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BY
MRS. MARY J. HOLMES,
AUTHOR OF “THE HOMESTEAD ON THE HILL SIDE,” “’LENA RIVERS,” “TEMPEST AND SUNSHINE,” ETC.
NEW YORK:
C. M. SAXTON, 25 PARK ROW.
1858.
Entered, according to Act of Congress, in the year one thousand eight hundred and fifty-seven,
BY MILLER, ORTON & Co.,
In the Clerk’s Office of the District Court of the United States, for the Southern District of New York.
W. H. TIMSON, STEREOTYPER. R. O. JENKINS, PRINTER.
TO
MY MOTHER,
Who, more than any one else, will be interested in a story
which has in it so much of my childhood and early home,
THIS WORK
is affectionately dedicated by her Daughter
MARY.
PREFACE.
v
In this story of Meadow Brook there is, I am aware,
nothing very startling or wonderful; but it has the merit, at
least, of containing more truth than books of the same
character usually possess. From this, however, the reader
is not to infer that I have made myself the heroine; for
though the early home, the childhood, and childish experience
of “Rosa Lee” are mostly my own—while more than
one whiskered young man will recognize the little girl of
thirteen, at whom he once made faces from behind his desk
as the “schoolma’am”—the similarity extends no further.
The fickle Mr. Clayton and his haughty bride, the unfortunate
Herbert, the disappointed Ada, the proud Southern
planter, and the gentle, bright-haired Jessie, are intended to
represent different varieties of American character, and are
such as many of us have met in our intercourse with the
world. For my portrayals of Georgia life, I am indebted to
via friend, who recently spent two years in that State, and
whose graphic descriptions of what she there saw have been
to me of much service.
Believing that the world loves better to read of the probable
than of the improbable, I have tried to be natural; and
if, by this means, but one friend is added to the number I
now possess, I shall feel that my labor has not been in
vain.
Far away among the New England hills stands a large,
old-fashioned farmhouse, around whose hearth-stone not
many years agone, a band of merry, noisy children played,
myself the merriest, noisiest of them all. It stood upon
an eminence overlooking a broad strip of rolling meadow-land,
at the extremity of which was the old grey rock,
where the golden rod and sassafras grew, where the green
ivy crept over the crumbling wall, and where, under the
shadow of the thorn-apple tree, we built our play-houses,
drinking our tea from the acorn saucers, and painting our
dolls’ faces with the red juice of the poke berries, which
grew there in great abundance.
Just opposite our house, and across the green meadow,
was a shady grove, where, in the spring-time, the singing
birds made their nests, and where, when the breath of
winter was on the snow-clad hills, Lizzie, Carrie, and I, and
our taller, stronger brothers dragged our sleds, dashing
10swiftly down the steep hill, and away over the ice-covered
valley below. Truly, ours was a joyous childhood, and
ours a happy home; for never elsewhere fell the summer’s
golden sunlight so softly, and never was music sweeter than
was the murmur of the dancing water-brook which ran past
our door, and down the long green lane, losing itself at last
in the dim old woods, which stretched away to the westward,
seeming to my childish imagination the boundary
line between this world and the next.
In the deep shadow of those woods I have sat alone for
many an hour, watching the white, feathery clouds as they
glimmered through the dense foliage which hung above
my head, and musing, I scarcely knew of what. Strange fancies
filled my brain and oftentimes, as I sat there in the
hazy light of an autumnal afternoon, there came and
talked with me myriads of little people, unseen, it is true,
but still real to me, who knew and called them all by name.
There, on a mossy bank, beneath a wide-spreading grape-vine,
with the running brook at my feet, I felt the first longings
for fame, though I did not thus designate it then. I
only knew that I wanted a name, which should live when I
was gone—a name of which my mother should be proud.
It had been to me a day of peculiar trial. At school everything
had gone wrong. Accidentally I had discovered that
I possessed a talent for rhyming; and so, because I preferred
filling my slate with verses, instead of proving on it that
four times twenty were eighty, and that eighty, divided by
twenty, equalled four, my teacher must needs find fault with
me, calling me “lazy,” and compelling me to sit between
two hateful boys, with warty hands, who for the remainder
of the afternoon amused themselves by sitting inconveniently
near to me, and by telling me how big my eyes and
feet were. I hardly think I should now mind that mode of
11punishment, provided I could choose the boys, but I did
then, and in the worst of humors, I started for home, where
other annoyances awaited me. Sally, the housemaid,
scolded me for upsetting a pan of milk on her clean pantry
shelf, calling me “the carelessest young one she ever saw,”
and predicting that “I’d one day come to the gallus if I
didn’t mend my ways.”
Juliet, my oldest sister, scolded me for wearing without
her consent her shell side-comb, which, in climbing through
a hole in the plastering of the schoolhouse, I accidentally
broke. Grandmother scolded me for mounting to the top
of her high chest of drawers to see what was in them; and
to crown all, when, towards sunset, I came in from a romp
in the barn, with my yellow hair flying all over my face, my
dress burst open, my pantalet split from the top downward,
and my sun-bonnet hanging down my back, my mother reproved
me severely, telling me I was “a sight to behold.”
This was my usual style of dress, and I didn’t think any one
need interfere; so, when she wondered if there ever was
another such child, and bade me look at myself in the glass,
asking if “I didn’t think I was a beautiful object,” my heart
came up in my throat, and with the angry response that
“I couldn’t help my looks—I didn’t make myself,” I started
through the door, and running down the long lane to the
grape-vine, my favorite resort, I threw myself upon the
ground, and burying my face in the tall grass, wept bitterly,
wishing I had never been born, or, being born, that
the ban of ugliness were not upon me.
Mother doesn’t love me, I thought—nobody loves me;
and then I wished that I could die, for I had heard that the
first dead of a family, no matter how unprepossessing they
had been in life, were sure to be the best beloved in the
memory of the living. To die, then, that I might be loved
12was all I asked for, as I lay there weeping alone, and thinking
in my childish grief that never before was a girl, nine
summers old, so wretched as myself. And then, in my imagination,
I went through with a mental rehearsal of my own
obsequies, fancying that I was dead, but still possessing the
faculty of knowing all that passed around me.
With an involuntary shudder, I crossed my hands upon
my bosom, stretched my feet upon the mossy bank, and
closed my eyes to the fading sunlight, which I was never to
see again. I knew they would lay me in the parlor, and on
my forehead I felt the gentle breeze as it came through the
open window, lifting the folds of the muslin curtain which
shaded it. Throughout the house was a deep hush, and in
my mother’s voice there was a heartbroken tone, which I
had never heard before, and which thrilled me with joy, for
it said that I was loved at last. Then I thought how lonely
they would be as day by day went and came, and I came no
more among them. “They will miss the little ugly face,” I
said, and on my cheek my own hot tears fell as I thought
how Lizzie would mourn for me in the dark night time,
weeping that I was not by her side, but sleeping in a narrow
coffin, which I hoped would be a handsome one with
satin hangings, as I had seen at the funeral of a rich neighbor’s
fair young bride. I did not want them to strew my
pillow with roses as they did hers—for I knew they would
not accord with my thin, plain face. In the distance I
heard the sound of the tolling bell, and I saw the subdued
expression on the faces of my school companions as they listened
breathlessly, counting at last the nine quick strokes,
which would tell to a stranger that ’twas only a child who
was gone.
Then came the funeral, the roll of wheels, the tread of
many feet, the hum of voices, the prayer, the hymn, in which
13I longed to join, but dared not for appearances’ sake, and
then, one by one, they stole up for a last farewell, lifting my
baby brother and bidding him look upon the sister he would
never know save by the grassy mound where they would tell
him she was buried. I knew when Lizzie bent over me by
the convulsive sob and burning kiss which she pressed upon
my lips, and divining her inmost thoughts, I fancied she was
wishing that no harsh word had ever passed between us
In my heart I longed to tell her how freely I forgave her,
but ere I had time to do so, she stepped aside, while an
older, a wrinkled hand was laid upon my forehead, and my
aged grandmother murmured, “Poor little Rosa, far better
that I should die, than that she, so young, should be laid in
the lonesome grave.”
Instantly the dark grave loomed up before me, so dark
and dreary that I shrank from being put there. I could not
die; I was afraid to sleep with the silent dead. I would
far rather live, even though I lived unloved forever. And
then, softly in my ear, a spirit friend whispered, “Be great
and good—get to yourself a name of which they shall be
proud—make them love you for your deeds, rather than
your looks, and when, in the future, strangers shall ask concerning
you, ‘Who is she?’ let it be their pride to answer,
‘My daughter,’ or ‘My sister.’” Older and wiser heads
than mine would have said it was Ambition, which thus
counselled with me, but I questioned her not of her name.
I only knew that her words were sweet and soothing, and I
treasured them in my heart, pondering upon them until I
fell asleep, unconscious that the daylight was fast declining,
and that the heavy dew was falling upon my uncovered
head.
Meantime at home many inquiries were being made concerning
my whereabouts, and when, at last, night came on,
14and I was still away, my oldest brother was sent in quest
of me down the long lane where I was last seen by Lizzie,
who had attempted to follow me, but had desisted through
fear of being called a tag. I was just dreaming that the
trumpet of fame was sounding forth my name, when, alas!
I awoke to find it was only brother Charlie, making the
woods resound with “Rosa Lee! Where are you? Why
don’t you answer?”
Of course I was disappointed,—who wouldn’t be?—and
in a fit of obstinacy I determined not to reply, but to make
him think I was lost—then see how he’d feel! But on this
point I was not to be gratified, for failing of finding me in
the lane, he made straight for the grape-vine, where he
stumbled over me as I lay, this time feigning sleep, to see
what he would do. Seizing me by the shoulder, he
exclaimed, “You are a pretty bird, scaring us out of a
year’s growth. Mother’ll scold you well for this.”
But he was mistaken, for mother’s manner towards me
was greatly changed. The torn pantalet and the chewed
bonnet-strings were all forgotten, and in the kindest tone
she asked, “If I were not cold, and why I went to sleep on
the grass.” There were tears in my eyes, but I winked hard
and forced them back, until Lizzie brought me a piece of
custard pie (my special favorite) which, she said, “she had
saved for me, because she knew how much I loved it.”
This was too much, and sitting down in Carrie’s little
chair, I cried aloud, saying in reply to the oft-repeated
question as to what ailed me, that “I didn’t know, only
I was so glad.”
“Hystericky as a witch,” was Sally’s characteristic comment
on my strange behavior, at the same time she suggested
that I be put to bed.
To this I made no objection, and pushing aside the pie,
15which, to Lizzie’s disappointment, I could not eat, I went to
my room, a happier, and I believe, a better girl; so much
influence has a kind word or deed upon a desponding, sensitive
child. That night I was tired and restless, turning
uneasily upon my pillow, pushing Lizzie’s arm from my
neck, because it kept me from breathing, and lying awake
until I heard the long clock in grandma’s room strike the
hour of twelve. Then I slept, but dreamed there was a
heavy pain in my head, which made me moan in my sleep,
and that mother, attracted by the sound, came to my side,
feeling my pulse, and saying, “What ails you, Rosa?”
“There was nothing ailed me,” I said; but in the morning
when I awoke, the pain was still there, though I would not
acknowledge it, for scarcely anything could tempt me to
stay away from school; so at the usual hour I started, but
the road was long and wearisome, and twice I sat down to
rest, leaning my forehead upon the handle of my dinner basket,
and wondering why the smell of its contents made
me so sick. Arrived at school, everything seemed strange,
and when Maria, the girl who shared my desk, produced a
love-letter from Tom Jenkins, which she had found on my
side of the desk, and in which he made a formal offer of
himself, frecks and all, I did not even smile. Taking my
book, I attempted to study, but the words ran together, the
objects in the room chased each other in circles, the little
Abecedarian, shouting the alphabet at the top of his voice,
sounded like distant thunder, and when at last the teacher
called for our class in “Colburn,” she seemed to be a great
way off, while between her and me was a gathering darkness
which soon shut out every object from my view.
For a few moments all was confusion, and when at last
my faculties returned I was lying on the recitation bench,
my head resting in the teacher’s lap, while my hair and
16dress were so wet that I fancied I’d been out in a drenching
shower. Everybody was so kind and spoke so softly to me
that, with a vague impression that something had happened,
I began to cry. Just then, father, who had been sent for,
appeared, and taking me in his arms, started for home,
while Lizzie followed with the basket and my sun-bonnet,
which looked sorry and drooping like its owner. At the
door father asked of mother, who met us, “Where shall I
put her?” but ere she could reply, I said, “On grandmother’s
bed.”
And there, among the soft pillows and snowy linen on
which I had often looked with almost envious eyes, and
which now seemed so much to rest me, I was laid. Of the
weary weeks which followed, I have only a confused recollection.
I know that the room was darkened as far as possible,
and that before the window at the foot of the bed,
grandma’s black shawl was hung, one corner being occasionally
pinned back when more light was needed. After
a while it seemed to me that it was Lizzie, instead of
myself who was sick, and the physician said she had a fever,
which had been long coming on, but was undoubtedly
hastened by her sleeping on the wet grass in the night.
And so we all trod softly about the house, speaking in
whispers, and lifting the door-latches carefully, while Lizzie,
with my cap and night dress on, lay all day long in bed,
never speaking, never moving, except when the long clock
in the corner struck off the hour; then she would moan as
if in pain, and once when somebody, who looked like Lizzie,
but was still I, Rosa, stole on tiptoe to her side, with a
bouquet of flowers, which Maria had brought, she put her
arms around my neck, and pointing to the clock, whispered,
“It keeps saying ‘She’s dead’!—‘She’s dead’!—She’s
dead!’ Won’t you tell it to be still?”
17Then we knew that it disturbed her, and so the old clock
was stopped, a thing which grandma said “had not been in
fifty odd years,” except the time when grandpa died, and
then, with the going out of his life, the clock itself ran
down. All the night through the lamp burned upon the
table where stood the vials, the Dover powders, and the
cups, while Lizzie, with her great blue eyes so much like
mine, wide open, lay watching the flickering shadows on the
wall, counting the flowers on the paper bordering, wondering
if there ever were blue roses, and thinking if there were
that they must smell as the dinner did beneath the chestnut
tree.
At last, when the family were wearied out with watching,
the neighbors were called in, and among them our schoolteacher,
who seemed to tread on air, so light and noiseless
were her footsteps; and Lizzie, when she saw how kind she
was, wondered she had not loved her better. Then came
other watchers equally kind with Miss Phillips, but
possessing far less tact for nursing; and even now I have a
vivid remembrance of their annoying attempts “to fix me
so I’d be more comfortable.” Was I lying in a position
satisfactory to myself, I must be lifted up, my pillows
shaken, turned over, and my head placed so high that my
chin almost touched my chest. Did I fall into a little doze,
I must rouse up to tell whether I were asleep or not, and
did I get into a sound slumber, I must surely wake enough
to say whether I wanted anything.
Again, I fancied that another beside Lizzie was sick,
for in mother’s room, contiguous to mine, there was a low
hum of voices, agoing in and out, a careful shutting of the
door, and gradually I got the impression that Jamie, my
beautiful baby brother, was connected with all this, for I
heard them talk of scarlet fever, and it’s going hard with
18him. But I had no desire or power to ask the why or
wherefore; and so time wore on, until there came a day
when it seemed that the reverie beneath the grape-vine was
coming true. There was the same roll of wheels, the tread
of many feet, and through the closed doors I heard a mournful
strain, sung by trembling voices, while from afar, I
caught the notes of a tolling bell. I was much alone that
day, and once, for more than an hour, there was no one
with me excepting grandma, who frequently removed her
spectacles to wipe the moisture which gathered upon them.
From that day I grew worse, and they sent to Spencer
for Dr. Lamb, who, together with Dr. Griffin, held a
council over me, and said that I must die. I saw mother
when they told her. She was standing by the window, from
which the black shawl had been removed, for nothing
disturbed the little girl now, and the window was wide
open, so that the summer air might cool the burning head,
from which the matted yellow hair had all been shorn.
She turned pale as death, and with a cry of anguish, pressed
her hand upon her side; but she did not weep. I wondered
at it then, and thought she cared less than Lizzie, who sat
at the foot of the bed, sobbing so loudly that the fever
burned more fiercely in my veins, and the physician said
it must not be; she must leave the room, or keep quiet.
It was Monday, and a few hours afterward, as Sally
was passing the door, grandma handed her my dirty,
crumpled sun-bonnet, bidding her wash it and put it away.
Sally’s voice trembled as she replied, “No, no, leave it as
it is, for when she’s gone, nothing will look so much like
her as that jammed bonnet with its chewed up strings.”
A gush of tears was grandma’s only answer, and after I
got well, I found the bonnet carefully rolled up in a sheet
of clean white paper and laid away in Sally’s drawer.
19There were days and nights of entire unconsciousness, and
then with the vague, misty feeling of one awakening from
a long, disturbed sleep, I awoke again to life and reason. The
windows of my room were closed; but without, I heard the
patter of the September rain, and the sound of the autumnal
wind as it swept past the house. Gathered at my side
were my father, mother, brothers, sisters, grandmother;
and all, as my eye rested upon their faces, I thought,
were paler and more careworn than when I last looked
upon them. Something, too, in their dress disturbed me;
but, before I could speak, a voice which I knew to be Dr.
Griffin’s, said “She is better—she will live.”
From my mother’s lips there broke another cry—not like
that which I had heard when they told her I must die—but
a cry of joy, and then she fell fainting in my father’s
arms. I never doubted her love for me again, but in bitterness
of spirit, I have many a time wept that I ever distrusted
her, my blessed mother.
The fourth day after the crisis I was alone with Lizzie,
whom, for a long time, I importuned to give me a mirror that
I might see myself once more. Yielding at length to my
entreaties, she handed me a small looking glass, a wedding
gift to my grandmother, and with the consoling remark,
that “I wouldn’t always look so,” awaited the result. I am
older than I was then, but even now I cannot repress a
smile as I bring before my mind the shorn head, the wasted
face with high cheek-bones, and the big blue eyes, in which
there was a look of “crazy Sal,” which met my view. With
the angry exclamation, “They’ll hate me worse than ever,
I’m so ugly,” I dashed the mirror upon the floor, breaking
it in a thousand pieces. Lizzie knew what I meant,
and twining her arms about my neck, she said, “Don’t
talk so, Rosa; we love you dearly, and it almost killed us
20when we thought you couldn’t live. You know big men
never cry, and pa the least of all. Why, he didn’t shed a
tear when lit”——
Here she stopped suddenly, as if on a forbidden subject,
but soon resuming the conversation, she continued, “But
the day Dr. Lamb was here and told us you would die,
he was out under the cherry tree by our play-house, and
when Carrie asked him if you’d never play there any more,
he didn’t answer, but turned his face towards the barn, and
cried so hard and so loud, that grandma came out and
pitied him, smoothing his hair just like he was a little boy.
Brother Charlie, too, lay right down in the grass, and said
he’d give everything he’d got if he’d never called you
‘bung-eyed,’ nor made fun of you, for he loved you best
of all. Then there was poor Jamie kept calling for
‘Yosa’”——
Here Lizzie broke down entirely, saying, “I can’t tell
you any more, don’t ask me.”
Suddenly it occurred to me that I had neither seen nor
heard little Jamie, the youngest of us all, the pet and
darling of our household. Rapidly my thoughts traversed
the past, and in a moment I saw it all. “Jamie was dead.”
I did not need that Lizzie should tell me so. I knew it
was true, and when the first great shock was over, I questioned
her of his death, how and when it occurred. It
seems that I was at first taken with scarlet fever, which
soon assumed another form, but not until it had communicated
itself to Jamie, who, after a few days’ suffering, had
died. I had ever been his favorite, and to the last he had
called for me to come; my grandmother, with the superstition
natural to her age, construing it into an omen that I
was soon to follow him.
Desolate and dreary seemed the house; and when I was
21able to go from room to room, oh! how my heart ached as
I missed the prattle of our baby-boy. Away to the garret,
where no one could see it, they had carried his empty
cradle, but I sought it out; and as I thought of the soft,
brown curls I had so often seen resting there, and would
never see again, I sat down by its side and wept most
bitterly. The withered, yellow leaves of autumn were
falling upon his grave ere I was able to visit it, and at its
head stood a simple stone, on which was inscribed, “Our
Jamie.” As I leaned against the cold marble, and in fancy
saw by its side—what had well-nigh been—another mound,
and another stone, bearing upon it the name of “Rosa,”
I involuntarily shuddered; while from my heart there went
up a silent thanksgiving, that God, in his wise Providence,
had ordered it otherwise.
From that sickness I date a more healthful state of mind
and feeling, and though I still shrunk from any allusion to
my personal appearance, I never again doubted the love
of those who had manifested so much solicitude for me
when ill, and who watched over me so tenderly during the
period of my convalescence, which was long and wearisome,
for the snows of an early winter lay upon the frozen
ground, ere I was well enough to take my accustomed
place in the old brown schoolhouse at the foot of the long
hill.
CHAPTER II. THANKSGIVING.
22
Thanksgiving! How many reminiscences of the olden
time does that word call up, when sons and daughters, they
who had wandered far and wide, whose locks, once brown
and shining with the sunlight of youth, now give tokens
that the autumnal frosts of life are falling slowly upon
them, return once more to the old hearth-stone, and, for
a brief space, grow young again amid the festive scenes
of Thanksgiving Day. To you, who, like me, drew your
first breath among the New England hills, and who have
strayed away from your early home, in the busy world in
which you are now mingling, comes there not occasionally
pleasant memories of the olden time, when with eager haste
you hied you back to the roof-tree which sheltered your
infancy? And though, perchance, the snows of many a
winter may have drifted across the graves of the gray-haired
man you called your father, and the mild-eyed
woman who bore the blessed name of mother, can you not
recall them to mind, as when with tears of joy and words
of love, they welcomed their children home, thanking God
that as yet not one of their household treasures was missing?
And if, after the lapse of years, there came a time when
the youngest of you all was gone, when the childish prattle
you loved so well to hear was hushed, when through the
23house was no more heard the patter of little, busy feet,
when there was naught left of the lost one, save a curl of
golden hair, or a tiny shoe, soiled and bent, but looking still
so much like him who wore it once, that you preserve it as
your choicest treasure: if, I say, there came to you a time
like this, do you not remember how, amid all the social
cheer, there was still an aching void, which nothing around
you could fill?
But lest I make this chapter too sad, I shall not speak of
our feelings as we missed our baby brother, for they who
have lost from their fireside an active, playful child, understand
far better than I can describe, the loneliness, the longing
for something gone, which becomes almost a part of
their being, although at times they may seem to forget.
Children’s grief is seldom as lasting as that of mature years;
and hence it is not strange if I sometimes forgot my sorrow
in the joyous anticipation of Thanksgiving Day, which was
then to me but another name for plum puddings, chicken
pies, meeting dresses, morocco shoes, city cousins, a fire in
the parlor, and last, though not least, the privilege of sitting
at the first table, and using grandma’s six tiny silver
spoons, with the initials of her maiden name, “P. S.” marked
upon them.
On such occasions my thoughts invariably took a leap
backward, and looking at grandma’s wrinkled face and
white, shining hair, I would wonder if she ever were young
like me; and if, being young, she swung on gates or climbed
trees, and walked the great beams, as I did. Then, with
another bound, my thoughts would penetrate the future,
when I, a dignified grandmother, should recline in my arm-chair,
stately and stiff, in my heavy satin and silver gray,
while my oldest son, a man just my father’s size, should render
me all the homage and respect due to one of my age.
24By myself, too, I had several times tried on grandma’s
clothes, spectacles, cap and all; and then, seated in her chair,
with the big Bible in my lap, I had expounded scripture to
the imaginary children around me, frequently reprimanding
Rosa for her inattention, asking her what “she thought
would become of her, if she didn’t stop wriggling so in her
chair, and learn ‘the chief end of man.’” Once, in the
midst of my performance, grandma herself appeared, and as
a natural consequence, I was divested of my fixings in a
much shorter space of time than it had taken me to don
them. From that day up to the period of my illness, I verily
believe grandma looked upon me as “given over to hardness
of heart and blindness of mind.”
But I am wandering from my subject, which was, I believe,
the Thanksgiving succeeding Jamie’s death and my
own recovery from sickness. For this occasion great preparations
were made, it being confidently expected that my father’s
brother, who lived in Boston, would be with us, together
with his wife, a lady whose reputation for sociability
and suavity of manners was, with us, rather below par. She
was my uncle’s second wife, and rumor said that neither
himself nor his home were as comfortable as they once had
been. From the same reliable source, too, we learned that
she breakfasted in her own room at ten, dined at three,
made or received calls until six, went to parties, soirées, or
the theatre in the evening, and seldom got to bed until
two o’clock in the morning; a mode of living which was pronounced
little better than heathenish by grandma, who had
long been anxious for an opportunity of “giving Charlotte
Ann a piece of her mind.”
Mother, who was more discreet, very wisely advised her
not to interfere with the arrangements of her daughter-in-law.
“It would do no good,” she said, “and might possibly
25make matters worse.” Unlike most old people, grandma
was not very much set in her own way, and to mother’s
suggestion, she replied that “Mebby she shouldn’t say anything—’twould
depend on how many airs Charlotte put on.”
To me the expected visit was a sore trial; for, notwithstanding
my cheeks and neck were rounder and fuller than
they had ever been, my head, with its young crop of short,
stiff hair, was a terrible annoyance, and more than once I
had cried as I saw in fancy the derisive smile with which
my dreaded Aunt Charlotte was sure to greet me. At last
sister Anna, who possessed a great deal of taste in such
matters, and who ought to have been a milliner, contrived
for the “picked chicken,” as she called me, a black lace cap,
which fitted me so well, and was so vastly becoming that I
lost all my fears, and child-like, began to count the days
which must elapse before I could wear it.
Meantime, in the kitchen there was a loud rattling of
dishes, a beating of eggs, and calling for wood, with which
to heat the great brick oven, grandma having pronounced
the stove unfit for baking a Thanksgiving dinner. From the
cornfield, behind the barn, a golden pumpkin, four times
larger than my head and about the same color, was gathered,
and after being brought to the house, was pared,
cut open, scraped, and sliced into a little tin kettle with a
copper bottom, where for hours it stewed and sputtered, filling
the atmosphere with a faint, sickly odor, which I think
was the main cause of the severe headache I took to bed
with me. Mother, on the contrary, differed from me, she
associating it in some way with the rapid disappearance of
the raisins, cinnamon, sugar, and so forth, which, in sundry
brown papers, lay open upon the table. She was generally
right when she made up her mind, so I shall not
dispute the point, for, let the cause have been what it
26would, it was a very sick little girl which, the night before
Thanksgiving, was put early to bed by Sally, who remarked,
as she undressed me, that “I was slimpsy as a rag, and she
wouldn’t wonder if I had a collapse,” adding, as she tucked
the clothes around me, that “if I did, it would be mighty
apt to go hard with me.”
The next morning, just as the first grey streaks of daylight
were appearing in the east, I awoke, finding, to my great
joy, that my headache was gone. Rising upon my elbow
and leaning far out of bed, I pushed aside the striped curtain
which shaded the window, and looking out upon the
ground below, saw, to my utter dismay, that it was covered
with snow. To me there is nothing pleasant in a snow
storm, a snow bank, or a snow cloud; and when a child, I
used to think that with the fall of the first flake, there came
over my spirits a chill, which was not removed until the
spring-time, when, with its cause, it melted away: and even
now, when, with my rubber boots, I dare brave any drift,
not more than five feet four inches high, I cannot say that I
have any particular love for snow; and as from my window
I watch the descent of the feathery flakes, I always feel an
irresistible desire to make at them wry faces, my favorite
method of showing my dislike. On the morning of which I
have spoken, I vented my displeasure in the usual way, and
then I fell into a deep sleep, from which I was at last awakened
by the loud shouts of my brothers, who, in the meadow
across the road, were pelting each other with balls, occasionally
rolling over in the pure, white snow, which they
hailed as an old and well loved friend.
Not long after breakfast was over Anna, commenced
dressing Lizzie and Carrie, and as she had herself to beautify
before the arrival of the train which was to bring my
uncle and aunt, it is not surprising that she hurried rather
27faster then was wholly agreeable to the little girls, who
could see no good cause for such haste, even if Herbert
Langley, my aunt’s son and a youth of seventeen, was to
accompany her. I, however, who was older, read things
differently, and when Anna pulled Lizzie’s curly hair, and
washed Carrie’s nose up instead of down, until they both
cried, and when she herself stood before the glass a whole
half hour, arranging just in front of her ears two spit curls,
sometimes called “beau catchers,” I shrugged my shoulders,
wondering if she thought a city boy would care for her.
The morning train from Boston was due about ten o’clock,
and as Meadow Brook did not then boast a daily omnibus,
it was necessary that some one should be at the dépôt in
order to meet our expected guests. In New England it is
almost an unheard-of thing for an entire family to remain
away from church on Thanksgiving Day, but considering all
the circumstances, it was, on this occasion, decided orthodox
for us to do so, and accordingly at nine o’clock father
and old sorrel started for the dépôt, which was distant
about two and a half miles. Long and wearisome to us
children was that waiting for his return; for stiff and prim,
as starched white aprons, best gowns, and hemstitched
pantalets could make us, we sat in a row like so many
automatons, scarcely daring to move, lest we should displace
some article of dress. In the best chamber, the room which
Aunt Charlotte was to occupy, a cheerful wood fire was
burning, and at least a dozen times did grandma go up
there to see if all were right, now smoothing the clean,
linen pillow-case, now moving the large easy-chair a little
more to the centre of the room, and again wiping from the
mirror some imaginary specks of dust.
As she was coming down the twelfth time, the sound of
sleigh-bells took us all to the window, where, instead of the
28costly furs and rich velvet wrappings of Aunt Charlotte, we
saw the coarse plaid shawl and dark delaine hood of Aunt
Betsey, while at her side was the shaggy overcoat and sealskin
cap of her better half, Uncle Jason. This worthy
couple, good enough in their way, lived in Union, about
nine miles from Meadow Brook, where, for the last ten
years, they had been in the habit of spending Thanksgiving,
without ever seeming to think it possible for them to return
the compliment. Although we had never seen Aunt
Charlotte, we knew full well that there was nothing in common
between her and Aunt Betsey, and after a long consultation
it had been decided not to invite the latter, who, as
it proved, did not deem an invitation necessary.
Uncle Jason was my father’s half brother, and the stepson
of grandma, who, the moment she saw them was
actually guilty of the exclamation, “Good Lord! what
sent them here?” Before any of us could reply, the door
burst open, and the loud, boisterous laugh of Uncle Jason
greeted our ears, intermingled with the squeaky tones of
Aunt Betsey, who, addressing my mother, said, “How d’ye
dew, Fanny. You pretty well? I s’pose you’re lookin’ for
us, though you didn’t send us no invite? Jason kinder
held off about comin’, but I telled him ’twas enough sight
easier to eat dinner here than to cook it to hum.”
With as good a grace as she could possibly assume,
mother returned her greeting, and then, taking her into her
own bedroom, asked her to remove her bonnet, at the same
time telling her she was expecting Uncle Joseph and Aunt
Charlotte from Boston.
“Now, you don’t say it,” exclaimed Aunt Betsey,
stopping for a moment in the adjustment of her cap, the
fashion of which was wonderful, having been devised by herself,
as were all her articles of dress. “Now, dew tell if that
29puckerin’ thing is a comin’! How nipped up we shall
have to be! I’m so glad I wore this gown!” she continued,
looking complacently at her blue and white plaid, the skirt
of which was very short and scanty, besides being trimmed
at the bottom with two narrow ruffles.
With her other peculiarities Aunt Betsey united that of
jealousy, and after getting herself warm, and looking round,
as was her custom, she commenced with, “Now, if I won’t
give up—a fire in the parlor chamber. I s’pose Charlotte’s
too good to pull off her things in the bedroom, as I do.
Wall, it’s the luck of some to be born with a silver spoon in
their mouth.”
Grandma, who was the only person present except myself,
made no answer, and after a moment Aunt Betsey continued,
“Now I think on’t, Miss Lee (she never addressed
her as “mother,” for, from the first, a mutual dislike had
existed between them), now I think on’t, Miss Lee, mebby
Fanny meant to slight me.”
“Fanny never slighted anybody,” was grandma’s reply,
while her polished knitting-needles rattled with a vengeance.
“Wall, I guess she thought Jo’s wife and I wouldn’t
hitch hosses exactly, but the land knows that I don’t care
the snap of my finger for her. I’m as good as anybody, if
I don’t keep a hired maid and have a carpet on every
floor.”
Here she was interrupted by the sound of horses’ feet, and
rising up, grandma said, “I guess they’ve come. Will you
go and meet them?”
“Not I; I’m the last one to creep, I can tell you,” was
Aunt Betsey’s reply, while grandma and I quitted the room,
leaving her sitting bolt upright, with her feet on the fender
and her lips pursed up as they always were when she was
indignant.
30Uncle Joseph, Aunt Charlotte, Herbert Langley, had all
come, and as the latter leaped upon the ground and I
caught a sight of his tall, slender figure, I involuntarily
exclaimed, “Long-legs,” a cognomen, which he ever after
retained in our family. Shaking down his pants, he went
through with a kind of shuffle not wholly unlike the Highland
fling, ending his performance by kissing his hand to
the group of noses pressed close against the window-pane.
“I shall like him,” was my mental comment, as I turned
from him towards the bundle of clothes which Uncle Joseph
lifted from the sleigh and deposited upon the steps, and
which we supposed to be our dreaded aunt.
“This is perfectly horrible,” were the first words which
issued from under the folds of her veil; but to what she referred
I never knew.
We all knew and loved Uncle Joseph, and for his sake
my mother conquered whatever of prejudice she felt towards
his wife, who returned her cordial welcome with the extreme
end of her forefinger, saying, when asked to sit down, “I’ll
go to my room immediately, if you please.”
“Speak to the children first,” suggested my uncle, and
with a muttered, “It doesn’t matter,” the haughty lady
bowed coldly to us, as one by one we were presented.
When it came my turn, her small, black eyes rested
longer upon me, and the faintest derisive smile imaginable
curled the corners of her mouth. I knew that either my
cap or my face had provoked that smile, and with tears in
my eyes I was turning away, when Herbert Langley caught
me in his long arms, exclaiming, “And so, this is Rosa, the
poetess, I mean to call you little ‘Crop-head,’ may I?”
He referred, I suppose, to a letter which I had once written
in rhyme to my Uncle Joseph, but before, I could frame
any reply, his mother said, scornfully, “Don’t be flattered,
31child—Herbert calls everything poetry that rhymes. He’ll
learn to discriminate better as he grows older,” and with a
stately sweep she left the room, saying, as she reached the
rather steep and narrow stair-case, “Dear me—how funny—it’s
like mounting a ladder.”
While she was making her toilet we had an opportunity
of learning something of Herbert, who, whether he were so
or not, seemed much pleased with everything around him.
Occasionally, however, I doubted his sincerity, for when
Aunt Betsey was presented to him, he appeared quite as
much delighted with her as with anything else, drawing his
chair closely to her side, and asking her numberless questions
about the best modes of making cheese and raising
chickens, while all the time there was a peculiarly quizzical
expression in his eyes, which were dark and very handsome,
saving that the lids were too red to suit my ideas of beauty.
To Anna and her spit curls he took kindly, and ere his lady
mother made her appearance a second time he had put his
arm around her twice, telling her she should come to Boston
sometime and go to school. A rustle of silk upon the stairs
announced the descent of Aunt Charlotte, and with her nose
slightly elevated, ready for any emergency, she entered the
parlor, where she was introduced to Aunt Betsey, who,
courtesying straight down, “hoped to see her well,” adding,
that she “s’posed she’d come to the country to see how poor
folks lived.”
Falling back into the rocking-chair which Anna brought
for her, Aunt Charlotte made no particular reply, save an
occasional attack upon her hartshorn. Aunt Betsey, however,
nothing daunted, endeavored to engage her in conversation
by asking if “she knew Liza Ann Willcott, a tailoress
girl, that boarded with a Miss Johnson, who used to live in
Union, but who now lived in Boston.”
32Frowning majestically, Aunt Charlotte replied that she
had not the honor of Miss Willcott’s acquaintance, whereupon
Aunt Betsey advised her to make it by all means,
assuring her that “Liza Ann was a first rate girl, and that
Miss Johnson was the best kind of a neighbor, always willin’
to lend, or do a good turn”——
Here, with a haughty toss of her head, Aunt Charlotte
turned away and began talking in a low tone to Herbert, he
being the only one who, she seemed to think, was at all
worth noticing. It is strange how much constraint one person
can sometimes throw over a room full. On this occasion,
had an ogress suddenly alighted in our midst, we could
not have been more silent or less at ease than we were with
that Boston lady, sitting there so starched and stiff, her fat
hands folded one over the other, and the tips of her satin
gaiters just visible from beneath the ample folds of her rich
silk dress. Even Uncle Joseph, whose genial nature usually
shed so much sunlight over our circle, was grave and reserved,
rarely venturing a remark, or, if he did, glancing at
his wife to see if she approved it. Uncle Jason, who painfully
felt his own awkwardness, sat tipped back in his chair
against the wall, with his feet on the rounds, while his fingers
kept time to a tune, which he was evidently whistling
to himself. Glad were we all when finally called to dinner,
the savory smell of which had long been whetting our appetites.
“What! dinner so soon?” said Aunt Charlotte, consulting
her gold watch, which pointed to half-past two. “I
don’t believe I can force down a mouthful.”
But, spite of her belief, she did manage to make way with
the contents of her well-filled plate, which was passed back
a second time to be replenished. So eager were we all to
serve her that we partially forgot Aunt Betsey, who, after
33waiting awhile for a potato, at last arose, and reaching
half-way across the table, secured one for herself; saying,
by way of apology, that “she believed in looking out for
Number One, for if she didn’t nobody else would.”
So incensed was she with what she termed our neglect,
that the moment dinner was over she insisted upon going
home, saying, as she bade us good-bye, that “when she
went again where she wasn’t wanted, she gussed she should
know it;” and adding, while two big tears dropped from the
end of her nose, that “she never s’posed she should be so
misused by folks that she’d done so much for.”
The sight of her tears brought forth answering ones from
me, for, with all her peculiarities, I loved Aunt Betsey, and
I remembered that when sickness and death were among us,
she had left her own home to stay with us, ministering as
far as she was able to our comfort. Many a night had she
watched with me, and though she invariably placed the lamp
so that its rays glared full in my face, though she slept three-fourths
of the time, snoring so loudly as to keep me awake,
and though at the slightest change for the worse in my symptoms
she always routed the whole household, telling them,
“Rosa was dyin’ now, if she ever was,” thereby almost
frightening me to death, I knew that she meant well, and in
my heart I liked her far better than I did my Boston aunt,
who, after bidding her sister-in-law good-bye, went back to
the parlor, saying to her husband in a tone loud enough for
us to hear, “What a vulgar creature! Did you notice her
hands? Why, they are as coarse and black as a servant
girl’s.”
“And she’s none the worse for that,” interposed grandma,
warming up in the defence of her son’s wife. “She has now
and then an odd streak, but on the whole she’s better than
they’ll average.”
34After this, Aunt Charlotte relapsed into silence, which
she did not break until she overheard Herbert proposing to
Anna a ride on the morrow. Then she roused up, and while
her little black eyes snapped, she said, “I am going home
to-morrow afternoon, and so are you. Consequently,
there’ll be no time for a ride.”
In a twinkling, Herbert’s thumb and finger went up to his
nose, a gesture which I did not then understand, but it
struck me disagreeably, and had also the effect of silencing
Aunt Charlotte, who made no further remark on the subject
until they chanced to be alone, when I, who was in the hall,
heard her say, “What can induce you to talk so much with
that raw country girl? Your city friends would laugh well
if they knew it.”
Consigning his “city friends” to the care of the old gentleman
supposed to preside over the lower regions, Herbert
walked off in quest of the “raw country girl,” by whose side
he sat the remainder of the evening, talking to her so low
that Lizzie whispered to me her private opinion that “they
were courting.”
The next morning Aunt Charlotte did not appear at breakfast,
it being so much earlier than her usual hour of rising
that she felt wholly unequal to the task. Accordingly,
though we did not wait, the table did until ten o’clock,
when, pale and languid, she came down, seeming much disturbed
to find that Herbert had coaxed Anna into going
with him to call on Aunt Betsey, to whom he had taken
quite a fancy, and who had asked him to visit her “if he
didn’t feel too smart.”
Darting an angry glance at her husband, she said, “How
could you suffer it?” asking at the same time if there was a
hotel on the road. Being told that there was one at Union
and another half-way between that and Meadow Brook, she
35seemed more disturbed than ever, eating little or no breakfast,
and announcing her intention of staying over that day, or,
at all events, until Herbert returned. Seating herself at the
window, she watched and waited, while the hours crept on
and the clock in grandma’s room struck four ere the head
of “old Sorrel” was visible far down the road. Then with
an eagerness wholly incomprehensible to me, she started up,
straining her eyes anxiously in the direction of the fast approaching
cutter. As it came nearer we all observed something
rather singular in the position of Herbert, who seemed
lying almost across Anna’s lap, while she was driving!
“Merciful Heavens! it’s as I feared!” was Aunt Charlotte’s
exclamation, as she sank upon the lounge, moaning
bitterly, and covering her face with the cushion, that she
might not see the disgrace of her only son—for Herbert was
drunk!
Lifting him out, my father and uncle laid him upon the
settee in the sitting-room, just where little Jamie had been
laid, and my mother, as she looked upon the senseless inebriate
resting where once had lain the beautiful, inanimate
form of her youngest born, thought how far less bitter was
her cup of sorrow than was that of the half fainting woman,
who would rather, far rather, her boy had died with the dew
of babyhood upon his brow than to have seen him thus debased
and fallen.
The story was soon told, my uncle supplying all points
which Anna could not. It seems that early in life Herbert
had acquired a love for the wine and porter which daily
graced his mother’s dinner-table. As he grew older his taste
increased for something stronger, until now nothing save
brandy could satisfy the cravings of his appetite. More
than once had he been brought home in a state of entire
unconsciousness, for he was easily intoxicated, it usually
36taking but one glass to render him perfectly foolish, while a
second was generally sure to finish the work. These drunken
fits were always followed by resolutions of amendment,
and it was now so long since he had drank that his mother
began to have strong hopes of his reform, but these, alas!
were now dashed to the ground. Unfortunately, Uncle
Jason had offered the young man a glass of cider, which immediately
awoke in its full vigor his old love for ardent
spirits. Just across the road, creaking in the November
wind, hung the sign of the “Golden Fleece,” and in that direction,
soon after dinner, Herbert bent his steps, taking
down at one time a tumbler two thirds full of raw brandy.
This made him very talkative and very affectionate, insomuch
that he kissed Aunt Betsey, who, as soon as she could,
started him for home. When the half-way house, called in
opposition to its neighbor “Silver Skin,” was reached, Herbert
insisted upon stopping and taking another glass, which ere
long rendered him so helpless that Anna was obliged to take
charge of Sorrel herself, while her companion fell asleep,
leaning his head upon her shoulder and gradually sinking
lower and lower until he rested in her lap.
All that night he remained in the sitting-room, which in
the morning presented so sorry and disgusting an appearance
that when Aunt Charlotte for the hundredth time
wished she had never come to Meadow Brook, our whole
family mentally responded a fervent Amen. Herbert, when
fully restored to consciousness, seemed heartily ashamed of
himself, crying like a girl, and winding his arms around his
mother’s neck so affectionately that I did not blame her
when she forgave him and wiped away her tears.
She might not have had much faith in his sincerity could
she have heard his conversation with Anna, whom he managed
to withdraw from the family to the recess of a distant
37window. Alone with her, his manner changed, and with
flashing eyes, he charged it to his mother, who, he said, first
taught him to love it by allowing him, when a little boy, to
drink the bottom of the wine glasses after dinner.
“And if I fill a drunkard’s grave,” said he, “she will be
to blame; but,” he added, as he saw Anna involuntarily
shudder, “it shall not be. I can reform. I will reform, and
you must help me do it.”
Anna looked wonderingly at him, while he continued, taking
her hand and removing from it a plain gold ring, which
grandma had given her on her fifteenth birthday, “You
must let me wear this as a talisman to protect me from evil.
Whenever I am tempted I shall look at it and be saved.”
Anna hesitated awhile, but the soft, handsome eyes of
Herbert Langley had woven around her a spell she could
not break, and at last she consented, receiving from him in
return a diamond ring, which he told her was worth two
hundred dollars. When this became known to mother
she very wisely insisted on Anna’s returning it, and together
with the note explaining the why and the wherefore it went
back to its owner, who immediately replied by a letter, the
contents of which were carefully kept from us all. The effect,
however, was plainly visible; for, from the time of its
receipt we lost our merry, light-hearted sister, and in her place
there moved among us a sober, listless girl, whom grandma
called foolish, and whom Charlie pronounced “lovesick.”
Herbert’s letter was soon answered, but when Anna requested
my father to put it in the P. O. he refused, telling
her “she should not correspond with such a drunken dog.”
Possibly it was wrong in him thus to address her, for kind
words and persuasive arguments might have won her to
reason, but now a spirit of opposition was roused—“Herbert
was wronged—misunderstood”—so Anna thought, and the
38letter which father refused to take, was conveyed by other
hands, a postscript longer than the letter itself being first
added.
After this there was no more trouble. Anna wrote regularly
to Herbert, who promptly responded; his missives
always being directed to one of Anna’s schoolmates, who
was just romantic enough to think her companion persecuted!
Gradually I was let into the secret, and was occasionally
employed to carry Anna’s notes to and from the house of her
friend. I did not then consider the great wrong I was doing,
but since I have shed many a bitter tear to think that
I in any way helped to work my sister’s ruin.
CHAPTER III. COUSIN WILL.
39
If so far as the golden Californian land this book of
mine shall reach, it may, perchance, fall into the hands of
some who, from their number, can select the veritable hero,
the “Cousin Will” of my story. If so, I would ask them
to think as leniently as possible of his faults, herein
recorded, for the moustached Will of California, whose
generous conduct wins the love of all, is hardly the same
wild, mischievous boy, who once kept our home in a perpetual
state of excitement.
The tears were scarcely yet dried, which he had shed
over his mother’s coffin, when he came to us, and in one
corner of his green, oval trunk, there lay a tress of soft
brown hair, which he had severed from that mother’s head.
He was the son of my mother’s only sister, who, on her
death-bed had committed him to the guardianship of my
father, asking him to deal gently with her wayward boy,
for beneath his faulty exterior there lay a mine of excellence,
which naught save words of love could fathom.
Without meaning to be so, perhaps, my father was a stern
reserved man, never seeking the confidence of his children
whose real characters he did not understand. It is true he
loved us—provided for all our wants, and, as far as possible,
strove to make us what the children of a New England
40Presbyterian deacon ought to be; but he seldom petted us,
and if Carrie, with her sunny face and chestnut curls, sometimes
stole up behind him and twined her chubby arms
around his neck, he seemed ashamed to return her caress
unless they were alone. Brother Charlie he looked upon as
almost incorrigible, but if he found it hard to cope with his
bold, fun-loving spirit, it was tenfold more difficult for him
to tame the mischievous Will, whom scarcely any one could
manage, but who, strange to say, was a general favorite.
It was night when he reached Meadow Brook, and I was
in bed, but through the closed doors I caught the sound of
his voice, and in an instant I experienced a sensation of
delight, as if in him I should find a kindred spirit. I could
not wait until morning before I saw him, and, rising softly, I
groped my way down the dark stairway to a knot-hole,
which had more than once done me service when sent from
the room while my mother and her company told something
I was not to hear! He was sitting so that the light of the
lamp fell full upon his face, which, with its high, white
brow, hazel eyes, and mass of wavy hair, seemed to me the
most beautiful I had ever seen. Involuntarily I thought of
my own plain features, and saying to myself, “He’ll never
like me, never,” I crept back to bed, wondering if it were true
that homely little girls made sometimes handsome women.
The next morning, wishing to produce as favorable
an impression as possible, I was an unusually long time
making my toilet—trying on one dress after another, and
finally deciding upon a white cambric I never wore
except to church, or on some similar occasion. Giving an
extra brush to my hair, which had grown out darker and so
very curly that Charley called me “Snarly-pate,” I started
for the breakfast-room, where the family were already
assembled.
41“What upon earth has the child got on?” was grandma’s
exclamation as she looked at me, both over and under her
glasses, while mother bade me “go straight back and
change my dress,” asking “why I had put on my very
best?”
“Settin’ her cap for Bill, I guess,” suggested Charlie, who,
boy-like, was already on terms of great intimacy with his
cousin.
More angry than grieved, I went back to my room, where
I pouted for half an hour or more. Then, selecting the
worst looking dress I had, I again descended to the dining-room
where Charlie presented me to Will, telling him at
the same time “to spare all comments on my appearance,
as it made me madder than a March hare to be called
ugly.”
“I don’t think she’s ugly. Anyway I like her looks,”
said Will, smiling down upon me with those eyes which
have since made many a heart beat as mine did then, for
’twas the first compliment of the kind I had ever received.
Will had always lived in the city, and now, anxious to
see the lions of the country at once, he proposed to Charlie
a ramble over the farm, inviting me to accompany them,
which I did willingly, notwithstanding that Charlie muttered
something about “not wanting a gal stuck along.”
In the pasture we came across “old Sorrel,” whom Will
said he would ride as they did in a circus, if Charlie would
only catch him. This was an easy task, for Sorrel, suspecting
no evil, came up to us quite readily, when Will, leaping
upon his back, commenced whooping and hallooing so
loudly that Sorrel’s mettle was up, and for nearly an hour
he ran quite as fast as his rider could wish. But circus
riding was not Sorrel’s forte, and he probably grew dizzy,
for he at length stumbled and fell, injuring his fore foot in
42some way, so that, to our dismay, we found he was unable
to walk without a great effort.
“Je-mi-my! Won’t the old gentleman rare!” said
Charlie, who was never very choice of his language.
Will, on the contrary, seemed more concerned for the
horse, bringing water in his hat, and bathing the fast-swelling
limb of the poor animal, who appeared to be grateful
for the kindness. Charlie proposed that we should keep it
a secret, but to this Will would not listen, and in a plain,
straightforward way he confessed what he had done, and
father, who saw that Sorrel was temporarily injured, forgave
him, for he could not resist the pleading of Will’s
dark eyes.
This was his first day’s adventure—the next one was a
little different. Finding a cow in the lane, he tried the experiment
of milking, succeeding so well that when at night
Sally came in with her half filled pail, she declared that
“Line-back was drying up, for she’d only given a drop or
so.” For this and numerous other misdemeanors Will also
received absolution, but when on the second Sabbath after
his arrival he and Charlie both were missed from church,
whither they had started a full half hour before the rest of
our family, father grew fidgety, holding his hymn book
wrong side up, and sitting, instead of standing, during the
prayer, a thing he was never known to do before. He was
very strict in the observance of the fourth commandment,
as indeed were most of the citizens of Meadow Brook, it being
an almost State Prison offence to stay away from church
on the Sabbath, or speak above a whisper until after sunset.
By the way, I think it a mistake, this converting the Sabbath
into a day so much to be dreaded by the youthful, fun-loving
members of the family, who are not yet old enough
43to see the propriety of having in reserve a Sunday face, as
well as a Sunday gown. I would not have that sacred day
profaned, but I would have it divested of that gloom with
which it is too often associated in the child’s mind. I would
have everything connected with it as cheerful and pleasant
as possible, and in these days of Sabbath schools and Sabbath
school-books, it seems an easy matter to make it “The
day of all the week the best.” I well remember one rainy
Sunday, when the whole family were obliged to remain at
home, the younger ones reciting the Catechism to grandma,
committing to memory and repeating to mother ten verses
of the fifth chapter of Matthew, and then being compelled
to sit up stiff and straight while father read to us a long metaphysical
sermon, which he interspersed and lengthened out
with remarks of his own, among which was the consoling one
that “Heaven was one eternal Sabbath.”
This was too much for Charlie, whose mind, instead of
dwelling on the words of the good divine, was sadly wandering
towards a nest of young white pigs, only that morning
born. Turning towards me with a most rueful face, he whispered,
“Darned if I’ll go there. I’ll run away first.”
Of course I laughed aloud—how could I help it; and on
my saying that “Charlie made me,” we were both ordered
from the room in disgrace, which latter we bore manfully—Charlie
going straight to his pigs, while I stole up garret to
a big candle-box, where, on one of my old dresses, lay sleeping
six beautiful kittens.
But I am wandering from my subject, which was the time
when Will and Charlie were missing from church, and when,
to his utter astonishment, father learned that they had gone
to the consecration of a Roman Catholic church, which had
recently been erected a little out of the village, on an eminence,
where its white cross could be seen from every point.
44Against the Catholics as a religious denomination my father
was prejudiced, and when he ascertained that his son,
born of orthodox parents, and baptized in the orthodox
faith, had not only run away to their church, but had also
paid twenty-five cents, the price of admission, he was a good
deal excited, and for a deacon showed considerable temper.
It was, of course, Will’s doings, he having coaxed
Charlie to go by telling him of the wonderful sights there
were to be seen.
At a late hour they came home, loitering around the barn
a long time before they ventured into the presence of my
father, whom my grandmother had somewhat appeased by
telling him that “boys must sow their wild oats sometime,
and it wasn’t best to be too strict with ’em, for it only made
’em act worse,” adding that “the Catholics were not the
worst folks in the world, and they had just as much right to
their form of worship as we had to ours.” This in a measure
mollified him, and consequently the two boys only received
a long lecture, and were debarred the privilege of going to
the village, except on Sundays, for three weeks, a punishment
which annoyed Will exceedingly. But nothing could
subdue him, and the moment the three weeks had expired
he was as ready for mischief as ever. For a long time the
coming of a Circus had been heralded by flaming handbills
in red and yellow, one of which Will plastered onto our
great barn door, from which conspicuous post it was removed
by my father, who conscientiously turned his back upon men
and women riding on their heads, declaring it an outrage
upon all rules of propriety, and denouncing circuses and circus-going
people as utterly low and vulgar. Thus from my
earliest remembrance had I been taught, and still my heart
would throb faster, whenever, with the beat of the drum
and the sound of the bugle, the long procession swept past
45our door, and more than once had I stolen to the top of the
hill, whence could be seen the floating banner and swaying
canvas, watching from afar the evil I dared not approach.
Great, then, was my surprise, when, on the morning of
the eventful day, Will suggested that Charlie, John, Lizzie,
and I should run away in the evening and visit the “doings,”
as he called it. I was shocked that he should propose my going
to such a place. “It was low and vulgar,” I told him,
“and no one went there but loafers and rowdies.”
But he assured me that I was mistaken, saying that “some
of our most respectable people attended;” and then he wondered
“how I was ever to know anything unless I once in a
while went to a circus, or a theatre, or something. It was
perfectly ridiculous,” he said, “for father to keep us so cooped
up at home. Nobody else did so. There was Lawyer
Smith’s daughter, and Judge Brown’s niece in Albany, who
always went, and if it didn’t hurt them, it wouldn’t me.”
Thus Will reasoned, persuading me at last; and just at
dark, Lizzie and I, on pretence of going to bed early, went
to our room, dressed ourselves in our best, I donning the
white cambric, which I had worn on the first day of Will’s
arrival, and then when we were ready, got out upon the
roof of the woodshed, which came up under our window,
descending thence by means of a ladder which Will and
Charlie brought from the barn. I had the utmost confidence
in Will, and yet as I drew near the tent, and saw the rabble,
whose appearance fully equalled my father’s description,
I wished myself away. Just then the band inside struck up,
and giving my fears to the winds, I pressed forward, once
involuntarily turning my head aside, as I heard a man near
the door exclaim, “Deacon Lee’s children, as I live! Is the
world coming an end?”
Instantly my face flushed, for I felt that injustice was done
46to my father, and my first impulse was to exonerate him
from all blame by explaining that we had run away; but ere
I could do so Will pulled me along, and in a moment we
were in the close, heated atmosphere of the vast arena,
where were congregated more than a thousand people, of all
ages and conditions. I was confounded, for it seemed to me
that each and every one was pointing towards us the finger
of scorn, and never since have I felt so wholly degraded and
ashamed as I did at the moment of my first entrance to a
circus!
We had been but a short time seated, when Will, who
had divined my feelings, nudged my elbow, and pointing
towards a group just entering, said, “See, there’s ’Squire
Talbot, his wife and daughter, Dr. Griffin, and lots more
of Meadow Brook aristocracy. Now, ain’t you glad you
came?”
It was as he said, and as I saw the above mentioned
individuals, some of them professors of religion, and all of
them people of the first standing in town, I can scarcely tell
how I felt. It was a sensation of mingled pleasure, bewilderment,
and perplexity. Could it be that, after all, my father
was wrong, that he was too strict with us, debarring us
from innocent amusements, for if it were proper for members
of the church to frequent such places, why was it not for
me? Now, I can answer promptly that my father was
right, wholly right, but I was puzzled then, and gradually
I began to care less for being there, and to have less fear
of what father would say when he found it out. I was
growing very brave, entrenching myself behind the bad
example of those who little suspected the harm their presence
was doing. Father did not know the ways of the
world, I thought, but after being enlightened by me, I was
sure he would become a convert at once, and possibly at
47the next circus he would be in attendance, but from this
last idea I involuntarily shrank, thinking I could never
respect him again, were he guilty of such a thing.
I enjoyed it vastly, all except the riding of the girl, who
I fancied had on her little sister’s dress, and when she came
out I looked for a place where to hide my head; but hearing
the spectators cheer louder than ever, I cast furtive glances
at those around me, discovering to my amazement that they
seemed more delighted with her than with anything else;
while, to crown all, I heard Will telling a young man, that
“she was a splendid rider, that he never saw but one who
could beat her, and that was a girl in Albany.” Then
turning to Lizzie, he asked if she would not like to ride in
that way?
With an involuntary shudder I threw my arm around my
sister, as if to protect her from what I felt would be worse
than a thousand deaths. Gradually there was dawning
upon my mind the suspicion that a circus after all was not
exactly the school for pure young girls, and I felt that not
all the wealth of the Indies could tempt me to fill the post
that that rider did. Towards the other actors I was more
lenient, thinking that if ever I joined the circus, I should
surely be the clown, whose witty speeches amused me greatly,
for I did not then know that they were all made up beforehand,
and that what he said to us to-day he would say to
others on the morrow. Mlle. Glaraine was just finishing
up her performance by riding around the circle without
other support than the poising of one foot on a man’s
shoulder, when who should appear but our father!
He had missed Will and Charlie from family prayers, and
had traced them as far as the pavilion, where the fee-receiver
demanded a quarter ere he would allow him to
enter. It was in vain that father tried to explain matters,
48saying, “he never attended a circus in his life, and what
was more never should; he’d only come for two boys who
had run away.”
The doorkeeper was incorrigible; “he’d seen just as honest
looking men,” he said, “who were the greatest cheats in
the world, and if father wanted to go in, he could do so by
paying the usual fee; if not, he must budge.”
Finding there was no alternative, father yielded, and then
made his way into the tent, scanning with his keen grey
eyes the sea of faces until he singled out Charlie, who was
so absorbed in stamping and hallooing at Mlle. Glaraine’s
leaping through a hoop, that he never dreamed of father’s
presence until a rough hand was laid upon his shoulder, and
a stern voice demanded of him why he was there?
Perfectly thunderstruck, Charlie started to his feet with
the exclamation of “Je-ru-sa-lem!” but before he could make
any explanation father discovered Lizzie and me. ’Twas
the first suspicion he had of our being there, and now,
when he saw us, he turned pale, and reeled as if smitten by
a heavy blow. Had he felled me to the earth it would have
hurt me less than did the expression of his face and the
tones of his voice, as he said, “You, too, Rosa! I never
thought you would thus deceive me.”
I began to cry aloud; so did Lizzie, and in this way we
made our exit from the circus, followed by Charlie, John,
and Will, the latter of whom, the moment we were in the
open air, began to take the blame all to himself, saying, as
was very true, that we never would have thought of going
but for him, and suggesting that he alone should be
punished, as he was the one most in fault. I thought
this was very magnanimous in Will, and I looked up in
father’s face to see how it affected him, but the moonlight
was obscure, and I could discover nothing, though the hand
49that held mine trembled violently. I presume he thought
that in this case corporal punishment would be of no avail,
for we received none, but in various ways were we made
to feel that we had lost the confidence of the family. For
four long weeks we were each night locked into our rooms,
while for the same length of time we were kept from school,
Lizzie and I reciting our lessons to our mother, while Will,
Charlie, and John, to use their own words, “worked from
morning until night, like niggers.”
But the worst part of it all was the temporary disgrace
which our act of disobedience brought upon father. A half
drunken fellow, who saw him enter the tent, and who knew
that we were there, hurried away to the village with the
startling intelligence that “Deacon Lee and all his family
were at the circus.”
The news spread like wildfire, gathering strength in its
progress, until by the time it reached us it was a current
report that not only was father at the circus, but grandma
too! This was more than the old lady could bear. Sixty-nine
years had she lived without ever having had a word
breathed against her morals, and now, just as her life’s sun
was setting, to have such a thing laid to her charge was
too much, and she actually worried herself into a fever,
which confined her to the house for several weeks.
After this adventure it became a serious question in
father’s mind as to what he should do with Will, who kept
our heretofore quiet household in a state of perpetual
excitement. Nothing seemed to have the least effect upon
him save the mention of his mother, and that for the time
being would subdue him, but when temptation came, he
invariably yielded, and Charlie, who was an apt scholar,
was pretty sure to follow where his wild, dashing cousin
led. There was scarcely any boyish vice to which Will
50was not more or less addicted, and “Deacon Lee’s sons,”
who had often been held up as patterns for their companions,
began soon to prove the old adage true, that “evil communications
corrupt good manners.”
John learned to handle an oath quite fluently, while
Charlie was one Sunday morning discovered playing euchre
with Will on the hay loft, where they kept their cards
hidden. But all this was nothing compared to the night
when both the boys were brought home so intoxicated that
neither of them was able to stand alone or speak! They
had been to a “raising,” where the brandy bottle circulated
freely, Will, as a matter of course, drinking from the beginning.
Charlie, however, hesitated until they taunted him
with “being afraid of the old deacon,” daring him “to
drink and be a man.” Then he yielded, and with fiendish pleasure
the crowd gathered around, urging him on, until he was
undeniably drunk; after which they chuckled with delight as
they wondered what the “blue Presbyterian” would say.
We were sitting down to supper when they brought him
home, and the moment mother saw him, she darted forward,
exclaiming, “Is he dead? Tell me, is my boy dead?”
“Yes, dead—drunk,” answered the man, with a cold,
ironical sneer at her distress.
He was used to it, for of five noble sons who once called
him their father, four slept in a drunkard’s grave, and the
fifth had far better have been there than the wreck he was.
My father had risen from his seat, but at the words “he is
drunk,” he dropped upon the floor as if scathed with the
lightning’s stroke. You who think it a light matter—the
holding of the wine-cup to the lips of your neighbor’s child—you
should have seen my father that night, as moan after
moan of anguish came from his pale lips, while the great
drops of perspiration stood thickly upon his forehead and
51about his mouth. The effect it had upon him was terrible;
crushing him to the earth, and weaving in among his
hitherto brown locks more than one thread of silver. Once
when Charlie was with me, I heard him in the barn, praying
that the promise of a covenant God might be remembered
towards him, and that his son might yet be saved. Charlie’s
feelings were touched, and dropping on his knees at my side
he made a solemn vow that never again should ardent
spirits of any kind pass his lips; and God, who heard that
vow mingled with my father’s prayer, registered it in
Heaven, and from that day to this, amid all the temptations
which come to early manhood, it has been unbroken.
Not thus easily could Will be reached. His was the
sorrow of a day, which passed away with the coming of
to-morrow’s sun, and after a long consultation, it was
decided that he should go to sea, and the next merchantman
bound for the East Indies, which sailed from Boston,
bore on its deck, as a common sailor, our cousin Will, who
went from us reluctantly, for to him there was naught but
terror, toil, and fear in “a life on the ocean wave.” But
there was no other way to save him, they said, and so with
bitter grief at our hearts, we bade adieu to the wayward
boy, praying that God would give the winds and waves
charge concerning him, and that no danger might befall him
when afar on the rolling billow.
CHAPTER IV. THE SCHOOLMISTRESS.
52
Of the many thousand individuals destined to become
the purchasers of a copy of this work, a majority have
undoubtedly been, or are still teachers, and of these many
will remember the time when they fancied that to be
invested with the dignity of a teacher was to secure the
greatest amount of happiness which earth can bestow.
Almost from my earliest remembrance it had been the one
great subject which engrossed my thoughts, and frequently,
when strolling down the shady hill-side which led to our
schoolhouse, have I fancied myself the teacher, thinking
that if such were really the case, my first act should be the
chastisement of half a score or more boys, who were in the
daily habit of annoying me in various ways. Every word
and action of my teacher, too, was carefully noted and laid
away against the time when I should need them, and which
came much sooner than I anticipated; for one rainy morning
when Lizzie and I were playing in the garret, I overheard
my father saying there was a chance for Rosa to
teach school.
“What, that child!” was my mother’s exclamation, but
ere he could reply, “the child” had bounded down two
pair of stairs, and stood at his elbow, asking, “Who is it?—Where
53is it?—And do you suppose I can get a certificate?”
This last idea damped my ardor somewhat, for horrible
visions came up before me, of the “Abbreviations” and
“Sounds of the Vowels,” in both of which I was rather
deficient.
“You teach school! You look like it!” said my sister
Juliet. “Why, in less than three days, you’d be teetering
with the girls, if indeed you didn’t climb trees with the
boys.”
This climbing was undeniably a failing of mine, there
being scarcely a tree on the farm on whose topmost limbs I
hadn’t at some time or other been perched; but I was older
now. I was thirteen two days before, and so I reminded Juliet,
at the same time begging of father to tell me all about it.
It appeared that he had that day met with a Mr. Randall,
the trustee of Pine District, who was in quest of a teacher.
After learning that the school was small, father ventured to
propose me, who, he said, “was crazy to keep school.”
