I think I saw the dawn that day on which the ball was to be.
Whether I did or not, the morning was still very gray and cold when
I crept out of my bed and stole to the wardrobe to look at our two
dresses. There they hung, carefully displayed upon shifting pegs
such as were used in old-fashioned presses: one soft white muslin;
the other of that pale apple-green shot silk which had belonged to
mother in the days of her youth, and which I had been allowed to
make up for the occasion. We had worked at them for days.
Joyce was clever at dress-making: she was clever at all things that
needed deftness of fingers. She had fitted me with my frock, and
we had both worked together. But now the dresses were finished,
the last ruffle had been tacked in; there was nothing more to do,
and the day wore away very slowly till evening.
At last the hour came when it was time to dress, and such a washing
of faces and brushing of hair as went on in that little attic
chamber for half an hour no one would believe.
Joyce insisted on "finishing" me first. She coiled up my hair at
the back of my head, brushing it as neatly as she could, and laying
it in two thick bands on either side of my temples. It never will
look very neat, it is such vigorous unruly hair, this red hair of mine,
and to this day always has tendrils escaping here and there over
forehead and neck. But she did her best for it, and I was pleased
with myself. I was still more pleased with myself when I got on
the green shot silk with the lace ruffles. Joyce said she was surprised
to see what a change it made in me. So was I.
My skin was very pink and white wherever it was not spoiled by
freckles, and the green of the frock seemed to show it up and make
the red lips look redder than ever. It is true that my neck and
arms were frail still with the frailness of youth, but then my figure
was slim too, and my eyes were black with excitement, and shone
till they were twice their usual size. I thought, as I looked in the
glass, that I was not so very plain. Yes, I was right when I had
begged the shot silk. Joyce could wear anything, but I, who was
no "fine bird" by nature, needed the "fine feathers."
I was pleased with myself, and I smiled with satisfaction when
Joyce declared again that she was quite surprised to see what a good
appearance I had. "If you would only keep yourself tidy, Margaret,
you have no idea how much better you would look," said she.
It was what Deborah was always saying, but I did not resent it
from Joyce—she was gentle in her way of saying it; and I remember
that I promised I would brush my hair smooth in future, and wear
my collars more daintily. I do not believe that I kept to my resolution,
but that evening I was not at all the Margaret of every-day
life as I surveyed myself in the glass.
"But come," said I, hurriedly—half ashamed of myself, I do believe—"we
shall be late if we don't make haste. Do get on, Joyce."
Joyce began brushing out her long golden hair—real gold hair,
not faint flaxen—and coiled the smooth, shining bands of it round
her little head. It was a little head, such as I have seen in the pictures
of the Virgins painted by Italian painters of long ago.
"I sha'n't be long," said she.
I sat down and watched her. She would not have let me help
her if I had wanted to do so. She would have said that I should
only disarrange myself, and that I should be of no use. Certainly
nothing was wanted but what she did for herself, and she did it
quickly enough. When she stood up before the mirror—tipped
back to show the most of her person, for we had no pier-glasses at
the Grange—I do not believe that any one could have found a thing
to improve in her. Her figure looked taller and slenderer than ever
in the long white dress, and the soft little folds of the muslin clung
tenderly around her delicate shape, just leaving bare her neck and
arms, that were firm and white as alabaster. Her face was flushed
as a May rose; her lips were parted in her anxiety to hasten, and
showed the little even white teeth within. Her blue eyes were clear
and soft under the black lashes.
She moved before the glass to see that her dress was not too
long, and bent back her slender throat, upon which she had just
clasped mother's delicate little old-fashioned gold necklace with the
drops of yellow beryl-stone. It was the only bit of good jewellery
in the family, and Joyce always wore it, it became her so well.
"Come now, Meg," said she, "I am quite ready. Let's go and
see if we can do anything to help mother."
