“Guard! What place is this?”
“Mugby Junction, sir.”
“A windy place!”
“Yes, it mostly is, sir.”
“And looks comfortless indeed!”
“Yes, it generally does, sir.”
“Is it a rainy night still?”
“Pours, sir.”
“Open the door. I’ll get out.”
“You’ll have, sir,” said the guard,
glistening with drops of wet, and looking at the tearful face of
his watch by the light of his lantern as the traveller descended,
“three minutes here.”
“More, I think.—For I am not going on.”
“Thought you had a through ticket, sir?”
“So I have, but I shall sacrifice the rest of
it. I want my luggage.”
“Please to come to the van and point it out, sir.
Be good enough to look very sharp, sir. Not a moment to
spare.”
The guard hurried to the luggage van, and the traveller
hurried after him. The guard got into it, and the traveller
looked into it.
“Those two large black portmanteaus in the corner where
your light shines. Those are mine.”
“Name upon ’em, sir?”
“Barbox Brothers.”
“Stand clear, sir, if you please. One.
Two. Right!”
Lamp waved. Signal lights ahead already changing.
Shriek from engine. Train gone.
“Mugby Junction!” said the traveller, pulling up
the woollen muffler round his throat with both hands.
“At past three o’clock of a tempestuous
morning! So!”
He spoke to himself. There was no one else to speak
to. Perhaps, though there had been any one else to speak
to, he would have preferred to speak to himself. Speaking
to himself, he spoke to a man within five years of fifty either
way, who had turned grey too soon, like a neglected fire; a man
of pondering habit, brooding carriage of the head, and suppressed
internal voice; a man with many indications on him of having been
much alone.
He stood unnoticed on the dreary platform, except by the
rain and by the wind. Those two vigilant assailants made a
rush at him. “Very well,” said he,
yielding. “It signifies nothing to me, to what
quarter I turn my face.”
Thus, at Mugby Junction, at past three o’clock of a
tempestuous morning, the traveller went where the weather drove
him.
Not but what he could make a stand when he was so minded, for,
coming to the end of the roofed shelter (it is of considerable
extent at Mugby Junction) and looking out upon the dark night,
with a yet darker spirit-wing of storm beating its wild way
through it, he faced about, and held his own as ruggedly in the
difficult direction, as he had held it in the easier one.
Thus, with a steady step, the traveller went up and down, up and
down, up and down, seeking nothing, and finding it.
A place replete with shadowy shapes, this Mugby Junction in
the black hours of the four-and-twenty. Mysterious goods
trains, covered with palls and gliding on like vast weird
funerals, conveying themselves guiltily away from the presence of
the few lighted lamps, as if their freight had come to a secret
and unlawful end. Half miles of coal pursuing in a
Detective manner, following when they lead, stopping when they
stop, backing when they back. Red hot embers showering out
upon the ground, down this dark avenue, and down the
other, as if torturing fires were being raked clear;
concurrently, shrieks and groans and grinds invading the ear, as
if the tortured were at the height of their suffering.
Iron-barred cages full of cattle jangling by midway, the drooping
beasts with horns entangled, eyes frozen with terror, and mouths
too: at least they have long icicles (or what seem so) hanging
from their lips. Unknown languages in the air, conspiring
in red, green, and white characters. An earthquake
accompanied with thunder and lightning, going up express to
London.
Now, all quiet, all rusty, wind and rain in possession, lamps
extinguished, Mugby Junction dead and indistinct, with its robe
drawn over its head, like Cæsar. Now, too, as the
belated traveller plodded up and down, a shadowy train went by
him in the gloom which was no other than the train of a
life. From whatsoever intangible deep cutting or dark
tunnel it emerged, here it came, unsummoned and unannounced,
stealing upon him and passing away into obscurity. Here,
mournfully went by, a child who had never had a childhood or
known a parent, inseparable from a youth with a bitter sense of
his namelessness, coupled to a man the enforced business of whose
best years had been distasteful and oppressive, linked to an
ungrateful friend, dragging after him a woman once beloved. Attendant, with many a clank and wrench,
were lumbering cares, dark meditations, huge dim disappointments,
monotonous years, a long jarring line of the discords of a
solitary and unhappy existence.
“—Yours, sir?”
The traveller recalled his eyes from the waste into which they
had been staring, and fell back a step or so under the
abruptness, and perhaps the chance appropriateness, of the
question.
“O! My thoughts were not here for the
moment. Yes. Yes. Those two portmanteaus are
mine. Are you a Porter?”
“On Porter’s wages, sir. But I am
Lamps.”
The traveller looked a little confused.
“Who did you say you are?”
“Lamps, sir,” showing an oily cloth in his hand,
as further explanation.
“Surely, surely. Is there any hotel or tavern
here?”
“Not exactly here, sir. There is a Refreshment
Room here, but—” Lamps, with a mighty serious
look, gave his head a warning roll that plainly
added—“but it’s a blessed circumstance for you
that it’s not open.”
“You couldn’t recommend it, I see, if it was
available?”
“Ask your pardon, sir. If it
was—?”
“Open?”
“It ain’t my place, as a paid servant of the company to give my opinion on any of the company’s
toepics,” he pronounced it more like toothpicks,
“beyond lamp-ile and cottons,” returned Lamps, in a
confidential tone; “but speaking as a man, I wouldn’t
recommend my father (if he was to come to life again) to go and
try how he’d be treated at the Refreshment Room. Not
speaking as a man, no, I would not.”
The traveller nodded conviction. “I suppose I can
put up in the town? There is a town here?” For
the traveller (though a stay-at-home compared with most
travellers) had been, like many others, carried on the steam
winds and the iron tides through that Junction before, without
having ever, as one might say, gone ashore there.