“A dollar a week is the most we can give her,” returned
Mr. Randall, “and if you’ll take up with that, mebby we’ll
try her. New beginners sometimes do the best.”
So it was arranged that I was to teach fifteen weeks for
four dollars per month and board round at that! Boarding
round! How many reminiscences do these two words recall
to those who, like myself, have tried it, and who know that
it has a variety of significations. That sometimes it is only
another name for sleeping with every child in the family
where your home for one week may chance to be—for how
can you be insensible to the oft-repeated whisper, “I shall
sleep with her to-night—ma said I might;” and of “ma’s”
audible answer, “Perhaps, sis, she don’t want you to.”
If “sis” is a clean, chubby-looking little creature, you do54want her; but if, as it not unfrequently happens, she is just the
opposite,——I draw a blank which almost every country
teacher in the land can fill, merely saying that there is
no alternative. We have got the district to please and we
must do it some way or other.
Again, “boarding round” means a quiet, cozy spot,
where everything is so pleasant and cheerful, where the
words are so kind and the smile of welcome so sweet, that
you feel at once at home, and wish, oh, how you do wish,
you could stay there all the summer long; but it cannot
be;—the time of your allotted sojourn passes away, and
then with a sigh, if indeed you can repress a tear, you
gather up your combs, brushes, and little piece of embroidery,
to which some spiteful woman has said “you
devote more time than to your school,” and putting them in
your sachel, depart for another home, sometimes as pleasant
as the one you are leaving, sometimes not.
But of these annoyances I knew nothing, and when Mr.
Randall came to see me, calling me Miss Lee, and when I
was really engaged, my happiness was complete. In a
country neighborhood every item of news, however slight,
spreads rapidly, and the fact that I was to teach soon
became generally known, creating quite a sensation, and
operating differently upon different natures. One old gentleman,
who, times innumerable, had held me on his knee,
feeding my vanity with flattery, and my stomach with sweetmeats,
was quite as much delighted as I, declaring, “he always
knew I was destined to make something great.”
Dear old man! When the snows of last winter were high
piled upon the earth, they dug for him a grave in the frozen
ground, and in the world where now he lives, he will not
know, perhaps, that I shall never fulfill his prophecy.
Aunt Sally Wright, who, besides managing her own affairs,
55kept an eye on her neighbors’, and who looked upon
me as a “pert, forward piece,” gave her opinion freely.
“What! That young one keep school! Is Deacon Lee
crazy? Ain’t Rose stuck up enough now? But never
mind. You’ll see she won’t keep out more’n half her time,
if she does that.”
Aunt Sally was gifted with the power of telling fortunes
by means of tea-grounds, and I have always fancied she
read that prediction in the bottom of her big blue cup, for
how could she otherwise have known what actually happened!
Ere long the news reached Pine District, creating quite an
excitement, the older people declaring “they’d never send
to a little girl,” while the juvenile portion of the inhabitants
gave a contemptuous whistle or so in honor of the school
ma’am elect. Mrs. Capt. Thompson, who boasted the biggest
house, handsomest carpet and worst boy in Pine Hill,
was wholly incredulous, until she one day chanced to meet
with Aunt Sally, who not only confirmed it, but also kindly
gave her many little items touching my character as a “wild,
romping minx, who was no more qualified for a teacher than
for the Queen of England,” citing as proof of what she said,
that only the year before she had seen me “trying to ride
on a cow.”
Mrs. Capt. Thompson, who was blessed with an overwhelming
sense of propriety, was greatly shocked, saying
“she’d always thought Mr. Randall knew just enough to
hire a child,” and consoling herself with the remark that “it
was not at all probable I’d get a certificate.”
On this point I was myself a little fearful. True, I had
been “sent away” to school, and had been flattered into the
belief that I possessed far more book knowledge than I did;
but this, I knew, would avail me nothing with the formidable
committee who held my destiny in their hands. They56were unbiased in my favor, and had probably never heard
of me, as they lived in an adjoining town. But “where
there’s a will there’s a way,” and determining not to fail, I
ransacked the cupboard, where our school-books were kept,
bringing thence Olney’s Geography, Colburn’s Arithmetic,
History of the United States, Grammars, etc., all of which were
for days my constant companions, and I even slept with one
or more of them under my pillow, so that with the earliest
dawn I could study. Whole pages of Geography were committed
to memory, all the hardest problems in Colburn were
solved, a dozen or more of compound relatives were parsed and
disposed of to my satisfaction at least, and I was just beginning
to feel strong in my own abilities, when one Monday
morning news was brought us that at three o’clock that afternoon
all who were intending to teach in the town
of S—— were to meet at the house of the Rev. Mr. Parks, then
and there to be questioned of what they knew and what
they didn’t know. This last referred to me, for now that the
dreaded day had come, I felt that every idea had suddenly left
me, while, to increase my embarrassment, I was further informed
that as there had the year previous been some trouble
among the School Inspectors, each of whom fancied that the
other did not take his share of the work, the town had this
year thought to obviate the difficulty by electing nine!
One was bad enough, but at the thought of nine men in
spectacles my heart sank within me, and it was some time
ere I could be persuaded to make the trial. In the midst
of our trouble, Aunt Sally, whose clothes on Monday mornings
were always swinging on the line before light, and who
usually spent the afternoon of that day in visiting, came in,
and after learning what was the cause of my flushed cheeks,
said, by way of comforting me, that “she didn’t wonder an
atom if I felt streaked, for ’twant no ways likely I’d pass!”
57This roused my pride, and with the mental comment that
“I’d pass for all her,” I got myself in readiness, Juliet
lending me her green veil, and Anna her fine pocket handkerchief,
while mother’s soft warm shawl was wrapped lovingly
about me, and Lizzie slipped into my pocket the Multiplication
Table, which she thought I might manage to look at
slily in case of an emergency. On our way father commenced
the examination by asking me the length of the
Mississippi, but I didn’t know as it had a length, and in despair
he gave up his questioning.
Oh, how sombre and dreary seemed the little parlor into
which we were ushered by the servant, who, on learning our
business, looked rather doubtfully at me, as much as to say,
“You surely can’t be one of them?” In a short time the
parlor was filled, the entire nine being there. Not one was
absent, and in a row directly opposite, they sat, some tipped
back in a lounging attitude, some cutting their finger nails
with their penknives, while others sat up stiff and stern, the
whole presenting a most formidable appearance. There
were eight or ten candidates present, and unfortunately for
me, I was seated at what I called the foot of the class. It
seemed that the most of them were acquainted, and as I was
almost the only stranger present, it was but natural that
they should look at me rather more that I liked. My pantalets
evidently attracted their attention, but by dint of
drawing up my feet and pushing down my dress I hoped to
hide my short-comings.
When, at last, the examination commenced, I found, to my
great delight, that Geography was the subject introduced,
and my heart beat high, for I thought of the pages I could
repeat and ardently longed for a chance to display! Unfortunately
for me they merely questioned us from the map,
and breathlessly I awaited my turn. At length the young
58lady who sat next to me was asked “What two rivers
unite and form the Ohio?” I looked at her sidewise. The
bloom deepened on her cheek, and I was sure she had forgotten.
Involuntarily I felt tempted to tell her, but did
not, and Mr. Parks, looking inquiringly at me, said, “Perhaps
the next one can. Ahem!”
He caught sight of my offending pantalets, and thinking
me some child who had come with her sister, was about to
pass me by. But I was not to be slighted in that way, particularly
when I knew the answer; so, with the air of one
who, always at the foot, accidently spells a word right and
starts for the head, I spoke out loud and distinctly “Alleghany
and Monongahela,” glancing at my father just in time
to catch a nod of encouragement.
“The Nine” were taken by surprise, and instantly three
pair of eyes with glasses and six pair without glasses were
brought to bear upon me. For reasons best known to
themselves, they asked me a great variety of questions, all
of which I answered correctly, I believe; at least they made
no comment, and were evidently vastly amused with their
new specimen, asking me how old I was, and exchanging
smiles at my reply, “Thirteen, four weeks ago to-day.” One
of my fellow-teachers, who sat near me, whispered to her
next neighbor, “She’s older than that, I know;” for which
remark I’ve never quite forgiven her. Arithmetic was the
last branch introduced, and as mathematics was rather my
forte, I had now no fears of failing—but I did! A question
in Decimals puzzled me, and coloring to my temples, I
replied “I don’t know,” while two undeniable tears dropped
into my lap.
“Never mind, sis,” said one of the nine. “You know
most everything else, and have done bravely.”
I was as sure of my certificate then as I was fifteen minutes
59afterwards, when a little slip of paper was given me,
declaring me competent to teach a common school. I
thought it was all over, and was adjusting mother’s shawl
and tying on Juliet’s veil, when they asked me to write
something that they might see a specimen of my penmanship.
Taking the pen, I dashed off with a flourish “Rosa
Lee,” at which I thought they peered more curiously than
need be—and one of them, Dr. Clayton, a young man, and a
handsome one, too, said something about its being “very
poetical.” He hadn’t seen the negro song then.
The shadows of evening had long since fallen when we
stopped at our door, where we found mother anxiously
waiting for us. Very wistfully she looked in my face ere she
asked the important question.
“Yes, I’ve got one,” said I, bounding from the buggy,
“and I’d like to be examined every day, it’s such fun.”
“Didn’t you miss a word?” asked Juliet.
“Oh, I’m so glad!” cried Lizzie.
“Feel big, don’t you?” suggested Charlie, while Anna inquired
“if I’d lost her pocket handkerchief!”
CHAPTER V. PINE HILL.
60
Ere long, exaggerated rumors reached Meadow Brook of the
very creditable manner in which I had acquitted myself at the
examination, whereupon Aunt Sally Wright was quite taken
aback. Soon rallying, however, she had recourse to her
second prediction, which was that “I should not teach more
than half the summer out.” Perhaps I wrong the old lady,
but I cannot help thinking that the ill-natured stories concerning
myself, which she set afloat at Pine Hill, were in a
great measure the cause of her prophecy being fulfilled.
Never before, to my knowledge, had she visited at Capt.
Thompson’s, but now she spent an entire day there, bringing
back to us the intelligence that John Thompson, a boy
just one year my senior, was going to stay at home that
summer, as “Miss Cap’n Thompson hadn’t no idee I could
teach him.”
Added to this was the comforting assurance, that “Cap’n
Thompson was hoppin’ mad because Mr. Randall had hired me
in preference to his sister Dell, who had herself applied for the
school.” This, as I afterwards learned, was the secret of
the dislike which, from the first, the Thompsons entertained
for me. They had no daughter, but the captain’s half sister
Dell had lived with him ever since his marriage, and between
61her and their hopeful son John, the affections of himself and
wife were nearly equally divided.
Dell Thompson was a proud, overbearing girl, about
eighteen years of age, who esteemed herself far better than
her neighbors, with whom she seldom associated, her acquaintances
living mostly at what was called “the Centre”
of the town. It seems that she had applied for the summer
school, but remembering that she had once called him
a “country clown and his wife ignorant and vulgar,” Mr.
Randall had refused her and accepted me. Notwithstanding
that the people of Pine Hill generally disliked the
Thompsons, there was among them a feeling of dissatisfaction
when it became known that I was preferred to Dell,
who, they thought, would have given tone and character to
the school, for “it wasn’t every big bug who would stoop to
teach.”
Of this state of affairs I was fortunately ignorant, and
never do I remember a happier morning than that on which
I first took upon myself the responsibilities of a teacher. By
sunrise, the little hair trunk, which grandma lent me, was
packed and stood waiting on the doorstep, where I had
carried it, thinking thus to accelerate the movements of my
father, who did not seem to be in any particular hurry, telling
me, “he’d no idea that school would be commenced before
we got there!” Grandma had suggested the propriety of
letting down my dresses, a movement which I warmly
seconded, but mother said “No, she did not like to see little
girls dressed like grown up women;” so, in my new plaid
gingham and white pantalets, I waited impatiently until the
clock struck seven, at which time father announced himself
ready.
“When will you come home?” asked mother, as she followed
me to the gate.
62“In three weeks,” was my reply, as I bounded into the
buggy, which soon moved away.
Pine Hill is not all remarkable for its beautiful scenery,
and as old Sorrel trotted leisurely along, down one
steep hill and up another, through a haunted swamp, where
a man had once, to his great terror, seen his departed wife,
and over a piece of road, where the little grassy ridges said,
as plain as grassy ridges could say, that the travellers
there were few and far between, my spirits lowered
a little. But, anon, the prospect brightened, and
in the distance we saw the white walls of Capt. Thompson’s
residence gleaming through the mass of evergreens which
surrounded it. This, however, soon disappeared, and for a
mile or more my eye met with nothing save white birches,
grey rocks, green ferns, and blackberry bushes, until suddenly
turning a corner, we came to a halt before one of those
slanting-roofed houses so common in New England. It was
the home of Mr. Randall, and it was there that I was to
board the first week. In the doorway, eating bread and
molasses, were his three children who, the moment they saw
us, set up a shout of “somebody’s come. I guess it’s the
schoolma’am!” and straightway they took to their heels as
if fleeing from the presence of a tigress.
After a moment, the largest of them ventured to return,
and his example was soon followed by the other two, the
younger of whom, after eyeing me askance, lisped out, “Don
Thompthon thays he ain’t afraid of you; he can lick you
like dunder!”
This was a pleasant commencement, but I smiled down
upon the little boy, patting his curly head, while father
inquired for Mrs. Randall, who, we learned, was sweeping
the schoolhouse. Leaving the hair trunk, which was used
by the children for a horse ere we left the yard, we again
63set forward, and soon reached our place of destination,
which, without shade-tree or ornament of any kind, stood
half-way up a long, sunny hill, commanding a view of
nothing save the weathercock of Captain Thompson’s barn,
which was visible across the orchard opposite. We found
Mrs. Randall enveloped in a cloud of dust, her sleeves rolled
up, and her head covered by a black silk handkerchief.
“The room wasn’t fit for the pigs,” she said, “and ought
to have been cleaned, but somehow nobody took any interest
in school this summer, and I’d have to make it answer.”
I didn’t care particularly for the room, which, in truth,
was dirty and disagreeable enough, but the words “nobody
took any interest this summer,” affected me unpleasantly,
for in them I saw a dim foreshadowing of all that
ensued. Father, who was in a hurry, soon left me, bidding
me “be a good girl, and not get to romping with the
scholars.” From the window I watched him until he disappeared
over the sandy hill, half wishing, though I would
not then confess it, that I and the little trunk were with
him. I was roused from my reverie by Mrs. Randall, who,
for some time, had been looking inquisitively at me, and
who now said, “Ain’t you but thirteen?”
“No, ma’am,” I answered.
“Wall,” she returned, “it beats all how much older you
look. I should s’pose you was full sixteen, if not more.
But it’s all in your favor, and I guess you’ll be more likely
to suit the deestrict, though they’re afraid you haven’t any
government, and they’re terrible hard to suit. So, if I’s
you,” she continued, “I’d hold a pretty tight rein at first.
I give you full liberty to whip my young ones if they don’t
behave. They know better than to complain at home.”
Involuntarily I glanced at the clump of alders which
grew near the house, and if they were somewhat diminished
64ere my reign was o’er, the “Deestrict” owed it to Mrs.
Randall’s suggestion. After sitting awhile, she arose to go,
telling me “she should expect me at night,” and then I was
alone. I looked at my watch; it was half-past eight, and
not a scholar yet. This was widely different from Meadow
Brook, where, by seven, the house was generally filled with
children, hallooing, quarrelling over seats, and watching
eagerly for the first sight of “the new schoolma’am.” Here
the tables were turned, and “the schoolma’am” was watching
for her scholars!
Suddenly a large bumble-bee came buzzing in, and alighted
on a window opposite. Like Sir Thomas the Good, in
the Ingoldsby Legends, I have a passion for capturing
insects, especially whitefaced bumble-bees, and now I felt
strongly inclined to mount the desks in pursuit of the
intruder, but the thought “What if the scholars should
detect me?” prevented, and, to this day, I have never
known whether that bumble-bee had a white face, or belonged
to the class of colored brethren! Ten minutes of
nine, and I began to grow fidgety. I should have been
more so, had I known how much is sometimes said about
teachers not keeping their hours. Five minutes of nine,
and round the corner at the foot of the hill appeared a
group of children, while from another direction came others,
shouting for those in advance to “wait,” which they did,
and the whole entered the house together. A few of the
girls made a slight obeisance, while the boys laughed, and
throwing down their books in a very consequential manner,
looked distrustfully at me. My age had preceded me, and
in many of these childish hearts there was already a spirit
of rebellion.
Here I would speak against the impropriety of discussing
a teacher’s faults in the presence of pupils, who will
65discover them soon enough. Many a teacher starts disadvantageously
because of some idle tale, which may or may
not be true, but which, borne on the wings of gossip,
reaches its place of destination, and is there thoughtlessly
canvassed in the hearing of children, who thus become
prejudiced against a person they have never seen, and whom
they otherwise might have liked. In my case, the fault was
my age, which had evidently been discussed in the neighborhood;
for, on opening my desk, I found inscribed upon
the lid, in a bold schoolboy style, “Rosa Lee, aged 13,”
to which was appended, in a more delicate hand, “Ancient—very!”
Taking my India-rubber, I erased it while my scholars
were settling the matter of seats, which, strange to say
they did without disputing. Then there ensued a perfect
silence, and the eyes of all present turned inquiringly upon
me, while, with sundry flourishes with my silver pencil, I
proceeded to take down upon a big sheet of foolscap the
names, ages, and “what studies do you intend to pursue?”
of my pupils. After much talking and arranging, the
school was organized; but the first morning dragged heavily,
and when 12 o’clock came, and I drew from my sachel the
nice ginger snaps which mother had made, the sight of
them, or the taste, or something else, choked me so much
that I was obliged to wink hard, and count the rows of
trees in the orchard opposite twice, ere I could answer the
question addressed to me by one of the little girls.
In the rear of the house was a long strip of dense woods,
and wishing to be alone and out of sight of the sports in
which I felt I must not join, I took my bonnet and wandered
thither. Seating myself upon a mossy log, I tried to fancy
that I was at home beneath the dear old grape-vine, the
faintest rustle of whose broad green leaves would, at that
66moment, have been to me like the sweetest music. But it
could not be. I was a schoolmistress—Miss Lee, they
called me, and on my brow the shadows of life were thus
early making their impress. Slowly to me dragged the
hour which always before had been so short, and when at
last I took my way back to school, it seemed that in that
short space I had lived an age. Often since, when I have
looked upon young teachers hastening to their task, I’ve
pitied them, for I knew full well how long and wearisome
would be their first day’s labor.
As I approached the schoolhouse I saw that something
was the matter, for the scholars were greatly excited, and
with voices raised to the highest pitch, were discussing
something of importance. Thinking that my presence
would perhaps restrain them from such noisy demonstration$,
I hastened forward, but the babel rather increased
than diminished, and it was with difficulty that I could
learn the cause of the commotion. George Randall was
crying, while a little apart from him stood two boys, one of
them apparently fourteen and the other twelve. They were
strangers to me and instinctively I felt that they were in
some way connected with the disturbance; and that the
larger and more important looking was John Thompson, a
surmise which proved to be correct.
It seemed that Isaac Ross, one of the new comers, had
some weeks before selected for himself a corner seat, which,
as he was not present in the morning, had been taken by
George Randall, who knew nothing of Isaac’s intentions,
and who now refused to give it up. A fight was the result,
the most of the scholars taking sides with George, while
Isaac was urged on and encouraged by John Thompson,
who, though not a pupil, had come up “to see how he liked
the schoolma’am.” As a matter of course an appeal was
67made to me, to know “if George hadn’t the best right to
the seat,”
Perhaps I was wrong, but I decided that he had, at the
same time asking Isaac “if he were coming to school.”
“I ain’t goin’ to do anything else,” said he, glancing
towards John, who, with a wicked leer at me, knocked off
one of the little boys’ hats and then threw it up in the
air.
What would have ensued next I do not know, for at that
moment Captain Thompson rode round the corner and
called to his son, who, with mock deference, bowed politely
to me and walked away. Disagreeable as Isaac Ross
appeared in the presence of John Thompson, I found that
when left to himself he was quite a different boy, and
though he at first manifested some reluctance to taking
another seat, he at last yielded the point, and for the
remainder of the day conducted himself with perfect propriety.
On the whole, the afternoon passed away rather pleasantly,
and at night, when school was out, I started for my
boarding-place quite contented with teachers generally, and
myself in particular. In passing the different houses which
stood upon the road-side, I demeaned myself with the
utmost dignity, swinging my short dress from side to side in
imitation of a Boston lady who had once taught in our district,
and whose manner of walking I greatly admired!
From the window of Captain Thompson’s dwelling I caught
a glimpse of two faces, which were hastily withdrawn, but
I felt sure that from behind the curtains they were
scanning my appearance, and I remember lowering my
parasol a little, just to tantalize them! But when at last I
was over the hill and out of sight, oh, how glad I was to
be “Rosa Lee” again, free to pluck the sweet, wild flowers,
68to watch the little fishes in the running brook, or even to
chase a whitefaced bumble-bee if I liked.
About fifty rods from Mr. Randall’s stands one of those
old-fashioned, gable-roofed houses, so common in some parts
of New England, and here, at the time of which I am
speaking, lived Mrs. Ross, the mother of Isaac, or Ike, as he
was familiarly called. I had never met the lady, but as I
approached the house and saw a tall, square-shouldered
woman leaning on the gate, I naturally thought that it
might be she; and on this point I was not long left in
doubt, for the moment I came within speaking distance, she
called out, “How dy’ do, Miss Lee—I s’pose ’tis? You
pretty well? I’m Miss Ross, Isick’s mother. He telled me
that he had some fuss about a seat that he picked out
more’n a month ago, and thinks he orto have. I don’t
never calkerlate to take sides with my children, ’cause I’ve
kept school myself, and I know how bad ’tis, but I do
hate to have Isick git a miff again the schoolma’am on
the first start, and if I’s you I’d let him have the seat
instead of George Randall, for mebby folks’ll say you’re partial
to George, bein’ that his father’s committee-man, and
I’ve kept school enough to know that partiality won’t do.”
As well as I could, I explained the matter to her, telling
her I wished to do right, and meant to as far as I knew
how.
“I presume you do,” said she, “or I shouldn’t a’ taken
the liberty to speak to you. I knew you’s young, and I felt
afeard you didn’t know what an undertakin’ it was to teach
the young idee how to shute. The schoolma’ams have
always thought a sight of me, and generally tell me all their
troubles, so I know jest how to take their part when the
rest of the folks are again ’em. Was Susan Brown to
school? But she wasn’t though, I know she wasn’t.”
69I replied that there was a little girl present of that name,
and my companion continued: “Now I’ll give up, if Miss
Brown has come round enough to send, when she was so
dreadfully opposed to your teaching you’ve heerd about it,
I s’pose?”
I answered that “I didn’t know that any one had opposed
me except Mrs. Thompson.”
“Oh, yes,” said she, assuming an injured look and tone.
“Everybody knows about that, and there’s some sense in
their bein’ mad, for ’twas plaguy mortifyin’ to Dell to offer
to teach and be rejected by Mr. Randall, a man that none
of the Thompsons would wipe their old shoes on, and then,
’tisn’t every big bug that will stoop to teach, for you know
’tain’t considered fust cut.”
“No, I didn’t know it,” and so I said, but she assured me
of the fact, quoting as authority, both Mrs. Thompson and
Dell, who, I found, were her oracles in everything. After a
time I brought her back to Mrs. Brown, whose husband, she
said, was gone to sea, and who had herself applied for the
school.
“But between you and me,” she added, speaking in a
whisper, “it’s a mighty good thing that she didn’t get it,
for she ain’t the likeliest person that ever was, and nobody
under the sun would have sent to her. Isick shouldn’t a’
gone a single day, for her morals is very bad. She used to
belong to the Orthodox Church, but they turned her out for
dancin’ at a party, and when she lived in Wooster she
jined the ‘Piscopals, who, you know, let their members cut
up all sorts—but, land sakes! how I’m talkin’! You must
not breathe a word I say, for I make it a pint not to slander
my neighbors, and if everybody minded their own
business as well as I do, there wouldn’t be so much backbitin’
as there is. And that makes me think I’ve half
70a mind to caution you—but no, I guess I won’t—mebby
you’ll tell on’t.”
Of course my curiosity was roused, and of course I said
I wouldn’t tell; whereupon she proceeded to inform me that
Mrs. Randall was a very talkin’ woman, and I must be
pretty careful in her presence. “You can tell me anything
you wish to,” said she, “for I’m a master hand to keep a
secret; but Miss Randall is forever in hot water. She and
Miss Brown are hand in glove, and both on ’em turn up
their noses at Miss Thompson and Dell, who never pretend
to make anything of ’em. I’m considerable intimate, at the
Captain’s, and I know all about it. Dell is smart as a steel
trap, and it’s a pity she’s took such a dislike to you.”
“I don’t think she ought to blame me,” said I, “for I
didn’t know as she wanted the school”——
“’Tain’t that altogether,” resumed Mrs. Ross, again speaking
in a whisper. “’Tain’t that altogether, and if you’ll
never lisp a word on’t I’ll tell you the hull story.”
I gave the required promise, and then Mrs. Ross proceeded
to inform me that Dell was jealous of me.
“Jealous!” I exclaimed. “How can that be?”
“You remember Dr. Clayton, don’t you?” said she.
“Yes, I remember him, but what has he to do with Miss
Thompson’s being jealous of me!”
“Why,” returned Mrs. Ross, “Dell’s kinder settin’ her
cap for him, and I guess he’s a snickerin’ notion after her.
Any way he comes there pretty often. Well, he was there
the week after the examination, and told ’em about you.
He said you was bright as a new guinea, and had better
larnin’ than half the teachers, and then you had such a
sweet name—Rose—he liked it. You orto have seen how
mad Dell was at you after he was gone. I don’t b’lieve
she’ll ever git over it.”
71Here Ike called out that “the Johnny-cake was burnt
blacker than his hat,” and forthwith Mrs. Ross started for
the house, first bidding me “keep dark,” and telling me she
hoped “I wouldn’t be partial to Mr. Randall’s children, for
they needed lickin’ if ever young ones did—they warn’t
brought up like Isick, who was governed so well at home
that he didn’t need it at school.”
I was learning to read the world’s great book fast—very
fast—and with a slightly heavy heart I turned away, pausing
once while Mrs. Ross, from the doorstep, called to me,
saying, that “she guessed I’d better give Isick the seat to-morrow,
seem’ his heart was set on’t.”
I found Mrs. Randall waiting to receive me in a clean
gingham dress and apron, with her round, good-humored face
shining as if it had been through the same process with the
long line of snow-white linen, which was swinging in the
clothes-yard. The little hair trunk had been removed to the
“best room,” which was to be mine. The big rocking-chair
was brought out for me, the round tea table, nicely spread,
stood in the centre of the floor, and Mrs. Randall hoped I
would make myself at home, and put up with her own rough
ways if I could. To be sure, she didn’t have things quite as
nice as Mrs. Captain Thompson, but she did as well as she
knew how. Dear Mrs. Randall! how my heart warmed towards
her; and as I took my seat at the table, and she
helped me to a larger slice of pure white honeycomb than I
had ever before been allowed to eat at one time, I felt that I
would not exchange her house for a home at Capt. Thompson’s.
Without any intention of revealing what Mrs. Ross had
imparted to me, I still felt a great curiosity to know Mrs.
Randall’s opinion of her; so, after a time, I ventured to
speak of my having seen her, and to ask when and where she
taught school. With a merry laugh, Mrs. Randall replied,
72“I wonder, now, if she’s made your acquaintance so soon!
She told you, I suppose, to come to her with all your troubles,
for she knew just how to pity you, as she’d been a
schoolma’am herself.”
My flushed cheeks betrayed the fact that Mrs. Randall
had guessed rightly, and after a moment she continued:
“Her keeping school amounts to this. When she was a girl,
a friend of hers who was teaching wanted to go away for
two days, and got Miss Ross, then Nancy Smedly, to take her
place, and that’s the long and short of her experience. She’s
a meddlesome woman, and makes more trouble in the District
than anybody else. She tried to make Miss Brown
think she was misused, because we wouldn’t hire her instead
of you, who applied first, and for a spell, I guess Miss Brown
was a little sideways, but she’s a sensible woman and has got
all over it.”
I was about to tell her of the trouble between George and
Ike, when she anticipated me by saying, “George says he
and Ike Ross fit about a seat, and I’ve hired him to give it
up peaceably, for if Miss Ross gets miffed in the beginning,
there’s no knowing what kind of a row she’ll raise, and you
are so young I feel kinder tender of you.”
If there were tears in my eyes, they were not tears of
grief, and if I was pleased with Mrs. Randall before, I liked
her ten times better now, for I saw in her a genuine sincerity
which convinced me she was my friend indeed. To be
sure, she was rather rough and unrefined, but her heart was
right, and in her treatment of me, she was always kind and
considerate, making ample allowance for my errors and
warmly defending me when she thought I was misused. If
in every District there were more like Mrs. Randall, the
teacher’s lot would not be one half so hard to bear as oftentimes
it is.
73When I awoke next morning I heard the large raindrops
pattering against the window, and on pushing aside
the curtain, I saw that the dark heavy clouds betokened a
dull rainy day. Involuntarily, I thought of the old garret at
home, where on such occasions we always resorted, “raising
Cain generally,” as Sally said, and when, with umbrella, blanket-shawl,
and overshoes, I started for school, I looked and felt
forlorn indeed. Raining as it was, it did not prevent Mrs.
Ross from coming out with the table-spread over her head,
to tell me that “though she never warn’t an atom particular,
and never meant to interfere with teachers, as she knew
just what it was, she did hope I’d give Isick the seat, and
not be partial to George Randall.”
I replied that “I’d see to it,” and was hurrying along,
when she again stopped me to know “what I’d got in my
dinner basket that was good.”
Afterwards I found it to be one of her greatest peculiarities,
this desire to know what her neighbors had to eat, and
I seldom passed her door that she did not inquire of me concerning
the “kind of fare” I had at the different places
where I boarded. When I reached the schoolhouse, I
found George Randall transferring his books to another part
of the room, at the same time telling Isaac “he could have the
disputed seat if he wanted it.”
With the right kind of training and influence Isaac Ross
would have been a fine boy, for there were in his disposition
many noble traits of character, and when he saw how readily
George gave up the seat, he refused to take it, saying,
“he didn’t care a darn where he sat—one place was as good
as another.”
That day was long and dreary enough. Not more than
half the children were there, and I found it exceedingly tiresome
and monotonous, sitting in that hard, splint-bottomed
74chair, and telling Emma Fitch and Sophia Brown, for the
hundredth time, that the round letter was “O” and the crooked
one “S.” The scholars, too, began to grow noisy, and to ask
me scores of useless questions. Their lessons were half
learned, and if I made a suggestion, I was quickly informed
that their former teacher, Sally Damm, didn’t do so. Even
little Emma Fitch, when I bade her keep her eyes on the
book instead of letting them wander about the room, lisped
out that “Thally Damm let her look off;” a fact I did not
dispute when I found that she had been to school all winter
without learning a single letter by sight, though she could
repeat the entire alphabet forward and back and be all the
while watching a squirrel on the branches of the tree which
grew near the window.
Before night a peculiar kind of sickness, never dangerous,
but decidedly disagreeable, began to creep over me, and
had it not been for the mud, I should probably have footed
it to Meadow Brook, where alone could be found the cure
for my disease. Just before school was out a little boy
cried to go home, and this was the one straw too many.
Hastily dismissing the scholars, I turned towards the window
and my tears fell as fast as did the rain in the early
morning.
“The schoolma’am’s cryin,’—she is. I saw her,” circulated
rapidly among the children, who all rushed back to
ascertain the truth for themselves.
“I should think she would cry,” said one of the girls to
her brother. “You’ve acted ugly enough to make anybody
cry, and if you don’t behave better to-morrow, Jim
Maxwell, I’ll tell mother!”
After the delivery of this speech, the entire group moved
away, leaving me alone; and sure am I there was never
a more homesick child than was the one, who, with her
75head lying upon the desk, sat there weeping in that low,
dirty schoolroom, on that dark, rainy afternoon. Where
now was all the happiness I had promised myself in teaching?
Alas! it was rapidly disappearing, and I was just
making up my mind to brave the ridicule of Meadow
Brook, and give up my school at once, when a hand was
laid very gently on my shoulder, and a voice partially
familiar said, “What’s the matter, Rose?”
So absorbed was I in my grief, that I had not heard the
sound of footsteps, and with a start of surprise I looked up
and met the serene, handsome eyes of Dr. Clayton, who
stood at my side! He had been to visit a patient, he said,
and was on his way home, when, seeing the door ajar, he
had come in, hoping to find me there, “but I did not expect
this,” he continued, pointing to the tears on my cheek.
“What is the matter? Don’t the scholars behave well,
or are you homesick?”
At this question I began to cry so violently, that the
doctor, after exhausting all his powers of persuasion, finally
laid his hand soothingly on my rough, tangled curls, ere I
could be induced to stop. Then, when I told him how disappointed
I was, how I wished I had never tried to teach,
and how I meant to give it up, he talked to me so kindly,
so brotherlike, still keeping his hand on my shoulder, where
it had fallen when I lifted up my head, that I grew very
calm, thinking I could stay in that gloomy room forever,
if he were only there! He was, as I have said before, very
handsome, and his manner was so very fascinating, and his
treatment of me so much like what I fancied Charlie’s would
be, were he a grown up man and I a little girl, that I
began to like him very, very much, thinking then that my
feeling for him was such as a child would entertain for a
father, for I had heard that he was twenty-seven, and between
76that and thirteen there was, in my estimation, an
impassable gulf.
“I wish I had my buggy here,” he said at last, after
consulting his watch, which pointed to half-past five, “I
wish I had my buggy here, for then I could carry you home.
You’ll wet your feet, and you ought not to walk. Suppose
you ride in my lap; but no,” he added, quickly, “you’d
better not, for Mrs. Thompson and Mother Ross would
make it a neighborhood talk.”
There was a wicked look in his eye as he said this, and
I secretly wondered if he entertained the same opinion of
Dell, that he evidently did of her sister. At length, shaking
my hand, he bade me good-bye, telling me that the
Examining Committee had placed me and my school in his
charge, and that he should probably visit me officially on
Thursday of the following week. Like a very foolish child,
I watched him until a turn in the road hid him from view,
and then, with a feeling I could not analyze, I started for
my boarding-place, thinking that if I gave up my school I
should wait until after Thursday.
In the doorway, with her sleeves rolled up above her
elbows, and her hair, as she herself said, “at sixes and
sevens,” was Mrs. Ross, who, after informing me that “it
had been a desput rainy day,” asked, “if I knew whether
Dr. Clayton had been to Captain Thompson’s?”
There was no reason why I should blush at this question,
but I did, though my sun-bonnet fortunately concealed the
fact from my interrogator, who, without waiting for an
answer, continued, “He drove past here about fifteen minutes
ago, and I guess he’s been sparkin’ Dell.”
It must have been an evil spirit surely which prompted my
reply that “he had been at the schoolhouse with me.”
“How you talk! Isick never said a word about it!”
77was Mrs. Ross’s exclamation, the blank expression of her
face growing still more blank when I told her that he did
not come until the scholars were gone.
“You two been there all sole alone since four o’clock!
I’ll give up now! I hope Dell Thompson won’t find it out,
for she’s awful slandersome; but,” she added, coming to the
gate, and speaking in a whisper, “I’m glad on’t, and mebby
she’ll draw in her horns, if she finds that some of the under
crust, as she calls ’em, can be noticed by Dr. Clayton as
well as herself.”
Equivocal as this compliment was, it gratified me, and
from that moment I felt a spirit of rivalry towards Dell
Thompson. Still, I did not wish her to know of Dr. Clayton’s
call, and so I said to Mrs. Ross, who replied, “You
needn’t be an atom afeard of my tattlin’. I know too well
what ’tis to be a schoolmarm, and have the hull Deestrict
peekin’ at you. So if you’ve anything you want kept, I’m
the one; for I can be still as the grave. Did the doctor
say anything about Dell, but he didn’t, I know, and ’taint
likely he said anything about anybody.”
I replied, that he talked with me about my school, and
then as I heard the clock strike six I walked along. Looking
back, as I entered Mr. Randall’s gate, I saw Mrs. Ross’s
old plaid shawl and brown bonnet disappearing over the
hill as fast as her feet could take them, but I had no
suspicion that her destination was Captain Thompson’s!
I did not know the world then as well as I do now, and
when the next morning I met Dell Thompson, who stared
at me insolently, while a haughty sneer curled her lip,
I had no idea that she was jealous of me, little Rosa
Lee, whose heart was lighter, and whose task seemed far
easier on account of Dr. Clayton’s past and promised
visit.
78Saturday night came at last, and very joyfully I started
home on foot, feeling not at all burdened with the compliments
of my patrons or the esteem of my pupils. Oh, what
a shout was raised at the shortness of my three weeks, as
I entered our sitting-room! All laughed at me, except my
mother. She was not disappointed, and when I drew Carrie’s
little rocking-chair to her side, and told her how hard
my head was aching, she laid her soft hand caressingly upon
my brow, and gently smoothing my short curls, bathed my
forehead in camphor until the pain was gone. Had there
been no one present but our own family, I should probably
have cried; but owing to some untoward circumstance, Aunt
Sally Wright was there visiting that afternoon, and as a
teacher I felt obliged to maintain my dignity before her
prying eyes. Almost her first salutation to me was, “Wall,
Rosa, so you’ve grown old since you left home?”
“I do not understand what you mean,” I answered.
“Why, I mean,” said she, “that somebody told me that
Mrs. Green told them, that Major Pond’s wife told her, that
Mary Downes said, that Nancy Rice heard Miss Cap’n
Thompson say that you told Dr. Clayton you was sixteen!”
I knew that the subject of my age had not come up
between me and the doctor, but it was useless to deny a
story so well authenticated, so I said nothing, and Aunt
Sally continued; “They do say you thrash ’em round about
right,” while mother asked “who Dr. Clayton was?”
“Why, he’s a young pill-peddler, who’s taken a shine to
Rosa, and staid with her alone in the schoolhouse until pitch
dark,” said Aunt Sally, her little green eyes twinkling with
the immense satisfaction she felt.
Greatly I marvelled as to the source whence she obtained
the information, which so greatly exceeded the truth; and
considering that no one knew of the doctor’s call but Mrs.
79Ross, it really was a wonder! She was proceeding with
her remarks, when we were summoned to the supper table,
where green tea had so good an effect upon her, that by the
time she was blowing her third cup, she began to unbend,
repeating to me several complimentary remarks which she
said came from Mrs. Ross. By this I knew that she had
Pine Hill as well as Meadow Brook upon her hands, and, indeed,
’twas strange how much Aunt Sally did manage to
attend to at once; for, besides keeping her son’s wife continually
fretted, and her daughter constantly quarrelling
with her husband, by her foolish interference; there was
scarcely a thing transpired in the neighborhood in which she
did not have a part. Not a marriage was in prospect, but
she knew something bad of both parties; not a family jar
occurred in which she did not have a finger. Not a man
owed more than he was worth, but she had foreseen it from
the first in the extravagance of his wife. But everybody in
Meadow Brook knew Aunt Sally, and it was a common saying,
that “her tongue was no slander;” so I did not feel as
much annoyed as I otherwise should at her spiteful remarks,
which continued with little intermission until dark, when,
gathering up her snuff-box, knitting, and work-bag, she
started for home.
The next day was the Sabbath, and if at church, I did
now and then cast a furtive glance at the congregation, to
see if they were looking at me because I was a “schoolma’am,”
it was a childish vanity, which I have long since
forgiven, as I trust my reader will do. Among the audience
was our minister’s young bride, and when, after church,
he introduced her to me, saying to her, “This is Rose, who,
I told you, was only thirteen and teaching school,” I felt
quite reconciled to my lot, and thought that after all, it
was an honor to be a teacher.
CHAPTER VI. DR. CLAYTON’S VISIT.
80
Very slowly passed the days of my second week, for my
mind was constantly dwelling upon the important Thursday,
which came at last, and, with more than usual care, I
dressed myself for school, sporting a pale blue and white
muslin, which mother said I must wear only on great occasions.
And this, to me, was a great occasion; and if, for
want of a better mirror, I at noon went down to a clear
spring in the woods, and there gave a few smoothing touches
to my toilet, it was a weakness of which, in a similar way,
many an older female has been guilty. On my return to the
schoolhouse, I requested one of the larger girls to sweep the
floor as clean as she possibly could, while two or three of
the boys were sent after some green boughs to hang over
the windows.
“I’ll bet we are going to have company; I thought so
this morning when I see the schoolma’am all dressed up,”
whispered one to another—and after a time, Jim Maxwell’s
sister ventured to ask me, not who was coming, but “how
many.”
With a blush, I replied, “Nobody but Dr. Clayton,” wondering
why his name should cleave so to the roof of my
mouth! In a few minutes, the fact that Dr. Clayton was
coming was known both indoors and out, and when I saw
81how fast John Thompson took himself home, after learning
the news, I involuntarily felt as if some evil were impending—a
presentiment which proved correct, for not long after
school commenced, there came a gentle rap at the outer
door, which caused a great straightening up among the
scholars, and brought me instantly to my feet, for I supposed,
of course, he had come. What, then, was my surprise
when, instead of him, I met a haughty-looking young
lady, who, frowning majestically upon me, introduced herself
as “Miss Thompson,” saying she had come to visit the
school.
I had never before had so good a view of her, and now,
when I saw how dignified she appeared, and that there
really was in her manner something elegant and refined, I
not only felt myself greatly her inferior, but I fancied that
Dr. Clayton would also observe the difference between us
when he saw us together. After offering her the seat of
honor—my splint-bottomed chair—I proceeded with my
duties as composedly as possible, mentally hoping that the
doctor would come soon. She probably divined my
thoughts, for once, when I cast a wistful glance over the
long hill, she said, “You seem to be constantly on the lookout.
Are you expecting any one?”
Involuntarily my eyes sought hers, but I quailed beneath
their quizzical expression, and scarcely knowing what I said,
replied, “No, ma’am,” repenting the falsehood the moment
it was uttered, and half-resolving to confess the truth, when
she rejoined, “Oh, I thought you were,” while at the same
moment a little girl, who had been asleep, rolled from her
seat, bumping her head, and raising such an outcry that, for
a time, I forgot what I had said, and when it again recurred
to me I thought it was too late to rectify it. It was the
second falsehood I remembered telling, and it troubled me
82greatly. Turn it which way I would it was a lie still, and
it smote heavily upon my conscience. Slowly the afternoon
dragged on, but it brought no Dr. Clayton; and when, at a
quarter of four, I called up my class of Abecedarians to read,
what with the lie and the disappointment, my heart was so
full that I could not force back all the tears which struggled
so fiercely for egress; and when it came Willie Randall’s
turn to read, two or three large drops fell upon his chubby
hand, and, looking in my face, he called out in a loud, distinct
voice—“You’re cryin’, you be!”
This, of course, brought a laugh from all the scholars, in
which I was fain to join, although I felt greatly chagrined
that I should have betrayed so much weakness before
Dell Thompson, who, in referring to it when school was out,
said, “she supposed I wanted to see my mother, or somebody!”
The sarcastic smile which dimpled the corners of her
mouth angered me, and when, at last, I was alone, my long
pent-up tears fell in copious showers. It is my misfortune
never to be able to cry without disfiguring my face, so that
it is sometimes almost hideous to look upon; and now, as I
slowly walked home, I carefully kept my parasol lowered, so
that no one should see me. But I could not elude the vigilance
of Mrs. Ross, who, as usual, was at her post in the
doorway. Although I knew she was a dangerous woman, I
rather liked her, for there was, to me, something winning in
her apparent friendliness, and we had come to be quite intimate,
so much so that I usually called there on my way to
or from school; but now, when she bade me come in, I declined,
which act brought her at once to the gate, where she
obtained a full view of my swollen features.
“Laws a mercy!” she exclaimed, “what’s up now?
Why, you look like a toad. What’s the matter?”
83“Nothing much,” I said, and this was all she could solicit
from me.
That night she called at Mr. Randall’s, and after sitting
awhile, asked me “to walk a little piece with her.” I saw
there was something on her mind, and conjecturing that it
might have some connection with me, I obeyed willingly,
notwithstanding Mrs. Randall’s silent attempts to keep me
back. Twitching my sleeve when we were outside the gate,
Mrs. Ross asked if “it were true that I cried because Dr.
Clayton didn’t come as he promised?”
“Why, what do you mean?” I said. To which she replied,
by telling me that after I left her, she just ran in to Cap’n
Thompson’s a minute or two, when, who should she find
there but Dr. Clayton, and when Dell told him she’d been to
visit the school, he said, “Ah, indeed, I was intending to do
so myself this afternoon, but I was necessarily detained by a
very sick patient.”
“‘That explains why she cried so,’ said Dell, and then,”
continued Mrs. Ross, “she went on to tell him how you
looked out of the winder, and when she asked you if you expected
anybody, you said ‘No,’ and then at last you cried
right out in the school.”
“The mean thing!” I exclaimed. “Did she tell Dr.
Clayton all that?”
“Yes, she did,” answered Mrs. Ross; “and it made my
blood bile to hear her go on makin’ fun of you, that is, kinder
makin’ fun.”
“And the doctor, what did he say?” I asked. To which she
replied, “Oh, he laughed, and said it was too bad to disappoint
you, if it affected you like that, but he couldn’t help
it.”
I hardly knew at which I was most indignant, Dr. Clayton
or Dell, and when I laid my aching head on my pillow, my
84last thoughts were, that “if Dr. Clayton ever did come to
school I’d let him know I didn’t care for him—he might have
Dell Thompson and welcome!”
I changed my mind, however, when early the next afternoon,
the gentleman himself appeared to vindicate his cause,
saying he was sorry that he could not have kept his appointment,
adding, as he finally relinquished my hand, “You had
company, though, I believe, and so, on the whole, I am glad
I was detained, for I had rather visit you alone.”
Much as I now esteem Dr. Clayton, I do not hesitate to
say that he was then a male flirt, a species of mankind which
I detest. He was the handsomest, most agreeable man I
had ever seen, and by some strange fascination, he possessed
the power of swaying me at his will. This he well knew,
and hence the wrong he committed by working upon my
feelings. Never passed hours more agreeably to me than
did those of that afternoon. And I even forgot that I was
to go home that night, and that in all probability father
would come for me as soon as school was out, thus preventing
the quiet talk alone with Dr. Clayton, which I so much
desired: so when, about four o’clock, I saw the head of old
Sorrel appearing over the hill, my emotions were not particularly
pleasant, and I wished I had not been so foolish as to
insist upon going home every week. The driver, however,
proved to be Charlie, and this in a measure consoled me, for
he, I knew, was good at taking hints, and would wait for me
as long as I desired; so I welcomed him with a tolerably
good grace, introducing him to Dr. Clayton, who addressed
him as Mr. Lee, thereby winning his friendship at once and
forever!
When school was out and the scholars gone, I commenced
making preparations for my departure, shutting down the
windows and piling away books, slowly and deliberately,
85while Charlie, who seemed in no hurry, amused himself by
whipping at the thistle-tops which grew near the door. At
last Dr. Clayton, turning to him, said, “And so you have
come to carry your sister home, when I was promising myself
that pleasure?”
Charlie glanced at my face, and its expression, doubtless,
prompted his answer, “You can do so now, if you choose,
for I like to ride alone.”
Of course I disclaimed against such an arrangement, but
my objections were overruled, and almost before I knew what
I was doing, I found myself seated in Dr. Clayton’s covered
buggy, with him at my side. Telling Charlie “not to be
surprised if he did not see us until sunset,” he drove off in a
different direction from Meadow Brook, remarking to me that
“it was a fine afternoon for riding and he meant to enjoy it.”
I hardly know whether he had any object in passing Capt.
Thompson’s, but he certainly did so, bowing graciously and
showing his white teeth to Dell, who, from a chamber window,
looked haughtily down upon me, and as I afterwards
learned, made fun of my pink sun-bonnet and little yellow
dotted shawl. The sight of her naturally led him to speak
of her, and much to my surprise, he asked me how I liked
her! I could not answer truthfully and say “very well;” so
I replied that “I hardly knew her. She was very fine looking,
and I presumed she was very intelligent and accomplished.”
“You are a good-hearted little girl, Rose,” said he, “to
speak thus of her. Do you suppose she would do the same
by you if asked a similar question?”
“Oh, no,” I answered, eagerly, “she couldn’t say I was
fine looking. Nobody ever said that.”
“If I should tell you that I think you better looking than
Dell Thompson, what would you say?” he asked, looking
86under my bonnet, while, with glowing cheeks, I turned my
head away, and replied, “I am sure you would not mean it.
I know I am ugly, but I do not care so much about it now
as I used to.”
There was a silence for some minutes, and when he spoke
again, it was of faces, which, without regularity of features
or brilliancy of complexion, still had an expression exceedingly
pleasing and attractive. “I do not say yours is such
a face,” said he, “for I never flatter; but I do say, and I
mean it, too, that I like your looks far better than I do Miss
Thompson’s.
If I had cried then, as I wished to, I should have done a
most foolish thing; but by a strong effort of the will, I
forced down my tears, and changing the conversation, commenced
talking on subjects quite foreign to Dell Thompson,
or good looks. I found Dr. Clayton a most agreeable companion,
and ere the close of that ride, he was “all the
world” to me. In short, I suppose I was as much in love as
a child of thirteen can well be, and when we at last reached
home and I introduced him to my mother and sisters, I
blushed like a guilty thing, stealing out of the room as soon
as possible, and staying out for a long time, although I wanted
so much to be back there with him.
“Catched a beau, hain’t you? and a handsome one, too!”
said Sally, applying her eye to the key-hole and thus obtaining
a view of his face.
Tommy Trimmer, a little boy, five years of age, who lived
near by, and who chanced to be there, overheard her, and
when Dr. Clayton, who was very fond of children, coaxed
him into his lap, he asked, pointing to me, “Be you Rosa’s
beau? Sally said you was!”
The doctor laughed aloud, referring Tommy to me for an
answer, and telling him “it was just as I said.”
87“Rose is altogether too young to be riding round with
beaux. It will give her a bad name,” said grandma, when
at last the doctor was gone.
No one made any answer until Lizzie, who was more of
my way of thinking, said, “You must have had beaux early,
grandma, for you wasn’t quite fifteen when you were married;
I saw it so in the Bible!”
Of course, grandma had nothing to offer in her own
defence, save the very correct remark, that “girls now-adays
were not what they were when she was young;”—and
here the conversation ceased.
CHAPTER VII. DELL THOMPSON’S PARTY.
88
One day, about three weeks after the commencement of
my school, I was surprised by a call from Dell Thompson,
who, after conversing awhile, very familiarly, astonished
me with an invitation to visit her the next afternoon. “She
was going to have a few of her friends from the village,” she
said, “Dr. Clayton with the rest.”
Here she looked at me and I looked out of the window,
while she continued, “You’ll come, I suppose.”
I replied that I would, after which she departed, leaving
me in a perfect state of bewilderment. I invited to Captain
Thompson’s, with Dell’s fashionable friends! What could
it mean, and what should I wear? This last was by far
the more important question; for I knew that the people
of the village were noted for their fine dress, and I, of
course, could not compete with them in point of elegance.
Dr. Clayton too, I had heard, was rather fastidious in
his ideas of a lady’s dress, and my heart sank within me as
I mentally enumerated the articles of my scanty wardrobe,
finding therein nothing which I deemed fit for the occasion,
save a white dotted muslin, which was now lying soiled and
wrinkled at the bottom of my trunk. It is true, I had a
blue and white lawn, neatly made and quite becoming, but
my heart was set upon the muslin, and so when Mrs. Ross,
89with whom I was that week boarding, offered to wash and
iron it, I accepted the proffered kindness.
The next morning, when I passed Captain Thompson’s, I
observed a great commotion in and around the house. The
blinds were thrown back, and through the parlor windows
I caught sight of brooms and dusters, while at intervals
during the day, the scholars brought me tidings of cake,
jellies, and ice-cream, said to be in progress. At precisely
four o’clock I dismissed school, and taking a short cut
across the fields, soon reached my boarding-place, where I
found Mrs. Ross bending over the ironing-table with a face
flushed, and indicative of some anxiety.
“I never see nothin’ beat it,” she began, holding down
her hot iron and thereby making a slightly yellow spot on
the dress. “I never see nothin’ beat it, how this gown pesters
me. It must be poor stuff, or somethin’,—but mebby
it’ll look better on you,” she continued, as she gave it a
finishing touch, and then held it up to view.
And, indeed, it was sorry looking enough; some places
being wholly destitute of starch, while others were rough
and stiff as a piece of buckram. Common sense told me
to wear the blue, but I had heard Dr. Clayton say that
nothing became a young girl so well as white, and so I
determined to wear it. It would look better on me, I
thought, and with all the eagerness of a child I commenced
my toilet, discovering to my great dismay that I had neither
shoes nor stockings fit to wear with a muslin dress. The
week previous I had taken my best ones home, where I had
purposely left them, not thinking it possible for me to need
them. Here then was a dilemma, out of which Mrs. Ross
at last helped me, by offering to lend the articles which I
lacked; an offer which I gladly accepted. Her stockings
were rather coarse, having been knit by herself, but they
90possessed the virtue of being white, and clean, and would
have answered my purpose very well, had it not been for
the slippers, which were far too long for me, and showed
almost the whole of my foot. Besides that, I found it rather
difficult keeping them on, until Mrs. Ross suggested the propriety
of stuffing the toes with cotton! This done, I donned
the muslin dress, which seemed to me much shorter than
when I had last worn it, inasmuch as I had the painful consciousness
of being all feet, whenever I glanced in that
direction.
But Mrs. Ross said “I looked mighty crank,” at the
same time fastening on my low-necked waist her glass
breastpin, which she pronounced, “just the checker.”
“You orto have some gloves to wear when you get there,”
said she, as she saw me drawing on my brown ones, “and I
b’lieve I’ve got the very thing,” she continued, bringing
from the depths of the bureau-drawer a pair of white cotton
mitts, fancifully embroidered on the back with yellow and
blue. These she bade me “tuck in my bosom until I got
there, and on no account to lose ’em, as she had ’em before
she was married!”
Thus equipped, I started for Captain Thompson’s, reaching
there just as the clock was striking five, and finding, to
my surprise, that I was not only the first arrival, but
that neither Mrs. Thompson nor Dell had yet commenced
dressing! Fearing I had mistaken the day, I questioned
the servant girl who answered my ring, and who assured me
that I was right, while at the same time, she conducted me
to the chamber above, where, in the long mirror, I obtained
a full-length view of myself, feet and all! My first
impulse was to laugh, my second to cry, and to the latter I
finally yielded. No one came near me—I heard no one—saw
no one, until in light flowing muslin, white silk hose,
91and the tiniest of all tiny French slippers, Dell Thompson
sailed into the room, starting with well feigned surprise
when she saw me, asking how long I had been there, and
what was the matter.
Without considering what I was doing, I told her unreservedly
about the shoes and stockings, pointing to my peacock
feet as proof of what I said. With all her faults, there
was enough of the woman about Dell to inspire her with a
feeling of pity for me, and after forcing back the laugh she
could not well help, she said kindly, “Your shoes are rather
large, but I think, perhaps, I can remedy the difficulty.”
At the same time she started to leave the room. What
new impulse came over her, I never knew; but sure am I
that something changed her mind, for, when nearly at the
door, she suddenly paused, saying; “I know, though, you
can’t wear my slippers, so it’s of no use trying the experiment:”
adding, as she saw how my countenance fell, “I
wouldn’t mind it if I were you. Nobody’ll notice it, unless
it is Dr. Clayton, who, I believe, admires small ankles and
little feet; but you don’t care for him, he’s old enough to
be your father, and, besides that, he thinks you perfect, any
way.”
Her words and manner annoyed me, and for a moment I
debated in my own mind the propriety of leaving at once,
but I had not seen Dr. Clayton since he carried me home,
and so I finally concluded to remain, thinking that I would
keep my seat, and on no account stir when he was looking
at me. After coming to this conclusion, I ventured to ask
Dell where the rest of the company were, and was told that
they were not invited until evening.
“Until evening,” I repeated; “then I guess I’ll go before
they come, for I shall be afraid to walk home alone.”
“There’s a good moon,” said she; adding, “You must
92not leave, on any account, for that will spoil all the—pleasure”
she said—fun I now think she meant; but I could
not fathom her then, and I never dreamed that she had
invited me there merely to show me up before her fashionable
friends, and make light of me in the estimation of Dr.
Clayton.
“Come down to the parlor,” she said at last, after
arranging for the third time the heavy braids of her black,
beautiful hair; and following her, I soon stood in the presence
of Mrs. Thompson, a tall, dark, haughty looking
woman, who, half arising from the sofa, bowed stiffly, muttering
a few words of welcome as Dell introduced me.
Dropping into the first seat, a large willow chair near
the door, I tried to act natural, but I could not; for turn
which way I would, I felt that a pair of large black eyes
were upon me, scanning me from my head to my feet; and
when her linen cambric handkerchief went up to her mouth,
apparently to stifle a cough, I was certain that it also
smothered a laugh, which I suppose my rather singular
appearance called forth. Right glad was I when both the
ladies found an excuse for leaving the parlor, though I did
find it rather tiresome sitting there alone until the shades
of evening began to fall.
At last, when it was nearly dark, I ventured out upon
the long piazza, where I had not been long, when a gentleman
on horseback galloped into the yard, and in a moment
I recognized Dr. Clayton’s voice, as he gave his horse to the
keeping of Capt. Thompson’s hired man. Hastily retreating
to the parlor, I had just time to seat myself in a corner
where I thought I should attract the least attention, when
he entered the room with Dell, whose hand I am sure
he held until he saw me; then quickly dropping it, he
advanced to my side, greeting me kindly, and once, when
93Dell’s back was towards us, whispering softly; “I am so
glad to find you here. I was afraid the party would prove
a bore.”
Just then we heard the sound of fast coming wheels, and
in a moment there came round the corner a long open omnibus,
drawn by four horses, and densely crowded with young
people of both sexes, all seemingly shouting and laughing
with all their might. I was not much used to the ways of
the world then, and having been taught that it was not
lady-like to be either rude or boisterous, I wondered greatly
that well-bred people should conduct themselves so badly:
a species of wonder, by the way, in which I now occasionally
indulge. Bounding out, and adjusting their light, flowing
robes, the young ladies went tripping up the stairs, still
talking, laughing, and screaming so loudly, that once I
started up, exclaiming, “Why, what is the matter!”
With a peculiar smile, Dr. Clayton laid his hand on my
head in a very fatherly way, saying; “My little girl hasn’t
yet learned that in order to be refined, she must be rough
and boisterous, and I hope she never will, for it is refreshing
to find occasionally something feminine and natural.”
By this time the guests were assembled in the parlor, and
when I saw how tastefully they were dressed, and how much
at ease they appeared, I began to wish myself anywhere but
there. One by one they were presented to me, I at first
keeping my seat; but when Dr. Clayton whispered to me to
stand up, I did so, bending my knees a little, so as to make
my dress longer, and thus partially hide my feet! But this
could not be done, and like two backgammon boards they
set out at right angles, with the wads of cotton lying up,
round and hard. The young ladies had undoubtedly
received a description of me, for they inspected me closely,
glancing the while mischievously at Dell, who seemed to be
94in her element; asking me if I were not tired; telling me I
looked so, and adding, aside, but loud enough for Dr. Clayton
and myself to hear—“I should think she would be, for
she’s been here ever since five o’clock. I hadn’t even commenced
dressing!”
“Is it possible?” said one; while another exclaimed,
“How green! but I suppose it’s her first introduction into
society, and she knows no better.”
This conversation was probably not intended for me, but
I heard it all, and with much bitterness at my heart I turned
away to hide my tears, involuntarily drawing nearer to Dr.
Clayton, as if for protection. But, for some reason or other,
he did not appear now as he did when we were alone; then
he was all kindness and attention, while he now evidently
avoided me; seeming slightly annoyed when any of his
acquaintance teased him about me, as I more than once
heard them doing. In his nature, as in every other man’s,
there were both good and bad qualities, and they now
seemed warring with each other; the former chiding him for
deserting me when I stood so much in need of his attention,
and the latter shrinking from anything which would incur
the ridicule of his companions.
At last, as if his good genius had conquered, he suddenly
broke away from a group of girls, and crossing over to
where I was standing, offered me his arm, telling me “I must
stir round and be more sociable.”
I looked down at my feet, so did he, and for an instant
there was a flush on his face; but it passed off, and with a
word of encouragement, he led me towards the music-room,
where Dell Thompson was unmercifully pounding a five
hundred dollar piano, which groaned and shrieked under
the infliction, while the bystanders, who had insisted upon
her playing, were all talking together, seemingly intent upon
95seeing which could make the most noise, they or the instrument.
“Do you play, Miss Lee?” was asked me by half a dozen
or more.
I had taken lessons two quarters, and I could play a few
dancing tunes, marches, etc., and so I said, whereupon they
insisted upon my favoring them with Money Musk, as they
wanted to dance, and none of them could perform anything
as old-fashioned as that. I looked at Dr. Clayton, who, in
a low tone, asked, “Are you sure you can get through with
it?”
There was doubt in the tones of his voice which touched
my pride, and without deigning him an answer I took my
seat, resolving to do my best. The set was soon formed,
Dr. Clayton dancing with Dell Thompson, who remarked as
he led her away—“I suppose we shall have a rare performance.”
Something, I am sure, must have inspired me, for never
before did I play so well; keeping perfect time, and striking
every note distinctly. My audience were evidently both
surprised and pleased, for they called for piece after piece,
until my list was exhausted, when one of the gentlemen,
more thoughtful than the ladies, suggested the possibility
of my being tired.
“Perhaps she dances, too. Ask her, Bob,” said a young
lady, while Dell eagerly rejoined, “Oh, yes, do;” but Bob
was forestalled by Dr. Clayton, who, for several minutes,
had stood by my side, complimenting my playing, and who
now asked me to be his partner in the next cotillon, his
cousin having volunteered to take my place at the piano.
In my excitement I forgot my shoes, forgot everything,
save that Dr. Clayton’s eye was looking down upon me, that
my hand was resting in his, and ere I was aware of it, I
96found myself upon the floor. I was perfectly familiar with
the changes of the cotillon, but at my right was John
Thompson; who, when it came his turn to swing with me,
refused to take my hand, treating me with such marked
insolence that I became confused, and made several mistakes,
at which he laughed contemptuously. Besides this,
my big shoes incommoded me; and at last, in the midst of the
promenade, one of them dropped off, the cotton-ball rolled
out, I tripped, lost my balance, and after one or two headlong
plunges, fell flat at the feet of Dr. Clayton, who stood
aghast with surprise and mortification. It was ludicrous
enough, I know; but I do not think there was any necessity
for the loud roar which was raised over my mishap; and
burning with shame and vexation, I gathered myself up, and
fled from the room; but not until I heard Dell Thompson
say, as she picked up the shoe and passed it to Dr. Clayton,
“It is Mrs. Ross’s; she hadn’t any of her own, which she
thought suitable, and so she borrowed.”
“That accounts for the cotton-wad,” said John, dealing
said wad a kick that sent it bounding past me.
Rushing up the stairs, I found my shawl and bonnet; and
then, without a word to any one, started for home, minus
my shoe, which I entirely forgot in my excitement. I had
scarcely got outside the gate when the sound of a footstep
caused me to look around, and I saw Dr. Clayton, his hat
in one hand and Mrs. Ross’s slipper in the other. This
last he passed to me, and then without a word drew my
arm within his, and for a time we walked on in silence, while
I cried as if my heart would break. Coming at last to an
old oak tree, under which a rude bench had been constructed,
he bade me sit down; and placing himself by my
side, asked me, “What was the matter?”
“You know well enough what’s the matter,” I said
97angrily, struggling to rise; but his arm was strong, and he
held me fast, while he tried to quiet me, and in this he soon
succeeded, for he possessed over me a power which I could
not resist.
Gradually, as I grew calm, I told him all; how I believed
that Dell Thompson had invited me only to ridicule me,
how she had asked me to come in the afternoon, and then
made fun of me for doing so; while her companions called
me green; and that in the absence of my own slippers
I had worn those of Mrs. Ross; thereby meeting with
the worst catastrophe of all; to wit, the falling flat in the
dance!
Here I broke down entirely, and cried out aloud; while
the doctor, after one or two hearty laughs at my distress, tried
again to comfort me, asking me what I cared for Dell
Thompson’s ridicule. “She wasn’t worth minding,” he
said, “and no one who knows her would attach any importance
to her remarks.”
“But what makes her treat me so?” I asked; “I never
harmed her.”
For a time the doctor said nothing; but the arm, which
all the time had encircled my waist, drew me still closer to
his side, while he at last replied, “she is jealous of you—jealous
because she thinks I like the little Rose better than
I do her.”
“And it’s very foolish in her to think so,” I exclaimed.
Again the doctor was silent, but by the light of the full
moon I saw that there was a curious train of thought passing
through his mind, but it did not manifest itself in words;
for when he again spoke, it was merely to reply, “Yes, very
foolish;” then, after another pause, he added, “and still
I know of no reason why I should like her best—do you?”
“Yes,” I answered quickly, “there are many reasons.
98She is handsome; I am homely. She is graceful; I am
awkward. She is rich; I am poor”——
“She is artificial; you are truthful;” said he, interrupting
me, while, without paying any heed to this remark,
I continued, “she is a young lady, and I am a little girl—only
thirteen.”
“I wish you were older, Rose,” said he, “and had seen
a little more of the world.”
Then followed a long conversation in which much was
said, which had far better been left unsaid; for I was
a warm-hearted, impulsive child, believing that I to him
was what he was to me. And still he did not once commit
himself, nor in what he said was there aught which could
possibly have been construed into an avowal of anything
save friendship, which was the theme upon which he rang
many a change. Alas, for such friendships! They are
dangerous to one’s peace of mind, particularly if told beneath
an old oak tree, with the silvery moonlight shining
down upon you, and the soft summer air gently moving the
green leaves above your head. How long we sat there I
do not know; but I was the first to propose going, telling
him they would miss him at the party, and wonder at his
absence.