We went down-stairs. Deborah was there in mother's room
waiting to survey us all. She had just fastened mother's dove-colored
satin gown that had served her for every party she had been
at since she was married. Mother had just the same shaped cap on
that she always wore; she never would alter it for any fashion, but
that night the frill of it was made of beautiful old lace that she
kept in blue paper and lavender all the rest of the year. I thought
she looked splendid, but Joyce was not so easily pleased.
"Dear mother, you really must have another gown before you go
anywhere again," said she, shaking out the skirt with a dissatisfied
air. "This satin has lost all its stiffness."
Mother looked at it a little anxiously herself, I remember, when
Joyce said this. We considered Joyce a judge of dress and the
fashions, and of course the squire's ball was a great occasion. But
she said she thought it did very well for an old lady, and indeed so
did I, although that may perhaps have been because I was very anxious
to be off.
Dear mother! I do not think she gave much thought to herself;
she was taken up with pride in us. Yes, I do believe that night she
was proud even of me.
She smiled when Deborah, with her hand on the door-knob, said,
patronizingly, that although she did not hold with bare arms and
necks for modest females, she never would have thought that I
should have "dressed up" so well. Mother bade her begone, but I
think she was pleased.
"Dear me!" said she, looking at me. "I recollect buying that
silk. It must have been in '52, when father took me up to town
to see the Exhibition. It was cheap for the good silk it is. It has
made up very well."
She turned me all round. Then she went to her jewel-case, unlocked
it, and took out a row of red coral beads.
"That's what you want with that dress," said she, fastening them
round my throat. "And you shall have them for your own. Red-haired
women ought to wear coral, folk say. Though for my part,
I always thought it was putting on too many colors."
How well I remember my pleasure at that gift! Joyce wanted
to persuade me not to wear them; she said the pale green of the
frock was prettier without the red beads. But I wouldn't listen to
her; I was too pleased with them, and I do not believe that it was
entirely owing to gratified vanity; I think a little of it was pleasure
that mother thought my appearance worth caring for.
I should not have thought it worth caring for myself two days
ago, and I should not have cared whether mother did or not. But
something had happened to me. Was it the sight of Joyce and her
lover that had made me think of myself as a woman? I cannot tell.
All I know is that when we walked into the squire's ball-room a
quarter of an hour afterwards, I felt my face flame as I saw his gaze
rest upon me for a moment, and I longed most heartily to be back
again in my high-necked homespun frock, with no corals round my
throat at all. So inconsistent are we at nineteen!
Fortunately my awakening self-consciousness was soon put to
flight by other more engrossing emotions. There was a fair sprinkling
of people already when we got into the room, and more were
arriving every moment. Mr. Farnham and the maiden sister with
whom he lived were going busily about welcoming the squire's
guests almost as though they were the host and hostess themselves:
he was the Conservative member. A quiet, inoffensive old gentleman
himself, who would have been nothing and nobody without the
squire; but blessed with a most officious lady for relative, who took
the whole neighborhood under her wing.
She rather annoyed me by the way she had of trading on the
squire's support of her brother. He supported her brother because
he was a Conservative, not at all because he was Mr. Farnham, or
even Miss Farnham's brother.
Poor Mr. Broderick, I dare say, if the truth had been known, he
must often heartily have longed to get rid of them. But the old
thing was a good soul in her way, if it was a dictatorial, loud-voiced
way, and was very active among the poor, although it was not always
in the manner which they liked.
She and mother invariably quarrelled over the advantages of soup-kitchens
and clothing clubs; for mother was every bit as obstinate
as Miss Farnham, and being an old-fashioned woman, liked to do
her charity in a more personal fashion.
I looked with mingled awe and amusement upon their meeting
to-night. Miss Farnham had an aggressive sort of head-dress, with
nodding artificial flowers that seemed to look down scornfully upon
mother's old lace and soft frills. She had not seen me for some
time, and when mother introduced me as her youngest daughter, she
took my hand firmly in hers, and held it a while in her uncompromising
grip while she looked at me through and through.
"Well, I never saw such a thing in my life!" exclaimed she presently,
in a loud voice that attracted every one's attention.