“O yes, there’s a town, sir. Anyways
there’s town enough to put up in. But,”
following the glance of the other at his luggage, “this is
a very dead time of the night with us, sir. The deadest
time. I might a’most call it our deadest and
buriedest time.”
“No porters about?”
“Well, sir, you see,” returned Lamps, confidential
again, “they in general goes off with the gas.
That’s how it is. And they seem to have overlooked
you, through your walking to the furder end of the
platform. But in about twelve minutes or so, she may be
up.”
“Who may be up?”
“The three forty-two, sir. She goes off in a
sidin’ till the Up X passes, and then she,” here an
air of hopeful vagueness pervaded Lamps, “doos all as lays
in her power.”
“I doubt if I comprehend the arrangement.”
“I doubt if anybody do, sir. She’s a
Parliamentary, sir. And, you see, a Parliamentary, or a
Skirmishun—”
“Do you mean an Excursion?”
“That’s it, sir.—A Parliamentary, or a
Skirmishun, she mostly doos go off into a
sidin’. But when she can get a chance,
she’s whistled out of it, and she’s whistled up into
doin’ all as,” Lamps again wore the air of a highly
sanguine man who hoped for the best, “all as lays in her
power.”
He then explained that porters on duty being required to be in
attendance on the Parliamentary matron in question, would
doubtless turn up with the gas. In the meantime, if the
gentleman would not very much object to the smell of lamp-oil,
and would accept the warmth of his little room.—The
gentleman being by this time very cold, instantly closed with the
proposal.
A greasy little cabin it was, suggestive to the sense of
smell, of a cabin in a Whaler. But there was a bright fire
burning in its rusty grate, and on the floor there stood a wooden
stand of newly trimmed and lighted lamps, ready for carriage
service. They made a bright show, and their
light, and the warmth, accounted for the popularity of the room,
as borne witness to by many impressions of velveteen trousers on
a form by the fire, and many rounded smears and smudges of
stooping velveteen shoulders on the adjacent wall. Various
untidy shelves accommodated a quantity of lamps and oil-cans, and
also a fragrant collection of what looked like the
pocket-handkerchiefs of the whole lamp family.
As Barbox Brothers (so to call the traveller on the warranty
of his luggage) took his seat upon the form, and warmed his now
ungloved hands at the fire, he glanced aside at a little deal
desk, much blotched with ink, which his elbow touched. Upon
it, were some scraps of coarse paper, and a superannuated steel
pen in very reduced and gritty circumstances.
From glancing at the scraps of paper, he turned involuntarily
to his host, and said, with some roughness—
“Why, you are never a poet, man!”
Lamps had certainly not the conventional appearance of one, as
he stood modestly rubbing his squab nose with a handkerchief so
exceedingly oily, that he might have been in the act of mistaking
himself for one of his charges. He was a spare man of about
the Barbox Brothers’ time of life, with his features
whimsically drawn upward as if they were attracted by the roots
of his hair. He had a peculiarly
shining transparent complexion, probably occasioned by constant
oleaginous application; and his attractive hair, being cut short,
and being grizzled, and standing straight up on end as if it in
its turn were attracted by some invisible magnet above it, the
top of his head was not very unlike a lamp-wick.
“But to be sure it’s no business of mine,”
said Barbox Brothers. “That was an impertinent
observation on my part. Be what you like.”
“Some people, sir,” remarked Lamps, in a tone of
apology, “are sometimes what they don’t
like.”
“Nobody knows that better than I do,” sighed the
other. “I have been what I don’t like, all my
life.”
“When I first took, sir,” resumed Lamps, “to
composing little Comic-Songs-like—”
Barbox Brothers eyed him with great disfavour.
“—To composing little Comic-Songs-like—and
what was more hard—to singing ’em afterwards,”
said Lamps, “it went against the grain at that time, it did
indeed.”
Something that was not all oil here shining in Lamps’s
eye, Barbox Brothers withdrew his own a little disconcerted,
looked at the fire, and put a foot on the top bar.
“Why did you do it, then?” he asked, after a short
pause; abruptly enough but in a softer tone. “If you didn’t want to do it, why did you do it?
Where did you sing them? Public-house?”
To which Mr. Lamps returned the curious reply:
“Bedside.”
At this moment, while the traveller looked at him for
elucidation, Mugby Junction started suddenly, trembled violently,
and opened its gas eyes. “She’s got up!”
Lamps announced, excited. “What lays in her power is
sometimes more, and sometimes less; but it’s laid in her
power to get up to-night, by George!”
The legend “Barbox Brothers” in large white
letters on two black surfaces, was very soon afterwards trundling
on a truck through a silent street, and, when the owner of the
legend had shivered on the pavement half an hour, what time the
porter’s knocks at the Inn Door knocked up the whole town
first, and the Inn last, he groped his way into the close air of
a shut-up house, and so groped between the sheets of a shut-up
bed that seemed to have been expressly refrigerated for him when
last made.
“You remember me, Young Jackson?”
“What do I remember if not you? You are my first
remembrance. It was you who told me that was my name.
It was you who told me that on every twentieth of December my life had a penitential anniversary in it called a
birthday. I suppose the last communication was truer than
the first!”
“What am I like, Young Jackson?”
“You are like a blight all through the year, to
me. You hard-lined, thin-lipped, repressive, changeless
woman with a wax mask on. You are like the Devil to me;
most of all when you teach me religious things, for you make me
abhor them.”
“You remember me, Mr. Young Jackson?” In
another voice from another quarter.
