face
sharpened with constant fear and eagerness. Her
beauty had vanished—her health was broken—her
gaiety was gone. Crushed in spirit, she
was a houseless fugitive, escaping from the
most hateful of tyrants.
Retribution, swift and terrible, had fallen
upon her head. From the moment when, in
obedience to that wild impulse, she had fled
from her husband with her saturnine lover, her
life had been one protracted torture. Better,
oh! better far, would it have been for her to
have refused him, and to have died by his
hand, than to have followed him to such misery
as she had endured!
It would take me long to recount in detail
the sad experience of the last two years. She
found herself linked to a man, whose diabolical
temper made her shudder when he frowned,
and whose mad, unreasonable, minute jealousy
kept her in constant terror. She dared not look
at another man. She was never allowed to quit
his sight for an instant. If she sighed, it made
him angry; if she wept, it drew down
reproaches upon her, and insinuations that she
repented of the step she had taken, and wished
to leave him. A day's peace or happiness with
such a man was impossible. He had none of
the amiable qualities which might have made
her forget her guilty position. Dark, passionate,
suspicious, ungenerous, and exacting, he was
always brooding over the difference between the
claims he made upon her admiration and love,
and the mode in which she responded to those
claims. His tyrannous vanity, could only have
been propitiated by the most abject and exorbitant
adulation—adulation in word, look, and act.
She had sacrificed herself, but that was only
one act, and he demanded a continued sacrifice.
No woman had ever loved him before, yet
nothing less than idolatry, or the simulation of
it, would content him. He could not understand
how she should have any other thought
than that of ministering to his exacting vanity.
Now, of all women, Mrs. Vyner was the last
to be capable of such a passion; and certainly,
under such circumstances, no woman could have
given way to the passion, had she felt it. In
constant terror and perpetual remorse, what
time had she for the subtleties of love? She
dreaded and despised him. She saw that her
fate was inextricably inwoven with his; and—what
a humiliation!—she saw that he did not
love her!
No, Maxwell did not love her. She had not
been with him a month before he became
aware of the fact himself. It is a remark I
have often made, that men thwarted in their
desires confound their own wilfulness with
depth of passion. With fierce energy, they will
move heaven and earth to gain what, when
gained, they disregard. This is usually considered
as a proof of the strength of their love;
it only shows the strength of their self-love.
It was Maxwell's irritated vanity which
made him so persisting in his pursuit of
Mrs. Vyner. It was his wounded vanity which
made him capable of murdering her; not his
love: for love, even when wounded, is still a
generous feeling;—it is sympathy, and admits
no hate.
What, then, was Maxwell's object in living
with Mrs. Vyner after the discovery that he
did not really love her? Why did he not quit
her, or at least allow her to quit him?
His vanity! precisely that: the same
exacting vanity which prompted all his former
actions, prompted this. He felt that she did
not idolize him; he knew she would be glad
to quit him;—and there was torture in the
thought. Had she really loved him with
passionate self-oblivion, he would have deserted
her. As it was, the same motive which had
roused his desire for her possession, which had
made him force her to sacrifice everything for
his sake, was as active now as then. If she
left him, he was still, except for the one act of
her elopement, as far from his goal as before.
It may seem strange that, not loving her, he
should prize so highly the demonstrations of
affection from her; but those who have probed
the dark and intricate windings of the heart,
know the persistency of an unsatisfied desire,
and, above all, know the tyrannous nature of
vanity. To this must be added the peculiar
condition of Maxwell: the condition of a man
intensely vain, who had never before been loved,
and who had, as it were, staked his existence on
subduing this one woman's heart.
What a life was theirs! A life of ceaseless
suspicion, and of ceaseless dread—of bitter
exasperation, and of keen remorse—of unsatisfied
demands, and of baffled hope.
It lasted nearly two years. Then Maxwell,
at the conclusion of some brutal quarrel, burst
another bloodvessel, and his life was despaired
of. Mary was his nurse; he would have no
other. She had to sit up with him; to attend
upon him; to submit to his petty irritability,
made worse by illness; to watch him in his
restless slumbers, hoping that each time he
closed his eyes would be the last.
One night—it was the very night on which
this chapter opened—she sat by his side
absorbed in gloomy thought. The candle was
flaring in the socket. Everything was still.
The dying man slept peacefully. With her
hands drooping upon her lap, she sat allowing
her thoughts to wander; and they wandered
into the dim future, when, released from her
tyrant, she was once more a happy woman.
Long did she indulge in that sweet reverie, and
when it ceased, she turned her head mechanically
to look upon the sleeper. He was wide awake:
his dull eyes were fixed intently upon her; and
a shiver ran all over her body as she met that
gaze!
"I am not dead yet!" he said, as if he had
interpreted her thoughts.
She trembled slightly. With a sneer, he
closed his eyes again.
Silently she sat by his side, communing with
her own dark thoughts. He slept again; slept
soundly. She rose, and moved about the room;
it did not awaken him. She took courage:—crept
down stairs, unfastened the door—and
fled.
Fled, and left her tyrant dying;—fled, and
left him without a human being to attend upon
him—left him to die there like a dog; or to
recover, if it should chance so. She cared not;
her only thought was flight; and, winged with
terror, she flew from the accursed home of guilt
and wretchedness; and felt her heart beat
distractedly, as, a homeless, penniless wanderer,
she urged her steps along that dusty road under
the quiet shining moon.
Ten days afterwards, Meredith Vyner received
a long letter from his wife, detailing the
misery of her penniless condition, and imploring
pecuniary aid. The poor, old man wept bitterly
over the letter, and again reproached himself
with having been the cause of her ruin. He
could not forget that he had loved her—had
been happy with her. He forgave her for not
having loved one so old as himself; and wrote
to her the following reply:—
WYTTON HALL, 2nd August, 1845.