I blushed. I was not given to blushing, but it was enough to
make any one blush. I thought, of course, that she was alluding to
my attire, in which I had felt so shy and awkward from the moment
that I had entered the ball-room, from the moment that I had
felt the squire's glance rest upon my neck and arms.
She dropped my hand.
"The very image of him," said she, turning to my mother.
"Yes, she is very like her father," agreed the mother.
"Why, my dear, the very image of him," repeated the aggravating
creature. "Got his temper too?" asked she, turning to me again.
"I don't know, ma'am, I'm sure," answered I, half amused, but still
more annoyed. "I dare say."
"Oh, I'll be bound you have, and proud of it too," declared she,
shaking her head emphatically. "Girls are always proud to be like
their fathers."
"I don't suppose it'll make any very particular difference who I'm
like," said I. "Things will happen just the same, I expect."
Miss Farnham laughed and patted me boisterously on the back.
I do not think she was an ill-natured woman, although she certainly
had the talent of making one feel very uncomfortable.
"Well, you're not so handsome as your sister," added she. "But
I don't know that you hadn't better thank your stars for that."
With that she turned away from me and sat down beside mother,
arranging her dress comfortably over her knees as though she meant
to stay there the whole evening.
The people kept coming fast now. The squire stood at the door
shaking hands as hard as he could. There was the old village doctor
with his pretty granddaughter, and the young village doctor
who had inherited the practice, and had just married a spry little
wife in the hope of making it more important.
And then there was the widow of an officer, who lived in a solid
brick house that stood at the corner of the village street, and had
two sons in the ship business in town. And there was the mild-eyed
clergyman with his delicate young wife, who had more than
enough babies of her own, and was only too thankful to leave the
babies of the parish to Miss Farnham or any one else who would
mother them.
She was a sweet little woman, with a transparently white face and
soft silky hair, and she wore her wedding-dress to-night, without the
slightest regard to the fact that it was made in a somewhat elaborate
fashion of six years back, and was not exactly suited to her figure at
that particular moment. She sat down between mother and Miss
Farnham, and must have been considerably cheered by that lady's
remark to the effect that she looked as if she ought to be in her
bed, and that if she did not retire to it she would most likely soon
be in her grave.
I left mother and went up to greet Mary Thorne, who had just
come in with her father. He was a great, strong, florid man,
rather shaky about his h's, but very much the reverse of shaky in
any other way; shrewd and keen as a sharp knife or an east wind.
I don't know that I ever spoke to him but this once in my life.
Father had such an overpowering aversion to him that we were not
allowed to keep even the daughter's acquaintance long after this,
but he made that impression on me: that there was only one soft
spot in him, and that for the motherless girl, who was the only person
allowed to contradict him.
She contradicted him now.
The squire had gone up to receive them bluntly enough, even I
could see; but the squire might be allowed to have an aversion to
the man who was going in as a Radical to contest his Conservative's
long-occupied seat, though indeed I believe his dislike to the manufacturer
was quite as much, because he had bought up one of the
old places in the neighborhood with money earned in business. I
fancy the Thornes were only invited that night as old friends of
Frank Forrester's, and I don't think Frank was thanked for the
necessity.
"You must have had a rare job, Broderick, lighting this old place
up," he was saying as I came up; "all this dark oak, so gloomy
looking!"
"Oh, papa, how can you!" laughed his daughter. "Why, it's what
everybody admires; it's the great sight of the whole neighborhood."
"Yes, yes; I know, my dear," answered Mr. Thorne; "you mean
to say that we should like to live here ourselves. Well, yes, I should
have bought the place if it had been in the market, but—"
"But you would have done it up," broke in the squire, bristling
all over; "whereas there's been nothing new in the Manor since—"
He stopped.
I fancied that he was going to say, "Since I brought my bride
home;" but he said, after a pause, "since my father died."
"Well, to be sure, I do like a bit of brightness and color," acknowledged
Thorne, whose fine house, although in excellent taste,
was decidedly ornate and splendid; "and it is more suited to festal
occasions."
