As dearly shown in the practice of an old Pennsylvania Almanac,
entitled, "Poor Richard Improved."
Courteous Reader,
I have heard that nothing gives an author so great pleasure as to find
his works respectfully quoted by others. Judge, then, how much I must
have been gratified by an incident I am going to relate to you. I
stopped my horse lately where a great number of people were collected at
an auction of merchants' goods. The hour of the sale not being come,
they were conversing on the badness of the times; and one of the company
called to a plain, clean old man, with white locks, "Pray, Father
Abraham, what think you of the times? Will not these heavy taxes quite
ruin the country? How shall we ever be able to pay them? What would you
advise us to?" Father Abraham stood up and replied, "If you would have
my advice, I will give it you in short; for A word to the wise is
enough, as Poor Richard says." They joined in desiring him to speak his
mind; and, gathering round him, he proceeded as follows:
"Friends," said he, "the taxes are indeed very heavy, and if those laid
on by the government were the only ones we had to pay, we might more
easily discharge them; but we have many others, and much more grievous
to some of us. We are taxed twice as much by our idleness, three times
as much by our pride, and four times as much by our folly; and from
these taxes the commissioners cannot ease or deliver us, by allowing an
abatement. However, let us hearken to good advice, and something may be
done for us: God helps them that help themselves, as Poor Richard
says.
"I. It would be thought a hard government that should tax its people one
tenth part of their time, to be employed in its service; but idleness
taxes many of us much more; sloth, by bringing on diseases, absolutely
shortens life. Sloth, like rust, consumes faster than labour wears;
while the used key is always bright, as Poor Richard says. But dost
thou love life, then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is
made of, as Poor Richard says. How much more than is necessary do we
spend in sleep? forgetting that The sleeping fox catches no poultry,
and that There will be sleeping enough in the grave, as Poor Richard
says.
"If time be of all things the most precious, wasting time must be, as
Poor Richard says, the greatest prodigality; since, as he elsewhere
tells us, Lost time is never found again; and what we call time enough,
always proves little enough. Let us, then, up and be doing, and doing
to the purpose; so by diligence shall we do more with less perplexity.
Sloth makes all things difficult, but industry all easy; and He that
riseth late must trot all day, and shall scarce overtake his business at
night; while Laziness travels so slowly, that Poverty soon overtakes
him. Drive thy business, let not that drive thee; and Early to bed
and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise, as Poor
Richard says.
"So what signifies wishing and hoping for better times? We may make
these times better if we bestir ourselves. Industry need not wish, and
he that lives upon hopes will die fasting. There are no gains
without pains; then help, hands, for I have no lands; or, if I have,
they are smartly taxed. He that hath a trade hath an estate; and he
that hath a calling hath an office of profit and honour, as Poor
Richard says; but then the trade must be worked at, and the calling
followed, or neither the estate nor the office will enable us to pay our
taxes. If we are industrious, we shall never starve; for, At the
workingman's house hunger looks in, but dares not enter. Nor will the
bailiff or the constable enter; for Industry pays debts, while despair
increaseth them. What though you have found no treasure, nor has any
rich relation left you a legacy? Diligence is the mother of luck, and
God gives all things to industry. Then plough deep while sluggards
sleep, and you shall have corn to sell and to keep. Work while it is
called to-day, for you know not how much you may be hindered to-morrow.
One to-day is worth two to-morrows, as Poor Richard says; and farther,
Never leave that till to-morrow which you can do to-day. If you were a
servant, would you not be ashamed that a good master should catch you
idle? Are you, then, your own master? Be ashamed to catch yourself idle
when there is so much to be done for yourself, your family, and your
country. Handle your tools without mittens; remember that The cat in
gloves catches no mice, as Poor Richard says. It is true there is much
to be done, and perhaps you are weak-handed; but stick to it steadily,
and you will see great effects; for Constant dropping wears away
stones; and By diligence and patience the mouse ate in two the cable;
and Little strokes fell great oaks.
"Methinks I hear some of you say, 'Must a man afford himself no
leisure?' I will tell thee, my friend, what Poor Richard says: Employ
thy time well, if thou meanest to gain leisure; and, since thou art not
sure of a minute, throw not away an hour. Leisure is time for doing
something useful; this leisure the diligent man will obtain, but the
lazy man never; for A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two
things. Many, without labour, would live by their wits only, but they
break for want of stock; whereas industry gives comfort, and plenty,
and respect. Fly pleasures, and they will follow you. The diligent
spinner has a large shift; and now I have a sheep and a cow, everybody
bids me good-morrow.
"II. But with our industry we must likewise be steady, settled, and
careful, and oversee our own affairs with our own eyes, and not trust
too much to others; for, as Poor Richard says,
I never saw an oft-removed tree,
Nor yet an oft-removed family,
That throve so well as those that settled be.
And again, Three removes are as bad as a fire; and again, Keep thy
shop, and thy shop will keep thee; and again, If you would have your
business done, go; if not, send. And again,
He that by the plough would thrive,
Himself must either hold or drive.
And again, The eye of a master will do more work than both his hands;
and again, Want of care does us more damage than want of knowledge;
and again, Not to oversee workmen is to leave them your purse open.
Trusting too much to others' care is the ruin of many; for in the
affairs of this world men are saved, not by faith, but by the want of
it; but a man's own care is profitable; for, If you would have a
faithful servant, and one that you like, serve yourself. A little
neglect may breed great mischief; for want of a nail the shoe was lost;
for want of a shoe the horse was lost; and for want of a horse the rider
was lost, being overtaken and slain by the enemy; all for the want of a
little care about a horseshoe nail.
"III. So much for industry, my friends, and attention to one's own
business; but to these we must add frugality, if we would make our
industry more certainly successful. A man may, if he knows not how to
save as he gets, keep his nose all his life to the grindstone, and die
not worth a groat at last. A fat kitchen makes a lean will; and
Many estates are spent in the getting,
Since women for tea forsook spinning and knitting,
And men for punch forsook hewing and splitting.
If you would be wealthy, think of saving as well as of getting. The
Indies have not made Spain rich, because her outgoes are greater than
her incomes.
"Away, then, with your expensive follies, and you will not then have so
much cause to complain of hard times, heavy taxes, and chargeable
families. And farther, What maintains one vice would bring up two
children. You may think, perhaps, that a little tea, or a little punch
now and then, diet a little more costly, clothes a little finer, and a
little entertainment now and then, can be no great matter; but remember,
Many a little makes a mickle. Beware of little expenses; A small leak
will sink a great ship, as Poor Richard says; and again, Who dainties
love, shall beggars prove; and moreover, Fools make feasts, and wise
men eat them.
"Here you are all got together at this sale of fineries and knickknacks.
You call them goods; but, if you do not take care, they will prove
evils to some of you. You expect they will be sold cheap, and perhaps
they may for less than they cost; but, if you have no occasion for them,
they must be dear to you. Remember what Poor Richard says: Buy what
thou hast no need of, and ere long thou shalt sell thy necessaries. And
again, At a great pennyworth pause a while. He means, that perhaps the
cheapness is apparent only, and not real; or the bargain, by straitening
thee in thy business, may do thee more harm than good. For in another
place he says, Many have been ruined by buying good pennyworths.
Again, It is foolish to lay out money in a purchase of repentance; and
yet this folly is practised every day at auctions, for want of minding
the Almanac. Many a one, for the sake of finery on the back, have gone
with a hungry belly, and half starved their families. Silks and satins,
scarlet and velvets, put out the kitchen fire, as Poor Richard says.
"These are not the necessaries of life; they can scarcely be called the
conveniences; and yet, only because they look pretty, how many want to
have them! By these and other extravagances, the genteel are reduced to
poverty, and forced to borrow of those whom they formerly despised, but
who, through industry and frugality, have maintained their standing; in
which case it appears plainly that A ploughman on his legs is higher
than a gentleman on his knees, as Poor Richard says. Perhaps they have
had a small estate left them, which they knew not the getting of; they
think It is day, and will never be night; that a little to be spent
out of so much is not worth minding; but Always taking out of the
mealtub and never putting in, soon comes to the bottom, as Poor Richard
says; and then, When the well is dry, they know the worth of water.
But this they might have known before if they had taken his advice. If
you would know the value of money, go and try to borrow some; for he
that goes a borrowing goes a sorrowing, as Poor Richard says; and
indeed so does he that lends to such people, when he goes to get it in
again. Poor Dick farther advises, and says,
Fond pride of dress is sure a very curse;
Ere fancy you consult, consult your purse.
And again, Pride is as loud a beggar as Want, and a great deal more
saucy. When you have bought one fine thing, you must buy ten more, that
your appearance may be all of a piece; but Poor Dick says, It is
easier to suppress the first desire than to satisfy all that follow it.
And it is as truly folly for the poor to ape the rich, as for the frog
to swell in order to equal the ox.
Vessels large may venture more,
But little boats should keep near shore.
It is, however, a folly soon punished; for, as Poor Richard says, Pride
that dines on vanity, sups on contempt. Pride breakfasted with Plenty,
dined with Poverty, and supped with Infamy. And, after all, of what use
is this pride of appearance, for which so much is risked, so much is
suffered? It cannot promote health nor ease pain; it makes no increase
of merit in the person; it creates envy; it hastens misfortune.
"But what madness must it be to run in debt for these superfluities?
We are offered, by the terms of this sale, six months' credit; and that,
perhaps, has induced some of us to attend it, because we cannot spare
the ready money, and hope now to be fine without it. But ah! think what
you do when you run in debt; you give to another power over your
liberty. If you cannot pay at the time, you will be ashamed to see your
creditor; you will be in fear when you speak to him; you will make poor,
pitiful, sneaking excuses, and, by degrees, come to lose your veracity,
and sink into base, downright lying; for The second vice is lying, the
first is running in debt, as Poor Richard says; and again, to the same
purpose, Lying rides upon Debt's back, whereas a freeborn ought not to
be ashamed nor afraid to see or speak to any man living. But poverty
often deprives a man of all spirit and virtue. It is hard for an empty
bag to stand upright.
"What would you think of that prince or of that government who should
issue an edict forbidding you to dress like a gentleman or gentlewoman,
on pain of imprisonment or servitude? Would you not say that you were
free, have a right to dress as you please, and that such an edict would
be a breach of your privileges, and such a government tyrannical? And
yet you are about to put your self under such tyranny, when you run in
debt for such dress! Your creditor has authority, at his pleasure, to
deprive you of your liberty, by confining you in jail till you shall be
able to pay him. When you have got your bargain, you may, perhaps, think
little of payment; but, as Poor Richard says, Creditors have better
memories than debtors; creditors are a superstitious sect, great
observers of set days and times. The day comes round before you are
aware, and the demand is made before you are prepared to satisfy it; or,
if you bear your debt in mind, the term, which at first seemed so long,
will, as it lessens, appear extremely short. Time will seem to have
added wings to his heels as well as his shoulders. Those have a short
Lent who owe money to be paid at Easter. At present, perhaps, you may
think yourselves in thriving circumstances, and that you can bear a
little extravagance without injury; but
For age and want save while you may;
No morning sun lasts a whole day.
Gain may be temporary and uncertain, but ever, while you live, expense
is constant and certain; and It is easier to build two chimneys than to
keep one in fuel, as Poor Richard says; so, Rather go to bed
supperless than rise in debt.
"IV. This doctrine, my friends, is reason and wisdom; but, after all, do
not depend too much upon your own industry, and frugality, and prudence,
though excellent things; for they may all be blasted, without the
blessing of Heaven; and, therefore, ask that blessing humbly, and be not
uncharitable to those that at present seem to want it, but comfort and
help them. Remember, Job suffered, and was afterward prosperous.
"And now, to conclude, Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will
learn in no other, as Poor Richard says, and scarce in that; for it is
true, We may give advice, but we cannot give conduct. However,
remember this, They that will not be counselled cannot be helped; and
farther, that, If you will not hear Reason, she will surely rap your
knuckles, as Poor Richard says."
Thus the old gentleman ended his harangue. The people heard it, and
approved the doctrine; and immediately practised the contrary, just as
if it had been a common sermon; for the auction opened, and they began
to buy extravagantly. I found the good man had thoroughly studied my
Almanacs, and digested all I had dropped on these topics during the
course of twenty-five years. The frequent mention he made of me must
have tired any one else; but my vanity was wonderfully delighted with
it, though I was conscious that not a tenth part of the wisdom was my
own which he ascribed to me, but rather the gleanings that I had made of
the sense of all ages and nations. However, I resolved to be the better
for the echo of it; and, though I had at first determined to buy stuff
for a new coat, I went away resolved to wear my old one a little longer.
Reader, if thou wilt do the same, thy profit will be as great as mine. I
am, as ever, thine to serve thee,
Richard Saunders.
The desire of happiness in general is so natural to us, that all the
world are in pursuit of it; all have this one end in view, though they
take such different methods to attain it, and are so much divided in
their notions of it.
Evil, as evil, can never be chosen; and, though evil is often the effect
of our own choice, yet we never desire it, but under the appearance of
an imaginary good.
Many things we indulge ourselves in may be considered by us as evils,
and yet be desirable; but then they are only considered as evils in
their effects and consequences, not as evils at present, and attended
with immediate misery.
Reason represents things to us not only as they are at present, but as
they are in their whole nature and tendency; passion only regards them
in the former light. When this governs us, we are regardless of the
future, and are only affected with the present. It is impossible ever to
enjoy ourselves rightly, if our conduct be not such as to preserve the
harmony and order of our faculties, and the original frame and
constitution of our minds; all true happiness, as all that is truly
beautiful, can only result from order.
While there is a conflict between the two principles of passion and
reason, we must be miserable in proportion to the struggle; and when the
victory is gained, and reason so far subdued as seldom to trouble us
with its remonstrances, the happiness we have then is not the happiness
of our rational nature, but the happiness only of the inferior and
sensual part of us, and, consequently, a very low and imperfect
happiness to what the other would have afforded us.
If we reflect upon any one passion and disposition of mind, abstract
from virtue, we shall soon see the disconnexion between that and true,
solid happiness. It is of the very essence, for instance, of envy to be
uneasy and disquieted. Pride meets with provocations and disturbances
upon almost every occasion. Covetousness is ever attended with
solicitude and anxiety. Ambition has its disappointments to sour us, but
never the good fortune to satisfy us; its appetite grows the keener by
indulgence, and all we can gratify it with at present serves but the
more to inflame its insatiable desires.
The passions, by being too much conversant with earthly objects, can
never fix in us a proper composure and acquiescence of mind. Nothing but
an indifference to the things of this world, an entire submission to the
will of Providence here, and a well-grounded expectation of happiness
hereafter, can give us a true, satisfactory enjoyment of ourselves.
Virtue is the best guard against the many unavoidable evils incident to
us; nothing better alleviates the weight of the afflictions, or gives a
truer relish of the blessings, of human life.
What is without us has not the least connexion with happiness, only so
far as the preservation of our lives and health depends upon it. Health
of body, though so far necessary that we cannot be perfectly happy
without it, is not sufficient to make us happy of itself. Happiness
springs immediately from the mind; health is but to be considered as a
condition or circumstance, without which this happiness cannot be tasted
pure and unabated.
Virtue is the best preservation of health, as it prescribes temperance,
and such a regulation of our passions as is most conducive to the
well-being of the animal economy; so that it is, at the same time, the
only true happiness of the mind, and the best means of preserving the
health of the body.
If our desires are to the things of this world, they are never to be
satisfied. If our great view is upon those of the next, the expectation
of them is an infinitely higher satisfaction than the enjoyment of those
of the present.
There is no happiness, then, but in a virtuous and self-approving
conduct. Unless our actions will bear the test of our sober judgments
and reflections upon them, they are not the actions, and, consequently,
not the happiness, of a rational being.
The following is a dialogue between Socrates, the great Athenian
philosopher, and one Glaucon, a private man, of mean abilities, but
ambitious of being chosen a senator and of governing the republic;
wherein Socrates in a pleasant manner convinces him of his incapacity
for public affairs, by making him sensible of his ignorance of the
interests of his country in their several branches, and entirely
dissuades him from any attempt of that nature. There is also added, at
the end, part of another dialogue the same Socrates had with one
Charmidas, a worthy man, but too modest, wherein he endeavours to
persuade him to put himself forward and undertake public business, as
being very capable of it. The whole is taken from Xenophon's Memorable
Things of Socrates, Book Third.
"A certain man, whose name was Glaucon, the son of Ariston, had so fixed
it in his mind to govern the republic, that he frequently presented
himself before the people to discourse of affairs of state, though all
the world laughed at him for it; nor was it in the power of his
relations or friends to dissuade him from that design. But Socrates had
a kindness for him, on account of Plato, his brother, and he only it was
who made him change his resolution. He met him, and accosted him in so
winning a manner, that he first obliged him to hearken to his discourse.
He began with him thus:
"'You have a mind, then, to govern the republic?'
"'I have so,' answered Glaucon.
"'You cannot,' replied Socrates, 'have a more noble design; for if you
can accomplish it so as to become absolute, you will be able to serve
your friends, you will raise your family, you will extend the bounds of
your country, you will be known, not only in Athens, but through all
Greece, and perhaps your renown will fly even to the barbarous nations,
as did that of Themistocles. In short, wherever you come, you will have
the respect and admiration of all the world.'