“Most gratefully, sir. You were the ray of hope
and prospering ambition in my life. When I attended your
course, I believed that I should come to be a great healer, and I
felt almost happy—even though I was still the one boarder
in the house with that horrible mask, and ate and drank in
silence and constraint with the mask before me, every day.
As I had done every, every, every day, through my school-time and
from my earliest recollection.”
“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”
“You are like a Superior Being to me. You are like
Nature beginning to reveal herself to me. I hear you again,
as one of the hushed crowd of young men kindling under the power
of your presence and knowledge, and you bring into my eyes the
only exultant tears that ever stood in them.”
“You remember Me, Mr. Young Jackson?”
In a grating voice from quite another quarter.
“Too well. You made your ghostly appearance in my
life one day, and announced that its course was to be suddenly
and wholly changed. You showed me which was my wearisome
seat in the Galley of Barbox Brothers. (When they
were, if they ever were, is unknown to me; there was nothing of
them but the name when I bent to the oar.) You told me what
I was to do, and what to be paid; you told me afterwards, at
intervals of years, when I was to sign for the Firm, when I
became a partner, when I became the Firm. I know no more of
it, or of myself.”
“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”
“You are like my father, I sometimes think. You
are hard enough and cold enough so to have brought up an
unacknowledged son. I see your scanty figure, your close
brown suit, and your tight brown wig; but you, too, wear a wax
mask to your death. You never by a chance remove
it—it never by a chance falls off—and I know no more
of you.”
Throughout this dialogue, the traveller spoke to himself at
his window in the morning, as he had spoken to himself at the
Junction over-night. And as he had then looked in the
darkness, a man who had turned grey too soon, like a neglected
fire: so he now looked in the sunlight, an ashier
grey, like a fire which the brightness of the sun put out.
The firm of Barbox Brothers had been some offshoot or
irregular branch of the Public Notary and bill-broking
tree. It had gained for itself a griping reputation before
the days of Young Jackson, and the reputation had stuck to it and
to him. As he had imperceptibly come into possession of the
dim den up in the corner of a court off Lombard-street, on whose
grimy windows the inscription Barbox Brothers had for many long
years daily interposed itself between him and the sky, so he had
insensibly found himself a personage held in chronic distrust,
whom it was essential to screw tight to every transaction in
which he engaged, whose word was never to be taken without his
attested bond, whom all dealers with openly set up guards and
wards against. This character had come upon him through no
act of his own. It was as if the original Barbox had
stretched himself down upon the office-floor, and had thither
caused to be conveyed Young Jackson in his sleep, and had there
effected a metempsychosis and exchange of persons with him.
The discovery—aided in its turn by the deceit of the only
woman he had ever loved, and the deceit of the only friend he had
ever made: who eloped from him to be married together—the
discovery, so followed up, completed what his
earliest rearing had begun. He shrank, abashed, within the
form of Barbox, and lifted up his head and heart no more.
But he did at last effect one great release in his
condition. He broke the oar he had plied so long, and he
scuttled and sank the galley. He prevented the gradual
retirement of an old conventional business from him, by taking
the initiative and retiring from it. With enough to live on
(though after all with not too much), he obliterated the firm of
Barbox Brothers from the pages of the Post-office Directory and
the face of the earth, leaving nothing of it but its name on two
portmanteaus.
“For one must have some name in going about, for people
to pick up,” he explained to Mugby High-street, through the
Inn-window, “and that name at least was real once.
Whereas, Young Jackson!—Not to mention its being a sadly
satirical misnomer for Old Jackson.”
He took up his hat and walked out, just in time to see,
passing along on the opposite side of the way, a velveteen man,
carrying his day’s dinner in a small bundle that might have
been larger without suspicion of gluttony, and pelting away
towards the Junction at a great pace.
“There’s Lamps!” said Barbox Brother.
“And by-the-by—”
Ridiculous, surely, that a man so serious, so
self-contained, and not yet three days emancipated from a routine
of drudgery, should stand rubbing his chin in the street, in a
brown study about Comic Songs.
“Bedside?” said Barbox Brothers, testily.
“Sings them at the bedside? Why at the bedside,
unless he goes to bed drunk? Does, I shouldn’t
wonder. But it’s no business of mine. Let me
see. Mugby Junction, Mugby Junction. Where shall I go
next? As it came into my head last night when I woke from
an uneasy sleep in the carriage and found myself here, I can go
anywhere from here. Where shall I go? I’ll go
and look at the Junction by daylight. There’s no
hurry, and I may like the look of one Line better than
another.”
But there were so many Lines. Gazing down upon them from
a bridge at the Junction, it was as if the concentrating
Companies formed a great Industrial Exhibition of the works of
extraordinary ground-spiders that spun iron. And then so
many of the Lines went such wonderful ways, so crossing and
curving among one another, that the eye lost them. And then
some of them appeared to start with the fixed intention of going
five hundred miles, and all of a sudden gave it up at an
insignificant barrier, or turned off into a workshop. And then others, like intoxicated men,
went a little way very straight, and surprisingly slued round and
came back again. And then others were so chock-full of
trucks of coal, others were so blocked with trucks of casks,
others were so gorged with trucks of ballast, others were so set
apart for wheeled objects like immense iron cotton-reels: while
others were so bright and clear, and others were so delivered
over to rust and ashes and idle wheelbarrows out of work, with
their legs in the air (looking much like their masters on
strike), that there was no beginning, middle, or end, to the
bewilderment.
Barbox Brothers stood puzzled on the bridge, passing his right
hand across the lines on his forehead, which multiplied while he
looked down, as if the railway Lines were getting themselves
photographed on that sensitive plate. Then, was heard a
distant ringing of bells and blowing of whistles. Then,
puppet-looking heads of men popped out of boxes in perspective,
and popped in again. Then, prodigious wooden razors set up
on end, began shaving the atmosphere. Then, several
locomotive engines in several directions began to scream and be
agitated. Then, along one avenue a train came in.