"There, papa, you know nothing about it," declared Mary, emphatically.
"I declare I never saw the Manor look better. Those
flags and garlands are beautiful."
"Oh, my nephew Frank did all that," answered the squire, carelessly;
"he likes that sort of thing."
"Captain Forrester?" repeated the girl, with just a little smile on
her frank, fresh face. "Well, it does him credit then. It isn't every
one would take so much trouble."
"He likes taking trouble," said I. "Just look at the trouble that
he has taken over our concert."
"He likes playing first-fiddle," laughed Miss Thorne, gayly, her
rosy face—that was too rosy for prettiness, although not too rosy
for the perfection of health—flushing rosier than ever as she said it;
"I always tell him so."
I did not answer. Mr. Thorne and his daughter moved on, and I
looked round the room in search of the captain. The place did look
very beautiful, although I do not think that I should like now to
see its severe proportions and splendid wood wainscoting disfigured
by flags and garlands. We were dancing in what used long ago to
be the monks' refectory. The house had been built on the site of
a part of the monastic buildings belonging to the abbey, and this
portion of the old edifice had been retained, while the remainder of
the house was in Tudor style. I heard the squire explaining it to
the new parson, who had lately come to the next parish. I had
heard him explain it before, or I do not suppose that I should have
known anything at all about it.
"I suppose you consider it shocking to be dancing in any part
of the monastery?" I could hear him say, laughing; "but it isn't
so bad as a friend of mine who gives balls in what used to be the
chapel."
The parson was a young man, with a sallow, shaven face and very
refined features; the expression of his mouth was gentle, almost
tremulous, but his eyes were dark and penetrating.
"I'm not quite so prejudiced as that," he said, laughing also,
"although I do wear the cloth."
"That's right," said the squire, heartily. "We have the remains
of a thirteenth-century chapel of the purest period in the grounds,
and we don't desecrate that even by a school-feast. You must come
and see it in the day-time."
Father came up at that moment. He was dreadfully like a fish
out of water, poor father, in this assembly, and looked it. The
squire, in a hasty fashion, introduced him to the Rev. Cyril Morgan,
and passed on to shake hands with a portly wine-merchant, who had
lately retired from business in the neighboring town, and had taken
one of the solid red-brick houses that were the remnants of our own
town's affluence.
This gentleman introduced his wife, and she had to be introduced
to the company, and the host's hands were full. Father moved
away with the parson. He looked rather disgusted at first, but the
young man looked at him with a smile upon his gentle mouth and
in his dark eyes, and said, diffidently, "I have heard a great deal of
you, Mr. Maliphant—the whole neighborhood rings with your name.
I am proud to meet you."
Of course, I liked that young man at once, and as I went to sit
down again beside the mother and Joyce, I was pleased to see across
the room that father and the Rev. Cyril Morgan had entered upon
a conversation. But, to tell the truth, I soon forgot him; I was too
busy looking about me.
I could not help wondering where Captain Forrester could be,
and I was quite angry with Joyce for being so dignified and seeming
to care so little. She seemed to be quite engrossed with the
Hoad girls, who sailed in, followed by their father, just late enough
to be fashionable, and to secure a good effect for their smart new
frocks.
I am afraid I was not gracious to the Hoads. I could not be so
gracious as Joyce, who took all their patronizing over the concert
in the utmost good faith. I turned away from them, and continued
my search for Joyce's admirer. I disliked them, and I am
afraid that I showed it.
But they passed on, Bella, who was the better-looking of the two,
pursued by two town-bred youths asking for a place on her card;
Jessie, the elder, talking with an old lady of title from the seaport
town, who wished her to sing at a charity concert.
They seemed to be very much engrossed; nevertheless, when presently
the band struck up the first waltz, they, as well as many other
people in the room, turned round to look who was dancing it. They
put up their long-handled eye-glasses and fairly stared; for, as soon
as the music began, the squire had walked up to my sister and had
asked her to open the ball with him.