"These words soothed Glaucon, and won him to give ear to Socrates, who
went on in this manner: 'But it is certain, that if you desire to be
honoured, you must be useful to the state.'
"'Certainly,' said Glaucon.
"'And in the name of all the gods,' replied Socrates, 'tell me, what is
the first service that you intend to render the state?'
"Glaucon was considering what to answer, when Socrates continued: 'If
you design to make the fortune of one of your friends, you will
endeavour to make him rich, and thus, perhaps, you will make it your
business to enrich the republic?'
"'I would,' answered Glaucon.
"Socrates replied, 'Would not the way to enrich the republic be to
increase its revenue?'
"'It is very likely it would,' answered Glaucon.
"'Tell me, then, in what consists the revenue of the state, and to how
much it may amount? I presume you have particularly studied this matter,
to the end that, if anything should be lost on one hand, you might know
where to make it good on another; and that, if a fund should fail on a
sudden, you might immediately be able to settle another in its place?'
"'I protest,' answered Glaucon, 'I have never thought of this.'
"'Tell me, at least, the expenses of the republic, for no doubt you
intend to retrench the superfluous?'
"'I never thought of this either,' said Glaucon.
"'You were best, then, to put off to another time your design of
enriching the republic, which you can never be able to do while you are
ignorant both of its expenses and revenue.'
"'There is another way to enrich a state,' said Glaucon, 'of which you
take no notice; and that is, by the ruin [spoils] of its enemies.'
"'You are in the right,' answered Socrates; 'but to this end it is
necessary to be stronger than they, otherwise we shall run the hazard of
losing what we have. He, therefore, who talks of undertaking a war,
ought to know the strength on both sides, to the end that, if his party
be the stronger, he may boldly advise for war, and that, if it be the
weaker, he may dissuade the people from engaging themselves in so
dangerous an enterprise.'
"'All this is true.'
"'Tell me, then,' continued Socrates,'how strong our forces are by sea
and land, and how strong are our enemies.'
"'Indeed,' said Glaucon, 'I cannot tell you on a sudden.'
"'If you have a list of them in writing, pray show it me; I should be
glad to hear it read.'
"'I have it not yet.'
"'I see, then,' said Socrates, 'that we shall not engage in war so
soon; for the greatness of the undertaking will hinder you from maturely
weighing all the consequences of it in the beginning of your government.
But,' continued he, 'you have thought of the defence of the country; you
know what garrisons are necessary, and what are not; you know what
number of troops is sufficient in one, and not sufficient in another;
you will cause the necessary garrisons to be re-enforced, and disband
those that are useless?'
"'I should be of opinion,' said Glaucon, 'to leave none of them on foot,
because they ruin a country on pretence of defending it.'
"'But,' Socrates objected, 'if all the garrisons were taken away, there
would be nothing to hinder the first comer from carrying off what he
pleased; but how come you to know that the garrisons behave themselves
so ill? Have you been upon the place? Have you seen them?'
"'Not at all; but I suspect it to be so.'
"'When, therefore, we are certain of it,' said Socrates, 'and can speak
upon better grounds than simple conjectures, we will propose this advice
to the senate.'
"'It may be well to do so,' said Glaucon.
"'It comes into my mind, too,' continued Socrates, 'that you have never
been at the mines of silver, to examine why they bring not in so much
now as they did formerly.'
"'You say true; I have never been there.'
"'Indeed, they say the place is very unhealthy, and that may excuse
you.'
"'You rally me now,' said Glaucon.
"Socrates added, 'But I believe you have at least observed how much corn
our land produces, how long it will serve to supply our city, and how
much more we shall want for the whole year; to the end you may not be
surprised with a scarcity of bread, but may give timely orders for the
necessary provisions.'
"'There is a deal to do,' said Glaucon, 'if we must take care of all
these things.'
"'There is so,' replied Socrates; 'and it is even impossible to manage
our own families well, unless we know all that is wanting, and take care
to provide it. As you see, therefore, that our city is composed of above
ten thousand families, and it being a difficult task to watch over them
all at once, why did you not first try to retrieve your uncle's affairs,
which are running to decay? and, after having given that proof of your
industry, you might have taken a greater trust upon you. But now, when
you find yourself incapable of aiding a private man, how can you think
of behaving yourself so as to be useful to a whole people? Ought a man,
who has not strength enought to carry a hundred pound weight, to
undertake to carry a heavier burden?'
"'I would have done good service to my uncle,' said Glaucon, 'if he
would have taken my advice.'
"'How,' replied Socrates, 'have you not hitherto been able to govern the
mind of your uncle, and do you now believe yourself able to govern the
minds of all the Athenians, and his among the rest? Take heed, my dear
Glaucon, take heed lest too great a desire of power should render you
despised; consider how dangerous it is to speak and entertain ourselves
concerning things we do not understand; what a figure do those forward
and rash people make in the world who do so; and judge yourself whether
they acquire more esteem than blame, whether they are more admired than
contemned. Think, on the contrary, with how much more honour a man is
regarded who understands perfectly what he says and what he does, and
then you will confess that renown and applause have always been the
recompense of true merit, and shame the reward of ignorance and
temerity. If, therefore, you would be honoured, endeavour to be a man of
true merit; and if you enter upon the government of the republic with a
mind more sagacious than usual, I shall not wonder if you succeed in all
your designs.'"
Thus Socrates put a stop to the disorderly ambition of this man; but, on
an occasion quite contrary, he in the following manner exhorted
Charmidas to take an employment.
"He was a man of sense, and more deserving than most others in the same
post; but, as he was of a modest disposition, he constantly declined,
and made great difficulties of engaging himself in public business.
Socrates therefore addressed himself to him in this manner:
"'If you knew any man that could gain the prizes in the public games,
and by that means render himself illustrious, and acquire glory to his
country, what would you say of him if he refused to offer himself to the
combat?'
"'I would say,' answered Charmidas, 'that he was a mean-spirited,
effeminate fellow.'
"'And if a man were capable of governing a republic, of increasing its
power by his advice, and of raising himself by this means to a high
degree of honour, would you not brand him likewise with meanness of soul
if he would not present himself to be employed?'
"'Perhaps I might,' said Charmidas; 'but why do you ask me this
question?' Socrates replied, 'Because you are capable of managing the
affairs of the republic, and nevertheless you avoid doing so, though, in
quality of a citizen, you are obliged to take care of the
commonwealth. Be no longer, then, thus negligent in this matter;
consider your abilities and your duty with more attention, and let not
slip the occasions of serving the republic, and of rendering it, if
possible, more flourishing than it is. This will be a blessing whose
influence will descend not only on the other citizens, but on your best
friends and yourself.'"
Anergus was a gentleman of a good estate; he was bred to no business,
and could not contrive how to waste his hours agreeably; he had no
relish for any of the proper works of life, nor any taste at all for the
improvements of the mind; he spent, generally, ten hours of the
four-and-twenty in his bed; he dozed away two or three more on his
couch, and as many were dissolved in good liquor every evening, if he
met with company of his own humour. Five or six of the rest he sauntered
away with much indolence; the chief business of them was to contrive his
meals, and to feed his fancy beforehand with the promise of a dinner and
supper; not that he was so absolute a glutton or so entirely devoted to
his appetite, but, chiefly because he knew not how to employ his
thoughts better, he let them rove about the sustenance of his body. Thus
he had made a shift to wear off ten years since the paternal estate fell
into his hands; and yet, according to the abuse of words in our day, he
was called a man of virtue, because he was scarce ever known to be quite
drunken, nor was his nature much inclined to licentiousness.
One evening, as he was musing alone, his thoughts happened to take a
most unusual turn, for they cast a glance backward, and began to reflect
on his manner of life. He bethought himself what a number of living
beings had been made a sacrifice to support his carcass, and how much
corn and wine had been mingled with those offerings. He had not quite
lost all the arithmetic that he had learned when he was a boy, and he
set himself to compute
what he had devoured since he came to the age of
man.
"About a dozen of feathered creatures, small and great, have, one week
with another," said he, "given up their lives to prolong mine, which in
ten years amounts to at least six thousand.
"Fifty sheep have been sacrificed in a year, with half a hecatomb of
black cattle, that I might have the choicest part offered weekly upon my
table. Thus a thousand beasts out of the flock and the herd have been
slain in ten years' time to feed me, besides what the forest has
supplied me with. Many hundreds of fishes have, in all their varieties,
been robbed of life for my repast, and of the smaller fry as many
thousands.
"A measure of corn would hardly afford me fine flour enough for a
month's provision, and this arises to above six score bushels; and many
hogsheads of ale and wine, and other liquors, have passed through this
body of mine, this wretched strainer of meat and drink.
"And what have I done all this time for God or man? What a vast
profusion of good things upon a useless life and a worthless liver!
There is not the meanest creature among all these which I have devoured,
but hath answered the end of its creation better than I. It was made to
support human nature, and it hath done so. Every crab and oyster I have
ate, and every grain of corn I have devoured, hath filled up its place
in the rank of beings with more propriety and honour than I have done.
Oh shameful waste of life and time!"
In short, he carried on his moral reflections with so just and severe a
force of reason, as constrained him to change his whole course of life,
to break off his follies at once, and to apply himself to gain some
useful knowledge, when he was more than thirty years of age. He lived
many following years with the character of a worthy man and an
excellent Christian; he performed the kind offices of a good neighbour
at home, and made a shining figure as a patriot in the senate-house; he
died with a peaceful conscience, and the tears of his country were
dropped upon his tomb.
The world, that knew the whole series of his life, stood amazed at the
mighty change. They beheld him as a wonder of reformation, while he
himself confessed and adored the Divine power and mercy, which had
transformed him from a brute to a man.
But this was a single instance; and we may almost venture to write
MIRACLE upon it. Are there not numbers of both sexes among our young
gentry, in this degenerate age, whose lives thus run to utter waste,
without the least tendency to usefulness?
When I meet with persons of such a worthless character as this, it
brings to my mind some scraps of Horace:
"Nos numerus sumus, et fruges consumere nati,
. . . . . . . . . . . . Alcinoique
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . juventus,
Cui pulchrum fuit in medios dormire dies," &c.
PARAPHRASE.
There are a number of us creep
Into this world, to eat and sleep;
And know no reason why they're born,
But merely to consume the corn,
Devour the cattle, fowl, and fish,
And leave behind an empty dish.
Though crows and ravens do the same,
Unlucky birds of hateful name,
Ravens or crows might fill their places,
And swallow corn and eat carcáses,
Then, if their tombstone, when they die,
Be n't taught to flatter and to lie.
There's nothing better will be said,
Than that they've eat up all their bread,
Drunk all their drink, and gone to bed.
It is commonly asserted, that without self-denial there is no virtue,
and that the greater the self-denial the greater the virtue.
If it were said that he who cannot deny himself anything he inclines to,
though he knows it will be to his hurt, has not the virtue of resolution
or fortitude, it would be intelligible enough; but, as it stands, it
seems obscure or erroneous.
Let us consider some of the virtues singly.
If a man has no inclination to wrong people in his dealings, if he feels
no temptation to it, and, therefore, never does it, can it be said that
he is not a just man? If he is a just man, has he not the virtue of
justice?
If to a certain man idle diversions have nothing in them that is
tempting, and, therefore, he never relaxes his application to business
for their sake, is he not an industrious man? Or has he not the virtue
of industry?
I might in like manner instance in all the rest of the virtues; but, to
make the thing short, as it is certain that the more we strive against
the temptation to any vice, and practise the contrary virtue, the weaker
will that temptation be, and the stronger will be that habit, till at
length the temptation has no force or entirely vanishes; does it follow
from thence that, in our endeavours to overcome vice, we grow
continually less and less virtuous, till at length we have no virtue at
all?
If self-denial be the essence of virtue, then it follows that the man
who is naturally temperate, just, &c., is not virtuous; but that, in
order to be virtuous, he must, in spite of his natural inclination,
wrong his neighbours, and eat, and drink, &c., to excess.
But perhaps it may be said, that by the word virtue in the above
assertion is meant merit; and so it should stand thus: Without
self-denial there is no merit, and the greater the self-denial the
greater the merit.
The self-denial here meant must be when our inclinations are towards
vice, or else it would still be nonsense.
By merit is understood desert; and when we say a man merits, we mean
that he deserves praise or reward.
We do not pretend to merit anything of God, for he is above our
services; and the benefits he confers on us are the effects of his
goodness and bounty.
All our merit, then, is with regard to one another, and from one to
another.
Taking, then, the assertion as it last stands,
If a man does me a service from a natural benevolent inclination, does
he deserve less of me than another, who does me the like kindness
against his inclination?
If I have two journeymen, one naturally industrious, the other idle, but
both perform a day's work equally good, ought I to give the latter the
most wages?
Indeed, lazy workmen are commonly observed to be more extravagant in
their demands than the industrious; for, if they have not more for their
work, they cannot live as well. But though it be true to a proverb that
lazy folks take the most pains, does it follow that they deserve the
most money?
If you were to employ servants in affairs of trust, would you not bid
more for one you knew was naturally honest than for one naturally
roguish, but who has lately acted honestly? For currents, whose natural
channel is dammed up till the new course is by time worn sufficiently
deep and become natural, are apt to break their banks. If one servant is
more valuable than another, has he not more merit than the other? and
yet this is not on account of superior self-denial.
Is a patriot not praiseworthy if public spirit is natural to him?
Is a pacing-horse less valuable for being a natural pacer?
Nor, in my opinion, has any man less merit for having, in general,
natural virtuous inclinations.
The truth is, that temperance, justice, charity, &c., are virtues,
whether practised with or against our inclinations; and the man who
practises them merits our love and esteem; and self-denial is neither
good nor bad but as it is applied. He that denies a vicious inclination,
is virtuous in proportion to his resolution; but the most perfect virtue
is above all temptation; such as the virtue of the saints in heaven; and
he who does a foolish, indecent, or wicked thing, merely because it is
contrary to his inclination (like some mad enthusiasts I have read of,
who ran about naked, under the notion of taking up the cross), is not
practising the reasonable science of virtue, but is a lunatic.
Mathematics originally signified any kind of discipline or learning, but
now it is taken for that science which teaches or contemplates whatever
is capable of being numbered or measured. That part of the mathematics
which relates to numbers only, is called arithmetic; and that which
is concerned about measure in general, whether length, breadth, motion,
force, &c., is called geometry.
As to the usefulness of arithmetic, it is well known that no business,
commerce, trade, or employment whatsoever, even from the merchant to the
shopkeeper, &c., can be managed and carried on without the assistance of
numbers; for by these the trader computes the value of all sorts of
goods that he dealeth in, does his business with ease and certainty, and
informs himself how matters stand at any time with respect to men,
money, and merchandise, to profit and loss, whether he goes forward or
backward, grows richer or poorer. Neither is this science only useful to
the merchant, but is reckoned the primum mobile (or first mover) of
all mundane affairs in general, and is useful for all sorts and degrees
of men, from the highest to the lowest.
As to the usefulness of geometry, it is as certain that no curious art
or mechanic work can either be invented, improved, or performed without
its assisting principles.
It is owing to this that astronomers are put into a way of making their
observations, coming at the knowledge of the extent of the heavens, the
duration of time, the motions, magnitudes, and distances of the heavenly
bodies, their situations, positions, risings, settings, aspects, and
eclipses; also the measure of seasons, of years, and of ages.
It is by the assistance of this science that geographers present to our
view at once the magnitude and form of the whole earth, the vast extent
of the seas, the divisions of empires, kingdoms, and provinces.
It is by the help of geometry the ingenious mariner is instructed how to
guide a ship through the vast ocean, from one part of the earth to
another, the nearest and safest way, and in the shortest time.
By help of this science the architects take their just measures for the
structure of buildings, as private houses, churches, palaces, ships,
fortifications, &c.
By its help engineers conduct all their works, take the situation and
plan of towns, forts, and castles, measure their distances from one
another, and carry their measures into places that are only accessible
to the eye.
From hence also is deduced that admirable art of drawing sundials on any
place, howsoever situate, and for any part of the world, to point out
the exact time of the day, the sun's declination, altitude, amplitude,
azimuth, and other astronomical matters.
By geometry the surveyor is directed how to draw a map of any country,
to divide his lands, and to lay down and plot any piece of ground, and
thereby discover the area in acres, rods, and perches; the gauger is
instructed how to find the capacities or solid contents of all kinds of
vessels, in barrels, gallons, bushels, &c.; and the measurer is
furnished with rules for finding the areas and contents of superfices
and solids, and casting up all manner of workmanship. All these, and
many more useful arts, too many to be enumerated here, wholly depend
upon the aforesaid sciences, namely, arithmetic and geometry.
This science is descended from the infancy of the world, the inventors
of which were the first propagators of human kind, as Adam, Noah,
Abraham, Moses, and divers others.
There has not been any science so much esteemed and honoured as this of
the mathematics, nor with so much industry and vigilance become the care
of great men, and laboured in by the potentates of the world, namely,
emperors, kings, princes, &c.