“Let them wonder then,” said he; “I have no intention
of returning to the house. It would be intolerable after
this pleasant chat with you, so I shall just get my horse and
go quietly home.”
I did not then know that he had not sufficient courage to
brave the jokes and jeers which he knew were sure to greet
him, should he return to Captain Thompson’s. Neither did
I know that with his fashionable friends he would scarcely
dare defend me; nor that when John Thompson once, in
his presence, imitated the way in which I stumbled and fell,
99he joined in the laugh which followed; saying, though as if
in apology, “that it was too bad to make fun of me, for I
was quite a nice little girl.”
We found Mrs. Ross sitting up for me, sleeping in her
chair, while the tallow candle at her side had burned and
spluttered away, until the black, crisped wick was longer
than the candle itself.
“Lordy massy! doctor, is that you?” she exclaimed, rubbing
open her eyes and hooking up her dress, which, for
comfort, she had loosened. “I thought, mebby, you’d beau
Rosa home. Come in and stay a spell. I’d as lief you’d
spark it awhile in t’other room as not!”
But the doctor had no idea of doing anything so marked
as that; and with a whispered good night to me, and an audible
one to Mrs. Ross, he departed; just as the good lady
asked me, loud enough for him to hear, “if I’d dirtied her
stockings, lost her mitts, or broken her breastpin?”
CHAPTER VIII. CLOSE OF SCHOOL IN PINE DISTRICT.
100
Whether Dr. Clayton cared for me or not, he exerted
his influence in my behalf, plainly telling John Thompson
that he ought to be ashamed to annoy me as he did; and
dropping a few hints to Mrs. Thompson, who now tried to
restrain her son; so that after the party, hostilities in that
quarter nearly ceased. But the ball was in motion, and
could not well be stopped; for what the Thompsons now
lacked, the rest of the District made up. It was the general
impression, I believe, that the scholars had learned nothing
save a few pieces of poetry; and that I had done nothing
but whip, scold, and cry. To all these accusations I plead
guilty; and when Mr. Randall, one day, proposed to me to
bring my labors to a close, I replied that “nothing could
please me better,” though there was a tremor in my voice as
I thought how the people of Meadow Brook would laugh.
Mr. Randall, probably, divined my thoughts, for he quickly
rejoined, “The weather is gettin’ so hot that the youngsters
need a vacation. Mebby, in the fall, when it is cooler, we
shall have you back.”
And so it was settled that school should close the next
week on Saturday, and that on Friday I should have an
examination! This, to a teacher in Western New York, may
seem strange; but those who have taught in that part of
101New England where I did, know that such a thing cannot
well be avoided. No matter how small the school, or how
inefficient the teacher may be, an examination must be held,
or you at once lose caste; the people unanimously declaring
you to be ashamed of showing how little your pupils have
learned. In my case, I was rather anxious than otherwise
for an opportunity to show off; for I was sure my scholars
would acquit themselves creditably. I well knew they
could stand up and repeat “verses,” the multiplication table,
the names of the fourteen counties of Massachusetts, and
tell who made them, and where the sun rose, louder and
faster than any other seventeen children in town! I confidently
expected all the parents and friends to be there, and
as my own wardrobe was rather scanty, I coaxed my sister
Anna, who, though several years my senior, was still not
much taller than myself, to let me wear her new black silk!
It was my first appearance in a long dress, and it troubled
me greatly; but by dint of holding it up, as ladies do now-adays,
I succeeded in getting to the schoolhouse, where I
found my pupils arrayed in their best; Ike Ross having in
his shirt bosom the selfsame glass breastpin which I had
sported at Dell Thompson’s party. Not wishing the spectators
to lose any of the exercises, I sat in grim silence,
awaiting their arrival: but my waiting was all in vain; for,
with the exception of Mrs. Randall and Dr. Clayton, the
latter of whom came in the capacity of Inspector, not a single
individual was present! Not a parent—not a friend,
nor a foe—and still, if the examination had not been held,
those who stayed away would have ridiculed me, and voted
my school even a worse failure than they did. So much for
consistency. Parents, I think, are not sufficiently aware of
the great good their occasional presence in the schoolroom
will do, both to teacher and scholar; the latter of whom will
102almost invariably study harder and strive to have better
lessons, if there is a prospect of their father or mother’s
hearing them recite; while the former, feeling that an interest
is taken in them, will also be incited to fresh efforts for
the improvement of those committed to their charge.
But not thus thought the people of Pine Hill. Satisfied
that an examination was going on, they stayed at
home, expressing their surprise when they heard that nobody
was there, wondering what it meant, and saying
“folks ought to be ashamed for not going!” As if to make
amends for their neglect, Dr. Clayton, in his closing remarks,
said some very complimentary things concerning my
school, which he bade the children repeat to their parents;
and such is human nature, that, when I had received my
Eight Dollars, and was gone, the District, in speaking of
me, said, “I wasn’t the worst teacher, after all.”
About four o’clock, there came up a thunder shower,
which caused both Mrs. Randall and the scholars to hasten
home. Dr. Clayton, on the contrary, was in no hurry.
“It was, perhaps, the last opportunity he would have of
seeing me,” he said, “and he meant to improve it.”
It was not very far to Meadow Brook I thought, and so
I at last ventured to say.
“I know that,” he replied; “but people might talk were
I to call on you, and I do not wish to do anything which
will affect you unpleasantly.”
“I don’t care what folks say,” arose to my lips, but its
utterance was prevented by a flash of lightning and a thunder
crash, which made me shriek aloud, while I covered my
face with my hands.
I shall not describe the way which Dr. Clayton took to
calm my fright, for all who have passed through a similar
experience can imagine it; but the remembrance of that
103thunder-storm lingered in my memory long after I had forgotten
the night when I sat with him in the soft moonlight
beneath the old oak tree. When the storm had ceased and
the sun was again shining on the tree-tops at the west, he
left me, placing on my hand at parting a little gold ring, on
which was inscribed, simply, “Rose.”
“It was the gift of friendship,” he said—“nothing more;”
and he wished me to wear it “for the sake of the few pleasant
hours we had spent together.”
I suppose it was wrong in me to accept it. I thought so
then, but I could not refuse it; and remembering the fate of
the one sent by Herbert Langley to Anna, I resolved upon
keeping it a secret, and only wearing it when I was alone.
For a long time I sat in the deserted schoolroom, while the
damp air, which came through the open window, fell upon
my uncovered neck and arms, nor was I reminded of the
lapse of time until it began to grow dark around me; then
hastily throwing on my things, I started for Mr. Randall’s,
wetting my feet, for I had no rubbers with me. As the result
of this, when I awoke next morning I was conscious of
a pain in my head, a soreness in my throat, and an aching of
my back, quite as unexpected as it was disagreeable. I had
taken a violent cold, and Mrs. Randall, when she saw how
pale I was and how faint I appeared, said I must not go to
school. George, she said, would go and tell the scholars,
and I must stay there until my father came for me at night,
as had been arranged the week before. To this plan I
finally yielded, and all the day long I hovered over the fire,
which, in the little sitting-room, was kindled for my comfort.
At night, when my father came for me, I was almost too
weak to stand alone; but the excitement of riding imparted
to me an artificial strength, which wholly deserted me the
moment I reached home, and for many days I kept my bed,
104attended by Dr. Clayton, who accidently heard of my illness,
and who came daily to see me. Grandma, who was something
of a nurse, proposed several times that he be dismissed,
saying he only made me worse, for I was always more feverish
and restless after one of his visits! But the doctor, to
whom she one day made the suggestion, said he should
not leave me until I was well, and when she asked him how
he accounted for my rapid pulse and flushed cheeks, whenever
he was present, he very gravely replied, that “possibly
my heart might be affected—the symptoms seemed much like
it,” adding, as he saw the look of concern on grandma’s face,
“but I think I can cure that, don’t you, Rose?” turning to
me, and taking my hand to see how fast my pulse did beat!
After this, grandma made no further objections to his
visits. “If Rose had the heart disease, and he could cure
it, he ought to do so!”
But, alas! for the heart disease, which feeds upon the smile
of one who, when sure that he holds it in his grasp, casts it
from him, as children do a long coveted toy, of which they
have grown weary.
CHAPTER IX. PRO AND CON.
105
On a pleasant May morning, in the spring succeeding the
events narrated in the last chapter, the door of Dr. Clayton’s
office was locked against all intruders. The shutters
were closed; while within, with his feet upon a table and his
hands clasped over his head, the doctor himself was revolving
the all-important question—whether it were better
to offer himself at once to Dell Thompson “and have it done
with,” or to wait a few years for a little girl, who had recently
crossed his pathway, leaving on his memory footprints
he could not easily efface. For the benefit of any young
men who may be similarly situated, we give a portion of his
reasoning, as follows:
“Now, I am as positive as a man need be that I can
have either of them for the asking; therefore, in a case
which involves the happiness of one’s whole life, it behooves
me to consider the matter well. To be sure, if I follow the
bent of my inclination, I am decided at once; but then, marriages
of convenience sometimes prove just as pleasant as
those of pure love; and so I’ll go over with the pros and cons
of both, deciding upon the one which has the most of the
former!
“First, then, there’s Rose, a most beautiful name. Only
think how refreshing it would be after riding ten or twelve
106miles, visiting farmer Stubbs or widow Grubbs, to know
there was a Rose watching for your return. Yes, her name
is in her favor.”
Here the hands came down from the head, and wrote one
pro against the name of Rose, after which they resume their
former position, and the doctor goes on with his soliloquy:
“She is frank, artless, unassuming, means what she says—in
short, she is perfectly natural, and I always feel refreshed
after a talk with her.” (Makes pro number 2.) “Then
she is so wholly unselfish in her affection for me—loves me
so devotedly—sees no fault in me whatever—thinks me
handsome, I dare say, and all that.”
Here glancing at himself in a little mirror opposite, and
smoothing his shining moustache, the doctor waxes eloquent
on said Rose’s supposed admiration for him, writing down,
in the heat of his excitement two pros, making in all four!
Verily, Rosa Lee, your prospect of becoming Mrs. Dr. Clayton
is brightening fast. But to proceed:
“She is smart, intelligent, talented, writes poetry—and,
with proper training, would perhaps make a distinguished
writer. Were I sure on this point, I should not hesitate;
but you can’t tell what these precocious children will make;
frequently they come to a stand-still.”
And here, to make the matter sure, he writes against her
name one pro for what she possibly may be, and one con for
what she probably will not be!
“Then I love her better than anything else in the known
world. I do, that’s a fact; but she’s young—only fourteen—and
before she’s old enough to marry she may change
forty times, and that would kill me dead.”
Puts down one pro for his own love, and one con for Rose’s
possible inconstancy.
“But she is poor—or, her father, they say, is worth
107only about $5,000! He already has nine children, and
there’s time enough for three or four more:—thirteen into
five thousand makes—Long Division, a rule I never fancied;
too poor altogether!”
And against Rose’s name there is con No. 3, long and
black, with the shadow of her four unborn brothers, who, by
the way, never came in for a share of the $5,000.
“Then her family connections, I do not suppose, are such
as would add anything to my influence. Good, respectable
people, no doubt, but not known in the world like the Hungerfords,
Dell Thompson’s maternal relatives. To be sure,
I once heard Rose speak of an uncle who resides in Boston,
but I dare say he’s some grocer or mechanic, living on a
back street; while Dell’s uncle, from the same city, must be
a man of wealth and importance, judging by the figure his
wife cuts when she visits the captain.”
Here Dell received a pro for the Hungerford blood flowing
in her veins, while Rose had a con for the want of said
Hungerford blood.
“Dell, too, has $10,000 of her own, or rather will have,
when her grandmother dies; and there are not many young
men who can jump into that fortune every day. Yes,
$10,000 is a decided temptation.”
And lest Rose, who already numbered six, should come
out in the majority, three long marks were put down against
the $10,000 to be inherited at the death of a grandmother,
whose name Dell bore.
“Then Dell has an air, which shows at once what she is,
and no man need be ashamed of her in any place.” (Mark
No. 5.) “Then, again, she’s handsome—decidedly so—such
beautiful eyes! such small feet! and curls!”
Here a vague remembrance of certain long shoes, with
wads of cotton, versus French slippers and silken hose, arose
108before the man of the world, resulting in a pro for the slippers,
and a con for the cotton!
“But Dell is deceitful—high-tempered—artificial—selfish
superficial—and all that! The other picture suits me best,
or would, were it not for the Hungerford blood, and the
$10,000. Let me see how it foots up:—Six pros for Dell,
and the same number for Rose.”
Here was a dilemma; but anon he remembered how awkwardly
the last mentioned young lady looked, when she fell
at his feet—and this decides the matter. He is sensitive
to ridicule, very, and he could not endure the sneering
remarks which an avowed attachment to her might call forth
from the world of fashion; so he crosses one of the pros
which he had written against her name, when he thought
how much she admired him—and then it stands, Dell 6;
Rose 5!
Thus was the die cast. Alas! for the young girl, who,
that same spring morning, stole away to her accustomed
haunt, the old grape-vine, whose swelling buds were not an
unfit symbol of the bright hopes now springing in her glad
heart. As she sits there alone, with the running brook at
her feet, she thinks of him who has grown so strongly into
her love; and though, in words, he has never said so, by
ten thousand little acts he has told her that her affection
was returned, and for his sake she wishes she was older.
He has wished so too, in her presence, many a time; but as
that cannot be, she resolves to spend the season of her childhood
in making herself what she knows he would wish her
to be, were she to share his lot in life; and then, when the
lapse of years shall have ripened her into womanhood, she
thinks how she can, without shame, put her hand in his, and
go forth into the world satisfied, though it brought her
naught but care, if he were only with her.
109Alas, for thee, Rosa! A few miles to the southward, and
the same sun which now shines softly down on you, looks in
through a richly curtained window, and its golden rays fall
on the queenly form of your rival; who, with a look of exultation
on her finely cast features, listens to the words she has
long waited to hear, and which have now been spoken;
while he, of whom you dream, bends gently over her, his
own—his betrothed! And still, in the very moment of his
triumph, there comes up before him a pale, childish face,
which, with its dreamy eyes of blue, looks reproachfully upon
him. But pride and ambition weave together a veil with
which hides the image from his view, bidding him forget
that any other save the peerless Dell, e’er stirred the
fountain of his love.
Would it be well for us always to know what is passing
in the minds of our friends, whether present or absent? I
think not; and still, could Rosa Lee have known what had
transpired, methinks she would not have darted away so
quickly as she did, when told that Dr. Clayton was coming
through the gate one afternoon, about six weeks after his
engagement with Dell. Why she ran, she could not tell,
except it were, as her brother Charlie said, that “gals
always run off and spit on their hair, when they saw their
beaux coming.”
Homely as this expression is, there was in this case some
truth in it; for, though Rose did not spit upon her hair,
she went to her room and brushed it, winding one or two
of the rougher curls about her finger, then taking from its
hiding-place the ring, his gift, she placed it upon her finger,
and with heightened color went down to greet the doctor,
who had come to make his farewell visit—for, four weeks
from that night, Dell Thompson would be his wife. Long
110had he debated the propriety of seeing Rose again, conscience
bidding him leave her alone, while inclination clamored
loudly for one more quiet talk with her, one more
walk by moonlight, one more look into her childish face,
and then he would leave her forever; never again suffering
a thought of her to come between him and the bride of his
choice.
And for this purpose he had come; but when he saw how
joyfully Rose met him, and how the bloom deepened on her
usually pale cheek, his heart misgave him, and for the first
time, he began to realize the wrong he had done her. But
it was now too late to remedy it, he thought; and as if bent
upon making matters still worse, he asked her to accompany
him in a walk down the green lane, to the haunts he knew
she loved the best, and where they had more than once been
before. Oh, that walk!—how long it lingered in the
memory of Rose, for never before had the doctor’s manner
been so marked, or his words so kind as when together they
sat upon the moss-grown bank, beneath the spreading vine,
while he talked to her of the past, of the happiness he had
experienced in her society, and which he said would be
one of the few green spots, to which, in the years to come, he
should look back with pleasure. Then drawing her so
closely to him that her head almost rested upon his shoulder,
he asked of her the privilege of “once kissing her before
they parted”——he did not say forever, but the rustling
leaves and the murmuring brook whispered it in her ear as
she granted his request, shuddering the while, and wondering
at the strangeness of his manner. Possibly he had it in
his mind to tell her, but if so, he found himself unequal to the
task, and he left her without a word of the coming event,
of which she had not the slightest suspicion.
CHAPTER X. MRS. DR. CLAYTON.
111
Although Meadow Brook and Pine District were distant
from each other only four or five miles, there was between
the two neighborhoods but little communication; and this,
added to the fact that Aunt Sally Wright was confined to
her bed, was undoubtedly the reason why the news of the
approaching nuptials did not reach us until the week before
the time appointed for them to take place. It was a warm
sultry day in July, that Aunt Sally, who was now convalescent,
sent us word that she would visit us that afternoon,
if it was perfectly convenient; the little girl who
brought the message, adding that “Miss Wright said Miss
Lee needn’t put herself out an atom, as she wan’t a bit
particular what she ett.”
Of course it was convenient, and about one o’clock she
came, talkative and full of news as ever. I was suffering
from a severe headache, which, during the morning, had kept
me confined to the bed; but knowing how much Aunt Sally
would have to tell, and feeling curious to hear it all, I went
down to the sitting-room, where her first exclamation was,
“Now do tell what makes you look so down in the mouth?”
I was about to tell her of my headache, when she prevented
me by continuing—“But law! it’s no wonder, seein’
you’ve lost the doctor slick and clean.”
112A dim foreshadowing of the truth came over me, but with
a strong effort, I controlled my feelings, and in a very indifferent
manner, asked her what she meant.
“Now I’ll give up,” said she, “if you hain’t heerd on’t.
Why, it’s in everybody’s mouth. They are to be married
next Thursday night, at nine o’clock; and the dress is white
satin, with a veil that comes most to the floor.”
“Who is to be married?” asked Anna, eagerly, her
interest all awakened by the mention of white satin and lace
veils.
“Why, Dr. Clayton and Dell Thompson;” returned Aunt
Sally. “They was published last Sunday; Andy Slosson
see it himself and told me. They are goin’ first out to
York State, to see them great Falls, and then they are goin’
to live in Boston, boardin’ at some of them big taverns; and
Dell has got six bran new gowns a-purpose to wear to
breakfast.”
Here Aunt Sally paused for breath, while Anna asked
who was invited, and if it was to be a large wedding.
“I don’t know how large,” said Aunt Sally, “but it’s
pretty likely all the upper crust’ll be there. I hain’t been
invited, ’cause they think I’m sick, I s’pose,—but goodness
alive! look at Rosa!” she continued, pointing towards me,
who, weary and faint, had lain my head upon the window-stool.
“She’s got the sick headache,” said Anna, while Lizzie,
with a delicate tact, for which in my heart I blessed her,
came up to me, saying, “I don’t believe you are able to sit
up; I’d go to bed.”
Glad of any excuse to be alone, I left the room, going to
my chamber, where I wept myself to sleep. When I awoke
the sun had set, but I heard the voices of the family below,
and once when I thought I caught the sound of Dr.
113Clayton’s name, I involuntarily stopped my ears to shut out
the sound. A moment after, the door of my room was
softly opened, and Carrie came stealing in on tiptoe.
Learning that I was awake, she advanced towards me, holding
to view a note, which she said had been left there for
me by Captain Thompson’s hired man, and was an invitation
to the wedding! It was still sufficiently light for me to see,
and leaning upon my elbow, I read on a card, that Mrs.
Thompson would be “at home” from eight to eleven on the
evening of the 25th, while in the corner were the names of
“Dr. Clayton and Dell Thompson.”
There was no longer a shadow of hope!—it was all true,
and he had insulted me with an invitation to witness his
marriage with another! I did not know then, as I afterwards
did, that the invitation was purposely sent by Dell to
annoy me! For a moment I forgot my headache in my
anger, but ere long it returned in all its force, and if the
next day my headache continued with unabated severity, it
was not without a sufficient cause, for sleepless nights are
seldom conducive to one’s health. Of course I did not
attend the wedding, which was said to have been a brilliant
affair; the bride and the table looking beautifully, while the
bridegroom, it was rumored, was pale and nervous, making
the responses in a scarcely audible tone of voice.
The next morning, between eight and nine o’clock, as I
was on my way to school, I met the travelling carriage
of Capt. Thompson, which was taking the newly married
couple to the dépôt. John was driving, while on the back
seat, with his arm partly around his bride, was the doctor.
My first impulse was not to look at them, but this act pride
forbade, and very civilly I returned the nod of Dell, and the
polite bow of the doctor, whose face turned crimson when he
saw me. A moment more, and a turn of the road hid them
114from my view; then seating myself upon a large flat stone,
beneath a tree, where were the remains of a play-house built
by my own hands only the autumn before, I cried out loud,
thinking myself the most wretched of beings, and wondering
if ever any one before had such trouble as I! As nearly as
I am able to judge, I was taking my first lesson in love-sickness;
a kind of disease which is seldom dangerous, but, like
the toothache, very disagreeable while it lasts. At least I
found it so, and for weeks I pined away with a kind of sentimental
melancholy, which now appears to me wholly foolish
and ridiculous; for were I indeed the wife of Dr. Clayton,
instead of Rosa Lee, this book would undoubtedly never
have been written; while in place of bending over the inkstand
this stormy morning, as I am doing, I should probably
have been engaged in washing, dressing, scolding, and cuffing
three or four little Claytons, or in the still more laudable
employment of darning the socks and mending the trousers (a
thing, by the way, which I can’t do) of said little Claytons’
sire; who, by this time, would, perhaps, have ceased to call
me “his Rose,” bestowing upon me the less euphonious title
of “she,” or “my woman?”
But not thus did I reason then. I only knew that I had
lost him and was very unhappy. Many a long walk I took
alone in the shadowy woods, singing to myself snatches of
love-songs, particularly the one containing the following:
“I have not loved lightly—
I’ll think of thee yet,
And I’ll pray for thee nightly.
Till life’s sun is set.”
Somehow, too, I got the impression that my heart was
all broken to pieces; and this fact satisfactorily settled, I
began to take a melancholy pleasure in brooding over my
115early death, and thinking how Dr. Clayton would feel, when
he heard the sad news! Almost every week I was weighed,
feeling each time a good deal chagrined to find that I was
not losing flesh as fast as a person in a decline would naturally
do. In this state of affairs, I one day came across a
little sketch of Hannah More, in which her early disappointment
was described, and forthwith I likened myself to her,
and taking courage from her example, I finally concluded
that if I could not have the doctor I could at least write for
the newspapers, and some day I might perhaps be able to
make a book. This, I thought, would amply atone for my
loss—an opinion which I hold still, for if ever I do see myself
in a book, and the reviews let me alone, which, in consideration
of all I have suffered, I am sure they will do, I shall
consider it a most fortunate circumstance that Dell’s
$10,000, in prospect, proved a stronger temptation than my
father’s $5,000 divided by thirteen!
CHAPTER XI. BOSTON.
116
The bridal party had returned from the Falls, and after
spending a week or more at Capt. Thompson’s the doctor
took down his sign, boxed up his books, pills, powders, and
skeleton, which some called his ’natomy, while Dell packed up
her six morning gowns with hosts of other finery, and then
one day in August they started for Boston; where the doctor
hoped for a wider field of labor, fully expecting to be
aided by the powerful influence of Mr. Marshall, his wife’s
uncle, whose high station in the city he never once doubted.
For this opinion he had, as the world goes, some well founded
reasons; for not only did Dell often quote “my Aunt
Marshall of Boston,” but the lady herself also managed to
impress the people of Pine District with her superiority over
them, and her great importance at home. Notwithstanding
that she frequently spent several weeks at Capt. Thompson’s,
she still could not endure the country—“the people were so
vulgar—’twas so dull there, and no concerts, no operas, no
theatres, no star actors, no parties, and more than all, no
dear, delightful old Common, with its shaded walks and velvet
grass.”
Of course Dr. Clayton, in thinking of her city home, fancied
to himself a princely mansion on Beacon street, overlooking
the “dear, delightful old Common,” and it is scarcely
117more than natural that his heart expanded with some little
degree of pride, as he saw in contemplation the dinner
parties, evening parties, soirées, etc., which he confidently
expected to attend at said princely mansion. At first he had
entertained a faint hope that he might possibly board with
his new uncle; but this idea was instantly repelled by his
wife, who did not seem so much inclined to talk of her “city
Aunt” as formerly. So it was decided that they should for
a time take rooms at the Tremont.
It was a dark, rainy night when they arrived, and as it
was cold for the season, their rooms seemed cheerless and
dreary, while, to crown all, the bride of six weeks was undeniably
and decidedly out of temper; finding fault with
everything, even to her handsome husband, who fidgeted and
fussed, brought her the bottle of hair oil instead of cologne,
stepped on her linen travelling dress with his muddy boot,
spit in the grate instead of the spit-box, breathed in her face
when he knew how she disliked tobacco, thought of Rosa
Lee, and wondered if she were ever cross (“nervous” Dell
called it), thought not, and almost wished—no, didn’t wish
anything, but as an offset thought of the $10,000, asked Dell
how old her grandmother was, received for an answer, “I
don’t know and I don’t care;” after which he went down stairs
and regaled himself with a cigar until informed that supper
was ready. Ate all alone, Dell refusing to go down—found
her in tears on returning to his room, was told that she
“was homesick, and wished she’d never come.” He began
to wish so too, but said “she’d feel better by and by.” Sat
for an hour or more cross-legged listening to the rain, and
wondering if there was a cure for nervousness; finally went
to bed and dreamed of Rosa Lee and the moonlight night,
when they sat under the old oak tree, and of the thunder-storm
when he gave her the little gold ring.
118The next morning Mrs. Doctor Clayton was all smiles, and
when, with her handsome eyes, shining hair, and tasteful
wrapper, she descended to the breakfast-room, she attracted
much attention, and more than one asked who she was, as
they turned for a second glance. Nothing of this escaped
the doctor, and with a glow of pride he forgot the vexations
of the night previous, and gave vent to a mental pshaw!
as he thought of his dream; for well he knew that the little
plain-faced Rosa could not compare with the splendid woman
at his side. Breakfast being over, he ventured to suggest
the possibility of their soon receiving a call from her aunt;
but Dell hastily replied, that such a thing was hardly probable,
as her Aunt had her own affairs to attend to, and would
not trouble herself about them. The doctor’s hands went
into his pockets, and his eyes went over inquiringly to his
wife, who continued speaking rapidly, as if it were a painful
duty which she felt compelled to perform.
“I don’t know where you got the idea that Uncle Marshall
is such a great man—not from me, certainly. But got
it you have, and it’s time you knew the truth. He is a
good, honest man, I dare say, and respectable, too; but he is
not one of the ton, by any means. Why, he’s nothing more
nor less than a tailor, and earns his bread from day to
day.”
“But his wife”—interrupted the doctor—“how happens
it that she supports so much style?”
“Oh, that’s easily accounted for,” returned Dell. “They
have no children—she is fond of dress, and spends all she
can get for that purpose. She was an apprentice girl and
learned her trade in my uncle’s shop, and it is said, sometimes
helps him now when he is pressed hard.”
“Why did you never tell me this before?” asked the doctor,
his brow growing thoughtful.
119“And why should I tell you?” answered Dell. “What
did I suppose you cared whether he were a prince or a tailor.
You married me, I hope, for myself, and not for my relations.”
The doctor thought of the ten thousand dollars just in
time to force down the answer which sprang to his lips, and
which was far better to be unuttered; so, in its place, he
asked, “Where do they live?”
“On a back street, some distance from here,” said Dell;
adding, that their house, though small, was pleasant and
neatly furnished. “It is well enough in the country to have
a city Aunt on which to plume one’s self,” she continued,
laughingly; “but here, where she is known, I do not intend
having much intercourse with her, for a physician and tailor
will, of course, occupy entirely different positions. However,
I must treat her, at first, with a show of politeness,
and if you are so disposed, we’ll go round there and call this
morning.”
The doctor made no objections, and ere long they were walking
over the stony pavement towards R—— street, which, as
Dell had said, was rather out of the way. The house, however,
at which they stopped, was a pleasant little cottage,
with a nicely-kept yard in front, while the parlor, into which
they were shown, was quite tastefully furnished. Mrs. Marshall
herself answered their ring, appearing greatly surprised
when she saw them, but not more so than Doctor Clayton,
who would never have recognized the dashing lady of Pine
District in the plain-looking woman, who, in a cheap calico
wrapper, unbrushed hair, and checked apron, now sat before
him—his Aunt. And yet he could not help thinking her far
more agreeable than he had ever seen her before. The truth
was, that Mrs. Marshall was one of those weak-minded women
who, being nothing at home, strove to make amends by
120“making believe” abroad; assuming everything in the latter
and nothing in the former condition. Consequently, she,
who in the country was proud and overbearing, affecting
ignorance of the most trivial matters, was, at home, a comparatively
quiet, domestic woman; doing her own work, and,
aside from being a little jealous and envious of her more fortunate
neighbors, generally minding her own business.
After the first flutter of meeting the doctor was over, she
became herself again, and set about entertaining them to the
best of her ability, inviting them to stay with her to dinner,
and urging as an inducement, that she was going to have
“peaches and cream for dessert.” But Dell rather haughtily
declined, whereupon her aunt asked “when she would come
round and spend the day?” saying, “she must do so before
long, or they might not be in that house.”
“Not be in this house! Why not?” asked Dell; and
Mrs. Marshall replied, “Why, you know, we have always
rented it of Mr. Lee, and he talks of selling it.”
Instantly the doctor thought of Rosa, and involuntarily
repeated the name—“Lee—Lee”——
“Yes,” said Mrs. Marshall. “He has a brother in Meadow
Brook, whom you may know.”
“Is he wealthy?” asked the doctor.
“Why, ye-es, I s’pose so,” said Mrs. Marshall, hesitatingly,
as if unwilling to admit what she could not deny.
“He lives in a big house on Beacon street—keeps his carriage—and
they say the curtains in the front parlor cost a
thousand dollars, and there are only two windows either.”
Here she cast a deprecating glance towards her own very
prettily embroidered muslin curtains, which probably cost
about a hundredth part of that sum. Soon after, the newly
married pair arose to go, the doctor feeling, in spite of
himself, a little uncomfortable, though at what he hardly
121knew; for he would not acknowledge to himself that he was
at all disappointed because Dell’s uncle was a tailor instead
of a millionaire, or because Rose’s uncle lived on Beacon
street, and sported curtains which cost a thousand dollars.
This did not in the least affect Dell. She was his wife, and
as such he would love and cherish her, ministering as far as
possible to her wants, and overlooking the faults which he
knew she possessed. Thus reasoned his better nature as he
rode home, unconscious that the object of his thoughts was
at that very moment misconstruing his silence into disappointment,
and writing against him bitter things in her
heart.
It was a peculiarity of Dell’s to get angry when people
least expected it, and then to sulk until such time as she
saw fit to be gracious; so when they reached the Tremont,
the doctor was astonished to find her past speaking; neither
could he by any amount of coaxing elicit a word from her
for more than an hour. At the end of that time, however,
her pent-up wrath exploded; and, in angry tones, she
accused him of feeling sorry that he had married her,
because her uncle didn’t prove to be a great man as he had
supposed.
“I saw it all in your face when we were in the omnibus,”
said she; “it is of no use for you to deny it,” adding, as she
burst into tears, “but you cannot regret your marriage
more than I do mine, and you needn’t feel so smart either,
for your father was a poor shoemaker in Maine, and when
you went to college you rang the bell in part payment of
your tuition.”
This was a phase of married life for which the doctor was
wholly unprepared, and during the first part of his wife’s
speech he stood confounded, but by the time she had
finished, his mind was pretty well made up to box her ears!
122This, however, he did not do, though he bade her “shut up
her head,” repenting the harsh words the moment they were
uttered, and having manliness enough to tell her so. Winding
his arm around her, he talked to her calmly and
rationally until she came out of her pet, and agreed “to
make up.” This process we leave to the imagination of the
reader, only suggesting that no one who saw the handsome,
loving pair, which half an hour after went down to dinner,
would have dreamed of the dark cloud which had so recently
lowered on their matrimonial horizon.
Here, wishing the doctor success in procuring patients,
we leave them for a time, while we go back to Meadow
Brook, where our house was one day thrown into
a state of unusual excitement by the arrival of a letter
from Aunt Charlotte, which contained an invitation for
Anna and myself to spend the remainder of the autumn and
the whole of the coming winter with her in the city.
“Rosa,” she wrote, “could go to school, while Anna would
be introduced into society.”
Of course we were greatly surprised, wondering what had
come over our haughty aunt, who, as the reader will
recollect, once spent a Thanksgiving with us. She must have
changed, we thought, or else there was some mistake about
the invitation. But this could not be, for there it was in
black and white, written evidently in all sincerity, while
added to it was a postscript from Uncle Joseph, who also
joined in the request. That, if nothing more, proved that
the invitation was genuine, for there was no mistaking
my uncle’s peculiar handwriting, and it only remained for
us to decide whether we would accept or not. Anna and
myself said “Yes,” at once, and after a grave deliberation
in grandma’s room, the same conclusion was also reached by
123my parents, who, after giving us abundance of good advice,
(not a word of which I heard, as I was wondering if I
should ever meet the doctor and Dell), enjoined it upon
Anna, first, never to dance at the parties which she might
sometimes attend; second, never to wear her dresses
indecently low, as some of the city girls did; and third, not
to flirt with Herbert Langley. For this last injunction they
probably fancied there was little need, it being now five
years since she had seen him, and as they knew nothing of
the perfumed, gilt-edged notes which lay hidden in her work-box,
they very naturally supposed she had forgotten him.
I thought so, too, for hers was the last letter, which had
been unanswered for many months, and Anna, I knew, was
far too proud to care for one who had forgotten her.
Occasionally we had heard of him through others, and it
was always the same story, viz., that he was going down to
a drunkard’s grave, as fast as daily drams and weekly sprees
could carry him; but if these reports produced any effect
upon Anna, it was imperceptible. She was now twenty
years of age, and was a fair, delicate looking girl, whom
some called proud, others cold, and a few selfish; but this last
I deny, for though she might appear so to strangers, there
was not in our whole family, if I except brother Charlie, one
who would sacrifice more of their own comfort for that of
another than would my sister Anna; neither was there one
whom I loved better, for though she was six years my
senior, she always treated me as one nearer her own age,
while I looked up to her as my oracle, thinking that whatever
she did must necessarily be right.
When it was decided that we were to go, the next
important, and to me, most delightful task, was the looking
over and fixing up of our wardrobes, which kept us busy
for some time. As Anna was to go into society, she of
124course had nearly all the new things, and much as I loved
her, I must confess to a feeling of envy when I saw the
black silk, blue merino, crimson and brown delaine, etc.,
which were purchased for her, while I was put off with
her old dresses, “made over as good as new,” but when
I too, was presented with a blue merino by Charlie, who
was now a clerk in one of the Meadow Brook stores,
all my bad feelings left me, and with great alacrity I
assisted in the preparations.
It was a lovely day late in October, that old Sorrel
stood at the door ready to convey us to the dépôt. This
was the first time I had really left home, and when I saw
the tears in my mother’s eyes, and the trembling of
grandma’s whole body; when Juliet held me so long to her
bosom; when Lizzie and Carrie stole from me a hasty kiss,
and then ran off to hide their grief; when Charlie and John,
who were both clerks, came down to the dépôt to bid us
good-bye, affecting to be very manly, notwithstanding that
their chins quivered; and when, last of all, my father’s fervent
“God bless you, my children,” resounded in my ears, I began
to have a faint idea of the bitterness there is in parting, be
it but for a few months. As we expected, we found our
uncle’s carriage at the dépôt in Boston, and ere long we had
reached his house in Beacon street.
I remember the thrill of delight which I experienced,
when first I entered my Aunt Charlotte’s stylish house, and
felt that it was to be my home, at least for a time. Everything
was in perfect order, and for an instant I looked
around me in silent wonder, almost forgetting to reply to
the greeting of my aunt, who, in heavy brocade and long
blue streamers depending from her head, met us kindly and
hoped we were well. She had changed since last I saw her,
but it was more the work of care than of time. She was
125much thinner, and the crow-tracks around her eyes were
now decidedly deep-cut wrinkles, while her hair was here
and there streaked with more than one silver thread.
My uncle was still the same good-humored, pleasant man,
a little afraid of his wife, it may be, but evidently master of
his own house. I glanced around for Herbert, but he was
not there, and when, on Anna’s account more than my own,
I asked for him, I was told that he was down street, but
would soon be home. Ringing a bell, my aunt bade the
girl who appeared, “show the young ladies to their
rooms,” which proved to be a large airy chamber with a bedroom,
dressing-room, and closet adjoining. After a hasty
toilet we again returned to the parlor, where we found a
tall, richly dressed young man, whom I should never have
recognized as Herbert Langley. He was much altered from
when I last saw him: there was a deep flush on his cheeks,
which had reached even to his nose; while the eyes I had
once thought so handsome were watery and unsteady in
their movement. On the whole, however, he was still what
some would call good-looking. He was sitting with his back
to the door, but at the sound of our footsteps he turned
around, and coming towards us, welcomed us most cordially
to Boston, calling us “cousins,” and claiming a cousin’s privilege
of kissing us—me once, and Anna three times, if not
four.
She was a little piqued at his neglect in answering her last
letter, and wishing to show proper resentment, she drew
back rather haughtily, as if wondering how he dare “take
such liberties.” This he readily perceived, and instantly
assuming an air quite as indifferent as her own, he turned
towards me, hardly noticing her again, though it was easy
to see that the reserve of both was merely affectation. That
evening he was gone until nine o’clock, and when he entered
126the parlor, I noticed on the face of my aunt the same anxious
expression which I remembered having seen there, when
from our sitting-room window, she watched his return. But
he was perfectly sober, and with a sigh of relief, she resumed
her work; while he, coming round to my side, startled me by
saying that “he had just met with a friend of mine—Dr.
Clayton.”
“Where did you see him?” asked Anna, while I bent
lower over the book I was reading; for that name had still
a power to move me strongly.
“Why,” answered Herbert, “Tom Wilson, an old schoolmate
of mine, boards at the Tremont, where he is now lying
very sick. All the old physicians have given him up,
and so he has employed this Dr. Clayton, who, it seems, has
been at the same hotel for six weeks or more. I called on
Tom this evening, and while I was there Dr. Clayton came
in. In the course of our conversation he spoke of Meadow
Brook, and then, as a matter of course, I said there were
now in our family two young ladies from that place. When
I mentioned Rosa’s name, he turned almost as white as Tom
himself, and if she were not so young, I should be inclined to
think there was something between them. What do you
say, coz?”
Here Anna came to my aid, saying, “Why, he’s a married
man, and his wife is with him at the Tremont.”
“The dickens he is!” said Herbert, looking a little puzzled.
Then turning to his mother, he added, “Mother, you
ought to call on this Mrs. Clayton, for if she is an acquaintance
of Anna and Rosa, they will very naturally wish to see
her occasionally.”
“She needn’t call for me,” said I, quickly.
“Nor for me, for I don’t know her,” rejoined Anna, while
with a haughty toss of her head, Aunt Charlotte replied, that
127“her circle of acquaintances was quite large enough now,
and she’d no idea of extending it by taking in people about
whom she knew nothing.”
I know it was very wrong in me, but I could not help
straightening up a little in my chair as I wondered what the
proud Dell Thompson would say if she knew that the despised
Rosa Lee was living as an equal in a family which
looked down upon her and her husband as nobodies. I was
roused from my reverie by my aunt’s asking Herbert in a
low tone, “how Ada was to-night,” and glancing towards
him, I fancied that said Ada, whoever she might be, was
to him not a very pleasant subject just then, for his brow
darkened visibly, while he replied, “I never once thought to
inquire, but I dare say she’s no worse, or she would have
sent for you post haste.”
There was a moment’s silence, and then my aunt again
spoke, “Herbert, I wish you’d do better. You know how
lonely she is, and how much she must necessarily feel your
neglect.”
“Fudge!” was his answer, as he folded his hands over
his head, and leaning back in his chair, looked straight into
the astral lamp.
That night, when Anna and I were alone in our room, the
former sat for a time in deep thought, saying, when I at
last told her the clock was striking eleven, “I wonder who
Ada is!”
I wondered so, too, and my interest was not at all diminished
when the next morning, at the breakfast table, Aunt
Charlotte said to her son, “Herbert, I shall be busy this
morning making arrangements about a school for Rosa,
and I wish you’d go in and see Ada, will you?”
“Yes, yes, I will,” said he, rather impatiently, adding,
“and if I don’t find her any better, I mean to assume the
128responsibility of discharging that old superannuated greeny
who attends her, and install Dr. Clayton in his place. I took
quite a fancy to him, and I’m going to give him my patronage!”
“Oh, I wish you would!” I exclaimed involuntarily; for
in spite of the wrong he had done me, I cherished no feeling
of animosity towards him.
Then, again, I had heard that it was sometimes very difficult
for a young physician to obtain much practice in a
strange place with no one to help him, and I thought, perhaps,
Herbert’s “patronage” might be of some avail.
“I see,” said Herbert laughingly, “there has been
something, and though he is a married man, you still feel an
interest in him, and want him to succeed; all right, and I’ll
do what I can to help him; for I verily believe he’ll get Tom
on his legs again in spite of what the temperance folks say
about his blood’s being all turned into whisky!”
At these words a shadow passed over Aunt Charlotte’s
face, but it was soon chased away by the next remark of
Herbert, which was, “Ain’t you glad, mother, I reformed
before I got to be as bad as Tom? Why, girls (addressing
Anna and me), I haven’t drank a drop since—since—how
long is it mother, since I left off”—drinking he could not
say, so he finally added, “left off imbibing occasionally?”
There was a look of happiness on that mother’s face, as
she replied, “Almost a year.”
Yes, ’twas almost a year since her son had tasted ardent
spirits, and had she not good reasons for thinking he would
never fall again? Assured of this fact, how proud she
would have been of her only boy; for, aside from this great
error, he possessed many noble, generous qualities; and during
my stay in Boston, I found that, in spite of his well-known
habits, he was a pretty general favorite. Oh, how
129lovingly my aunt looked after him when he went out, and
how earnestly she watched him when he came in, and all
the while she was tempting him beyond what most men
could bear; for regularly on her dinner-table appeared either
porter, champagne, or madeira, one taste of which would
set him all on fire. But, unfortunately, she belonged to that
class of fashionable people who deem the wine-bottle a necessary
appendage to the dinner table, and if, in the sequel,
her son should fill a drunkard’s grave, would there be any
just cause why, in her anguish, she should murmur at Providence
for having dealt with her thus harshly? Ought she
not rather to blame herself for having thus daily tempted
him to sin by placing before him what she well knew was
sure to work his ruin?
But to our story. We were at dinner when Herbert came
in from his morning ramble, and taking his accustomed seat
at the table, he said to his mother, “I called on Ada as you
desired, and found her sitting up in a rose-colored dressing-gown,
which she thinks very becoming to her, I know, for
she sat directly opposite the mirror, and I should not dare
tell how many times I caught her casting admiring glances
at herself.”
Aunt Charlotte frowned, while Herbert, turning to me,
continued—“Miss Montrose is so much better that I don’t
believe I can patronize your doctor in that quarter, but I’ll
do something for him—break my leg, may be—or have the
delirium tremens.”
This species of jesting seemed to be a kind of mania with
Herbert, for almost every day of his life he referred to his
former habit of drinking, greatly to the annoyance of his
mother, who, on the occasion just mentioned, turned slightly
pale, while Anna looked down upon the carpet and sighed.
Thinking this as favorable an opportunity for making inquiries
130concerning Ada Montrose as I should have, I asked
Herbert who she was. His mother’s lips moved as if she
would answer the question, but ere she could speak, Herbert
replied, “She’s a Georgia lady, a great coquette, who is
spending the winter here with a fortieth cousin. Some call
her handsome, and I believe mother thinks her beautiful, but
if Anna paid as much attention to her toilet and dressed as
elegantly as Ada Montrose, she would, in my opinion, look
far better.”
’Twas the first compliment he had paid Anna since our
arrival, and it brought a bright flush to her usually marble
cheek; for Herbert Langley possessed a strange power over
my sister, which she did not try to resist. I fancied that
my aunt was not quite pleased with Herbert’s comparing
Miss Montrose to Anna, but ere she could frame any answer,
he asked us if we would like to attend the theatre that evening.
Notwithstanding my father’s hostility to circuses, I did
not remember having heard him say much against theatres,
and so I answered quickly, “Oh, yes, Anna, let’s go. I
want to see what they do.”
And so, with my aunt’s permission, it was settled that we
should go, and at the usual hour I found myself in the National
Theatre, which was densely crowded, for a celebrated
actress appeared that night for the last time in Boston.
Perfectly bewildered, I followed Herbert and Anna to my
uncle’s box, which commanded a fine view of the stage, and
then, when I became a little accustomed to the glare of
lights and the hum of voices, which in some degree reminded
me of that never-to-be-forgotten circus of Cousin Will memory,
I ventured to look over the sea of faces, half starting
from my seat as I recognized among the crowd Dr. Clayton
and his wife, the latter appearing to be looking at us
through what I thought resembled the dice boxes of a backgammon
131board tied together, but which I soon learned was
an opera-glass. The doctor was paler and thinner than
when I last saw him, and it was with more than one pang
that I watched him as, from time to time, he cast a glance
of pride at the splendid-looking woman at his side, who
attracted considerable attention, and at whom, in the course
of the evening, more than one glass was levelled.
Ere long my attention was diverted from them to a tall,
dark, and rather peculiar-looking gentleman, who entered
the box at our right. Sinking into a seat, he abandoned
himself apparently, to his own thoughts, which could not
have been very pleasant; for his forehead, which was high
and white, seemed at times to be one mass of wrinkles, while
his eyes, large, black, and deepset in his head, alternately
flashed with anger and vexation. I am not much of a physiognomist,
but there was in the face of the stranger something
which at once attracted and riveted my attention.
He was not handsome, like Dr. Clayton—nay, I am not sure
but many would call him ugly, but I did not; and, somehow, I
felt certain that no girl of fourteen had ever wept over his
fickleness, for he looked the soul of honor and integrity.
Gradually, too, as the play proceeded, the expression which
I had at first observed passed away; his dark eyes lighted
up; and when, at last, a bright smile broke over his face, I
pronounced him far better looking than the doctor, who was
fast losing ground in my good opinion.
The play was the “Lady of Lyons,” and though I was
familiar with the story, I seemed now to hear it for the first
time; so fully did I enter into the feelings of the heroine,
Pauline, whose distress I could not believe was feigned.
All was real to me; and I can now scarcely repress a smile,
as I recall to mind how I must have looked, standing
there with flushed cheeks, clasped hands, staring eyes, and
132lips slightly apart, drinking in every word of the actress.
Once Anna pulled my dress, whispering to me, “Do sit
down, Rosa; they are all looking at you, and Mrs. Clayton
is laughing and pointing you out to her husband.”
“I didn’t care for Dell Thompson, or the doctor either,”
and so I said, while at the same time I glanced towards the
stranger, whose eyes were fixed upon me with an expression
I could not fathom.
He was not making fun of me, I was sure of that; but as
if there were a magnetic influence in his look, which I could
not resist, I dropped into my seat, and remained motionless
until the closing scene, where, with a piercing shriek, Pauline
rushed into the arms of her husband. Then there came
over me the same sensation which I had experienced years
before in the old schoolhouse at Meadow Brook. Everything
grew dark around me, and with a faint cry I fell across
Anna’s lap. I was not entirely unconscious, for I have a
dim remembrance of being led from the heated room, the
close atmosphere of which had probably helped to bring on
my faintness. The cool air outside revived me in a measure,
but it was the mesmeric touch of two large, warm hands
which fully restored to me my faculties, and, looking up, I
saw bending over me the gentleman in whom I had been so
much interested. Dr. Clayton, too, was there, looking worried
and anxious, but instinctively leaving me to the care of
the stranger, who seemed to know exactly what to do.
“You are better now, I think,” said he, gazing down upon
me with his deep black eyes, and adding, with the same
peculiar smile I had before observed, “Miss ——’s acting
seldom receives so genuine a compliment as this. I imagine
she ought to feel flattered.”
At this moment a loud stamping and hallooing came to
my ear, and, pulling Anna’s shawl, Herbert exclaimed,
133“Come, let’s go in again; they are calling back the dancing-girl,
and I wouldn’t miss it for anything. Come, Rose, you
want to see it all, and we’ll stand right by the door.”
I felt perfectly well, and started to follow him, when
something in the stranger’s face arrested me, for it seemed
to say, “I wouldn’t go.” But he did not speak, and bowing
to me very politely, he walked away, while I went after
Herbert and Anna, reaching them just in time to witness a
part of Mlle. Lisette’s dance, which seemed to me a good
deal like the performance of the Circus girl, only “a little
more so;” and I felt certain that Cousin Will, had he been
there, would have pronounced her superior even to the
boasted Albany girl!
When at last it was over, and we were again leaving the
room, Dr. Clayton, as if seeing me for the first time, offered
me his hand, and in a low tone expressed to me his pleasure
that I was to be in the city during the winter; adding, as
he cast a furtive glance towards his wife, “You’ll come and
see me often, won’t you; for I am very lonely?”
For an instant I felt a thrill of pride, to know that there
was yet aught in me which could interest him, but ’twas only
for a moment, and then there came up before me thoughts
of the stranger, and owing to some unknown influence,
which I shall not attempt to explain, the doctor’s power
over me was from that moment at an end; and though I
still liked him, it was as I would like any friend who evinced
a regard for me.
Of the stranger I often thought, wondering who he was
and whence he came; but no one knew, and all that I could
learn was, that Herbert saw him the next morning standing
on the steps of the Revere House, and chancing the same
afternoon to be at the Worcester dépôt, he saw him enter
the cars bound for Albany, and heard from one of the
134bystanders that he was a Georgian, and had probably come
to Boston after “a runaway nigger!” Being a true born
daughter of freedom-loving Massachusetts, this intelligence
of course had the effect of cooling my ardor somewhat, and
wishing in my heart that every one of his negroes would run
away, I banished him for a time from my mind.
After many inquiries, and much consultation with her particular
friend Mrs. Ashley, my aunt at last decided to send
me to Madam ——’s school; while Anna, after a two weeks’
siege with dress-makers, was introduced into society, where,
if she was not a reigning belle, she was at least a favorite;
and more than once I heard the most flattering compliments
bestowed upon her, while it was thought to be “a pity that
her sister was so plain and unpretending in her appearance!”
CHAPTER XII. ADA MONTROSE.
135
Aunt Charlotte, Anna, and myself were sitting in the
parlor one morning, about four weeks after our arrival in
Boston, when the door-bell rang, and the servant ushered in
a young lady, who I readily guessed was Ada Montrose, for
there was about her an air of languor, as if she had just
arisen from a sick bed. All doubt on this point was soon
settled by my aunt’s exclaiming, as she hastened to greet her,
“Why, Ada, my child, this is a surprise. How do you do?”
The voice which answered was, I thought, the sweetest
and most musical I had ever heard, and yet there was in it
something which made me involuntarily shudder. I do not
know that I believe in presentiments, but sure I am that the
moment I heard the tones of Ada Montrose’s voice, and
looked upon her face, I experienced a most disagreeable
sensation, as if, in some way or other, she would one day
cross my path. She was beautiful—so beautiful, that it
seemed impossible to detect a single fault either in her features
or complexion, though there was in the former an
expression which made me feel, when her eyes were fixed
upon me, much as the bird must when charmed by the rattlesnake.
Do what I would, I could not rid myself of the
idea that she was my evil genius, though how in any way she,
a proud southern belle, could ever affect me, a plain school-girl
136of fourteen, was difficult to tell. She was, as I afterwards
learned, twenty-two years of age, but being rather
diminutive in size, and affecting a great deal of childish simplicity,
she passed for four or five years younger; and,
indeed, she herself gave her age as eighteen—looking up to
Anna, who was really two years her junior, as a very ancient,
matronly sort of person, who was supposed to remember as
far back as the flood.
Divesting herself of her warm wrappings, which she left
upon the floor, and shaking out her long curls, she informed
my aunt that she had come to spend the day, saying, by way
of apologizing for not having sent her word, that “she had
ventured to come without an invitation, she felt herself so
perfectly at home.”
Of course Aunt Charlotte was delighted, and after assuring
her of the fact, she suddenly remembered our presence,
and introduced us to the lady as “Mr. Lee’s nieces from the
country.” Not an instant did the large brownish black eyes
rest on me, for I was of little importance compared with
Anna, who the Thursday night previous had made her first
appearance in society, where her sweet face and fresh, unstudied
manners had produced something of a sensation,
which had undoubtedly reached the ear of the reigning
belle. What her thoughts were as she scanned my sister
from head to foot, I do not know; but as I watched her, I
fancied I could detect an expression of mingled scorn and
surprise that one so unassuming should awaken an interest
in those who were accustomed to pay her homage. When
she had satisfied herself with Anna’s personal appearance,
she gave me a hasty glance, and then drawing from her reticule
a fanciful mat which she was crotcheting, she leaned
back among the soft cushions of her chair, and commenced
talking to my aunt in a very artless, childish manner, never
137noticing us in the least, except once when she asked me to
pull the bell rope, which was much nearer to her than me.
Several times I fancied she seemed to be listening for something,
and when at last I heard Herbert’s voice in the hall and saw
the deepening flush on her cheek, I was sure that she felt
more than a common interest in him.
In his usual good-natured, off-hand way he entered the
room, tossing into my lap a letter from brother Charlie, and
telling Anna that her beau hadn’t yet written; then, as his
eye fell upon Ada, he started back in evident surprise. Soon
recovering himself, however, he said, as he took the little
snowflake of a hand, which she offered him—
“Why, Ad, who knew you were here?”
“Not you, or you would have come sooner, I reckon;”
said she, looking up in his face in a confiding kind of way,
which brought a frown to Anna’s brow.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have come so soon,” he replied laughingly,
at the same time stealing a sidelong glance at Anna.
“Here, sit right down by me,” said Miss Montrose, as she
saw him looking for a seat. “I want to scold you for not
calling on me oftener when I was sick. You don’t know how
neglected I felt. Why didn’t you come, hey?”
And she playfully pulled his hair, allowing her hand to remain
some time among his wavy locks. This was a kind of
coquetry entirely new to me, and I looked on in amazement,
while Anna, more disturbed than she was willing to acknowledge,
left the room. When she was gone, Ada said, letting
her hand fall from Herbert’s head to his arm, “Tell me, is
that the Lee girl, who attracted so much attention at Mrs.
G——’s party?”
There was a look of gratified pride on Herbert’s face as he
answered, “Yes—the same—don’t you think her pretty?”
They had probably forgotten my presence—Ada most certainly
138had, or else she did not care; for she replied, “Pretty
enough for some tastes I suppose, but she lacks polish
and refinement. Is she at all related to you?”
“My step-father’s niece, that’s all,” replied Herbert, while
Ada quickly rejoined in a low tone, “Then, of course, I
shan’t have to cousin her.”
“Probably not,” was Herbert’s answer, which I interpreted
one way and Ada another.
Her next remark was a proposal that Herbert should that
afternoon take her out to ride; but to this he made some objection;
whereupon she pretended to be angry, leaning back on
the sofa and muttering that “she didn’t believe he cared a bit
for her, and he might as well confess it at once.”
Here the dinner bell rang, and offering his arm to the
pouting beauty, Herbert led her to the dining-room, where
she was soon restored to good humor by my aunt, who lavished
upon her the utmost attention, humoring every whim,
and going so far as to prepare for her four different cups of
black tea, which had been ordered expressly for her, and to
which she objected as being too hot, or too cold—too weak
or too strong. It took but a short time to show that she
was a spoiled baby, good natured only when all the attention
was lavished upon her, and when her wishes were paramount
to all others.
Dinner being over, Herbert did not, as was his usual custom,
return to the parlor; but taking his hat he went out
into the street, in spite of his mother’s whispered effort to
keep him at home. This, of course, vexed the little lady, and
after thrumming a few notes upon the piano, she announced
her intention of returning home, saying that “she wished
she had not come.” At this moment the door-bell rang, and
some young ladies came in to call upon Anna. They seemed
surprised at finding Ada there, and after inquiring for her
139health, one of them said, “Do tell us Ada, who that gentleman
was that came and went so slily, without our ever
seeing him? Mrs. Cameron says he was from Georgia, and
that is all we know about him. Who was he?”
Ada started, and turning slightly pale, replied, “What do
you mean? I’ve seen no gentleman from Georgia. Where
was he? and when was he here?”
“As much as three weeks or more ago,” returned Miss
Marvin. “He stopped at the Revere House, and Mrs. Cameron,
who boards there, got somewhat acquainted with
him.”
“Mrs. Cameron!” repeated Ada, turning alternately red
and white. “And pray what did she say?”
I fancied there was a spice of malice in Miss Marvin’s nature;
at least, she evidently wished to annoy Ada, for she
replied, “She said he was ugly looking, though quite distingué;
that he came in the afternoon, while she was in the
public parlor talking with a lady about you and your engagement
with Mr. Langley!”
“The hateful old thing!” muttered Ada, while Anna
turned white as marble, and Miss Marvin continued—“When
the lady had gone he begged pardon for the liberty, but
asked her if she knew you. Of course, she told him she did,
and gave him any further information which she thought
would please him.”
“Of course she did—the meddling widow!” again interrupted
Ada; after which Miss Marvin proceeded—“Mrs.
Cameron didn’t mean to do anything wrong, for how could she
guess that ’twould affect him in any way to know you were
engaged?”
“And she told him I was engaged! It isn’t so. I ain’t,”
exclaimed Ada, while the angry tears dropped from her
glittering eyes.
140“What does that mean then?” asked Miss Marvin, laughingly,
pointing at the ring on Ada’s finger.
Her first impulse was to wrench it from her hand and cast
it from her, but she remembered herself in time, and growing
quite calm, as if to attribute her recent agitation to a different
cause, she said; “I wish people would attend to their
own affairs, and let mine alone. Suppose I am engaged—is
that a reason why Mrs. Cameron should discuss the
matter with strangers? But what else did she say? And
where is the gentleman now?”
“Gone home,” answered Miss Marvin, glancing mischievously
at her companions. “He went the next morning,
and she said he looked very much disturbed, either at your
illness or your engagement, the former probably, and that
is why I think it strange that he didn’t stop to see you;
though maybe he did.”
“No, he didn’t,” chimed in Miss Marvin’s sister, “for
don’t you know she said he went to the theatre?”
All this time my interest in the unknown Georgian had
been increasing, and at this last remark I forgot myself
entirely, and started forward, exclaiming, “Yes, he was
there, I saw him and spoke with him too.”
The next moment I sank back upon the ottoman, abashed
and mortified, while Ada gave me a withering glance, and
said scornfully, “You spoke to him! And pray, what did
you say?”
An explanation of what I said, would, I knew, oblige me
to confess the fainting fit, of which I was somewhat
ashamed, and so I made no reply; nor was any expected,
I think, for without waiting for my answer, Ada said to
Miss Marvin, “Mrs. Cameron, of course, learned his name,
even if she had to ask it outright.”
“Yes, she made inquiries of the clerk, who wouldn’t take
141the trouble of looking on the book, but said he believed it
was Field, or something like that,” returned Miss Marvin.
As if uncertainty were now made sure, Ada turned so
white that in some alarm her young friends asked what they
should do for her; but she refused their offers of aid, saying,
“it was only the heat of the room, and she should soon feel
better.”
“And is it the heat of the room which affects you, Miss
Lee?” asked one of the girls, observing for the first time the
extreme pallor of Anna’s face.
“Only a headache,” was her answer, as she pressed her
hand upon her forehead.
She was fearfully pale, and I knew it was no common
thing which had thus moved her, and when not long afterwards
the young ladies left us, I was glad, for I felt that
both she and Ada needed to be alone. The moment they
were gone Anna left the parlor, while I, frightened by the
agonized expression of her face, soon followed her; but the
door of our room was locked, and it was in vain I called on
her to admit me, for she only answered in a voice choked
with tears, “Go away, Rosa; I would rather be alone.”
So I left her and returned to the parlor, where I found
Ada weeping passionately, while my aunt, who had not
been present during the conversation which had so affected
her, was trying in vain to learn the cause of her grief.
“Nothing much,” was all Ada would say, except that
“she wanted to go home.”
In the midst of our excitement, Herbert came in. He
had repented of his ungracious refusal to ride with Ada,
and now the carriage stood at the door, but she refused,
saying petulantly, when urged by my aunt to go, that “if
she couldn’t ride when she wanted to, she wouldn’t ride at
all.”
142“Where’s Anna? she’ll go, I know,” said Herbert, glancing
around the room, and adding in a low tone, which
reached my ear only, “and I’d far rather she would.”
When I explained to him that she had a headache, and
did not wish to be disturbed, he exclaimed, “What ails all
the girls to-day. Anything the matter with you, Rose?
If there isn’t, put on your bonnet and I’ll show you the
city, for I am resolved upon riding with somebody.”
As my aunt made no objection, I was soon ready and
seated by the side of Herbert, in the light vehicle, which he
drove himself. I think he exerted himself to be agreeable,
for I never saw him appear so well before, and in my heart
I did not blame my poor sister for liking him, as I was sure
she did, while at the same time I wondered how he could
fancy Ada Montrose. As if divining my thoughts, he turned
suddenly towards me and said, “Rosa, how do you like
Ada?”
Without stopping to reflect, I replied promptly, “Not at
all.”
“Frankly spoken,” said he, and then for several minutes
he was silent, while I was trying to decide in my own mind
whether or not he was offended, and I was about to ask
him, when he turned to me again, saying, “We are
engaged—did you know it?”
I replied that I had inferred as much from the conversation
which I had heard between her and Miss Marvin,
saying further, for his manner emboldened me, that “I was
surprised, for I did not think her such an one as he would
fancy.”
“Neither is she,” said he, again relapsing into silence.
At last, rousing up, he continued, “I must talk to somebody,
and as you seem to be a sensible girl, I may as well
make a clean breast, and tell you all about it. Ada came
143up here from Georgia last spring, and the moment mother
saw her, she picked her out for her future daughter-in-law.
I don’t know why it is, but mother has wanted me to get
married ever since I began to shave. I believe she thinks
it will make me steady; but I am steady enough now, for
I haven’t drank a drop in almost a year. I should though,
if Ada Montrose was my wife. But that’s nothing to the
point. Mother saw her and liked her. I saw her, and
liked her well enough at first, for she is beautiful, you know,
and every man is more or less attracted by that. They say,
too, that she is wealthy, and though I would as soon marry
a poor girl as a rich one, provided I liked her, I shall not
deny but her money had its influence with me, to a certain
extent. And then, too, it was fun to get her away from the
other young men who flocked around her, like bees round
a honey jar. But, to make a long story short, we got
engaged—Heaven only knows how; but engaged we were,
and then”—— Here he paused, as if nearing a painful
subject, but soon resuming the thread of his story, he continued;
“And then I stopped writing to Anna, for I would
not be dishonorable. Do you think she felt it?”
The question was so unexpected, that I was thrown quite
off my guard, and replied, “Of course, she did; who
wouldn’t feel mortified to have their letters unanswered?”
“’Twas wrong, I know,” said he. “I ought to have been
man enough to tell her how it was, and I did begin more
than a dozen letters, but never finished them. Do you
think Anna likes me now, or could like me, if I was not
engaged, and she knew I’d never get drunk again?”
Could he have seen her when first she learned that his
affections were given to another, he would have been sufficiently
answered, but he did not, and it was not for me,
I thought, to enlighten him; so I replied evasively, after
144which he continued, “As soon as I was engaged to Ada,
she began to exact so much attention from me, acting so
silly, and appearing so ridiculous that I got sick of it, and
now my daily study is how to rid myself of her; but I believe
I’ve commenced right. Can I make a confidant of you,
and feel sure you’ll not betray me to any one, unless it is
Anna?”
I hardly knew how to answer, for if it was anything
wrong which he meditated, I did not wish to be in the
secret, and so I told him; but it made no difference, for he
proceeded to say, “I shall never marry Ada Montrose,
never; neither would it break her heart if I shouldn’t for
she’s more than half tired of me now.”
I thought of the dark stranger, and felt that he was
right, but I said nothing, and he went on; “Sometimes I
thought I’d go up to Meadow Brook, tell Anna all about
it, ask her to marry me, and so settle the matter at once;
but then I did not know but she might have grown up raw,
awkward, and disagreeable, so I devised a plan by which
I could find out. Mother would burn her right hand off
I believe, to save me from a drunkard’s grave, and when I
wish to win her consent to any particular thing, all I have
to do is to threaten her with the wine-cup.”
“Oh, Herbert! how can you?” I exclaimed, for I was
inexpressibly shocked.
“It’s a way I’ve got into,” said he, laughing at my rueful
face. “And when I suggested that Anna should spend the
winter here, I hinted to the old lady that if she didn’t
consent, I’d go off with a party of young men on a hunting
excursion. Of course she yielded at once, for she well knew
that if I joined my former boon companions, I should fall.
“And so we are indebted to you for our winter in Boston,”
said I, beginning to see things in a new light.
145“Why no, not wholly,” he answered; “mother consented
much easier than I supposed she would. The fact is, she’s
changed some since she was at Meadow Brook. She’s joined
the Episcopal Church, and though that in my estimation
don’t amount to much, of course, she has to do better, for it
wouldn’t answer for a professor to put on so many airs.”
As the daughter of a deacon, I felt it incumbent upon
me to reprove the thoughtless young man, but it did no
good, for he proceeded to say, “It’s all true, and there’s
only one denomination who are sincere in what they profess,
and that’s the Methodist. They carry their religion into
their whole life, while the Episcopalians, Presbyterians, and
Baptists sit on different sides of the fence, and quarrel like
fun about High Church and Low, Old School and New,
close communion and open communion, and all that sort of
thing. I tell you, Rose, if I am ever converted—and mother
thinks I will be—I shall be a roaring Methodist, and ride
the Circuit at once!”