Then, along another two trains appeared that didn’t come
in, but stopped without. Then, bits of trains broke off. Then, a struggling horse became involved with
them. Then, the locomotives shared the bits of trains, and
ran away with the whole.
“I have not made my next move much clearer by
this. No hurry. No need to make up my mind to-day, or
to-morrow, nor yet the day after. I’ll take a
walk.”
It fell out somehow (perhaps he meant it should) that the walk
tended to the platform at which he had alighted, and to
Lamps’s room. But Lamps was not in his room. A
pair of velveteen shoulders were adapting themselves to one of
the impressions on the wall by Lamps’s fireplace, but
otherwise the room was void. In passing back to get out of
the station again, he learnt the cause of this vacancy, by
catching sight of Lamps on the opposite line of railway, skipping
along the top of a train, from carriage to carriage, and catching
lighted namesakes thrown up to him by a coadjutor.
“He is busy. He has not much time for composing or
singing Comic Songs this morning, I take it.”
The direction he pursued now, was into the country, keeping
very near to the side of one great Line of railway, and within
easy view of others. “I have half a mind,” he
said, glancing around, “to settle the question from this
point, by saying, ‘I’ll take this set of
rails, or that, or t’other, and stick to it.’
They separate themselves from the confusion, out here, and go
their ways.”
Ascending a gentle hill of some extent, he came to a few
cottages. There, looking about him as a very reserved man
might who had never looked about him in his life before, he saw
some six or eight young children come merrily trooping and
whooping from one of the cottages, and disperse. But not
until they had all turned at the little garden gate, and kissed
their hands to a face at the upper window: a low window enough,
although the upper, for the cottage had but a story of one room
above the ground.
Now, that the children should do this was nothing; but that
they should do this to a face lying on the sill of the open
window, turned towards them in a horizontal position, and
apparently only a face, was something noticeable. He looked
up at the window again. Could only see a very fragile
though a very bright face, lying on one cheek on the
window-sill. The delicate smiling face of a girl or
woman. Framed in long bright brown hair, round which was
tied a light blue band or fillet, passing under the chin.
He walked on, turned back, passed the window again, shyly
glanced up again. No change. He struck off by a
winding branch-road at the top of the hill—which he must
otherwise have descended—kept the cottages in
view, worked his way round at a distance so as to come out once
more into the main road and be obliged to pass the cottages
again. The face still lay on the window-sill, but not so
much inclined towards him. And now there were a pair of
delicate hands too. They had the action of performing on
some musical instrument, and yet it produced no sound that
reached his ears.
“Mugby Junction must be the maddest place in
England,” said Barbox Brothers, pursuing his way down the
hill. “The first thing I find here is a Railway
Porter who composes comic songs to sing at his bedside. The
second thing I find here is a face, and a pair of hands playing a
musical instrument that don’t play!”
The day was a fine bright day in the early beginning of
November, the air was clear and inspiriting, and the landscape
was rich in beautiful colours. The prevailing colours in
the court off Lombard-street, London city, had been few and
sombre. Sometimes, when the weather elsewhere was very
bright indeed, the dwellers in those tents enjoyed a
pepper-and-salt-coloured day or two, but their atmosphere’s
usual wear was slate, or snuff colour.
He relished his walk so well, that he repeated it next
day. He was a little earlier at the cottage than on the day
before, and he could hear the children up-stairs
singing to a regular measure and clapping out the time with their
hands.
“Still, there is no sound of any musical
instrument,” he said, listening at the corner, “and
yet I saw the performing hands again, as I came by. What
are the children singing? Why, good Lord, they can never be
singing the multiplication-table!”
They were though, and with infinite enjoyment. The
mysterious face had a voice attached to it which occasionally led
or set the children right. Its musical cheerfulness was
delightful. The measure at length stopped, and was
succeeded by a murmuring of young voices, and then by a short
song which he made out to be about the current month of the year,
and about what work it yielded to the labourers in the fields and
farm-yards. Then, there was a stir of little feet, and the
children came trooping and whooping out, as on the previous
day. And again, as on the previous day, they all turned at
the garden gate, and kissed their hands—evidently to the
face on the window-sill, though Barbox Brothers from his retired
post of disadvantage at the corner could not see it.
But as the children dispersed, he cut off one small
straggler—a brown faced boy with flaxen hair—and said
to him:
“Come here, little one. Tell me whose house is
that?”
The child, with one swarthy arm held up across his eyes,
half in shyness, and half ready for defence, said from behind the
inside of his elbow:
“Phœbe’s.”
“And who,” said Barbox Brothers, quite as much
embarrassed by his part in the dialogue as the child could
possibly be by his, “is Phœbe?”
To which the child made answer: “Why, Phœbe, of
course.”
The small but sharp observer had eyed his questioner closely,
and had taken his moral measure. He lowered his guard, and
rather assumed a tone with him: as having discovered him to be an
unaccustomed person in the art of polite conversation.
“Phœbe,” said the child, “can’t
be anybobby else but Phœbe. Can she?”
“No, I suppose not.”
“Well,” returned the child, “then why did
you ask me?”
Deeming it prudent to shift his ground, Barbox Brothers took
up a new position.
“What do you do there? Up there in that room where
the open window is. What do you do there?”
“Cool,” said the child.
“Eh?”
“Co-o-ol,” the child repeated in a louder voice,
lengthening out the word with a fixed look and
great emphasis, as much as to say: “What’s the use of
your having grown up, if you’re such a donkey as not to
understand me?”