Mathematical demonstrations are a logic of as much or more use than
that commonly learned at schools, serving to a just formation of the
mind, enlarging its capacity, and strengthening it so as to render the
same capable of exact reasoning, and discerning truth from falsehood in
all occurrences, even subjects not mathematical. For which reason it is
said the Egyptians, Persians, and Lacedæmonians seldom elected any new
kings but such as had some knowledge in the mathematics; imagining those
who had not men of imperfect judgments, and unfit to rule and govern.
Though Plato's censure, that those who did not understand the 117th
proposition of the 13th book of Euclid's Elements ought not to be ranked
among rational creatures, was unreasonable and unjust, yet to give a man
the character of universal learning, who is destitute of a competent
knowledge in the mathematics, is no less so.
The usefulness of some particular parts of the mathematics, in the
common affairs of human life, has rendered some knowledge of them very
necessary to a great part of mankind, and very convenient to all the
rest, that are any way conversant beyond the limits of their own
particular callings.
Those whom necessity has obliged to get their bread by manual industry,
where some degree of art is required to go along with it, and who have
had some insight into these studies, have very often found advantages
from them sufficient to reward the pains they were at in acquiring them.
And whatever may have been imputed to some other studies, under the
notion of insignificance and loss of time, yet these, I believe, never
caused repentance in any, except it was for their remissness in the
prosecution of them.
Philosophers do generally affirm that human knowledge to be most
excellent which is conversant among the most excellent things. What
science, then, can there be more noble, more excellent, more useful for
men, more admirably high and demonstrative, than this of the
mathematics?
I shall conclude with what Plato says, in the seventh book of his
Republic, with regard to the excellence and usefulness of geometry,
being to this purpose:
"Dear friend—You see, then, that mathematics are necessary, because, by
the exactness of the method, we get a habit of using our minds to the
best advantage. And it is remarkable that, all men being capable by
nature to reason and understand the sciences, the less acute, by
studying this, though useless to them in every other respect, will gain
this advantage, that their minds will be improved in reasoning aright;
for no study employs it more, nor makes it susceptible of attention so
much; and those who we find have a mind worth cultivating, ought to
apply themselves to this study."
Inscribed to Miss * * * *, being written at her request
As a great part of our life is spent in sleep, during which we have
sometimes pleasant and some times painful dreams, it becomes of some
consequence to obtain the one kind and avoid the other, for, whether
real or imaginary, pain is pain and pleasure is pleasure. If we can
sleep without dreaming, it is well that painful dreams are avoided. If,
while we sleep, we can have any pleasing dreams, it is, as the French
say, autant de gagné, so much added to the pleasure of life.
To this end it is, in the first place, necessary to be careful in
preserving health, by due exercise and great temperance; for in sickness
the imagination is disturbed, and disagreeable, sometimes terrible,
ideas are apt to present themselves. Exercise should precede meals, not
immediately follow them; the first promotes, the latter, unless
moderate, obstructs digestion. If, after exercise, we feed sparingly,
the digestion will be easy and good, the body lightsome, the temper
cheerful, and all the animal functions performed agreeably. Sleep, when
it follows, will be natural and undisturbed; while indolence, with full
feeding, occasions nightmares and horrors inexpressible; we fall from
precipices, are assaulted by wild beasts, murderers, and demons, and
experience every variety of distress. Observe, however, that the
quantities of food and exercise are relative things; those who move much
may, and, indeed, ought to, eat more; those who use little exercise
should eat little. In general, mankind, since the improvement of
cookery, eat about twice as much as nature requires. Suppers are not bad
if we have not dined; but restless nights naturally follow hearty
suppers after full dinners. Indeed, as there is a difference in
constitutions, some rest well after these meals; it costs them only a
frightful dream and an apoplexy, after which they sleep till doomsday.
Nothing is more common in the newspapers than instances of people who,
after eating a hearty supper, are found dead abed in the morning.
Another means of preserving health, to be attended to, is the having a
constant supply of fresh air in your bedchamber. It has been a great
mistake, the sleeping in rooms exactly closed, and in beds surrounded by
curtains. No outward air that may come in to you is so unwholesome as
the unchanged air, often breathed, of a close chamber. As boiling water
does not grow hotter by longer boiling, if the particles that receive
greater heat can escape, so living bodies do not putrefy if the
particles, so fast as they become putrid, can be thrown off. Nature
expels them by the pores of the skin and the lungs, and in a free, open
air they are carried off; but in a close room we receive them again and
again, though they become more and more corrupt. A number of persons
crowded into a small room thus spoil the air in a few minutes and even
render it mortal, as in the Black Hole at Calcutta. A single person is
said to spoil only a gallon of air per minute, and therefore requires a
longer time to spoil a bedchamber-full; but it is done, however, in
proportion, and many putrid disorders hence have their origin. It is
recorded of Methusalem, who, being the longest liver, may be supposed to
have best preserved his health, that he slept always in the open air;
for, when he had lived five hundred years, an angel said to him, "Arise,
Methusalem, and build thee a house, for thou shalt live yet five hundred
years longer." But Methusalem answered and said, "If I am to live but
five hundred years longer, it is not worth while to build me a house; I
will sleep in the air, as I have been used to do." Physicians, after
having for ages contended that the sick should not be indulged with
fresh air, have at length discovered that it may do them good. It is
therefore to be hoped that they may in time discover likewise that it is
not hurtful to those who are in health, and that we may then be cured of
the aerophoba, that at present distresses weak minds, and makes them
choose to be stifled and poisoned rather than leave open the window of a
bedchamber or put down the glass of a coach.
Confined air, when saturated with perspirable matter,[1] will not
receive more; and that matter must remain in our bodies and occasion
diseases; but it gives some previous notice of its being about to be
hurtful, by producing certain uneasiness, slight indeed at first, such
as with regard to the lungs is a trifling sensation, and to the pores of
the skin a kind of restlessness, which is difficult to describe, and few
that feel it know the cause of it. But we may recollect that sometimes,
on waking in the night, we have, if warmly covered, found it difficult
to get asleep again. We turn often, without finding repose in any
position. This fidgetiness (to use a vulgar expression for want of a
better) is occasioned wholly by an uneasiness in the skin, owing to the
retention of the perspirable matter, the bedclothes having received
their quantity, and, being saturated, refusing to take any more. To
become sensible of this by an experiment, let a person keep his position
in the bed, but throw off the bedclothes, and suffer fresh air to
approach the part uncovered of his body; he will then feel that part
suddenly refreshed; for the air will immediately relieve the skin, by
receiving, licking up, and carrying off, the load of perspirable matter
that incommoded it. For every portion of cool air that approaches the
warm skin, in receiving its portion of that vapour, receives therewith a
degree of heat that rarefies and renders it lighter, when it will be
pushed away, with its burden, by cooler and, therefore, heavier fresh
air, which for a moment supplies its place, and then, being likewise
changed and warmed, gives way to a succeeding quantity. This is the
order of nature, to prevent animals being infected by their own
perspiration. He will now be sensible of the difference between the part
exposed to the air and that which, remaining sunk in the bed, denies the
air access; for this part now manifests its uneasiness more distinctly
by the comparison, and the seat of the uneasiness is more plainly
perceived than when the whole surface of the body was affected by it.
Here, then, is one great and general cause of unpleasing dreams. For
when the body is uneasy, the mind will be disturbed by it, and
disagreeable ideas of various kinds will in sleep be the natural
consequences. The remedies, preventive and curative, follow:
1. By eating moderately (as before advised for health's sake), less
perspirable matter is produced in a given time; hence the bedclothes
receive it longer before they are saturated, and we may therefore sleep
longer before we are made uneasy by their refusing to receive any more.
2. By using thinner and more porous bedclothes, which will suffer the
perspirable matter more easily to pass through them, we are less
incommoded, such being longer tolerable.
3. When you are awakened by this uneasiness, and find you cannot easily
sleep again, get out of bed, beat up and turn your pillow, shake the
bedclothes well, with at least twenty shakes, then throw the bed open
and leave it to cool; in the mean while, continuing undressed, walk
about your chamber till your skin has had time to discharge its load,
which it will do sooner as the air may be drier and colder. When you
begin to feel the cold air unpleasant, then return to your bed, and you
will soon fall asleep, and your sleep will be sweet and pleasant. All
the scenes presented to your fancy will be, too, of the pleasing kind. I
am often as agreeably entertained with them as by the scenery of an
opera. If you happen to be too indolent to get out of bed, you may,
instead of it, lift up your bedclothes with one arm and leg, so as to
draw in a good deal of fresh air, and, by letting them fall, force it
out again. This, repeated twenty times, will so clear them of the
perspirable matter they have imbibed, as to permit your sleeping well
for some time afterward. But this latter method is not equal to the
former.
Those who do not love trouble, and can afford to have two beds, will
find great luxury in rising, when they wake in a hot bed, and going into
the cool one. Such shifting of beds would also be of great service to
persons ill of a fever, as it refreshes and frequently procures sleep. A
very large bed, that will admit a removal so distant from the first
situation as to be cool and sweet, may in a degree answer the same end.
One or two observations more will conclude this little piece. Care must
be taken, when you lie down, to dispose your pillow so as to suit your
manner of placing your head, and to be perfectly easy; then place your
limbs so as not to bear inconveniently hard upon one another, as, for
instance, the joints of your ancles; for, though a bad position may at
first give but little pain and be hardly noticed, yet a continuance will
render it less tolerable, and the uneasiness may come on while you are
asleep, and disturb your imagination. These are the rules of the art.
But, though they will generally prove effectual in producing the end
intended, there is a case in which the most punctual observance of them
will be totally fruitless. I need not mention the case to you, my dear
friend, but my account of the art would be imperfect without it. The
case is, when the person who desires to have pleasant dreams has not
taken care to preserve, what is necessary above all things,
A Good Conscience.
To my Friend A. B.
As you have desired it of me, I write the following hints, which have
been of service to me, and may, if observed, be so to you.
Remember that time is money. He that can earn ten shillings a day by
his labour, and goes abroad or sits idle one half of that day, though he
spends but sixpence during his diversion or idleness, ought not to
reckon that the only expense; he has really spent, or, rather, thrown
away, five shillings besides.
Remember that credit is money. If a man lets his money lie in my hands
after it is due, he gives me the interest, or so much as I can make of
it during that time. This amounts to a considerable sum where a man has
good and large credit, and makes good use of it.
Remember that money is of the prolific, generating nature. Money can
beget money, and its offspring can beget more, and so on. Five shillings
turned is six, turned again it is seven and threepence, and so on till
it becomes a hundred pounds. The more there is of it, the more it
produces every turning, so that the profits rise quicker and quicker. He
that kills a breeding-sow, destroys all her offspring to the thousandth
generation. He that murders a crown, destroys all that it might have
produced, even scores of pounds.
Remember that six pounds a year is but a groat a day. For this little
sum (which may be daily wasted either in time or expense unperceived) a
man of credit may, on his own security, have the constant possession and
use of a hundred pounds. So much in stock, briskly turned by an
industrious man, produces great advantage.
Remember this saying, The good paymaster is lord of another man's
purse. He that is known to pay punctually and exactly to the time he
promises, may at any time, and on any occasion, raise all the money his
friends can spare. This is sometimes of great use. After industry and
frugality, nothing contributes more to the raising of a young man in the
world than punctuality and justice in all his dealings; therefore never
keep borrowed money an hour beyond the time you promised, lest a
disappointment shut up your friend's purse for ever.
The most trifling actions that affect a man's credit are to be regarded.
The sound of your hammer at five in the morning or nine at night, heard
by a creditor, makes him easy six months longer; but if he sees you at a
billiard-table, or hears your voice at a tavern when you should be at
work, he sends for his money the next day; demands it, before he can
receive it, in a lump.
It shows, besides, that you are mindful of what you owe; it makes you
appear a careful as well as an honest man, and that still increases your
credit.
Beware of thinking all your own that you possess, and of living
accordingly. It is a mistake that many people who have credit fall into.
To prevent this, keep an exact account for some time both of your
expenses and your income. If you take the pains at first to mention
particulars, it will have this good effect: you will discover how
wonderfully small, trifling expenses mount up to large sums, and will
discern what might have been, and may, for the future, be saved, without
occasioning any great inconvenience.
In short, the way to wealth, if you desire it, is as plain as the way to
market. It depends chiefly on two words, industry and frugality;
that is, waste neither time nor money, but make the best use of
both. Without industry and frugality nothing will do, and with them
everything. He that gets all he can honestly, and saves all he gets
(necessary expenses excepted), will certainly become rich, if that
Being who governs the world, to whom all should look for a blessing on
their honest endeavours, doth not, in his wise providence, otherwise
determine.
An Old Tradesman.
Eat and drink such an exact quantity as the constitution of thy body
allows of, in reference to the services of the mind.
They that study much ought not to eat so much as those that work hard,
their digestion being not so good.
The exact quantity and quality being found out, is to be kept to
constantly.
Excess in all other things whatever, as well as in meat and drink, is
also to be avoided.
Youth, age, and the sick require a different quantity.
And so do those of contrary complexions; for that which is too much for
a phlegmatic man is not sufficient for a choleric.
The measure of food ought to be (as much as possibly may be) exactly
proportionable to the quality and condition of the stomach, because the
stomach digests it.
That quantity that is sufficient, the stomach can perfectly concoct and
digest, and it sufficeth the due nourishment of the body.
A greater quantity of some things may be eaten than of others, some
being of lighter digestion than others.
The difficulty lies in finding out an exact measure; but eat for
necessity, not pleasure; for lust knows not where necessity ends.
Wouldst thou enjoy a long life, a healthy body, and a vigorous mind, and
be acquainted also with the wonderful works of God, labour in the first
place to bring thy appetite to reason.
TO MADAME BRILLON, OF PASSY.
Written in 1778.
You may remember, my dear friend, that when we lately spent that happy
day in the delightful garden and sweet society of the Moulin Joly, I
stopped a little in one of our walks, and stayed some time behind the
company. We had been shown numberless skeletons of a kind of little fly,
called an ephemera, whose successive generations, we were told, were
bred and expired within the day. I happened to see a living company of
them on a leaf, who appeared to be engaged in conversation. You know I
understand all the inferior animal tongues. My too great application to
the study of them is the best excuse I can give for the little progress
I have made in your charming language. I listened, through curiosity, to
the discourse of these little creatures; but as they, in their national
vivacity, spoke three or four together, I could make but little of their
conversation. I found, however, by some broken expressions that I heard
now and then, they were disputing warmly on the merit of two foreign
musicians, one a cousin, the other a moscheto; in which dispute
they spent their time, seemingly as regardless of the shortness of life
as if they had been sure of living a month. Happy people! thought I; you
are certainly under a wise, just, and mild government, since you have no
public grievances to complain of, nor any subject of contention but the
perfections and imperfections of foreign music. I turned my head from
them to an old gray-headed one, who was single on another leaf, and
talking to himself. Being amused with his soliloquy, I put it down in
writing, in hopes it will likewise amuse her to whom I am so much
indebted for the most pleasing of all amusements, her delicious company
and heavenly harmony.
"It was," said he, "the opinion of learned philosophers of our race, who
lived and flourished long before my time, that this vast world, the
Moulin Joy, could not itself subsist more than eighteen hours; and I
think there was some foundation for that opinion, since, by the apparent
motion of the great luminary that gives life to all nature, and which in
my time has evidently declined considerably towards the ocean at the end
of our earth, it must then finish its course, be extinguished in the
waters that surround us, and leave the world in cold and darkness,
necessarily producing universal death and destruction. I have lived
seven of those hours, a great age, being no less than four hundred and
twenty minutes of time. How very few of us continue so long! I have seen
generations born, flourish, and expire! My present friends are the
children and grandchildren of the friends of my youth, who are now,
alas, no more! And I must soon follow them; for, by the course of
nature, though still in health, I cannot expect to live above seven or
eight minutes longer. What now avails all my toil and labour in amassing
honey-dew on this leaf, which I cannot live to enjoy? What the political
struggles I have been engaged in for the good of my compatriot
inhabitants of this bush, or my philosophical studies for the benefit of
our race in general! for, in politics, what can laws do without morals?
Our present race of ephemeræ will in a course of minutes become corrupt
like those of other and older bushes, and, consequently, as wretched.
And in philosophy how small our progress! Alas! art is long and life is
short! My friends would comfort me with the idea of a name they say I
shall leave behind me; and they tell me I have lived long enough to
nature and to glory. But what will fame be to an ephemera who no longer
exists? And what will become of all history in the eighteenth hour, when
the world itself, even the whole Moulin Joly, shall come to its end and
be buried in universal ruin?"
To me, after all my eager pursuits, no solid pleasures now remain but
the reflection of a long life spent in meaning well, the sensible
conversation of a few good lady ephemeræ, and now and then a kind smile
and a tune from the ever amiable Brillante.
TO MADAME BRILLON.
Passy, November 10, 1779.
* * * * * I am charmed with your description of
Paradise, and with your plan of living there; and I
approve much of your conclusion, that, in the mean
time, we should draw all the good we can from this
world. In my opinion, we might all draw more
good from it than we do, and suffer less evil, if we
would take care not to give too much for whistles
For to me it seems that most of the unhappy people
we meet with are become so by neglect of that
caution.
You ask what I mean? You love stories, and will excuse my telling one of
myself.