"MY DEAR WIFE,
"We have both need of forgiveness—you
have mine. I know I am not young
enough to be loved by you:
Durum! sed levius fit patientia
Quidquid corrigere est nefas,
as our favourite says—not that the quotation
is very good. But if you can have patience,
as I can have; if you can forget all
'incompatibilities,' and live quietly and not unhappily
with me, come back again, and all shall be
forgotten. I will do my best to make you
happy, I promise that nothing of what has
passed shall ever be recurred to. You shall
again be mistress of my house and fortune.
"But I do not wish to force you even to
this. If, on deliberate reflection, you think you
cannot live comfortably with me, I have given
instructions to Messrs. Barton and Hadley to
remit you, wherever you may choose to reside,
eight hundred pounds a year. Upon this you
can live in all comfort in France. With every
wish for your happiness,
"Believe me, my dear Wife,
"Yours affectionately,
"H. S. MEREDITH VYNER."
This letter never reached Mrs. Vyner.
Believing that her application had been treated
with the silent scorn it deserved, she left the
town, and toiled her way to a neighbouring
town, where a young woman, formerly one of her
maids, kept a small magazin de modes, and
offered a temporary asylum. There she
endeavoured to earn a subsistence by teaching
English; and at first, success crowned her
efforts; but having been recognised by an
English traveller spending a few days there, the
fact of her having eloped from her husband
became bruited about, and all her pupils left her.
She was forced to quit the place, and to seek
refuge and oblivion in Paris. What bitter
humiliations, and what severe trials, she had
there to undergo may be readily conceived. A
mystery hangs over her fate; she was seen once
on the Boulevard du Temple, miserably dressed,
and so aged by suffering, that every trace of
beauty had disappeared; but nothing has since
been heard of her.
Concerning the other persons of this tale, I
have few particulars to add.
Mrs. Langley Turner has married Lord ——,
and now gives as many parties as before, only
they are fearfully dull: perhaps because so
much more "select;" for it is a very serious
truth, that your high people are anything but
entertaining.
Frank Forrester has seen many ups and
downs; but the last time I saw him, his cab
splashed me with mud as I lounged down
St. James's-street.
Rose has two chubby children, who promise
to have the spirit of the mother; they keep
the nursery in a constant uproar!
Violet has one large, dark-eyed, solemn boy,
who, though not a twelvemonth old, looks at
you with such thoughtful seriousness, that you
are puzzled what to say to him; and I refrained
tickling him under the chin, lest he should
consider it as unseemly trifling; and as to
talking to him about his tootsy-pootsies being
vezzy pitty—that never could enter the mind
even of the most ignorant nurse.
Marmaduke continues his political career
with dignity and success; Violet cheering him
on, and loving him with all her large heart, so
that Rose declares, except herself and Julius,
she knows of nobody so happy as these two;—Violet
disputes the exception.
And Captain Heath? The narration of his
happiness is a bonne bouche I have reserved for
the last.
The whole family were at Wytton Hall, and
though so happy in themselves, frequent were
their inquiries as to when the captain was to
come down—only one person never asked that
question, and that person was Blanche; the
reason of her silence I leave to be guessed.
He came at last; came not to see the mild,
affectionate greeting of a sister from his much
loved Blanche, but the delight, embarrassment,
and pain of one who loved and dared not avow
it. He had been absent three months. During
that absence, she discovered her love. At first,
she merely felt a certain weariness; next,
succeeded melancholy; next, impatience to see
him; and finally, the yearning of her heart
proclaimed she loved him.
Yes: such is the imperfection of poor human
nature, that it cannot reach the circulating
library standard; with our best efforts to be
forlorn and disconsolate, we will accept of
society and consolation; with the strongest
idea of the virtue of constancy, a loving heart
cannot but love!
Blanche was embarrassed when she saw her
lover again! and he, poor fellow! was too modest
to understand her embarrassment. In vain did
they ramble about the grounds together, not a
syllable did he breathe of his love. Blanche
began to be almost fretful.
One morning they were playing with Rose
Blanche together, and the little toddler having
climbed upon his knee, declared she intended
to "mazzy Captain Heath some day;" upon
which her mama said a leetle pettishly: "No,
my darling, Captain Heath is not a marrying
man. He is to be an old bachelor."
Captain Heath made no reply, for he could
not tell her why he was condemned to be an
old bachelor.
Yet, that very afternoon, as they were strolling
through the wood together, and the conversation
turned upon her child, he was moved
by some mysterious impulse, to take her hand
in his, and with a faltering voice, to say,—
"Blanche ... dearest Blanche ... forgive me
for what I am now going to say ... refuse the
offer if you will, but do not be offended with me
for making it ... Your child, Blanche, is growing
up ... She will soon need a better protector
than even your love ... she ... I hope you
will not misunderstand me ... I know you
cannot love me ... though I have loved you so
many years ... but I am grown used to that
... I have loved you, Blanche, for years, scarcely
ever with the hope of a return, and latterly,
with the certainty, that my love was hopeless
... But when I offer myself as a husband ... as
a protector to you, and to your child ... I
do that which, if it would not pain you, I
feel to be right ... I want to have a husband's
authority for devoting my life to you. I do not
ask your love...!"
Her head was turned away, and her eyes
were filling with tears—tears of exquisite pain,
of inexpressible delight; as these words, "I do
not ask your love," thrilled through her, she
suddenly turned and looked him full in the
face.
Was it her blushing tremor, was it her undisguised
tenderness which spoke so clearly to the
yearning heart of her lover? I know not.
Love has a language of its own, untranslatable
by any words of ours, and that language in its
mystic, yet unequivocal voice, told Captain
Heath, that he was loved.
Printed by STEWART and MURRAY, Old Bailey.