“Ah! School, school,” said Barbox
Brothers. “Yes, yes, yes. And Phœbe
teaches you?”
The child nodded.
“Good boy.”
“Tound it out, have you?” said the child.
“Yes, I have found it out. What would you do with
twopence, if I gave it you?”
“Pend it.”
The knock-down promptitude of this reply leaving him not a leg
to stand upon, Barbox Brothers produced the twopence with great
lameness, and withdrew in a state of humiliation.
But, seeing the face on the window-sill as he passed the
cottage, he acknowledged its presence there with a gesture, which
was not a nod, not a bow, not a removal of his hat from his head,
but was a diffident compromise between or struggle with all
three. The eyes in the face seemed amused, or cheered, or
both, and the lips modestly said: “Good day to you,
sir.”
“I find I must stick for a time to Mugby
Junction,” said Barbox Brothers, with much gravity, after
once more stopping on his return road to look at the Lines where
they went their several ways so quietly. “I
can’t make up my mind yet, which iron road to
take. In fact, I must get a little accustomed to the
Junction before I can decide.”
So, he announced at the Inn that he was “going to stay
on, for the present,” and improved his acquaintance with
the Junction that night, and again next morning, and again next
night and morning: going down to the station, mingling with the
people there, looking about him down all the avenues of railway,
and beginning to take an interest in the incomings and outgoings
of the trains. At first, he often put his head into
Lamps’s little room, but he never found Lamps there.
A pair or two of velveteen shoulders he usually found there,
stooping over the fire, sometimes in connexion with a clasped
knife and a piece of bread and meat; but the answer to his
inquiry, “Where’s Lamps?” was, either that he
was “t’other side the line,” or, that it was
his off-time, or (in the latter case), his own personal
introduction to another Lamps who was not his Lamps.
However, he was not so desperately set upon seeing Lamps now, but
he bore the disappointment. Nor did he so wholly devote
himself to his severe application to the study of Mugby Junction,
as to neglect exercise. On the contrary, he took a walk
every day, and always the same walk. But the weather turned
cold and wet again, and the window was never open.
At length, after a lapse of some days, there came another
streak of fine bright hardy autumn weather. It was a
Saturday. The window was open, and the children were
gone. Not surprising, this, for he had patiently watched
and waited at the corner, until they were gone.
“Good day,” he said to the face; absolutely
getting his hat clear off his head this time.
“Good day to you, sir.”
“I am glad you have a fine sky again, to look
at.”
“Thank you, sir. It is kind of you.”
“You are an invalid, I fear?”
“No, sir. I have very good health.”
“But are you not always lying down?”
“O yes, I am always lying down, because I cannot sit
up. But I am not an invalid.”
The laughing eyes seemed highly to enjoy his great
mistake.
“Would you mind taking the trouble to come in,
sir? There is a beautiful view from this window. And
you would see that I am not at all ill—being so good as to
care.”
It was said to help him, as he stood irresolute, but evidently
desiring to enter, with his diffident hand on the latch of the
garden gate. It did help him, and he went in.
The room up-stairs was a very clean white room with a
low roof. Its only inmate lay on a couch that brought her
face on a level with the window. The couch was white too;
and her simple dress or wrapper being light blue, like the band
around her hair, she had an ethereal look, and a fanciful
appearance of lying among clouds. He felt that she
instinctively perceived him to be by habit a downcast taciturn
man; it was another help to him to have established that
understanding so easily, and got it over.
There was an awkward constraint upon him, nevertheless, as he
touched her hand, and took a chair at the side of her couch.
“I see now,” he began, not at all fluently,
“how you occupy your hands. Only seeing you from the
path outside, I thought you were playing upon
something.”
She was engaged in very nimbly and dexterously making
lace. A lace-pillow lay upon her breast; and the quick
movements and changes of her hands upon it as she worked, had
given them the action he had misinterpreted.
“That is curious,” she answered, with a bright
smile. “For I often fancy, myself, that I play tunes
while I am at work.”
“Have you any musical knowledge?”
She shook her head.
“I think I could pick out tunes, if I had any
instrument, which could be made as handy to me as my
lace-pillow. But I dare say I deceive myself. At all
events, I shall never know.”
“You have a musical voice. Excuse me; I have heard
you sing.”
“With the children?” she answered, slightly
colouring. “O yes. I sing with the dear
children, if it can be called singing.”
Barbox Brothers glanced at the two small forms in the room,
and hazarded the speculation that she was fond of children, and
that she was learned in new systems of teaching them?
“Very fond of them,” she said, shaking her head
again; “but I know nothing of teaching, beyond the interest
I have in it, and the pleasure it gives me when they learn.
Perhaps your overhearing my little scholars sing some of their
lessons, has led you so far astray as to think me a grand
teacher? Ah! I thought so! No, I have only read and
been told about that system. It seemed so pretty and
pleasant, and to treat them so like the merry Robins they are,
that I took up with it in my little way. You don’t
need to be told what a very little way mine is, sir,” she
added, with a glance at the small forms and round the room.
All this time her hands were busy at her lace-pillow. As
they still continued so, and as there was a kind of substitute
for conversation in the click and play of its pegs, Barbox
Brothers took the opportunity of observing her. He guessed
her to be thirty. The charm of her
transparent face and large bright brown eyes, was, not that they
were passively resigned, but that they were actively and
thoroughly cheerful. Even her busy hands, which of their
own thinness alone might have besought compassion, plied their
task with a gay courage that made mere compassion an
unjustifiable assumption of superiority, and an impertinence.
He saw her eyes in the act of rising towards his, and he
directed his towards the prospect, saying: “Beautiful
indeed!”