When I was a child of seven years old, my friends, on a holyday, filled
my pocket with coppers. I went directly to a shop where they sold toys
for children; and, being charmed with the sound of a whistle that I
met by the way in the hands of another boy, I voluntarily offered and
gave all my money for one. I then came home and went whistling all over
the house, much pleased with my whistle, but disturbing all the
family. My brothers, and sisters, and cousins, understanding the bargain
I had made, told me I had given four times as much for it as it was
worth; put me in mind of what good things I might have bought with the
rest of the money; and laughed at me so much for my folly, that I cried
with vexation; and the reflection gave me more chagrin than the
whistle gave me pleasure.
This, however, was afterward of use to me, the impression continuing on
my mind; so that often, when I was tempted to buy some unnecessary
thing, I said to myself, Don't give too much for the whistle; and I
saved my money.
As I grew up, came into the world, and observed the actions of men, I
thought I met with many, very many, who gave too much for the whistle.
When I saw one too ambitious of court favour, sacrificing his time in
attendance on levees, his repose, his liberty, his virtue, and perhaps
his friends, to attain it, I have said to myself, This man gives too
much for his whistle.
When I saw another fond of popularity, constantly employing himself in
political bustles, neglecting his own affairs, and ruining them by that
neglect, He pays, indeed, said I, too much for his whistle.
If I knew a miser, who gave up every kind of comfortable living, all
the pleasure of doing good to others, all the esteem of his
fellow-citizens, and the joys of benevolent friendship, for the sake of
accumulating wealth, Poor man, said I, you pay too much for your
whistle.
When I met with a man of pleasure, sacrificing every laudable
improvement of the mind or of his fortune to mere corporeal sensations,
and ruining his health in their pursuit, Mistaken man, said I, you
are providing pain for yourself instead of pleasure; you give too much
for your whistle.
If I see one fond of appearance, or fine clothes, fine houses, fine
furniture, fine equipages, all above his fortune, for which he contracts
debts and ends his days in prison, Alas! say I, he has paid dear,
very dear, for his whistle.
When I see a beautiful, sweet-tempered girl married to an ill-natured
brute of a husband, What a pity, say I, that she should pay so much
for a whistle!
In short, I conceive that great part of the miseries of mankind are
brought upon them by the false estimates they have made of the value of
things, and by their giving too much for their whistles.
Yet I ought to have charity for these unhappy people, when I consider
that, with all this wisdom of which I am boasting, there are certain
things in the world so tempting, for example, the apples of King John,
which, happily, are not to be bought; for if they were put to sale by
auction, I might very easily be led to ruin myself in the purchase, and
find that I had once more given too much for the whistle.
Adieu, my dear friend, and believe me ever yours very sincerely and with
unalterable affection,
B. Franklin.
It is wonderful how preposterously the affairs of this world are
managed. Naturally one would imagine that the interest of a few
individuals should give way to general interest; but individuals manage
their affairs with so much more application, industry, and address than
the public do theirs, that general interest most commonly gives way to
particular. We assemble parliaments and councils to have the benefit of
their collected wisdom; but we necessarily have, at the same time, the
inconvenience of their collected passions, prejudices, and private
interests. By the help of these, artful men overpower their wisdom and
dupe its possessors: and if we may judge by the acts, arrêts, and
edicts, all the world over, for regulating commerce, an assembly of
great men is the greatest fool upon earth.
I have not yet, indeed, thought of a remedy for luxury. I am not sure
that in a great state it is capable of a remedy, nor that the evil is in
itself always so great as it is represented. Suppose we include in the
definition of luxury all unnecessary expense, and then let us consider
whether laws to prevent such expense are possible to be executed in a
great country, and whether, if they could be executed, our people
generally would be happier, or even richer. Is not the hope of being one
day able to purchase and enjoy luxuries a great spur to labour and
industry! May not luxury, therefore, produce more than it consumes, if
without such a spur people would be, as they are naturally enough
inclined to be, lazy and indolent? To this purpose I remember a
circumstance. The skipper of a shallop, employed between Cape May and
Philadelphia, had done us some small service, for which he refused to be
paid. My wife, understanding that he had a daughter, sent her a
new-fashioned cap. Three years after, this skipper being at my house
with an old farmer of Cape May, his passenger, he mentioned the cap, and
how much his daughter had been pleased with it. "But," said he, "it
proved a dear cap to our congregation." "How so?" "When my daughter
appeared with it at meeting, it was so much admired that all the girls
resolved to get such caps from Philadelphia; and my wife and I computed
that the whole could not have cost less than a hundred pounds." "True,"
said the farmer, "but you do not tell all the story. I think the cap
was, nevertheless, an advantage to us, for it was the first thing that
put our girls upon knitting worsted mittens for sale at Philadelphia,
that they might have wherewithal to buy caps and ribands there; and you
know that that industry has continued, and is likely to continue, and
increase to a much greater value, and answer better purposes." Upon the
whole, I was more reconciled to this little piece of luxury, since not
only the girls were made happier by having fine caps, but the
Philadelphians by the supply of warm mittens.
In our commercial towns upon the seacoast fortunes will occasionally be
made. Some of those who grow rich will be prudent, live within bounds,
and preserve what they have gained for their posterity; others, fond of
showing their wealth, will be extravagant and ruin themselves. Laws
cannot prevent this; and perhaps it is not always an evil to the public.
A shilling spent idly by a fool may be picked up by a wiser person, who
knows better what to do with it. It is, therefore, not lost. A vain,
silly fellow builds a fine house, furnishes it richly, lives in it
expensively, and in a few years ruins himself; but the masons,
carpenters, smiths, and other honest tradesmen have been by his employ
assisted in maintaining and raising their families; the farmer has been
paid for his labour, and encouraged, and the estate is now in better
hands. In some cases, indeed, certain modes of luxury may be a public
evil, in the same manner as it is a private one. If there be a nation,
for instance, that exports its beef and linen to pay for the importation
of claret and porter, while a great part of its people live upon
potatoes and wear no shirts, wherein does it differ from the sot, who
lets his family starve and sells his clothes to buy drink? Our American
commerce is, I confess, a little in this way. We sell our victuals to
the Islands for rum and sugar; the substantial necessaries of life for
superfluities. But we have plenty, and live well, nevertheless, though,
by being soberer, we might be richer.
The vast quantity of forest-land we have yet to clear and put in order
for cultivation, will for a long time keep the body of our nation
laborious and frugal. Forming an opinion of our people and their manners
by what is seen among the inhabitants of the seaports, is judging from
an improper sample. The people of the trading towns may be rich and
luxurious, while the country possesses all the virtues that tend to
promote happiness and public prosperity. Those towns are not much
regarded by the country; they are hardly considered as an essential part
of the states; and the experience of the last war has shown, that their
being in possession of the enemy did not necessarily draw on the
subjection of the country, which bravely continued to maintain its
freedom and independence notwithstanding.
It has been computed by some political arithmetician, that if every man
and woman would work for four hours every day on something useful, that
labour would produce sufficient to procure all the necessaries of life,
want and misery would be banished out of the world, and the rest of the
twenty-four hours might be leisure and pleasure.
What occasions, then, so much want and misery? It is the employment of
men and women in works that produce neither the necessaries nor
conveniences of life; who, with those who do nothing, consume
necessaries raised by the laborious. To explain this.
The first elements of wealth are obtained by labour, from the earth and
waters. I have land and raise corn. With this, if I feed a family that
does nothing, my corn will be consumed, and at the end of the year I
shall be no richer than I was at the beginning. But if, while I feed
them, I employ them, some in spinning, others in making bricks, &c., for
building, the value of my corn will be arrested and remain with me, and
at the end of the year we may all be better clothed and better lodged.
And if, instead of employing a man I feed in making bricks, I employ him
in fiddling for me, the corn he eats is gone, and no part of his
manufacture remains to augment the wealth and convenience of the family;
I shall, therefore, be the poorer for this fiddling man, unless the rest
of my family work more or eat less, to make up the deficiency he
occasions.
Look round the world and see the millions employed in doing nothing, or
in something that amounts to nothing, when the necessaries and
conveniences of life are in question. What is the bulk of commerce, for
which we fight and destroy each other, but the toil of millions for
superfluities, to the great hazard and loss of many lives by the
constant dangers of the sea? How much labour is spent in building and
fitting great ships to go to China and Arabia for tea and coffee, to the
West Indies for sugar, to America for tobacco? These things can not be
called the necessaries of life, for our ancestors lived very comfortably
without them.
A question may be asked. Could all these people, now employed in
raising, making, or carrying superfluities, be subsisted by raising
necessaries? I think they might. The world is large, and a great part of
it still uncultivated. Many hundred millions of acres in Asia, Africa,
and America are still in a forest, and a great deal even in Europe. On a
hundred acres of this forest a man might become a substantial farmer;
and a hundred thousand men, employed in clearing each his hundred acres,
would hardly brighten a spot big enough to be visible from the moon,
unless with Herschel's telescope; so vast are the regions still in wood.
It is, however, some comfort to reflect, that, upon the whole, the
quantity of industry and prudence among mankind exceeds the quantity of
idleness and folly. Hence the increase of good buildings, farms
cultivated, and populous cities filled with wealth, all over Europe,
which a few ages since were only to be found on the coast of the
Mediterranean; and this, notwithstanding the mad wars continually
raging, by which are often destroyed in one year the works of many
years' peace. So that we may hope the luxury of a few merchants on the
coast will not be the ruin of America.
One reflection more, and I will end this long, rambling letter. Almost
all the parts of our bodies require some expense. The feet demand shoes;
the legs stockings; and the rest of the body clothing; and the belly a
good deal of victuals. Our eyes, though exceedingly useful, ask, when
reasonable, only the cheap assistance of spectacles, which could not
much impair our finances. But the eyes of other people are the eyes that
ruin us. If all but myself were blind, I should want neither fine
clothes, fine houses, nor fine furniture.
Veritas luce clarior.[3]
A friend of mine was the other day cheapening some trifles at a
shopkeeper's, and after a few words they agreed on a price. At the tying
up of the parcels he had purchased, the mistress of the shop told him
that people were growing very hard, for she actually lost by everything
she sold. How, then, is it possible, said my friend, that you can keep
on your business? Indeed, sir, answered she, I must of necessity shut my
doors, had I not a very great trade. The reason, said my friend (with a
sneer), is admirable.
There are a great many retailers who falsely imagine that being
historical (the modern phrase for lying) is much for their advantage;
and some of them have a saying, that it is a pity lying is a sin, it is
so useful in trade; though if they would examine into the reason why a
number of shopkeepers raise considerable estates, while others who have
set out with better fortunes have become bankrupts, they would find that
the former made up with truth, diligence, and probity, what they were
deficient of in stock; while the latter have been found guilty of
imposing on such customers as they found had no skill in the quality of
their goods.
The former character raises a credit which supplies the want of fortune,
and their fair dealing brings them customers; whereas none will return
to buy of him by whom he has been once imposed upon. If people in trade
would judge rightly, we might buy blindfolded, and they would save, both
to themselves and customers, the unpleasantness of haggling.
Though there are numbers of shopkeepers who scorn the mean vice of
lying, and whose word may very safely be relied on, yet there are too
many who will endeavour, and backing their falsities with asseverations,
pawn their salvation to raise their prices.
As example works more than precept, and my sole view being the good and
interest of my countrymen, whom I could wish to see without any vice or
folly, I shall offer an example of the veneration bestowed on truth and
abhorrence of falsehood among the ancients.
Augustus, triumphing over Mark Antony and Cleopatra, among other
captives who accompanied them, brought to Rome a priest of about sixty
years old; the senate being informed that this man had never been
detected in a falsehood, and was believed never to have told a lie, not
only restored him to liberty, but made him a high priest, and caused a
statue to be erected to his honour. The priest thus honoured was an
Egyptian, and an enemy to Rome, but his virtue removed all obstacles.
Pamphilius was a Roman citizen, whose body upon his death was forbidden
sepulture, his estate was confiscated, his house razed, and his wife and
children banished the Roman territories, wholly for his having been a
notorious and inveterate liar.
Could there be greater demonstrations of respect for truth than these of
the Romans, who elevated an enemy to the greatest honours, and exposed
the family of a citizen to the greatest contumely?
There can be no excuse for lying, neither is there anything equally
despicable and dangerous as a liar, no man being safe who associates
with him; for he who will lie will swear to it, says the proverb; and
such a one may endanger my life, turn my family out of doors, and ruin
my reputation, whenever he shall find it his interest; and if a man will
lie and swear to it in his shop to obtain a trifle, why should we doubt
his doing so when he may hope to make a fortune by his perjury? The
crime is in itself so mean, that to call a man a liar is esteemed
everywhere an affront not to be forgiven.
If any have lenity enough to allow the dealers an excuse for this bad
practice, I believe they will allow none for the gentleman who is
addicted to this vice; and must look upon him with contempt. That the
world does so, is visible by the derision with which his name is treated
whenever it is mentioned.
The philosopher Epimenides gave the Rhodians this description of Truth.
She is the companion of the gods, the joy of heaven, the light of the
earth, the pedestal of justice, and the basis of good policy.
Eschines told the same people, that truth was a virtue without which
force was enfeebled, justice corrupted; humility became dissimulation,
patience intolerable, chastity a dissembler, liberty lost, and pity
superfluous.
Pharmanes the philosopher told the Romans that truth was the centre on
which all things rested: a chart to sail by, a remedy for all evils, and
a light to the whole world.
Anaxarchus, speaking of truth, said it was health incapable of sickness,
life not subject to death, an elixir that healeth all, a sun not to be
obscured, a moon without eclipse, an herb which never withereth, a gate
that is never closed, and a path which never fatigues the traveller.
But if we are blind to the beauties of truth, it is astonishing that we
should not open our eyes to the inconvenience of falsity. A man given to
romance must be always on his guard, for fear of contradicting and
exposing himself to derision; for the most historical would avoid the
odious character, though it is impossible, with the utmost
circumspection, to travel long on this route without detection, and
shame and confusion follow. Whereas he who is a votary of truth never
hesitates for an answer, has never to rack his invention to make the
sequel quadrate with the beginning of his story, nor obliged to burden
his memory with minute circumstances, since truth speaks easily what it
recollects, and repeats openly and frequently without varying facts,
which liars cannot always do, even though gifted with a good memory.
Written Anno 1736.
The use of money is all the advantage there is in having money.
For six pounds a year you may have the use of one hundred pounds,
provided you are a man of known prudence and honesty.
He that spends a groat a day idly, spends idly above six pounds a year,
which is the price for the use of one hundred pounds.
He that wastes idly a groat's worth of his time per day, one day with
another, wastes the privilege of using one hundred pounds each day.
He that idly loses five shillings' worth of time, loses five shillings,
and might as prudently throw five shillings into the sea.
He that loses five shillings, not only loses that sum, but all the
advantage that might be made by turning it in dealing, which, by the
time that a young man becomes old, will amount to a considerable sum of
money.
Again: he that sells upon credit, asks a price for what he sells
equivalent to the principal and interest of his money for the time he
is to be kept out of it; therefore, he that buys upon credit pays
interest for what he buys, and he that pays ready money might let that
money out to use: so that he that possesses anything he bought, pays
interest for the use of it.
Yet, in buying goods, it is best to pay ready money, because he that
sells upon credit expects to lose five per cent. by bad debts; therefore
he charges, on all he sells upon credit, an advance that shall make up
that deficiency.
Those who pay for what they buy upon credit, pay their share of this
advance.
He that pays ready money escapes, or may escape, that charge.
A penny saved is twopence clear,
A pin a day's a groat a year.
At this time, when the general complaint is that "money is scarce," it
will be an act of kindness to inform the moneyless how they may
re-enforce their pockets. I will acquaint them with the true secret of
money-catching, the certain way to fill empty purses, and how to keep
them always full. Two simple rules, well observed, will do the business.
First, let honesty and industry be thy constant companions; and,
Secondly, spend one penny less than thy clear gains.
Then shall thy hidebound pocket soon begin to thrive, and will never
again cry with the empty bellyache: neither will creditors insult thee,
nor want oppress, nor hunger bite, nor nakedness freeze thee. The whole
hemisphere will shine brighter, and pleasure spring up in every corner
of thy heart. Now, therefore, embrace these rules and be happy. Banish
the bleak winds of sorrow from thy mind and live independent. Then shalt
thou be a man and not hide thy face at the approach of the rich nor
suffer the pain of feeling little when the sons of fortune walk at thy
right hand: for independence, whether with little or much, is good
fortune and placeth thee on even ground with the proudest of the golden
fleece. Oh, then, be wise, and let industry walk with thee in the
morning, and attend thee until thou reachest the evening hour for rest.
Let honesty be as the breath of thy soul, and never forget to have a
penny when all thy expenses are enumerated and paid: then shalt thou
reach the point of happiness, and independence shall be thy shield and
buckler, thy helmet and crown; then shall thy soul walk upright, nor
stoop to the silken wretch because he hath riches, nor pocket an abuse
because the hand which offers it wears a ring set with diamonds.
There are two sorts of people in the world, who, with equal degrees of
health and wealth, and the other comforts of life, become, the one happy
and the other miserable. This arises very much from the different views
in which they consider things, persons, and events, and the effect of
those different views upon their own minds.