Mother blushed with pleasure and triumph; her dear blue eyes
positively shone. She did not say a word, but I know that if she
had spoken she would have said that she was not surprised.
I was not surprised either, but I was very much annoyed, and I
was not at all in a good temper with Captain Forrester when, two
minutes afterwards, he appeared coming out of the conservatory with
Mary Thorne upon his arm. What had he been about? No wonder
that his face clouded when he saw that he was too late. But it
was his own fault; I was not a bit sorry for him. Mary Thorne was
laughing and looking up half-defiantly in his face. She looked as
if she were saying one of those rough blunt things of which she
was so fond; and she might well say one at this moment to Captain
Forrester, although I scarcely supposed it could be on the topic on
which he deserved it.
Could she possibly be chaffing him on having missed the first
dance with my sister? No; for she had had no opportunity of
noticing his devotion to her. She dropped his arm and nodded to
him merrily, as much as to bid him leave her—as much as to say
that she knew there might be better sport elsewhere. And after a
word in reply to what she had said, he did leave her and came across
to me.
There was a troubled, preoccupied look on his bright face, which
was scarcely accounted for by the fact that he had missed a dance
with Joyce. He greeted me and sat down beside me without
even asking after father. We sat and watched Joyce float round
in the strong grasp of the squire, but I do not think that we were
either of us quite so pleased at the sight as was mother, upon whose
face was joy unalloyed.
She was simply genuinely proud that the squire should have
opened the ball with her daughter. I think she would have
been proud of it had there been no deeper hopes at the bottom of
her heart. But there were deeper hopes, and as I watched Joyce
that night I remembered them.
In the excitement of watching the romance that I had fancied developing
itself more quickly and more decisively than I had even
hoped, I had at first quite forgotten my fears about the squire wanting
to marry Joyce. They had not occurred to my mind at all until
that afternoon two days ago, when he had talked so vehemently
about Frank's position. But now, as I watched him with her, the
notion which I had rather refused to entertain at all before took
firmer shape.
I was afraid that the squire really did mean something by this
very marked attention to his tenant's daughter. It must needs excite
a great deal of comment even among those who knew our rather
particular position in the village, and the unusual intimacy between
two families of different social standing. Would he have courted
that comment merely for the sake of gratifying his old friend?
What if he should propose to Joyce—if he should ask our parents'
consent to the marriage at once? Would Captain Forrester, the unknown
stranger, have any chance beside the friend of years? Would
the soldier, who had nothing but what he earned by his brave calling,
have a chance against the man who could give her as fine a
home as any in the county?
Not with mother; no, I felt not for an instant with mother. But
with father?
I knew very well that father, whatever his respect for the man,
would never see a marriage between the squire and his daughter
with pleasure, and I even thought it likely that he would downright
forbid it. But what would be his feelings with regard to the captain?
Would they be any different because, belonging by birth to another
class, he yet desired to work for the interest of the class that was
ours? I could not tell.
I was roused from my dream by the voice of Captain Forrester at
my side. He was asking me for a dance—this very next one.
There was something in the tone of his voice that puzzled me—a
harsh sound, as though something hurt him. Of course I gave him
the dance. I was only too delighted.
My feet had begun to itch as soon as I had heard the music, and
when I had seen Joyce sailing round, and no one had come to ask
me, I had felt very lonely. We stood up, even before the squire had
brought Joyce back to mother—we stood up, and with the first bars
of the new waltz we set forth. I soon forgot all thought of Joyce,
or any one else, in the pure joy of my own pleasure.
I did love dancing. I did not remember that it was Captain Forrester
with whom I was dancing, I only knew that it was a man
who held me firmly, and whose limbs moved with mine in an even
and dreamy rhythm as we glided across something that scarcely
seemed to be a floor, to the slow lilt of magic music. I was very
fond of dancing. I suppose Captain Forrester guessed it, for he
never paused once the whole dance through.