I was unused to the world, and had never heard any one
speak thus lightly of religion; but I knew not what to say,
so I kept silence, while he continued, “But I am rambling
from my subject. Mother is a different woman, if she does
read her prayers; and as she has never known a word about
my writing to Anna, she consented to her coming, without
much trouble, saying she would try to make it pleasant for
her, and proposing that you too should accompany her,
and go to school. You can’t imagine how delighted I was
to find Anna what she is, and from the moment I met her in
the parlor, Ada Montrose’s destiny, so far as I am concerned,
was decreed; that is, if I can secure your sister; and I think
I shall have no difficulty in so doing, for notwithstanding her
affected coolness, it is easy to see that I am not indifferent
to her.”
146It was in vain for me to argue that he was doing Ada a
great wrong, for he insisted upon saying that he was not.
“She hadn’t soul enough,” he said, “to really care for any
one, and even if she had, he would far rather commit suicide
at once, than be yoked to her for life; she was so silly, so
fawning, so flat!”
It was nearly dark when we reached home, and as the
lamps were not yet lighted in the parlor, I went immediately
to my room, where I found Anna lying upon the sofa, with
her face buried in the cushions. I knew she was not asleep,
though she would not answer me, until I had thrice repeated
her name. Then lifting up her head, she turned towards
me a face as white as ashes, while she said, motioning to a
little stool near her, “Sit down by me, Rosa, I must talk to
some one, or my heart will break.”
Taking the seat, I listened while she told me how much
she had loved Herbert Langley—how she had struggled to
overcome that love when she thought he had slighted
her, and how when she saw him daily in his own home,
it had returned upon her with all its former strength,
until there came to her the startling news that he was engaged
to another. “I cannot stay here,” said she. “I am
going home. I have written to mother—see,” and she
pointed to a letter which lay upon the table, and which she
bade me read. It was a strange, rambling thing, saying
that “she should die if she staid longer in Boston, and that
she was coming back to Meadow Brook.”
“You can’t send this, Anna,” said I, at the same time
tossing it into the grate, where a bright coal fire was burning.
At this bold act of mine she expressed no emotion whatever,
but simply remarked, “I can write another or go without
writing.”
147“And you indeed love Herbert so much?” I said.
“Better than my life—and why shouldn’t I?” she replied.
“He is all that is noble and good.”
“Suppose he proves to be a drunkard?” I queried, looking
her steadily in the face, while she answered simply,
“And what then? Would that be harder to endure than
a life without him?”
I know not whether the spirit of prophecy was upon me,
or whether I felt a dim foreshadowing of my sister’s wretched
future, but from some cause or other, I proceeded to picture
to her the sorrows of a drunkard’s home and the utter
degradation of a drunkard’s wife, while she listened shudderingly,
saying when I had finished, “God save me from
such a fate!”
There was the sound of footsteps in the hall, and Herbert’s
voice was heard at the door, asking for admittance.
He had often visited us in our room, and now, without consulting
Anna’s wishes, I bade him enter, going out myself
and leaving them alone. What passed between them I
never knew, but the supper table waited long for Herbert,
and was finally removed, my aunt thinking he had gone out,
“to see Ada, perhaps,” she said, and then she asked me how
I liked her, telling me she was to be Herbert’s wife, and that
she hoped they would be married early in the spring.
I made her no direct reply, for I felt I was acting a double—nay,
a treble part, in being thus confided in by three,
but I could not well help it, and I hoped, by betraying
neither party, to atone in a measure for any deceit I might
be practising. After that night there was a great change in
Anna, who became so lively and cheerful that nearly all observed
it, while Herbert’s attentions to her, both at home
and abroad, were so marked as to arouse the jealously of
Ada, who, while she affected to scorn the idea of being supplanted
148by “that awkward Lee girl,” as she called her,
could not wholly conceal her anxiety lest “the Lee girl”
should, after all, win from her her betrothed husband.
Something of this she told my aunt, who, knowing nothing
of the true state of affairs, and having the utmost confidence
in her son’s honor, laughed at her fears, telling her
once in my hearing, though she was unaware of my proximity,
that, “however much Herbert might flirt with Anna, he
had been too well brought up to think of marrying one so
far beneath him.”
“But he does think of it—I most know he does,” persisted
Ada, beginning to cry; “and I wish you’d send her home,
won’t you?”
I did not hear my aunt’s reply, but with Ada, my own
heart echoed, “send her home,” for much as I liked Herbert,
I shrank from the thought of committing my gentle sister’s
happiness to his keeping, and secretly I resolved upon writing
to my father and acquainting him with the whole; but,
alas! I deferred it from day to day, until it was too late.
CHAPTER XIII. THE FLIGHT.
149
One bright morning about the middle of January, Herbert
announced his intention of going to Worcester with
Anna, who, he said, wished to visit the Lunatic Asylum, and
as a young physician of his acquaintance had just commenced
practising there, it would be a good opportunity for them
to go over the building. To this my aunt made no objection,
merely proposing that Ada, too, should go. Afterwards
I remembered the peculiar look in Herbert’s eye, as he replied
“Oh fie! mother, Ada’s nerves are not strong enough
to endure it. She can go with me some other time.”
Accordingly, when breakfast was over, Anna went up to
her room to make the necessary preparations for her ride,
while I stood by and gave her whatever assistance she needed.
I observed that every article which belonged to her was put
in its proper place, but I gave it no further heed, though I
did wonder why she kissed me so often, turning back even
after she had reached the door to bid me another good-bye.
Slowly the day passed away and night came on, dark, cold,
and stormy. Even now, as I write, I can recall to mind the
gloom which pervaded my spirits, as I listened to the sound
of the sleet and hail, which drove past the window, where I
had watched so long for their return. Seven, eight, nine,
ten, was rung from more than one church dome, and then
150we gave them up, for the shrill whistle of the last train on
which they would be likely to come, had long since sounded
in our ears.
“They must have stayed somewhere; don’t you think
so?” said my aunt, addressing her husband, who, manlike,
was not in the least alarmed, but sat conning his evening
paper, nearer asleep than awake.
“Of course they have,” said he, looking up at his wife’s
inquiry. “I wouldn’t come in this storm, if I were in their
places.”
That night I watered my pillow with tears, scarcely
knowing why I wept, save that I felt oppressed with a sense
of desolation, as if Anna was gone from me forever. The
next day came and went, but it brought no tidings of the
missing pair, and half unconscious of what she was doing,
my aunt went from room to room, sometimes weeping and
again brightening up, as she enumerated the many things
which might have prevented their return. At evening, Ada
came in, and my aunt immediately began urging her to
spend the night. This she did willingly, seeming very anxious
concerning the absence of Herbert, and feeling, I was
sure, a little suspicious that I might know more of his
whereabouts than I chose to tell, for once, when we were
alone, she turned towards me and very haughtily asked, if
“I had any idea where they were?”
“None, whatever,” said I, and she continued—
“Has it never occurred to you that this Anna Lee manifested
altogether too marked a preference for a gentleman
whom she knew to be engaged?”
“The preference was mutual,” I replied. “Herbert liked
Anna, and Anna liked Herbert.”
“And they have gone off to consummate that liking by a
marriage,” interrupted Ada.
151“I do not know that they have,” I returned; “but such
a termination of affairs would not surprise me.”
She was very pale, and there were tears in her eyes, but
I thought they arose more from a sense of mortification than
from any real love which she bore for Herbert Langley, and
so I did not pity her as I should otherwise have done. The
next morning at breakfast both she and my aunt (particularly
the latter) looked weary and worn, as if neither
had slept at all during the night. My uncle, on the contrary,
seemed to be unmoved. He probably had an opinion
of his own, but whatever it was he kept it to himself, merely
saying that if the eastern mail brought no letter he would
go in quest of them himself. I knew I could not study in
my present excitement, and so I asked permission to remain
at home. Stationing myself at the window, I watched anxiously
for the return of Herod, who, as usual, had been sent
to the office. He came at last, bringing his pocket full of
letters, two of which were for me, one postmarked Meadow
Brook, and the other Albany! With a trembling hand I
tore open the latter, which was in my sister’s handwriting.
Glancing at the signature, my fears were confirmed, for there
stood the name of “Anna Langley” in Herbert’s bold dashing
hand!
“She had refused to write it thus,” he said, in a postscript,
“and so he had done it for her.”
The letter contained no apology from either for what they
had done, but merely informed me of the fact that instead
of stopping in Worcester, they had gone straight on to Albany,
which they reached about six o’clock, going to the
Delevan House, where in less than an hour they were
husband and wife; Herbert’s old comrade, Tom Wilson,
accompanying them, and being a witness of the
ceremony. What affected me more unpleasantly than all
152the rest, was the derisive manner in which Herbert spoke of
Ada.
“Give her my love,” he said, “and tell her not to feel too
badly. I’d like well enough to marry her, too, but under
the present laws a man can’t have two wives, unless he joins
the Mormons. Maybe I shall do that sometime, and then
I’ll remember her!”
Of his mother he wrote differently, and though there was
no cringing, no acknowledgment of wrong, he spoke of her
kindly and respectfully, saying, “he hoped she would love
his Anna for his sake.”
Of course I could not tell Ada what he said of her, neither
was it necessary, for guessing the truth from my face,
she came up softly behind me, and looking over my shoulder,
read every word until she came to the message intended for
her. Then stamping her little foot, she exclaimed passionately,
“The villain, to insult me thus! As if I, sprung from
the best blood in Georgia, would stoop to become a rival of
that low-born country girl. No! By this act Herbert
Langley has shown that he is all unworthy of me, and I
rejoice in my escape, while I give him much joy with his
highly refined and polished bride.”
All my Lee temper, which is considerable, was roused, and
turning towards the lady, I exclaimed, “My sister, Miss
Montrose, is as good as you, aye, or as Herbert Langley
either, and the news of her marriage with him will carry
sorrow to our home at Meadow Brook, where they will say
she has literally thrown herself away.”
“Very likely,” returned Ada, sarcastically. “It is quite
probable that a poor laborer will object to his daughter’s
marrying into one of the first families in Boston.”
“He isn’t a poor laborer,” I replied, “and even if he
were, he would object to his daughter’s marrying a drunkard,
153for such Herbert Langley has been and such he will be
again.”
A deep groan came from the white lips of my aunt, and
for the first time since Ada’s outbreak, I remembered that
she was there. She did not reprove me angrily, but in
trembling tones she said, “Rose, Herbert is my child, my
boy, and it becomes not a girl of your age to speak thus of
him in the presence of his mother.”
I was humbled, and winding my arms about her neck, I
asked forgiveness for the harsh words I had spoken; and
she forgave me, for she meant to do right, and if sometimes
she erred, it was owing more to a weakness of the flesh than
an unwillingness of the spirit. In the midst of our excitement
Tom Wilson was ushered in. He had returned in the
same train which brought the letter, and had come to give
us any further information which we might be desirous of
knowing.
“When will Herbert come home?” was my aunt’s first
question, her whole manner indicating how much interest she
felt in the answer.
“Not very soon,” returned Tom. “He is tired of the
city, he says, and besides that he wishes to avoid the unpleasant
remarks his elopement will necessarily occasion.”
“More like he wishes to avoid introducing his bride into
society, which he knows has no wish to receive her,” muttered
Ada.
Tom paid no attention to this spiteful speech, but continued,
“He has drawn his money from the —— Bank, and
with it he intends purchasing a farm in the western part of
New York.”
“An admirable plan,” again interrupted Ada. “That
Lee girl is just calculated for a farmer’s wife.”
Taken alone there was nothing particularly disagreeable
154in the three words “that Lee girl;” but spoken by Ada
Montrose they sounded insultingly, and every time she uttered
them, I felt my blood boil, for I, too, was a Lee girl, and I
was sure she included me in the same contemptuous category.
As Herbert had said, I did not think the disappointment
would break her heart. She was too angry for that, and I
believe now, as I did then, that most of her feeling arose
from the mortification of knowing that a “poor country
girl,” as she called Anna, was preferred to herself. For half
an hour or more Tom Wilson and my aunt conversed together,
she asking him at least a dozen times “if he did
not think Herbert could be induced to return.” At last,
with quivering lips and flushed cheeks, as if it cost her pride
a great effort, she said, “Of course I mean Anna, too, when
I speak of Herbert’s return. She is his wife, you say, and
though I might, perhaps, wish it otherwise, it cannot now be
helped, and if he only would come back to me, I should love
her for his sake.”
In my heart I blessed her for these words, and mentally
resolved to leave no argument untried, which might bring
the fugitives back. But it could not be. Herbert was decided,
he said. He meant to be a farmer and live in the
country, adding what he knew would silence his mother
sooner than aught else he could say, “that temptations for
him to drink were far greater in the city than in the country,
and it was for this reason partly that he preferred living in
the latter place.”
And so my aunt yielded the point; but from the day of
her son’s desertion, there was in her a perceptible change.
Far oftener was she found in the house of prayer, and less
frequently was she seen in places of amusement, while more
than once I heard her in secret asking that her wayward boy
might be shielded from the great temptation. Alas! for
155thee, poor Herbert Langley, sleeping in thine early grave!
There were prayers enough, methinks, to save thee; for at the
old Meadow Brook home, thou wert remembered in the early
morn, and not forgotten when at eve, my father knelt him
down to pray. Why, then, didst thou fall ere thy sun had
reached the meridian of manhood? Was it because in thine
early training there was an error which no after exertions
could repair? We answer, Yes. The fault was there, and
little know they what they do, who set before their sons the
poisonous cup, and bid them, by their own example, drink
and die. How many young men, from the higher walks of
life, now sleeping in the dishonored grave of a drunkard,
might at this moment be filling some honorable position, had
it not been for the wine or beer drinking habit acquired in
childhood by their own firesides, and at their father’s table?
Look to it, then, you around whose hearthstones promising
sons are gathered, and if in the coming years you would escape
the sleepless nights, the bitter tears, and the broken
hearts of those whose children walk in the path, which,
sooner than all others, leadeth down to death, teach them,
both by precept and by practice, to “touch not, taste not,
handle not,” for therein alone lieth safety.
CHAPTER XIV. TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS.
156
Early in March, as I was one Saturday morning seated
with my aunt in her pleasant, cozy sewing-room, a little boy
brought me a note from Dell Clayton, in which she requested
me, if possible, to spend the afternoon with her. She was
sick, she wrote, unable to sit up, and what was worse than
all, she was homesick and unhappy! Her aunt, she said,
was out of the city, and as she had no acquaintance, she
thought the sight of a familiar face would do her good.
Aunt Charlotte, to whom I handed the note, consented to
my going, and immediately after dinner, which that day was
served at an earlier hour than usual, I started. Long and
daily walks have always been to me a luxury, and so, though
I had been but a few months in Boston, I was tolerably well
acquainted with most of its localities, and had no trouble in
finding the once stylish, but now rather dilapidated and gloomy
looking block, in one part of which Dr. Clayton was keeping
house. Since the night when I met him at the theatre, I
had never seen him, and all that I knew of him was that he
had left the Tremont. Subsequently, however, I heard the
whole history of their proceedings—partly from the doctor,
partly from Dell, and partly from other sources, and as a recital
of it may not be wholly uninteresting to my readers, I
will give it before proceeding with a description of my call.
157It seems that boarding at the Tremont was rather too expensive
for a physician, whose patients were not so numerous
as to be troublesome, and several times had the
doctor proposed returning to his old place in Sturbridge,
where everything was cheaper; but to this Dell objected,
for she well knew it would be an admission that they could
not succeed in Boston, and against this her pride revolted.
“People at home,” she reasoned, “would never know how
matters really were, and as long as she could keep up an appearance
of gentility and upper-ten-dom with her former
friends, she should do so,” preferring, like many others, almost
absolute want in the city, to plenty in the country.
From this, the reader is not to infer that the doctor was extremely
poor; for when he first went to Boston he was
worth about fifteen hundred dollars, which, in a country village,
with a prudent wife, would have surrounded him with
all the comforts of life, besides leaving him with something
for that “rainy day,” about which everybody blessed with a
careful grandmother has heard more or less.
In the city, of course, it needed a great deal of money to
keep up the kind of style upon which Dell insisted, and
which, after all, was far from satisfying her—it was so much
inferior to the elegance she saw around her; and as check
after check of the doctor’s little hoard was drawn from the
bank to meet their expenses, while but few would get sick,
or being so would send for him, his heart sank within him,
and without really meaning to do so, he began to wonder
“when that old grandmother would die!” Finding that he
could not much longer pay the enormous bills, which were presented
to him weekly at the Tremont, he decided at last upon
housekeeping, and exercising in this case his own judgment,
in spite of the tears, sulks, and remonstrances of his wife, he
hired a house in an obscure street, where the rents were much
158lower than in the more fashionable part of the city. Very
neatly he fitted it up, going rather beyond his means, it is
true, but depending a great deal upon the fast failing health
of Grandmother Barton, to set all things right.
Everything was at last arranged, and with that comfortable
feeling which other men have experienced in similar
circumstances, he took his seat for the first time at his own
table, forgetting in his happiness that the smiling, handsome
face of the lady opposite, in blue merino morning gown and
clean white linen collar, had ever worn any look save that
which now sat upon it. Breakfast was hardly over, when
the door bell rang violently and a man appeared telling the
doctor that his services were required immediately by the
wealthy Mrs. Archer, who lived in an adjoining street, and
who owned the entire block in which he lived.
Mrs. Archer belonged to that class of people who are always
dying, first with one fancied disease and then with another,
in the end, however, living much longer than those
whose business it is to minister to their wants. Being freakish
and whimsical, she seldom employed the same physician
longer than a year, but during that time a man with limited
wants was sure of a livelihood, for his services were required
every day, and the remuneration for the same was so prompt
and liberal as to make her patronage much sought after, particularly
by new practitioners. Having taken a violent fancy
to Dr. Clayton when he bargained with her for the house,
she had decided henceforth to employ him, if on trial he
proved to be all she wished.
The doctor was well aware of her peculiarities, and for
several days past had indulged a faint hope that she
might favor him with a call. This she had now done, and
very eagerly he prepared to visit her. As he reached his
gate, he was met by a boy who brought a telegraphic
159dispatch from Wilbraham, saying that Grandma Barton was
dead! Yes, the old lady was gone, and Dell was undoubtedly
the heiress of ten thousand dollars at least, and probably
more, for her grandmother bore the reputation of being miserly,
and rumor said that twice ten thousand was nearer the
actual sum of her possessions. To ascertain the truth as
soon as possible was the doctor’s great desire, and as the
next train bound for the east started in about two hours, he
decided to go at once, though the funeral was not to take
place for two or three days.
Suddenly Mrs. Archer’s message occurred to him, but
matters were now changed—he was a rich man, and as such
Mrs. Archer’s patronage was not of vital importance. Still
it would hardly do to slight her, and rather unwillingly he
bent his steps towards her dwelling. When there he appeared
so abrupt and absent-minded, telling her there was
nothing whatever the matter with her as he could see, that
the good lady was wholly disgusted, and the moment he was
gone, she dispatched the servant for another physician, who,
possessing more tact, and not having recently come into the
possession of a fortune, told her with a grave, concerned
look, that “he never saw anything like her case—it really
baffled his skill, though he thought he could cure her, and it
would give him pleasure to try.”
Of course he was employed, and just as Dr. Clayton and
Dell were stepping into the omnibus, which took them to the
dépôt, a note was handed to the former, saying his services
were no longer needed by Mrs. Archer. Without giving it
a thought, the doctor crushed the note into his pocket, and
then springing into the carriage, took his seat by Dell, to whom
he was unusually attentive, for she had risen in his estimation
full ten thousand dollars’ worth, and what man, for that
sum of money, would not occasionally endure a cross look, or
160a peevish word! Not the doctor most certainly; and when
on reaching the dépôt, they found that the cars would not
leave for half an hour or more, he could not resist her entreaties
to go with her to a jeweller’s, on —— street, where
the day before she had seen “such a beautiful set of cameos,
earrings, bracelet, and pin to match—then, too, they
were so cheap, only $50. She knew he would buy them!”
’Twas in vain for him to say that he had not fifty dollars
for she replied, that “he could take it from the bank and
replace it when she got her fortune;” adding, “I’ll give
you a hundred in place of it: so gratify me this once, that’s
a dear, good man.”
Of course, the dear good man was persuaded as many
an other dear good man has been, and will be again by a
coaxing woman. The cameos were bought, and in the best
of humor the young couple took their seats in the cars,
which were soon bearing them swiftly towards the house of
death. Very pleasant were the doctor’s reflections as the
train sped on over valley and plain: he was a fortunate,
happy man, and if when they paused at the Meadow Brook
station he thought for an instant of the girl Rosa Lee, her
memory was to him like an idle dream, which had passed
away in the golden beams of day. Arrived at Wilbraham
dépôt, they took a carriage for the village, which is about
two miles or more from the railroad.
The old brown shutters of the large wooden building,
where Mrs. Barton had lived and died, were closed, and
about the house there was no sign of life. But this was
hardly different from what it had been during the old lady’s
life, for she was one who lived mostly within herself, seldom
seeing company, though always sure to go whenever she was
invited. Exceedingly penurious, she stinted her household
to the last degree of endurance, and denied herself even the
161comforts of life, while her last request had been that her
body might be suffered to remain in her sleeping-room, so
as not to litter the parlor, or wear the carpet!
At the head of the family was Mabel Warrener, a poor
young girl, who for the three years had lived with Mrs.
Barton in the capacity of half waiting-maid, half companion,
and to her the neighbors now looked for directions. Anxious
to pay all due deference to the wishes of her late mistress,
Mabel at first said, “Let the body remain where it is;”
but when she reflected that “the fashionable Mrs. Clayton
from Boston,” with her proud husband (for so were they
considered), would probably be there, she changed her mind,
and the deceased was carried into the dark, damp parlor,
where a fire had not been kindled for more than a year.
The same was also true of the chamber above, which was
designed for the doctor and his lady, the latter of whom
shivered as she entered it, rather haughtily bidding Mabel,
who accompanied her, “to make a fire there as soon as possible,
for she was not accustomed to cold rooms, and should
freeze to death.”
Very meekly Mabel complied, not only with this requisition,
but with fifty others, from the same source; for Dell,
thinking she was now mistress of the house, took upon herself
many airs, ordering this, that and the other, until the
neighbors, quite disgusted, left poor Mabel alone, with the
exception of the deaf old woman, who ruled in the kitchen
as cook. The morning following the arrival of the doctor,
Capt. Thompson, wife, and son came out from Sturbridge to
attend the funeral; for though they were in no way connected
with Mrs. Barton, they knew her well, and wished to
pay her this last tribute of respect. Then, too, Mrs. Thompson
was very desirous of seeing Dell, who was now an
heiress, and as such entitled to attention. Long they
162talked together concerning the future, Dell telling how she
meant “to fix up the old rookery for a summer residence,”
and inviting her sister-in-law to spend as much time with
her as she possibly could. The cameos were next duly
inspected, admired, tried on, and then the two went down
to the room below, and turning back the thin muslin which
shaded the face of the dead, gazed upon the pinched, stony
features which seemed so much to reproach them for their
cold-hearted selfishness, in thus planning ways and means by
which to spend her hoarded wealth even before she was
buried from their sight.
That afternoon there was heard a tolling bell, and a long
procession moved slowly to the churchyard, where the words
“ashes to ashes—dust to dust,” and the sound of the hard
frozen earth, rattling upon the coffin-lid, broke the solemn
stillness, but disturbed not the rest of those, who, henceforth,
would be the fellow-sleepers of her now committed to
the grave. When the party of mourners had returned to
the house, the doctor began to speak of the necessity there
was for his returning immediately to the city, at the same
time hinting to Capt. Thompson that “if there was a will
he would like to see it.”
Mabel Warrener, who was supposed to know more than
any one else concerning Mrs. Barton’s affairs, was called in
and questioned, she replying that her mistress, one day,
about two weeks before her death, had said to her that if,
after her death, any inquiry should be made concerning her
will, it could be found in the private drawer of her secretary,
where was also a letter for Mrs. Clayton. Both of
these were brought out, and with her handkerchief over her
eyes, Dell listened while Capt. Thompson read aloud the
astounding fact that the entire possessions of Mrs. Barton,
amounting to $15,000, were given to Mabel Warrener,
163who, having had no suspicion whatever of the fortune in
store for her, fainted away, and was borne from the room,
as was also Dell; while the doctor, it was confidently
asserted, went out behind the woodshed and actually vomited,
so great was his disappointment! Soon rallying, however,
both he and his wife declared it a fraud, accusing the still
unconscious Mabel of treachery, and it was not until the lawyer
who had drawn the will was produced, that they could
be convinced. Suddenly remembering her letter, Dell broke
it open and found therein the reasons for this most unaccountable
freak. Always peculiar and naturally jealous,
Mrs. Barton had felt piqued that she was not invited to
Dell’s wedding, which, considering that she was spending the
summer in Albany at the time when it took place, was not
very remarkable. Then, too, she was not consulted, and she
didn’t believe in doctors, they killed more than they cured;
but the head and front of the offence seemed to be that
instead of hiring two or three rooms and keeping house in a
small, economical way, they boarded at the Tremont, where
Dell had nothing to do but “to change her dress, eat, sleep,
and laze”—so the letter ran—“and she (Mrs. Barton) would
not suffer a penny of her money to go for the support of
such extravagance: she preferred giving it to Mabel Warrener,
who was a prudent, saving girl, and would take care
of it; while the paltry doctor would spend it for cigars,
fast horses, patent leather boots, and all sorts of fooleries.”
The letter ended with an exhortation to Dell to “go to
work and earn her own living, as her grandmother had
done before her.”
The doctor’s reflections, as he rode back to Boston, were
not of the most enviable nature; and who can wonder if
he was rather testy towards his wife, who retorted so
164angrily as to bring on quite a sharp quarrel, which was
prevented from being heard by the roar of the machinery;
and if at Meadow Brook he did think again of Rosa Lee,
half fancying that 5,000 divided by 13, if shared with her,
might be preferable to nothing divided by nothing, shared
with Dell; who can blame him? Not I, most certainly.
Wasn’t he terribly disappointed? Hadn’t he just lost
$15,000, to say nothing of a patient, whose patronage would
have insured him a living for at least a year, besides introducing
him into a broader field of practice; and if the
cameo earrings were rather becoming to the dark hair and
black eyes of his wife, did that in any way compensate him
for the fifty dollars which stood on the Cr. side of his
bank-book? Still, I see no good reason why, after their
arrival home at a late hour of the night, they should sit up
for more than an hour in a cold, cheerless room, telling each
other—the one that she wished she had never married him,
for “he alone stood in the way of her inheritance;” while
the other replied, that “but for her extravagance he should
now have had $1,500 in the bank instead of five hundred.”
Wretched couple! Their history is like that of many
others, who marry without a particle of love, or at most,
only a passing fancy. Had Dell chosen, she could in time
have won the affection of her husband, but being naturally
selfish and exacting, she expected from him every attention;
while in return she seldom gave him aught save cross looks
and peevish words, complaining that he did not treat her
now as he once had done. As long as the doctor had a
fortune in expectancy, he bore his wife’s ill humor tolerably
well, but now that hope was gone, his whole being seemed
changed, and Dell was not often obliged to quarrel alone.
At last, broken in spirits, and being really sick, she had
sent for me, as I have before stated. I found her in bed,
165propped up on pillows, her shining hair combed back, and
her large black eyes seeming blacker than ever, from contrast
with her colorless cheek. All her old haughtiness was
gone, and the moment she saw me she stretched her arms
towards me, and bursting into tears, exclaimed, “Oh, Rose,
I am so glad you have come. I was afraid you wouldn’t,
for I knew your aunt was very aristocratic, and I thought
she might not be willing to have you visit poor, obscure
people like us.”
There was much of bitterness in the last part of this
speech, and it grated harshly upon my feelings; but it was
like her, I knew, and she had only judged my aunt by what
she well knew she should herself be in a similar position; so
I took no notice of it, save to assure her that Aunt Charlotte
was perfectly willing I should come, while at the same
time I expressed my sorrow at finding her so unwell, and
asked “what was the matter.”
“Oh, nothing much,” said she. “I have no particular
disease, unless it be one of the mind, and that you know is
not easily cured.”
I made no answer to this; but after a moment’s silence,
I ventured to inquire for her husband. Instantly there came
a bright glow to her cheek, as she replied, “Oh, he is as well
as could be expected, considering his terrible disappointment.”
Of course I asked what disappointment, whereupon she
proceeded to narrate a part of what I have already told to
my readers, withholding nearly all the points wherein she had
been to blame, and dwelling with apparent delight upon the
faults of her husband, who, she protested, was wholly selfish
and avaricious. “I know,” said she, “why he married me;
’twas for the sake of the few dollars he thought my grandmother
would leave me, and now being disappointed in that,
166he cares no more for me than he does for you—no, nor half
so much, for he always preferred you to me, and I wish I
had let you have him, for you liked him, I know, better than
I did.”
As she said this, she looked me steadily in the face, as if
to read my inmost soul. I felt provoked, for I now thought
of my former affection for the doctor as something of which
I was a little ashamed, and I did not much like to be reminded
of it by his wife. So I ventured to say that “whatever I
might once have felt for her husband, it was all over now,
and I could think of no greater misfortune than that of being
his wife!”
Now, I should know better than to speak thus to any woman
concerning her husband, for however much she may talk
against him herself, she certainly has no desire or expectation
that her listener will agree with her. On this occasion, Dell
grew angry at once, telling me “I needn’t speak so lightly
of her husband—he was good enough for anybody,” while at
the same time she muttered something about “sour grapes!”
I was taken quite aback, and remained silent, until she at
last said, laughingly, “I don’t wish to quarrel with you,
Rose. Pardon any ill humor I may have manifested. I get
nervous and fidgety staying here alone so much.”
“Is not the doctor with you sometimes?” I inquired.
“Oh, yes; once in a great while,” said she; “but he can
bear the atmosphere of any other sick-room better than
mine. So he’s off—hunting up patients, I suppose. I tell
him he gets his living that way, and a poor living it bids
fair to be. Between you and me, Rose,” she continued,
growing excited, “he is shiftless, if you know what that
means, and we are worth to-day just as much as we ever
shall be.”
I felt that she wronged him, and told her so, at the same
167time enumerating his many good qualities, while she listened,
evidently better pleased than when I had spoken lightly
of him. In the midst of our conversation there was a
familiar step in the hall, and a moment after the doctor himself
entered the room. He looked careworn and haggard;
but at the sight of me, whose presence surprised him, his face
quickly lighted up, and there was much of his olden manner
as he took my hand and expressed his pleasure at finding me
there. ’Twas but a for moment, however, for catching the eye
of his wife, he became almost instantly reserved, and seating
himself near a window, he pretended to be much occupied
with a book, which I accidentally discovered was wrong side
up! It was strange how much waiting-upon Dell suddenly
needed. Heretofore she had been very quiet, saying she did
not wish for anything, but now that he was there, her pillows
must be turned, her head must be bathed, the window
must be open and then shut, while with every other breath,
she declared him to be “the awkwardest man she ever saw,”
saying once, “she didn’t wonder he had no more practice if
he handled all his patients as roughly as he did her.”
After this unkind speech, the doctor made no farther attempt
to please her, but left her side and returned to his
seat by the window. Ere long the supper bell rang. I had
not supposed it was so late, and starting up announced my
intention of going home, but to this neither the doctor nor
Dell would listen, both of them insisting upon my staying to
tea; she, because she felt that common civility required
it, and he, because he really wished it. Once out of her
sight, he was himself again, and playfully drawing my arm
within his, he led me to the dining-room, placing me at the
head of the table, where Dell was accustomed to sit, while
he took the seat opposite. As we sat there thus, I shall not
say that there came to my mind no thought of what might
168have been, but I can say, and truthfully too, that such
thoughts brought with them naught of pain; for though
Dr. Clayton had once possessed the power of swaying me at
his will, that time had gone by, and he was to me now only
a friend, whom I both liked and pitied, for I knew he was
far from being happy. Once, when I handed him his second
cup of tea, he said, smiling upon me, “It makes me very
happy to see you there—in that seat.”
I made no answer; and, as if thinking he had said what
he ought not, he immediately changed the conversation, and
began to question me of my studies, etc., asking me among
other things, if I went to dancing school. Instantly I remembered
Mrs. Ross’s slippers with the little wads of cotton,
and I laughed aloud. It seems his thoughts took the same
direction, for he, too, laughed so loudly that when we returned
to Dell’s room, she rather pettishly inquired what we
found to amuse us so much, saying “she hadn’t seen the
doctor look so pleased since—since, well, since grandma’s
death,” she finally added, at the same time glancing at him
to witness the effect of her words.
He turned very white about the mouth, and I am quite
certain I heard the word “thunder!” At all events, his
eyes flashed angrily upon the provoking woman, who again
inquired at what we were laughing. When I told her, she
too laughed, saying, “Oh, yes, I remember it well, and have
sometimes thought that I owe my present position to that
awkward misstep of yours.”
“I am very glad I fell, then,” said I, rather impatiently,
while I threw on my hood and shawl, preparatory to going
home.
“Hadn’t you better call an omnibus for her?” asked Dell
of her husband, who was putting on his overshoes.
“I am going round with her myself,” he answered. “I
169have a patient on the way,” and he hurried from the room
ere she could say anything further.
It was a beautiful moonlight night, and as I took his arm
I recalled the time when once before we had walked thus together.
I think he remembered it too, for he asked me
“if I ever visited Pine District?”
“Not often,” I replied; and he continued to say, that “notwithstanding
that it was little more than a year and a half
since he first saw me there, it seemed to him an age,” adding;
“and it is not strange neither, for I have passed through many
trials since then.”
To this I made no reply, and ere long he proceeded to
speak further of himself, and of his disappointment, first with
regard to his business, and next with regard to his domestic
relations, which he gave me to understand were not particularly
happy. Very delicately and carefully he handled
the latter subject, speaking not one half so harshly of Dell
as she had spoken of him. Still I felt that he had no right
thus to speak to me, and so I told him.
“I know it, Rose,” he returned. “I know it all; but
for this once you must hear me, and I will never trouble you
again. I committed a great error in marrying one, while
my heart belonged to another—stay,” he continued, as I was
about to interrupt him. “You must hear me out. It is not
of my love for that other that I would speak; but, Rose, I
would know how far I have wronged you. Did you love
me, and had I asked you to share my home, when at a suitable
age, would you have done so?”
He was very pale, and the arm on which my hand was
resting, trembled violently, but grew still when he heard my
answer, which was, “I did love you, but ’twas a childish
love and quickly passed away. And were you now free as
you once were, I could be to you nothing save a friend.”
170There was a mixture of disappointment and pleasure on
his face; but he replied, “I am glad that it is so, and shall
now feel happier, for the hardest part of all was the thought
that possibly you, too, might suffer.”
“Not at all,” I answered, adding, “it would be foolish
to break my heart for one man, when there are so many in
the world.”
This I said with bitterness, for I remembered the time
when I had wept in the shadowy woods of Meadow Brook,
and if for a moment I experienced a feeling of satisfaction in
knowing that what I suffered then, he was suffering now, I
can only plead woman’s nature as an apology. ’Twas but
for a moment, however, and then, casting off all such feelings,
I spoke to him kindly of his wife, telling him he could
be happy with her if he tried, and that if he were not, it was
probably as much his fault as hers. Brighter days, too,
would come, I said, when his practice would not be limited
to three patients, one of whom was too poor to pay, and another
was already convalescent, while the third was in the
last stages of her disease, and would need his services but a
few days longer.
“You are my good angel, Rose,” said he, when at last we
reached my uncle’s door, “and your words inspire me with
courage. Come and see us often, for the sight of you does
me good, and God knows how much I stand in need of sympathy.
Farewell.”
He pressed my hand, and hastily raising it to his lips,
turned away, dreading, as I well knew, a return to the sick-room,
where naught would greet him save reproachful complaints,
and where the dark eyes, which had first won his
admiration, would flash angrily upon him. In the hall, I
stood for a time, pondering in my mind some way by which
I could assist him, and I even thought of feigning sickness
171myself for the sake of adding another patient to his list!
But this, I knew, he would easily detect, and possibly he
might misconstrue my motive for so doing, and this project
was abandoned, and I entered the parlor in quest of my
aunt, who, I learned from one of the servants, was in her
own room, suffering from a severe headache. She had taken
a violent cold, which, by the next morning, had developed
itself into a species of influenza, at that time prevailing in
the city. Added to this was a general debility and prostration
of the nerves, brought on by her recent trouble and
anxiety concerning Herbert.
My uncle, who was always alarmed when she was ill,
wished for medical advice; but to this she objected, as Dr.
Mott, the family physician, was absent, and she knew of no
other, whom she dare trust. Instantly I thought of Dr.
Clayton. If she could be prevailed upon to employ him, I
knew she would like him, for I could testify to his extreme
kindness in a sick-room, and good nursing was what she most
needed. When I suggested that he should be called, she at
first refused; but before night, being much worse, she consented,
and never had I experienced a moment of greater
happiness than when I hastened to the kitchen with a message
for John, who was to go immediately for Dr. Clayton.
Then taking my uncle aside, I explained to him the straitened
circumstances of the young physician, hinting to him,
that prompt remuneration for his services would undoubtedly
be acceptable.
“Yes, yes, I understand,” said he; “you want me to
pay him to-day.”
Here we were interrupted by the ringing of the door-bell.
Dr. Clayton had come, and the result was as I had hoped.
My aunt was greatly pleased—he was so kind and gentle,
humoring all her fancies, and evincing withal so much judgment
172and skill, that she felt confidence in his abilities; and
when he was gone, expressed herself as preferring him even
to Dr. Mott, “who,” she said, “was getting old and cross.”
As he was leaving the house, my uncle placed in his hand
a five dollar bill, whereupon the doctor turned very red, and
asked if he were not expected to call again.
“Certainly, certainly,” said my uncle, who, manlike,
hadn’t the least bit of tact; “keep coming until Charlotte
is well. I only paid you for this call to please Rosa.”
Instead of the displeased, mortified look, which I expected
to see on the doctor’s face, there was an expression of deep
gratitude, as he turned his eyes towards me; and I thought
there was a moisture in them, which surprised me, for I did
not then know how much that five dollars was needed: it
being the exact amount requisite for the payment of the
girl, who refused to remain with them another day unless
her wages were forthcoming. To such straits are people,
apparently in easy circumstances, sometimes reduced.
For more than a week my aunt was confined to her room,
while the doctor came regularly, always staying a long time,
and by his delicate attentions winning golden laurels from
his patient, who was far better pleased with him than with
the fussy old man, who, being always in a hurry, only stopped
for a moment, while he looked at her tongue, felt her
pulse, and recommended blistering and bleeding, with a dose of
calomel, neither of which Dr. Clayton believed to be a saving
ordinance, and indispensable to the comfort and recovery of
his patients. By this, I do not mean anything derogatory
to the good old custom of tormenting folks to death before
their time, but having a faint remembrance of certain blisters,
which, together with cabbage leaves and the tallowed
rags, once kept me in a state of torture for nearly a week,
to say nothing of the sore mouth, the loose teeth, and the
173tightly-bandaged arm, I cannot help experiencing a kind of
nervous tremor at the very mention of said prescriptions.
Dr. Clayton’s attendance upon my aunt was a great benefit
to him, as, through its means, he became known to several
of the higher circle, who began to employ him, so that
by the last of May, the time when I left Boston for Meadow
Brook, he had quite a large practice. For some reason or
other, Mrs. Archer, too, sent for him again; and as he had
now no ten thousand dollars in prospect, he succeeded in
pleasing the whimsical lady, thereby securing her patronage
for a year at least. Here, for a time, I leave him, while I
go back to the dear old home at Meadow Brook, over which
a shadow, dark and heavy, was brooding.
CHAPTER XV. THE OLD HOMESTEAD.
174
“Meadow Brook Station! Stop five minutes for refreshments!”
shouted the conductor, and alighting from the noisy,
crowded cars, I stood once more in my own native town,
gazing with a feeling of delight upon the sunny hills, dotted
over with the old-fashioned gable-roofed houses, and upon
the green, grassy meadow, through which rolled the blue
waters of the Chicopee. I had not stood thus long, when a
broad hand was laid upon my shoulder, and the next instant
my arms were around the neck of my father, who, I thought,
had changed much since last I saw him; for his face was
thin and pale, while threads of silver were scattered through
his soft, brown hair.
It was the loss of Anna, I fancied; and when we at last
were seated in the buggy, and on our way home, I hastened
to speak of her, and to tell him of the favorable report we
heard of Herbert. But naught which I said seemed to rouse
him; and at last I, too, fell into the same thoughtful mood,
in which even old Sorrel shared, for he moved with his head
down, scarcely once leaving the slow, measured walk he had
first assumed. When, at last, we reached the hill-top, from
which could be seen the Homestead, with its maple trees in
front, and long row of apple trees, now in full bloom, in the
175rear, I started up, exclaiming, “Home, sweet home! It
never looked half so beautiful to me before.”
In a moment, however, I checked myself; for my father
groaned aloud, while his face grew whiter than before.
“What is it, father,” I asked; “are they sick, or dead?”
“Neither, neither,” he replied, at the same time chirruping
to old Sorrel, who pricked up his ears, and soon carried
us to the door of our house, where I was warmly greeted by
all.
And still there was in what they said and did an air of
melancholy which puzzled me; and when I was alone with
Lizzie, I asked her the cause why they looked so sad? Bursting
into tears, she replied, “This is not our home any longer.
We must leave it, and go, we don’t know where—to
the poor-house, ’pa sometimes says, when he feels the worst,
and then grandma cries so hard—oh, it’s dreadful!”
“And why must we leave it?” I asked; and Lizzie
answered, “Pa has signed notes for Uncle Thomas, who has
failed, and now the homestead must be sold to pay his
debts—and they so proud, too!”
It was as Lizzie had said. Uncle Thomas Harding was
my mother’s brother, who lived in Providence, in far greater
style, it was said, than he was able to support. Several
times had Aunt Harding visited us, together with her two
daughters, Ellen and Theodosia. They were proud, haughty
girls, and evidently looked upon us, their country cousins,
with contempt; only tolerating us, because it was pleasant
to have some place in the country where to while away a
few weeks, which, in the heated, dusty city, would otherwise
hang heavily upon their hands. On such occasions
they made themselves perfectly at home, and somehow or
other managed to have my mother feel that she was really
indebted to them for the honor they conferred upon her, by
176calling her Aunty, by appropriating to themselves the
greater portion of the house, by skimming the cream from
the pans of milk, by eating up the pie she had saved for us
children when we came hungry and cross from school, and
by keeping old Sorrel constantly in the harness, or under the
saddle.
In return for all this, they sometimes gave us an old
collar, a silk apron, a soiled ribbon, or broken parasol—and
once, when my parents visited them, they sent us a
trunk full of rubbish, among which was Fielding’s “Tom
Jones!” This my grandmother cautiously took from the
trunk with the tongs and threw into the fire, thereby creating
in me so great a desire for a knowledge of its contents,
that, on the first occasion which presented itself, I
gratified my curiosity, feeling, when I had done so, that my
grandmother was right in disposing of the volume as she
did. Dear old lady! her aversion to everything savoring
of fiction was remarkable, and when not long since a certain
medium informed me that she, my grandmother, was greatly
distressed to learn that I had so far degenerated as to be
writing a book, I thought seriously of giving up my project
at once, and should probably have done so, had not another
medium of still greater power than the first received a communication,
stating that, after due reflection, my grandmother
had concluded that “I might continue the story
called Meadow Brook, provided I showed off my Aunt
Harding and her two daughters in their true character.”
So, as a dutiful child, it becomes me to tell how my father,
who was warmly attached to my Uncle Thomas, lent him
money from time to time, and signed notes to the amount of
several thousand dollars, never once dreaming that in the
end he would be ruined, while my uncle, influenced by his
more crafty wife, managed in some unaccountable way to
177maintain nearly the same style of living as formerly; and if
his proud daughters ever felt the ills of poverty, it was certainly
not apparent in the rich silks and costly furs which
they continued to sport.
It was a terrible blow to us all, but upon no one did it
fall so heavily as upon my father, crushing him to the earth,
and rendering him nearly as powerless as is the giant oak
when torn from its parent bed by the wrathful storm. The
old homestead was endeared to him by a thousand hallowed
associations. It was the home of his boyhood, and around
the cheerful fires, which years ago were kindled on its spacious
hearth-stone, he had played with those who long since
had passed from his side, some to mingle in the great drama
of life, and others to that world where they number not by
years. There, too, in his early manhood had he brought his
bride, my gentle mother, and on the rough bark of the towering
maples, by the side of his own and his brothers’ names,
were carved those of his children, all save little Jamie, who
died ere his tiny fingers had learned the use of knife or hammer.
No wonder, then, that his head grew dizzy and his
heart sick as he thought of leaving it forever; and when at
last the trying moment came, when with trembling hand he
signed the deed which made him homeless, who shall deem
him weak, if he laid his weary head upon the lap of his aged
mother and wept like a little child?
A small house in the village was hired, and after a few
weeks’ preparation, one bright June morning, when the
flowers we had watched over and tended with care were in
bloom, when the robins which, year after year had returned
to their nests in the maple tree, were singing their sweetest
songs, and when the blue sky bent gently over us, we bade
adieu to the spot, looking back with wistful eye until every
trace of our home had disappeared. Farewell forever to
178thee, dear old homestead, where now other footsteps tread
and other children play than those of “auld lang syne.”
The lights and shadows of years have fallen upon thee since
that summer morn, and with them have come changes to
thee as well as to us. The maple, whose branches swept
the roof above my window, making oft sad music when
tuned by the autumn wind, has been cut away, and the
robins, who brought to us the first tidings of spring, have
died or flown to other haunts. “The moss-covered bucket
which hung in the well” has been removed; the curb, whose
edges were worn by childish hands, is gone; while in place
of the violets and daisies which once blossomed on the
grassy lawn, the thistle and the burdock now are growing,
and the white rose bush by the door, from whence they
plucked the buds which strewed the coffin-bed of our baby
brother, is dead. Weeds choke the garden walks, and the
moss grows green and damp on the old stone wall. Even
the brook which ran so merrily past our door has been stopped
in its course, and its sparkling waters, bereft of freedom,
now turn the wheel of a huge saw-mill, with a low and
sullen roar. All is changed, and though memory still turns
fondly to the spot which gave me birth, I have learned to
love another home, for where my blessed mother dwells, ’tis
surely home to me. By her side there is, I know, a vacant
chair, and in her heart a lonely void, which naught on earth
can fill; but while she lives, and I know that there is in the
world for me a mother and a mother’s love, can I not feel
that I have indeed a home, though it be not the spot where
first she blessed me as her child?
CHAPTER XVI. “OUT WEST.”
179
What a train of conflicting ideas do those two words oftentimes
awaken, bringing up visions of log cabins, ladder stairs,
wooden latches, fried hominy and maple sugar, to say nothing
of the hobgoblins in the shape of bears, rattlesnakes, wolves,
and “folks who don’t know anything;” the latter being
universally considered the “staple production” of every
place bearing the name of “out West.” Even western New
York, with her hundreds of large and flourishing villages,
her well cultivated farms, her numerous schools, her educated,
intelligent people, and her vast wealth, is looked
upon with distrust by some of her eastern neighbors, because,
forsooth, her boundaries lie farther towards the setting sun,
and because she once bore the title of “way out west in
the Genesees.”
Of course I speak only from observation and personal
experience; for at Meadow Brook, ten years ago, many fears
were expressed lest Anna should miss the society to which
she had been accustomed; and when after the sale of the
homestead, she wrote, asking me to come and live with
her, I hesitated, for to me it seemed much like burying
myself from the world, particularly as she chanced to
mention that the schoolhouse was a log one, and that there
were in the neighborhood several buildings of the same
180material. Never having seen anything of the kind, I could
not then understand that there is often in a log house far
more comfort and genuine happiness than in the stateliest
mansion which graces Fifth Avenue or Beacon street; and
that the owners of said dwellings are frequently worth their
thousands, and only wait for a convenient opportunity to
build a more commodious and imposing residence.
At last, after many consultations with my parents, I
concluded to go, and about the middle of November I again
bade adieu to Meadow Brook; and in company with a
friend of my father, who was going West, I started for
Rockland, N. Y., which is in the western part of Ontario
county, and about fourteen miles from Canandaigua, at
which place Herbert was to meet me. I had never before
been west of Springfield, and when about sunset I looked
out upon the delightful prospect around Albany, I felt a
thrill of delight mingled with a feeling of pain, for I began
to have a vague impression that possibly Massachusetts,
with all her boasted privileges, could not outrival the
Empire State. It was dark, and the night lamps were
already lighted when we entered the cars at Albany; for we
were to ride all night. In front of us was an unoccupied
seat, which I turned towards me for the better accommodation
of my band-box, which contained my new bonnet;
and I was about settling myself for a nap, when a gentleman
and lady came in, the latter of whom stopping near
us, said, “Here, Richard, is a vacant seat. These folks
can’t of course expect to monopolize two;” at the same
time she commenced turning the seat back, to the great
peril of my bonnet, which, as it was made in Boston, I
confidently expected would be the envy and fashion of all
Rockland!
I was sitting with my hand over my eyes, but at the
181sound of that voice I started, and, looking up, saw before
me Ada Montrose, and with her the “dark gentleman”
who had so much interested me at the theatre. Instantly
throwing my veil over my face, for I had no wish to be
recognized, I watched him with a feeling akin to jealousy,
while he attended to the comfort of his companion,
who demeaned herself towards him much as she had
done towards Herbert Langley. All thoughts of sleep had
left me, and throughout the entire night I was awake,
speculating upon the probable relation in which he stood
to her: and once when it suddenly occurred to me that
possibly they were married, the tears actually started to my
eyes.
As the hours sped on, he said to her a few low spoken
words, whereupon she laid her head upon his shoulder, as
if that were its natural resting-place, while he threw his
arm around her, bidding her “sleep if she could.” Of
course she was his wife, I said, and with much of bitterness
at my heart, I turned away and watched the slowly-moving
lights of the canal-boats, discernible on the opposite side of
the Mohawk, along whose banks we were passing. Whether
Ada liked her pillow or not, she clung to it pertinaciously
until it seemed to me that her neck must snap asunder,
while with a martyr’s patience he supported her, dozing
occasionally himself, and bending his head so low that his
glossy black hair occasionally touched the white brow of
the sleeping girl.
“Bride and groom,” I heard a rough-looking man mutter,
as he passed them in quest of a seat, and as this confirmed
my fears, I again turned towards the window, which I
opened, so that the night-air might cool my burning cheeks.
That night I made up my mind to be an “old maid.”
Nobody would ever want me I knew, I was so homely;
182and with calm resignation I thought how much good I
would do in the world, and how I would honor the sisterhood!
Very slowly the morning light came struggling in
through the dirty windows, rousing the weary passengers,
who, rubbing their red-rimmed eyes, looked around to see
who their companions were. It was nearly noon when we
reached Canandaigua, and so carefully had I kept my face
hidden from view that Ada had no suspicion whatever of
my presence. At Canandaigua I took leave of my companion,
and stepping out upon the platform in front of the
dépôt, looked anxiously around for Herbert, but he was
not there. Thinking he would soon be there, I found my
way to the public parlor, which for few moments I occupied
alone. I had just removed my dusty bonnet, and was
brushing my tangled hair, when the door opened, and I
stood face to face with Ada Montrose, who started back,
and for a moment evidently debated the propriety of recognizing
me. Thinking she might do just as she pleased, I
simply nodded, as I would to any stranger, and went on
with my toilet, while throwing herself upon the sofa, she
exclaimed, “Dear me, how tired I am! Do you live here?”
“Of course not,” I answered; “I am on my way to visit
my sister Anna, whom you perhaps remember.”
She turned very red, and replied by asking if I were in
the train which had just passed.
“Yes,” I answered; “I occupied the seat directly behind
you and—your husband—is it not?”
I felt that I must know the truth, and hence the rather
impertinent question, which, however, did not seem to displease
her in the least. Affecting to be a little embarrassed,
she said, “Not my husband—yet. He came on to Boston
to accompany me home, and wishing to see a friend of his,
who lives here, we have stopped over one train.”
183I know not why it was, but her words gave me comfort;
while at the same time the state of single-blessedness
appeared to me far less attractive than it had a few hours
before! I was on the point of asking her about my aunt,
when the door again opened and there stood before us a
slovenly-looking man, attired in a slouched hat, muddy
pantaloons, grey coat, and huge cow-hide boots. So complete
was the metamorphosis that neither of us recognized
him, until he had exclaimed, as his eye fell upon Ada,
“Good Heavens, Ade! How came you here?” Then we
knew it was Herbert Langley!
So astonished was I that it was some time ere I found
voice to return his rather noisy greeting. Try as he would,
he could not conceal the fact that he was rather disconcerted
at being seen by Ada in such a plight, and after a
little he stammered out an apology, saying he was a farmer
now, and lived in the country, and of course could not be
expected to dress as he used in the city. This, I knew, was
no excuse, and I trembled lest he might be changed in more
points than one.
“How is your wife, Mrs. Langley?” asked Ada, in a mocking,
deferential tone.
Instantly the whole expression of Herbert’s face was
changed, and there was a look of tenderness and pride in his
eyes as he advanced towards Ada, and whispered in her ear
something which I did not understand. Whatever it was, it
made her blush, as she replied rather sneeringly, “Of course
I congratulate you.”
It has always been my misfortune to be rather stupid in
some matters, and I had not the least idea what either of
them meant, or why Herbert was to be congratulated.
Possibly I might have asked an explanation, but just then
the town clock struck the hour of one, and turning towards
184me, he said, it was time we were on our way, for the fall
rains had made the roads almost impassable, and he was
afraid we should not reach home before dark. “So put on
your things quick,” he added. “The carriage is all ready.”
This last he said laughingly, for the carriage proved to be
a long lumber wagon, such as is seldom found in Massachusetts,
or at least, I had never seen one like it before, and
it became a serious question in my mind as to how I was
expected to enter it, there being no possible way of doing
so, save by climbing over the wheels, which were reeking
with mud. Herbert seemed to enjoy my embarrassment,
for he asked me if “I didn’t think I could step from
the ground into the box,” a distance of several feet? I
was soon relieved from my difficulty by the porter, who
placed before me some wooden steps, on which I mounted
safely, and seated myself in the large arm-chair, which, with
its warm buffalo-robes, was really more comfortable than
the old-fashioned one-horse wagons of New England,
though I did not think so then; and when the spirited horses,
at a crack from Herbert’s whip, sprang forward, while I,
losing my balance, pitched over backward, I began to cry,
wishing in my heart that I was back in Meadow Brook.
It was a cold, raw, autumnal day. The roads, as Herbert
had said, were horrible; and as we ploughed through the
thick mud, which, in some places was up to the wheel hubs,
I took, I believe, my first lesson in genuine home-sickness,
which, in my opinion, is about as hard to bear as love-sickness!
Indeed, I think they feel much alike—the latter
being, perhaps, a very little the worse of the two! It was
in vain that Herbert pointed out to me the many handsome
farmhouses which we passed, expatiating upon the richness
and fertility of the soil, and telling me how greatly superior
in everything New York was to New England. I scarcely
185heard him, for even though in all Massachusetts there was
naught save the rocky hills, and sterile plains, it was my
home, and from that spot the heart cannot easily be
weaned.
Rockland is a large, wealthy town, embracing within its
limits more than the prescribed rule of six miles square,
while scattered through it are two or three little villages,
each bearing a distinct name, by which they are known
abroad. First, there was Laurel Hill, famed as the residence
of certain families who were styled proud and aristocratic—to
say nothing of their being Episcopalians, which
last fact was by some regarded as the main cause of their
haughtiness. Next came the “Centre,” with its group of
red houses, and its single spire, so tall, so straight, and so
square, that it scarce needed the lettering over the entrance
to tell to the stranger that Presbyterians worshiped
there. Lastly came Flattville, by far the largest village
in Rockland, and the home of all the isms in the known
world. To the south of Flattville is a small lake,
renowned for its quiet beauty, and the picturesque wildness
of its shores. Bounded on three sides by high hills, its
waters sleep calmly in the sunlight of summer, or dash
angrily upon the sandy beach, when moved by the chill
breath of winter.
On the brow of one of the high hills which overlook the
Honeoye, and so near to it that the sweep of the waves can
be distinctly heard in a clear, still night, stood the home of
my sister. It was a huge, wooden building, containing
rooms innumerable, while even the basement was large
enough to accommodate one or more families. Being the
first frame house erected in the town, it was of course
looked upon with considerable interest, and as if to make it
still more notorious, it bore the reputation of being haunted,
186and by some of the neighbors was called the “Haunted
Castle.”
Years before, when the country was new, it was a sort of
public-house, and a young girl was said to have been murdered
there, and buried in the cellar, from whence she was
afterwards removed and thrown into the lake. For the
truth of this story there was no proof, save the fact, that in
the dark cellar there was a slight excavation, supposed to
have been the grave of the ill-fated lady. All this Herbert
very kindly told me, as we rode leisurely along, saying, when
I asked if he believed it, “Believe it! No! Of course
not. To be sure, it’s the squeakiest old rattle-trap of a
house that I ever saw; and were I at all superstitious, I
could readily believe it haunted, particularly when the
wind blows hard. But you are not frightened; are you?”
he asked, looking in my face, which was very pale.
I hold that there is in every human breast a dread of the
supernatural, and though I do not by any means believe in
ghosts, I would certainly prefer not to live in a house where
they are supposed to dwell. Still, I dared not tell Herbert
so, and, consequently, I only laughed at the idea of a
haunted house, saying, it was very romantic. It was after
sunset when we at last turned into the long avenue, shaded
on either side by forest maples, which the first proprietor of
the place had suffered to remain; and as my eye fell upon
the large, dark building, which Herbert said was his house,
I involuntarily shuddered, for to me it seemed the very spot
of all others which goblins would choose for their nightly
revels. The wind was blowing from the west, and as I followed
Herbert up to the door, my ear caught a dull, moaning
sound, which caused me to quicken my footsteps, while
I asked, in some trepidation, what it was.
“That? Oh, that’s the roar of the lake. Don’t you see
187how near it is to us, directly at the foot of the hill?” and he
pointed out to me the broad sheet of water, just discernible
in the gathering darkness.
A sudden gust of wind swept past me, and again I caught
the low murmur. There was something human in the tone,
and though for three years I almost daily heard that sound,
I could never fully rid myself of the impression that it was
the spirit of the murdered maiden which thus, to the swelling
waves, complained of the crime long unpunished.
“Come this way, Rose,” said Herbert, as I entered the
narrow “entry” so common in old-fashioned houses; and following
him, I was soon ushered into a large square room,
where a bright wood fire was blazing, casting a somewhat
cheerful aspect over the sombre, wainscoted walls of ancient
make.
In one corner of the room was a bed, and on it lay Anna,
who, the moment she saw me, uttered a cry of joy.
“Have you told her?” she asked of Herbert, when the
first pleasure of our meeting was over.
He replied in the negative, whereupon she brought up
from under a pile of pillows, coverlets, blankets and sheets,
a little tiny, red-faced, wrinkled thing, to which she said I
was Aunt! I knew, then, why Ada congratulated Herbert,
and mentally chiding myself for my stupidity, I took the
bundle of cambric and flannel in my arms, while Anna said,
“We call him Jamie Lee, and we think he looks like you.
Isn’t he a beauty?”
He did look like me, and knowing that, I wondered at
Anna’s question; but where is the young mother who thinks
her first born baby homely?—though his nose be flat—his
forehead low—and his mouth extend from ear to ear! Not
Anna, most certainly. He was her baby and Herbert’s, and to
her partial eyes he was beautiful, even though he did resemble
188me, whom but one person had ever called pretty. As
for myself, I hardly knew whether to be pleased with my
new relative or not. Babies, particularly little tiny ones,
had never been my special delight, but on this occasion, feeling
that some demonstration was expected from me, I kissed
my little nephew, who returned my greeting with a wry face,
and an outcry so loud that Anna, in great alarm lest he was
“going into a fit,” summoned from the kitchen, where she
was enjoying a quiet smoke, Aunty Matson, who boasted of
having washed and dressed two hundred and fifty babies,
and who confidently expected to do the same service for two
hundred and fifty more ere her life’s sun was set.
Wearied with my ride, I asked permission to retire early;
whereupon Dame Matson volunteered to show me the way
to my room. Up the narrow stairs, which creaked at every
step, and on through one gloomy room after another, she
led me until, at last, we came to a chamber, lighter and
more airy, which, she said, my sister had papered, painted,
and fitted up for me; adding, as she set the candle upon the
table and closed the window, “You ain’t afraid of spooks
nor nothin’?”
“Spooks” was to me a new word, and in some surprise I
asked what she meant.
“Now, du tell,” she replied, seating herself upon the foot
of the bed. “Now, du tell a body where you was brought
up, that you don’t know what a spook is! Why, it’s a sperrit—a
ghost—and this house, they say, is full on ’em. But I
don’t b’lieve a word on’t. S’posin’ a gal was murdered near
forty years ago, ’tain’t likely she haunts the place yet, and
then, too, she warn’t none of the best of girls, I guess, from
what I’ve heard my mother say.”
The wind was blowing hard, and as Dame Matson uttered
these last words, the door, which she had left ajar, came together
189with a bang, while from the lake I heard again the
wailing cry, which, this time, had in it an angry tone, as if
the maiden were indignant at the wrong done her by the old
dame, whose eyes seemed to expand and grow blacker at
the sound. Overcome as I was with fatigue, I could not
sleep; and for hours I lay awake, listening to the rain as it
fell upon the roof, and to the howling wind, which, indeed,
produced the most unearthly noises I had ever heard. At
last, however, nature could no longer endure, and I fell into
a deep slumber, from which I did not awake until the sun was
high up in the heavens, and preparations were going forward
in the kitchen for dinner, which was served exactly at
twelve. Greatly refreshed, I was ready to laugh at my
fears of the night previous; and with childish joy, I explored
every nook and corner of the old castle; finding many a rathole,
which threw some light on the sounds over my head,
which I had likened to the trampling of horses.
It took but a few days for me to discover that Herbert
was exceedingly popular at Breeze Hill, as the neighborhood
in which he lived was called. His free, social manners had
won for him many friends, and made him almost too much
of a favorite. At least, I used to think so, during the long
winter evenings, when Anna sat with her baby upon her
lap, listening for the footsteps of her husband, who, at some
neighbor’s fireside, was cracking the merry joke, and quaffing
the sparkling cider; which, at Breeze Hill, was considered
essential to hospitality. Gradually, too, as the winter wore
on, my sister’s eye took the anxious expression I had so
often seen in my Aunt Charlotte; and sometimes, when he
stayed from her longer than usual, she would steal down to
the foot of the long Avenue, and there, alone, would wait
and listen for her husband’s coming; while the spirit from
the lake would whisper sadly in her ear of the darkness
190and desolation hovering near. And all this time Herbert
professed to be strictly temperate; and when, about the
middle of March, a travelling lecturer held forth in the old
log schoolhouse, thundering his anathemas against the use
of all spirituous liquors, Herbert was the most zealous
of all his listeners, and at the close of the lecture, arose
himself and addressed the assembly, pouring out such a tide
of eloquence as astonished the audience, who rent the air
with shouts of “Langley forever!”
Knowing this, I was greatly surprised, after our return
home, to see the young orator go up to the sideboard and
drink off, at one draught, a goblet of the porter which had
been ordered for Anna! She saw it, too, and for an instant
her face was pressed against that of her sleeping boy; and
when next the lamp-light fell upon it, I saw there traces of
tears, while a faint smile played around her mouth, as she
said, “I am afraid, Herbert, your audience would hardly
think your theory and practice agree, could they see you
now.”
The words were ill-timed; for they awoke the young
man’s resentment, and with a flushed brow he retorted angrily,
that “if porter were good for her, it was for him; he
saw no difference between a drinking woman and a drinking
man; except, indeed, that the former was the most
despicable.”
The next morning, the bottles of porter were gone from
the sideboard; but out in the orchard, where the grass of
an early spring was just starting into life, they lay shattered
in a hundred pieces. Would, oh, would that she, the wife
of little more than a year, could thus easily have broken the
habits of him she loved better than her life. But it could
not be; and all through the bright spring days she drooped,
and faded, and struggled hard to keep from me the fatal
191truth; and when the warm breath of summer was over all
the land; when the robins’ song was heard in the maple
trees; and the roses blossomed by the open door, they
brought no gladness to her heart; no love-light to her eye,
save when she looked upon her baby; now a playful, handsome
child, the pet and idol of the house.
At last, Aunt Charlotte wrote to me, asking to be assured
of her son’s safety; and then poor Anna begged me not to
tell that the wine-cup was his companion at morn; his solace
at noon, and his comfort at night. Yielding to her
entreaties, I answered evasively; and thus the shock, when
it came to that mother’s heart, was harder far to bear, from
the perfect security she had felt. At Meadow Brook, too,
they little dreamed how their absent daughter wept and
prayed over her fallen husband, who, day after day, made
rapid strides down the road to death; for, on her bended
knees, Anna implored me to keep her shame a secret yet a
little longer; and with this request I also complied, doing
whatever I could to smooth the thorny pathway she was
treading.
CHAPTER XVII. THE DARK MAN.
192
The long summer days had merged into autumn, whose
hazy breath floated like a misty veil over the distant hills.
Slowly and noiselessly the leaves were dropping one by one
from the maple trees, strewing the withered grass with
a carpet of gorgeous hue. The birds had sung their farewell
song to their summer nests, and were off for a warmer
clime; while here and there busy hands and feet were seen
gathering in the autumnal stores.
On Herbert’s farm, however, there was a look of decay.
The yellow corn and golden pumpkins were yet in the field;
the apples lay in heaps upon the ground; the gates swung
loosely in the wind; while the horses, uncared for and unfed,
neighed piteously in their stalls as if asking why they
were thus neglected. Alas! their master was a drunkard.