In whatever situation men can be placed, they may find conveniences and
inconveniences; in whatever company, they may find persons and
conversation more or less pleasing; at whatever table, they may meet
with meats and drinks of better and worse taste, dishes better and worse
dressed; in whatever climate, they will find good and bad weather; under
whatever government, they may find good and bad laws, and good and bad
administration of those laws; in whatever poem or work of genius, they
may see faults and beauties; in almost every face and every person, they
may discover fine features and defects, good and bad qualities.
Under these circumstances, the two sorts of people above mentioned fix
their attention, those who are disposed to be happy on the conveniences
of things, the pleasant parts of conversation, the well-dressed dishes,
the goodness of the wines, the fine weather, &c., and enjoy all with
cheerfulness. Those who are to be unhappy, think and speak only of the
contraries. Hence they are continually discontented themselves, and by
their remarks sour the pleasures of society, offend personally many
people, and make themselves everywhere disagreeable. If this turn of
mind was founded in nature, such unhappy persons would be the more to be
pitied. But as the disposition to criticise and to be disgusted is,
perhaps, taken up originally by imitation, and is, unawares, grown into
a habit, which, though at present strong, may nevertheless be cured;
when those who have it are convinced of its bad effects on their
felicity, I hope this little admonition may be of service to them, and
put them on changing a habit which, though in the exercise it is chiefly
an act of imagination, yet has serious consequences in life, as it
brings on real griefs and misfortunes. For, as many are offended by, and
nobody loves this sort of people, no one shows them more than the most
common civility and respect, and scarcely that; and this frequently puts
them out of humour, and draws them into disputes and contentions. If
they aim at obtaining some advantage in rank or fortune, nobody wishes
them success, or will stir a step or speak a word to favour their
pretensions. If they incur public censure or disgrace, no one will
defend or excuse, and many join to aggravate their misconduct, and
render them completely odious. If these people will not change this bad
habit, and condescend to be pleased with what is pleasing, without
fretting themselves and others about the contraries, it is good for
others to avoid an acquaintance with them, which is always disagreeable,
and sometimes very inconvenient, especially when one finds one's self
entangled in their quarrels.
An old philosophical friend of mine was grown, from experience, very
cautious in this particular, and carefully avoided any intimacy with
such people. He had, like other philosophers, a thermometer to show him
the heat of the weather, and a barometer to mark when it was likely to
prove good or bad; but there being no instrument invented to discover,
at first sight, this unpleasing disposition in a person, he for that
purpose made use of his legs; one of which was remarkably handsome, the
other, by some accident, crooked and deformed. If a stranger, at the
first interview, regarded his ugly leg more than his handsome one, he
doubted him. If he spoke of it, and took no notice of the handsome leg,
that was sufficient to determine my philosopher to have no farther
acquaintance with him. Everybody has not this two-legged instrument; but
every one, with a little attention, may observe signs of that carping,
fault-finding disposition, and take the same resolution of avoiding the
acquaintance of those infected with it. I therefore advise those
critical, querulous, discontented, unhappy people, that, if they wish to
be respected and beloved by others and happy in themselves, they should
leave off looking at the ugly leg.
Mr. Franklin, Meeting with the following curious little piece the other
day, I send it to you to republish, as it is now in very few hands.
There is something so elegant in the imagination, conveyed in so
delicate a style, and accompanied with a moral so just and elevated,
that it must yield great pleasure and instruction to every mind of real
taste and virtue.
Cicero, in the first of his Tusculan questions, finely exposes the
vain judgment we are apt to form of human life compared with eternity.
In illustrating this argument, he quotes a passage of natural history
from Aristotle, concerning a species of insects on the banks of the
river Hypanis, that never outlive the day in which they are born.
To pursue the thought of this elegant writer, let us suppose one of the
most robust of these Hypanians, so famed in history, was in a manner
coeval with time itself; that he began to exist at break of day, and
that, from the uncommon strength of his constitution, he has been able
to show himself active in life, through the numberless minutes of ten or
twelve hours. Through so long a series of seconds, he must have acquired
vast wisdom in his way, from observation and experience.
He looks upon his fellow-creatures who died about noon to be happily
delivered from the many inconveniences of old age; and can, perhaps,
recount to his great grandson a surprising tradition of actions before
any records of their nation were extant. The young swarm of Hypanians,
who may be advanced one hour in life, approach his person with respect,
and listen to his improving discourse. Everything he says will seem
wonderful to their short lived generation. The compass of a day will be
esteemed the whole duration of time; and the first dawn of light will,
in their chronology, be styled the great era of their creation.
Let us now suppose this venerable insect, this Nestor of Hypania,
should, a little before his death, and about sunset, send for all his
descendants, his friends and his acquaintances, out of the desire he may
have to impart his last thoughts to them, and to admonish them with his
departing breath. They meet, perhaps, under the spacious shelter of a
mushroom, and the dying sage addresses himself to them after the
following manner:
"Friends and fellow-citizens! I perceive the longest life must, however,
end: the period of mine is now at hand; neither do I repine at my fate,
since my great age has become a burden to me, and there is nothing new
to me under the sun: the changes and revolutions I have seen in my
country, the manifold private misfortunes to which we are all liable,
the fatal diseases incident to our race, have abundantly taught me this
lesson, that no happiness can be secure and lasting which is placed in
things that are out of our power. Great is the uncertainty of life! A
whole brood of our infants have perished in a moment by a keen blast!
Shoals of our straggling youth have been swept into the ocean by an
unexpected breeze! What wasteful desolation have we not suffered from
the deluge of a sudden shower! Our strongest holds are not proof against
a storm of hail, and even a dark cloud damps the very stoutest heart.
"I have lived in the first ages, and conversed with insects of a larger
size and stronger make, and, I must add, of greater virtue than any can
boast of in the present generation. I must conjure you to give yet
further credit to my latest words, when I assure you that yonder sun,
which now appears westward, beyond the water, and seems not to be far
distant from the earth, in my remembrance stood in the middle of the
sky, and shot his beams directly down upon us. The world was much more
enlightened in those ages, and the air much warmer. Think it not dotage
in me if I affirm that glorious being moves: I saw his first setting out
in the east, and I began my race of life near the time when he began his
immense career. He has for several ages advanced along the sky with vast
heat and unparalleled brightness; but now, by his declination and a
sensible decay, more especially of late, in his vigour, I foresee that
all nature must fall in a little time, and that the creation will lie
buried in darkness in less than a century of minutes.
"Alas! my friends, how did I once flatter myself with the hopes of
abiding here forever! how magnificent are the cells which I hollowed out
for myself! what confidence did I repose in the firmness and spring of
my joints, and in the strength of my pinions! But I have lived long
enough to nature, and even to glory. Neither will any of you, whom I
leave behind, have equal satisfaction in life, in the dark declining age
which I see is already begun."
Thus far this agreeable unknown writer—too agreeable, we may hope, to
remain always concealed. The fine allusion to the character of Julius
Cæsar, whose words he has put into the mouth of this illustrious son of
Hypanis, is perfectly just and beautiful, and aptly points out the
moral of this inimitable piece, the design of which would have been
quite perverted, had a virtuous character, a Cato or a Cicero, been
made choice of to have been turned into ridicule. Had this life of a
day been represented as employed in the exercise of virtue, it would
have an equal dignity with a life of any limited duration, and,
according to the exalted sentiments of Tully, would have been preferable
to an immortality filled with all the pleasures of sense, if void of
those of a higher kind: but as the views of this vainglorious insect
were confined within the narrow circle of his own existence, as he only
boasts the magnificent cells he has built and the length of happiness he
has enjoyed, he is the proper emblem of all such insects of the human
race, whose ambition does not extend beyond the like narrow limits; and
notwithstanding the splendour they appear in at present, they will no
more deserve the regard of posterity than the butterflies of the last
spring. In vain has history been taken up in describing the numerous
swarms of this mischievous species which has infested the earth in the
successive ages: now it is worth the inquiry of the virtuous, whether
the Rhine or the Adige may not, perhaps, swarm with them at present,
as much as the banks of the Hypanis; or whether that silver rivulet,
the Thames, may not show a specious molehill, covered with inhabitants
of the like dignity and importance. The busy race of beings attached to
these fleeting enjoyments are indeed all of them engaged in the pursuit
of happiness, and it is owing to their imperfect notions of it that they
stop so far short in their pursuit. The present prospect of pleasure
seems to bound their views, and the more distant scenes of happiness,
when what they now propose shall be attained, do not strike their
imagination. It is a great stupidity or thoughtlessness not to perceive
that the happiness of rational creatures is inseparably connected with
immortality. Creatures only endowed with sensation may in a low sense be
reputed happy, so long as their sensations are pleasing; and if these
pleasing sensations are commensurate with the time of their existence,
this measure of happiness is complete. But such beings as are endowed
with thought and reflection cannot be made happy by any limited term
of happiness, how great soever its duration may be. The more exquisite
and more valuable their enjoyments are, the more painful must be the
thought that they are to have an end; and this pain of expectation must
be continually increasing, the nearer the end approaches. And if these
beings are themselves immortal, and yet insecure of the continuance of
their happiness, the case is far worse, since an eternal void of
delight, if not to say a state of misery, must succeed. It would be here
of no moment, whether the time of their happiness were measured by
days or hours, by months or years, or by periods of the most
immeasurable length: these swiftly-flowing streams bear no proportion to
that ocean of infinity where they must finish their course. The longest
duration of finite happiness avails nothing when it is past: nor can the
memory of it have any other effect than to renew a perpetual pining
after pleasures never to return; and since virtue is the only pledge and
security of a happy immortality, the folly of sacrificing it to any
temporal advantage, how important soever they may appear, must be
infinitely great, and cannot but leave behind it an eternal regret.
Sir,—There are many people that would be thought, and even think
themselves, honest men, who fail nevertheless in particular points of
honesty; deviating from that character sometimes by the prevalence of
mode or custom, and sometimes through mere inattention, so that their
honesty is partial only, and not general or universal. Thus one who
would scorn to overreach you in a bargain, shall make no scruple of
tricking you a little now and then at cards: another, that plays with
the utmost fairness, shall with great freedom cheat you in the sale of
a horse. But there is no kind of dishonesty into which otherwise good
people more easily and frequently fall, than that of defrauding
government of its revenues by smuggling when they have an opportunity,
or encouraging smugglers by buying their goods.
I fell into these reflections the other day, on hearing two gentlemen of
reputation discoursing about a small estate, which one of them was
inclined to sell and the other to buy; when the seller, in recommending
the place, remarked, that its situation was very advantageous on this
account, that, being on the seacoast in a smuggling country, one had
frequent opportunities of buying many of the expensive articles used in
a family (such as tea, coffee, chocolate, brandy, wines, cambrics,
Brussels laces, French silks, and all kinds of India goods) 20, 30, and,
in some articles, 50 per cent. cheaper than they could be had in the
more interior parts, of traders that paid duty. The other honest
gentleman allowed this to be an advantage, but insisted that the seller,
in the advanced price he demanded on that account, rated the advantage
much above its value. And neither of them seemed to think dealing with
smugglers a practice that an honest man (provided he got his goods
cheap) had the least reason to be ashamed of.
At a time when the load of our public debt, and the heavy expense of
maintaining our fleets and armies to be ready for our defence on
occasion, makes it necessary not only to continue old taxes, but often
to look out for new ones, perhaps it may not be unuseful to state this
matter in a light that few seem to have considered it in.
The people of Great Britain, under the happy constitution of this
country, have a privilege few other countries enjoy, that of choosing
the third branch of the legislature, which branch has alone the power of
regulating their taxes. Now, whenever the government finds it necessary
for the common benefit, advantage, and safety of the nation, for the
security of our liberties, property, religion, and everything that is
dear to us, that certain sums shall be yearly raised by taxes, duties,
&c., and paid into the public treasury, thence to be dispensed by
government for those purposes, ought not every honest man freely and
willingly to pay his just proportion of this necessary expense? Can he
possibly preserve a right to that character, if by fraud, stratagem, or
contrivance, he avoids that payment in whole or in part?
What should we think of a companion who, having supped with his friends
at a tavern, and partaken equally of the joys of the evening with the
rest of us, would nevertheless contrive by some artifice to shift his
share of the reckoning upon others, in order to go off scot-free? If a
man who practised this would, when detected, be deemed and called a
scoundrel, what ought he to be called who can enjoy all the inestimable
benefits of public society, and yet, by smuggling or dealing with
smugglers, contrive to evade paying his just share of the expense, as
settled by his own representatives in parliament, and wrongfully throw
it upon his honest and, perhaps, much poorer neighbours? He will,
perhaps, be ready to tell me that he does not wrong his neighbours; he
scorns the imputation; he only cheats the king a little, who is very
able to bear it. This, however, is a mistake. The public treasure is the
treasure of the nation, to be applied to national purposes. And when a
duty is laid for a particular public and necessary purpose, if, through
smuggling, that duty falls short of raising the sum required, and other
duties must therefore be laid to make up the deficiency, all the
additional sum laid by the new duties and paid by other people, though
it should amount to no more than a halfpenny or a farthing per head, is
so much actually picked out of the pockets of those other people by the
smugglers and their abettors and encouragers. Are they, then, any better
or other than pickpockets? and what mean, low, rascally pickpockets must
those be that can pick pockets for halfpence and for farthings?
I would not, however, be supposed to allow, in what I have just said,
that cheating the king is a less offence against honesty than cheating
the public. The king and the public, in this case, are different names
for the same thing; but if we consider the king distinctly it will not
lessen the crime: it is no justification of a robbery, that the person
robbed was rich and able to bear it. The king has as much right to
justice as the meanest of his subjects; and as he is truly the common
father of his people, those that rob him fall under the Scripture we
pronounced against the son that robbeth his father and saith it is no
sin.
Mean as this practice is, do we not daily see people of character and
fortune engaged in it for trifling advantages to themselves? Is any lady
ashamed to request of a gentleman of her acquaintance, that, when he
returns from abroad, he would smuggle her home a piece of silk or lace
from France or Flanders? Is any gentleman ashamed to undertake and
execute the commission? Not in the least. They will talk of it freely,
even before others whose pockets they are thus contriving to pick by
this piece of knavery.
Among other branches of the revenue, that of the post office is, by a
late law, appropriated to the discharge of our public debt, to defray
the expenses of the state. None but members of parliament and a few
public officers have now a right to avoid, by a frank, the payment of
postage. When any letter, not written by them or on their business, is
franked by any of them, it is a hurt to the revenue, an injury which
they must now take the pains to conceal by writing the whole
superscription themselves. And yet such is our insensibility to justice
in this particular, that nothing is more common than to see, even in a
reputable company, a very honest gentleman or lady declare his or her
intention to cheat the nation of threepence by a frank, and, without
blushing, apply to one of the very legislators themselves, with a modest
request that he would be pleased to become an accomplice in the crime
and assist in the perpetration.
There are those who, by these practices, take a great deal in a year out
of the public purse, and put the money into their own private pockets.
If, passing through a room where public treasure is deposited, a man
takes the opportunity of clandestinely pocketing and carrying off a
guinea, is he not truly and properly a thief? And if another evades
paying into the treasury a guinea he ought to pay in, and applies it to
his own use, when he knows it belongs to the public as much as that
which has been paid in, what difference is there in the nature of the
crime or the baseness of committing it?
Savages we call them, because their manners differ from ours, which we
think the perfection of civility; they think the same of theirs.
Perhaps, if we could examine the manners of different nations with
impartiality, we should find no people so rude as to be without any
rules of politeness, nor any so polite as not to have some remains of
rudeness.
The Indian men, when young, are hunters and warriors; when old,
counsellors; for all their government is by the council or advice of the
sages. There is no force, there are no prisons, no officers to compel
obedience or inflict punishment. Hence they generally study oratory, the
best speaker having the most influence. The Indian women till the
ground, dress the food, nurse and bring up the children, and preserve
and hand down to posterity the memory of public transactions. These
employments of men and women are accounted natural and honourable.
Having few artificial wants, they have abundance of leisure for
improvement by conversation. Our laborious manner of life, compared with
theirs, they esteem slavish and base; and the learning on which we value
ourselves, they regard as frivolous and useless. An instance of this
occurred at the treaty of Lancaster, in Pennsylvania, anno 1744, between
the government of Virginia and the Six Nations. After the principal
business was settled, the commissioners from Virginia acquainted the
Indians, by a speech, that there was at Williamsburgh a college, with a
fund for educating Indian youth; and that, if the chiefs of the Six
Nations would send down half a dozen of their sons to that college, the
government would take care that they should be well provided for, and
instructed in all the learning of the white people. It is one of the
Indian rules of politeness not to answer a public proposition the same
day that it is made; they think it would be treating it as a light
matter, and that they show it respect by taking time to consider it, as
of a matter important. They therefore deferred their answer till the day
following, when their speaker began by expressing their deep sense of
the kindness of the Virginia government in making them that offer; "for
we know," says he, "that you highly esteem the kind of learning taught
in those colleges, and that the maintenance of our young men, while with
you, would be very expensive to you. We are convinced, therefore, that
you mean to do us good by your proposal; and we thank you heartily. But
you, who are wise, must know that different nations have different
conceptions of things; and you will therefore not take it amiss if our
ideas of this kind of education happen not to be the same with yours. We
have had some experience of it: several of our young people were
formerly brought up at the colleges of the northern provinces; they were
instructed in all your sciences; but when they came back to us, they
were bad runners, ignorant of every means of living in the woods, unable
to bear either cold or hunger, knew neither how to build a cabin, take a
deer, nor kill an enemy, spoke our language imperfectly, were therefore
neither fit for hunters, warriors, nor counsellors; they were totally
good for nothing. We are, however, not the less obliged by your kind
offer, though we decline accepting it; and, to show our grateful sense
of it, if the gentlemen of Virginia will send us a dozen of their sons,
we will take great care of their education, instruct them in all we
know, and make men of them."