When we stopped, just pleasantly out of breath, as the last chords
died slowly away, he said, with his eyes on my face in that way that
I have described, "Why, Miss Maliphant, you are a heavenly dancer.
Where did you learn it?"
"I had six lessons at the academy in the town," answered I,
gravely; and I wondered why he burst out laughing, "but Joyce
gets out of breath sooner than I do, although she had twelve lessons."
The laughter faded out of his face as I mentioned Joyce's name.
"I don't mean to say that Joyce doesn't dance beautifully," I
added, hastily, "she dances better than I do, because she is so tall
and slight, but she does get out of breath before the end of a
waltz."
He did not make any remark upon this. He only said, "Shall
we go back to your mother?"
We got up and walked across the room. Miss Thorne was talking
to mother, and a clean-shaven, fresh-colored young officer was
inscribing his name on Joyce's programme.
Captain Forrester just shook hands with Joyce, and then he came
and sat down beside mother and began talking away to her in his
most excited fashion, telling her all about the waxing of the floor
and the hanging of the banners and the trimming of the evergreen
garlands, and how the gardener would put the Union Jack upside
down, until she was forced to be more gracious with him than was
her wont.
Joyce's sweet mouth had the look upon it that I knew well when
mother and she had had an uncomfortable passage, but I could not
imagine why she should wear it to-night. I could look across upon
her programme, and I could see that there were names written
nearly all the way down it, although I could not read whose names
they were, and especially after my one taste of the joy of waltzing,
I was beginning to think that no girl could have cause for sadness
who had a partner for every dance. Alas! I had but one, and my
spirits were beginning to sink very low. I had forgotten love affairs;
I wanted to waltz.
"There is a dreadful lack of gentlemen," said Jessie Hoad, who
had come up beside us, putting up her eye-glass and looking round
the room. "That unfortunate man must have his hands full."
"Do you mean Squire Broderick?" asked Miss Thorne. "I
don't think he considers himself unfortunate. He looked cheerful
enough just now, dancing with Miss Maliphant."
Miss Hoad vouchsafed no reply to this; she moved off to where
her father was talking to mine in a corner, and passing her arm
within his, walked him off without the slightest ceremony to be introduced
to the old lady with the handle to her name who had come
over from our fashionable seaport.
I thought it was very rude, but Mr. Hoad was not quite as affable
himself to-night as he was in the privacy of our own Grange
parlor.
"I hate that kind of thing," said Miss Thorne to me, in her out-spoken
way. "When are there ever men enough at a country
dance unless you get in the riffraff from behind the shop counters?
We come to meet our friends, not to whirl round with mere sticks."
I thought it was very nice of Miss Thorne, but I wished there
were just men enough to dance with me.
The music struck up again and Joyce went off with her partner.
I felt as though life indeed were altogether a disappointment; and
it did not give me any pleasure to hear Miss Thorne commenting
upon Joyce's beauty, nor laughing in her frank, good-natured way
about the squire's attentions, any the more than it amused me to hear
fragments of the gay descriptions with which Captain Forrester was
making the time pass for mother.
But, after all, I began to despair too soon; it was only the fourth
dance of the evening. Before it was over the squire came up to me.
"I have been so busy," said he, "I haven't been able to come before,
but I hope you haven't given all your dances away?"
Although I was new to the ways of the world, an instinct within
taught me to say, coolly, "Oh no, not all."
"What can you give me?" asked he. And he quoted three numbers
further on in the evening. "I think, being old friends, we
might dance three dances together," added he, with a smile.
"Oh yes," cried I. "I should like to dance them with you."
The squire was a beautiful dancer, although he was not a young
man; or rather, although he was not what I then considered a
young man. I fancied he did not smile at my enthusiastic reply.
He even looked rather grave. I was too simple to think of not giving
him my programme. I saw him glance at it and then at me.
From that moment I did not lack partners, and as far as the company
could provide them, good ones.