Anna was a drunkard’s wife; and mine a drunkard’s
home! It was no longer a secret there, and the
old men shook their heads, while the young men sighed to
think how he had fallen. Night after night we sat up for
him, my sister and I lifting him from the threshold across
which he would fall, and bearing him to his bed, where we
would lay him beside his innocent son, whose blue eyes
often opened with wonder at being thus disturbed. A
night’s debauch was always followed by a day of weakness
and debility, in which he was incapable of exertion, and so
193everything seemed on the verge of ruin, when he suddenly
conceived the idea of advertising for an efficient man, who
would take the entire charge of affairs and relieve him from
all care.
About this time I went back to Meadow Brook for a few
weeks to be present at the bridal of my oldest sister. Anna,
too, was urged to accompany me, but she declined, extorting
from me a promise that if it were possible I would not
divulge the real state of things. “Tell them I am happy
and do not regret what I have done,” said she, as she followed
me down to the gate.
“And would that be true?” I asked, looking her in the
face.
For an instant she hesitated, while her pale cheeks flushed
and the tears started to her eyes; then glancing at little
Jamie, whom she held in her arms, she answered, “Yes, it
would be true. I do not regret it. I had rather be Herbert’s
wife as he is, than not to have been his wife at all.”
Ah, who can fathom the depths of woman’s love, and
what punishment shall be sufficient for him who wantonly
tramples upon it. Thus I thought as I turned away
from my sister, pondering upon her words long after I
reached the cars, and wondering if I should ever love as she
did. Involuntarily the doctor rose up before me—a drunkard,
and I his wife, and from my inmost soul I answered, “rather
death than that!” Then, though I blushed as I did so,
I fancied myself the wife of “the dark man,” and he a
drunkard. “Yes, I could bear that,” I said, and as if to
make the old adage true, that a certain individual is always
near when we are talking about him, the car door opened
and the subject of my meditations stood before me!
There was no mistaking him. The same tall, manly form,
the piercing eyes, the coal black hair and the same deep
194cut between the eyebrows. I knew him in a moment, and
an exclamation of surprise escaped my lips, which, however,
was lost by the rush of the cars. The seats were
nearly all occupied, and as he passed down the aisle, my
readers, I trust, will pardon me, if I did gather up the skirt
of my dress and take my travelling bag upon my lap, while
I myself sat nearer to the window, looking out in order to
hide my face, which I thought possibly might not attract
him!
“Is this seat occupied, miss?” said a heavy voice, which
seemed to come from some far off region.
“No, sir,” I answered, timidly, without venturing to turn
my head, until I felt myself uncomfortably crowded; then I
looked around, and behold! the dark stranger was sitting
behind me near the door, while at my side was a man of
mammoth dimensions, with immense moustaches, watery eyes,
and a brandy breath flavored with tobacco!
I wanted to cry, and should probably have done so, had
not my companion immediately commenced a conversation by
asking “if I had come very far, and where I was going?”
He was exceedingly loquacious, and for several hours
plied me with questions as to my own name—my parents—my
grand-parents—my brothers—my sisters—our standing
in the world—our religion—our politics, and our opinion
of spiritualism, of which last he was a zealous advocate.
At length just as it was growing dark, he gathered up his
huge proportions, and to my great joy bade me adieu, expressing
his regret at leaving me, and also assuring me that
I would one day be a medium, which assumption he based
upon the fact of my having admitted that sometimes when
falling away to sleep I started suddenly and awoke. This,
he said, was a spirit shock, and would in the end lead to
great results.
195About nine o’clock we stopped for refreshments, and on
re-ëntering the cars, I found to my joy that the dark
stranger’s seat was appropriated by a son of Erin, who
seemed nowise inclined to surrender it, inasmuch as he
had with him his wife, baby, and bundle. This time the
fates were propitious, for after looking around him awhile,
the stranger asked permission to sit by me, saying he should
not discommode me more than two or three hours, as by that
time he hoped to reach his journey’s end, a remark which
gave me more pain than pleasure, for every nerve thrilled
with joy at being thus near to one who, though an entire
stranger, possessed for me a particular attraction. It was
quite dark where we sat, and the night lamp burned but
dimly, so he did not once obtain a full view of my face. He
proved a most agreeable and attentive companion, opening
and shutting the window just as often as I evinced an inclination
to have him, holding my sachel in his lap; placing
his own travelling trunk at my feet for a footstool, and
offering me his fur-lined overcoat for a pillow; besides expressing
many fears that I would take cold whenever the
window was open. At almost every station, too, he asked
“if I wished for anything,” but I did not, except indeed to
know whether he was yet the husband of Ada Montrose,
and to obtain that information I would have given almost
anything. At last I hit upon the following expedient. He
made some remark about the country through which we
were passing, and I replied by saying that “I believed it
was not the first time he had been over that road, as, if I
mistook not, I saw him in the cars with his wife the year
before.”
The wrinkle in his forehead grew deeper, and his face
flushed as he said quickly, “I do not remember of meeting
you before, though I was here last fall, but not with my
196wife, for I have none. It was my ward, Miss Montrose.”
Nothing could have given me more satisfaction than this
announcement, for if Ada were his ward, it explained, in a
measure, his attentions to her; and as I cast stolen glances
at him, I felt more and more convinced that there could be
no affinity between him and the haughty, imperious girl to
whom he was guardian. It seemed to me a very short time
ere he arose, and offering me his hand, said he must go,
adding, “We shall undoubtedly meet again, as I occasionally
travel this way.”
Yes, we should meet again. I felt sure of that, though
how and where I could not tell.
It was nearly noon of the next day when I reached
Meadow Brook, where I found my father at the dépôt,
waiting to receive me. Very kindly he greeted me, inquiring
eagerly after Anna and her boy, his grandson, whom he
expressed a strong desire to see. “But I never shall,” he
said sadly, as he walked slowly beside me up the long hill
which led to the village. Of Herbert he spoke not a word,
though my mother and my sisters did, asking me numberless
questions, some of which I answered, while the others I
managed to evade, keeping them ignorant of the existing
state of things.
I found them all busied with the preparations for Juliet’s
wedding, which took place within a week after my return,
I officiating as bridesmaid, while the groomsman was none
other than my old enemy, John Thompson, now a tall young
man of eighteen, and cousin to Juliet’s husband. When
first the plan was suggested to me I refused, for I bore him
no good will; but my objections were overruled by Juliet,
who told me how much he had improved, and that I would
find him very agreeable, which was indeed true. He was
197very polite and attentive, referring laughingly to the “freaks
of his boyhood,” as he termed them, while at the same time
he laid his hand upon his chin, caressing the beard which
was there only in imagination, and even apologizing to me
in a kind of off-hand way for his conduct of three years
before. Of course I forgave him, and we are now the best
of friends. So much for childish prejudices.
In the course of the evening I asked him about the doctor,
and was told that he was still in Boston, and doing
remarkably well. “And do you know,” said John, “he
imputes his success to you! I verily believe he thinks you
a perfect angel! Any way, I know he likes you better than
he does Dell, for he told me so in plain English, and I don’t
blame him either; the way she cuts up is enough to kill any
man. Why, if I were in his place, I’d get a divorce from
her at once, and offer myself to you!”
“I wouldn’t have him,” said I, quickly.
“Nor me either? Wouldn’t you have me?” asked John,
playfully.
“No, I wouldn’t,” was my reply; whereupon he laughed
heartily, saying “he was glad he knew my sentiments before
he committed himself;” and there the conversation ended.
After Juliet had left us for her new home, in an adjoining
town, there ensued at our house a season of lonely quiet, in
which we scarcely knew whether to laugh or to cry. There is
always something sad in the giving up of a daughter to the
care of another, and so my parents found it, particularly my
father, who, broken in spirit and feeble in health, was unusually
cast down. He could hardly suffer me to leave his
sight for a moment, and still he seemed to take special pleasure
in finding fault with whatever I did. Nothing pleased
him, and gradually there returned upon me with its full
force the olden fancy of my childhood, that I was not loved
198like the rest. It was a most bitter thought, wringing my
heart with a keener anguish than it had ever done before;
and once, the very day before the one set for my return to
Rockland, my pent up feelings burst forth, and in angry
tones I told him “it was useless for me to try to please
him—he didn’t love me and never had—and I was glad that
the morrow would find me away, where he would no longer
be troubled with my presence, which was evidently so disagreeable
to him.”
He made me no answer, but a fearful look of sorrow,
which will haunt me to my dying day, passed over his thin,
white face, and his hand, which was hard and brown with
toil for me, was raised beseechingly as if to stay the angry
torrent. Oh, how I repented of my harshness then, but I
did not tell him so; I would wait till morning, and then,
ere I left, I would seek the forgiveness, without which I well
knew I should be wretched, for something told me that
never in this world should we meet again.
Next morning when I awoke, the sun was shining
brightly in at my window, and hurrying on my clothes, I
descended to the dining-room. In silence we gathered
around the breakfast table, and then I saw that my father
was absent. “Where was he?” I asked, and was told that
having business in Southbridge, a town several miles distant,
he had left early, telling my mother to bid me good-bye for
him. All my good resolutions were forgotten, and again I
said hastily, “I think he might at least have bidden me
good-bye himself, and you may tell him so.”
“Hush, Rose, hush,” said my mother. “Your father isn’t
the man he was before we left our old home. He is broken
down, and it may be you have seen him for the last
time.”
“It is hardly probable,” I answered, and with a swelling
199heart I bade my mother adieu; but I left no message which
would tell my father how much I repented of my rashness.
Upon his grave the tall grass is growing—howling storms
have swept across it—wintry snows have been piled upon
it—the summer’s mellow sunlight has fallen around it—flowers
have blossomed and faded—changes have come to
us all—and still I have never ceased to regret that last interview
with my father, or to mourn over my distrust of his
love for me.
CHAPTER XVIII. THE DEATH OF THE DRUNKARD.
200
During my journey back to Rockland, I did not again
meet with the stranger, although I looked for him at every
station, and when at last I stepped from the cars at Canandaigua,
I must confess to a feeling of disappointment. I
had expected Herbert to meet me, but he was not there.
I was just wondering what I should do in case he failed to
come, when my attention was attracted towards a tall,
athletic-looking young man, who was inspecting my trunk,
which stood upon the platform. Fearful lest my best
clothes should be carried off before my very face, I started
quickly forward, demanding what he was doing with my
baggage.
The stranger stood up, and fixed upon me a pair of singularly
handsome, hazel eyes, which had in them an expression
so penetrating that I quailed beneath them; while at
the same time there swept over me a strange, undefined
feeling as if somewhere in a dream, perchance, I had met
that glance before.
“Are you Miss Lee?” he asked, and the tones of his
voice thrilled me like an echo of the past.
I replied in the affirmative; and without once taking his
eyes from my face, he said, “I am Henry Watson, Mr.
201Langley’s hired man. He sent me for you, and the wagon
is at the other door.”
Mechanically I followed him to the place designated, and
then, as if I had been a feather, he took me in his arms and
placed me in the wide chair, wrapping the buffalo-robes
around me, and in various ways seeing that I was comfortable.
He did not seem to me like a hireling, for his
language was good, his manners gentlemanly, and ere we
were half-way to Breeze Hill I was very much prepossessed
in his favor, except, indeed, that he would look at me so
much. He was quite talkative, asking me of my parents,
of my brothers, and appearing much gratified when I told
him how well Charlie was doing as clerk in a dry goods
store in Worcester.
“And Mr. Langley is only your cousin by marriage?” he
said at last. “Have you any other male cousins?” he
asked.
“I had a boy cousin once,” I said, “but he is probably
dead, for we have not heard from him in six long years.”
Forgetful that Mr. Watson was to me an entire stranger,
I very briefly told him the story of “Cousin Will,” who returned
not with the vessel which bore him away, and who
had deserted the ship at Calcutta. For many days they
searched for him in vain, and at last left him alone in that
far off land, where he had probably met an early death.
“He must have been a wild boy, and I dare say you felt
relieved to be rid of him,” said Mr. Watson, who had
appeared deeply interested in my story.
“Yes, he was wild,” I replied, “but I liked him very,
very much, and cried myself sick when he went away.”
Again the stranger’s eyes fell upon me with a look I could
not fathom. I grew uneasy, and was not sorry when about
sunset we turned into the long, shady avenue which led up
202to the house. As if by magic, a wondrous change had been
wrought in my absence; for everything around the building
wore an air of neatness and thrift, which betokened that
there was now a head to manage and direct. Herbert, too,
was perfectly sober, while Anna’s face was far happier than
when I last saw her. The cause of this she explained to
me the first moment we were alone. Herbert had signed
the pledge! Had become a sober man, and all through
the exertions of Mr. Watson, whom she pronounced an
angel in disguise. And, truly, his influence over Herbert
was wonderful; for never did an anxious mother watch
over her sickly child more carefully than Mr. Watson
watched over his employer, shielding him from temptation,
and gently leading him in the path of rectitude; until the
wine-flush on his cheek gave way to a hue of health; the
redness of his eyes was gone, and conscious of the victory
he had achieved, he stood forth again in all the pride of his
manhood, sober, virtuous, and happy.
Such was the state of things, when, early in April, we
received invitations to attend a wedding party at the house
of Judge Perkins, whose broad acres and heavy purse of gold
had purchased for him a fair young girl, just his eldest
daughter’s age! It was to be a splendid affair, for all the
élite of Rockland were bidden, and, as a matter of course, I
forthwith commenced looking over my wardrobe, and declaring
I had nothing to wear! Anna, on the contrary, did
not seem at all interested, and when I questioned her for
her indifference, she replied, “What if they have wine, and
Herbert should drink?”
“They wouldn’t have wine,” I told her, for Judge Perkins
was a staunch temperance man, and it was not probable
that he would do anything so inconsistent with his profession.
203After a time she became convinced that her fears were
groundless, and began with me to anticipate the expected
pleasure. Henry Watson was not invited, but he carried
us to the door, going himself to the hotel to wait until we
were ready to return. Just as he was leaving us he whispered
a few words to Herbert, who replied, gaily, “Never
fear for me. Judge Perkins isn’t the man to throw temptation
in my way.”
Ah, would it had been so! Would that the sparkling
champagne, the ruby wine, and the foaming ale had not
graced that marriage feast, for then, perchance, one grave
at least would not have been made so soon, nor the widow’s
weeds worn by my sister ere the bloom of youth had faded
from her brow.
I saw her cheek pale as we entered the supper-room, but
when amid the din and uproar which succeeded the drawing of
the corks, Herbert stood firm to his pledge, refusing to drink,
though urged to do so, the color came back to her face, and her
eye proudly followed her husband, whose easy manners made
him a favorite, and who, with ready tact, moved among the
guests, doing far more towards their entertainment than the
master of the house himself. He was standing near the bride, a
beautiful young creature, with a sunny face and radiant
smile. Diamonds were wreathed in her shining curls, and
shone upon her snowy arms, while the costly veil almost
swept the floor, and enveloped her slight form like a misty
cloud. Very affable and polite had she been to Herbert,
and now as he approached her, she took from the table two
goblets of wine, and passing one to him, said, “Mr. Langley,
I am sure, will not refuse to drink with me, the bride?”
To refuse would have seemed uncourteous; and so, with a
hasty glance at his wife, he drank the health of the lovely
woman, who, in an angel’s guise, unconsciously tempted him
204to ruin. Involuntarily, Anna gasped as if for breath, while
she started quickly forward to stay the rash act; but she
was too late, and with a faint moan of anguish, she turned
away to hide her tears. One taste awoke the slumbering
demon, and set his veins on fire; and when at midnight Mr.
Watson came for us, he took the insensible man in his arms
and placed him in the wagon, beside the weeping wife,
whose fond hopes were now wrecked for ever.
From that time Herbert made no further attempt at reform,
but night after night, came reeling home, sometimes
singing a bacchanalian song, and again rending the air with
curses, until at last poor Anna learned to tremble at the sound
of his footsteps; for he daily grew more and more violent and
unmanageable, defying every one save Mr. Watson, who
possessed over him a singular power. Thus the spring and
summer passed away, and when the autumn came few would
have recognized the once handsome Herbert Langley in the
bloated creature, who, weak and feeble, lay all day long in
bed, begging for “brandy—more brandy” to fan the flame
which was feeding upon his vitals. Sometimes in his fits of
frenzy he would spring upon the floor, and shriek for us to
save him from the crawling serpents, which, with forked
tongues and little green eyes, hissed at him from all parts
of the room. Again he would say that the spirit of the
murdered maiden was before him, whispering to him unutterable
things concerning the drunkard’s home beyond the
grave, while goblins of every conceivable form beckoned
him to come and join their hideous dance.
Once, when he was more quiet than usual, he said to me,
“Rose, do you remember what I once told you about my
mother’s joining the church and reading her prayers?”
I replied in the affirmative, and he continued—“Do you
know I’d give the world, were it mine, if I could hear her
205pray for me once more. It would cool my scorching brain,
and if I dare pray for myself, I know I should be healed;
but I cannot, for the moment I attempt it, there are legions
of imps who flit and grin before my face, while one, larger
and more unseemly than the rest, shouts in my ears, ‘Lost,
lost, to all eternity!’ there—look, don’t you hear it?” and,
shivering with fright, he covered his head with the bed-clothes.
But I heard nothing save the heaving swell of the waves,
and the sullen roar of the lake, which came in through the
open window, seeming to his disordered imagination an accusing
spirit from another world. At last looking up timidly
and speaking low, as if fearful of being overheard, he said,
“Is there a Prayer Book in the house?”
I answered in the affirmative. Raising himself upon his
elbow, and glancing fearfully around, he continued, “Bring
it quick, while they are away, and put it under my pillow.
Who knows but it may operate like a spell!”
I complied with his request, and brought the book, which
he placed under his head, saying, “There—now I can pray,
and God won’t let them mock me, will he, think?”
I could only weep as he folded his long white hands one
over the other, and said reverently the prayer taught him
years and years before, commencing with—
“Now I lay me down to sleep,” etc.
As if the words, indeed, had a soothing power, he almost
instantly fell into a deep sleep, from which he awoke refreshed,
and better than he had been for several days. They
said he could not live; and though it was a painful task, Anna
wrote to his mother apprising her of his danger, and bidding
her hasten, if she would see him again.
During the few remaining weeks of his life he was subject
to strange fancies. For a time the Prayer Book beneath
206his pillow had the effect of keeping him comparatively quiet;
but, anon, it lost its power, and one day he awoke with a
fearful shriek. The imps, as he called them, had again returned,
and were mockingly taunting him with the victory
he vainly imagined he had obtained.
“Keep off, ye devils!” he shouted, drawing the volume
from beneath his pillow, and holding it to view. “Keep
off; for, see, this book is full of prayers, which my mother
has said. My mother! Do you hear? Ha! They laugh
at the idea, and well they may. Had she learned to pray
sooner, I might not have been the vile thing that I am. But
she taught me to drink. She set the example; so go to her
with those horrid faces, besmeared with the smoke of the pit.”
There was a bitter groan, and then the wretched woman,
his mother, fell half fainting upon a chair. She had just arrived,
and eager to see her boy, had entered the room in
time to hear what he said. He knew her in a moment, and
starting upright in bed, exclaimed, “Woman, look—this is
your work—the result of your example. There was a time,
long ago—how long ago it seems—but there was a time,
I say, when I loathed the very smell of the liquors, which
daily graced our table. By little and by little that loathing
was overcome. You drank and called it good; and what
one’s mother says is true. So I, too, tasted and tasted again
until here I am, Herbert Langley, husband of Anna Lee,
ruined body and soul—body and soul! What do you say
to that, mother?”
He sank back upon the bed exhausted; while Aunt Charlotte,
who had swooned entirely away, was taken from the
room. The shock was too great for her, and for two days she
did not again venture into his presence. The next time, however,
that she saw him, his mood had changed, and winding
his feeble arms around her neck, he wept like a child, asking
207her to take from his heart the worm which was knawing
there. Oh, how I pitied the heartbroken woman! for
I well knew she would gladly have lain down her life could
that have saved her son. For three days longer he lingered,
and then there came the closing scene, which haunted me
for months.
He had been restless during the night, muttering incoherently,
and occasionally striking at the fancied shapes which
surrounded him; but towards morning he grew more violent,
and at last with a shriek which chilled my blood, he sprang
from the bed, and pointing towards the window, whispered,
“Hark! Don’t you hear it?—music from the infernal regions!
They are come, every demon of them, for me. It’s
a grand turnout. There! Don’t you see them with their
flaming eyes looking through the windows, and that shriveled
hag, whose hair is curling snakes! See! She beckons
me with her bony claws, and says I am to be her son. Do
you hear that mother? Her son! Go back!” he shouted,
leaping towards the window. “You don’t get me this time.
I won’t die yet. Give me the Prayer Book, and let me hurl
it at her head—that’ll settle her, I reckon.”
He would have gone through the window, had not Mr.
Watson taken him in his arms and borne him back to the
bed, where he held him fast, soothing him as best he could
by assuring him there were no such unearthly objects in the
room as he supposed.
“I know it,” said Herbert, for a moment comparatively
rational. “I know what it is. It is DELIRIUM TREMENS, and
I know what causes it, too; shall I tell you?”
Mr. Watson nodded, and Herbert continued: “Cider,
beer, wine, brandy—DEATH: that’s the programme which
keeps the fire of hell eternally burning. Where is my boy—Anna’s
boy and mine?” he asked after a pause.
208“Do you wish to see him,” asked Mr. Watson.
“See him? Yes. I want to do one good deed before I
die. I would kill him—murder my only child, and send him
to Heaven, where rumsellers never go—where women, with
witching eyes and luring words, never tempt men to drink.
Bring him in: why do you loiter?” turning to Anna. “Is
it that you would have him live to be the wreck I am—to
curse the mother who bore him and the day he was born!
Bring him quick, I tell you, for time hastens, and in the distance
I hear the clank of the hag’s footsteps.”
“Oh, Herbert, Herbert, my poor husband,” was all Anna
could say, as she wound her arms around his neck and laid
her colorless cheek against his fevered brow.
In a moment he grew calm, and drawing her to his bosom,
his tears fell like rain upon her face, while he called her his
“wounded dove,” and asked her forgiveness for all he had
made her suffer. “You will live with mother when I am
gone,” he said. “You and Jamie. God forbid that I should
harm our beautiful boy; but I would see him once more.
Don’t be afraid,” he added, as he saw her hesitate. “I will
not hurt him.”
Disengaging herself from her husband’s embrace, Anna
glided from the room, to which she soon returned, leading
little Jamie, now two years of age. Very lovingly the dying
man looked upon his son, and then laying his shaking hand
upon the golden curls, he said, “God keep you, my boy,
from being what I am; and if a drunkard’s blessing can be
of any avail, you have mine, my precious, precious child.”
“Would you like to kiss him?” asked Aunt Charlotte; to
which he replied, “No, no; I am too polluted to touch
aught so pure. But take him away,” he continued, growing
excited. “Take him away, for the demon on my pillow is
again whispering of murder.”
209Hastily the wondering child was taken from the room,
and then Herbert fell into a disturbed slumber, in which he
seemed to be holding converse with beings of another world,
inquiring of them if they had enough to drink, and chiding
the rich man for asking water, when he might as well call
for brandy!
About noon he awoke and inquired for me. With some
trepidation I approached him, for his eyes were those of a
madman; but he meditated no harm, and only asked if I
supposed that the Prayer Book laid upon the outside of his
pillow, where the hag could see it, would have the effect of
keeping her away.
“Perhaps so,” I said, at the same time placing it so that
his heavy brown hair fell partially on it.
“Now, will some one pray—mother, you?” and his eyes
turned imploringly towards the half crazed woman, who
essayed to pray for the departing spirit.
“That’ll do—that’ll do,” he exclaimed, interrupting her.
“It’s of no use spending your breath for me. It’s too late—too
late—so the hag says, and she’s coming again, with
myriads on myriads of fiends; but they can’t hurt me as
long as this is here,” and his hand clutched convulsively for
the book which lay beside him.
“The hymn book—the hymn book—bring that too,” he
gasped, while a cold perspiration stood thickly upon his
forehead.
It was brought and placed on the opposite side of his
head.
“’Twon’t do—’twon’t do,” he sobbed. “All the hymns
Dr. Watts ever wrote can’t help me, for they come nearer
and nearer, as wolves hover round their prey. Is there
no help, no escape?” he cried, with the energy of despair;
adding, as a sudden look of joy lit up his ghastly features,
210“Yes—the Bible! Strange I have not thought of that
before. The Bible will keep them at bay. Bring it, Anna,
quick, for they are almost here.”
She obeyed; and grasping the word of God eagerly in
his hands, he laughed aloud, saying, “Now, do your worst,
ye fiends incarnate. The Bible will save me.”
There was a moment of perfect silence; and then, with a
groan so full of anguish that I involuntarily stopped my ears
to shut out the fearful sound, the Bible was loosed from the
clammy hands, which for a brief instant fought fiercely in
the empty air, and then dropped lifeless at his side.
Herbert was dead!
At the foot of the garden, near the long avenue where
the shadow of the maple trees would fall upon his grave,
and the moan of the lake be always heard, we buried him;
and then, the broken-hearted Anna, widowed thus early,
went back to her accustomed duties, performing each one
quietly and gently, but without a smile upon her white,
stony face, or a tear in her large mournful blue eyes. Aunt
Charlotte, too, utterly crushed and wretched, went back to
her city home, having first won a promise from Anna that
in the autumn she would follow her. And then we were
left alone with our great sorrow, wholly dependent, as it
were, upon Mr. Watson, for support and counsel.
There had always been about him a mystery I could not
fathom, and greatly was I surprised when one evening, a week
after Herbert’s death, he asked me to go with him to his
room, as there was something he wished to tell me. I complied
with his request, and was soon seated in the large
willow chair near the table on which lay many works of our
best authors, for he possessed a taste for literature, and devoted
all his leisure moments to study. Drawing a seat to my
211side, he said, taking my hand in his, “Rosa, what do you
think I am going to tell you?”
I tried to wrest my hand from his grasp, for the unwonted
liberty angered me. But he held it fast, smiling at my
fruitless endeavors, and after a moment continued: “Why
do you try to remove your hand from mine? I have held it
many a time, and I have a right so to do—a cousin’s right.
Look at me, Rosa, don’t you know me?”
Involuntarily I started to my feet, gazing earnestly upon
him, then with a cry of joy I threw my arms around his
neck, exclaiming, “Cousin Will! Cousin Will!”
It was indeed he, come back to us when we had thought
of him as dead. A few words will suffice to tell his story.
Perfectly disgusted with sea life, he had deserted at Calcutta,
where he kept himself secreted until the vessel sailed.
But it was not his wish to remain there long, and the first
time an English ship was in port he offered to work his passage
to Liverpool. The offer was accepted, and while we
were mourning over his supposed death he was threading
the smoky streets of London, doing sometimes one thing
and sometimes another, but always earning an honest livelihood.
“Never, for a moment,” said he, “did I forget your
family, but I have fancied they were glad to be rid of me,
and hence my silence. When at last I returned again to
New York, I went one day to a reading-room, where I
accidentally came across Mr. Langley’s advertisement, and
something prompted me to answer it in person. If I had
ever heard of him before, I had forgotten it; consequently I
neither recognized him nor his wife, who has changed much
since I saw her; but when I accidently heard them speak
of “Rosa,” and “Meadow Brook,” my curiosity was roused,
and I became aware of the relationship existing between
212us. Why I have kept it a secret so long I can hardly tell,
except that there was about it, to me, a kind of pleasing
excitement, and then, too, I fancied that Mr. Langley would
not so well bear restraint and direction from me if he supposed
me an interested party; but he has gone, and concealment
on that score is no longer necessary. I have told
you my story, Rosa, and now it is for you to say whether
I am again received and loved as the “Cousin Will” of
olden time.”
He was a big, tall man, six feet two inches high, while I
was a young girl scarcely yet seventeen; but notwithstanding
all this, I threw my arms around his sun-burnt neck
and kissed his sun-burnt cheek as I had often done before.
This was my answer, and with it he was satisfied.
After leaving his room I went directly to my sister, to
whom I repeated the strange story I had heard. She was
pleased and gratified, but her faculties were too much benumbed
for her to manifest any particular emotion, though
as time wore on I could see how much she leaned upon him
and confided in his judgment. It seemed necessary for her
to remain in Rockland through the summer, and as she
would not consent to my leaving her, I was rather compelled
to stay; although almost weekly there came to us
letters from home urging our return, and at last, near the
middle of September, we one day received a letter from
Charlie, which, owing to some delay, had been on the
road two whole weeks. In it he wrote that our father had
failed rapidly within a few days and we must come quickly if
we would again see him alive, adding that he talked almost
constantly of Rose, asking if they thought she would come.
Oh, how vividly I recalled the past, remembering with
anguish the harsh words I had uttered when last I saw him.
It was true I had once written, imploring pardon for my fault,
213and Lizzie, who answered my letter, had said “Father bade
me say that you were freely forgiven;” but still I felt that I
could not let him die until I had heard my forgiveness from
his own lips. It was impossible for Anna to accompany me,
and, as William would not leave her, I started alone, my
heart filled with many dark forebodings, lest I should be too
late.
CHAPTER XIX. THE DEATH OF THE RIGHTEOUS.
214
All around the house was still; while within, the children
and the neighbors trod softly as they went from room to
room, and their faces wore an anxious, troubled look, as
if they already felt the presence of the shadow hovering
near. The heavy brass knocker was muffled, and the deep-toned
churchbell across the way no longer told the hours of 12
and 9, for at each stroke the sick man had turned upon his
pillow, and moaned as if in pain. So when the Sabbath
came the people went up unsummoned to the house of God,
where they reverently prayed for him, who was passing
from their midst, and who, ere another week rolled round,
would be “where congregations ne’er break up, and Sabbaths
never end.”
For many days he had lain in a kind of stupor from which
nothing roused him save the rush of the engine as it swept
across the meadow at the foot of the hill. Then he would
start up, asking eagerly if “they had come, Anna, Rose,
and Jamie.” Much he talked of the absent ones, and as
day by day went by and still they came not, he wept like a
little child, as he said to his wife, “I shall never see them
more.”
“And if you do not,” she asked, “what shall I tell
them?”
215For a time he lay as if her question was unheard—then
opening his eyes he answered, “Tell Anna, my stricken one,
that there is for her a balm in Gilead; that whom the
Lord loveth he chasteneth, and though the waters through
which she is passing be deep and troubled, they shall not
overflow, for the everlasting arms are beneath her.”
“And Rosa, have you no message for her?” asked my
mother as he ceased speaking.
“Oh, Rosa, Rosa,” he answered quickly, “Tell her—tell
her everything—but not here—not in this room. She thinks
I do not love her, and when she comes and finds me gone,
go with her to my grave. She will believe you if you tell
her there how dear she was to me, and how, through the
long weary nights before I died, I wept and prayed for her
that she might one day meet me in the better land. I
never meant to love one child more than another, but if I
did—tell her she was my pride, the one on whom I doted.
She thought me cold and unfeeling, because I stayed not to
bid her adieu that morning. Ah, she did not know that
with the first dawn of day I stole up to her chamber to
look on her once more for the last, last time. There were
tears on her cheek, I kissed them away; tell her that, and
perchance her heart will soften towards her poor old
father.”
From that time he sank rapidly, and one bright September
day, near the hour of sunset, it was told in Meadow
Brook that he was dying. On such occasions, in a small
country village, the liveliest sympathy is felt; and now
those who knew and loved him spoke to each other softly
and low, while even the little children ceased their noisy
play upon the common, and with a timid, curious glance
towards the open windows of the sick room, hastened home,
where they kept closely at their mother’s side, wondering—asking
216of her what death was, and if she were sure that he,
the dying one, would go to Heaven.
Meantime, the sun was almost set, and as its last golden
rays fell upon the face of the sufferer, a radiant smile lit up
his features, and he exclaimed aloud, “’Tis the glorious light
of the Eternal shining down upon me. Do not weep,
mother. We shall not be parted long,” he continued, as he
felt upon his forehead a tear from the grey-haired, wrinkled
woman, on whose bosom his head was pillowed, just as it
had been, long, long ago, when first a tender babe he lay in
that mother’s arms. To her it seemed not long, and yet
it was fifty years since he was lent to her, and now, when
God would have his own again, she said submissively, “Thy
will be done.” Once before had a great sorrow fallen upon
her, leaving her henceforth to walk alone, and then her soul
had well-nigh fainted beneath the blow, for she was younger
far by many years. But now she was old, and already she
heard the roar of the deep dark river on whose very banks
she stood, and down whose swift current her first born was
floating; so she stifled her own grief, for, as he had said, she
knew it would not be long ere they met again.
“Where is Fanny?” he asked, and his arms closed fondly
around his wife.
It mattered not that time and care had dimmed the lustre
of her eye, and robbed her cheek of its girlish bloom; to
him she was beautiful still, for through weal and woe she
had been faithful to her marriage vow, and now the bitterest
pang of all was the leaving her alone.
“The God of the widow and the fatherless watch over
and keep you all so that at the last, when I ask for my
children, there shall not one be missing,” he said, as his arms
unclosed, and then, with a low, wailing moan, the mother
bent over the white face of her son, so that the wife might
217not see the fearful change which had come upon it, for my
father was dead!
You who have kept with me while I described the death
scene of the unfortunate Herbert, and of my sainted father,
can you not—do you not say, “Let me die the death of the
righteous, and let my last end be like his?”
Lonely and desolate was the home at which I arrived one
day too late, for they had buried him, and there was naught
left to me of my father save the lock of hair which they
severed from his head as he lay in the coffin. Yes, he was
gone; but so long as life and being endure, so long shall fond
remembrances of him linger in my memory, and if at the
last I meet him in the better world, will it not be in a
measure the blessed influence of his dying message, which
has led the wanderer there?
CHAPTER XX. GOING SOUTH.
218
After the first shock of our sorrow was over, the question
arose as to what we were to do in future for our support.
Grandma was already old, while mother was not so young
as she had been once, and neither could do much towards
their own maintenance, which necessarily would devolve
upon us their children. It had ever been a pet project of
mine to go South as a teacher, and when one day in looking
over a Boston paper I accidentally came across the advertisement
of a Georgia lady, Mrs. A. D. Lansing, who wished
for a private governess, I resolved at once to apply for the
situation, greatly fearing lest I might be too late.
I was not, however; for after waiting impatiently for a
few weeks, I received a letter from the lady herself, who,
after enumerating the duties I was expected to perform and
the branches I was to teach, added, in a P. S.: “Before
making any definite arrangements with Miss Lee, Mrs. Lansing
wishes to be informed if, either by her friends or herself,
she is considered pretty, as a person of decidedly ordinary
looks will be preferred.”
“Spiteful, jealous old thing!” exclaimed Lizzie, who was
looking over my shoulder, “I wouldn’t stir a step.”
But I thought differently. My curiosity was roused to
219know the cause of her strange freak; and then, too, six
hundred dollars per year would amply atone for any little
peculiarities in my employer. So I answered her letter
forthwith, assuring her that neither my friends nor myself
had ever been guilty of calling me pretty—in short, I was
decidedly homely, and trusted that on that point at least I
should please her.
“What a fib, Rosa,” said Charlie, when I told him what
I had written. “You know you are not homely. You used
to be, I’ll admit; but you are far from being so now. To be
sure, you are not what many would call handsome, but you
are decidedly good-looking. You’ve got handsome eyes,
splendid hair (and he pulled one of my short, thick curls by
way of adding emphasis to his words) and your complexion
is not one half so sallow and muddy as it used to be.
Depend upon it, this ‘Mrs. Angeline Delafield Lansing, of
Cedar Grove’ will think you have deceived her.”
“Nonsense!” I replied, seating myself at the piano, which
was now my constant companion, Mrs. Lansing having
written that she was very particular about music.
Now, to tell the truth, I was not very much of a performer,
but looking upon the South very much as I did
upon the far West, I fancied that a small amount of showy
accomplishments would pass for the real coin. Still I determined
to play as well as possible, and so week after week I
practised, until, when I had nearly given up all hopes of
ever hearing from the lady again, I one day received a letter
bearing the W—— post-mark, and containing a check on a
Boston bank for money sufficient to defray my expenses.
There were also a few hastily written lines, saying that
“Mrs. Lansing considered our engagement as settled, but
she should not expect me until the latter part of April, as
she could not immediately get rid of her present governess,
220a painted, insipid creature from New York, and the veriest
humbug in the world.”
“A sweet time you’ll have of it with madam,” said
Charlie, “and once for all I advise you to give up going.
Why, only think, April there is hotter than pepper, and of
course you’ll take the fever and die.”
But I was not to be persuaded. The “sunny South” had
for me a peculiar fascination; and then, too, there was
another reason which, more than all others, prompted me to
go. Georgia was the home of the dark man, as I called
him, and though there was hardly a probability of my ever
meeting him there, such a thing was still possible, and like
Longfellow’s Evangeline, who, on the broad Mississippi, felt
that each dip of the oar carried her nearer to her lost
Gabriel, so each day I felt a stronger and stronger conviction
that somewhere in the southern land I should find him.
In the meantime, Anna had been with us for a few
weeks, but greatly changed from the Anna of former times.
Listlessly she moved from room to room—never smiling,
never weeping, and seldom speaking unless she were first
addressed. To her, everything was dark, deep night, and
such a gloom did her presence cast over us all, that though
we would gladly have kept her with us, we still felt relieved
when she left us for a home in Boston, where little Jamie
soon became the idol of his grandmother, whose subdued
cheerfulness had ere long a visible effect upon Anna. Cousin
Will, too, had visited us, and after spending a short time
had sailed with brother John for California, promising himself
a joyous future, when he should return with money sufficient
to purchase the old homestead, which he said should
be mother’s as long as she lived.
It was a cold, dark, snowy morning in the latter part of
April, when I at last started on my journey. The surface
221of the ground was frozen hard, the trees were leafless and
bare, while but few green things gave token that spring was
with us. It is not strange, then, that I almost fancied
myself in another world, when after a prosperous sea voyage
I one morning went on shore at Charleston, and first
breathed the soft, balmy air of the South. Dense and green
was the foliage of the trees, while thousands of roses and
flowering shrubs filled the air with a perfume almost sickening
to the senses. From Charleston to Augusta was a wearisome
ride, for the cars were crowded and dirty, and there
was to me nothing remarkably pleasing in the long stretches
of cypress swamps and pine barrens through which we
passed.
It was late in the evening when we reached the town of
C——, from whence I was to proceed to W——, by stage.
It was a most beautiful night; and for hours I watched
the soft moonlight as it glimmered among the trees which
lined either side of the narrow road, and whose branches
often swept against the windows of our lumbering vehicle.
It was long after sunrise when we arrived at W——, but
so thickly wooded is the country around, that I obtained
not a single glimpse of the town until I suddenly found
myself “thar,” as the driver said, dismounting and opening
the door of our prison-house. The hotel into which I was
ushered, would, perhaps, compare favorably with our country
taverns at the North; but at each step I took, I felt
a more and more painful consciousness that home, my home,
was far away.
After shaking the dust from my travelling dress, and
slaking my thirst from the big gourd shell (my special
delight), which hung by the side of a bucket of cool water
which stood on a little stand in the parlor, I inquired for
some one who would take to Mrs. Lansing my card, and
222thus apprise her of my arrival. The landlord immediately
summoned a bright, handsome mulatto boy, who, after
receiving my orders, and favoring me with a sight of his
ivories, started off bare-headed, and for that matter bare-bodied
too, for Cedar Grove, which the landlord pointed
out to me in the distance, and which, with its dense surroundings
of trees, looked to me delightfully cool and pleasant.
After waiting rather impatiently for an hour or more,
a large, old-fashioned carriage, drawn by two rather poor-looking
horses, stopped before the door. It belonged to
Mrs. Lansing; and the footman, jumping down from the
rack behind, handed me a note, in which the lady begged
me to come directly to her house, saying she was herself
indisposed, or she would have come down to meet me, and
also adding, that if I would excuse her she would rather
not see me until supper-time, when she hoped to feel
better.
At the extremity of Main street, we turned in at a ponderous
gate, and after passing through two or three fields
or lawns, stopped at last in front of Cedar Grove, which
stood upon a slight eminence overlooking the town. In
perfect delight I gazed around me, for it seemed the
embodiment of my childish dreams, and involuntarily I
exclaimed, “This is indeed the sunny, sunny South.” It
was very beautiful, that spacious yard and garden, with
their winding walks on which no ray of sunlight fell, so
securely were they shaded, by the cedar and the fir, the
catalpa, the magnolia, and the fig tree, most of them seen
now by me for the first time in all their natural beauty,
reminded one so forcibly of Eden. The house itself was
a large, square building, surrounded on three sides by a
piazza, which I afterwards found was the family sitting-room;
it being there that they congregated both morning
223and evening. The building had once been white, but the
paint was nearly all worn off, and it now presented a rather
dilapidated appearance, with its broken shutters and decayed
pillars, round which vines and ivy were twining. The floors
within were bare, but scrupulously clean; while the rooms
lacked the costly furniture I had confidently expected to
see.
Scarcely was I seated in the parlor, when I heard a sweet,
childish voice exclaim, “She’s in thar—she is,” while at the
same time a pair of soft, blue eyes looked through the
crevice of the door, and then were quickly withdrawn, their
owner laughing aloud as if she had accomplished some
daring feat, and calling out, “I seen her, Hal—I did. And
she don’t look cross neither. You dassn’t peek in thar,
dast you?”
They were my future pupils, I was sure; and already my
heart warmed towards them, particularly her with the
silvery voice, and I was just thinking of going out to find
them, when I heard a light footstep on the stairs, and the
next moment a tall, dark-eyed girl, apparently fourteen or
fifteen years of age, entered the room, introducing herself
as Miss Lina Lansing, and welcoming me so cordially that
I felt myself at once at home.
“Mother,” said she, “is indisposed, as I believe she wrote
you, and has sent me to receive you, and ask what you
would like.”
I had scarcely slept a moment the night previous, so I
replied, that if convenient, I would go immediately to my
room. Ringing the bell, she summoned to the room a short,
dumpy mulatto, whom she called Cressy, and who, she said,
was to be my attendant. Following her up the stairs, I was
ushered into a large, airy chamber, which, though not
furnished with elegance, still contained everything for my
224comfort, even to a huge feather bed, the sight of which made
me wipe the perspiration from my face.
“Shall I wash missus’ feet first, or comb her har,” asked
the negress, pouring a pitcher of water into a small bathing
tub.
This was entirely new to me, who had always been accustomed
to wait upon myself, so I declined her offers of assistance,
telling her, “I preferred being alone, and could do
everything for myself which was necessary.”
“Laws, missus!” she answered, rolling the whites of her
eyes, “’taint no ways likely you can bresh and ’range all
dat ar har,” pointing to my thick and now somewhat
tangled curls. “Why, Miss Lina’s straighter dan a string,
an’ I’ll be boun’ she never yet tache a comb to it herself.”
With some difficulty I convinced the African that her
services were not needed, and staring at me as if I had
been a kind of monstrosity, she left the room, the door of
which I bolted against any new intruder. The windows
of my chamber looked out upon the garden, where now
were blossoming roses and flowers of every possible hue
and form. A little to the right, and about a quarter of a
mile away was, another building, larger and more imposing
than that of Mrs. Lansing, while a great deal of taste seemed
to be displayed in the arrangement of the grounds. As
nearly as I could judge, it stood upon a little hill, for the
trees appeared to rise regularly one above the other, the
fir and the cedar forming the outer boundary; while, as I
afterwards learned, the inner rows consisted of the graceful
magnolia, the wide-spreading catalpa, the beautiful china
tree, and the persimmon, whose leaves in the autumn wear
a most brilliant hue, and present so fine a contrast to the
dark green of the pine and the fir. Very, very pleasant
it looked to me, with its white walls just discernible amid
225the dense foliage which surrounded it, and for a long time
I stood gazing towards it wondering whose home it was,
and if the inmates were as happy as it seemed they might
be.
At last, faint with the fatigue of my journey and the odor
of the flowers, which, from the garden below, came in at the
open window, I threw myself upon the lounge (feather bed
looking altogether too formidable) and was soon fast asleep,
dreaming of Meadow Brook, of the white house on the hill,
and of the dark man, who, I thought, told me that it should
one day be my home. When at last I awoke, the sun was
no longer shining in at my windows, for it was late in the
afternoon, and the fiercest heat of the day was past.
Springing up, I commenced dressing with some trepidation,
for I expected to meet the mistress of the house at supper-time.
My toilet was nearly completed when I heard in the
hall the patter of childish feet, while a round, bright eye
was applied to the key-hole. It was the same which had
looked at me in the parlor, and anxious to see its owner, I
stepped out of the door just as a fairy creature with golden
curls started to run away. I was too quick for her, however,
and catching her in my arms, I pushed back the clustering
ringlets from her brow, and gazing into her sunny
face, asked her name.
Raising her white, waxen hand, she did for me the office
I had done for her, viz. pushed back my curls, and looking
in my face, answered, “Ma says it’s Jessica, but Lina, Hal,
and Uncle Dick call me Jessie, and I like that a heap the
best. You are our new governess, ain’t you?”
She was singularly beautiful, and yet it was not so much
the regularity of her features, nor the clearness of her complexion
which made her so. It was the light which shone in
her lustrous blue eyes, which gave her the expression of an angel,
226for such she was—an angel in her southern home, which,
without her would have been dark and cheerless. Her
brother, whom she called Hal, was three years older, and
not nearly so handsome. He was very dark, and it seemed
to me that I had seen a face like his before; but ere I
could remember where, a faint voice from the piazza, which
faced the east and was now quite cool, called out, “Halbert,
Halbert, come here.”
“That’s ma,” said Jessie, getting down from my arms.
“That’s ma—come and see her,” and following her, I soon
stood in the presence of Mrs. Lansing, who was reclining
rather indolently in a large willow chair, while at her back
was a negress half asleep, but appearing wide awake whenever
her mistress moved.
She was a chubby, rosy-cheeked woman, apparently thirty-five
years of age. Her eyes were very black, and she had a
habit of frequently shutting them, so as to show off the long,
fringed eyelashes. On the whole, I thought, she was quite
prepossessing in her appearance, an opinion, however, which
I changed ere long; for by the time I reached her, there
was a dark cloud on her brow, evidently of displeasure or of
disappointment. Still she was very polite, offering me her
jewelled hand, and saying, “Miss Lee, I suppose. You are
welcome to Georgia then;” after an instant, she added,
“You don’t look at all like I thought you would.”
I was uglier than she expected, I presumed, and the tears
started to my eyes as I replied, “I wrote to you that I was
very plain, but after a little I shall look better; I am tired
now with travelling.”
A strange, peculiar smile flitted over her face, while she
intently regarded me as if to assure herself of my sanity. I
was puzzled, and in my perplexity I said something about
returning home, if my looks were so disagreeable. “They
227were used to me there, and didn’t mind it,” I said; at the
same time leaning my head against the vine-wreathed pillars,
I sobbed aloud. Lithe as a kitten, little Jessie sprang
up behind me, and winding her arms around my neck, asked
why I cried.
“Did ma make you cry?” she said. “Uncle Dick says
she makes all the governesses cry.”
“Jessica, Jessica, get down this moment,” said the lady.
“I did not intend to hurt Miss Lee’s feelings, and do not
understand how I could have done so. She is either acting
a part, or else she strangely misunderstands me.”
I never acted a part in my life, and, somewhat indignant,
I wiped away my tears and asked “what she meant.”
There was the same smile on her face which I had noticed
before, as she said, “Do you really think yourself ugly?”
Of course I did. I had never thought otherwise, for
hadn’t I been told so ever since I was a child no larger than
Jessie, and the impression thus early received had never
been eradicated. Thus I answered her, and she believed
me, for she replied, “You are mistaken, Miss Lee, for however
plain you might have been in childhood, you are not
so now. Neither do I understand how with those eyes, that
hair and brow, you can think yourself ugly. I do not believe
you meant to deceive me, but, to tell the truth, I am
disappointed; but that cannot now be helped, and we’ll
make the best of it.”
Perfectly astonished, I listened to her remarks, giving her
the credit of meaning what she said, and for the first time
in my life, I felt as I suppose folks must feel who think they
are handsome! After this little storm was over, she evidently
exerted herself to be agreeable for a few moments,
and then rather abruptly asked me how old I was.
“Not quite eighteen!” she repeated in some surprise.
228“Why I supposed you were twenty-five at least! Don’t you
think she looks older than Ada?” turning to Lina, who answered
quickly, “Oh, no, mother, nothing like as old. Why,
I shouldn’t think her over seventeen at the most.”
Now among my other misfortunes I numbered that of
“looking old as the hills,” so I didn’t care particularly for
what they said, though it struck me as rather singular that
Mrs. Lansing should thus discuss me in my presence; but
this thought was lost in the more absorbing one as to
who the Ada could be of whom she had spoken. Possibly
it was Ada Montrose, though I ardently hoped
to the contrary, for well I knew there was no happiness
for me where she was. Thinking it would be on a
par with the questions put to me, I was on the point of asking
who Ada was, when we were summoned to supper, which
consisted mostly of broiled chickens, strong coffee, iced milk,
egg bread, and hoecakes, if I except the row of sables who
grouped themselves around the table, and the feather girl,
whose efforts to keep awake amused me so much that I almost
forgot to eat. We were nearly through when a handsome
mulatto boy entered and handed a letter to his mistress,
which she immediately opened, holding it so that the
address could be read by Halbert, who, after spelling it
out, exclaimed, “That’s from Uncle Dick, I know!”
“Is he coming home?” asked Jessie, dropping her knife
and fork, while even Lina, who seldom evinced much
interest in anything, roused up and repeated the question
which Jessie had asked.
“Yes. He is in New York now,” said Mrs. Lansing;
“and will be here in a week.”
“Good!” exclaimed Halbert.
“Oh, I’m right glad,” said Jessie, while Lina asked if
Ada was with him.
229“No,” returned Mrs. Lansing. “She is still in Paris
with her cousin, and will not return until autumn.”
“I’m glad of that,” said Lina, to which Hal rejoined,
“And so am I. She’s so proud and stuck up, I can’t bear
her.”
“Children, children,” spoke Mrs. Lansing, rather sternly,
at the same time rising from the table.
It was not yet sunset; and as soon as we were again
assembled upon the piazza, Halbert and Jessie, who were
never still, asked permission to “run up to Uncle Dick’s,
and tell the servants he was coming home.”
Mrs. Lansing made no objection; and then they proposed
that I should accompany them. Feeling that a walk would
do me good, I turned towards Mrs. Lansing, for her consent.
It was given, of course; but had I known her better I
should have detected a shade of displeasure on her face.
“You had better go too,” said she to Lina; but Lina was
too listless and indolent, and so we went without her, little
Jessie holding my hand, and jumping instead of walking.
“Eva’s mighty lazy,” said she, at last; “don’t you
think so!”
“Who’s lazy?” I asked; and she replied—
“’Thar, I done forgot again, and called her Eva. Her
name is Evangeline, and we used to call her Eva, until
mother read a bad book that had little Eva in it, and then
she called her Lina.”
“’Twan’t a bad book, neither,” exclaimed Halbert, stopping
suddenly; “Uncle Dick said ’twan’t; but it made
mother mad, I tell you, and now when she gets rarin’ he
calls her Mrs. St. Clare.”
I needed no one to tell me that it was “Uncle Tom,” to
which he referred, but I said nothing except to chide the
children for their negro language.
230“I know we talk awful,” said Jessie, brushing her curls
from her eyes. “Uncle Dick says we do, but I mean to
learn better. I don’t talk half like I used to.”
I could not help smiling in spite of myself upon the little
creature bounding and frisking at my side. Uncle Dick
seemed to be her oracle, and after looking around to make
sure that no one heard me, I asked “who he was?”
“Why, he’s Uncle Dick,” said she; “the bestest uncle
in the world;” while Halbert added, “He’s got a heap
of money, too; and once, when ma thought I was asleep, I
heard her tell Lina, that if he didn’t get married it would
be divided between us, and I should have the most, ’cause
I’m named after him, Richard Halbert Delafield Lansing,
and they call me Hal, for short. I told Uncle Dick what
mother said, and I tell you, he looked blacker’n a nigger;
and somehow, after that he took to ridin’ and foolin’ with
Ada, wonderfully.”
As yet everything with me was comparatively conjecture.
I did not know positively that the Uncle Dick of the children
was the “dark man” of Rosa Lee; but the answer to
my next question would decide it, and half tremblingly was
it put. “Who is this Ada. What is her other name?”
“Ada Montrose, and she lives with us. Uncle Dick is
her guardian,” said Halbert, throwing a bit of dirt at the
negro boy who accompanied us, and who returned the
young gentleman’s salute with interest.
I was satisfied, and did not wish to hear any more. I
should meet him again, and tinged as my temperament is with
a love of the marvellous, I could not help believing that
Providence had led me there. By this time we had reached
“Sunny Bank,” as it was very appropriately called, and
never before had I seen so lovely a spot. The grounds,
which were very spacious, were surrounded on all sides by a
231hedge of the beautiful Cherokee rose, and, unlike those of
Cedar Grove, were laid out with perfect taste and order,
Mr. Delafield, as I afterwards learned, had spent much time
at the North, and in the arrangement of his house and
grounds, he had not only imitated, but far surpassed the
style of the country seats which are so often found within a
few miles of our eastern cities. For this he was in a
measure indebted to Dame Nature, who at the South scatters
her favors with a lavish hand, sometimes beautifying and
adorning objects far better than the utmost skill of man
could do. The gate at the entrance of Sunny Bank was a
huge wooden structure, having for its posts two immense
oak trees, around whose trunks the graceful ivy twined, and
then hung in fanciful festoons from several of the lower
branches.
As I had supposed, the house itself stood upon a slight
elevation, and the walk which led up to it was bordered on
either side by the mock orange, whose boughs, meeting overhead,
formed an effectual screen from the rays of the sun.
The building, though fashioned in the same style as that of
Mrs. Lansing, was much larger, and had about it a far more
stylish air. Much of the furniture had been brought from
New York, Halbert said; adding that “all the floors were
covered with matting in the summer, and elegant Turkey
carpets in the winter.”
In the rear of the house were the cabins of the negroes,
who were lounging idly about, some on the ground, some in
the doors, and some stretched at full length upon the back
of the piazza, evidently enjoying the cool evening breeze.
At sight of us, they roused up a little, and when Halbert,
after announcing that I was Miss Lee, the new governess,
further informed them that their master was coming home in
a few days, they instantly gathered round us, evincing so
232much joy as to astonish me, who had heretofore looked
upon a southern slaveholder as a tyrant greatly dreaded by
his vassals.
“You must like Mr. Delafield very much,” I ventured to
remark to one old lady, whose hair was white as wool.
“Like Mass’r Richard!” said she, rolling up her eyes.
“Lor’ bless you, miss, like don’t begin to ’spress it. Why,
I farly worships him; for didn’t I tend him when he was
a nussin’ baby? and hain’t these old arms toted him
more’n a million of miles?”
Here her voice was drowned by the others, all of whom
united in declaring him the “berry best mass’r in Georgy.”
This did not, of course, tend in any way to diminish the interest
which I felt in the stranger; and, ere I was aware of
it, I found myself anticipating his return almost as anxiously
as the negroes themselves.
It was dark when we reached Cedar Grove; and as there
was company in the parlor, I went immediately to my room.
I had not been there long, however, when a servant was sent
up, saying, that “Mrs. Lansing wished me to come down
and play.”
This was an ordeal which I greatly dreaded; for, from
what I had seen of Mrs. Lansing, I knew she would criticise
my performance closely; and fearing inability to acquit myself
at all creditably, I trembled violently as I descended to
the parlor, which was nearly full of visitors.
“Miss Lee, ladies,” said Mrs. Lansing, at the same time
motioning towards the music-stool as the seat I was expected
to occupy.
There was a film before my eyes as I took my post and
nervously turned over the leaves of a music-book; which,
by the way, was wrong side up, though I didn’t know it
then! I have heard much of stage fright, and sure am I.
233that never did poor mortal suffer more from an attack of
that nature than did I during the few moments that I sat
there, trying to recall something familiar, something which
I knew I could play. At last, when the patience of the
company seemed nearly exhausted, I dashed off at random,
playing parts of two or three different tunes, changing the
key as many times, using the load pedal when I should have
used the soft, and at last ending with the most horrid discord
to which my ears ever listened. The audience were,
undoubtedly, thunderstruck, for they spoke not for the space
of a minute; and, with a feeling of desperation, I was about
to make a second effort, hoping thereby to retrieve my character,
when Mrs. Lansing said, in a cold, sarcastic voice,
“That will do, Miss Lee; we are perfectly satisfied.” Then,
turning to a haughty-looking young lady who sat by the
window, she continued: “Come, Miss Porter; you certainly
can’t refuse to favor us, now.”
With a very consequential air, for which I could not
blame her, Miss Porter took my place, and, without any apparent
effort, killed my poor performance outright; for she
executed admirably some of the most difficult music. When
she had finished, the ladies rose to go, Mrs. Lansing following
them to the door, and whispering (I know she did)
something about “her being humbugged again.”
When she returned to the room, I stole a glance at
her face, which was very red, and indicative of anything
but good will towards me. I felt the hot tears rising,
but when, with a bang, she closed the piano, and turning
towards me, demanded “how long I had taken music lessons,”
I forced them back, and answered promptly, “five
quarters.”
“Only five quarters!” she repeated, in evident amazement.
“Why, Lina has taken three years, and she wouldn’t
234consider herself competent to teach, even were she poor, and
obliged to do so.”
The latter part of this speech I did not fancy; for even
if a person is poor, and obliged to work, they do not often
like to be taunted with it; at least, I didn’t, but I couldn’t
help myself. I was at the mercy of Mrs. Lansing, who proceeded
to say, that “she had often been deceived by Northern
teachers, who thought to palm themselves off for better
scholars than they really were; and now she had almost
come to the conclusion that they were not so well educated
as the majority of Southern girls.”
“I, at least, never intended to deceive you,” said I; “I
told you in my letter that I was not an accomplished musician,
and still you consented to employ me.”
Here I broke down entirely, and wept passionately, telling
her, in broken sentences, that “however mortifying it would
be, I was willing to go back, if she wished it.”
At this point, little Jessie, who all the time had been present,
came to my side, and winding her arms around my
neck, said, “You sha’n’t go home. We like you, Hal and
me, and you sha’n’t go—shall she, Hal?”
Thus appealed to, Hal took up my cause, which he
warmly defended; telling his mother “she made every governess
cry, and told them they didn’t know anything, when
they did, for Uncle Dick said so, and he knew; and that, as
for music, Miss Lee played a heap better than Lina, because
she played something new—something he never heard before.”
“Nor any one else,” muttered Mrs. Lansing, while Hal
continued, “Uncle Dick says, the best teachers sometimes
don’t play at all, and Miss Lee sha’n’t go home.”
Very faintly, I repeated my willingness to do so, if Mrs.
Lansing thought best; to which she replied, “I will deal
235fairly with you, Miss Lee. I am disappointed in your musical
abilities, and if I find that your are deficient in other
things, I shall be obliged to dismiss you; but for a few
days I will keep you on trial.”
“Uncle Dick won’t let you send her away, I know,” said
Hal; and this, I am inclined to think, determined her upon
getting rid of me before his return.
Still, I was ostensibly upon trial, and whoever has been
in a similar situation, will readily understand that I could
not, of course, do myself justice. With Mrs. Lansing’s prying
eyes continually upon me, I really acted as though I
were half-witted; and by the close of the second day, I myself
began to doubt the soundness of my mind, wondering
why the folks at home had never discovered my stupidity.
Continual excitement kept my cheeks in a constant glow,
while the remainder of my face was quite pale, and several
times, in their mother’s presence, the children told me “how
handsome I was!” This annoyed her—and on the morning
of the third day, she informed me that she would defray my
expenses back to Massachusetts, where I could tell them I
was too young to suit her; adding, that I might as well go
the next morning. This was a death-blow to my hopes;
and so violent was the shock, that I could not even weep.
Hal and Jessie were furious, declaring I should not go; and
when I convinced them that I must, they insisted upon my
teaching that day, at all events.
To this I consented; and as Mrs. Lansing had now no
object in watching me, she absented herself from the schoolroom
entirely, leaving me to do as I pleased. The consequence
was, that my benumbed faculties awoke again to life,
everything which, for the last ten days, I seemed to have
forgotten, came back to me; while even the children noticed
how differently I appeared.
CHAPTER XXI. UNCLE DICK.
236
The day was drawing to a close. The children’s lessons
were over, the last I was to hear. Their books were piled
away awaiting the arrival of my successor, and at my request
I was left in the schoolroom alone—alone with my
grief, which was indeed bitter and hard to bear, for I knew
that injustice had been done me, and most keenly I felt the
mortification of returning home in disgrace. Very beautiful
to me seemed that fair south land of which I had dreamed
so oft, and I felt that I could not leave it.
Through the open window I heard the shouts of the children,
but I did not heed them, nor observe that throughout
the entire house there seemed to be an unusual commotion.
An hour went by, and then in the hall I heard the voice of
Jessie, and the words she uttered sent an electric thrill
through my nerves, and brought me to my feet, for they
were, “Come this way, Uncle Dick. I reckon she’s in the
schoolroom.”
The next moment he stood before me, the dark man, scanning
me curiously, but still without anything like rudeness in
his gaze.
“Uncle Dick’s come. This is him,” said Jessie, leading
him towards the spot where I stood.
A bright beautiful smile broke over his strongly marked
237features, and I felt as if a gleam of sunlight had shone for
an instant over my pathway. Taking my hand in his, he
bade Jessie leave us, as he wished to see me alone. She
started to obey, but ere she reached the door, she turned
back and asking him to stoop down, whispered in his ear,
loudly enough for me to hear, “I want you to like her.”
“Of course I shall,” he replied, and again that smile broke
over his face.
I did not expect him to recognize me, for with the exception
of the night at the theatre he had never fairly seen my
features, and still I was conscious of a feeling of disappointment
when I saw that he evidently had no suspicion of ever
having met me before. When I spoke, however, and he
heard the sound my voice, he started and looked me more
fully in the face; but whatever his thoughts might have
been, he seemed to be satisfied that he was mistaken, and
seating himself at my side, he commenced conversing with
me as familiarly as if he had known me all my life. Gradually
our conversation turned upon books, and ere I was
aware of it I passed through what I now know to have
been a pretty thorough examination of all the branches
which Mrs. Lansing had wished me to teach, but so adroitly
was the whole thing managed that it seemed like a quiet,
pleasant talk, though I did wonder at his asking so many
questions. French, was the last subject discussed, and here
I was at fault, for my pronunciation I well knew was bad,
although Mr. Delafield, who was himself a fine French
scholar, told me it was quite as good as the majority of the
Americans who had neither lived in Paris, nor had the advantage
of a native teacher.
“You play, I believe. I would like to hear you,” he said
at last, laying his hand on my shoulder, as if he would lead
me to the parlor.
238Instantly the blood rushed to my face, for since the night
of my disgrace I had not touched the piano, neither did I
wish to again. So I tried to excuse myself, and when he
insisted, I finally said, with my eyes full of tears, “Please
excuse me, sir, for I can’t play. I failed before your sister,
and I shall do the same before you.”
“No you won’t,” he replied, at the same time drawing my
arm within his and leading me towards the door. “You
have nothing to fear, Miss Lee, and if you acquit yourself half
as creditably here as you have elsewhere, I shall be satisfied.”
A faint perception of the truth began to dawn upon me,
and I looked up at him so earnestly that he stopped and
smiling down upon me, said, “You have taught a district
school in New England, I believe?”
“Yes, sir,” I answered.
“And you were examined, of course?”
“Yes, sir, and got a certificate, too,” I said eagerly.
“I presume you did,” he continued, “and if necessary I
can give you another, for I have been doing nothing more or
less than trying to find out how much you know. As I have
before hinted, I am perfectly satisfied, and unless you leave
from choice, you will remain at Cedar Grove.”
He spoke as one having full authority to do as he pleased,
and I instinctively felt that though nominally Mrs. Lansing
was mistress there, he, in reality, was the leader, the head,
whose bidding every one obeyed. The change from utter
despondency to almost perfect happiness, was too great, and
withdrawing my hand from his arm, I sat down upon the
stairs and cried like a child, while he stood, looking down
upon me and thinking, I dare say, that I was a very foolish
girl. At last, when I thought his patience was nearly exhausted,
I wiped my eyes, and starting up, said, “You have
made me very happy, Mr. Delafield, for I could not have
239borne the disgrace as being sent home as incompetent. I
can play for you now, or for Mrs. Lansing either.”
And the result proved that I was right, for I exceeded my
own expectations, and was astonished at myself.
“Angeline,” said he, in a slightly commanding voice, as
that lady looked curiously in at the door, “Angeline, come
here;” and she crossed over to his side, where he detained
her by placing his arm around her waist.
For a moment then I wavered, for though I could not see,
I could feel the haughty gaze of the large black eyes, which
I knew were bent upon me.
“You have done well, Miss Lee,” he said, when at last I
arose from the instrument, at the same time playfully touching
my cheeks, which were burning with feverish excitement.
That night, after I had retired to my room, Halbert and
Jessie came to the door, requesting permission to come in.
I admitted them, when Jessie, jumping into my lap, said,
“Oh, I’m so glad you are going to stay. Hal says so.”
“Yes,” put in Hal, “Uncle Dick told me that you
mustn’t be sent away, for you were a heap better scholar
than she had represented you to be.”
“Perhaps it will not be as Mr. Delafield says,” I remarked;
and Hal quickly rejoined, “Yes it will; ma does
just what he tells her to do; and then, too, he pays the
governess, for I heard him say so, and he told her if you
were dismissed ’twas the last one he’d hire. And he said
she must treat you better than she did Miss Rawson, for you
were very young, and little things hurt your feelings, and
when Ada came home, she mustn’t domineer over you, for
he wouldn’t allow it. Oh, I like Uncle Dick. Don’t you?”
The moonlight was streaming across the floor, but it did
not reveal the blush which deepened on my cheek as I
240faintly answered “Yes,” bidding him at the same time not
to tell of it, for I began to feel afraid of the boy’s loquacity.