Having frequent occasions to hold public councils, they have acquired
great order and decency in conducting them. The old men sit in the
foremost ranks, the warriors in the next, and the women and children in
the hindmost. The business of the women is to take exact notice of what
passes, imprint it in their memories, for they have no writing, and
communicate it to their children. They are the records of the council,
and they preserve the tradition of the stipulations in treaties a
hundred years back; which, when we compare with our writings, we always
find exact. He that would speak, rises. The rest observe a profound
silence. When he has finished and sits down, they leave him five or six
minutes to recollect, that, if he has omitted anything he intended to
say, or has anything to add, he may rise again and deliver it. To
interrupt another, even in common conversation, is reckoned highly
indecent. How different this is from the conduct of a polite British
House of Commons, where scarce a day passes without some confusion that
makes the speaker hoarse in calling to order; and how different from
the mode of conversation in many polite companies of Europe, where, if
you do not deliver your sentence with great rapidity, you are cut off in
the middle of it by the impatient loquacity of those you converse with,
and never suffered to finish it!
The politeness of these savages in conversation is indeed carried to
excess, since it does not permit them to contradict or deny the truth of
what is asserted in their presence. By this means they indeed avoid
disputes, but then it becomes difficult to know their minds, or what
impression you make upon them. The missionaries who have attempted to
convert them to Christianity all complain of this as one of the great
difficulties of their mission. The Indians hear with patience the truths
of the gospel explained to them, and give their usual tokens of assent
and approbation: you would think they were convinced. No such matter. It
is mere civility.
A Swedish minister, having assembled the chiefs of the Susquehanna
Indians, made a sermon to them, acquainting them with the principal
historical facts on which our religion is founded; such as the fall of
our first parents by eating an apple; the coming of Christ to repair the
mischief; his miracles and sufferings, &c. When he had finished, an
Indian orator stood up to thank him. "What you have told us," says he,
"is all very good. We are much obliged by your kindness in coming so far
to tell us those things which you have heard from your mothers. In
return, I will tell you some of those we have heard from ours.
"In the beginning, our fathers had only the flesh of animals to subsist
on, and if their hunting was unsuccessful, they were starving. Two of
our young hunters, having killed a deer, made a fire in the woods to
broil some parts of it. When they were about to satisfy their hunger,
they beheld a beautiful young woman descend from the clouds, and seat
herself on that hill which you see yonder among the Blue Mountains. They
said to each other, it is a spirit that perhaps has smelt our broiling
venison, and wishes to eat of it: let us offer some to her. They
presented her with the tongue: she was pleased with the taste of it, and
said, Your kindness shall be rewarded; come to this place after thirteen
moons, and you shall find something that will be of great benefit in
nourishing you and your children to the latest generations. They did so,
and, to their surprise, found plants they had never seen before, but
which, from that ancient time, have been constantly cultivated among us,
to our great advantage. Where her right hand had touched the ground,
they found maize; where her left hand had touched it, they found
kidney-beans; and where she had sat on it, they found tobacco." The good
missionary, disgusted with this idle tale, said, "What I delivered to
you were sacred truths, but what you tell me is mere fable, fiction, and
falsehood." The Indian, offended, replied, "My brother, it seems your
friends have not done you justice in your education; they have not well
instructed you in the rules of common civility. You saw that we, who
understand and practise those rules, believed all your stories; why do
you refuse to believe ours?"
When any of them come into our towns, our people are apt to crowd around
them, gaze upon them, and incommode them where they desire to be
private; this they esteem great rudeness, and the effect of the want of
instruction in the rules of civility and good manners. "We have," say
they "as much curiosity as you; and when you come into our towns, we
wish for opportunities of looking at you; but for this purpose, we hide
ourselves behind bushes, where you are to pass, and never intrude
ourselves into your company."
Their manner of entering one another's villages has likewise its rules.
It is reckoned uncivil in travelling strangers to enter a village
abruptly, without giving notice of their approach. Therefore, as soon as
they arrive within hearing, they stop and halloo, remaining there till
invited to enter. Two old men usually come out to them and lead them in.
There is in every village a vacant dwelling called the strangers' house.
Here they are placed, while the old men go round from hut to hut,
acquainting the inhabitants that strangers are arrived, who are probably
hungry and weary; and every one sends them what he can spare of
victuals, and skins to repose on. When the strangers are refreshed,
pipes and tobacco are brought, and then, but not before, conversation
begins, with inquiries who they are, whither bound, what news, &c., and
it usually ends with offers of service if the strangers have occasion
for guides, or any necessaries for continuing their journey; and nothing
is exacted for the entertainment.
Freedom of speech is a principal pillar of a free government: when this
support is taken away, the constitution of a free society is dissolved,
and tyranny is erected on its ruins. Republics and limited monarchies
derive their strength and vigour from a popular examination into the
actions of the magistrates; this privilege, in all ages, has been, and
always will be, abused. The best of men could not escape the censure and
envy of the times they lived in. Yet this evil is not so great as it may
appear at first sight. A magistrate who sincerely aims at the good of
society will always have the inclinations of a great majority on his
side, and an impartial posterity will not fail to render him justice.
Those abuses of the freedom of speech are the exercises of liberty. They
ought to be repressed; but to whom dare we commit the care of doing it?
An evil magistrate, intrusted with power to punish for words, would be
armed with a weapon the most destructive and terrible. Under pretence of
pruning off the exuberant branches, he would be apt to destroy the tree.
It is certain that he who robs another of his moral reputation, more
richly merits a gibbet than if he had plundered him of his purse on the
highway. Augustus Cæsar, under the specious pretext of preserving the
character of the Romans from defamation, introduced the law whereby
libelling was involved in the penalties of treason against the state.
This law established his tyranny; and for one mischief which it
prevented, ten thousand evils, horrible and afflicting, sprung up in its
place. Thenceforward every person's life and fortune depended on the
vile breath of informers. The construction of words being arbitrary, and
left to the decision of the judges, no man could write or open his mouth
without being in danger of forfeiting his head.
One was put to death for inserting in his history the praises of Brutus.
Another for styling Cassius the last of the Romans. Caligula valued
himself for being a notable dancer; and to deny that he excelled in that
manly accomplishment was high treason. This emperor raised his horse,
the name of which was Incitatus, to the dignity of consul; and though
history is silent, I do not question but it was a capital crime to show
the least contempt for that high officer of state! Suppose, then, any
one had called the prime minister a stupid animal, the emperor's
council might argue that the malice of the libel was the more aggravated
by its being true, and, consequently, more likely to excite the family
of this illustrious magistrate to a breach of the peace or to acts of
revenge. Such a prosecution would to us appear ridiculous; yet, if we
may rely upon tradition, there have been formerly proconsuls in America,
though of more malicious dispositions, hardly superior in understanding
to the consul Incitatus, and who would have thought themselves
libelled to be called by their proper names.
Nero piqued himself on his fine voice and skill in music: no doubt a
laudable ambition! He performed in public, and carried the prize of
excellence. It was afterward resolved by all the judges as good law,
that whosoever would insinuate the least doubt of Nero's pre-eminence
in the noble art of fiddling ought to be deemed a traitor to the
state.
By the help of inferences and innuendoes, treasons multiplied in a
prodigious manner. Grief was treason: a lady of noble birth was put to
death for bewailing the death of her murdered son: silence was
declared an overt act to prove the treasonable purposes of the heart:
looks were construed into treason: a serene, open aspect was an evidence
that the person was pleased with the calamities that befel the emperor:
a severe, thoughtful countenance was urged against the man that wore it
as a proof of his plotting against the state: dreams were often made
capital offences. A new species of informers went about Rome,
insinuating themselves into all companies to fish out their dreams,
which the priests (oh nefarious wickedness!) interpreted into high
treason. The Romans were so terrified by this strange method of
juridical and penal process, that, far from discovering their dreams,
they durst not own that they slept. In this terrible situation, when
every one had so much cause to fear, even fear itself was made a
crime. Caligula, when he put his brother to death, gave it as a reason
to the Senate that the youth was afraid of being murdered. To be eminent
in any virtue, either civil or military, was the greatest crime a man
could be guilty of. O virtutes certissemum exitium.[4]
These were some of the effects of the Roman law against libelling: those
of the British kings that aimed at despotic power or the oppression of
the subject, continually encouraged prosecutions for words.
Henry VII., a prince mighty in politics, procured that act to be passed
whereby the jurisdiction of the Star Chamber was confirmed and extended.
Afterward Empson and Dudley, two voracious dogs of prey, under the
protection of this high court, exercised the most merciless acts of
oppression. The subjects were terrified from uttering their griefs while
they saw the thunder of the Star Chamber pointed at their heads. This
caution, however, could not prevent several dangerous tumults and
insurrections; for when the tongues of the people are restrained, they
commonly discharge their resentments by a more dangerous organ, and
break out into open acts of violence.
During the reign of Henry VIII., a high-spirited monarch! every light
expression which happened to displease him was construed by his supple
judges into a libel, and sometimes extended to high treason. When Queen
Mary, of cruel memory, ascended the throne, the Parliament, in order to
raise a fence against the violent prosecutions for words, which had
rendered the lives, liberties, and properties of all men precarious,
and, perhaps, dreading the furious persecuting spirit of this princess,
passed an act whereby it was declared, "That if a libeller doth go so
high as to libel against king or queen by denunciation, the judges shall
lay no greater fine on him than one hundred pounds, with two months'
imprisonment, and no corporeal punishment: neither was this sentence to
be passed on him except the accusation was fully proved by two
witnesses, who were to produce a certificate of their good demeanour for
the credit of their report."
This act was confirmed by another, in the seventh year of the reign of
Queen Elizabeth; only the penalties were heightened to two hundred
pounds and three months' imprisonment. Notwithstanding she rarely
punished invectives, though the malice of the papists was indefatigable
in blackening the brightest characters with the most impudent
falsehoods, she was often heard to applaud that rescript of
Theodosius. If any person spoke ill of the emperor through a foolish
rashness and inadvertence, it is to be despised; if out of madness, it
deserves pity; if from malice and aversion, it calls for mercy.
Her successor, King James I., was a prince of a quite different genius
and disposition; he used to say, that while he had the power of making
judges and bishops, he could have what law and gospel he pleased.
Accordingly, he filled those places with such as prostituted their
professions to his notions of prerogative. Among this number, and I hope
it is no discredit to the profession of the law, its great oracle, Sir
Edward Coke, appears. The Star Chamber, which in the time of Elizabeth
had gained a good repute, became an intolerable grievance in the reign
of this learned monarch.
But it did not arrive at its meridian altitude till Charles I. began to
wield the sceptre. As he had formed a design to lay aside parliaments
and subvert the popular part of the constitution, he very well knew
that the form of government could not be altered without laying a
restraint on freedom of speech and the liberty of the press: therefore
he issued his royal mandate, under the great seal of England, whereby he
commanded his subjects, under pain of his displeasure, not to prescribe
to him any time for parliaments. Lord Clarendon, upon this occasion, is
pleased to write, "That all men took themselves to be prohibited, under
the penalty of censure (the censure of the Star Chamber), which few men
cared to incur, so much as to speak of parliaments, or so much as to
mention that parliaments were again to be called."
The king's ministers, to let the nation see they were absolutely
determined to suppress all freedom of speech, caused a prosecution to be
carried on by the attorney general against three members of the House of
Commons, for words spoken in that house, Anno 1628. The members pleaded
to the information, that expressions in parliament ought only to be
examined and punished there. This notwithstanding, they were all three
condemned as disturbers of the state; one of these gentlemen, Sir John
Eliot, was fined two thousand pounds, and sentenced to lie in prison
till it was paid. His lady was denied admittance to him, even during his
sickness; consequently, his punishment comprehended an additional
sentence of divorce. This patriot, having endured many years
imprisonment, sunk under the oppression, and died in prison: this was
such a wound to the authority and rights of Parliament that, even after
the restoration, the judgment was revered by Parliament.
That Englishmen of all ranks might be effectually intimidated from
publishing their thoughts on any subject, except on the side of the
court, his majesty's ministers caused an information, for several
libels, to be exhibited in the Star Chamber against Messrs. Prynn,
Burton, and Bastwick. They were each of them fined five thousand
pounds, and adjudged to lose their ears on the pillory, to be branded on
the cheeks with hot irons, and to suffer perpetual imprisonment! Thus
these three gentlemen, each of worth and quality in their several
professions, viz., divinity, law, and physic, were, for no other offence
than writing on controverted points of church government, exposed on
public scaffolds, and stigmatized and mutilated as common signal rogues
or the most ordinary malefactors.
Such corporeal punishments, inflicted with all the circumstances of
cruelty and infamy, bound down all other gentlemen under a servile fear
of like treatment; so that, for several years, no one durst publicly
speak or write in defence of the liberties of the people; which the
king's ministers, his privy council, and his judges, had trampled under
their feet. The spirit of the administration looked hideous and
dreadful; the hate and resentment which the people conceived against it,
for a long time lay smothered in their breasts, where those passions
festered and grew venomous, and at last discharged themselves by an
armed and vindictive hand.
King Charles II. aimed at the subversion of the government, but
concealed his designs under a deep hypocrisy: a method which his
predecessor, in the beginning of his reign, scorned to make use of. The
father, who affected a high and rigid gravity, discountenanced all
barefaced immorality. The son, of a gay, luxurious disposition, openly
encouraged it: thus their inclinations being different, the restraint
laid on some authors, and the encouragement given to others, were
managed after a different manner.
In this reign a licenser was appointed for the stage and the press; no
plays were encouraged but what had a tendency to debase the minds of the
people. The original design of comedy was perverted; it appeared in all
the shocking circumstances of immodest double entendre, obscure
description, and lewd representation. Religion was sneered out of
countenance, and public spirit ridiculed as an awkward oldfashioned
virtue; the fine gentleman of the comedy, though embroidered over with
wit, was a consummate debauchee; and a fine lady, though set off with a
brilliant imagination, was an impudent coquette. Satire, which in the
hands of Horace, Juvenal, and Boileau, was pointed with a generous
resentment against vice, now became the declared foe of virtue and
innocence. As the city of London, in all ages, as well as the time we
are now speaking of, was remarkable for its opposition to arbitrary
power, the poets levelled all their artillery against the metropolis, in
order to bring the citizens into contempt: an alderman was never
introduced on the theatre but under the complicated character of a
sneaking, canting hypocrite, a miser, and a cuckold; while the
court-wits, with impunity, libelled the most valuable part of the
nation. Other writers, of a different stamp, with great learning and
gravity, endeavoured to prove to the English people that slavery was
jure divino.[5] Thus the stage and the press, under the direction of a
licenser, became battering engines against religion, virtue, and
liberty. Those who had courage enough to write in their defence, were
stigmatized as schismatics, and punished as disturbers of the
government.
But when the embargo on wit was taken off, Sir Richard Steel and Mr.
Addison soon rescued the stage from the load of impurity it laboured
under with an inimitable address, they strongly recommended to our
imitation the most amiable, rational manly characters; and this with so
much success that I cannot suppose there is any reader to-day conversant
in the writings of those gentlemen, that can taste with any tolerable
relish the comedies of the once admired Shadwell. Vice was obliged to
retire and give place to virtue: this will always be the consequence
when truth has fair play: falsehood only dreads the attack, and cries
out for auxiliaries: the truth never fears the encounter: she scorns the
aid of the secular arm, and triumphs by her natural strength.
But, to resume the description of the reign of Charles II., the doctrine
of servitude was chiefly managed by Sir Roger Lestrange. He had great
advantages in the argument, being licenser for the press, and might have
carried all before him without contradiction, if writings on the other
side of the question had not been printed by stealth. The authors,
whenever found, were prosecuted as seditious libellers; on all these
occasions the king's counsel, particularly Sawyer and Finch,
appeared most obsequious to accomplish the ends of the court.
During this blessed management, the king had entered into a secret
league with France to render himself absolute and enslave his subjects.
This fact was discovered to the world by Dr. Jonathan Swift, to whom
Sir William Temple had intrusted the publication of his works.
Sidney, the sworn foe of tyranny, was a gentleman of noble family, of
sublime understanding and exalted courage. The ministry were resolved to
remove so great an obstacle out of the way of their designs. He was
prosecuted for high treason. The overt act charged in the indictment was
a libel found in his private study. Mr. Finch, the king's own
solicitor-general, urged with great vehemence to this effect, "that the
imagining the death of the king is treason, even while that
imagination remains concealed in the mind, though the law cannot punish
such secret treasonable thoughts till it arrives at the knowledge of
them by some overt act. That the matter of the libel composed by Sidney
was an imagining how to compass the death of King Charles II.; and
the writing of it was an overt act of treason, for that to write was to
act. (Scribere est agere.)" It seems that the king's counsel in this
reign had not received the same directions as Queen Elizabeth had given
hers; she told them they were to look upon themselves as not retained so
much (pro domina regina, as pro domina veritate) for the power of
the queen as for the power of truth.