To be sure I jostled round the room with a raw youth or two,
and guided a puffing gentleman through the maze, and let my toes
be trodden upon by a tall gentleman with glasses on his nose, who
only turned round when he thought of it; but on the whole I enjoyed
myself, and it was all thanks to my host. I scarcely knew a
man when I went into the room, and certainly, save for that one
wild, delightful waltz, Captain Forrester had taken no account of
me, although he had sat close to me half the evening, and one
would have thought he would have noticed that I was not dancing.
But then, of course, he was preoccupied. I could not make him out
at all. All the evening I could not once catch him even talking to
Joyce, and I am quite sure that when I went in to supper he had
not asked her to dance once.
If I had been enjoying myself less I might have thought more of
it, but I was too happy to remember it until the breathing-time
came, when I went into the dining-room. Then, when I saw Captain
Forrester sitting in one of the best places with that horrid old Miss
Farnham, and Joyce at a side-table, with scarcely room to stand, and
no one but my pet aversion, Mr. Hoad, even to get her something to
eat, my blood boiled, and I could scarcely speak civilly to him.
And he seemed so interested too, so wrapped up in what the silly
creature was saying, with that nodding old topknot of hers! I was
thankful when he rose and took her outside to finish their discussion
about the poor-laws in the seclusion of some corner of the drawing-room.
I was very angry with him.
I looked suspiciously at the squire, who had taken mother in to
supper and sat at the head of the table with her. Mother was smiling
happily: she was proud of the honor that the squire was doing
to her and hers. But I could not look kindly at the squire. It was
infamous if, out of mere jealousy, he had tried to spoil two lives.
Instead of being proud that he had done my sister the honor of
opening the ball with her, instead of being grateful to him for his
kindness to me, and pleased to see all the attention that he was paying
to our mother amid the county magnates whom he might have
preferred, I was eaten up with this new idea, and felt my heart swell
within me as Joyce passed me presently with that calm and yet half-tired
look on her beautiful face.
Midnight was long past, and it was nearly time to go home. In
fact, father had said that it was time to go home long ago. He
had made a new friend in the young parson, and seemed to have
passed an hour happily with him, but the parson had left, and he
had exhausted every argument that he would consent to discuss with
the people whom he met in ordinary society and had been persuaded
by Mr. Hoad to speak a civil word on commonplace subjects to his
pet aversion Mr. Thorne, and now he was thoroughly sick of the
whole thing, and would have no more to do with it.
He came up to mother and begged her to come home, but mother
had heard the squire ask Joyce for another dance later on, and I
knew very well that she would not leave till that was through; besides,
she was the most unselfish old dear in the world, for all her
rough words sometimes, and would never have consented to deprive
us of an inch of pleasure that she could procure us.
Personally I was very grateful to her. I had a dance left with
the squire myself, and besides the pleasure of it, I had been arranging
something that I wanted to say to him. I was standing alone
in the entrance to the conservatory when he came to claim it. I was
looking for Joyce. I had missed her ever since supper. I had
thought—I had hoped—that she was with Captain Forrester, but
when Miss Thorne told me he was talking politics with Mr. Hoad in
the drawing-room, I believed her, and was at a loss to understand my
sister's absence. Could she be unwell? But I did not confide my
doubts to the squire. He put his arm around me and swept me off
onto that lovely floor, and I thought of nothing else.
I remember very clearly how well the squire looked that night—fresh
and merry, with bright keen eyes.
"That's a pretty frock, Miss Margaret," said he, as we were waltzing
round.
"Oh, I'm so glad you like it," answered I. "I was afraid it
wasn't suitable."
In the excitement of the ball I had entirely forgotten all about my
appearance, but now that the squire remarked upon it, I remembered
how uncomfortable I had felt in it at first.
"Why not suitable?" asked he.
"Mother bought it at the great Exhibition in '52," said I.
But the real cause of the awkwardness of my feeling had arisen
from the fact that I felt unlike myself in a "party frock," and not
at all from any fear that the frock might be old-fashioned.