That night I dreamed of “Uncle Dick,” whose name was the
last which sounded in my ears when I fell asleep, and the
first of which I thought when I awoke in the morning. As
I was dressing, I heard little Jessie on the piazza, singing in
her childish way, “I love Uncle Dick, I do, and so does Hal,
and so does Mis-ses Lee!”
“Who told you that, Pussy?” asked a voice which I
recognized as Mr. Delafield’s, and very nervously I listened
for Jessie’s answer, which was, “Oh, I know she does. Hal
asked her didn’t she like you, and she said she did.”
“Rather early to avow a preference, I think. I shouldn’t
wonder if a Miss Rawson performance were to be enacted a
second time,” said another voice, which I knew to be that
of Mrs. Lansing, who had joined her brother upon the
piazza.
“Angeline,” said Mr. Delafield, somewhat sternly, “don’t
be foolish. If Halbert asked Miss Lee if she liked me,
wasn’t it the most natural thing in the world for her to say
‘Yes.’ I do wish you’d rid yourself of the impression that
every girl who looks at me is in love with me, or that I am
in love with every lady to whom I choose to be polite.”
“Do you think Miss Lee pretty?” asked Mrs. Lansing,
without paying any attention to his last remark.
Up to this point I could not well help overhearing their
conversation, for I was arranging my hair before the mirror
which stood near the window; but now there was no longer
any necessity for my remaining there, and I resolutely
walked away, though I would have given much to have
heard his answer. He had gone home when I went down to
the breakfast-room, where I found Mrs. Lansing, who
greeted me rather coldly, and appeared slightly embarrassed.
241I had purposely donned my travelling dress, for though Mr.
Delafield had said I was to stay, I felt that she too must do
the same ere I had a right to remain. The sight of my
dress seemed to annoy her, for it brought to her cheeks two
bright red spots which grew deeper all the while we were at
breakfast. When it was over, and the children had gone
out, I very composedly asked her “how long before the
stage would call for me.”
Turning her flashing black eyes upon me, she said, “Do
you mean to insult me, Miss Lee? The stage has been gone
an hour. I supposed you knew you were to remain.”
“Mr. Delafield intimated as much,” I answered; “but
my engagement was with you, not him, and until I hear from
you that I am expected to stay, I do not of course feel at
liberty to do so.”
She brightened up perceptibly, and after saying something
about Richard’s meddling in her affairs, replied, “I presume
you were embarrassed when you first came, and so could not
appear to advantage; and as my brother thinks you are a
tolerably fair scholar, I have decided to keep you.”
I bowed in acquiescence, and she continued. “There is
something, however, which I must first say to you; but as
this is not the proper place, you will go with me to my
room.”
I complied with her request, and closing the door, she
began with a long preamble as to the proper way for a
young lady to conduct herself in the presence of gentlemen,
especially those who were every way her superiors. “For
instance,” said she, “there’s my brother Richard, who is
rather noted for his familiar, affectionate manner towards
the ladies. As long as he confines himself to his equals I do
not so much mind it, but when he lavishes his attentions
upon my governesses, I think it wrong, for he might, you
242know, raise hopes which of course could never be realized
Now, Miss Rawson was a very silly girl who thought herself
beautiful, and ere I was aware of it she was deeply in
love with Richard. Of course, he cared nothing for her,
even if he did play with and caress her. It is his way, and
he means nothing by it. Then, too, Miss Rawson was
rather handsome, and Richard has always been a passionate
admirer of beauty. He used to say, when he was younger,
that he never could love a woman who was not beautiful,
and I’ve sometimes thought that the sight of a pretty face
completely upset him. For this reason I prefer having a
plain-looking governess. Miss Rawson was far too pretty,
and after my trouble with her I determined to employ none
but ugly ones. This is why I wrote to you concerning your
personal appearance, which is, I am sorry to say, so much
more prepossessing than I had reason to suppose. Still I
do not apprehend any difficulty, provided you are always
reserved and distant in Richard’s presence, and decline any
attentions he may occasionally offer you. Miss Montrose,
of whom you have heard us speak, will probably be home
this summer, and then his time will be occupied with her. I
do not think he will ever marry any one, but if he does, it
will undoubtedly be Ada. I won’t detain you longer,” she
added, as she saw me try to suppress a yawn; “I won’t
detain you any longer than to warn you once more against
being as silly as Miss Rawson was—the foolish thing—only
think of it, my governess in love with my brother, and he a
Delafield!”
It was very absurd, I thought; and mentally resolving
not to fall into a like error, I repaired to the schoolroom,
where in due time I was joined by the children, little
Jessie bringing me a beautiful bouquet, which she said
“Uncle Dick had arranged for me.”
243Feeling anxious to please Mrs. Lansing, my first impulse
was to send the flowers back, but upon second thoughts, I
concluded that this would not come under the head of
“attentions,” and so all the morning they stood in the tiny
vase, which Halbert brought to hold them, all except one
rose-bud which Jessie selected from the group, and twined
among my curls. This at the dinner-table attracted the
watchful eye of my employer, who, without any apparent
motive, casually remarked upon its beauty, saying, “It
looked like a species of rose which grew in her brother’s
garden,” and adding that “she did not know as there were
any of that kind on her grounds.”
I blushed crimson, while Jessie answered, “It didn’t
grow here. Uncle Dick brought it to her with a heap
more.”
Casting upon me a frowning glance, Mrs. Lansing said,
“Seems to me you have forgotten the conditions on which
I kept you.”
This was the first I had heard of conditions; but so
anxious was I to retain my situation, that I resolved to
please her at all hazards, and stammering out that “Jessie
put it in my hair,” I tore it from among my curls and threw
it upon the floor. Then, as soon as dinner was over, I went
up to the schoolroom, and removing the bouquet from the
vase, threw that too, from the window. Very wonderingly,
little Jessie looked up in my face, asking “why I did it,”
and if “I didn’t love flowers.”
“Very, very much,” I answered; “but your mother don’t
want me to keep them.”
That afternoon he came to visit us “officially,” he said,
and when I saw his winning manner, and how much of sunshine
he brought with him, I did not wonder that one as
susceptible as Miss Rawson was represented to be, should
244have fallen in love with him. But with me it was different.
I had been warned against his pleasant, affectionate ways;
and so, when in conversing with me and Lina, he threw his
arm around her waist and laid his hand carelessly upon my
shoulder, I moved quickly away, while I was sensible of a
deepening flush upon my face. He seemed puzzled, and for
an instant looked inquiringly at me, as if to ask a reason
for my conduct. He was showing Lina a book of engravings,
and after a while called me to look at a picture which
he thought was particularly fine. I complied with his
request, and wishing to see more, took a seat at his side,
when either purposely, or from force of habit, he threw his
arm across the back of my chair. The action reminded me
of Dr. Clayton, and I was feeling somewhat annoyed, when
looking up, I met the haughty eyes of Mrs. Lansing, who
was passing the door, and had stopped to look in. This of
course embarrassed me, and hardly knowing what I did, I
said rather angrily, “You will oblige me, Mr. Delafield, by
taking your arm from my chair. It does not look well.”
“Certainly,” said he, instantly removing it; “I was not
before aware that it was there,” and a very peculiar smile
was perceptible about his mouth, as he, too, caught sight of
his sister, who, with an approving nod for me, passed on.
I could have cried with vexation, for I feared he would
think me very prudish, and I knew well enough that his
familiarity was only the promptings of an unusually kind
and affectionate nature. After staying a few moments
longer, he arose to go, saying as he turned towards me,
“Jessie gave you my flowers, I suppose.”
“Yes sir,” I replied, while my face again grew scarlet.
“They were beautiful, and I thank you very much.”
“I am glad to hear it,” he continued, looking me steadily
in my eyes. “I thought perhaps, you did not like them
245when I found them on the walk, withered and dried by the
sun.”
I was trying to think what to say by way of apology for
thus treating his gift, when little Jessie came to my relief,
by saying, “She didn’t like to throw ’em away, but ma
didn’t want her to keep ’em.”
“Ah, yes. I understand it now,” said he, adding in an
undertone, as he shook my hand, in accordance with the
southern custom of bidding good-bye: “I hope, Miss Lee,
you will exercise your own judgment in such trivial matters
as that.”
That night I cried myself to sleep, half wishing I had
never come to Cedar Grove, for I knew Mrs. Lansing
would prove an exacting, unreasonable mistress; and when
Ada came home, my situation, I thought, would be anything
but agreeable; while, worse than all the rest, was the fear
that I had displeased Mr. Delafield, and appeared very
ridiculous in his eyes. Supposing he had put his arm on my
chair, was that any reason why I should get angry and
speak to him as I did? It was his way, and as he had said,
he was not himself aware of what he was doing. Of course,
then, he would think me very foolish, and would ever after
treat me with coolness and indifference. How then was I
surprised, when the next morning, in the presence of his
sister, he handed me a much larger and handsomer bouquet
than the one of the preceding day, saying, as he did so, “I
want you to keep this and not throw it away, as you did my
other one.”
Mrs. Lansing’s face, which had been unusually placid and
serene, now looked cloudy and disturbed; but she said
nothing; neither did she ever again make any allusion to
the flowers which so frequently came to me from Sunny
Bank. One reason for this might have been that she was
246otherwise perfectly satisfied with the conduct of her brother,
which, by the way, was not wholly satisfactory to me! It
is true, he was very polite, very kind; but there was about
him a reserve which I could not understand, for after that
little affair in the schoolroom, he never treated me with
the same familiarity which marked his deportment towards
the other young ladies, who came to the house. He did not
like me, I said, and the thought that I was disagreeable to
him made me very unhappy. To be sure, he was almost constantly
at Cedar Grove, where he spent most of the time in
the schoolroom, “superintending us,” he told his sister, who,
believing me rather inefficient, made no objection to his
supposed supervision of Lina’s studies. He did not often
talk much to me, but I frequently met the earnest gaze of
his piercing dark eyes, particularly when little Jessie sat in
my lap, listening to my instructions; and once when Herbert
asked him for “a copy,”—something beginning with “R,”
he wrote “Rosa Lee, Meadow Brook, Massachusetts.”
Still he disliked me—I was sure of that; and though I did
not then know why it was, the impression that I was to him
an object of aversion made me unhappy, and almost every
day I cried, while Mrs. Lansing more than once told me
that “she did not believe the South agreed with me, for I was
not half so plump and rosy as when I first came.”
About this time, too, a Miss Dean, from the village, who
had evinced quite a liking for me, told me, confidentially,
that Mr. Delafield and Ada were certainly engaged; adding,
that “it was sometimes sickening to see them together”—a
fact I could not doubt, knowing him as I did, and remembering
Ada’s demeanor towards Herbert when they
were engaged. From the same source, too, I learned that
Mr. Montrose and the elder Mr. Delafield had been warm
friends; and that the latter, who died when both Mrs.
247Lansing and Richard were quite young, had committed
them to the care of Mr. Montrose, who was to them the
kindest of fathers until the time of his death, which occurred
a few years after Mrs. Lansing’s marriage, when Richard
was just of age. To his guardianship, therefore, as to that
of a brother, had Mr. Montrose left his daughter, then a
beautiful girl of seventeen; and since that time she had lived
with Mrs. Lansing, who, though she appeared to love the
young orphan, still opposed her marriage with her brother;
not from any aversion to Ada, but because she did not wish
Richard to marry at all, as in case he did not, his property
would, in all probability, fall to her children, she being the
only heir. When I asked her why Mr. Delafield was worth
so much more than Mrs. Lansing, she replied, that the elder
Mr. Delafield, in his will, had left two-thirds of his property
to his son, bequeathing the other third to his daughter,
whose husband had wasted nearly the whole in his extravagant
manner of living. Cedar Grove, too, she said, was
mortgaged to Richard for more than it was worth, and it
was wholly owing to his forbearance and extreme generosity
that Mrs. Lansing was enabled to support her present style
of living. This, she said, aside from Mrs. Lansing’s hope
that her children would one day inherit her brother’s wealth,
was a sufficient reason why she wished him to remain a
bachelor, as the presence of a wife at Sunny Bank would, in
all probability, lessen his liberality towards herself. Miss
Dean, who seemed to be well posted, also told me that, in
case Mrs. Lansing saw her brother was determined to marry,
she would, of course, prefer that he should marry Ada, who
was quite a favorite, inasmuch as she had money of her own,
and was connected with one of the first families in South
Carolina.
All this I believed, and when I saw how anxious Mrs.
248Lansing appeared for Ada’s return, and how much interest
Mr. Delafield, too, seemed to take in her, I felt sure that
matters were at last amicably arranged, and that, for once,
rumor was right in saying that Sunny Bank would, in the
autumn, be graced by the presence of a mistress. Latterly,
Mr. Delafield had been making some repairs, and only a few
days before, when I chanced to be there with Jessie, he had
taken me through his library into a little, pleasant, airy
room, which he was fitting up with great elegance.
“This,” said he, laughingly, “I design as the boudoir of
Mrs. Delafield, when I shall be fortunate enough to boast
such an appendage to my household; and as a woman’s taste
is supposed to be superior to that of men, I want your
opinion. How do you like it? Do you think it would suit
my wife, if I had one?”
Of course he meant Ada, and in fancy I saw her reclining
upon the luxurious lounges, or gazing out upon the vine-wreathed
piazza, and wealth of flowers, which greeted my
view when I looked from the large bay window. For an
instant I dared not trust my voice to speak, and when at
last I did so, I am sure it must have trembled, for he came
to my side and looked me earnestly in the face, while he
smiled at my answer.
“It ought to suit her, unless her home heretofore has
been Paradise.”
After that I had not the least doubt of his engagement
with Ada, and I began seriously to think of going back to
Meadow Brook to take charge of a select school, which was
about to be opened there. I had now been in Georgia about
four months, and one night I went down to the pleasant
summer-house at the foot of the garden. It was a beautiful
moonlight night and the air was almost oppressive with the
sweet fragrance of the flowers. Why I went there I hardly
249know, only I fancied I could better make up my mind as to
my future course, if I were alone and in the open air. “Nobody
likes me here,” I said to myself, as I took a
seat within the arbor, “nobody but Halbert and Jessie.
Mrs. Lansing is freaky and cross. Lina, selfish and
indifferent, while Mr. Delafield thinks only of Ada’s return,
which I so much dread, and to be rid of meeting her,
I will go home before she comes.” So I decided that on
the morrow, I would make known my determination to Mrs.
Lansing, who I fancied would be glad, while Mr. Delafield
would not be affected either way. I was nothing to him—he
was nothing to me—so I reasoned, and then I made plans
for the future, just as other maidens of eighteen have done,
when their heart was aching with a heavy pain, whose cause
they did not understand. I should never marry—that was
a settled point—I should teach school all my days, and by
the time I was twenty-five (it seemed a great way off then) I
should have a school of my own, “Lee Seminary” I would
call it, and I had just completed the arrangement of the
grounds, which somehow bore a strong resemblance to those
of Sunny Bank, when I was roused from my reverie by the
sound of a footstep, and in a moment Mr. Delafield stood at
the entrance of the summer-house. He evidently did not
expect to find me there, for he started back at first, and then,
hoping he did not intrude, came to my side, saying, “A
penny for your thoughts, Miss Lee, provided they are not
as gloomy as your face would indicate.”
“You can have them for nothing,” I returned, elevating my
eyebrows, and drawing down the corners of my mouth as if
I felt that in some way he had injured me.
“You are blue to-night, and have been so for several
days. What is the matter?” he asked, at the same time
throwing his arms around my waist with his olden familiarity.
250Quickly remembering himself, however, he withdrew it,
saying as he did so, “I beg your pardon, Miss Lee. I am
so in the habit of taking such liberties, that I forgot myself!”
and he moved off a little distance. I could have cried
with vexation, for though it might have been improper, I
was perfectly willing to sit there with his arm around me!
It might have dispelled all idea of the “Lee Seminary” of
which I was to be Principal! But he gave me no such opportunity,
and folding his arms as if to keep them in their
place, he continued, “But tell me, Miss Lee, what is the
matter. You do not seem yourself?”
It was perfectly proper for me to tell him, I thought, and
very deliberately I unfolded to him my plan of returning
home within a week of Mrs. Lansing were willing, which I
was sure she would be, as she had never been quite satisfied
with my acquirements. When I had finished speaking, I
turned towards him, not to see what effect my words had
produced, for I had not the most remote idea that he would
care. Great then was my surprise, when I saw the blank
expression of his face, which looked darker than ever.
Starting up, he walked two or three times rapidly across the
little arbor, and then resuming his seat, said gently, “Have
you been unhappy here, Miss Lee?”
I could hardly repress my tears as I told him how much
I liked the south land, and how I should hate to leave it.
“Why then do you do so?” he asked; and I answered
“I can do more good at home; nobody likes me here.”
He came nearer to my side, as he said, “Nobody likes
you! oh, Rose, there is one at least who more than
likes”——
It was the first time he had ever called me Rose, and it
thrilled me with an indefinable emotion; but so impressed
was I with the idea of his engagement with Ada, that I
251never dreamed of interpreting his words, as I now think he
meant I should; and ere he could say more, I interrupted
him with, “Yes—little Jessie loves me, I know, and when I
think of her, I would fain stay.”
Still nearer to me he came, as he said, “And think you
Jessie is the only one who loves you?”
If ever Mrs. Lansing’s belief that I was non compos mentis
was verified, it was then; for with the utmost stupidity
I answered, “Why, no; Halbert likes me, but both he and
Jessie will forget me when I am gone, and learn to love
another.”
I think he was quite disgusted; for with a slight gesture
of impatience he changed his manner and in a very businesslike
way began to reason the case with me, urging a great
many reasons why I should not leave; the most potent
one with me, being the fact that he wanted me to stay—“he
would miss me very much,” he said, “for he liked my
society—it was a pleasure to talk with me, for he was sure
I meant what I said; I was natural—truthful—so different
from most of the young ladies (of course he excepted Ada),
and then, too, it seemed as if he had known me always, or
at least, had met me before, for my voice was familiar.”
I could not tell him of our meeting in Boston, but I saw
no harm in reminding him of the night, when for a few
hours I was his travelling-companion, and so to his last
remark, I answered, “We have met before, in the cars
between Utica and Albany.”
In some surprise he looked earnestly at me a moment,
and then said, “Is it possible? Why have you never
mentioned it before?”
“Because, sir,” I replied, “I did not suppose you would
remember me.”
He appeared thoughtful for a time, and then again, looking
252closely at me, said, “I did not, I believe, get a glimpse
of your features then, and still it seems as if I had seen
them before—or something like them. At all events, I
sometimes dream of a childish face, which must resemble
you as you were a few years ago.”
Once I half determined to remind him of the little girl
who fainted at the theatre; but ere I did so, he continued,
“When I met you in the cars, if I mistake not, you spoke
of Miss Montrose. Did you ever see her? but of course
not,” he added, ere I had time to reply. I cannot tell why
I shrank from acknowledging my slight acquaintance with
Ada, but I did, and for a moment I said nothing; then
thinking it would be wrong to give him a false impression, I
said, “I can hardly say that I am acquainted with Miss
Montrose; but I have met her several times at my uncle’s
in Boston, where I spent the winter, four years ago.”
Again he bent forward as if to scan my face, while he
replied, “Indeed! Were you in Boston then? It is
strange Ada never spoke of you, or you of her before.
Was there a misunderstanding between you?”
“Oh, no,” I answered quickly; “she was a fashionable
young lady, and I a mere school-girl; so, of course, we
knew but little of each other.”
“What was your uncle’s name?” he inquired; and I
answered “Lee,” noticing the while, how the shadow which
had settled upon his face at the mention of Boston, passed
gradually away.
For a moment he was silent, and then rather abruptly, he
asked, “Did you like her?”
I remembered the time when Dr. Clayton had asked me a
similar question concerning Dell Thompson, and now, as then,
I answered evasively, that “I hardly knew her—she was
very beautiful and accomplished.”
253Here he interrupted me by saying, “I did not ask if you
thought her beautiful. I asked if you liked her.”
I felt a little annoyed, for I thought he had no right thus
to question me, and forgetting that she was to be his wife,
I replied, “No sir, I did not like her. Neither do I think
she liked me, or my sister who was with me; and this is one
reason why I wish to leave before her return.”
I supposed he would be offended at hearing me speak
thus of her, but he was not; he merely smiled as he
answered, “Ada has many faults, I know, but I do not
believe your situation will be less pleasant on account of her
presence. If it is, just state the case to me. I am competent
to manage it, I believe; besides that, it is uncertain
how long she will remain at Cedar Grove.”
He commenced plucking at the green vine-leaves which
grew above my head, while I turned my face away to hide
my emotions; for of course, when Ada left Cedar Grove, it
would be as his bride, I thought, and was surprised when
he continued, “The cousin with whom she is travelling in
Europe, has won from her a half promise that she will spend
next winter with her in New Orleans, and if so she will
leave in October; so you see, she can’t annoy you long;
and now you must promise me not to leave us unless she
prove perfectly disagreeable.”
There is not, I believe, the least coquetry in my nature,
and I replied frankly that I would stay.
“You have made me very happy, Miss Lee,” said he,
rising up and laying his hand upon my head, just as a
father might caress his child, for he was thirty-one and I
was eighteen!
That night I pondered long upon what he had said,
recalling every word and look, and at last, when a ray of
light faintly glimmered upon my befogged intellect, I hid my
254face in the pillow, lest the moonlight, which shone around
me, should read thereon the secret thought which I scarcely
dared to harbor for a moment. Could it be possible that
he loved me, and but that for my unaccountably stupid
blunder in thrusting first Jessie and then Halbert in his face,
he would have told me so! But no—it was impossible. He
was probably engaged to Ada. She was beautiful and rich—I
was homely and poor. It could not be. And then, my
reader, did I first awake to the consciousness of how much I
loved him; and how, when he was wedded to another, the
world would be to me naught but a dreary blank. Anon, I
remembered my former affection for Dr. Clayton, and then I
grew calm. I had outgrown that, I said, and in all probability
I should outlive this, my second heart-trouble. So,
falling back upon the “Lee Seminary” as something which
was to comfort me in my lone pilgrimage, I fell asleep and
dreamed that Mr. Delafield’s children, amounting in all to
a dozen, were every one placed under my special charge!
CHAPTER XXII. ADA.
255
She was now daily expected, the vessel in which she had
sailed having landed at New York, and numerous preparations
in honor of her arrival were in progress at Cedar
Grove, where she was evidently regarded as a person of
consequence. The best chamber in the house was appropriated
for her use; Mr. Delafield himself taking much
interest in the arrangement of its furniture, and bringing
over each morning fresh bouquets of flowers, which, in costly
vases, adorned the apartment. Every one seemed anxious
and expectant, save Jessie and Halbert, the former of whom
did not wish her to come, as she took up so much of “Uncle
Dick’s” time, while the latter openly avowed his dislike,
saying, he wished she’d stay in Europe always.
As for myself, though there was no particular reason why
I should do so, I dreaded her arrival, and when at last,
word came to the schoolroom that she was in the parlor,
and the children must come down to see her, I stole out
into the garden, in order that I might put off the interview
with her as long as possible. I knew I must meet her at
the supper table, and so after a time I went up to my room
to dress, donning a plain white muslin, which I had often
been told became me better than aught else I could wear.
Before my toilet was finished, little Jessie came in and
256insisted upon twining among my curls a few simple buds,
which, she said, looked “mighty nice,” adding, as she stepped
back a pace or two to witness the effect, “I think you are
a heap prettier than Ada; but Uncle Dick don’t, ’cause I
asked him, and he said ‘Of course Ad was the handsomest.’
Hal says how he’s her beau, and I reckon he is,
for he kissed her like fury!”
“He kisses everybody, don’t he?” I asked; and she
replied,—
“Mighty nigh everybody but you. I never seen him kiss
you, and when I asked him why, he said you wouldn’t let
him—won’t you?”
“It wouldn’t be proper,” I said, smiling down upon the
little fairy, who, poised on one foot, was whirling in circles,
and then looking up into my face, with her soft dreamy
eyes.
At that moment the supper bell rang, and bounding away,
she left me alone. For full five minutes I waited trying to
summon sufficient courage to go down, and at last chiding
myself for my weakness, I started for the dining-room. My
footsteps were light, as they evidently were not aware of my
approach, for they were talking of me, and as I reached the
door, I heard Jessie, who was giving Ada a description of
her teacher, say, “Why she’s the properest person in the
world, for she won’t even let Uncle Dick kiss her.”
“Somewhat different from Miss Rawson,” said Ada, joining
in the general laugh; at the same time lifting her large,
languid eyes, she saw me, and started slightly, I fancied, as
she recognized me.
She had changed since I saw her last, and her face now
wore a weary, jaded look, while the dark circle beneath her
eyelids told of late hours and heated rooms.
“Miss Lee—Miss Montrose,” said Mrs. Lansing, and the
257proud Ada bowed haughtily to the humble governess, who
with heightened color took her accustomed seat at the
table.
“You have seen each other before, I believe,” said Mr.
Delafield, looking curiously at both of us, while Mrs. Lansing,
in much surprise, exclaimed, “Seen each other! Where,
pray?”
I waited for Ada to answer, and after staring at me a
moment, she replied, quite indifferently, “Miss Lee’s face
does seem familiar, and if I mistake not, I met her once or
twice in Boston”—and this was all she said, if I except a
glance, half entreating, half threatening, which she threw at
me from beneath her long, drooping eyelashes. This glance
I did not then understand, but I now know it to have been
prompted by a dread lest I should tell of her engagement
with Herbert Langley, and thus betray her to Mr. Delafield,
to whom, it seems, she had positively denied the whole, solemnly
assuring him that there had never been between them anything
more serious than a mere friendly acquaintance. When,
therefore, she saw me, her fears were awakened, and knowing
that I had her secret in my possession, she looked upon
me with suspicion and dislike, while I, wholly unconscious of
her feelings, had not the least intention of ever speaking of
the past, unless circumstances should render it necessary.
But of this she was not aware, and that night, in the privacy
of her room, she communed with herself as to the
best means of counteracting anything which I might say
concerning her conduct in Boston, deciding at last that the
surest way of accomplishing her object was to brand me as
a person whose word could not be trusted! And this she
deemed an easy task, inasmuch as no one there had ever
seen or heard of me before. Strange, too, as it may seem,
there was mingled with her distrust of me a slight shade of
258jealously lest Mr. Delafield should in any way notice me.
True, I was a poor obscure girl, earning my daily bread, and
on no point could I compete with her save one, and that was
age, I being, as she well knew, eight or nine years her junior.
To be old and unmarried was with her almost a crime,
and as year after year passed on, leaving her still Ada Montrose,
her horror of single blessedness increased, while at
the same time she seemed to look upon those much younger
than herself as almost her enemies, especially if they came
between her and Mr. Delafield, who, as the world goes, was
at the age of thirty-one more likely to choose a girl of
eighteen than one of twenty-seven. This, then, was my
fault. I was young and had also in my possession a secret
which she did not wish to have divulged, for well she knew that
one as upright and honorable as Mr. Delafield would despise
a woman who could stoop to a falsehood as she had done.
“No, it shall not be!” said she, as she sat alone in her
room with her face resting upon her hands; “it shall not be!
I will thwart her and she shall never triumph over me, as did
her pale-faced sister, but for whom I might now have borne
the title of Mrs. instead of trembling lest some one should
ask how old I am!” And the proud belle felt a pang of envy
towards my poor widowed sister whose heart was buried in
the grave of her unfortunate husband.
Not that she (Ada) had ever cared particularly for Herbert
Langley, but women of the world sometimes bestow
their hand where the heart cannot be given, and thus
might she have done had not circumstances prevented, for
she had then no hope of ever winning her guardian.
Here, ere we proceed farther, it may be well to relate
briefly her past history, going back to the time when on
his death-bed her father had not only given her to the
charge of Mr. Delafield, but had also made a request that, if
259it were consistent with his feelings, Richard would one day
make her his wife. As we have said elsewhere, Mr. Delafield
was a great admirer of beauty, and when he looked upon
the exceedingly lovely face of the youthful Ada, and thought
of her as a lonely orphan, his heart was touched, and he
found no difficulty in promising to protect her, and also to
make her his wife, if, upon a more intimate acquaintance,
he found her all he could wish her to be. That he did not
find her thus was proved by the fact that nearly ten years
had elapsed since her father’s death, and she was Ada Montrose
still, while he, as he grew older, seemed less likely to
find any one who fully came up to his standard of excellence,
beauty, in reality, now being of minor importance, notwithstanding
his sister’s assertion that he would never marry
one who had not a pretty face.
Upon this point, however, Ada had some doubts; for if
beauty were what he desired, she still possessed it to an uncommon
degree, and it did not seem to move him in the least.
Rumor, indeed, said they were on the eve of marriage, but she
knew better, for never yet had he really told her in earnest
that he loved her. It is true that years before, when she
first came a weeping orphan to Cedar Grove, he had devoted
himself to her entirely, feeling, perhaps, a little proud of his
ward, to whom he sometimes talked of love, or hinted vaguely
of the time when she would be his bride, as they wandered
together beneath the whispering pines, which grew around
his home, and once, when she was in Boston, he had actually
made up his mind to offer himself immediately and take
her to Sunny Bank as its mistress. To this resolution he
was urged by her cousin, a strong-minded woman, who, in
visiting at Cedar Grove, had labored to impress upon him
the sense of the duty he owed not only to her father but to
Ada herself, who was represented as loving him devotedly,
260and who was said to have made a vow never to marry unless
it were her guardian. Very artfully, too, did Mrs. Johnson
insinuate that her illness, of which they had heard, had
its origin in “hope deferred which maketh the heart sick.”
The knowledge that a beautiful girl loves you—nay, is
dying for you, is sufficient, I suppose, to touch the feelings
of men less susceptible to female charms than Richard Delafield,
and acting upon the impulse of the moment, he started
off without, however, leaving any word as to his destination.
Arrived in Boston, he went to the Revere House, where, as
we know, he casually heard of Ada’s engagement with Herbert
Langley. To say he was not disappointed would hardly
be just, for his self-pride was touched in knowing that
Ada had given her affections to another, and that other not
a very worthy object, if the word of his gossiping informer
was to be trusted. Too much displeased even to see her, he
had left the city immediately, declaring that he would never
again think of marriage with any one.
As the reader will remember, Ada heard of him through
one of her acquaintance, and from something her cousin had
written, she half guessed the nature of his visit. Accordingly
on her return to Georgia she several times in his presence
laughingly referred to the gossiping story, which, she said,
some of the Bostonians got up concerning her and a millionaire,
positively denying it, and wishing people would let her
alone! But all this was to no purpose. Mr. Delafield’s
impulse had subsided, and though his manner towards her
was always kind, affectionate, and brotherly, he never spoke
to her of love or marriage, except sometimes to ask her teasingly
if “if they were not both of them almost old enough to
get married.”
Still she did not despair, for of his own accord he had accompanied
her and her cousin to Europe, whither he had
261always intended to go, and though he had left them some
months before, Mrs. Johnson was willing to leave Paris, where
Ada’s beauty attracted much attention from the polite
Frenchmen, she would not believe he was at all weary of
her, but rather, as he had said, that his business required his
immediate return to America.
Latterly Mrs. Lansing had in a measure espoused her
cause, and knowing, as she did, of the recent repairs at Sunny
Bank, said by Richard to be for the benefit of his bride,
she began again to entertain sanguine hopes of eventually
becoming Mrs. Delafield, provided the governess did not, by
her foolish tattling, mar her prospects.
Such, then, was the state of affairs when I was the burden
of Ada’s thoughts, as she sat alone in her room on the
first night after her return home. For a time she mused
with her face in her hands, then lifting up her head and
throwing back the silken tresses, which fell over her brow,
she gazed long and earnestly at herself in the opposite mirror.
“Yes, I am fading,” she said at last, “and each year my
chance for winning him grows less, and if this Lee girl should
tell, it would take from me every shadow of hope—but it
shall not be. I can prevent her foolish tattling from doing
me harm, and I will.”
Then the better nature of Ada Montrose whispered to her
of the great wrong she was meditating against a poor, defenceless
girl, who as yet had never injured her, and for
a moment she wavered.
“If I only knew she would never tell,” said she; “but
she will, accidentally if not intentionally. Low-bred people
like her are always bold, and as she becomes better acquainted
with me, she may possibly say something to me about Herbert
in the presence of Mr. Delafield, who will question her,
262perhaps, and thus learn the whole. So I’ll be prepared.
She’s nothing but a poor governess, and my word will be
preferred to hers, provided I first give her the character of
a deceiver.”
On awaking next morning her resolution was partially
shaken, and might, perhaps, have been given up entirely, if,
in looking from her window, she had not seen a sight which
awoke within her the demon jealousy, by whose aid she could
do almost anything. The governess had arisen early, as was
her usual custom, and gone forth into the garden, where she
came unexpectedly upon Mr. Delafield, who, after expressing
his pleasure at meeting her, very quietly drew her arm
within his own, and then walked with her several times
through the garden, casting often admiring glances towards
the drooping figure at his side, who, trembling lest the Argus
eyes of Mrs. Lansing were upon her, would fain have been
left alone. All this Ada saw, and as she thought how different
was his manner towards Rose from what it had ever
been towards her, a sudden light flashed upon her. She had
not lived twenty-seven years for nothing, and like Dicken’s
woman with the “mortified bonnet,” she knew the signs,
and with a sinking heart, she exclaimed, “Is it possible that
he loves her?”
The thought was maddening, and now strengthened tenfold
in her purpose of working the young girl evil, she went
forth into the garden to meet them, nodding coldly to Rosa,
and bestowing her sweetest smile upon her guardian, who
wound his arm around her waist and playfully kissed her forehead—a
liberty he would not dare to have taken with Rose,
who, thinking that of course she was not wanted, made an
effort to withdraw her hand. But Mr. Delafield’s arm was
strong, and he pressed it closely to his side, at the same time
giving her a look which bade her stay, notwithstanding that
263Ada two or three times hinted to her the propriety of
going.
“Why don’t you ask Miss Lee about your Boston
friends?” said Mr. Delafield, when they had taken a few
turns in silence.
Ada tossed her head scornfully, and replied, “I don’t
think I had any acquaintances in common with Miss Lee,
unless, indeed, it were her old aunty;” and with a little hateful
laugh she leaned across Mr. Delafield, and asked, “How
is she? Richard, you would like to know.”
I was provoked at her manner, but I answered civilly that
my aunt was well, adding, as one would naturally do, “Herbert
Langley, I suppose you know, is dead.”
The news was unexpected, and coming as it did, it produced
upon her a singular effect, blanching her cheek to a
marble whiteness, while her lips quivered spasmodically. Mr.
Delafield was startled, and stopping short, demanded of her
what was the matter.
“Oh, nothing much,” she answered, recovering her composure,
and pressing her hand upon her side, “nothing but
an ugly pain, which is gone now. I have felt it often lately,”
and her face looked as unruffled and innocent as if she
really thought it was the truth she had uttered.
I knew she told a falsehood, but Mr. Delafield did not, and
leading her to the summer-house, which was near, bade her
sit down, while he made minute inquiries concerning the
pain, asking how long since she first felt it, and saying he
would speak to Dr. Matson the first time he came to Cedar
Grove, adding that a blister, he presumed, would help it!
“Oh, mercy!” she exclaimed, again growing pale. “You
make too serious a matter of it.”
But he did not think so—he was very tender of her, as
a brother would be of his orphaned sister; and knowing that
264her mother had died of consumption, he watched narrowly
for the first indications of that disease in her. Just then
little Jessie came bounding down the walk, saying that
“breakfast was ready,” and leading her by the hand, I returned
to the house, followed by Mr. Delafield and Ada, the
latter of whom made some remark concerning my gait, which
she pronounced “wholly Yankee and countrified.”
“And graceful,” rejoined Mr. Delafield, at the same time
telling her he did not like to hear one female speak disparagingly
of another.
Ada bit her lip with vexation, and when she took her seat
at the table, she was evidently not in the best of humors. At
Mrs. Lansing’s invitation her brother remained to breakfast,
and I could not perceive that he was any more polite to the
beautiful lady in elegant French muslin on his right, than he
was to the plain-looking girl in a shilling calico on his left.
Indeed, if there was a difference, it was in favor of the latter,
with whom he conversed the most, addressing her as if
she had at least common sense, while towards Ada he always
assumed the trifling, bantering manner which he seemed to
think was suited to her capacity.
Breakfast being over, I started for my room, accidentally
dropping upon the stairs a handkerchief, which had been
given me by Anna, and which had her name “Anna Lee”
marked in the corner. In honor of Ada’s return, there was
no school that day, and as the morning advanced and the
heat in my chamber grew oppressive, I went with my book
to the sitting-room, and took a seat by an open window,
where I soon became so absorbed in reading as not to observe
Mrs. Lansing and Ada, who came out upon the piazza
and sat down quite near me, but still in such a position that
neither of us could see the other. After a time they were
joined by Mr. Delafield, and then for a moment I thought
265of stealing quietly away, but thinking my remaining there
could do no harm, I resumed my book and forgot my neighbors
entirely, until my attention was roused by the sound
of my own name.
It was Mrs. Lansing who spoke, and she asked, “What
kind of folks are those relatives of Miss Lee?”
“Oh, about so so,” answered Ada, and Mrs. Lansing continued,
“And she was then at school? I believe.”
“At school!” repeated Ada, apparently in much surprise.
“Mercy, no! Why, she was a grown up woman, as much as
twenty-two or twenty-three years old.”
“There, I thought so,” answered Mrs. Lansing, who the
reader will remember had, at my first introduction, taken me
to be twenty-five. “I thought she must be more than
eighteen, didn’t you, Richard?”
“Eighteen!” repeated Ada. “It isn’t possible she calls
herself eighteen. She dare not do it in my presence. Why,
she had been a teacher, I don’t know how long, and, besides
that, ’twas said that she had once been engaged to a Dr.
Clayton, who, for some reason, jilted her, and was then a
married man as much as thirty years old. Eighteen, indeed.
I’d like to hear her say so.”
I was confounded, but supposing she had mistaken me
for Anna, my first impulse was to go out and tell her so, but
fearing lest she should think I had intentionally listened, my
second thought was to go away where I could hear nothing
further, and then, when Mrs. Lansing questioned me, as
I felt sure she would, I fancied it would be an easy matter
to exonerate myself from the falsehood Ada had put upon
me. I had reached the hall, and was half-way up the stairs,
when Mr. Delafield, who had arisen and was walking back
and forth on the piazza, espied me, and called me back.
There was a troubled look on his face, and fixing his
266piercing black eyes upon me as if he would read my inmost
thoughts, he said with something of bitterness in the tones
of his voice, “I did think I had found one female who, on all
occasions, spoke the truth; but if what Ada has said is
true, I am mistaken; though why you (and his hand involuntarily
clutched my arm) or any other woman should stoop
to a falsehood, or seek to deny her age, be she a hundred or
less, is a secret which Heaven knows, perhaps, but I do not.”
I felt my face flush with indignation, and turning towards
Ada, who, not having expected a scene like this, was very
pale, I said, “It is not necessary, Miss Montrose, for you to
repeat what you have asserted concerning me, for I accidentally
overheard it, and I thank Mr. Delafield for giving me
an opportunity to exonerate myself from the charge you are
pleased to bring against me.”
“Been listening,” muttered Mrs. Lansing.
“Silence, Angeline. Go on, Rose,” interrupted Mr. Delafield,
in a voice which we both obeyed, she resuming her
needlework, while I continued, “I had taken my seat by
the open window ere you and Miss Montrose came out here,
and not thinking it necessary to leave, I remained, without,
however, hearing a word of your conversation until I caught
the sound of my name. Then, indeed, my senses were sharpened,
and I heard Miss Montrose’s statement, which I am
sure she would never have made were she not laboring under
a mistake.”
Here Ada, who was not in the least prepared for the occasion,
began to stammer out something about “letting the
matter drop—she did not wish to harm me, and had said
what she did inadvertently, without ever dreaming of
making trouble. She didn’t see why Richard wished to
make it such a serious matter, for she was sure she didn’t
care whether I were forty or eighteen.”
267“But I care,” he said, grasping my arm still tighter, “I
care to have justice done. I have supposed Miss Lee to be
frank, ingenuous and truthful, and if what you assert is true,
she is the reverse, and should suffer accordingly, while on
the contrary if she be innocent, she shall have an opportunity
of proving herself so.”
By this time Ada had collected her scattered senses, and
resolving to brave the storm she had raised, replied, “Certainly,
Miss Lee has a right to clear herself if she can, and
prove that she is really Rose instead of Anna Lee.”
“Rose instead of Anna! What do you mean?” thundered
Mr. Delafield, while I was too much astonished to speak.
Ada was not very deep, and in all her plotting she had
never thought how easy it would be for me to prove the
falsity of her assertion by writing home; so with the utmost
coolness she replied, “I mean this:—there were two Lee
girls living at the house of their uncle where I occasionally
visited: one was Anna, a young lady of twenty-two or twenty-three,
the other was Rose, a school-girl of fourteen or fifteen.
The oldest of these two I have every reason to believe stands
before us—at least this, which I found upon the stairs,
would indicate as much,” and she held to view the handkerchief
which I had dropped and had not missed.
Glancing at the name, Mrs. Lansing said, “I have observed
a similar mark upon several of her garments, and
rather wondered at it.”
This was true, for Anna had dealt generously with me,
giving me many of her clothes, some of which bore her full
name, while others had merely the initials. I was about to
tell of this, when Mr. Delafield prevented me by asking if I
could prove that I was what I represented myself to be, and
that I was a mere school-girl when I saw Miss Montrose in
Boston.
268“Yes, sir, I can,” I answered firmly; “by writing home,
I can prove it, if in no other way. But Miss Montrose
knows better than to confound me with Anna, whom she
surely has reason for remembering.”
Fearful lest her darling secret was about to be divulged,
Ada roused up and in a tone of angry defiance, answered,
“Yes, I have reason for remembering you, for you did me
good service by taking off my hands a worthless, drunken
fellow, about whom the Bostonians were annoying me. I
thank you for it, Miss Lee, and only wonder how you could
suppose I would forget you. I recognized you the moment
we met at the table, but I did not then dream of your calling
yourself eighteen when you are certainly twenty-six!”
I was confounded and remained speechless, while with renewed
strength my accuser continued, “Perhaps you will
deny having been a teacher at that time, when according to
your statement you were only fourteen.”
“No,” I answered, “I do not deny that; I had taught,
but I was only thirteen when I did so, as any one at home
will testify.”
“Thirteen! how improbable!” exclaimed Mrs. Lansing,
while Ada continued, “And what of your engagement with
Dr. Clayton. I heard it from the lips of your aunt; but
perhaps she told me a falsehood?” and she looked maliciously
at me, while with a stamp of his foot Mr. Delafield said
sternly, “Ada, you have no right to question her of that.”
“But I am glad she did,” I said, “for as I live, I have
never been engaged to any man.”
“Nor in love with one either? Will you say you were
never in love with Dr. Clayton?” persisted Ada.
It was a cruel question, but I could not deny it, and I remained
silent, while I cowered beneath the burning gaze of
Mr. Delafield, who still held me fast, but who now loosened
269his hold, and slightly pushing me from him, leaned against
the pillar, with folded arms, and dark, lowering brow, while
Mrs. Lansing and Ada exchanged glances of triumph. They
had by my silence gained a partial advantage over me, but
as long as I felt the clasp of Mr. Delafield’s hand, I was
strong to defy them. Now, however, that had failed me,
and girl-like I began to cry, telling them “they could easily
test the whole matter by writing either to Boston or
Meadow Brook.”
This alternative had not occurred to Ada before, but now
she readily saw how easily I could prove my innocence, and
as she met Mr. Delafield’s inquiring glance, she turned very
pale and laid her hand upon her side as if the pain had returned.
“Rose,” said Mr. Delafield, “you would hardly wish for
me to write to Meadow Brook were you guilty, and as you
seem willing that we should do so, I am inclined to hope that
Ada may be mistaken. Come, stand by me (and reaching
out his hand he drew me to his side) and tell me all the
particulars of your acquaintance with Miss Montrose, and
also about that sister with whom you are confounded, and
you (turning to the other ladies) are not to speak, until she
is through, when Ada can make any correction or explanation
necessary.”
It was an act of justice which I owed to myself, I knew,
and wiping my eyes, I was about to commence, when Ada,
rising up, said mockingly, “With the Hon. Judge’s permission
I will leave, as I do not wish to hear the falsehoods
which I am sure will be uttered.”
Again Mr. Delafield’s long arm was extended, and catching
Ada, as she was passing, he drew her to his side, where
he held her firmly, saying, “It looks suspicious, Ada, that
you are not willing to hear Miss Lee’s defence. You have,
270either by mistake or design (the former, I hope), preferred
against her serious charges, and you must listen to her explanation.
Commence,” he added, looking down upon me, and
in a firm, unfaltering manner I told both my story and that
of Anna, who, I said, had eloped with Herbert Langley and
was now a broken-hearted widow, living with his mother in
Boston.
At this part of my narrative Ada’s hand was pressed convulsively
on her side, while with parted lips and pale cheeks
she leaned forward, looking at me anxiously; but when she
saw that I did not speak of her ever having been engaged
to Herbert, the color came back to her face, and with a sigh
of relief she listened more composedly, nodding assent when
I referred her to our meeting at the dépôt at Canandaigua,
and faintly admitting that “she might have been mistaken.
I looked so much like Anna that ’twas not impossible.”
This I knew was false, but I did not contradict her, and
proceeded with my story, until suddenly recollecting the incident
at the theatre, I turned to Mr. Delafield and asked
“if he remembered it?”
He thought a moment, and then the arm, which had gradually
been winding itself about my waist, clasped me to his
side, while he exclaimed, “Remember it? Perfectly, and you
are that little girl. They called you Rose;—and this is
why your face has puzzled me so much. I see it all now.
You are innocent, thank Heaven,” and the hand, which,
heretofore, had held Ada fast, now rested caressingly upon
my head and parted back my curls, as he said, more to himself
than to me, “and you have remembered me all this time.”
Then, turning towards Ada, he said sternly, “We will hear
you now.”
Ada was caught in her own snare. She had thought to
prevent me from doing her injury by branding me as a liar,
271and now that I was proved innocent, it filled her with confusion,
and she remained silent until Mrs. Lansing came to
her aid by saying, “I do not think Ada meant to do wrong;
she probably mistook Rose for her sister, hence the blunder.”
This gave Ada courage, and crossing over to me, she took
my hand, begging my forgiveness and saying “she had been
mistaken—she certainly did not mean to do me so great a
wrong, and she hoped I would forget it and try to look upon
her as my friend, for such she would henceforth be.”
I was not quite verdant enough to credit all that Ada
said; but I replied I was willing to forgive her, and when
she asked permission to kiss me, so that the reconciliation
might be perfect, I offered no resistance, though I did not
return the compliment, for which I think Mr. Delafield felt
gratified—at least I read as much in his face. During the
progress of my story Ada had alternately turned red and
white, particularly at the points where I touched upon Herbert.
This did not escape the observation of Mr. Delafield,
and suspecting more than Ada thought he did, he half seriously,
half playfully asked her “why she had evinced so
much feeling whenever Mr. Langley’s name was mentioned.”
Instantly the color left her face, which wore a livid hue,
and her hand went up to her side as if the cause of her agitation
were there, while with a half stifled moan, she said,
“Oh, oh!—the pain!”
Of course Mrs. Lansing asked what she meant, and Ada,
in answering her, managed to dwell so long upon “the horrid
pain, which she feared would become chronic,” that Mr.
Delafield could not reasonably expect an answer to his question.
Still, I think, he was not satisfied, and when I saw
the mischievous look in his eye, as he told her “she must
certainly be blistered,” I fancied that he, too, understood her
as I did.
272That afternoon we were again assembled upon the piazza,
Mrs. Lansing, Ada, and myself, the former nodding in her
large willow chair, while the latter sat upon a little stool at
my feet, and with her elbow upon my lap was looking up
into my face with the childish simplicity she knew so well
how to assume. She was just asking me to assure her
again of my forgiveness when Mr. Delafield joined us, and
coming up behind me leaned over my chair, while he handed
to Ada a little oblong package, saying, “I was in the
village just after dinner, and seeing the Dr. I asked him
about your pain. As I expected, he prescribed a blister, and
at my request he prepared one, which you are to apply at
night when you go to bed!”
I could not see him, but I absolutely pitied poor Ada,
who began to realize that the way of the transgressor is
hard. The tears started to her eyes, while with a look of
dismay, she exclaimed, “Oh, Richard, how could you? I
never was blistered in my life. It will kill me. I can’t do
it,”—and she cried aloud.
Very gently, Mr. Delafield soothed her, telling her that
so far from “killing her,” it would certainly “cure her,” he
knew it would, and he insisted upon her trying it. At last,
as an idea, perfectly natural, under the circumstances,
dawned upon her mind, she looked up very submissively
at him and said, “To please you, I’ll try it; though the
remedy, I think, is worse than the disease.”
I hardly know whether he had any faith in her words—I
certainly had not, and when next morning she came down
to breakfast in a loose wrapper, with a very languid look, I
could not bring myself to ask her concerning the blister,
which the livelong night had drawn nicely—on the back of
the fire-board, in her room! As I expected, Mr. Delafield
soon made his appearance, and after inquiring how his prescription
273worked, and if it had pained her much, he said,
looking towards neither of us, “How would you like to ride
on horseback with me out to Mr. Parker’s plantation? I
have business there, and do not wish to go alone.”
“Oh, charming!” exclaimed Ada, jumping up and
clapping her hands in a manner but little suited to a
blistered side; “that will be grand, and I can wear my
new riding-dress, which fits so nicely.”
“Why, Ada, what do you mean?” said Mr. Delafield,
with great gravity. “My invitation was intended for Miss
Lee. You can’t, of course, think of riding on horseback
with a blister. You must have forgotten it!” and his keen
eyes rested upon her face with a deeper meaning than she
could fathom.
She turned very red, and for an instant, I think, half
resolved to acknowledge the deception she was practising.
But Richard Delafield was one who despised a falsehood,
and she dared not confess to him her error, so she turned
away, saying with a feigned indifference which illy accorded
with the expression of her face, “Surely, I forgot all
about it.”
Alone in her room, however, she shed tears of anger and
mortification as she saw us ride off together, and thought
of the happiness from which she was debarred by a
fancied blister, which had never come in contact with her
flesh. But whether it drew upon her side or the fire-board,
it in a measure wrought the desired cure, for seldom again
did Ada attempt to deceive her guardian. Would it not be
well if more of our modern young ladies should be blistered
for the same disease that afflicted Ada Montrose.
It was nearly dark when we returned, and Mrs. Lansing
274and Ada were in their accustomed places upon the piazza,
the latter holding an open letter which she had that afternoon
received from her cousin Mrs. Johnson, who was
spending some time in Mobile, and who wished Ada to join
her there, before going on to New Orleans. They were
evidently discussing the matter, and when we came up, Ada
handed the letter to Mr. Delafield, bidding him read it and
tell her what to do. Hastily running it over, he said, “Go,
by all means: you have never seen Mobile, and it will be a
good opportunity.”
“But I have been thinking of giving up my visit to New
Orleans,” she continued in a kind of beseeching tone; “Mrs.
Lansing had rather I’d remain with her this winter.”
It was not so dark as to prevent me from seeing the
expression of Mr. Delafield’s face, and I fancied the proposition
did not altogether please him. She evidently thought
so too, for rather pettishly she added, “but if you wish to
be rid of me, of course I’ll go.”
“Ada! How foolish!” he said, sternly. “I’ve often
heard you express a desire to spend a winter in New
Orleans, and now that an opportunity is presented, I think
you had better accept it. I shall be there a part of the
time, perhaps all,” he added; and then I turned away lest
my face should betray what was passing within.
“And will you go with me to Mobile?” Ada asked of
him, as a child would ask her father.
“Certainly,” he answered; “I do not propose letting
you go alone. But how is that side? I’d almost forgotten
to ask.”
“It has pained me a good deal,” said she, “but Martha
dressed it nicely this afternoon, and it feels much better.
I’m so glad you made me apply it, now the worst is over,
for I believe it will do me good!”
275She spoke with every appearance of candor, and much as
it surprised him, Mr. Delafield was, I thought, partially, if
not wholly, convinced that what she said was true, and that
he had suspected her of more than she deserved; for his
manner towards her changed, and as if trying to make
amends, he devoted himself to her entirely for the remainder
of the evening, telling her where they would go when they
were in New Orleans, and laying many plans for her pleasure.
Once in his zeal he thoughtlessly threw his arm
around her waist, but she instantly shrank back, saying,
“don’t—don’t—you hurt!”
This convinced him thoroughly, and I slept and woke twice
that night ere the sound of their voices ceased upon the
piazza, where their long interview was kept in countenance
by Mrs. Lansing, who sat up until he left, and then patting
Ada’s cheek, told her she thought “her prospects were
brightening.”
I thought so, too, and there was a shadow on my heart,
when I saw how much they were together during the few
weeks which elapsed before her departure for Mobile. It is
true he was still kind to me as of old; and whenever he
found that Ada, by word or look, had slighted me, he
always managed to let her know how much he disapproved
her conduct, so that in his presence she was usually polite,
though she could not quite conceal the fact that I was to
her an object of dislike.
It was nearly the middle of October, when Ada finally
left us for Mobile, accompanied by Mr. Delafield, who, in
bidding us good-bye, said we need not be surprised if he did
not return in several weeks. I consider it to be my misfortune
that my face generally betrays all I feel, and with his
physiognomic powers he could not fail to see the effect
which his words produced upon me, for well I knew how
276lonely Cedar Grove would be without him; and when after
he was gone, little Jessie climbed into my lap, and laying
her head upon my shoulder wished “Uncle Dick never
would go away,” I mentally responded to the wish. The
whole household seemed more or less affected; Mrs.
Lansing was cross; Lina careless; Halbert fretful; and
Jessie unhappy—while I began to be haunted with my
old project of returning home; and I should, perhaps,
have proposed it to Mrs. Lansing, had it not been that, at
the close of the fifth day, we were greatly surprised at Mr.
Delafield’s unexpected return. He didn’t like Mobile, he
said, and would much rather be at home.
Numerous were the questions asked by Mrs. Lansing concerning
Ada and the pain in her side, which last, Mr.
Delafield said, had left her entirely, owing, he believed, to
the timely application of the blister. He was deceived, I
thought, and I must confess to a slight feeling of gratification
at an occurrence which thoroughly convinced him
of his mistake. One night, a few days after his return, old
Hagar, his head cook, came over to Cedar Grove, groaning
with rheumatism, which she termed “a misery in her
back.” Lina, to whom her complaints were made, listened
a while, and then opening an old paper-box which stood
under the table, drew forth a plaster, which she said she
“had done found in Miss Ada’s room, on t’other side the
fire-board, oncet when she was clarin’ the fire-place.”
As Ada was gone she thought there was no harm in
appropriating it to herself, which she accordingly did,
laying it carefully away until it should be needed. The
recital of Hagar’s aches and pains reminded her of it, so she
urged it upon the old negress, assuring her it must be good,
or white folks would never use it! With many thanks
Hagar hobbled home, applied her plaster, and went to bed!
277But, alas! for the expected relief, which came only in burning
sensations and stinging pains, eliciting many a groan from
the poor old lady, who heroically bore it until morning,
when she found herself unable to perform her accustomed
duties.
For a long time Mr. Delafield waited for his breakfast,
which was at last served up by Hagar’s daughter, who gave
such a deplorable account of her mother’s condition that the
moment breakfast was over he went himself to the cabin,
where he found the old lady moaning over her blistered
back, which she said, “was a heap harder to bar than the
rheumatics.”
A few words explained the whole, for Hagar never concealed
aught from her master, and so she gave the history
of her plaster, which now lay upon the hearth in the ashes,
where she had thrown it. Quick as thought the truth burst
upon Mr. Delafield, who laughed so long and loud, that Aunt
Hagar, thinking that he was making light of her misfortunes,
began to cry, saying she “never thought Mars’r
Richard would poke fun at her misery.”
“Neither am I making fun of you,” said he, adding further,
by way of atoning for his error, that for the remainder
of the week she should be freed from all household service,
and devote her whole time, if she liked, to her aching
back.
This had the effect of restoring Aunt Hagar to good
humor, and in the midst of her thanks, Mr. Delafield returned
slowly to the house, thinking that when a habit of
deception is once firmly fixed, it required more to cure it
than a blister applied to the fire-board!
CHAPTER XXIII. DR. CLAYTON.
278
Rapidly, and to me very happily, did the winter pass
away, for it was enlivened by the presence of Mr. Delafield,
who was with us so often, that it became at last a serious
debate among the blacks as to whether Cedar Grove or
Sunny Bank were really his home. More than once, too,
was it whispered in the village, that little Rosa Lee, plain
and unassuming as she was, had stirred in the heart of the
“stern old bachelor” a far deeper feeling than Ada Montrose
had ever been capable of awakening. And sometimes
she, foolish child that she was, thought so too, not from anything
he said, neither from anything which he did; indeed,
it would have been hard for her to tell why her heart sometimes
beat so fast when he was near, for though his manner
was always kind and considerate, he never spoke to her of
love—never appeared as he had once done in the summer-house,
when she gave him such silly answers!
And still, occasionally, Rosa dared to hope that her love
was returned, else why did each day find him at her side
where he lingered so long, saying to her but little, but
watching her movements, and listening to her words, as he
would not have done had she been to him an object of indifference.
Not naturally quick to read human nature, Mrs.
Lansing was wholly deceived by her brother’s cold exterior,
279and never dreaming how in secret he worshiped the humble
girl she called her governess, she left them much together.
Why then did he never speak to her of the passion which
had become a part of his being? Simply because he, too,
was deceived. Once, indeed, he had essayed to tell her of
his love, and dreading lest his affection should not be returned,
he was the more ready to construe her evasive replies
into a belief that it was indeed as he feared.
Then, too, her shy, reserved manner, while it made him
prize her all the more, disheartened him; for not thus was
he accustomed to being treated, and with that jealousy
which seems to be the twin sister of love, he ofttimes thought
he read aversion and distrust, when there was, on Rosa’s
part, naught save a fear lest he should discover her secret,
and despise her for it. Added to this was the remembrance
of what Ada had said concerning her former engagement
with Dr. Clayton. True, Rosa had denied the engagement,
but when charged with having loved him she had remained
silent; thus proving the story correct. And if she loved
him when a child, was it not probable that she loved him
still, married man though he was. He had heard of such
things, or, at least, he had read of them in books, and for
many days Mr. Delafield’s brow was literally tied up in
knots, while he tried to solve the question as to “whether,
having loved once and been deceived, Rosa Lee could love
again.”
At last he decided that possibly she could, and his mind
was fully made up to talk with her upon the subject, when
an unexpected arrival blasted his hopes at once, and darkened
the glimmering sunlight which was dawning upon his
horizon. It was a dark, rainy night, toward the last of
April, that I sat with the family in the pleasant little sitting-room.
As usual, Mr. Delafield was with us, and this evening
280he was reading aloud from Longfellow’s wonderful poem.
He was just in the midst of Hiawatha’s wooing, and I fancied
there was in the tones of his voice a softer cadence as
he read,
“Hand in hand they went together,
Through the woodland and the meadow,
Left the old man standing lonely
At the doorway of his wigwam,
Heard the falls of Minnehaha
Calling to them from the distance,
Crying to them from afar off,
Fare thee well, oh, Laughing Water.”
Scarcely had the last words left his lips when a heavy
tread upon the piazza and a loud ringing of the bell startled
us, for it was not often that we were favored with visitors
on such a night as this. Zillah, the colored girl, hastened
to the door where she found a stranger, who, stepping into
the hall, asked, “if Miss Rosa Lee lived there.”
Starting from my chair, I turned very white, for I recognized
the voice of Dr. Clayton, who the next moment stood
before me! I forgot the past—forgot that he had been my
lover—forgot that Richard Delafield’s eyes were upon me—forgot
every thing except that he had come from dear New
England—had breathed the air of my native hills—had
heard the sound of my mother’s voice—and had brought
me undoubtedly tidings of that mother’s welfare. Springing
forward with a cry of joy I took his extended hand, nor
shrank away when, with unwonted tenderness, he stooped
to kiss my lips, low whispering as he did so, “Dear Rosa.”
Then, indeed, I blushed, for I knew he had no right to
call me thus, but the next moment it was forgotten, and
with something of pride in my manner, I presented him to
Mrs. Lansing and Mr. Delafield, the latter of whom greeted
him rather coldly, and after a few words of common courtesy,
281bade us good night, but not until he had learned what,
until that moment, was news to me, viz. that Dell Clayton
had been dead nearly six months! As he passed me on
his way out, he said so low that no one else could hear him,
“Fare thee well, oh, Laughing Water,” referring to the line
he had last read. There was a deep scowl upon his dark
face, and as I gazed upon him, I could not help wondering
if it were thus the old man looked, when from his lonely
wigwam door he watched the departing footsteps of his
daughter.
“Come again to-morrow, uncle Dick,” said little Jessie,
following him into the hall; but he made her no answer,
save his accustomed good-bye kiss, and I soon heard his
heavy tread as he strode down the winding walk and out
into the open field, muttering to himself, as I afterwards
learned:
“And she will follow where he leads her,
Leaving all things for the stranger.”
Yes, Mr. Delafield was jealous—terribly jealous of Dr.
Clayton, the nature of whose business he readily divined,
though I did not, and nothing was further from my mind
than the thought that he intended honoring me with a
chance of becoming Mrs. Clayton 2d. And yet it was
this alone which had brought him to Georgia, he taking
the precaution to send on in advance a letter, in which he
had made known his wishes, and asked for a return of the
affection which, for five long years, he said, had never
known one moment of abatement, even though another had
slept upon his bosom as his wife. But she was gone, and in
her place, he would see blooming, he said, the Rose he had
loved so long. Owing to some detention, this letter had
failed to reach me, hence I was wholly unprepared for the
scene which followed when, at last we were left alone.
282Well skilled in the signs, Mrs. Lansing had purposely
retired, not long after her brother’s departure, while I,
suspecting nothing, made no objection when Dr. Clayton
took his seat upon the sofa at my side. I was talking to
him of Anna, and from speaking of her, and poor Herbert’s
death, it was an easy transition to Dell, of whom he spoke
kindly, nay, even affectionately, as he told me of her last
days; how much she suffered, and how gentle she became,
never chiding him, in the least, for a thing unskillfully done,
but seeming satisfied with everything, and loving him at
last with a love which, had it been earlier born, would have
shed happiness over his comparatively cheerless life. Then
he told me of the little child, not yet three years old, whom
he had called “Rosa Lee,” and gently pushing back my
curls, and gazing down into my face, he said, “It is a fancy
of mine, perhaps, but I love to think she looks like you,
who should have been her mother.”
With all my stupidity, I understood him then, and blushing
crimson, I moved away to the end of the sofa, while he
continued, “What did you think of my letter? You received
it, I suppose?”
I had received no letter, and so I said; whereupon he
proceeded to tell me its contents, a part of which the reader
already knows. Utterly confounded and powerless to move,
I sat motionless, while, with his arm around me, he went
over with the past, recalling to my mind, with a vividness
which made it seem real again, the time when first he had
found me weeping in the sombre old schoolroom, away to
the northward; the night when, with the soft moon-beams
falling around us, we sat together beneath the tall oak tree,
while I laid before him my childish griefs; and, lastly, the
many pleasant hours we had whiled away together, listening
to the sound of the running brook, which ran past the twining
283grape-vine, whose broad leaves had rustled above our
heads.
“On these occasions, Rose,” said he, “did nothing ever
tell you how much you were beloved?”
“Yes,” I answered bitterly, my woman’s nature rousing
up as I remembered the times to which he referred. “Yes,
and what did it avail me, even though I was beloved?
Ambition proved the stronger attraction of the two, and
you wedded another. You, who, now that other has gone,
would talk again to me of love; but Rosa Lee is no longer
a child to be deceived, and you mistake her strangely, if
you fancy you can cast her off and take her up again at
will.”
Here, overcome with emotion, I burst into tears. My
words and manner misled him, for in them he saw only
resentment for his former treatment; and this inspired him
with hope that the feeling I once cherished for him could
again be nourished into life. Very tenderly, then, he talked
to me, and, as I listened, a numbness crept over my heart,
for I knew he was in earnest now, and I felt that it was not
the Dr. Clayton of old—the fickle, selfish man of the world—with
whom I had to deal, but Dr. Clayton purified, and
made better by the trials through which he had passed—a
noble, true-hearted, and upright man—who now laid at my
feet the love which I knew had always been mine. Very
earnestly he implored forgiveness for the wrong he once had
done me, saying that for it he had been terribly punished,
inasmuch as he had suffered far more than I. And still he
breathed no word of censure against his erring wife, who,
he said, was perhaps more sinned against than sinning, and
who, when the last great agony was upon her, had whispered
in his ear, as her white, clammy hand rested on the
flowing curls of little Rose, “Her mother, I know, will be
284she whose name she bears, and I am willing it should be
so.”
“And was she not right?” he continued, drawing me
closer to his side. “Will you not be the angel of my home,
the mother of my child?”
And then again he told me how much I had been loved;
how he had striven in vain to cast me from his heart, when
it was madness and sin to keep me there; and how, when
his horizon had been darkest with want and care, there was
still in the distance a ray of sunlight, the remembrance of
me, which had kept his soul from fainting. And now that it
was right for him to speak to me of love, would I not listen
and give him an opportunity to atone for the wrong he had
once done me? He paused for my reply. There was silence
in the room, and I counted each pulse of my beating heart
as it throbbed with the intensity of my excitement.
“Will not my darling answer me?” he said, and I felt
his breath upon my cheek, his lips upon my brow.
Not thus could I sit and tell him what duty bade me say.
So I moved away, and standing up before him, I said,
slowly, and distinctly, “Dr. Clayton, I loved you once, but
the time has gone by, the love has died out, and I would
not awaken it if I could.”
