by Dixie Hines.
Illustrations by Charles Roy Bowers and A. J.
Bjornstad.
EAUTY
is only paint-deep at times.
Only the brave can handle the fair.
A pretty girl envies but one girl—a
prettier one.
Many a poor husband is created from
a rich man.
While there is an engagement there’s hope—of liberty.
Men can persuade a woman to do anything she wants to.
Men can be classified; women cannot even be pacified.
A woman’s idea of happiness is to be ideally miserable.
A woman will break a heart as readily as she will crack
a smile.
No married man ever was a fool without being told of
the fact.
The grass widow is not alone in making hay while the
sun shines.
A bachelor is a man who has given serious thought to
matrimony.
Bachelors form their opinion of marriage by experience—of
others.
There is nothing new under the sun except hat styles
for women.
“A woman imagines she can cover up her imperfections
by pointing out those of other women.”
Every girl would love to be a thing of beauty and a
boy forever.
When a woman proves equal to all a man expects she
is a sur-prize.
It isn’t nearly so hard to be a fool over a widow as
not to be one.
Every woman secretly admires the wisdom of the man
who flatters her.
A woman may conceal her faults, but a decollete gown
is less deceptive.
The blush of a bashful girl is a flush that takes any
hand—and heart.
“The cup of happiness” with men of experience has a
siphon on the side.
Every woman has a horror of old age, but not so much
as of young death.
Women are never satisfied. First they want a voter and
then they want a vote.
Some men are born to trouble, while others merely
achieve it by marriage.
There is but one kind of love, yet every woman has a
different idea about it.
Men, manners and morals change, but woman, never—from
the changeable.
A man may be “out front” at the opera and yet be able
only to “see back”—if he is with her.
Every woman expects a man to think for her, and then
she reverses his opinion.
When it comes to singing the praises of another, most
women have a sore throat.
Man’s principal safeguard against matrimony is that
widows are made, not born.
Many a promising housekeeping career has been ruined
in an unpromising stage career.
Men have found many antidotes for a woman, but the
surest of all is another woman.
A woman spends one-half of her time telling lies for
men and the other half to them.
Women often know a man is in love with them when
the man never discovers the fact.
Men often find it necessary to choose between the inconstant
and the unattractive woman.
A woman keeps a man running all the time—first it is
after her and then it is from her.
If women did not know that men could overcome their
resistance they would seldom resist.
There are two ways in which a woman may win a man:
Her own brilliancy and his inanity.
When a man is at the feet of woman it is pretty sure
that another woman threw him there.
Every woman wants a man to be real devilish before
marriage and real angelic afterwards.
Anyhow, there was one woman who was never jealous.
Adam didn’t have troubles about that.
A woman imagines she can cover up her imperfections
by pointing out those of other women.
Some men are born wise, some achieve wisdom by
experience, and some just don’t marry.
Two kinds of women make trouble in the world—those
that are married and those that are not.
There is but one class of women who are not interested
in the fashions and they are the dead ones.
The philosopher said a woman could not argue—he
was too wise to say that she could not talk.
The reason so many men find marriage unattractive is
because life was so attractive before marriage.
It isn’t a hard matter for a woman to make a man love
her. The difficulty is in making him keep it up.
A woman can make up two things at the same time—her
face and her mind; but her face lasts longer.
The world has no sympathy to waste on those reckless
enough to wed when both have been married before.
If a man does not tell a woman he loves her she thinks
him impossible; if he does, he knows himself foolish.
When a woman says that all she wants is what she
deserves she really means she deserves all she wants.
When a girl reaches that uncertain age and is yet
unmarried, she is often worse than she paints herself.
Sometimes there is more truth than sentiment when a man
tells a woman a thing is as plain as the nose on her face.
No one has ever yet discovered why a woman is afraid
of a mouse and tackles a six-foot man with confidence.
A woman will start a flirtation in fun and then wonder
why a man won’t follow her when she gets serious.
If a man wants to make a fool of himself he can find
many opportunities, but the surest way is over a woman.
Men and women both agree that it is inadvisable to live
without each other and impossible to live with each other.
Whether a married man pities or envies his bachelor
friends depends entirely upon how long he has been married.
If a man really wants to start something with himself,
let him try to love a woman just as a woman wants to be
loved.
The best way to find out what a girl who is in love with
a man thinks of woman suffrage is to find out what he
thinks.
A man may escape the measles, or automobiles, or even
being indicted, but no man has ever been known to escape
a widow.
No woman ever told a man she hated him without
meaning it; some women have told men they loved them
and meant it.
Rather than a man should be right and belong to
another woman, a woman would have him wrong and
belong to her.
The reason widows are so attractive to men is because
they will allow themselves to be taught things they already
know too well.
A girl will gaze for three hours and a half at the moon
and then wonder why she hasn’t time to sew a button on
her brother’s vest.
The happiest man is he who will take a woman’s protestations
like he does a dose of medicine—with celestial
faith in the giver.
When a woman fails to see an opportunity to be generous
to another woman it is not necessarily a sign of
defective eye-sight.
Don’t misunderstand a man when he tells a woman she
is sweet enough to eat—maybe he is thinking of the forthcoming
restaurant-check.
Between the ages of sixteen and thirty a woman is a
general practitioner in the field of love; after that she is
satisfied to become a specialist.
A man is willing to worship at the shrine of a woman
with whom he is in love until he meets another woman—then
he changes his religion.
The question will never be settled between women as to
which will win a man quicker, a pair of silk stockings or
an ability to bake a good cake.
If ever the fact that there are no marriages in Heaven
is generally believed by women, half of the preachers will
be obliged to seek other employment.
If a woman were obliged to express a preference, she
would choose the man who pleases but does not love, to
the man who loves but does not please, her.
Women are said to be more “clean-minded” than men.
Men might meet feminine competition if they resorted to
the stratagem of changing their minds as often.
The greatest disappointment after marriage comes to a
man when he realizes that his wife does not look like the
models in the shop windows during a white-goods sale.
A man can protect himself from the things said about
him by the women who don’t love him. It’s the things
said about him by the woman who does love him that
keep him worried.
Women, says a sage, are like books: No man can judge
the inside by what is displayed on the outside. It is a
poor rule that won’t work both ways. Women are unlike
books: When one has finished with a book it can be
closed up.
Drawn by E. M. Ashe.