Mr. Sidney made a strong and legal defence. He insisted that all the
words in the book contained no more than general speculations on the
principles of government, free for any man to write down; especially
since the same are written in the parliament rolls and in the statute
laws.
He argued on the injustice of applying by innuendoes, general assertions
concerning principles of government, as overt acts to prove the writer
was compassing the death of the king; for then no man could write of
things done even by our ancestors, in defence of the constitution and
freedom of England, without exposing himself to capital danger.
He denied that scribere est agere, but allowed that writing and
publishing is to act (Scribere et publicare est agere), and therefore
he urged that, as his book had never been published nor imparted to any
person, it could not be an overt act, within the statutes of treasons,
even admitting that it contained treasonable positions; that, on the
contrary, it was a covert fact, locked up in his private study, as
much concealed from the knowledge of any man as if it were locked up in
the author's mind. This was the substance of Mr. Sidney's defence: but
neither law, nor reason, nor eloquence, nor innocence ever availed where
Jefferies sat as judge. Without troubling himself with any part of the
defence, he declared in a rage, that Sidney's known principles were a
sufficient proof of his intention to compass the death of the king.
A packed jury therefore found him guilty of high treason: great
applications were made for his pardon. He was executed as a traitor.
This case is a pregnant instance of the danger that attends a law for
punishing words, and of the little security the most valuable men have
for their lives, in that society where a judge, by remote inferences and
distant innuendoes, may construe the most innocent expressions into
capital crimes. Sidney, the British Brutus, the warm, the steady
friend of liberty; who, from an intrinsic love to mankind, left them
that invaluable legacy, his immortal discourses on government, was for
these very discourses murdered by the hands of lawless power. * * * *
Upon the whole, to suppress inquiries into the administration is good
policy in an arbitrary government; but a free constitution and freedom
of speech have such reciprocal dependance on each other, that they
cannot subsist without consisting together.
The following extracts of a letter, signed Columella, and addressed to
the editors of the British Repository for select Papers on Agriculture,
Arts, and Manufactures (see vol. i.), will prepare those who read it for
the following paper:
"Gentlemen,—There is now publishing in France a periodical work, called
Ephemeridis du Citoyen,[6] in which several points, interesting to those
concerned in agriculture, are from time to time discussed by some able
hands. In looking over one of the volumes of this work a few days ago, I
found a little piece written by one of our countrymen, and which our
vigilant neighbours had taken from the London Chronicle in 1766. The
author is a gentleman well known to every man of letters in Europe, and
perhaps there is none in this age to whom mankind in general are more
indebted.
"That this piece may not be lost to our own country, I beg you will give
it a place in your Repository: it was written in favour of the farmers,
when they suffered so much abuse in our public papers, and were also
plundered by the mob in many places."
To Messieurs the Public.
I am one of that class of people that feeds you all, and at present
abused by you all; in short, I am a farmer.
By your newspapers we are told that God had sent a very short harvest to
some other countries of Europe. I thought this might be in favour of Old
England, and that now we should get a good price for our grain, which
would bring millions among us, and make us flow in money: that, to be
sure, is scarce enough.
But the wisdom of government forbade the exportation.
Well, says I, then we must be content with the market price at home.
No, say my lords the mob, you sha'n't have that. Bring your corn to
market if you dare; we'll sell it for you for less money, or take it for
nothing.
Being thus attacked by both ends of the constitution, the head and
tail of government, what am I to do?
Must I keep my corn in the barn, to feed and increase the breed of rats?
Be it so; they cannot be less thankful than those I have been used to
feed.
Are we farmers the only people to be grudged the profits of our honest
labour? And why? One of the late scribblers against us gives a bill of
fare of the provisions at my daughter's wedding, and proclaims to all
the world that we had the insolence to eat beef and pudding! Has he not
read the precept in the good book, thou shall not muzzle the mouth of
the ox that treadeth out the corn; or does he think us less worthy of
good living than our oxen?
Oh, but the manufacturers! the manufacturers! they are to be favoured,
and they must have bread at a cheap rate!
Hark ye, Mr. Oaf: The farmers live splendidly, you say. And, pray, would
you have them hoard the money they get? Their fine clothes and
furniture, do they make themselves or for one another, and so keep the
money among them? Or do they employ these your darling manufacturers,
and so scatter it again all over the nation?
The wool would produce me a better price if it were suffered to go to
foreign markets; but that, Messieurs the Public, your laws will not
permit. It must be kept all at home, that our dear manufacturers may
have it the cheaper. And then, having yourselves thus lessened our
encouragement for raising sheep, you curse us for the scarcity of
mutton!
I have heard my grandfather say, that the farmers submitted to the
prohibition on the exportation of wool, being made to expect and believe
that, when the manufacturer bought his wool cheaper, they should also
have their cloth cheaper. But the deuse a bit. It has been growing
dearer and dearer from that day to this. How so? Why, truly, the cloth
is exported: and that keeps up the price.
Now if it be a good principle that the exportation of a commodity is to
be restrained, that so our people at home may have it the cheaper, stick
to that principle, and go thorough stitch with it. Prohibit the
exportation of your cloth, your leather and shoes, your ironware, and
your manufactures of all sorts, to make them all cheaper at home. And
cheap enough they will be, I will warrant you, till people leave off
making them.
Some folks seem to think they ought never to be easy till England
becomes another Lubberland, where it is fancied the streets are paved
with penny-rolls, the houses tiled with pancakes, and chickens, ready
roasted, cry, Come eat me.
I say, when you are sure you have got a good principle, stick to it and
carry it through. I hear it is said, that though it was necessary and
right for the ministry to advise a prohibition of the exportation of
corn, yet it was contrary to law; and also, that though it was
contrary to law for the mob to obstruct wagons, yet it was necessary
and right. Just the same thing to a tittle. Now they tell me an act of
indemnity ought to pass in favour of the ministry, to secure them from
the consequences of having acted illegally. If so, pass another in
favour of the mob. Others say, some of the mob ought to be hanged, by
way of example. If so—but to say no more than I have said before, when
you are sure that you have a good principle, go through with it.
You say poor labourers cannot afford to buy bread at a high price,
unless they had higher wages. Possibly. But how shall we farmers be able
to afford our labourers higher wages, if you will not allow us to get,
when we might have it, a higher price for our corn?
By all that I can learn, we should at least have had a guinea a quarter
more if the exportation had been allowed. And this money England would
have got from foreigners.
But, it seems, we farmers must take so much less that the poor may have
it so much cheaper.
This operates, then, as a tax for the maintenance of the poor. A very
good thing, you will say. But I ask, why a partial tax? why laid on us
farmers only? If it be a good thing, pray, Messieurs the Public, take
your share of it, by indemnifying us a little out of your public
treasury. In doing a good thing there is both honour and pleasure; you
are welcome to your share of both.
For my own part, I am not so well satisfied of the goodness of this
thing. I am for doing good to the poor, but I differ in opinion about
the means. I think the best way of doing good to the poor is not making
them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it. In my
youth I travelled much, and I observed in different countries that the
more public provisions were made for the poor, the less they provided
for themselves, and, of course, became poorer. And, on the contrary, the
less was done for them, the more they did for themselves, and became
richer. There is no country in the world where so many provisions are
established for them; so many hospitals to receive them when they are
sick or lame, founded and maintained by voluntary charities; so many
almshouses for the aged of both sexes, together with a solemn general
law made by the rich to subject their estates to a heavy tax for the
support of the poor. Under all these obligations, are our poor modest,
humble, and thankful? And do they use their best endeavours to maintain
themselves, and lighten our shoulders of this burden! On the contrary, I
affirm that there is no country in the world in which the poor are more
idle, dissolute, drunken, and insolent.[7] The day you passed that act
you took away from before their eyes the greatest of all inducements to
industry, frugality, and sobriety, by giving them a dependance on
somewhat else than a careful accumulation during youth and health, for
support in age or sickness. In short, you offered a premium for the
encouragement of idleness, and you should not now wonder that it has had
its effect in the increase of poverty. Repeal this law, and you will
soon see a change in their manners; Saint Monday and Saint Tuesday
will soon cease to be holydays. Six days shalt thou labour, though one
of the old commandments, long treated as out of date, will again be
looked upon as a respectable precept; industry will increase, and with
it plenty among the lower people; their circumstances will mend, and
more will be done for their happiness by inuring them to provide for
themselves, than could be done by dividing all your estates among them.
Excuse me, Messieurs the Public, if upon this interesting subject I
put you to the trouble of reading a little of my nonsense; I am sure I
have lately read a great deal of yours, and therefore, from you (at
least from those of you who are writers) I deserve a little indulgence.
I am yours, &c.
Arator.
Dear Sir,
My wish is to give you some account of the people of these new states;
but I am far from being qualified for the purpose, having as yet seen
but little more than the cities of New-York and Philadelphia. I have
discovered but few national singularities among them. Their customs and
manners are nearly the same with those of England, which they have long
been used to copy. For, previous to the revolution, the Americans were
from their infancy taught to look up to the English as patterns of
perfection in all things. I have observed, however, one custom, which,
for aught I know, is peculiar to this country. An account of it will
serve to fill up the remainder of this sheet, and may afford you some
amusement.
When a young couple are about to enter into the matrimonial state, a
never-failing article in the marriage treaty is, that the lady shall
have and enjoy the free and unmolested exercise of the rights of
whitewashing, with all its ceremonials, privileges, and appurtenances.
A young woman would forego the most advantageous connexion, and even
disappoint the warmest wish of her heart, rather than resign the
invaluable right. You would wonder what this privilege of whitewashing
is: I will endeavour to give you some idea of the ceremony, as I have
seen it performed.
There is no season of the year in which the lady may not claim her
privilege, if she pleases; but the latter end of May is most generally
fixed upon for the purpose. The attentive husband may judge by certain
prognostics when the storm is nigh at hand. When the lady is unusually
fretful, finds fault with the servants, is discontented with the
children, and complains much of the filthiness of everything about her,
these are signs which ought not to be neglected; yet they are not
decisive, as they sometimes come on and go off again without producing
any farther effect. But if, when the husband rises in the morning, he
should observe in the yard a wheelbarrow with a quantity of lime in it,
or should see certain buckets with lime dissolved in water, there is
then no time to be lost; he immediately locks up the apartment or closet
where his papers or his private property is kept, and, putting the key
in his pocket, betakes himself to flight, for a husband, however
beloved, becomes a perfect nuisance during the season of female rage;
his authority is superseded, his commission is suspended, and the very
scullion who cleans the brasses in the kitchen becomes of more
consideration and importance than him. He has nothing for it but to
abdicate, and run from an evil which he can neither prevent nor mollify.
The husband gone, the ceremony begins. The walls are in a few minutes
stripped of their furniture: paintings, prints, and looking-glasses lie
in a huddled heap about the floors; the curtains are torn from the
testers, the beds crammed into the windows; chairs and tables, bedsteads
and cradles, crowd the yard; and the garden fence bends beneath the
weight of carpets, blankets, cloth cloaks, old coats, and ragged
breeches. Here may be seen the lumber of the kitchen, forming a dark
and confused mass: for the foreground of the picture, grid irons and
frying-pans, rusty shovels and broken tongs, spits and pots,
joint-stools, and the fractured remains of rush-bottomed chairs. There
a closet has disgorged its bowels, cracked tumblers, broken wineglasses,
vials of forgotten physic, papers of unknown powders, seeds, and dried
herbs, handfuls of old corks, tops of teapots, and stoppers of departed
decanters; from the raghole in the garret to the rathole in the cellar,
no place escapes unrummaged. It would seem as if the day of general doom
was come, and the utensils of the house were dragged forth to judgment.
In this tempest the words of Lear naturally present themselves, and
might, with some alteration, be made strictly applicable:
"Let the great gods,
That keep this dreadful pother o'er our heads,
Find out their enemies now. Tremble, thou wretch,
That hast within thee undivulged crimes
Unwhipp'd of justice!
"Close pent-up guilt,
Raise your concealing continents, and ask
These dreadful summoners grace!"
This ceremony completed and the house thoroughly evacuated, the next
operation is to smear the walls and ceilings of every room and closet
with brushes dipped in a solution of lime, called white wash; to pour
buckets of water over every floor, and scratch all the partitions and
wainscots with rough brushes wet with soapsuds and dipped in
stonecutter's sand. The windows by no means escape the general deluge. A
servant scrambles out upon the penthouse, at the risk of her neck, and
with a mug in her hand and a bucket within reach, she dashes away
innumerable gallons of water against the glass panes, to the great
annoyance of the passengers in the street.
I have been told that an action at law was once brought against one of
these water nymphs, by a person who had a new suit of clothes spoiled by
this operation; but, after long argument, it was determined by the whole
court that the action would not lie, inasmuch as the defendant was in
the exercise of a legal right, and not answerable for the consequences:
and so the poor gentleman was doubly nonsuited, for he lost not only his
suit of clothes, but his suit at law.
These smearings and scratchings, washings and dashings, being duly
performed, the next ceremonial is to cleanse and replace the distracted
furniture. You may have seen a house-raising or a ship-launch, when all
the hands within reach are collected together: recollect, if you can,
the hurry, bustle, confusion, and noise of such a scene, and you will
have some idea of this cleaning match. The misfortune is, that the sole
object is to make things clean; it matters not how many useful,
ornamental, or valuable articles are mutilated or suffer death under the
operation; a mahogany chair and carved frame undergo the same
discipline; they are to be made clean at all events, but their
preservation is not worthy of attention. For instance, a fine large
engraving is laid flat on the floor, smaller prints are piled upon it,
and the superincumbent weight cracks the glasses of the lower tier: but
this is of no consequence. A valuable picture is placed leaning against
the sharp corner of a table, others are made to lean against that, until
the pressure of the whole forces the corner of the table through the
canvass of the first. The frame and glass of a fine print are to be
cleaned; the spirit and oil used on this occasion are suffered to leak
through and spoil the engraving; no matter, if the glass is clean and
the frame shine, it is sufficient; the rest is not worthy of
consideration. An able arithmetician has made an accurate calculation,
founded on long experience, and has discovered that the losses and
destructions incident to two whitewashings are equal to one removal, and
three removals equal to one fire.
The cleaning frolic over, matters begin to resume their pristine
appearance. The storm abates, and all would be well again; but it is
impossible that so great a convulsion in so small a community should not
produce some farther effects. For two or three weeks after the
operation, the family are usually afflicted with sore throats or sore
eyes, occasioned by the caustic quality of the lime, or with severe
colds from the exhalations of wet floors or damp walls.
I know a gentleman who was fond of accounting for everything in a
philosophical way. He considers this, which I have called a custom, as a
real periodical disease, peculiar to the climate. His train of reasoning
is ingenious and whimsical, but I am not at leisure to give you a
detail. The result was, that he found the distemper to be incurable;
but, after much study, he conceived he had discovered a method to divert
the evil he could not subdue. For this purpose he caused a small
building, about twelve feet square, to be erected in his garden, and
furnished with some ordinary chairs and tables, and a few prints of the
cheapest sort were hung against the walls. His hope was, that when the
whitewashing phrensy seized the females of his family, they might repair
to this apartment, and scrub, and smear, and scour to their heart's
content, and so spend the violence of the disease in this outpost, while
he enjoyed himself in quiet at headquarters. But the experiment did not
answer his expectation; it was impossible it should, since a principal
part of the gratification consists in the lady's having an uncontrolled
right to torment her husband at least once a year, and to turn him out
of doors, and take the reins of government into her own hands.
There is a much better contrivance than this of the philosopher, which
is, to cover the walls of the house with paper; this is generally done,
and though it cannot abolish, it at least shortens the period of female
dominion. The paper is decorated with flowers of various fancies, and
made so ornamental, that the women have admitted the fashion without
perceiving the design.
There is also another alleviation of the husband's distress; he
generally has the privilege of a small room or closet for his books and
papers, the key of which he is allowed to keep. This is considered as a
privileged place, and stands like the land of Goshen amid the plagues of
Egypt. But then he must be extremely cautious, and ever on his guard.
For should he inadvertently go abroad and leave the key in his door, the
housemaid, who is always on the watch for such an opportunity,
immediately enters in triumph with buckets, brooms, and brushes; takes
possession of the premises, and forthwith puts all his books and papers
to rights, to his utter confusion and sometimes serious detriment. For
instance:
A gentleman was sued by the executors of a tradesman, on a charge found
against him in the deceased's books to the amount of £30. The defendant
was strongly impressed with an idea that he had discharged the debt and
taken a receipt; but, as the transaction was of long standing, he knew
not where to find the receipt. The suit went on in course, and the time
approached when judgment would be obtained against him. He then sat
seriously down to examine a large bundle of old papers, which he had
untied and displayed on a table for that purpose. In the midst of his
search he was suddenly called away on business of importance; he forgot
to lock the door of his room. The housemaid, who had been long looking
out for such an opportunity, immediately entered with the usual
implements, and with great alacrity fell to cleaning the room and
putting things to rights. The first object that struck her eye was the
confused situation of the papers on the table; these were, without
delay, bundled together like so many dirty knives and forks; but, in the
action, a small piece of paper fell unnoticed on the floor, which
happened to be the very receipt in question: as it had no very
respectable appearance it was soon after swept out with the common dirt
of the room, and carried in a rubbish-pan into the yard. The tradesman
had neglected to enter the credit in his book; the defendant could find
nothing to obviate the charge, and so judgment went against him for the
debt and costs. A fortnight after the whole was settled and the money
paid, one of the children found the receipt among the rubbish in the
yard.