There was a firmness in my manner, a decision in the
tones of my voice, which startled him more than what I
said, and with a faint cry he too arose, and coming to
my side, said, “God forgive you, Rose, for the cruel words
you have uttered, but you cannot be in earnest.”
And then, with the firelight flickering over his pale face,
he plead with me “to think again, to revoke what I had
said, and not to send him away utterly hopeless and
wretched. The love I had felt for him once, though chilled
and dormant now, would bloom again, for he could bring it
285back to life, and I must be his; he could not live without
me. I need not decide then, that night,” he said, “he
would give me time,” and again he pressed for my answer,
which was the same as before; for, much as I pitied him,
there was between us a dark shadow, and the substance of
that shadow bore the form and features of Richard Delafield!
Sinking into a chair, he laid his head upon the table,
while, burying my face in the cushions of the sofa, I wept
bitterly, stealing occasional glances towards the bowed
form which, in its despair, gave no sign of life. There was
no acting there, for it was the grief of a strong man which I
saw. Without, the storm had ceased; the wind had died
away, and the rain no longer beat against the casement;
but within, there raged a wilder storm of human passions,
and as it swept over me in its full force, I cried, mentally,
“Ought I thus to deal with him? I loved him once, perhaps
I could do so again. I would at least try.” And,
rising up, I glided noiselessly to his side. He did not hear
me, and, for a time, I stood gazing down upon him, while I
thought of all he had suffered, and of his love for me, which
I could not doubt. The shadow no longer stood between
us; it was gone, and, strengthened by its absence, I laid
my hand upon his shoulder. He shuddered as if it had
been a serpent’s touch, but when I whispered in his ear,
“Look up, I have something to tell you,” he raised his
head, disclosing to my view a face over which years seemed
to have passed since last I had looked upon it.
“I will try,” I said, “but give me one day for reflection,
and to-morrow night you shall have your answer.”
As the clouds are dispersed by the soft rays of the sun, so
the shadows passed from his brow at my words, and clasping
me in his arms he wept over me, as Heaven grant I may
never see man weep again.
286The fire on the hearth had long since gone out. The
lamp was burning dimly, and the moon-beams came faintly
in through an eastern window ere I bade him good night,
and sought the solitude of my room, where my resolution almost
instantly gave way, for the shadow was there, and in
its presence I felt I would rather die than wed a man I did
not love.
“Oh, for a female friend with whom to counsel in my
need,” I said, as I nervously paced the room.
I thought of Mrs. Lansing. She was a woman—she
had been kind to me of late, and after a few moments’ reflection
I determined to ask her advice. This being settled, I
fell into a disturbed sleep, from which I did not wake until
the bell was ringing for breakfast. I met him at the table,
and my heart beat fast when I saw how anxiously he
scanned my haggard face.
“You are sick this morning,” he said, when at last we
were alone.
Taking my hand he felt my quickened pulse, and continued,
“This must not be. Calm yourself down, for I would
not wish you to answer me under all this excitement.”
Soon after this he left me, going down to the hotel where
he had first stopped on his arrival at W——. As soon as
he was gone I sought an interview with Mrs. Lansing, to
whom I confided the whole story of my former love for Dr.
Clayton, and of my feelings now, asking her to tell me as a
friend what I should do. I did not dare look her in the face
while I was talking, and when I had finished I waited with
downcast eyes for her answer, which was characteristic of a
woman who had never known what love was, save as she felt
it for her children.
“Do! Why, marry him of course. I should not hesitate
a moment, for ’tis not every girl in your circumstances who
287has an offer like that. He seems to be a perfect gentleman,—is
certainly very fine looking—is refined, polished, highly
educated, and has a good profession. What more can you
desire?”
“Love for him,” I replied; and she continued, “Pshaw!
That will come soon enough, depend upon it. There are
many happy marriages where one of the parties had at first
no particular affection for the other, as I myself can testify.
I respected Mr. Lansing, when I married him, but I did not
love him, and our union was, I am confident, far happier
than three-fourths of those where love is the ruling motive,
for in nine cases out of ten they grow sick of each other as
faults and peculiarities are brought to light, of whose existence
they had never dreamed. Take your own case for an
example. Suppose you had married Dr. Clayton when you
fancied him so much, you would undoubtedly have been disgusted
with him by this time, whereas, now that you know
he is fallible, you can safely link your destiny with his, feeling
sure that in good time the love you once had for him
will return.”
I knew there was some truth in this argument, but it failed
to convince me, and I remained silent until Mrs. Lansing
startled me with, “You do not of course love another?”
I was taken by surprise, and without a thought of the result,
I answered “I do.”
“And that other?” she continued, fixing her eyes upon
me.
I know not what possessed me, but a power I could not
resist impelled me to answer, “Is your brother.”
She did not send me from her presence with scorn and
loathing as I thought she would. Nay, she did not even
speak, but for a time stood mute with astonishment. As I
now recall that scene, I understand her better, and I know
288that the truth, just as it was, dawned upon her mind, and
suggested the falsehood which she uttered.
Coming closely to me, she said, “I cannot see why it is
that all my governesses have fallen in love with my brother,
yet such is the case. I did think, Miss Lee, that you were
an exception, but I find I am mistaken, which surprises me
greatly, inasmuch as he has never paid you the slightest attention,
and even if he had, I do not understand how you
could think him in earnest. For years the world has looked
upon his union with Ada as sure, and though for certain
reasons I have sometimes opposed it, I am anxious for it
now, and it is well that I am, for I suppose it is a settled
thing.”
I held my breath for fear I should lose a single word of
what she should say next. Perhaps she was unused to falsehoods.
Be that as it may, her voice trembled slightly and
she spoke hurriedly as she said, “They are engaged, and
have been ever since she went to Mobile, and they will probably
be married next autumn; hence, you see that the love
you have presumed to feel for him would be useless, even
were you his equal.”
She started to leave me, but turned back while she said,
“I trust that what I have told you will be kept a secret,
for Richard does not wish to have the matter discussed.”
I nodded assent, and the next moment I was alone with
my sorrow, which was far easier to bear now that uncertainty
was made sure. So long as there remained a lingering
hope that my love for Mr. Delafield might possibly be reciprocated,
I shrunk in horror from marrying another. But
now that hope was swept away, for I never thought of
doubting Mrs. Lansing’s word, and a kind of torpor crept
over me, suspending for a time both my judgment and my
will.
289“I will marry Dr. Clayton,” I said, and with that decision
came a feeling of gratified pride as I thought I should
thus prove to Richard how little I cared for him!
Ah, I knew not then that the heart I coveted enshrined
no image save that of “Rosa Lee,” for whom Richard Delafield
would almost have lain down his life, so great was the
love he bore her. He had readily divined the object of the
stranger’s visit, and the thought that it might be successful
was terrible. All the night long he, too, had been sleepless,
pacing the length and breadth of his spacious halls and murmuring
occasionally as, peering out into the darkness, he
saw the glimmering light from the windows of Cedar Grove,
“Oh, Rose, Rose, how can I give you up!”
Perhaps I am superstitious, but I cannot help fancying
that as often as these words rang out on the midnight air,
the shadow was over and around me. But alas! it faded and
I was left to do the rash act I meditated. With the coming
of morn Mr. Delafield grew calm, for he had resolved upon
an interview with Rosa Lee, who, if it were not too late,
should know how much he loved her, and perhaps (his
heart thrilled with joy as he thought it), perhaps she might
yet be won from that fancy of her childhood. But first he
would if possible, learn from his sister how far matters had
progressed. He had seldom imparted to her his secrets, but
he would speak to her now, for he could not keep silent.
She was seated at her work in her own room, when he
entered, and with a feeling of alarm at his pale, haggard
face, she started up, asking if he were ill. Motioning her
aside, he said, abruptly, “It’s of no use, Angeline, to deceive
you longer. I love Rosa Lee, and if it were not for
this accursed doctor, I should tell her so at once. Do you
know aught of his attentions? Has he come to seek her
for his wife?”
290Mrs. Lansing had now a double part to perform. The
falsehood she had told to Rosa, made it necessary that she
should tell another to her brother, which she did more
readily, for her proud nature revolted at the thoughts of
receiving her governess as her sister-in-law. So, thinking
any means excusable which would prevent so disgraceful a
catastrophe, she answered with well feigned surprise, “I am
astonished at you, brother—astonished that a Delafield
should stoop so low as to think of wedding a girl like Rosa
Lee. You cannot, I think, be in earnest; but if you are, I
am rejoiced that I have it in my power to tell you there is
no hope. I have just left Miss Lee, who has made me her
confident, asking if I thought it would be contrary to all
rules of propriety for her to marry Dr. Clayton so soon after
the death of his wife. It seems he has always preferred her,
and could you have heard her tell how much she loved him,
I am sure you would have no hope of winning her, even were
she your equal.”
The wicked woman paused, trembling at her own wickedness;
while her brother, burying his face in his hands, groaned
aloud. It was an hour of bitter trial, for Rosa Lee alone
had touched his heart, and could he give her up just as he
had found how dear she was to him? For a time the selfish
nature of the man prevailed, and then there came a moment
of calmer reflection: if Rose loved another, would it be
right for him to mar her happiness by intruding upon her
his affection? Should he not rather rejoice in knowing that
she was happy with the man she had chosen, and if, henceforth,
the world to him was dark and cheerless, might he
not occasionally gather a gleam of comfort from knowing
that no shadow was across her pathway! Thus he reasoned,
and when his sister ventured at last to say, “You will not
be foolish enough to talk with her,” he answered, “No—no—of
291coarse not;” then, with no visible sign of the fierce
storm which had swept over him, save the extreme pallor of
his face, he arose, and with a firm tread went back to his
home, unconscious of the tear-wet eyes which followed his
retreating footsteps, as from her window Rosa Lee watched
him with a despairing heart and benumbed faculties.
Not again that day was Cedar Grove gladdened by his
presence, and when next morning he came as was his wont,
I was the betrothed of Dr. Clayton, who, with joy beaming
in every look, sat by my side, talking to me of the pleasure
we should experience in our projected European tour, for we
were to visit the Old World, and he wished our marriage to
be consummated at once, so we could sail the last of June.
In a measure I had dealt candidly with him, frankly acknowledging
that the love I had felt for him in childhood
was gone, but saying, as was true, that I respected him—yes,
liked him, and if he was satisfied with that, I would be
unto him a faithful wife, hoping that the affection of former
years might ere long awake again in my heart. And he was
content to take me thus, blessing me for the utterance of
words which had made him so happy.
Involuntarily I shrank from him, for I knew I was undeserving
of such devotion, and my conscience smote me for
withholding from him the knowledge of my love for Richard
Delafield. But that was a secret I could not reveal, so I
kept it to myself, and with a kind of apathetic indifference
listened while he depicted in glowing colors the joyous future
which he saw before him when I should be indeed his
wife. He was going to New Orleans on business, which
would detain him for three or four weeks, and on his return
he asked that the ceremony might be performed, and I go
with him to Meadow Brook as his bride.
“No, not so soon,” I exclaimed. “Leave me my freedom
292a little longer;” but he only smiled as he waived aside
every objection and won from me a promise that if Mrs.
Lansing were willing, we would be married there as soon as
he should return from New Orleans, whither he would start
the next night.
Either by design or accident, Mrs. Lansing herself at that
moment entered the room, apologizing for the intrusion by
saying she wanted a book which lay upon the piano. Having
secured the volume, she was about leaving, when, glancing
at the doctor, she playfully remarked upon the happy
expression of his face, saying, she should judge his suit was
progressing, and adding that he had her good wishes for his
success. Emboldened by her familiarity, Dr. Clayton at once
preferred to her his wish that we might be made one under
the shadow of her roof; we would make no trouble, he
said, as we wished for no display, simply a quiet ceremony
at which no one should be present save herself, her children,
and her brother!
At the mention of him I started as if smitten by a heavy
blow, for I thought, “I cannot in his presence give myself
to another;” and I used all the arguments of which I was
mistress to induce Dr. Clayton to defer our marriage until
we reached Meadow Brook. But to this neither he nor
Mrs. Lansing would listen. Glad, that I was thus out of
her way, the latter seemed unusually kind, offering to give
me a bridal party as a “testimony of her respect.” Thus
was I silenced, while they arranged the matter as they
pleased, it being finally decided that the wedding was to
take place immediately after the doctor’s return, as he had
first proposed. So overcome and bewildered was I with the
exciting scenes through which I had passed, that, strange
as it may seem, I slept soundly that night, dreaming towards
day-break that I stood on the deck of a noble vessel,
293gazing upon a most glorious sunset, which, however, had
less charms for me than did the man at my side, whom I
called my husband, and whom I loved again as I had done
long ago, when with my face buried in the grass beneath
the old grape-vine I had wept over his inconstancy.
With the remembrance of that dream still haunting me,
it was quite natural that I should in the morning meet Dr.
Clayton with more cordiality of manner than I had yet
evinced towards him. Quickly perceiving the change, he
said, as he kissed my brow, “My Rose is learning to love
me, I see.”
And for a brief moment I, too, fancied that he was right—that
I should love him—nay, that I was beginning to love
him, when suddenly in the doorway appeared the form of
one, the very sight of whom curdled my blood for an instant
and then sent it bounding through my veins! It was Mr.
Delafield. He had nerved himself to see me, to stand face
to face with his rival, and bravely did he meet the trial,
bowing courteously to Dr. Clayton and smiling kindly down
upon me as he bade me good morning. I glanced at him
once and saw that his eyes were riveted upon the plain band
of gold, which encircled my fourth finger, confirming the
truth of what he had just heard from his sister. At last, as
if he would test his strength to the utmost, he took my
hand and said, as he slowly twirled the ring, which was
rather large, “And so you are going from us?”
I could not answer, nor was it needful that I should, for
without waiting a reply he placed my hand in that of Dr.
Clayton, and continued, “As a brother commits a dear
sister to the care of another, so commit I to your care my
Northern Rose, charging you to watch tenderly over her,
for ’tis not every one who winneth such a treasure.”
This was all he said; the next moment he was gone, and
294when, Dr. Clayton, drawing me to his side, told me how he
would treasure up the words of my friend; I involuntarily
shrank away, for the shadow was again around me, and turn
which way I would, it whispered to me of another love—another
heart, which I fain would have called my own.
That night Dr. Clayton left us, and the very morning
after his departure we were surprised by the appearance of
Ada, who came unexpectedly to us all. “She was tired of
living with that old fidgety Mrs. Johnson,” she said, “and
would rather come home.” Much as Mrs. Lansing liked
Ada, she would rather she had stayed away until I was
gone, for she was in constant dread lest the falsehood she
had told me concerning her brother’s engagement should in
some way be betrayed. But there was no help for it, and
as one sin always calls for another, so she must now conjure
up something with which to meet the emergency. Accordingly,
Ada was told that “somehow or other I had received
the impression that she was engaged to Mr. Delafield, and
that it was as well to let me think so; for though I probably
liked Dr. Clayton well enough, she (Mrs. Lansing)
fancied that I liked her brother better, and that if I
supposed there was the slightest chance of winning him, I
would not hesitate to discard the doctor.”
Very readily Ada fell in with the views of Mrs. Lansing,
who proposed further that they should continually ring in
my ears the praises of my affianced husband, of whose
virtues Ada was supposed to have heard from Mrs. Lansing;
while at the same time, I was to be interested as much as
possible in the preparations for my wedding, which was to
be quite a grand affair, and to which many of the village
people were to be invited. And so the days wore on,
during which I could hardly be said to exist, so little did I
realize what was passing around me. I dared not think,
295for if I did, the tumult of thought which crowded upon me
seemed turning my brain to fire, and when each morning I
awoke from an unrefreshing slumber, it was always with the
thought, “What is it? This load which oppresses me so?”—then,
as the stern reality came up before me, I would
bury my face in the pillow and ask that I might die, and
thus escape the living death which awaited me, and which
was now but a week or two in the distance.
CHAPTER XXIV. THE CRISIS.
296
It was the night before the one appointed for the bridal,
and in the solitude of her chamber, a young girl wept in the
utter hopelessness of despair. At the morrow’s early dawn he
would be there to claim her as his bride, and though he was
noble and good, there was in her heart no answering chord
of love, and she knew that without such love their union
would be unholy. Earnestly, and with many tears had she
striven to awaken again the deep affection she had felt for
him in the time gone by, but it could not be, and shudderingly
she thought of the long weary years when she should
be an unloving wife, bearing a crushed and aching heart,
wherein was enshrined the memory of one, of whom it would
soon be a sin to think.
On the table at her side lay her bridal dress, the gift of
Richard Delafield, who, without a shadow on his brow, or a
wavering in the tones of his voice, had asked her to accept
it as a token of the esteem he should ever feel for her!
Alas, poor Rose, as your tears fell like rain upon the
orange wreath which seemed to mock your woe, how little
did you dream of the anguish it cost the donor to say to
you the words he did, or that your sorrow was naught compared
to his, for you could weep, while to him this privilege
297was denied, and his was the hard task of enduring in silence
the burning pain which no tear-drop came to moisten.
Slowly the hours of night wore away, and as the moon
rose higher and higher in the heavens, her rays fell upon
the bowed form of Rosa, who, with clasped hands and
bloodless cheeks, sat just where first we saw her—praying—weeping—thinking,
and praying again, until at last there
came over her troubled spirit, a calm, which ere long,
resolved itself into a fixed determination. “She would tell
him all—how she loved Richard Delafield, and how, though
that love were hopeless, she could not call another her husband.”
And he would release her—she knew he would.
“But if he should not?” seemed whispered in her ear. For
an instant her heart stood still, and then she answered
aloud, “I will not do this great wickedness and sin against
both God and man.”
It was strange how calm this resolution made her.
Rising up from the crouching posture she had assumed in
the first abandonment of her grief, she walked to the open
window, where she stood gazing out upon the starry sky,
until at last, sick and faint with the sweet perfume of the
night air, she turned away, and shuddering, she knew not
why, sought her pillow. It was now the first of June, and
in that southern clime the air was already hot, sultry, and
laden with disease. For two weeks a fearful epidemic,
whose nature the oldest physicians did not understand, had
been raging in the towns adjoining, and many who in the
morning rose up full of life and vigor, were in the evening
no longer numbered among the living, so rapid was the
work of death. In great alarm the terrified inhabitants had
fled from place to place, but the destroyer was on their
tract and the “brain fever,” as it was termed, claimed
them for its victims.
298As yet, there had been no cases in W——, but the people
were in daily dread of its arrival, and a feeling of gloom
pervaded the village. Mrs. Lansing, on the contrary,
though usually alarmed, even at the mention of a contagious
disease, expressed no fear, and went on with the preparations
for the party, unconscious of the dark cloud
hovering near. But when on the morning succeeding the
night of which we have spoken, she heard, in passing Rosa’s
door the sound of some one talking incoherently, while at
the same time a negro girl came rushing out, exclaiming,
“The Lord help us—young Miss has now got the brain
fever, and gone ravin’ mad,” she fled in wild alarm to the
farthest extremity of the building, and gathering her
frightened children together, with Ada, around her, she
called to the terrified servants from the window, bidding
them go for her brother and tell him as he valued his life
not to venture near the infected room, but to hasten with
all speed to her. And there, trembling, weeping, and
wringing her hands in fear, the selfish, cold-hearted woman
stayed, while parched with fever and thirst, the suffering girl
lay moaning in her pain; now asking for water to cool her
burning brain, and again clasping her thin, white hands
convulsively upon her brow, as if to still its agonized
throbbings.
But one there was who did not forget. In her excitement
Mrs. Lansing failed to notice the absence of little Jessie, who
going fearlessly to the bedside of her beloved teacher, gently
bathed the aching head, and administered the cooling draught,
while with childish love she kissed the ashen lips, and smoothed
back the long tresses which floated over the pillow. In the hall
below there was the sound of footsteps, and the bridegroom’s
voice was heard, asking for his bride, but his cheek blanched
to a marble whiteness when told that she was dying in the
299chamber above. In a moment he had her in his arms—his
precious Rose—dying—dying—he believed, for he, too, had
heard of the strange disease, and he thought there was no
hope. With a bitter cry, he bent over the unconscious girl,
who knew him not, for the light of reason was obscured and
darkness was upon her vision.
“Can nothing be done? Is there no help?” he exclaimed
wildly, and little Jessie, awed by his grief, answered,
as she laid her soft, white hand on Rosa’s forehead, “God
can help her, and maybe Uncle Dick can. I mean to go for
him,” and gliding noiselessly from the room, she was soon on
her way to Sunny Bank, looking, with her golden curls floating
over her bare white shoulders, as is she were indeed an
angel of mercy.
Alone in his library sat Richard Delafield, his arms resting
upon the table, and his face buried in his hands. All the
night long he had sat there thus, musing sadly of the future
when she would be gone, and he should be alone. Why had
she crossed his path—that little, humble girl, and why had
he been permitted to love her so madly, or to dream of a
time when he could call her “his own, his Rose, his wife.”
Again and again he repeated those words to himself, and
then as he thought whose she would be when another sun
should have set, he groaned aloud, and in despairing tones
cried out, “How can I give her up!”
The sun had risen, and, struggling through the richly curtained
window, fell upon his bowed head, but he did not
heed it. He was sleeping at last, and in his dreams another
than Dr. Clayton had claimed Rose for his bride, even
Death, and without a tear he laid her in her coffin, and buried
her where the soft sighing cedar and the whispering pine
300would overshadow her grave. From that dream he was
roused by Jessie, who shrieked in his ear, “Wake, Uncle
Dick, and come. Miss Lee is dying with the fever, and there
is nobody to help her.”
For a time the selfish part of Richard Delafield’s nature
gained the ascendant, and he said aloud, “Thank God!
Rather thus than the bride of another.”
Still this feeling did not prevent him from action, and with
a firm step and composed manner he went with Jessie to
Cedar Grove, going immediately to Rosa’s chamber, where,
for a moment, he stood appalled at the scene before him.
She had fearfully changed since last he saw her, for the disease
had advanced with rapid strides, and now utterly insensible,
and white as the wintry snow, she lay with her
head thrown back, and her lips apart, while her hands nervously
picked at the bed-clothes around her! Many a time
had Dr. Clayton heard that this was a sure omen of death,
and though he had ever laughed at it as an old woman’s
whim, he shuddered now as he saw it in her, and bowing his
head upon the pillow, he wept like a child. For a moment
Richard Delafield stood gazing upon the apparently dying
girl and the weeping man, who seemed wholly incapable of
action; then rousing himself, he went in quest of the black
women, commanding them in a voice they dared not disobey
to come at once to the sick-room. He had heard that
nothing but violent and continual perspiration had as yet
been of any avail in such extreme cases, and calmly giving
orders to that effect, he himself assisted while the hemlock
and the bottles of hot water were applied, then, administering
a powerful tonic, he bade Jessie go for her mother, while
he took his station at the bedside to watch the result.
Quieted in a measure by the cool demeanor of his companion,
Dr. Clayton, too, arose, and after hurriedly pacing
301the room, resumed his post, and there on each side of Rose
they stood, those two men, the one with his fair handsome
face stained with tears, praying earnestly that she might
live; while the other, with dark, lowering countenance and
wrinkled brow, stood with folded arms, and firmly compressed
lips, struggling to subdue the evil passion which
whispered, “Let her die! There will be a comfort in weeping
over her grave, and knowing that she sleeps there in all
her maiden purity.”
In the meantime Jessie had been missed, and a servant dispatched
to find her. But this the woman failed to do as she
was then at Sunny Bank, and Mrs. Lansing was about venturing
to go in quest of her, when she appeared with her
uncle’s message, saying, “she knew Miss Lee was dying, she
looked so dreadfully.”
“Jessie—child,” screamed the affrighted Mrs. Lansing,
shrinking from the little girl as if she had been a loathsome
thing, “Have you been there—in the room?”
Without any attempt at concealment, Jessie told what she
had done, and when her mother exclaimed, “You are a
dead child,” she answered fearlessly, “I am not afraid to
die.”
Just then the negro, who had been sent to the village for
the family physician, returned, bringing the news that the
fever had broken out there the night before, and that in one
family two were already dead, while a third was thought to
be dying. In the utmost dismay, Mrs. Lansing now announced
her intention of leaving the place at once and fleeing for safety
to her brother’s plantation, which was distant about twelve
miles.
“And leave Miss Lee alone? oh, mother!” said Jessie,
beginning to cry, while Halbert, frightened as he was, remonstrated
against the unfeeling desertion.
302But Mrs. Lansing was determined—“she couldn’t help her
at all if she stayed,” she said. “And the colored women
would do all that was necessary; it wasn’t like leaving her
alone with Dr. Clayton, for there were a dozen able-bodied
females in the house to wait upon her.”
“And if she dies?” suggested Jessie; but her mother
would not hear to reason, and urged on by Ada, who was
no less frightened than herself, she ordered out the travelling
carriage, which soon stood before the door.
She would fain have had her brother accompany her, but
she knew it was useless to propose it. Still she would see
him before she went, and her waiting-maid was sent to bring
him.
“I’ll go. Let me go,” said Jessie, and ere her mother
could detain her, she was half-way there.
Entering the room on tiptoe, she gave her uncle her
mother’s message, and then stealing up to Rose, wound her
arms round her neck, and laying her soft, warm cheek caressingly
against the white, thin face of her teacher, wept
her last adieu. They would never, never meet again, for
ere the summer flowers were faded, one would be safely in
the bosom of the Good Shepherd, who would lead her in
green pastures, and beside the still waters of the better
land.
“Bury her under the tall magnolia, a little ways from
father,” was Jessie’s last injunction to Dr. Clayton, whose
tears burst forth afresh, for not till then had he thought
how he must leave her alone in that far south land—many
miles away from her native hills, and that to him would be
denied the solace of weeping over her early grave.
It was in vain that Mr. Delafield attempted to dissuade
303his sister from going. She would not listen, for their lives,
she said, were all endangered by remaining in town, and as
several other families were going to leave, she should follow
their example—then bidding him hasten to them the moment
Rose was dead, she entered her carriage and was driven
rapidly away, followed by Halbert and two or three negroes
on horseback. Unfeeling as this proceeding seemed to
Richard, he still experienced a sensation of relief at the absence
of the family, and thinking they would probably be
safer at “The Pines” than at Cedar Grove, he returned to
the chamber above, where Rose still lay, in the same deathlike
unconsciousness, perfectly still save when a movement
of the head, or a faint moan, told how she suffered. Everything
had been done for her which could be done, and now
there was naught for them to do but to wait and watch,
which they did in perfect silence—Dr. Clayton, with his
head bowed upon the pillow, while Mr. Delafield leaned
against the wall, with compressed lips, and eyes dark as
midnight, fastened upon the white, still face before him.
The clock in the hall struck the hour of eleven, and then,
with a feeble moan, the sick girl withdrew her hand from
beneath the covering, and when the stern man took it within
his own he forced back an exclamation of joy, for it was
moist with perspiration! There was hope, and his first impulse
was to tell the good news to his companion, but the
demon, which all the morning he had hugged to his bosom,
whispered, “not now—let him suffer yet a little longer!”
Soon, however, casting this thought aside as unworthy of
him, he said, “Look up, Dr. Clayton, she is better. She
may live. See!” and lifting the damp hair from her
brow, he pointed to the dewy drops which stood thickly
upon it.
“Thank Heaven!” was Dr. Clayton’s exclamation, and
304bending down, he said, “Rose, my precious Rose—she will
live, and you have saved her,” he continued advancing towards
the dark statue, whose hand he pressed to his lips.
“To you the credit is due, for you worked when despair had
rendered me powerless to do, but now I am strong. I am
myself again, and if I have any skill it shall be exerted in
her behalf.”
There was a curl on Richard Delafield’s lip—a blur before
his eyes, and an icy chill at his heart, which prevented him
from answering. Bitter were the thoughts which crowded
upon him, and which he strove to put away. If she lived,
would it not be in a measure owing to the efficient means he
had employed—and why should he wish to save her? Would
he not rather see her dead? It was an evil spirit which
counselled with him thus, but ere long the noble nature of
Richard Delafield conquered, and when at last her eyes unclosed,
and turned towards Dr. Clayton, whose name she
breathed, asking for her bridal dress, he looked on calmly
while his rival kissed her again and again, telling her she
should yet wear it and be his bride, but when he saw how
she shuddered at these words, feebly answering, “No, no.
Have they not told you that I cannot be your bride, for
another has come between us?” a thrill of joy ran through his
frame, but soon passed away as he thought it was merely the
vagary of a disordered mind.
All that day and night they stood over her, applying the remedies
said to be most efficient in cases of the kind, and
when the next morning came she was unquestionably better,
though still in great danger from a tendency of the disease
to the lungs, which, however, was less to be feared than its return
to the brain. Very carefully and tenderly they watched
her, and had not Mr. Delafield been blinded by her supposed
love for another, he must have seen how much more readily
305she took things from him than from Dr. Clayton, following
him with her eyes whenever he moved away, and seeming
much more quiet when he was at her side. By the close of
the third day she was nearly free from the brain fever, but
much fear was felt by Dr. Clayton lest it should assume the
typhoid form, which it did ere long, and then for three
weeks she raved in wild delirium, driving Richard Delafield
from her presence, shuddering when he came near, and begging
of Dr. Clayton, whom she called her brother Charlie,
“to send the black man with his ugly face away.”
This state of affairs was almost intolerable to Richard,
who, if he had loved Rose before, felt that she was tenfold
dearer to him now, and so, though he dared not come in her
sight when awake, he watched by her when she slept, standing
over her hour after hour, and enduring with almost
superhuman strength the care which Dr. Clayton could
hardly be said to share, so absorbed was he in grief at
the thoughts of losing her at last. Thus the days wore
on until her frenzy abated, and she sank into a state of
apathy from which nothing could rouse her, not even the
sight of Richard Delafield, from whom she no longer shrank,
but for whom she seemed to have conceived a kind of pity,
asking him sometimes “if he hated her because she did not
love him, and telling him how hard she had tried to do so,
but could not, and that he must go away and leave her
alone!” And all this while it never occurred to him that
she fancied he was Dr. Clayton, though he did marvel at her
never mentioning her affianced husband, in whose arms she
would fall asleep, and whose hand she would kiss, calling
him Charlie, and asking if he had come to carry her
home.
Matters were in this state when one day, towards the
dusk of evening, he was surprised by the appearance of
306Halbert, who said that the cholera, had broken out at the
Pines, and he must come immediately, adding further, that
his mother and Ada had both had it, that several of the
blacks were dead, and that the man, who two days before
had been sent to Cedar Grove, had died upon the road.
Greatly alarmed for the safety of his people, Mr. Delafield
started at once for the Pines, whither, in another chapter,
we will follow him.
CHAPTER XXV. THE ANGEL OF THE PINES.
307
The unexpected arrival of their master’s sister and her
cortége at “The Pines,” as Mr. Delafield’s plantation was
called, produced quite a sensation among the blacks, who
hastened to receive their guests with many demonstrations
of joy, rather more affected than real, for Mrs. Lansing was
not very popular with them. Halbert and Jessie, on the
contrary, were general favorites among the servants, who
thought them little less than angels, particularly Jessie,
who, with her sweet, young face, laughing eyes, and wavy
hair, flitted like a sunbeam from cabin to cabin, asking
after this old Aunty, or that old Uncle, and screaming with
delight when in one hut she found three babies, all of an age,
and belonging to the same mother, who boasted of having
given to her master “fifteen as likely girls and boys as there
were in Georgy.”
As yet the triplets had no names, but the arrival of the
family suggested a new idea to Hannah, who, seating herself
by Jessie, proposed that they be called, “Richard
Delafield, Ada Montrose, and Jessie Lansing.”
With the first and last the little girl was well pleased,
but she objected to the middle name, and taking one of the
infants upon her lap, she told the story of her beloved
teacher, who was dying at Cedar Grove, and asked that
308the child she held might be called for her. So, baptized
by Jessie’s tears, which fell like rain upon its dark and
wrinkled face, the babe was christened “Rosa Lee.”
The house which Mrs. Lansing termed her country residence
(for she always spoke of her brother’s possessions as
her own), was a large, double log building, containing
nothing very elegant in the way of furniture, but still presenting
an air of neatness and comfort; for Aunt Dinah,
who had charge of it, prided herself upon keeping it neat
and clean, as her master was likely to come upon her at any
time without warning, and she liked to impress him with
her rare qualifications as housekeeper. With Mrs. Lansing,
however, she was less pleased, but still as the sister of
“Mars’r Richard,” she was entitled to consideration, and
now in high turban, and all the dignity of her position, the
old lady bustled about from room to room, jingling her keys,
kicking the dogs, cuffing the woolly pate of any luckless wight
who chanced to be in her way, and occasionally stooping
down to kiss little Jessie, who, being of rather a domestic
turn, followed her from place to place, herself assisting in
spreading the supper table, which, with its snowy cloth, corn
cake, iced milk, hot coffee, and smoking steaks, soon presented
a most inviting aspect.
Relieved of their fears and thinking themselves beyond
the reach of danger, Mrs. Lansing and Ada gave themselves
up to the enjoyment of the hour, talking and laughing
gaily, without a thought of the sick girl they had left
behind, and who that night was to have been a bride.
Once, indeed, when after sunset they were assembled upon
the rude piazza, Ada spoke of her, wondering if she were
dead, and how long it would be ere Dr. Clayton would
marry another! Such is the world, to which Ada formed
no exception, for how often do we hear the future companion
309of a broken-hearted man selected, even before the
wife of his bosom is removed forever from his sight!
For a long time Mrs. Lansing sat there with Ada and
her children, talking on indifferent subjects and occasionally
congratulating herself that they were beyond reach of the
fever, unless, indeed, Jessie had contracted it by her foolish
carelessness! On her lap rested the little golden head of
the child, who was humming snatches of “The Happy
Land,” a favorite song which her uncle had taught her, and
which she had often sung with her teacher, asking numerous
questions concerning the better world, where
“Saints in glory stand,
Bright, bright as day,”
and wondering if, when she died, Jesus would take her there
to sing,
“Worthy is our Saviour King.”
Very naturally, now, her thoughts reverted to her governess,
and as she listened to the whispering wind sighing
through the trees, she fancied it was the voice of Rose bidding
her, “come to the Happy Land.” Sweet little Jessie,
it was the voices of angel children, which you heard thus
calling through the pines; for from their shining ranks one
beauteous form was missing, and they would fain allure it
back to its native sky.
Come I now to the saddest part of my story. Beneath the
evergreens of the sunny South is a little mound, over which
the shining stars keep watch, and the cypress spreads its
long green boughs, while the children of the plantation,
dark browed though they are, tread softly near that grave,
which they daily strew with flowers, speaking in low tones
of “the Angel of the Pines,” as they term the fair young
310girl, who passed so suddenly from their midst. It was now
nearly five weeks since Mrs. Lansing had fled from the
pestilence which walked at noonday, and though it had in
a measure abated in the village, there were still frequent
cases, and she would not have deemed it safe to return,
even if typhoid fever, which she feared nearly as much, had
not been in her own house. So there was no alternative
but to stay, uncomfortable though she was, for the weather
was intensely hot, and she missed many of the luxuries of
her home. Still it was healthy there, and this in a measure
reconciled her to remain. Occasionally, it is true, she heard
rumors of the cholera, on some distant plantation, but it
seldom visited the pine regions—it would not come there;
she was sure of that; and secure in this belief, she rested in
comparative quiet, while each day the heat became more
and more intense. The sun came up red, fiery, and heated
like a furnace; the clouds gave forth no rain; the brooks
were dried up; the leaves withered upon the trees, while
the air was full of humming insects, which at night fed upon
their helpless, sleeping victims.
At the close of one of these scorching, sultry days, Mrs.
Lansing and Ada sat upon the piazza, panting for a breath
of pure, cool air. At the side of each stood a negro girl,
industriously fanning their mistresses, who scolded them as
if they were to blame, because the air thus set in motion
was hot and burning as the winds which blow over the
great desert of Sahara. As they sat there thus, an old
man came up from the negro quarters, saying “his woman
done got sick wid the cramps,” and he wished “his mistis
jest come down see her.”
But Mrs. Lansing felt herself too languid for exertion of
any kind, and telling Uncle Abel that she herself was fully as
sick as his wife, who was undoubtedly feigning, she sent him
311back with a sinking heart to the rude cabin, where his old
wife lay, groaning aloud whenever the cramps, as she termed
them, seized her. Scarcely, however, had he entered the
low doorway, when a fairy form came flitting down the narrow
pathway, her white dress gleaming through the dusky
twilight, and her golden hair streaming out behind. It was
little Jessie, who, from her crib, had heard her mother’s
refusal to accompany Uncle Abel, and, stealing away unobserved,
she had come herself to see Aunt Chloe, with whom
she was quite a favorite.
Unaccustomed as Jessie was to sickness, she saw at a
glance that this was no ordinary case, and, kneeling down
beside the negress, who lay upon the floor, she took her
head upon her lap, and gently pushing back, beneath the
gay turban, the matted, grizzly hair, she asked where the
pain was.
“Bress de sweet chile,” answered Chloe, “you can’t
tache me with the pint of a cambric needle whar ’tain’t,
and seems ef ebery jint in me was onsoderin’ when de cramp
is on.”
As if to verify the truth of this remark, she suddenly bent
up nearly double, and rolling upon her face, groaned aloud.
At this moment a negro, who had gained some notoriety
among his companions as a physician, came in, and after
looking a moment at the prostrate form of Chloe, who was
now vomiting freely, he whispered a word which cleared
the cabin in a moment, for the mention of cholera had a
power to curdle the blood of the terrified blacks, who fled
to their own dwellings, where they cried aloud, and praying,
some of them, “that de Lord would have mercy on
’em, and take somebody else to kingdom come, ef he must
have a nigger anyway.”
Utterly fearless, Jessie stayed by, and when John, or as he
312was more familiarly known, “Doctor,” proposed going for
her mother, she answered, “No, no; Uncle Abel has been
for her once, but she won’t come; and if she knows it is
cholera, she’ll take me away.”
This convinced the “Doctor,” who proceeded to put in
practice the medical skill which he had picked up at intervals,
and which was considerable for one of his capacity.
By this time, a few of the women, more daring than the
rest and curious to know the fate of their companion, ventured
near the door, where they stood gazing wonderingly
upon the poor old creature, who was fast floating out upon
the broad river of death. It was a most violent attack,
and its malignity was increased by a quantity of unripe
fruit which she had eaten that morning.
“Will somebody make a pra’r?” she said, feebly, as she
felt her life fast ebbing away. “Abel, you pray for poor
Chloe,” and her glassy eyes turned beseechingly towards her
husband, who was noted at camp-meetings for praying the
loudest and longest of any one.
But his strength had left him now, and kissing the shrivelled
face of his dying wife, he said, “’Scuse me, Chloe; de
sperrit is willin’, but de flesh part is mighty weak and
shaky like. Miss Jessie, you pray!” he continued, as the
child came to his side.
“Yes, honey, pray,” gasped Chloe; and, kneeling down,
the little girl began the Lord’s Prayer, occasionally interspersing
it with a petition that “God would take the departing
soul to heaven.”
“Yes, dat’s it,” whispered Chloe; “dat’s better dan all
dem fine words ’bout kingdom come and daily bread; dey’ll
do for white folks, but God bress old Chloe, de thing for
niggers to die on.”
“Sing, honey, sing,” she said, at last; and, mingled with
313the lamentations of the blacks, there arose on the evening
air the soft notes of the Happy Land, which Jessie sang,
bending low towards Chloe, who, when the song was ended,
clasped her in her arms, and calling her “a shining angel,”
went, we trust, to the better land, where bondage is unknown,
and the slave is equal to his master.
Loud and shrill rose the wail of the negroes, increasing in
violence when it was known that into another cabin the
pestilence had entered, prostrating a boy, who, in his agony,
called for Jessie and mas’r Richard, thinking they could
save him. Late as it was, Mrs. Lansing, Ada, and Lina,
were still upon the piazza, which was far more comfortable
than their sleeping-room, where they supposed both Halbert
and Jessie were safely in bed. They were just thinking of
retiring, when suddenly the midnight stillness was broken
by a cry so shrill that Mrs. Lansing started to her feet, asking
what it was.
From her couch by the open door, Aunt Dinah arose, and
going out a few rods, listened to the sound, which seemed
to come from the negro quarters, whither, at her mistress’s
command, she bent her steps. But a short time elapsed ere
she returned with the startling news that, “the cholera was
thar—that Chloe was dead, and another one had got it and
was vomucking all over the night dress of Miss Jessie, who
was holdin’ his head.”
Wholly overcome with fright, Mrs. Lansing fainted, and
was borne to her room, where, for a time, she remained
unconscious, forgetful of Jessie, who stayed at the quarters
long after midnight, ministering to the wants of the sick,
of which, before morning, there were five, while others
showed symptoms of the rapidly spreading disease. As
soon as Mrs. Lansing returned to consciousness, she sent for
Jessie, who came reluctantly, receiving her mother’s reproof
314in silence, and falling away to sleep as calmly as if she had
not just been looking upon death, whose shadow was over
and around her.
Early the next morning, a man was sent in haste to
Cedar Grove, which he never reached, for the destroyer
met him on the road, and in one of the cabins of a neighboring
plantation, he died, forgetting, in the intensity of
his sufferings, the errand on which he had been sent; and
as those who attended him knew nothing of Mrs. Lansing’s
being at the Pines, it was not until the second day after the
appearance of the cholera that she learned the fate of her
servant. In a state bordering almost upon distraction, she
waited for her brother, shuddering with fear whenever a
new case was reported to her, and refusing to visit the sufferers,
although among them were some who had played
with her in childhood; and one, an old grey-haired man,
who had saved her from a watery grave, when on the
Savannah River she had fallen overboard. But there was
no place for gratitude in her selfish heart, and the miserable
creatures were left to die alone, uncheered by the presence
of a pale face, save little Jessie, who won her mother’s
reluctant consent to be with them, and who, all the day
long, went from cabin to cabin, soothing the sick and dying
by her presence, and emboldening others by her own intrepidity.
Towards sunset, Mrs. Lansing herself was seized with the
malady, and with a wild shriek, she called on Ada to help
her; but that young lady was herself too much intimidated
to heed the call, and in an adjoining room she sat with
camphor at her nose and brandy at her side, until a fierce,
darting pain warned her that she, too, was a victim. No
longer afraid of Mrs. Lansing, she made no resistance when
borne to the same apartment, where for hours they lay,
315bemoaning the fate which had brought them there, and
trembling as they thought of the probable result.
On Mrs. Lansing’s mind there was a heavy load, and once,
when the cold perspiration stood thickly upon her face, she
ordered Jessie and Dinah from the room, while she confessed
to Ada the sin of which she had been guilty in deceiving
both her brother and Rose.
“It was a wicked falsehood,” said she, “and if you survive
me, you must tell them so, will you?”
Ada nodded in token that she would, and then, thinking
her own conscience might be made easier by a similar confession,
she told how she had thought to injure Rose in Mr.
Delafield’s estimation, and also of the blister, which had
drawn on Hagar’s back instead of her own! This done,
the two ladies felt greatly relieved, and as the cholera in
their case had been induced mostly by fear, it began ere
long to yield to the efficient treatment of Dinah, who to her
housekeeping qualities added that of being a skillful nurse.
Towards morning they were pronounced decidedly better,
and as Jessie was asleep and Dinah nodding in her chair,
Mrs. Lansing lifted her head from her pillow, saying to Ada,
“If you please, you needn’t tell what I told you last night,
when I thought I was going to die!”
Ada promised to be silent, and after winning a similar
promise from Mrs. Lansing, they both fell asleep, nor woke
again until the sun was high up in the heavens. So much
for a sick-bed repentance!
That day was hotter and more sultry than any which had
preceded it; and about the middle of the afternoon little
Jessie came to Dinah’s side and laying her head upon her
lap complained of being both cold and tired. Blankets were
wrapped around her, but they brought to her no warmth,
for her blood was chilled by approaching death, and when
316at dusk the negroes asked why she came not among them,
they were told that she was dying! With streaming eyes
they fell upon their knees, and from those humble cabins
there went up many a fervent prayer for God to spare the
child. But it could not be; she was wanted in heaven; and
when old Uncle Abel, who had also been ill, crept on his
hands and knees to her bedside, calling upon her name, she
did not know him, for unconsciousness was upon her, and in
infinite mercy she was spared the pain usually attendant upon
the disease.
Almost bereft of reason and powerless to act, Mrs. Lansing
sat by her child, whose life was fast ebbing away. In
a short time all the negroes, who were able, had come to
the house, their dark faces stained with tears and expressive
of the utmost concern, as they looked upon the little girl,
who lay so white and still, with her fair hair floating
over the pillow and her waxen hands folded upon her
bosom.
“Sing to me, Uncle Dick,” she said, at last, “sing of the
Happy Land not far away;” but Uncle Dick was not there,
and they who watched her were too much overcome with
grief to heed her request.
Slowly the hours wore on, and the spirit was almost home,
when again she murmured, “Sing of the Happy Land;”
and as if in answer to her prayer, the breeze, which all the
day long had been hushed and still, now sighed mournfully
through the trees, while a mocking-bird in the distance
struck up his evening lay; and amid the gushing melody of
that wondrous bird of song and the soft breathing notes of
the whispering pines, little Jessie passed to the “Happy
Land,” which to those who watched the going out of her
short life, seemed, indeed, “not far away.”
With a bitter cry the bereaved mother fell upon her
317face and wept aloud, saying, in her heart, “My God, my
God, why have I thus been dealt with?”
In the distance was heard the sound of horses’ feet, and
ere long her brother was with her, weeping as only strong
men weep, over the lifeless form which returned him no answering
caress. She had been his idol, and for a moment he,
too, questioned the justice of God in thus afflicting him.
“Jessie is gone, Rosa is going, and I shall be left alone,”
he thought. “What have I done to deserve a chastisement
like this?”
Soon, however, he grew calmer, and saying, “It is well;”
he tenderly kissed the lips and brow of the beautiful child,
who seemed to smile on him even in death; then going out
among his people, he comforted them as best he could, dropping
more than one tear to the memory of those who they
told him were dead, and who numbered eight in all. At a
short distance from the house was a tall cypress where Jessie
had often sported, and where now was a play-house, built
by her hands but a few days before. There, by the light
of the silvery moon, they made her a grave, and when the
sun was up, its rays fell upon the pile of earth which hid
from view the sunny face and soft blue eyes of Jessie, “the
Angel of the Pines.”
CHAPTER XXVI. RETURN.
318
For nearly a week after Jessie’s death, Mr. Delafield remained
at the Pines, doing whatever he could for the comfort
of his servants, and as at the end of that time the disease
had wholly disappeared, he returned to Cedar Grove,
accompanied by his sister and Ada, who had learned by sad
experience that the dangers from which we flee, are oftentimes
less than those to which we go. They found Rose better,
but still quite low, and as the fever had not entirely
left her, neither Mrs. Lansing nor Ada ventured near her
room, but shut themselves in their own apartment, where
the former received the sympathy of her friends, which in
this case was truly sincere, for Jessie was universally beloved
and the tidings of her death carried sorrow to many
hearts.
Over Dr. Clayton a change had come. The hopeful,
happy expression of his face was gone, and in its place was
a look of utter hopelessness which at first roused Richard’s
fears lest Rose should be worse, and in much alarm he asked
if it were so.
“No, no,” answered the doctor, while a shadow of pain
passed over his handsome features; “she will live.”
Then hurrying to the window he looked out to hide his
tears from him whom he knew to be his rival, and who, now
319that he was unobserved, bent over the sleeping Rose, kissing
her wasted cheek and mourning for her as he thought
how she would weep when she learned the fate of her favorite.
Oh, could he have known the whole, how passionately
would he have clasped her to his bosom and held her there
as his own, his darling Rose! But it was not yet to be, and
he must bide his time.
She had seemed greatly relieved at his absence, and on
the second day after his departure, she called Dr. Clayton
to her side, fancying him to be her brother Charlie. Taking
his hands in hers, she told him the whole story of her
trials; how she had tried to bring back the old affection of
her childhood, but could not because of the love she had for
Richard Delafield.
“Oh, Charlie,” she exclaimed, “he would forgive me, I
know, if he knew how much I suffered during those terrible
days, when I thought of giving my hand without my heart.
The very idea set my brain on fire and my head has ached,
oh, so hard since then, but it’s over now, for I conquered at
last, and on the night before the wedding, I resolved to tell
him all, how I could not and would not marry him. But a
dark cloud, which seemed like the rushing of mighty waters,
came over me, and I don’t know where I am, nor what has
happened, only he has been here, hanging like a shadow over
my pillow, where sat another shadow tenfold blacker, which
he said was death; but grim and hideous as it was, I preferred
it to a life with him, when my whole soul was given
to another. He, too, was here occasionally, and in his presence
the shadow grew less and less, while his voice called
me back from the deep darkness in which I was groping.
Once, when I was almost home, so near that I heard the
song which little Jamie sings—Jamie, who died so long ago—he
laid his cool hand upon my forehead, which was wet
320with the waters of the rolling river, and I heard him say to
some one, ‘Look up; she is better, she will live.’ The next
moment he was gone, but I struggled with the waves and
floated back to the shore, where, though I could not see
him, his hand was stretched out to save me, and for a time
he stood between me and Dr. Clayton, who, when he thought
nobody heard him, whispered in my ear, ‘my bride—my
own.’ But from my inmost soul I answered, ‘Never, never,’
while I looked again towards the river which is still in
sight, though slowly receding from view.”
She paused a moment and then continued: “When I am
dead, Charlie, you must tell him how it was, and ask him to
forgive and think with pity of poor little Rose, who would
have loved him if she could. If he will not listen—if he
still persists in marrying me, tell him I would rather die ten
thousand deaths than wed a man I do not love, and then his
pride will come to his aid. But not a word of this to Mr.
Delafield, Charlie, never let him know how I loved him. My
affection is not returned, and he would despise me—would
never visit my grave or think with pity of one who died so
far away from home.”
Then followed a message for the loved ones of Meadow
Brook, but this Dr. Clayton did not hear. Perfectly paralyzed,
he had listened to her story until his reason seemed in
danger of leaving him, and long ere she had finished he
knew he must give her up—but not to death; and as Richard
Delafield had done, so he, in this his hour of bitter trial,
felt how much rather he would see her in her coffin than the
wife of another. Then in his ear the tempter whispered,
“Why need these things be? She is not yet out of danger.
A little relaxation of care on your part, and Richard Delafield
will never call her his.”
Only for a moment, however, did Dr. Clayton listen, and
321then laying his head upon the pillow beside that of Rose,
who, wearied with her story, had fallen asleep, he wept as
he had never wept before, not even when he saw creeping
over her the shadow of death. Turn which way he would,
there was naught before him save the darkness of despair;
and as wave after wave broke over him, his mind went backward
to the time when she might have been his—when he
could have gathered her to his bosom—and in piteous accents
he cried aloud, “My punishment is greater than I can
bear.”
But as the fiercest storm soonest expends its fury, so he
ere long grew calm and capable of sober, serious thought.
Rosa Lee was very dear to him, and to have possessed her
love, he would have given almost everything; but as that
could not be, ought he to stand in the way of her happiness?
He knew she was deceived, for he remembered many
things he had seen in Mr. Delafield, which, though he had
not thought of it then, convinced him now that her affection
was reciprocated; and should he not tell her so, and at the
same time disclose to Richard the true state of affairs?
Rosa’s quiet, unobtrusive, and rather reserved manner had
misled Richard, no doubt, or he would long ere this have
declared his love.
“Yes, God helping me, I will do right,” he said aloud,
clasping his hands over his feverish brow. “I will watch
by her until his return, and then committing her to his care
I will leave her forever.”
There was a movement at his side—Rose was dreaming,
and she uttered the name of Richard, while, with a shiver,
the doctor stopped his ears and shut out the hated sound. In
a moment she awoke and asked for water. It was brought,
but he no longer supported her in his arms—no longer
smoothed back the tangled curls from her brow, or kissed
322her white lips. “She is not mine, and it were wrong to caress
her now,” he thought, and his tears fell upon her face
as he laid her gently back upon the pillow. Wonderingly
she gazed upon him, and lifting her hand, wiped his tears
away, asking why he wept.
“Heaven help me from going mad,” he exclaimed aloud,
as he walked to the window, where for a long time he stood,
trying to school himself for the part he was to act.
He succeeded at last, and never did a tender brother
watch more carefully over a darling sister than did he over
her during the few days which elapsed ere Mr. Delafield’s
return. He was alone with her when he came, and with
comparative calmness he greeted his rival, who, as we have
before stated, was surprised at the change in his looks.
That night, in the solitude of his chamber the doctor penned
two letters; one for Rose and the other for Richard. In substance,
the contents of each were much the same, for he told
them all he had heard from Rose, and how, though it broke
his heart to do so, he had given her up. “Deal very, very
gently with her,” he wrote to Mr. Delafield, “for never was
there a purer, gentler being, or one more worthy of your
love than she. Then take her, and when your cup is overflowing
with happiness, think sometimes of one, who, henceforth
will be a lonely, wretched man.”
The letters being written he put them away until such
time as he should need them. Once he thought to talk with
Richard face to face, but this he felt he could not do; so one
morning about a week after the return of the family to Cedar
Grove, and when Rose was out of danger, he pressed a
burning kiss upon her forehead, and placing the letters on
the little dressing bureau where they would attract the immediate
attention of Mr. Delafield, who, he knew would soon
be there, he went in quest of Mrs. Lansing, whom he bade
323good-bye as composedly as if no inward fire were consuming
him. In much surprise, she asked why he left them so abruptly,
and he replied, “something which has recently come
to my knowledge makes it necessary for me to go.”
“You will of course return ere long for Miss Lee,” continued
the lady, who had no suspicion of the truth.
“If I do not come I shall send her brother as soon as she
is able to be moved,” said he. “She does not know that I
am going, for she would not understand me if I told her, so
I leave it with you to tell her when you think she will comprehend
it.”
Then leaving a few directions as to how she must be treated,
he hurried away, never looking back, and turning into a
side street when in the distance he saw Mr. Delafield coming
towards him. Half an hour afterward and the puffing engine,
which now each day thundered into town, was bearing
him away from a place whither he had come for a bride, and
from which he bore only a crushed and aching heart.
Scarcely had he left Rose’s chamber when a colored woman
entered it to “set it to rights” as was her daily custom.
She was near-sighted, and going up to the dressing-bureau,
carelessly brushed off the letter directed to Richard! Falling
behind the bureau, it lay concealed from view, while the
negress proceeded with her duties, unconscious of the mischief
she had done!
In great surprise Richard heard of Dr. Clayton’s sudden
departure. “There must be something wrong,” he thought,
though what he did not know. Going up to Rosa’s chamber,
he found her still asleep. The room was in order—the servant
gone, and on the bureau lay the letter which soon caught
his attention. Glancing at the superscription he saw it
was for Rose, and thinking to keep it safely until she could understand
its contents, he placed it in his pocket; then taking a
324book, he sat by her bedside until she awoke. She was apparently
better, but an unnatural brightness of her eyes told
that her mind was still unsettled. So he said nothing to
her concerning the doctor’s desertion, but himself ministered
to her wants.
In the course of a few days Mrs. Lansing was induced to
visit her. This she did more willingly, for Rose had loved her
little Jessie; she would weep bitterly when she knew she
was dead; and the proud nature of the haughty woman gave
way to the softer feelings, which often prompts a mother to
take a deeper interest in whatever was once dear to a lost,
a precious child. So casting aside her nervous fear, she at
last went frequently to the sick-room, her own white, delicate
hands sometimes arranging the tumbled pillow or holding
the cooling draught to the lips of her formerly despised
governess—despised, not for anything which she had done,
but because it was hers to labor for the bread she ate.
CHAPTER XXVII. LIGHT.
325
It was early morning. The windows of my room were
open, admitting the fresh, cool air, which had been purified
by one of those terrific thunder storms, so common in a
southern clime. For many weeks I had lain there in a state
of unconsciousness, save at intervals when I had a dreamy
realization of what was transpiring around me. The physician
who was called in Dr. Clayton’s stead had more than
once hinted of continued insanity, citing similar cases which
had come under his observation; but in spite of his opinion,
I, that bright August morning, awoke from a refreshing
sleep, with perfectly restored faculties. At first I thought I
was alone, for there was a deep stillness in the room, and
from the hall below I distinctly heard the ticking of the
clock, reminding me of the time, years ago, when once before
I had hovered between life and death. Now, as then, I
experienced the delicious feeling of returning health, but I
missed the familiar faces of my friends, and as I thought
how far I was from home, and all who loved me, I said aloud,
“I am alone, alone.”
“Not alone, Rosa, for I am with you,” answered a deep
voice near, and the next moment the dark form of Richard
Delafield bent over me.
Eagerly scanning my face, he said, “Do you know me?”
326“Yes,” I answered. “Mr. Delafield.” Then as a dim remembrance
of the past came over me, I lifted my head and
looked around the room for one who I knew had not long
since been there.
Divining my thought, he said very gently, as if the announcement
would of course give me pain, “He is not here,
Rosa. He was obliged to go home, but I dare say he will
soon return—meantime I will take care of you. Don’t feel
so badly,” he continued, as tears of genuine joy at Dr. Clayton’s
absence gathered in my eyes.
I could not tell him the truth, and when I next spoke it
was to ask him concerning my illness, how long it had been,
etc.
After telling me all that he thought proper, he took the
letter from his pocket, and said, “Dr. Clayton left this for
you. Have you strength to read it now?”
“Yes, yes,” I replied eagerly, at the same time stretching
out my hand to take it.
There was a blur upon my eyes as I read, and I pitied Dr.
Clayton, who had thus laid bare to me his wretchedness, but
mingled with this was a feeling of relief to know that I was free.
He told me what he had written to Mr. Delafield, and when
I came to that portion of the letter, I involuntarily uttered
an exclamation of delight, while I glanced timidly towards
him. But he made no sign. The letter which would have
explained all was safely lodged behind the bureau, and with
a gloomy brow he watched me while I read, interpreting my
emotions into the satisfaction he naturally supposed I would
feel in hearing from my lover. With me the revulsion was
too great, for I fancied I saw in the expression of his face
contempt for one who had presumed to love him, and bursting
into tears, I cried and laughed alternately, while he tried to
soothe me; but I would not be comforted by him—he hated
327me, I knew, and very pettishly I told him at last “to let me
alone and go away—I was better without him than with
him,” I said, “and he would oblige me by leaving the
room.”
The next moment I repented my harshness, which I knew
had caused him pain, for there was a look of sorrow upon his
face as he complied with my request. But I was too proud
to call him back, and for the next half hour I cried and fretted
alone, first at him for making Dr. Clayton think he loved
me when he didn’t, secondly, at Dr. Clayton for meddling
with what didn’t concern him, and lastly, at myself, for being
so foolish as to care whether anybody loved me or not!
At the end of that time Richard came back. The cloud had
disappeared, and very good-humoredly he asked “if I had
got over my pet, and if I wanted anything.”
I did not, but wishing to make amends for my former ill humor,
I asked him to shut the windows, which he did, opening
them again in less than five minutes, and fanning me furiously,
I was “so hot and fidgety.” For several hours he
humored all my whims and caprices, and then, as he saw I
was tiring myself out, he began to exercise his authority
over me, telling me once, I remember, “to lie still and behave,
or I would make myself worse!”
Intimidated by his voice and manner, I sank down among
my pillows, nor stirred again until I awoke from a sweet
sleep into which I had fallen. This time he was gone, but
Mrs. Lansing was with me, and the tones of her voice seemed
unusually kind as she addressed me. Richard again came
in, bearing a beautiful bouquet, which he presented to me
“as a peace offering,” he said, “for having scolded me so in
the morning.”
Before night I was so much better that Ada, Lina, and Halbert
came in to see me, each expressing their pleasure at my
328convalescence. But one there was who came not to greet
me, and at whose absence I greatly marvelled. She had
ever been the first to meet me in the morning, and the last to
leave me at night. Why, then, did she tarry now, when I
wished so much to see her? Alas, I did not know that
never again would her home be gladdened by the sunshine
of her presence, for it was Jessie whom I missed—Jessie for
whom I longed—straining my ear to catch the sound of her
ringing laugh, or bounding footsteps.
At last, as the day wore on and she did not come, I asked
for her and why she stayed so long away.
Wringing her hands, Mrs. Lansing exclaimed, “Tell her,
Richard, I cannot. It will kill me. Oh, Jessie, Jessie!”
But I had no need for further knowledge. I saw what I
had not before observed, viz., the mourning garments of
those around me, and in tears of anguish, I cried, “My darling
is dead!”
“Yes, Jessie is dead,” answered Richard. “We shall
never see her again, for she is safe in the Happy Land, of
which you so often told her.”
I could not weep. My sorrow was too great for tears,
and covering my face I thought for a long, long time. “Why
was it,” I asked myself, “that always when death had hovered
near me, I had been spared, and another taken,” for, as in
the case of Jessie, so had it been with brother Jamie—they
had died, while I had lived, and with a fervent thanksgiving
to Heaven, which had dealt thus mercifully with me, I prayed
that it might not be in vain.
Gradually, as I could bear it, Mr. Delafield told me the
sad story—how she had hung fearlessly over my pillow when
all else had deserted me—how she had come for him—and
how naught but her mother’s peremptory commands had
taken her from my side. As he talked, there came back to
329me a vague recollection of a fairy form, a seraph I thought it
to have been, which, when the dark river was running fast at
my feet, had hovered near, whispering to me words of love,
and bidding some one bury me beneath the tall magnolia.
Then he told me how she had stood like a ministering spirit
by the rude couch of the poor Africans, who, with their dying
breath, had blessed her, calling her “The Angel of the
Pines.” From her head he himself had shorn her beautiful
shining curls, one of which he gave to me, and which I prize
as my most precious treasure; for often as I look upon it, I
see again the little gleeful girl, my “Georgia rose,” who, for
a brief space, dwelt within her fair southern home, and was
then transplanted to her native soil, where now she blooms,
the fairest, sweetest flower of all which deck the fields of
heaven.
The shock of her death very naturally retarded my recovery,
and for many weeks more was I confined to my room.
About the middle of October, Charlie, whose coming I had
long expected, arrived, bringing to me the sad news that
death had again entered our household, that by my father’s
and Jamie’s grave was another mound, and at home another
vacant chair, that of my aged grandmother, whose illness,
he said, had prevented him from coming to me sooner, adding
further that they had purposely kept her sickness
from me, fearing the effect it might have. Of Dr. Clayton
he could tell me but little. He had not visited
Meadow Brook at all, but immediately after his return to
Boston, he had written to them, saying I was out of danger,
and Charlie must go for me as soon as the intense heat of
summer was over. This was all they knew, though with
woman’s ready tact, both my mother and my sisters conjectured
that something was wrong, and Charlie’s first question
after telling me what he did, was to inquire into the existing
330state of affairs between me and the doctor, and if it were my
illness alone which had deferred the marriage.
“Don’t ask me now,” I replied, “not until we are far
from here, and then I will tell you all.”
This silenced Charlie, and once when Mr. Delafield questioned
him concerning Dr. Clayton, and why he, too, did
not come for me, he replied evasively, but in a manner calculated
still further to mislead Mr. Delafield, who had no
suspicion of the truth, though he fancied there was something
wrong. In the meantime he was to me the same kind
friend, ministering to all my wants, and with a lavish generosity
procuring for me every delicacy, however costly it
might be.
One day Charlie, with his usual abruptness, said to me,
“Rose, why didn’t you fall in love with Mr. Delafield. I
should much rather have him than a widower?”
The hot blood rushed to my cheeks as I replied quickly,
“He is engaged to Miss Montrose. They were to have been
married this fall, Mrs. Lansing said, but the marriage is, I
presume, deferred on account of their recent affliction. At
least I hear nothing said of it.”
“If I am any judge of human nature,” returned Charlie,
“Mr. Delafield cares far more for you than for Miss Montrose,
even if they are engaged. But then you are poor,
while she is rich, and that I suppose makes the difference.”
I knew Mr. Delafield too well to suspect him of mercenary
motives in marrying Ada, and so I said, “He loved her, of
course, and it was natural that he should, for though she had
some faults, he probably saw in her enough of good to overbalance
the bad.”
And still I could not help thinking that, as Charlie had
said, his attentions to me were far more lover-like than they
were towards her. But then I fancied that his kindness
331was prompted by the pity which he felt for me, a young girl
so far from home. Thus the days wore on, leaving me deceived—and
him deceived, while the letter still lay behind
the bureau!
At last the morning dawned on which I was to say good-bye
to the scenes I loved so well. I was to leave the “sunny
South,” with its dark evergreens, its flowering vines, its
balmy air. I was to leave him, who, ere the next autumn
leaves were falling, would take to his beautiful home a bride.
Then I thought of little Jessie’s grave, which I had not
seen, and on which my tears would never fall, and taking
from its hiding-place the tress of shining hair, I wept over
that my last adieu. It was later than usual when Mr. Delafield
appeared, and as he came in I saw that he was very
pale.
“Are you sick?” I asked, as he wiped the perspiration
from his face.
“No, no,” he hurriedly answered; at the same time crossing
over to a side table, he poured out and drank two large
goblets of ice water.
Then resuming his former seat near me, he took my hand,
and looking me earnestly in my face, said, “Rose, shall I
ever see you here again?”
Before I could answer, Ada chimed in, “Of course we
shall. Do coax the doctor to bring you here sometime, and
let us see how you bear the honors of being madam!”
Instantly the earnest look passed away from Mr. Delafield’s
face, and was succeeded by a scowl, which remained
until the carriage which was to take me to the dépôt was
announced. Then the whole expression of his countenance
changed, and for a brief instant my heart thrilled with joy,
for I could not mistake the deep meaning of his looks as he
bent over me and whispered his farewell.
332“God bless you, Rose,” he said. “My Rose I once hoped
to call you. But it cannot be. Farewell!”
There was one burning kiss upon my lips, and the next moment
he was gone.
“Are you going to the dépôt?” asked his sister, as he
was leaving the room.
“No, no, no,” he replied, and then as Charlie again bade
me come, I rose bewildered to my feet, hardly realizing when
Mrs. Lansing, Ada and Lina bade me adieu.