“Most beautiful, sir. I have sometimes had a fancy
that I would like to sit up, for once, only to try how it looks
to an erect head. But what a foolish fancy that would be to
encourage! It cannot look more lovely to any one than it
does to me.”
Her eyes were turned to it as she spoke, with most delighted
admiration and enjoyment. There was not a trace in it of
any sense of deprivation.
“And those threads of railway, with their puffs of smoke
and steam changing places so fast, make it so lively for
me,” she went on. “I think of the number of
people who can go where they wish, on their business, or
their pleasure; I remember that the puffs make signs to me that
they are actually going while I look; and that enlivens the
prospect with abundance of company, if I want company.
There is the great Junction, too. I don’t see it under the foot of the hill, but I can very often hear
it, and I always know it is there. It seems to join me, in
a way, to I don’t know how many places and things that
I shall never see.”
With an abashed kind of idea that it might have already joined
himself to something he had never seen, he said constrainedly:
“Just so.”
“And so you see, sir,” pursued Phœbe,
“I am not the invalid you thought me, and I am very well
off indeed.”
“You have a happy disposition,” said Barbox
Brothers: perhaps with a slight excusatory touch for his own
disposition.
“Ah! But you should know my father,” she
replied. “His is the happy
disposition!—Don’t mind, sir!” For his
reserve took the alarm at a step upon the stairs, and he
distrusted that he would be set down for a troublesome
intruder. “This is my father coming.”
The door opened, and the father paused there.
“Why, Lamps!” exclaimed Barbox Brothers, starting
from his chair. “How do you do, Lamps?”
To which, Lamps responded: “The gentleman for
Nowhere! How do you do,
sir?”
And they shook hands, to the greatest admiration and surprise
of Lamps’s daughter.
“I have looked you up, half a dozen times since
that night,” said Barbox Brothers, “but have never
found you.”
“So I’ve heerd on, sir, so I’ve heerd
on,” returned Lamps. “It’s your being
noticed so often down at the Junction, without taking any train,
that has begun to get you the name among us of the gentleman for
Nowhere. No offence in my having called you by it when took
by surprise, I hope, sir?”
“None at all. It’s as good a name for me as
any other you could call me by. But may I ask you a
question in the corner here?”
Lamps suffered himself to be led aside from his
daughter’s couch, by one of the buttons of his velveteen
jacket.
“Is this the bedside where you sing your
songs?”
Lamps nodded.
The gentleman for Nowhere clapped him on the shoulder; and
they faced about again.
“Upon my word, my dear,” said Lamps then to his
daughter, looking from her to her visitor, “it is such an
amaze to me, to find you brought acquainted with this gentleman,
that I must (if this gentleman will excuse me) take a
rounder.”
Mr. Lamps demonstrated in action what this meant, by pulling
out his oily handkerchief rolled up in the form of a ball, and
giving himself an elaborate smear, from behind the right
ear, up the cheek, across the forehead, and down the other cheek
to behind his left ear. After this operation he shone
exceedingly.
“It’s according to my custom when particular
warmed up by any agitation, sir,” he offered by way of
apology. “And really, I am throwed into that state of
amaze by finding you brought acquainted with Phœbe, that
I—that I think I will, if you’ll excuse me, take
another rounder.” Which he did, seeming to be greatly
restored by it.
They were now both standing by the side of her couch, and she
was working at her lace-pillow. “Your daughter tells
me,” said Barbox Brothers, still in a half reluctant
shamefaced way, “that she never sits up.”
“No, sir, nor never has done. You see, her mother
(who died when she was a year and two months old) was subject to
very bad fits, and as she had never mentioned to me that she
was subject to fits, they couldn’t be guarded
against. Consequently, she dropped the baby when took, and
this happened.”
“It was very wrong of her,” said Barbox Brothers,
with a knitted brow, “to marry you, making a secret of her
infirmity.”
“Well, sir,” pleaded Lamps, in behalf of the
long-deceased. “You see, Phœbe and me, we have
talked that over too. And Lord bless us! Such a
number on us has our infirmities, what with
fits, and what with misfits, of one sort and another, that if we
confessed to ’em all before we got married, most of us
might never get married.”
“Might not that be for the better?”
“Not in this case, sir,” said Phœbe, giving
her hand to her father.
“No, not in this case, sir,” said her father,
patting it between his own.
“You correct me,” returned Barbox Brothers, with a
blush; “and I must look so like a Brute, that at all events
it would be superfluous in me to confess to that
infirmity. I wish you would tell me a little more about
yourselves. I hardly know how to ask it of you, for I am
conscious that I have a bad stiff manner, a dull discouraging way
with me, but I wish you would.”
“With all our hearts, sir,” returned Lamps, gaily,
for both. “And first of all, that you may know my
name—”
“Stay!” interposed the visitor, with a slight
flush. “What signifies your name! Lamps is name
enough for me. I like it. It is bright and
expressive. What do I want more!”
“Why to be sure, sir,” returned Lamps.
“I have in general no other name down at the Junction; but
I thought, on account of your being here as a first-class single,
in a private character, that you might—”
The visitor waved the thought away with his hand, and
Lamps acknowledged the mark of confidence by taking another
rounder.
“You are hard-worked, I take for granted?” said
Barbox Brothers, when the subject of the rounder came out of it
much dirtier than he went into it.
Lamps was beginning, “Not particular
so”—when his daughter took him up.
“O yes, sir, he is very hard-worked. Fourteen,
fifteen, eighteen, hours a day. Sometimes twenty-four hours
at a time.”