There is also another custom peculiar to the city of Philadelphia, and
nearly allied to the former. I mean that of washing the pavement before
the doors every Saturday evening. I at first took this to be a
regulation of the police, but, on a farther inquiry, find it is a
religious rite preparatory to the Sabbath, and is, I believe, the only
religious rite in which the numerous sectaries of this city perfectly
agree. The ceremony begins about sunset, and continues till about ten or
eleven at night. It is very difficult for a stranger to walk the streets
on those evenings; he runs a continual risk of having a bucket of dirty
water thrown against his legs; but a Philadelphian born is so much
accustomed to the danger that he avoids it with surprising dexterity. It
is from this circumstance that a Philadelphian may be known anywhere by
his gait. The streets of New-York are paved with rough stones; these,
indeed, are not washed, but the dirt is so thoroughly swept from before
the doors that the stones stand up sharp and prominent, to the great
inconvenience of those who are not accustomed to so rough a path. But
habit reconciles everything. It is diverting enough to see a
Philadelphian at New-York; he walks the streets with as much painful
caution as if his toes were covered with corns, or his feet lamed with
the gout: while a New-Yorker, as little approving the plain masonry of
Philadelphia, shuffles along the pavement like a parrot on a mahogany
table.
It must be acknowledged that the ablutions I have mentioned are attended
with no small inconvenience; but the women would not be induced, from
any consideration, to resign their privilege. Notwithstanding this, I
can give you the strongest assurances that the women of America make the
most faithful wives and the most attentive mothers in the world; and I
am sure you will join me in opinion, that if a married man is made
miserable only one week in a whole year, he will have no great cause
to complain of the matrimonial bond.
I am, &c.
Letter to Benjamin Vaughan, Esq.
March 14, 1785.
My Dear Friend
Among the pamphlets you lately sent me was one entitled Thoughts on
Executive Justice. In return for that, I send you a French one on the
same subject, Observations concernant l'Exécution de l'Article II. de
la Déclaration sur le Vol. They are both addressed to the judges, but
written, as you will see, in a very different spirit. The English author
is for hanging all thieves. The Frenchman is for proportioning
punishments to offences.
If we really believe, as we profess to believe, that the law of Moses
was the law of God, the dictate of Divine wisdom, infinitely superior to
human, on what principle do we ordain death as the punishment of an
offence which, according to that law, was only to be punished by a
restitution of fourfold? To put a man to death for an offence which does
not deserve death, is it not a murder? And as the French writer says,
Doit-on punir un délit contre la société par un crime contre la
nature?[8]
Superfluous property is the creature of society. Simple and mild laws
were sufficient to guard the property that was merely necessary. The
savage's bow, his hatchet, and his coat of skins, were sufficiently
secured, without law, by the fear of personal resentment and
retaliation. When, by virtue of the first laws, part of the society
accumulated wealth and grew powerful, they enacted others more severe,
and would protect their property at the expense of humanity. This was
abusing their power and commencing a tyranny. If a savage, before he
entered into society, had been told, "Your neighbour, by this means, may
become owner of a hundred deer; but if your brother, or your son, or
yourself, having no deer of your own, and being hungry, should kill one,
an infamous death must be the consequence," he would probably have
preferred his liberty, and his common right of killing any deer, to all
the advantages of society that might be proposed to him.
That it is better a hundred guilty persons should escape than that one
innocent person should suffer, is a maxim that has been long and
generally approved; never, that I know of, controverted. Even the
sanguinary author of the Thoughts agrees to it, adding well, "that the
very thought of injured innocence, and much more that of suffering
innocence, must awaken all our tenderest and most compassionate
feelings, and, at the same time, raise our highest indignation against
the instruments of it. But," he adds, "there is no danger of either
from a strict adherence to the laws." Really! is it then impossible to
make an unjust law? and if the law itself be unjust, may it not be the
very "instrument" which ought "to raise the author's and everybody's
highest indignation?" I see in the last newspapers from London that a
woman is capitally convicted at the Old Bailey for privately stealing
out of a shop some gauze, value fourteen shillings and threepence. Is
there any proportion between the injury done by a theft, value fourteen
shillings and threepence, and the punishment of a human creature, by
death, on a gibbet? Might not that woman, by her labour, have made the
reparation ordained by God in paying fourfold? Is not all punishment
inflicted beyond the merit of the offence, so much punishment of
innocence? In this light, how vast is the annual quantity of not only
injured, but suffering innocence, in almost all the civilized states
of Europe!
But it seems to have been thought that this kind of innocence may be
punished by way of preventing crimes. I have read, indeed, of a cruel
Turk in Barbary, who, whenever he bought a new Christian slave, ordered
him immediately to be hung up by the legs, and to receive a hundred
blows of a cudgel on the soles of his feet, that the severe sense of
punishment and fear of incurring it thereafter might prevent the faults
that should merit it. Our author himself would hardly approve entirely
of this Turk's conduct in the government of slaves; and yet he appears
to recommend something like it for the government of English subjects,
when he applauds the reply of Judge Burnet to the convict horsestealer;
who, being asked what he had to say why judgment of death should not
pass against him, and answering that it was hard to hang a man for
only stealing a horse, was told by the judge, "Man, thou art not to be
hanged only for stealing a horse, but that horses may not be stolen."
The man's answer, if candidly examined, will, I imagine, appear
reasonable, as being founded on the eternal principle of justice and
equity, that punishments should be proportioned to offences; and the
judge's reply brutal and unreasonable, though the writer "wishes all
judges to carry it with them whenever they go the circuit, and to bear
it in their minds, as containing a wise reason for all the penal
statutes which they are called upon to put in execution. It at once
illustrates," says he, "the true grounds and reasons of all capital
punishments whatsoever, namely, that every man's property, as well as
his life, may be held sacred and inviolate." Is there, then, no
difference in value between property and life? If I think it right that
the crime of murder should be punished with death, not only as an equal
punishment of the crime, but to prevent other murders, does it follow
that I must approve of inflicting the same punishment for a little
invasion on my property by theft? If I am not myself so barbarous, so
bloody-minded and revengeful, as to kill a fellow-creature for stealing
from me fourteen shillings and threepence, how can I approve of a law
that does it? Montesquieu, who was himself a judge, endeavours to
impress other maxims. He must have known what humane judges feel on such
occasions, and what the effects of those feelings; and, so far from
thinking that severe and excessive punishments prevent crimes, he
asserts, as quoted by our French writer, that
"L'atrocité des loix en empêche l'exécution.
"Lorsque la peine est sans mesure, on est souvent obligé de lui préférer
l'impunité.
"La cause de tous les relâchemens vient de l'impunité des crimes, et non
de la modération des peines."[9]
It is said by those who know Europe generally that there are more thefts
committed and punished annually in England than in all the other nations
put together. If this be so, there must be a cause or causes for such
depravity in our common people. May not one be the deficiency of justice
and morality in our national government, manifested in our oppressive
conduct to subjects, and unjust wars on our neighbours? View the
long-persisted-in, unjust, monopolizing treatment of Ireland, at length
acknowledged! View the plundering government exercised by our merchants
in the Indies; the confiscating war made upon the American colonies;
and, to say nothing of those upon France and Spain, view the late war
upon Holland, which was seen by impartial Europe in no other light than
that of a war of rapine and pillage; the hopes of an immense and easy
prey being its only apparent, and probably its true and real motive and
encouragement. Justice is as strictly due between neighbour nations as
between neighbour citizens. A highwayman is as much a robber when he
plunders in a gang as when single; and a nation that makes an unjust war
is only a great gang. After employing your people in robbing the Dutch,
it is strange that, being put out of that employ by peace, they still
continue robbing, and rob one another? Piraterie, as the French call
it, or privateering, is the universal bent of the English nation, at
home and abroad, wherever settled. No less than seven hundred privateers
were, it is said, commissioned in the last war! These were fitted out by
merchants, to prey upon other merchants who had never done them any
injury. Is there probably any one of those privateering merchants of
London, who were so ready to rob the merchants of Amsterdam, that would
not as easily plunder another London merchant of the next street, if he
could do it with the same impunity? The avidity, the alieni
appetens[10] is the same; it is the fear of the gallows that makes the
difference. How, then, can a nation, which among the honestest of its
people has so many thieves by inclination, and whose government
encouraged and commissioned no less than seven hundred gangs of robbers;
how can such a nation have the face to condemn the crime in individuals,
and hang up twenty of them in a morning! It naturally puts one in mind
of a Newgate anecdote. One of the prisoners complained that in the night
somebody had taken his buckles out of his shoes. "What the devil!" says
another, "have we then thieves among us? It must not be suffered. Let
us search out the rogue and pump him to death."
There is, however, one late instance of an English merchant who will not
profit by such ill-gotten gain. He was, it seems, part owner of a ship,
which the other owners thought fit to employ as a letter of marque,
which took a number of French prizes. The booty being shared, he has now
an agent here inquiring, by an advertisement in the Gazette, for those
who have suffered the loss, in order to make them, as far as in him
lies, restitution. This conscientious man is a Quaker. The Scotch
Presbyterians were formerly as tender; for there is still extant an
ordinance of the town-council of Edinburgh, made soon after the
Reformation, "forbidding the purchase of prize goods, under pain of
losing the freedom of the burgh for ever, with other punishment at the
will of the magistrate; the practice of making prizes being contrary to
good conscience, and the rule of treating Christian brethren as we would
wish to be treated; and such goods are not to be sold by any Godly man
within this burgh." The race of these Godly men in Scotland are
probably extinct, or their principles abandoned, since, as far as that
nation had a hand in promoting the war against the colonies, prizes and
confiscations are believed to have been a considerable motive.
It has been for some time a generally received opinion, that a military
man is not to inquire whether a war be just or unjust; he is to execute
his orders. All princes who are disposed to become tyrants must probably
approve of this opinion, and be willing to establish it; but is it not a
dangerous one? since, on that principle, if the tyrant commands his army
to attack and destroy not only an unoffending neighbour nation, but even
his own subjects, the army is bound to obey. A negro slave in our
colonies, being commanded by his master to rob and murder a neighbour,
or do any other immoral act, may refuse, and the magistrate will protect
him in his refusal. The slavery, then, of a soldier is worse than that
of a negro! A conscientious officer, if not restrained by the
apprehension of its being imputed to another cause, may indeed resign
rather than be employed in an unjust war; but the private men are slaves
for life; and they are, perhaps, incapable of judging for themselves. We
can only lament their fate, and still more that of a sailor, who is
often dragged by force from his honest occupation, and compelled to
imbrue his hands in perhaps innocent blood. But methinks it well
behooves merchants (men more enlightened by their education, and
perfectly free from any such force or obligation) to consider well of
the justice of a war, before they voluntarily engage a gang of ruffians
to attack their fellow-merchants of a neighbouring nation, to plunder
them of their property, and perhaps ruin them and their families if they
yield it, or to wound, maim, and murder them, if they endeavour to
defend it. Yet these things are done by Christian merchants, whether a
war be just or unjust; and it can hardly be just on both sides. They are
done by English and American merchants, who nevertheless complain of
private theft, and hang by dozens the thieves they have taught by their
own example.
It is high time, for the sake of humanity, that a stop were put to this
enormity. The United States of America, though better situated than any
European nation to make profit by privateering (most of the trade of
Europe with the West Indies passing before their doors), are, as far as
in them lies, endeavouring to abolish the practice, by offering, in all
their treaties with other powers, an article, engaging solemnly that, in
case of future war, no privateer shall be commissioned on either side;
and that unarmed merchant ships on both sides shall pursue their
voyages unmolested.[11] This will be a happy improvement of the law of
nations. The humane and the just cannot but wish general success to the
proposition.
With unchangeable esteem and affection,
I am, my dear friend,
Ever yours.
Mr. Gazetteer,
I am an honest tradesman, who never meant harm to anybody. My affairs
went on smoothly while a bachelor; but of late I have met with some
difficulties, of which I take the freedom to give you an account.
About the time I first addressed my present spouse, her father gave out
in speeches that, if she married a man he liked, he would give with her
two hundred pounds in cash on the day of marriage. He never said so much
to me, it is true; but he always received me very kindly at his house,
and openly countenanced my courtship. I formed several fine schemes what
to do with this same two hundred pounds, and in some measure neglected
my business on that account; but, unluckily, it came to pass, that, when
the old gentleman saw I was pretty well engaged, and that the match was
too far gone to be easily broke off, he, without any reason given, grew
very angry, forbid me the house, and told his daughter that if she
married me he would not give her a farthing. However (as he thought), we
were not to be disappointed in that manner, but, having stole a wedding,
I took her home to my house, where we were not quite in so poor a
condition as the couple described in the Scotch song, who had
"Neither pot nor pan,
But four bare legs together,"
for I had a house tolerably well furnished for a poor man before. No
thanks to Dad, who, I understand, was very much pleased with his politic
management; and I have since learned that there are other old
curmudgeons (so called) besides him, who have this trick to marry their
daughters, and yet keep what they might well spare till they can keep it
no longer. But this by way of digression; a word to the wise is enough.
I soon saw that with care and industry we might live tolerably easy and
in credit with our neighbours; but my wife had a strong inclination to
be a gentlewoman. In consequence of this, my oldfashioned looking-glass
was one day broke, as she said, no one could tell which way. However,
since we could not be without a glass in the room, "My dear," saith she,
"we may as well buy a large fashionable one, that Mr. Such-a-one has to
sell. It will cost but little more than a common glass, and will look
much handsomer and more creditable." Accordingly, the glass was bought
and hung against the wall; but in a week's time I was made sensible, by
little and little, that the table was by no means suitable to such a
glass; and, a more proper table being procured, some time after, my
spouse, who was an excellent contriver, informed me where we might have
very handsome chairs in the way; and thus, by degrees, I found all my
old furniture stowed up in the garret, and everything below altered for
the better.
Had we stopped here, it might have done well enough. But my wife being
entertained with tea by the good woman she visited, we could do no less
than the like when they visited us; so we got a teatable, with all its
appurtenances of China and silver. Then my spouse unfortunately
overworked herself in washing the house, so that we could do no longer
without a maid. Besides this, it happened frequently that when I came
home at one, the dinner was but just put in the pot, and my dear
thought really it had been but eleven. At other times, when I came at
the same hour, she wondered I would stay so long, for dinner was ready
about one, and had waited for me these two hours. These irregularities,
occasioned by mistaking the time, convinced me that it was absolutely
necessary to buy a clock, which my spouse observed was a great
ornament to the room. And lastly, to my grief, she was troubled with
some ailment or other, and nothing did her so much good as riding, and
these hackney-horses were such wretched ugly creatures that—I bought a
very fine pacing mare, which cost twenty pounds; and hereabouts affairs
have stood for about a twelvemonth past.
I could see all along that this did not at all suit with my
circumstances, but had not resolution enough to help it, till lately,
receiving a very severe dun, which mentioned the next court, I began in
earnest to project relief. Last Monday, my dear went over the river to
see a relation and stay a fortnight, because she could not bear the heat
of the town air. In the interim I have taken my turn to make
alterations; namely, I have turned away the maid, bag and baggage (for
what should we do with a maid, who, besides our boy, have none but
ourselves?) I have sold the pacing mare, and bought a good milch-cow
with three pounds of the money. I have disposed of the table, and put a
good spinning-wheel in its place, which, methinks, looks very pretty;
nine empty canisters I have stuffed with flax, and with some of the
money of the tea-furniture I have bought a set of knitting-needles, for,
to tell you the truth, I begin to want stockings. The fine clock I
have transformed into an hourglass, by which I have gained a good round
sum; and one of the pieces of the old looking-glass, squared and framed,
supplies the place of the great one, which I have conveyed into a
closet, where it may possibly remain some years. In short, the face of
things is quite changed, and methinks you would smile to see my
hourglass hanging in the place of the clock. What a great ornament it
is to the room! I have paid my debts, and find money in my pocket. I
expect my dear home next Friday, and, as your paper is taken at the
house where she is, I hope the reading of this will prepare her mind for
the above surprising revolutions. If she can conform herself to this new
manner of living, we shall be the happiest couple, perhaps, in the
province, and, by the blessing of God, may soon be in thriving
circumstances. I have reserved the great glass, because I know her heart
is set upon it; I will allow her, when she comes in, to be taken
suddenly ill with the headache, the stomach-ache, fainting-fits,
or whatever other disorder she may think more proper, and she may retire
to bed as soon as she pleases. But if I should not find her in perfect
health, both of body and mind, the next morning, away goes the aforesaid
great glass, with several other trinkets I have no occasion for, to the
vendue, that very day; which is the irrevocable resolution
Of, sir, her loving husband and
Your very humble servant,
Anthony Afterwit.
P.S.—I would be glad to know how you approve my conduct.
Answer.—I don't love to concern myself in affairs between man and
wife.