Halbert went with me in the carriage, and together with
Charlie looked wonderingly at me, as I unconsciously repeated
in a whisper, “My Rose I once hoped to call you. It is
Ada who stands in the way,” I said to myself, and covering
my face with my veil, I wept as I thought of all I had lost
when Richard Delafield offered his heart to another. He did
love me. I was sure of that, but what did it avail me. He
was too honorable to break his engagement with Ada, so
henceforth I must walk alone, bearing the burden of an aching
heart.
“Oh, I have loved you so much,” said Halbert, winding
his arms about my neck—“loved you as I shall never love
another teacher,” and the boy’s tears flowed fast as he bade
me good-bye.
One parting glance at Cedar Grove, one last lingering
look at Sunny Bank, one thought of Jessie’s grave, and then
the hissing engine shot out into the woods, leaving them all
behind. Leaning back on Charlie’s arm and drawing my
veil over my face, I thought how impossible it was that I
should ever visit that spot again.
333In the meantime a far different scene was being enacted
in the apartment I had just vacated. Scarcely had the
whistle of the engine died away in the distance, when a troop
of blacks, armed with boiling suds and scrubbing-brushes,
entered my chamber for the purpose of cleaning it. They
had carried from it nearly every article of furniture, and
nothing remained save the matting and the bureau, the latter
of which they were about to remove when they were surprised
at the unexpected appearance of Mr. Delafield, who
could not resist the strong desire which he felt to stand once
more in the room where Rose had spent so many weary
weeks. For a moment the blacks suspended their employment,
and then Linda, who seemed to be leading, took hold
of the bureau, giving one end of it a shove towards the centre
of the room. The movement dislodged the long lost letter,
which, covered with dirt and cobwebs, fell upon the
floor, at her feet. She was the same woman who, weeks before,
had carelessly knocked off the letter, which she now
picked up and handed to Mr. Delafield, saying, as she wiped
off the dirt, “It must have laid thar a heap of a while, and
now I think on’t, ‘pears like ever so long ago, when I was breshin’
the bureau, I hearn somethin’ done drap, but I couldn’t
find nothin’, and it must have been this.”
Glancing at the superscription, and recognizing the handwriting
of Dr. Clayton, Mr. Delafield broke the seal, and
read! From black to white—from white to red—from red to
speckled—and from speckled back again to its natural color,
grew his face as he proceeded, while his eyes grew so dazzlingly
bright with the intensity of his feelings that the negroes,
who watched him, whispered among themselves that he
“must be gwine stark mad.”
His active, quick-seeing mind took in the meaning of each
sentence, and even before he had finished the letter he understood
334everything just as it was—why Rose had appeared
so strangely when she read Dr. Clayton’s letter to herself, and
realized perfectly what her feelings must have been as day
after day went by and he still “made no sign.”
“But she is mine now, thank Heaven! and nothing shall
take her from me,” he exclaimed aloud, unmindful of the
presence of the negroes, who, confirmed in their impression
of his insanity, looked curiously after him as he went down
the stairs, down the walk, and out into the street, proceeding
with rapid strides towards the dépôt.
CHAPTER XXVIII. THE CHASE.
335
The railroad which passed through W—— was only
a branch of the main route leading to Charleston, and consequently
there were but two passenger trains each way per
day; and as Mr. Delafield’s great object now was to reach
Charleston before the boat in which Rose was to sail should
leave the landing, it seemed impossible for him to wait until
night, for not until then was the next train due. Suddenly
he remembered that the express train left Augusta about
four o’clock P. M. It was now ten, and he could easily reach
it in time for the cars, provided there had been no change
in the time table. To ascertain this, therefore, he hastened
to the dépôt, where to his dismay he learned that the train
left Augusta at two.
But with him to will was to do. Flying rather than
walking back to his house, he called out Bill, his coachman,
startling him with the inquiry as to whether it would be
possible, with his best horses, a span of beautiful dappled
greys, which were valued at a thousand dollars, to drive to
Augusta in less than four hours.
Besides being naturally lazy and unwilling for exertion of
any kind, Bill was also remarkably tender of said greys, who
were his pride, and whom he had named Fred and Ferd. On
hearing his master’s inquiry, therefore, he looked perfectly
336aghast, and diving both hands into his matted wool, by way
of illustration undoubtedly, replied, “Mighty tough scratchin’,
I can tell you, mars’r. Them ponies hain’t been driv, only
what I’ve ex’cized ’em for health, for better’n a month, and
to run ’em as I’d hev to run ’em, would kill ’em stone dead.
No, mars’r, can’t think on’t for a minit,” and as if this were
conclusive, and his word the law, Bill stuffed his hands into
his bagging trousers, and was walking quietly away, when Mr.
Delafield stopped him, saying, “I shall try it at all events.
So get out the carriage immediately, and mind you are not
over five minutes doing it. Ask some one to help you, if
necessary—ho, Jack,” and he called to a ragged mulatto
boy who was doing nothing, and bade him assist Bill in harnessing
the horses.
Rolling his white eyes in utter astonishment at what
seemed to him the folly of his master, Bill began to expostulate,
“Lor, mars’er, you kill”——
“Silence, and do as I bid you,” said Mr. Delafield, in a
tone which Bill thought best to obey, and sauntering off to
the stables, he brought out the ponies, who pranced and
pawed the ground, while he admired their flowing manes
and smooth shining coats.
Then seeing Jack standing near, ready to help, he haughtily
ordered him away, saying, “Nobody but myself is fit to
tache these critters. They’d know in a minit if a low-lived
nigger like you came a near.”
Nothing loth, Jack walked off, while Bill proceeded leisurely
to harness the beautiful animals, talking to them as if
they were intelligent beings, and telling them, “never to
fear—they wan’t a gwine to be druv to Gusty in two hours,
and no sich thing. Bill sot on the box, and ’twas nothin’ to
mars’r, who was lollin on the cushions inside.”
At this point he was startled by the voice of Mr. Delafield,
337who, having hastily packed a few articles in his portmanteau,
and written a line to his sister, had come out to
superintend in person the movements of his servant, whose
peculiarities he perfectly understood.
“So ho,” said he, “you mean to cheat me do you?” at the
same time signifying his intention of having the horse go as
fast as he liked.
“The Lord help Fred and Ferd then, for Bill can’t,” was
the mental ejaculation of the negro as he saw the fire in his
master’s eye and knew he must be obeyed.
Still he managed to be as slow as possible, insisting that
“Ferd allus had to drink two buckets and a half, or he
wan’t wuth a dime,” adding in a conciliatory tone, that “with
two buckets and a half in him he’d run like lightnin’.”
Very impatiently Mr. Delafield waited for the disappearance
of the requisite amount of water, consulting his watch,
counting the minutes, and at last remarking that it took
Ferd a wonderful while to drink.
“That’s ’case he’s sich a ’strordinary beast every way,”
answered Bill, who for some little time had been holding an
empty bucket to the horse’s mouth.
He was going to replenish a third time when his master
ordered him back, telling him he could wait no longer; with
another glance at his watch, he entered the carriage, while
Bill, loudly lamenting the half bucket, without which Ferd
would surely die, mounted the box, where he spent quite a
while in comfortably disposing of his long, lank limbs and in
adjusting his palmleaf hat.
“Go on, you rascal,” shouted Mr. Delafield, beginning to
lose his temper; and gathering up the reins, Bill whistled to
the spirited animals, who dashed off at a far greater speed
than their driver thought was at all conducive to their well
being.
338“Hold on dar, Ferd! Stop dat foolin’, will you, Fred!
Easy dar, both on you, for you come mighty nigh histin’ me
off de box!”
This last was said quite loud for the benefit of Mr. Delafield,
who, perceiving that their speed had slackened, for
they were well trained and readily obeyed Bill’s voice, called
out, “Drive faster, I tell you. Give them the ribbons,
and let them run.”
“Lor’ a’mighty,” answered Bill, now coming to a dead
halt in order that his master might be better impressed with
what he said. “You don’t understand hoss flesh. At this
rate you kills ’em in less than no time. Ferd never ‘ill stan’
it with them two buckets of water, ’case you see how shakin’
him up dis way dey’ll get bilin’ hot and nobody can live
with bilin’ water in ’em.”
Provoked as he was, Mr. Delafield could not repress a
smile at the subterfuges of Bill to spare his horses, but he
bade him drive on, saying, however, that he need not drive
them at the top of their speed immediately, as they would
be more likely to give out, “but after a mile or two,” he
continued, “put them through with the whip if necessary.”
“Lor’ mars’r,” answered Bill from the box, without moving
an inch, “I never tache them with a whip in de world.
Fred would jump clar out of his skin. All dey want to
make ’em kill deyselves is a loose rein and a whistle—so.”
Suiting the action to the word, he whistled long and loud,
whereupon the horses started forward as if a volley of artillery
had been fired at their heels, while mingled with the
roll of the wheels, Mr. Delafield heard the distressed Bill,
saying. “Whoa, dar, Ferdinand, can’t you whoa when I tell
you. Think of the bilin’ water, and keep easy. Come Frederic,
you set him a ’xample. That’s a good boy, no ’casion
for all dis hurry, if we misses one train we catches another.
339All de same thing. We ain’t chasin’ a runaway gal’ as I
knows of.”
After a little he succeeded in stopping them, and for the
next ten or fifteen minutes they proceeded on rather leisurely,
and Bill was beginning to think his master had come
to his senses, when he was startled with the stern command,
“Let them run now as fast as they will. Don’t check them
at all until we reach the dépôt.”
Accordingly, for a mile or so the horses rushed on at headlong
speed, Bill sympathizing with them deeply and mentally
promising himself “to tend ’em mighty keerful to pay for this.”
At last, when he thought it safe to do so, he held them in,
taking the precaution, however to say aloud, “Get along
dar, Ferd—none your lazy tricks here when mars’r’s in sich
a hurry. Can’t you get along dar, I say. An’ you Fred,
wake up yer bones to de merits of de case.”
But if in this way he thought to deceive the resolute man
inside he was mistaken. Perceiving that their speed was
considerably slackened, and hearing Bill loudly reproach the
horses for their laziness, Mr. Delafield softly opened the carriage
door, and leaning out, learned the cause of the delay.
Bolt upright upon the box, with his brawny feet firmly braced
against the dash-board so as to give him more power, sat
Bill, clutching the reins with might and main, for the horses’
mettle was up and it required his entire strength to keep
them from running furiously! All this time, too, the cunning
negro kept chiding them for their indolence in moving
so slowly!
“Bill,” said Mr. Delafield, sternly, “stop the carriage instantly.”
“Lord a massy, mars’r,” exclaimed the frightened Bill.
“You almost skeered me off de box. Ferd won’t get along
no how. I tells him and I tells him how you’r in de hurry—don’t
340you mind how I keeps telling him to get along, I
reckons he wants dat t’other half bucket of water.”
“I understand you perfectly,” said Mr. Delafield, alighting
from the carriage, and to the utter astonishment of Bill,
mounting the box and taking the reins in his own hands. “I
understand your tricks, and for the rest of the way I shall
drive myself!”
Rolling his eyes wildly in their sockets, the crest fallen
Bill folded his arms and resigned the horses to their fate,
saying mentally, “I shall war mournin’ for ’em, I shall,
and he may help hisself.”
Over rough and stony places—over smooth and sandy
roads—over hills, over plains—through the woods, through
the swamps, and through the winding valleys, on they sped
like lightning, the excited horses covered with foam, their
driver stern, silent and determined, while poor Bill, with the
perspiration streaming down his shining face, kept up a continued
expostulation, “Now, mars’r, for de dear Lord’s sake,
stop ’em ‘fore dey draps down dead. Look at de white
specks all over Ferd’s back—he’ll never stan’ it without
dat t’other half bucket. You kills ’em sartin, and dar goes
a thousand dollars, smack and clean.”
But Bill’s entreaties were all in vain, and his distress was
at its height, when fortunately his thoughts were diverted
in another channel. At a sudden turn of the road a gust of
wind lifted the old palmleaf from his woolly head, and carried
it far away. “Now, dear Mars’r,” said Bill, laying his
hand on that of Mr. Delafield, “you’ll sartin let ’em breathe
while I picks up my hat, ’case you see how’ll you look
gwine into town wid a barheaded nigger. In de Lord’s
name, stop,” he continued, as he saw in his master no signs
of relenting.
Glancing over his shoulder Mr. Delafield saw the hat away
341over the fields, and quietly taking a bill from his pocket and
placing it in the negro’s hand, he replied; “That will buy
you five such hats.”
“Yes, but de hosses, lor’ a mighty, de hosses!” exclaimed
Bill almost frantically, “Don’t you see Ferd is gwine to
gin out?”
Mr. Delafield feared so, too, and more to himself than to
his servant, he said, “perhaps the cars will be behind time,
they usually are.”
Without considering the consequences, Bill answered, “No
they won’t; case I hear how they hired a tarin’ Yankee for
an engine, and he drives all afore him—gits ahead of de
time and all dat.”
The next minute he repented a speech whose disastrous
effects he foresaw, and he was about to deny it as a fabrication
of his own brain, when his master, who really saw signs
of lagging in the nervous, fiery Ferd, said, “Bill, you have
a peculiar whistle with which you spur up the horses—make
it now; Ferd has run himself almost down.”
“De Lord have massy on us,” groaned Bill, wiping away
a tear; then, as Mr. Delafield repeated his order, he said, in
a whining tone, “Can’t, mars’r, no how; case you see my
throat is dreffle sore, ridin’ barheaded so in the breeze
which you kicks up—can’t, no how.”
“But you must,” persisted Mr. Delafield.
Bill still refused, until at last, as they approached the town,
they heard a heavy, rumbling sound. It was the roll of cars
in the distance, and starting up, Mr. Delafield seized the
negro by the shoulder and in thunder tones called out,
“Whistle.”
“Lord, mars’r I will, I will,” gasped Bill, terrified at the
fiery gleam of his master’s eye, and from his mouth there
issued a most unearthly sound, which mingled with the
342shriek of the fast coming engine, urged on the jaded horses
to one more desperate effort.
A few more mad plunges and they reached the dépôt,
covered with foam and frothing at the mouth, just as the
train was moving slowly away. With one pitying farewell
glance at his dying greys, Mr. Delafield exclaimed, “Cut
the harness instantly,” and then with a bound sprung upon
the platform, which he reached just as Bill called after him
in mournful accents, “Ferd’s dead, mars’r, Ferd is,” while,
mingled with the roar of the machinery he caught the faint
echo of something about “t’other half bucket of water!”
But little cared he for that. Rosa Lee was to be overtaken,
and to accomplish this, he would willingly have sacrificed
every horse of which he was owner, even were they
twice as valuable as the dappled greys.
So, wishing him a successful journey, and leaving him on
the same seat with a Yankee peddler, who saw him when he
came up and “guessed he was after a runaway nigger,” we
return for a moment to Bill, who with tears streaming from
his eyes, patched the struggles of Fred until the noble animal
was dead, bringing him water which he vainly coaxed
him to drink, while the bystanders, who crowded around,
asked him innumerable questions as to why they drove so
fast and where his master was going.
To the first Bill could not reply, but to the last he promptly
answered, as he patted the remains of the departed Ferdinand,
“Gwine to the devil, in course! Whar you spect a
white man to go, what treats hosses in dis kind of style,
won’t let ’em hev all the water dey wants and drives ’em till
dey draps dead in der tracks.”
The story of the half bucket was duly rehearsed, Bill
firmly believing that if Ferd had drank it, he would undoubtedly
have lived “dis minit and been as spry as a cricket.
343But now he’s dead and Fred, too,” continued the negro, as
the latter ceased to move. “Sich another span of hosses,
that ain’t in all Georgy,” and laying his black face upon the
neck of the insensible Ferd, the negro cried like a child.
“There is one comfort, at least, my boy,” said a gentlemanly
looking man, who stood near and who knew Mr. Delafield,
“your horses didn’t suffer, for they were too much
excited.”
This in a measure consoled Bill, who, wiping his eyes,
asked what he was to do with them, saying he “never could
dig thar grave.”
“My negroes shall do it for you,” answered the stranger,
and in a short time several stalwart men were busy in an
adjacent field making a grave for the dappled greys, which
they carefully buried, while on a stump, with his head resting
on his knees, sat Bill as chief mourner.
“I wish I knew a prar,” he whispered to himself, “for if
ever hosses ’sarved it they do;” but the rude African had
never prayed since he was a little child, and thinking himself
too old to begin now, he rose up from the stump, just as his
companions, having finished their task, were beginning to
ridicule his bare head, telling him he must have an unkind
master, judging from his own appearance and the sad
fates of the horses, while one of them advised him to run
away.
This was touching Bill in a tender point, for though he
had loved the horses much, he loved his master more, and he
would not hear him censured; accordingly he retorted petulantly
that “thar warn’t a better master in all Georgy than
mars’r Dick, nor a richer one neither,—and ’twan’t nobody’s
business if he killed five hundred horses—he could afford
it—’twan’t as though he was poor and owned nothin’ but
a few low trash like the ’Gusty niggers!”
344This insinuation the “Gusty niggers,” chose to resent as
an insult, and a regular negro fight ensued, in which Bill,
being the weaker party, came off rather badly beaten, his
face being scratched in several places, while his pants
received a huge rent, which in no wise tended to improve his
personal appearance. Matters being at last amicably adjusted,
the victorious party returned home, while Bill, who had
frequently been in Augusta with his master, wended his way
to a hatter’s shop, where he soon made himself the owner
of a second-hand beaver, which at his request was ornamented
by a weed of crape as a badge of mourning for his
favorite steeds. Then seeing that the carriage was safely
stowed away, he started on foot for home, stopping at the
negro quarters of almost every plantation to relate his wonderful
adventures. As he was perfectly trusty and faithful,
he was always allowed to carry a pass by his good natured
master and thus he found no difficulty in his journey, which
he took quite leisurely, never reaching Sunny Bank until the
close of the second day after the one on which he had left
it.
In the meantime Mr. Delafield, with closely knit brows
and compressed lip, his usual look when he was in deep
thought, sat musing of the time when Rosa Lee would be his
wife, while at his side the Yankee peddler, with his basket of
essence carefully stowed under the seat, was casting curious
glances at his companion, whose history he was desirous of
knowing. But there was something in Mr. Delafield’s appearance
which forbade familiarity, so for once the loquacious
Yankee was silent.
They were now about half-way between Augusta and
Charleston and going at great speed, when suddenly at a
short curve there was a violent commotion—the passengers
were pitched forward and backward, while the engine
345plunged down a steep embankment, throwing the train
from the track and dragging after it the baggage
car, which in some way became detached from the
rest. The new “Yankee engineer” was a daring, reckless
fellow, who at the North had been discharged for carelessness,
and had come to try his fortune at the South. Fortunately
no one was seriously hurt except Mr. Delafield, whose
injuries were simply mental, as he knew this accident would
probably detain them for many hours. In a perfect storm
of excitement he stalked up and down the track, asking the
conductor every few minutes how long it would probably be
before they could go on, and at last growing so dark in his
face that the Yankee, after looking over his essence basket
and finding but few of his bottles broken, ventured to say,
“Now, Squire, don’t git mad at a feller for askin’ a sassy
question, but I raley du want to know if there ain’t a little
atom of black blood in you?”
“Very likely,” answered Mr. Delafield; while the Yankee,
now that the ice was broken, continued to ply him with
questions, which, though very annoying to the haughty
Southerner, tended to relieve in a measure the tediousness
of waiting.
The sun had long been set and the stars were shining
brightly ere they were able to proceed, and it was after midnight
when they at last reached Charleston. Driving
immediately to the lauding, Mr. Delafield to his great joy
found that the steamer bound for New York still lay at the
wharf and would not start until morning. But was Rosa
Lee on board? That was a question which puzzled him, and
as there was no way of satisfying himself until morning, he
sat down in one of the state rooms and rather impatiently
awaited the dawn of day.
346The hurry—the confusion—and the excitement of starting
was over. We were out upon the deep blue sea, and from
the window of my state-room I watched the distant shore
as it slowly receded from view, and felt that I was leaving
the land of sunlight and of flowers. Notwithstanding the
fatiguing journey of the previous day, I was better this
morning than I had been for many months before, for I had
slept quietly through the night.
An hour or two after breakfast Charlie came to me with
a very peculiar expression on his face and asked me to go
upon deck, saying the fresh breeze would do me good. I
consented willingly, and throwing on my shawl and a
simple Leghorn flat which had been of much service to
me at Cedar Grove, and which Mr. Delafield had often said
was very becoming, I went out with Charlie, who led me to
the rear of the boat, where he said we were not so liable to
be disturbed. Seating me upon a small settee he asked to
be excused for a few moments, saying I should not be long
alone. The motion of the boat produced a slight dizziness
in my head, and leaning my elbow upon the arm of the settee
I shaded my eyes with my hand and sat lost in thought
until I heard the sound of a footstep.
“It was Charlie,” I said, so I did not look up, even when
he sat down by my side and wound his arm around me,
wrapping my shawl closer together, oh, so gently! “Charlie
is very tender of me since my sickness,” I thought, and
much I loved that he should thus caress me. It thrilled me
strangely, bringing back to my mind the night when I sat
in the vine-wreathed arbor, where I should never sit again.
For a moment there was perfect silence and I could hear
the beating of Charlie’s heart. Then leaning forward and
removing my hand from my eyes, he pressed a kiss upon my
lips and whispered as he did so, “My own Rose!”
347Once, when I was apparently dying, the sound of that
voice had called me back to life, and now with a cry of joy
I sprang to my feet and turning round, stood face to face
with Richard Delafield, who, stretching his arms towards me,
said, “Come to my bosom, Rose. Henceforth it is your
resting-place.”
The shock was too much for me in my weak state. A
faintness stole over me, and if I obeyed his command, it was
because I could not help it!
When I returned to consciousness, Richard’s arms were
around me, and my head was resting upon his bosom, while
he whispered to me words which I leave to the imagination,
as I dare not give them to the world, lest he (Uncle Dick I
call him) should be angry in his way, and I have learned
to be a very little afraid of him since that morning when
on board the steamer Delphine we sat and talked together
of the past.
Wonderingly I listened while he told me how long he had
loved me—how once he had thought to tell me of his love,
but the manner in which I answered his leading question
disheartened him, for he feared his affection was not returned—how
it had filled his heart with bitter grief when he saw
me about to marry another—how his sister had deceived
him or he should have spoken to me then—and how in a
moment of temptation when he stood over my pillow he had
asked that I might die, for he would far rather that death
should be his rival than a fellow man. Then as he thought
how near I had been to the dark valley he shudderingly
drew me closer to his side and told me how he had wondered
at Dr. Clayton’s leaving me so abruptly and how sometimes
when a ray of hope was beginning to dawn upon him, it had
been chilled by my manner, which he now understood.
“You cannot conceive,” said he in conclusion, “what my
348feelings were yester morn when I bade you adieu, nor yet
can you comprehend the overwhelming delight I experienced
when I read that letter and felt that you would at last be
mine.”
When he had ceased to speak I took up the story and
told him of all my own feelings, and that nothing would ever
have induced me to think for a moment of becoming Dr.
Clayton’s wife, but the belief that he was engaged to
Ada, a story which I told him his sister affirmed when I
went to her for counsel.
“And so Angeline played a double part,” said he, sighing
deeply; “I never thought she could be guilty of so much deception,
though I have always known she was averse to my
marrying any one.”
Of Ada he said that never for a moment had he been engaged
to her. “She is to me like a sister,” said he, “and though
I know she has many faults, I am greatly attached to her, for
we have lived together many years. She was committed to
my care by her father and I shall always be faithful to my
trust. And if, dear Rose, in the future, circumstances should
render it necessary for her to live with us, shall you object?
She cannot harm you now.”
He had talked to me much of his love, but, not a word
before had he said of my sharing his home at Sunny Bank,
so I rather coquettishly answered, “You talk of my living
with you as a settled matter, and still you have not asked
me if I would.”
A shadow for a moment darkened his face, and then with
a very quizzical expression he made me a formal offer of
himself and fortune, asking me pointedly if I would accept
it—and—and, well, of course, I did what my readers knew
I would do when I first told them of the dark man at the
theatre—I said yes, and promised to return with him to
349Sunny Bank as soon as my health would permit, which he
was positive would be in a very few weeks, for he should be
my daily physician, and “love,” he said, “would work miracles.”
Thus you see we were engaged—Richard and I!
CHAPTER XXIX. HUMAN NATURE.
350
The sun had set on Cedar Grove, and together on the
broad, airy piazza sat Mrs. Lansing and Ada, rather impatiently
waiting for Richard, whom they had not seen since he
left them so abruptly in the morning. Greatly relieved at
the absence of one whom she had in a measure dreaded as a
rival, Ada began to hope that the conquest of her guardian
would now be a comparatively easy matter, and as she
knew the effect which a pretty face and a becoming dress
had upon him, she had spent a great deal of time upon this
evening’s toilet, and looked unusually young and handsome
in her pale blue tissue, with her soft curls falling over her
white uncovered neck.
That day she had talked a long time with Mrs. Lansing,
who had not only expressed her willingness to receive her as
a sister, but had also promised to do whatever she could to
forward the matter. Believing Mrs. Lansing to have far
more influence over her brother than she really had, Ada
began to entertain hopes of soon becoming a bride, and when
she thought no one could see her, actually wrote upon a
card, “Mr. and Mrs. R. Delafield,” just to see how it would
look! It looked well, she thought, and smoothing from her
brow a frown which had been caused by her finding among
351her waving tresses a long white hair, she went down to the
piazza to await Richard’s coming.
“He has not been here since morning, and I am sure he’ll
come to-night. You know he has latterly been a most constant
visitor,” remarked Mrs. Lansing.
“Yes, but possibly the attraction which kept him so much
here is gone,” faintly suggested Ada.
“Fie!” returned Mrs. Lansing, with a toss of her head.
“I know Richard better than that, and though he may at one
time have felt a slight interest in Miss Lee, I am positive
’tis nothing serious, or lasting. Only think of it, Richard
Delafield marry my governess, a poor schoolmistress! What
would his fashionable acquaintance in Augusta and Charleston
say, setting aside our friends in New Orleans!”
And on the proud woman’s face there was a sneer at the
very idea of her brother’s thus disgracing himself.
“Hark! I do believe he’s coming,” said Ada, as she heard
approaching footsteps, and she had just time to adjust her
skirts gracefully when there stood before her, not Mr. Delafield,
but the servant to whom had been intrusted the note
for Mrs. Lansing.
This the negro had entirely forgotten until it was recalled
to his mind by the continued absence of his master, whose
return they had confidently expected before night. Taking
the note from his hand, Mrs. Lansing hastily glanced at its
contents, and then, with an exclamation of surprise, handed
it to Ada, who turned deathly pale as she saw her new-born
hopes crushed at once and forever; and if now she clasped
her hand upon her side, the action was not feigned, for a
pain, which blistering could not heal, was indeed there—the
pain of wounded pride at seeing a humble, obscure girl
preferred to herself. For several minutes not a word was
spoken, and then Mrs. Lansing, who knew it would not be
352politic to quarrel with her brother, said, “I am astonished
at Richard’s proceedings, but I suppose there is no help for
it, and we may as well make the best of it. Miss Lee ain’t
the worst girl in the world. She had many friends in the
village—was well educated, and with a few lessons from us
on some points of etiquette she may do very well.”
“Us,” angrily retorted Ada. “When I teach Dick
Delafield’s wife etiquette I shall be older than I am now.”
“And that you would not care to be;” said Mrs. Lansing,
a little sarcastically.
She was a woman, who, if essential to her own interest,
could turn with every breeze, and though she was not
pleased with her brother’s choice, she did not deem it advisable
to provoke his anger by quarrelling about it, for when
once roused, but few could cope with his resolute, determined
spirit. Then, too, Rosa Lee was yielding and generous,
and would not object even if her husband should bestow
half his fortune upon his sister; so after all it might be better
to have her the mistress of Sunny Bank than one like Ada,
who was more selfish and wanted everything for herself.
Thus Mrs. Lansing reasoned, coming at last to feel quite
amiably disposed towards Rosa Lee, whom she fully intended
to manage in her own way, and she was about making up
her mind to write a kind, sisterly letter to said Rosa, when
her attention was attracted by a loud sobbing, and looking
round she saw Ada weeping violently.
As well as she could love any one, Ada had loved her
guardian, and the knowledge that he was now lost to her,
overcame her for a time, and covering her face with her hands,
she cried aloud. Mrs. Lansing had never really loved
in her life, so she could not appreciate the feeling, and she
made no effort to soothe the weeping girl who that night
wet her pillow with bitter tears, and who next morning
353looked weary, pale and old, as she languidly took her seat
at the breakfast table. Still Ada was not one to love very
deeply, and as on this occasion her pride was touched rather
than her heart, she ere long grew calm, and with Mrs. Lansing
wisely resolved to make the best of it. Then, too, there
arose the very natural desire to conceal from Richard that
she had ever cared for him, and to do this she thought she
must pretend to be pleased with his choice. Accordingly
when Mrs. Lansing wrote to her brother, Ada inclosed a
gilt-edged note, in which she congratulated him upon his
intended marriage, telling him she had foreseen it from the
first, and ended by sending her love to “Rose.” Thus, because
she thought it would be for her interest, did Mrs.
Lansing deem it best to change her tactics, while Ada was
too proud to evince any open hostility, though in her heart
she hated the future bride and lamented the fatality which
had decreed that she should be rivalled by “both of those
Lee girls.”
CHAPTER XXX. “THE SOUTHERN PLANTER’S NORTHERN BRIDE.”
354
Over the New England hills the hazy light of a most
glorious Indian Summer was shining, while the forest trees,
in their gorgeous array of crimson and gold, lifted their tall
heads as proudly as if they heard not in the distance the
voice of coming sorrows, and the sighing of winter winds.
The birds had flown to their southern home where I fondly
hoped to meet them, for I was to be a bride—Richard’s
bride—and the day for my bridal had come. We had been
everywhere—Richard and I—all over the old Meadow
Brook farm, sacred to me for the many hallowed associations
which clustered around it, and very, very dear to him because
it was my childhood’s home. So he told me when we
stood for the last time beneath the spreading grape-vine,
and I pointed out to him the place where years before
I had lain in the long green grass and wept over the fickleness
of one who was naught to me now, save a near
friend.
Together we had sat in the old brown schoolhouse,—he
in the big arm chair, and I—but no matter where I sat
when I told him of the little romping girl with yellow hair,
who had there first learned to con the alphabet and to trace
on the gaily colored maps the boundary lines of Georgia, little
dreaming that her home would one day be there. Then
355when I showed him the bench where I had lain when the
faintness came over me, he wound his arm closer around me,—though
wherefore I do not know. Together too, we had
gone over the old farmhouse, he lingering longest in the
room where I was born, and when he thought I didn’t see
him, gathering a withered leaf from the rose bush which grew
beneath the window, and which I told him I had planted
when a little girl.
Every woman, young and old, in the neighborhood and
in the village had seen him, either face to face or from behind
the folds of a muslin curtain, some calling him “black
and ugly,” while others pronounced him “splendid,” and all I
believe united in saying that, “Rosa Lee had done wonders,
considering she had no great amount of beauty to do it
with!”
Once, when a remark like this came to Richard’s ear he
smiled quietly and said, “Rosa Lee is beautiful to me, for
though her face may lack perfect regularity of features and
brilliancy of complexion, she has beauty of a higher order, a
beauty of the mind, which is seen in her laughing blue eyes
and sunny smile.”
Thus you see, my reader, that Richard thought I was
handsome, while strange as it may seem there were others
who said so too, and even I was sensible of a thrill of pride,
such as I suppose conscious beauties feel, when I stood up before
the mirror and saw how well I looked in my bridal dress
of satin and lace—his gift, but not the same which he had
purchased for me some months before. At first I had proposed
wearing the one intended for Dr. Clayton’s bride, but
Richard would not suffer it, so I gave it to Lizzy, who, as
soon as John Thompson was of age, which would be in January,
would probably have need of it! This same John
was to be our groomsman and much he amused Richard by
356telling him of the tall, hateful boy who had once been a terror
to a little schoolma’am thirteen years of age, who now,
with a heightened bloom upon her cheek and a strange light
in her eye, stood waiting the summons to the parlor below.
It came at last and as I laid my hand on Richard’s arm he imprinted
a kiss upon my lips, “the last,” he said, “he should
ever give to Rosa Lee.”
Of what came next I have only a faint remembrance.
There was a rustling of satin upon the narrow stair-case,
down which Lizzie and I went a little in advance of Richard
and John Thompson, the latter of whom said something in
a low tone about hoops and the space they occupied! this
remark shocked me inexpressibly, but Richard didn’t seem to
mind it at all. As we passed the front door, the cool night
wind (for it was evening) blew over my face, reminding me
of the South, it was so soft and balmy. When we entered
the parlor, I was conscious of a goodly number of eyes fixed
upon me, and as I crossed over to a vacant spot under the
looking glass I heard more than one say in a whisper, “Isn’t
she pretty?” meaning Lizzie, I suppose! Then a man, whom
I recognized as the new Episcopal clergyman (I believe I’ve
never said that Richard was an Episcopalian) stood up before
us and said something about “You Richard—and You
Rose,” after which Richard placed a ring upon my finger
squeezing my hand a very little as he did so. Then followed
a short prayer, in which I fancied the minister made a
mistake in our names, inasmuch as he spoke of Isaac and Rebecca
instead of Richard and Rose! This being done I
glanced at the bridegroom. There was no scowl upon his
forehead now, and I could see the light shining out all over
his face as he bent down and gently whispered “my
wife!”
This dispelled the clouds at once, and as guest after guest
357crowded around, offering their congratulations, while Charlie
and John Thompson vied with each other in repeating my
new name, I began to realize that I was no longer Rosa Lee,
but Mrs. Richard Delafield.
CHAPTER XXXI. SUNNY BANK.
358
For a few days we lingered at my mother’s fireside, and
then, with the fall of the first snowflake, we left for our
southern home; Richard promising my mother, who was
loth to give me up, that when the summer birds came back
and roses were blooming again by the door, he would bring
his Rose to breathe once more the air of her native hills.
We stopped at New York, Philadelphia, Baltimore and
Washington, and it was not until the holidays were passed
that we landed at last at Charleston and took the cars for
W—— which we reached about dark.
With a loud cry of joy, Bill, who was waiting for us, welcomed
back his master, and then almost crushing my fingers
in his big black hand, said, with a sly wink, which he
meant should be very expressive, “I know, now what mass’r
kill dem hosses for!” at the same time making some apology
for the really sorry looking animals he was compelled to
drive in the place of the deceased Ferdinand and Frederic.
As we drove through the town I could not help contrasting
my present feelings with those of the year before, when I
thought I was leaving it forever. Then, weary, sick and
wretched, I had looked through blinding tears towards
Sunny Bank, which was now my home, while at my side,
with his arm around me, was its owner—my husband.
359“You tremble, Rose,” said he, as we drew near the house,
and he bade me be calmer, saying the meeting between myself
and his sister would soon be over.
But it was not that which I dreaded. It was the presentation
to his servants, to whom I bore the formidable relation
of mistress, and for whose good opinion I cared far more
than I did for that of the haughty Mrs. Lansing. Something
like this I said to Richard, who assured me that his
household would love me because I was his wife, if for no
other reason, and thus I found it to be. As we drove into
the yard, we were surprised at seeing the house brilliantly
lighted, while through the open windows forms of many persons
were seen moving to and fro.
In a displeased tone of voice Richard, said, “It is Angeline’s
work, and I do not like it, for you need rest, and are
too much fatigued to see any one to-night, but I suppose it
cannot be avoided. Ho, Bill,” he called to the driver, “who
is here?”
“Some de quality,” answered Bill, adding that “Miss
Angeline done ’vite ’em to see de bride.”
“She might at least have consulted my wishes,” said
Richard, while my heart sank within me at being obliged to
meet strangers in my jaded condition.
Mrs. Lansing, it seems, had in her mind a new piano for
Lina, their present one being rather old-fashioned, and as the
surest means of procuring one she thought to please her brother
by noticing his bride. So, in her zeal, she rather overdid
the matter, inviting to Sunny Bank many of the villagers,
some of whom were friendly to me and some were not,
though all, I believe, felt curious to see how the “Plebeian
Yankee” (thus Ada termed me) would demean herself as
the wife a southern planter.
Dusky faces, with white shining eyes, peered round the
360corner of the building as the carriage stopped before the
door, and more than one whisper reached me. “Dat’s she—de
new Miss, dat mars’r’s liftin’ so keerfully.”
Upon the piazza stood Mrs. Lansing, her face wreathed in
smiles, while at her side, in flowing white muslin, were Ada
and Lina, the former of whom sprang gaily down the steps,
and with well feigned joy threw herself into the arms of her
guardian, who, after kissing her affectionately, presented her
to me, saying, “Will Ada be a sister to my wife?”
“Anything, for your sake,” answered Ada, with rather
more emphasis on your than was quite pleasing me.
Mrs. Lansing came next, and there was something of hauteur
in her manner as she advanced, for much as she desired
to please her brother, she was not yet fully prepared to meet
me as an equal. But Richard knew the avenue to her heart,
and as he placed my hand in hers, he said, “For the sake of
Jessie you will love my bride, I am sure.”
It was enough; Jessie was forgotten by many who had
wept bitterly when first they heard the sad news of her
death, but in the mother’s heart there was an aching void,
and as if the gentle, blue-eyed child were pleading for me
from her little grave, the proud woman’s eyes were moist
with tears as she said, “Yes, for Jessie’s sake do I l——”
she paused, for with that sacred name upon her lips even she
could not utter a falsehood and say, “I love you,” so she
qualified it, and after a moment continued, “I will learn to
love you, Rose, for such I know would be our angel Jessie’s
wish.”
From Lina I expected no demonstration. She was too selfish,
too listless to care for any one, so when she coolly shook
my hand and called me Mrs. Delafield, I was quite satisfied,
particularly as the next moment Halbert caught me round
the neck, shouting out a noisy, but genuine welcome to his
361“Aunt Rose,” and telling me “he was mighty glad I’d come
back to stay for good.”
“You have quite a party,” said Richard to his sister as
we entered the spacious hall, I shrinking behind him so as to
hide myself from the curious eyes which I knew were scanning
my dusty travelling dress.
“Only a few friends, who I thought would be glad to
meet Miss Lee—I beg pardon—your wife,” she hastily
added as she saw the gathering frown upon his brow.
With a look in his eye which made her quail, he said,
“Never make that mistake again, Angeline.” (And she
never did!) “Rose is too much exhausted to appear in the
parlor to-night,” he continued, as we entered my room—our
room—the pleasant, tasteful apartment, which I once
thought had been fitted up for Ada. “You ought to have
had more tact than to invite company on the first night of
my arrival—when you must have known how weary Rose
would be. She don’t look like herself, so pale and way-worn,”
he continued, himself removing my bonnet and tenderly
stroking my aching head.
Nothing would please Ada better than to present me just
as I was, pale and jaded, with dark rims beneath my eyes,
induced by the severe headache from which I was really
suffering. It would show her own charms to greater advantage,
she thought, as she glanced at an opposite mirror and
saw the contrast between us.
“Oh, Richard,” she said pleadingly, “pray don’t object to
her going down, it wouldn’t be polite, and then they are all
dying to see her.”
“Why then didn’t they, some of them, improve the opportunity
when she was here before, and on show every day,”
said Richard, moodily.
And Ada, forgetting herself, answered in a low tone,
362“Why, that’s plain enough, Mrs. Richard Delafield is a very
different personage from Miss Lee, gov”——
“Ada!” sternly interposed my husband, “Never a remark
like that in my presence.”
“Why, Uncle Dick,” said Ada, smothering her anger and
winding her white arms around his neck, “how you
frighten me. I didn’t mean anything, only I do want Rose
to go down, so much, can’t you, dear?” and she turned
towards me.
With her, I felt that it would hardly be polite to refuse,
so I replied that “after a cup of tea and half an hour’s rest,
I would try to do so.”
Supper was brought to our room, the servant almost
touching her knees to the floor, so low was her obeisance to
the “New Miss.” As I have once before remarked, my head
was aching dreadfully, and as I looked at the soft, downy
pillows which lay piled upon the snowy bed in the adjoining
room, I thought how much rather I would throw myself
among them, than join the gay company below. But it
could not be, and with something like tears in the sound of
my voice, I asked Richard to send up my trunks.
Closely inspecting me for a moment, he answered. “There
is no necessity for you to dress. You look well enough just
as you are, and you must not fatigue yourself any more. I
shall get you excused in a little while, and sometime after
you are thoroughly rested, Angeline shall give a large party
at her own house, where you’ll have an opportunity to display
all the ‘fixins,’” and he laughed, thinking, I suppose,
he had said something smart.
My dress was a dark blue merino, trimmed on the basque
and sleeves with black velvet. It fitted neatly, and was, I
knew, unusually becoming; so after arranging my curls and
donning a clean linen collar, I took my husband’s arm and
363went down to the drawing-room, where I found about forty
people assembled. With a few of them I was already
acquainted, while the majority were only known to me by
sight; for though I had often seen them at Cedar Grove,
they had not thought it worth their while to notice a mere
governess. Now, however, as Ada had said, matters were
changed, and Richard Delafield’s wife could not be slighted
with impunity. Consequently I was for a time overwhelmed
with compliments and attention; some with whom I had
never before spoken, expressing their delight at seeing me
back again, while others said that a bride was just what
was wanting to give éclat to the winter gaieties.
Close to my side kept Ada, assuming a kind of patronizing
manner and answering for me whenever she thought the
conversation beyond my depth. Of course she threw me
quite in the shade, and in a measure she had her reward, for
she, as well as I, heard a lady, a stranger in W——, say,
“How much more beautiful Miss Montrose is than the bride.
I wonder Mr. Delafield did not prefer her.”
There was a look of exultation on Ada’s face as her eyes
met mine, but it passed away as we heard the answer made
by Miss Porter, a lady whom Ada thought exceedingly
aristocratic. “Yes,” said she, “Miss Montrose is rather
pretty, but she is fading fast, and I suppose Mr. Delafield
preferred the freshness of youth to the decay of beauty, and
for my part, I approve his choice, and think her a very
pretty little creature.”
I glanced at my husband—he, too, heard the remark and
it pleased him, I knew, while Ada crossed over to the opposite
side of the room and I saw her no more, for Richard
soon asked for me to be excused; a request which the company
readily granted, saying, “I must of course be tired.”
It was late when Richard came up to our room, and I saw
364in a moment that something was the matter, for his face
wore the dark, hard look it sometimes did when he was disturbed.
I did not then ask the cause of his annoyance, but
afterwards I learned that the moment the guests were gone,
Ada, whose feelings were a good deal ruffled, not only at
the attention I had received, but also at the remark of
Miss Porter, commenced censuring my husband for having
suffered me to appear in the drawing-room in my travelling
dress. “’Twas an insult to the company,” she said, “and
they could excuse it on no other grounds save the supposition
that I was entirely ignorant of etiquette in any form.
I didn’t blame her so much,” said she, “for I suppose
she didn’t know any better, but I was astonished at
you.”
Ada had quite forgotten herself, or else she misunderstood
the man with whom she had to deal. Very
quietly he listened, but the storm was gathering within, and
when she had finished, it burst upon her with a vengeance;
he bidding her never again, either in his presence or the
presence of any one, say aught disparagingly of his wife.
“Her actions shall not be questioned by you,” said he, “and
you shall treat her with deference, for in every respect she
is your superior, save that of age, and there, I admit, you
have the advantage.”
This decided the matter at once, for Ada was afraid of
him, and though she could not conceal her dislike from me,
she was in his presence always kind, considerate and sometimes
even affectionate in her demeanor towards me, coming
at last to call him “Uncle Dick,” in imitation of Halbert,
and me “Aunt Rose,” particularly if there were any strangers
present.
The morning following my arrival I was formally presented
to the servants, who received me with many
365demonstrations of joy, the older portion “bressin’ de Lord
they had lived to see Mars’r Richard look so happy and
peart like as he did with the new Miss.” Only one eyed me
at all askance, and that was Aunt Hagar, the housekeeper,
who saw in me a rival—one who would henceforth wear
jingling at her belt the huge bunch of keys, which for so
long a time had been to her a badge of honor. Then, too,
the old lady, like my other new relatives, had some fears
“that Miss Rose didn’t ‘long to the quality, and that Mars’r
Richard had done histed hisself down a peg or so by marryin’
one who was brought up in de free states, whar dar warn’t
nary nigger to fotch ’em a drink of water or fan when de
sun was roastin’ hot.”
With a look of injured dignity, which made the steeple of
a turban on her head tremble, she undid from her waist the
bunch of keys, and offering them to me, said, “I ’spects these
are yourn now.”
I drew back, for to me there was nothing pleasing in the
idea of being disturbed every time a lump of sugar, a piece
of coal, or a pan of flour was wanted, so I said, “If my
husband is willing I’d rather you’d keep them yourself, as I
know you are trusty.”
Hagar’s face brightened perceptibly and I am induced to
think she forgot in a measure my misfortune in having been
born in a free state! At all events I have not now a more
devoted servant than Hagar, who declares me to be a “perfect
lady,” and who has more than once ventured the treasonable
remark, that “if all de Free State folks is like Miss Rose,
she’ll be boun’ she’d like to live thar!” Regularly each
morning she comes to me and asks “what Miss would like for
dinner,” and regularly each morning “Miss” answers, “Dear
me, Hagar, I don’t know; get what you like:” feeling
confident the while that the programme is already made out
366and that any material suggestion from me would be superfluous.
So much for mistress and slave.
With his usual generosity, my husband made all of the
negroes presents in honor of his marriage; offering for Bill’s
acceptance a silver watch, which he had purchased for him
in Charleston. Taking the timepiece in his hand, Bill examined
it attentively, held it to his ear, put it in his pocket,
looked at the key, and then handing it back to his master,
said, “no ‘fence, mars’r, but if you please thar’s somethin’
I’d like better.”
“Very well, what is it?” asked Richard; and Bill answered,
“Why, you see, Mars’r, how dem hosses, Fred and Ferd, has
never had proper ’spect showed to thar memory. To be
sure, I wars a weed on my hat and I ’fused to gine in de
dance t’odder night, but that’s nothin’. Ferd had too high
blood in him to keer for an ole nigger’s mournin’, and what
I wants is for you to paint de stable black, and that I reckons
will show ’em proper ’tention. What do you say, Miss
Rose?”
As the horses had fallen in my cause, I readily espoused
Bill’s project for the novelty of the thing, if nothing else;
and should any one of my readers visit Sunny Bank, which
I wish they may, they will see the stables wearing a hue
as dark as Bill himself, who has now a pair of iron-greys,
which he calls “Richard” and “Rose,” notwithstanding
that both are of the masculine gender. These, particularly
the latter, are the pride of Bill’s heart, and when the year
of mourning has expired, he intends, he says, to have the
stable painted “yaller,” that being the color of a young
girl who has lately made sad havoc with his affections!
Here I may as well say that Mrs. Lansing managed until
she procured the desired piano, which came in company with
another, a much nicer one, on the front of which was
367inscribed “Rose, from her husband.” In return for her
brother’s gift, Mrs. Lansing made a large party, where I
had an opportunity of wearing my bridal dress, together
with a costly set of diamonds, which I found upon my table,
when I went up to make my toilet. It did not need the
simple word “Richard” on a bit of paper to tell me whence
they came, and the tears started to my eyes when I thought
how kind he was, while I was conscious of a glow of pride,
when I saw little Rosa Lee flashing with diamonds, which
encircled her arms and neck, and shone among the curls of
her hair. Bertha, my tasteful waiting maid—for I am getting
quite southernized—pronounced me beautiful, as she
gave the finishing stroke to my toilet, while one, for whose
judgment I cared still more, and who all the time had been
conning his evening paper, apparently oblivious to the presence
of white satin, point lace, orange flowers and diamonds,
responded, “Yes, Bertha, your young mistress is beautiful.”
Dress does make a vast deal of difference in one’s looks,
and if that night two-thirds of the three hundred particular
friends, whose hands I shook, pronounced me “beautiful,
handsome, charming, lovely,” and all that, it was owing
chiefly, I think, to the fitness of my robes, and the brilliancy
of my diamonds. These last were the subject of much
remark, they being the finest which had ever been worn in
W——, Ada very good-naturedly saying, “she hoped my
good fortune wouldn’t quite turn my head!”
Mrs. Lansing’s party was followed by many more, and ere
I was aware of it Mrs. Richard Delafield was quite a belle—what
she said, what she did, and what she wore being pronounced
au fait by the fashionables of W——. Upon all
this Ada looked jealously; never allowing an opportunity to
pass without speaking slightingly of me, though always careful
that Richard should not know of it. In his presence she
368was vastly kind, sitting at my feet, calling me “Aunty,”
and treating me as if I had been twenty years her senior.
At first she spent much more of her time at Sunny Bank
than was at all agreeable to me, and I was not sorry when a
little incident occurred which in a measure tended to keep
her away. She had always been in the habit of treating
my husband with a great show of affection, and now that he
was, as she said, “an old married man,” she seemed to think
it no matter how much she caressed him. Even I dared not
seat myself upon his knee as coolly as she would, and her
temerity troubled me, particularly as I knew it was annoying
to him. This I must have manifested in some way, for one
morning, when as usual she entered our room without knocking,
and perched herself on Richard’s knee, he pushed her
off, saying, half in earnest, half in jest, “Don’t act so foolish,
Ada, you make me sick, for now that I have Rose to pet
me I can easily dispense with your caresses, which are rather
too much of a good thing.”
Ada was angry, and with a little hateful laugh, she said,
turning to me, “jealous, I suppose, and have read your better half
a lecture on propriety. When I marry, I trust I
shall have faith enough in my husband’s love for me, not to
care even if he does chance to look at some one else.”
I knew Richard would vindicate my cause, so I remained
silent while he answered, “You do Rose injustice, for never
have we exchanged a word concerning the manner you have
assumed towards me, and which I should suppose your own
sense of propriety would condemn. Were you my wife,
’twould be different.”
“Your wife,” interrupted Ada, with bitter scorn, “I am
not your wife, thank fortune, neither did I ever aspire to be,
and I have yet to see the man whom I would for a moment
think of marrying.”
369There was not the slightest cause for this speech, but Ada
was angry; and, as if to exasperate her still more, Richard
coolly asked, “Didn’t you think of marrying Herbert Langley
when you engaged yourself to him?”
He had heard the whole story at Meadow Brook, but this
was the first time he had hinted it to Ada, who turned very
pale and without another word left the room, going back to
Cedar Grove, where for three weeks she pouted and cried
alternately. At the end of that time, however, she concluded
it better to “make up” so she wrote a note to us both,
asking my pardon for her rudeness and begging my husband
to forgive her for the many falsehoods she had told concerning
her engagement with Herbert, which she now frankly confessed.
Of course we forgave her, and as she was not one
who remembered anything long, she soon began to visit us
as of old, though she no longer sat on my husband’s knee,
or wound her arms around his neck. His rebuke did her
good, and she profited by it, while the fact that he was fully
aware of the deception she had practised tended to humble
her, and on rainy days, when Richard was necessarily away
from home, I found her quite an agreeable companion.
Thus the winter and spring passed away, and my mother’s
letters began to grow urgent for my return, but for various
reasons Richard did not think it advisable for me to under
take so long a journey, and as Sunny Bank was all the world
to me, I very cheerfully consented to wait until another
season ere I visited my New England home. About this
time I was again seized with my olden desire for authorship,
induced in a measure by my knowing how much Mrs. Lansing
reverenced anything which savored of a book-writer.
To be an authoress, then, and make her proud to own me as
her sister, was a subject over which I grew pale and “nervous,”
Richard said, while the negroes called me “fidgety”
370and wondered “what done ailded Miss Rose.” At last, after
many wakeful nights and restless days, after sick headaches,
nervous headaches, and all kind of headaches, the plan was
marked out for a story. I would be the heroine myself and
give to the world as much of my history as I thought proper,
and if I failed—if no railroad, steamboat, or stagecoach
passenger ever pointed me out as “the woman who wrote that
book,” or if my publishers “respectfully declined” another
bearing my signature, I thought I should still have the
satisfaction of knowing I had tried to benefit the world, and
I felt almost sure that in Meadow Brook at least there were
people stupid enough to buy my book and possibly to like
it, just because little Rosa Lee, who used to climb fences
and hunt hen’s eggs with them in her childish days, had
written it. So, one sunny morning in June, when my husband
had left me to be gone for two weeks, I shut myself
up in my room, donned a loose wrapper, tucked back my
curls, opened my writing desk, took out a quire of foolscap,
and had just written “MEADOW BROOK,” when the bell rang
and Bertha announced “a lady in the parlor.” With a
deep sigh, as I thought how “WE writers disliked to be disturbed,”
I arranged my curls, resumed my cambric morning
gown, and went down to receive my visitor, telling her that
I was very well, that the weather was very warm, that I
expected to be very lonely without my husband, that her
bonnet was very pretty, that I didn’t think negroes as annoying
and hateful as she did, after which she took her leave;
and I went back to my room, this time locking the door
and writing the first chapter of my book before the bell rang
for dinner.
To Bertha I imparted my secret, reading to her each page
as I wrote it, and though she was not, perhaps, the most
appreciating auditor one could have, she was certainly the
371most attentive and approving. It is true she objected to
my describing myself as such a homely child. “Jest tell
de truffe and done wid it,” she said; whereupon I assured
her that I had told the truth, and then she suggested that
in order to make amends for my ugliness I should represent
myself as having been “peart like and smart.” So, if the
reader thinks I have made myself too precocious, the fault
is chargeable to Bertha, for I did it to please her!
For two weeks I wrote, scarcely allowing myself a
moment’s rest, and Bertha, who, when she saw how it wore
upon me, began at last to expostulate. “Thar wasn’t no
’casion,” she said, “to kill myself, when thar was heaps ’o
niggers kickin’ round under foot, and if miss ’sisted on
writin’ a book, why didn’t she make some dem lazy critters
do it for her!”
At the end of two weeks Richard returned, asking me as
he looked in my face “what was the matter, and how I had
spent my time?”
Before I could answer, Bertha, who was quite incensed
against my book, said, “she’s done writin’ a spellin’ book, or
somethin’, and sits up ’most all night. I tell her how ’twill
kill her, but she pay no ’tention!”
The secret was out, and with many blushes I plead guilty,
and producing my manuscript, watched Richard while he
read it. Over the first chapter, where he thought I was
going to die, he cried—or that is, tears came to his eyes;
the third he skipped partially, the next entirely, and the next
and the next (I hope the reader has not done likewise); but
when he found Dr. Clayton he read every word, his forehead
tying itself up in knots, which, however, cleared away the
moment he came upon himself at the theatre, though I
believe he didn’t feel much complimented by my description
of his personal appearance!
372There, just as he was introduced, the story ended, and fortunate
was it for me that it did so, for he declared I should
not write another word after I got through with him; and I
promised that I wouldn’t, mentally resolving that it should
be some time before I reached that point. This then, my
reader, is the reason why I said no more of him, when first
I presented him to your notice, but left him for a while in
mystery. I knew Richard was anxious to hear what did
become of himself, and I fancied that if I wrote considerable
before I said anything very definite of him, he would be more
likely to let me finish the book, as he would not wish me to
waste so much paper for nothing! And the sequel proved
that I was right. Regularly each day I wrote, Richard
always stopping me the moment he thought I was tired, and
invariably breaking me off in the wrong place, so if there
should be any parts of my story which do not join together
smoothly, you may know it was there that Richard took my
pen from my hand, or hid the inkstand.
Towards the middle of August, invitations came for us to
attend a large wedding in Charleston. I was exceedingly
anxious to go, having heard much of the bride, who was a
distant relative of my husband, and though both he and Mrs.
Lansing raised every conceivable objection to my leaving
home, I adroitly put aside all their arguments, and ere Richard
fully realized that he had been coaxed into doing something
he had fully determined not to do, we were rattling
along in a dusty Charleston omnibus towards one of the
largest hotels, where rooms had been engaged for us. The
morning after our arrival, I went into the public parlor,
and as I seated myself at the piano I saw just across the room,
near an open window, a quiet, intelligent-looking lady, apparently
twenty-six or twenty-seven years of age, and near
her sporting upon the carpet, was a beautiful little girl,
373with flowing curls and soft dark eyes, which instantly riveted
my attention, they were so like something I had seen before.
At the sound of the music she came to my side, listening
attentively, and when I had finished, she laid one white,
chubby hand on my lap and the other on the keys, saying,
“please play again, Rose like to hear you.”
“And so your name is Rose?” I answered, “Rose what?”
“Rosa Lee Clayton, and that’s my new ma,” she replied,
pointing towards the lady, whose usually pale cheek was for
an instant suffused with a blush such as brides only wear.
I knew now why I had felt interested in the child. It was
the father which I saw looking at me through the eyes of
brown, and taking the little creature in my arms, I was
about to question her of her sire, when an increasing glow
on the lady’s cheek and a footstep in the hall told me he was
coming!
The next moment he stood before me, Dr. Clayton! his
face perfectly unruffled and wearing an expression of content,
at least, if not perfect happiness. I was conscious of
a faintness stealing over me, but by a strong effort I shook
it off, and rising to my feet, I offered him my hand, which
he pressed, saying, “This is indeed a surprise, Rose—I beg
your pardon, Mrs. Delafield, I suppose?”
I nodded in the affirmative, and was about to say something
more, when another footstep approached, and my husband’s
tall figure darkened the doorway. For an instant
they both turned pale, and Dr. Clayton grasped the piano
nervously; but the shock soon passed away, and then as
friend meets friend after a brief separation, so met these
two men, who but the year before had watched together
over my pillow, praying, the one that I might live, and the
other that I might die.
Wonderingly the little girl looked up into her father’s
374face, and pulling the skirt of my dress, said, “Who is the
lady, pa? with the pretty curls so much like mine?”
Never before, I believe, did I like Dr. Clayton as I did at
that moment when I saw the deep tenderness which broke over
his features as he took his daughter in his arms, and pressing
his lips to her forehead, answered, “It is Rosa Lee, my child,
the lady for whom you were named.”
“Don’t you love her, pa? I do,” she asked, stretching her
little fat arms towards me.
I glanced at my husband—his brow was dark as midnight.
I looked at Dr. Clayton, there was a slight quivering of his
lips, while his wife was pale as a water lily, and then I burst
into a merry laugh, in which the gentlemen soon joined,
though it would have puzzled us all to have told at what we
were laughing.
After a few words of explanation as to why we were
there, Dr. Clayton suddenly remembered himself, and leading
me towards the lady, introduced her as “My wife, Mrs.
Clayton.” She had been living in Florida with a cousin, at
whose house they were married, about two weeks before, and
they were now on their way to Boston, stopping for a few days
in Charleston to see the city. I found her a very quiet, sensible
woman, but as different from Dell Thompson, or Rosa
Lee, as a person well could be, and I was wondering to myself
how it was possible for a man to love so many people
of opposite temperaments, when she said something about
New England, and I asked if she were ever there.
“Oh, yes,” she answered, “I was born there, in Wilbraham,
Mass. I was living with the grandmother of the first
Mrs. Clayton at the time of her death.”
In a moment it all came to me; Dell had told me of Mabel
Warrener, who had inherited her grandmother’s fortune, and
now she sat there before me, Mrs. Clayton 2d. Surely the freaks
375of fortune are wonderful! Naturally refined and intelligent,
Mabel had employed a part of her money in giving herself
a good education, graduating at Mount Holyoke Female
Seminary, and going thence back to her home in Wilbraham,
which she had fitted up with much taste, and where she was
living when Dr. Clayton met her on his return from Georgia.
Of her then he only thought as of a pleasant, agreeable woman;
but when time, absence, and my marriage had softened
the keenness of his disappointment, he often found his
thoughts wandering towards the fair Mabel, who, upon inquiry,
he learned had gone to Florida. Rose needed a
mother, and he needed a wife; so, after an interchange of
letters, he one morning started with his little girl for the
“land of flowers,” where neither sickness, nor death, nor
yet a Richard Delafield, came between him and his bride.
They seemed very happy, for after a little Dr. Clayton recovered
his equanimity, and appeared perfectly natural.
Not a word, however, did he say of the past, or in any
way allude to Georgia, except once when he asked me if I
did not think Rose resembled Jessie in a measure. I had
thought of the same thing, though Rosa’s eyes were darker
and her hair more of a chestnut brown. She was a sweet
little creature, and if anything could have reconciled me to
being the wife of Dr. Clayton, it would have been the fact
that she was my daughter. But as I contrasted the two
men, as my eye fell on Dr. Clayton’s handsome face and curly
locks, and then rested on the dark features and raven hair
of Richard, I felt that in him there was more of the true, the
noble man, and my heart warmly approved me for the choice I
had made.
Nearly all the morning we sat there talking on indifferent
subjects, and when dinner was over, Mrs. Clayton came to
376my room, staying a long time, and gaining fast in my good
opinion, when I saw how kind and friendly she was. She
had heard the whole story, for she told me so, holding little
Rose upon her lap and smoothing her silken curls.
“We cannot all love the same person,” she said in conclusion;
“and I am so glad you refused him, for otherwise
he would not have been my husband;” and her quiet eyes
lighted up with a look of happiness which plainer than words
could express told me that she had brought to Dr. Clayton
no divided affections.
At the making of my toilet for the wedding she was present,
aiding Bertha greatly by her own tasteful suggestions,
and when at last I was dressed with perfect childish simplicity,
she ran for her husband “to come and see if I didn’t
look pretty.”
“Mrs. Delafield was always pretty to me,” was the doctor’s
answer, and that was all he said.
They were to leave early next morning before I would be
up, and so when the carriage was announced, we went to bid
them good-bye.
“May I kiss your wife?” asked the doctor of my husband,
as he held my hand.
“Certainly, sir,” answered Richard, “an even exchange
is always fair,” and instead of once, he kissed the blushing
Mabel twice, which of course gave Dr. Clayton liberty to do
the same by me.
Suddenly remembering something which I had left in my
room, I went up for it, and on my way back glanced into
the parlor, occupied by Dr. Clayton. He was seated upon the
sofa by the side of his wife, around whose waist his arm was
affectionately thrown, while partly on his lap and partly
upon that of her step-mother was little Rose, her long eyelashes
377drooping sleepily over her eyes of brown. It was a
beautiful tableau, and whenever I think of Dr. Clayton now,
it is as I last saw him, happy and contented, for he has not
only won a most excellent wife, but also secured that $10,000
after all!
CHAPTER XXXII. NOVEMBER 25TH.
378
Dear Reader,
Just one year ago to-night the orange wreath and bridal
veil were twined among my curls, and with a loving heart I
stood up before the man of God and took upon myself the
vows, which made me Richard’s forever. The orange flowers
are faded now, and the bridal veil looks soiled and worn;
but the sunlight of happiness which shone upon me when
first he called me his wife has grown brighter and brighter
as each day has unfolded to me some new virtue which I
knew not that he possessed when, he became my husband.
No shadow, however slight, has ever fallen between us,
for though he has a fiery temper and an indomitable will,
they are both under perfect control, and so much confidence
have I in his love for me, that should I ever in any way come
in collision with his temper or his will, I have faith to believe
I could bend the one and subdue the other. Every comfort
and luxury which affection can dictate or money procure has
been gathered around me, until my home seems to me a
second paradise.
The fervid heat of summer has passed, and the hazy light
which betokens the fall of the leaf has come. On the northern
hills, they say, the November snows have already fallen,
but we are still basking in the soft sunlight of a most glorious
379autumn; and as I write, the south wind comes in through
the open window, whispering to me of the fading flowers,
whose perfume it gathered as it floated along. Just opposite
me, in a willow chair, with her head buried in a towering
turban of royal purple, sits Juno, a middle aged woman,
nodding to the breeze, which occasionally brushes past her
so fast that she lazily opens her eyes, and with her long-heeled
foot gives a jog to the rosewood crib, wherein lies sleeping a
little tiny thing which was left here five weeks ago to-day.
Oh, how odd and funny it seemed when Richard first laid on
my arm a little bundle of cambric and lace, and whispered
in my ear, “Would you like to see our baby?” She is a
great pet, and should this book never reach so far as Georgia,
Mrs. Lansing, I am sure, will like me all the same, for
her words and manner have been very kind since the morning
when I said to Richard, “We will call our baby Jessie.”
So Jessie was she baptized, Mrs. Lansing’s tears falling
like rain on the face of the unconscious child, which she
folded to her bosom as tenderly as if it had indeed been her
own lost Jessie come back to her again. Upon Ada the
arrival of the stranger produced a novel effect, overwhelming
her with such a load of modesty that she kept out of
Richard’s way nearly two weeks, and never once came to see
me until I was sitting up in my merino morning gown, which
she had embroidered for me herself. Ada has a very nice
sense of propriety!
But little more remains for me to say, and that I must say
briefly. I am determined to finish my story, and as my husband
for the first time since my illness has left me alone for
an hour or two, I am improving the opportunity, having first
bribed Bertha to bring me my writing materials, by promising
her a dress which she has long coveted.
The royal purple turban by the window has become somewhat
380displaced by the strong west wind, and now wide
awake, begins to grumble at “Miss Rosy’s impudence in ’xertin’
herself to write trash which is of no kind o’ count, and
which no human will ever read.”
I hope her prediction is a false one, for I have lately conceived
the idea of devoting the entire proceeds of this book
to the benefit of Rosa Lee, who, of course, has no part in
the $10,000 which her father has married!
There is a rustling in the crib—the baby is waking, and
at my request Juno brings her to me, saying as she lays her
on my lap, “She’s the berry pictur’ of t’other Jessie,” and
as her soft blue eyes unclose and my hand rests on her curly
hair which begins to look golden in the sunlight, I, too,
think the same, and with a throbbing heart I pray the
Father to save her from the early death which came to our
lost darling—“Jessie, the angel of the Pines.”
Rose Delafield.
FINIS.
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ANECDOTES OF TRAVEL,
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THE LIFE, TRAVELS, LABORS AND WRITINGS
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TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES
Silently corrected obvious typographical errors and variations in spelling.
Retained archaic, non-standard, and uncertain spellings as printed.