“And you,” said Barbox Brothers, “what with
your school, Phœbe, and what with your
lace-making—”
“But my school is a pleasure to me,” she
interrupted, opening her brown eyes wider, as if surprised to
find him so obtuse. “I began it when I was but a
child, because it brought me and other children into company,
don’t you see? That was not work. I
carry it on still, because it keeps children about me.
That is not work. I do it as love, not as
work. Then my lace-pillow;” her busy hands had
stopped, as if her argument required all her cheerful
earnestness, but now went on again at the name; “it goes
with my thoughts when I think, and it goes with my tunes when I
hum any, and that’s not work. Why, you
yourself thought it was music, you know, sir. And so it is,
to me.”
“Everything is!” cried Lamps,
radiantly. “Everything is music to her,
sir.”
“My father is, at any rate,” said Phœbe,
exultingly pointing her thin forefinger at him.
“There is more music in my father than there is in a brass
band.”
“I say! My dear! It’s very
fillyillially done, you know; but you are flattering your
father,” he protested, sparkling.
“No I am not, sir, I assure you. No I am
not. If you could hear my father sing, you would know I am
not. But you never will hear him sing, because he never
sings to any one but me. However tired he is, he always
sings to me when he comes home. When I lay here long ago,
quite a poor little broken doll, he used to sing to me.
More than that, he used to make songs, bringing in whatever
little jokes we had between us. More than that, he often
does so to this day. O! I’ll tell of you, father, as
the gentleman has asked about you. He is a poet,
sir.”
“I shouldn’t wish the gentleman, my dear,”
observed Lamps, for the moment turning grave, “to carry
away that opinion of your father, because it might look as if I
was given to asking the stars in a molloncolly manner what they
was up to. Which I wouldn’t at once waste the time,
and take the liberty, my dear.”
“My father,” resumed Phœbe, amending her
text, “is always on the bright side, and the good
side. You told me just now, I had a happy
disposition. How can I help it?”
“Well! but my dear,” returned Lamps
argumentatively, “how can I help it? Put it to
yourself, sir. Look at her. Always as you see her
now. Always working—and after all, sir, for but a
very few shillings a week—always contented, always lively,
always interested in others, of all sorts. I said, this
moment, she was always as you see her now. So she is, with
a difference that comes to much the same. For, when
it’s my Sunday off and the morning bells have done ringing,
I hear the prayers and thanks read in the touchingest way, and I
have the hymns sung to me—so soft, sir, that you
couldn’t hear ’em out of this room—in notes
that seem to me, I am sure, to come from Heaven and go back to
it.”
It might have been merely through the association of these
words with their sacredly quiet time, or it might have been
through the larger association of the words with the
Redeemer’s presence beside the bedridden; but here her
dexterous fingers came to a stop on the lace-pillow, and clasped
themselves round his neck as he bent down. There was great
natural sensibility in both father and daughter, the visitor
could easily see; but each made it, for the other’s sake,
retiring, not demonstrative; and perfect cheerfulness, intuitive
or acquired, was either the first or second nature of both.
In a very few moments, Lamps was taking another rounder
with his comical features beaming, while Phœbe’s
laughing eyes (just a glistening speck or so upon their lashes)
were again directed by turns to him, and to her work, and to
Barbox Brothers.
“When my father, sir,” she said brightly,
“tells you about my being interested in other people even
though they know nothing about me—which, by-the-by, I told
you myself—you ought to know how that comes about.
That’s my father’s doing.”
“No, it isn’t!” he protested.
“Don’t you believe him, sir; yes, it is. He
tells me of everything he sees down at his work. You would
be surprised what a quantity he gets together for me every
day. He looks into the carriages, and tells me how the
ladies are drest—so that I know all the fashions! He
looks into the carriages, and tells me what pairs of lovers he
sees, and what new-married couples on their wedding trip—so
that I know all about that! He collects chance newspapers
and books—so that I have plenty to read! He tells me
about the sick people who are travelling to try to get
better—so that I know all about them! In short, as I
began by saying, he tells me everything he sees and makes out,
down at his work, and you can’t think what a quantity he
does see and make out.”
“As to collecting newspapers and books, my
dear,” said Lamps, “it’s clear I can have no
merit in that, because they’re not my perquisites.
You see, sir, it’s this way: A Guard, he’ll say to
me, ‘Hallo, here you are, Lamps. I’ve saved
this paper for your daughter. How is she agoing
on?’ A Head-Porter, he’ll say to me,
‘Here! Catch hold, Lamps. Here’s a couple
of wollumes for your daughter. Is she pretty much where she
were?’ And that’s what makes it double welcome,
you see. If she had a thousand pound in a box, they
wouldn’t trouble themselves about her; but being what she
is—that is, you understand,” Lamps added, somewhat
hurriedly, “not having a thousand pound in a box—they
take thought for her. And as concerning the young pairs,
married and unmarried, it’s only natural I should bring
home what little I can about them, seeing that
there’s not a Couple of either sort in the neighbourhood
that don’t come of their own accord to confide in
Phœbe.”
She raised her eyes triumphantly to Barbox Brothers, as she
said:
“Indeed, sir, that is true. If I could have got up
and gone to church, I don’t know how often I should have
been a bridesmaid. But if I could have done that, some
girls in love might have been jealous of me, and as it is, no
girl is jealous of me. And my pillow would not
have been half as ready to put the piece of cake under, as I
always find it,” she added, turning her face on it with a
light sigh, and a smile at her father.
The arrival of a little girl, the biggest of the scholars, now
led to an understanding on the part of Barbox Brothers, that she
was the domestic of the cottage, and had come to take active
measures in it, attended by a pail that might have extinguished
her, and a broom three times her height. He therefore rose
to take his leave, and took it; saying that if Phœbe had no
objection, he would come again.
He had muttered that he would come “in the course of his
walks.” The course of his walks must have been highly
favourable to his return, for he returned after an interval of a
single day.
“You thought you would never see me any more, I
suppose?” he said to Phœbe as he touched her hand,
and sat down by her couch.
“Why should I think so!” was her surprised
rejoinder.
“I took it for granted you would mistrust me.”
“For granted, sir? Have you been so much
mistrusted?”
“I think I am justified in answering yes. But I
may have mistrusted too, on my part. No matter
just now. We were speaking of the Junction last time.
I have passed hours there since the day before
yesterday.”
“Are you now the gentleman for Somewhere?” she
asked with a smile.
“Certainly for Somewhere; but I don’t yet know
Where. You would never guess what I am travelling
from. Shall I tell you? I am travelling from my
birthday.”
Her hands stopped in her work, and she looked at him with
incredulous astonishment.
“Yes,” said Barbox Brothers, not quite easy in his
chair, “from my birthday. I am, to myself, an
unintelligible book with the earlier chapters all torn out, and
thrown away. My childhood had no grace of childhood, my
youth had no charm of youth, and what can be expected from such a
lost beginning?” His eyes meeting hers as they were
addressed intently to him, something seemed to stir within his
breast, whispering: “Was this bed a place for the graces of
childhood and the charms of youth to take to, kindly? O
shame, shame!”
“It is a disease with me,” said Barbox Brothers,
checking himself, and making as though he had a difficulty in
swallowing something, “to go wrong about that. I
don’t know how I came to speak of that. I hope it is
because of an old misplaced confidence in one of your
sex involving an old bitter treachery. I don’t
know. I am all wrong together.”
Her hands quietly and slowly resumed their work.
Glancing at her, he saw that her eyes were thoughtfully following
them.
“I am travelling from my birthday,” he resumed,
“because it has always been a dreary day to me. My
first free birthday coming round some five or six weeks hence, I
am travelling to put its predecessors far behind me, and to try
to crush the day—or, at all events, put it out of my
sight—by heaping new objects on it.”
As he paused, she looked at him; but only shook her head as
being quite at a loss.
“This is unintelligible to your happy
disposition,” he pursued, abiding by his former phrase as
if there were some lingering virtue of self-defence in it:
“I knew it would be, and am glad it is. However, on
this travel of mine (in which I mean to pass the rest of my days,
having abandoned all thought of a fixed home), I stopped, as you
heard from your father, at the Junction here. The extent of
its ramifications quite confused me as to whither I should go,
from here. I have not yet settled, being still
perplexed among so many roads. What do you think I mean to
do? How many of the branching roads can you see from your
window?”
Looking out, full of interest, she answered,
“Seven.”
“Seven,” said Barbox Brothers, watching her with a
grave smile. “Well! I propose to myself, at once to
reduce the gross number to those very seven, and gradually to
fine them down to one—the most promising for me—and
to take that.”
“But how will you know, sir, which is the most
promising?” she asked, with her brightened eyes roving over
the view.
“Ah!” said Barbox Brothers, with another grave
smile, and considerably improving in his ease of speech.
“To be sure. In this way. Where your father can
pick up so much every day for a good purpose, I may once and
again pick up a little for an indifferent purpose. The
gentleman for Nowhere must become still better known at the
Junction. He shall continue to explore it, until he
attaches something that he has seen, heard, or found out, at the
head of each of the seven roads, to the road itself. And so
his choice of a road shall be determined by his choice among his
discoveries.”
Her hands still busy, she again glanced at the prospect, as if
it comprehended something that had not been in it before, and
laughed as if it yielded her new pleasure.
“But I must not forget,” said Barbox Brothers,
“(having got so far) to ask a favour. I
want your help in this expedient of mine. I want to bring
you what I pick up at the heads of the seven roads that you lie
here looking out at, and to compare notes with you about
it. May I? They say two heads are better than
one. I should say myself that probably depends upon the
heads concerned. But I am quite sure, though we are so
newly acquainted, that your head and your father’s have
found out better things, Phœbe, than ever mine of itself
discovered.”
She gave him her sympathetic right hand, in perfect rapture
with his proposal, and eagerly and gratefully thanked him.
“That’s well!” said Barbox Brothers.
“Again I must not forget (having got so far) to ask a
favour. Will you shut your eyes?”
Laughing playfully at the strange nature of the request, she
did so.
“Keep them shut,” said Barbox Brothers, going
softly to the door, and coming back. “You are on your
honour, mind, not to open your eyes until I tell you that you
may?”
“Yes! On my honour.”
“Good. May I take your lace-pillow from you for a
minute?”
Still laughing and wondering, she removed her hands from it,
and he put it aside.
“Tell me. Did you see the puffs of smoke and steam
made by the morning fast-train yesterday on road number seven
from here?”
“Behind the elm-trees and the spire?”
“That’s the road,” said Barbox Brothers,
directing his eyes towards it.
“Yes. I watched them melt away.”
“Anything unusual in what they expressed?”
“No!” she answered merrily.
“Not complimentary to me, for I was in that train.
I went—don’t open your eyes—to fetch you this,
from the great ingenious town. It is not half so large as
your lace-pillow, and lies easily and lightly in its place.
These little keys are like the keys of a miniature piano, and you
supply the air required with your left hand. May you pick
out delightful music from it, my dear! For the
present—you can open your eyes
now—good-bye!”
In his embarrassed way, he closed the door upon himself, and
only saw, in doing so, that she ecstatically took the present to
her bosom and caressed it. The glimpse gladdened his heart,
and yet saddened it; for so might she, if her youth had
flourished in its natural course, have taken to her breast that
day the slumbering music of her own child’s voice.