"Oh! and Miss Hoad considers that an objection, I suppose,"
smiled he. "Well, I don't. There's only one thing I don't like,"
added he, in his most downright manner. "I don't like the trinkets.
You're too young for trinkets."
He had felt it. He had felt just what I had felt—that it was unsuitable
for a girl like me to be dressed up.
"You mean the corals," said I; and my voice sank a little, for I
was proud of the corals too, and pleased that mother should have
given them to me.
"Yes," he answered. "They are very pretty; but," he added,
gently, "a young girl's neck is so much prettier."
We waltzed round two turns without speaking. Then he said
abruptly, "Perhaps, by-the-way, I ought not to have said that, but I
think such old friends as we are may say anything to one another,
mayn't we?"
"Why, of course," said I, rather surprised.
The speech was not at all like one of the squire's. I had always
thought that he said just whatever he liked to any of us. But to be
sure, until the other evening, he had never spoken very much to me
at all.
I laughed—a little nervous laugh. I was stupidly nervous that
night with the squire. "I think we should be very silly if we
didn't say whatever came into our heads," said I. "I don't think
I like people who don't say what they think. Although, of course,
it is much more difficult for me to say things to you than for you
to say them to me."
"Why?" asked he.
"Well, of course, because you're so much older," answered I.
He was silent. For a moment the high spirits that I had so
specially noticed in him seemed to desert him.
"Well, what do you want to say to me that's disagreeable?" said
he presently, with a little laugh.
"Oh, nothing disagreeable," declared I. "It's about your nephew,
Captain Forrester."
"Oh!" said he.
His expression changed. It was as though I had not said what
he had expected me to say. But his brow clouded yet more, only
it was more with anger than sadness—the same look of anger that
he had worn the other afternoon. He certainly was a very hot-tempered
man.
"I don't think you are fair to him," said I, boldly.
He looked at me. He smiled a little.
"In what way not fair to him?" said he.
"Well, if it had been any one else but me," answered I, "and
you had said all that you did say the other day in the Grange parlor,
I think the person would have been set against Captain Forrester.
Of course it made no difference to me, because I like him
so much."
He winced, I fancied.
"You don't understand, my dear young lady," said he. "I merely
wished that there should be no misunderstandings."
"I don't think there were any misunderstandings," answered I.
"We always knew that Captain Forrester was not a man of property.
He told us so himself."
"Well, then, that's all right," said the squire.
"We liked him rather the better for it," concluded I, prompted
by a wicked spirit of mischief.
The squire did not reply to this. Of course there was nothing to
reply to it. It was a rude speech, and was better taken no notice
of. He merely put his arm round my waist again, and asked if we
should finish the waltz. I was sorry for my discourtesy before we
had done, and tried to make up for it.
Although the weather was still very treacherous in spite of the
clear sky, couples had strayed out through the conservatory onto
the broad terrace outside. I suggested to the squire that we should
do the same. He demurred at first, saying it was too cold; but as
I laughed at this, and ran outside without any covering over me, he
came after me—but he passed through the entrance-hall on his way
and fetched a cloak, which he wrapped round me. In spite of my
naughtiness, he had that care for the daughter of his old friends.
The moon was shining outside. It made dark shadows and white
lights upon the ivied walls and upon the slender gray pillars of the
ruined chapel; within, beneath the pointed arches, black patches lay
upon the grass, alternated with sharp contrasts of lights where the
moonbeams streamed in through the chancel windows.
The marsh was white where the silver rays caught the vapors that
floated over it, and dark beyond that brilliant path-way; there was a
track of light upon the sea. We stood a moment and looked. Even
to me it seemed strange to leave the brightness of within for this
weird, solemn brightness of the silent world without. I think I
sighed. I really was very sorry now for having made that speech.
We walked round the terrace outside the chapel. We scarcely
spoke five words. When we came to the wood that shades the
chapel on the farther side we stopped. The path that led into it
lost itself in blackness.
"It's quite a place for ghosts, isn't it?" said I.
"Yes; it's not the place for any one else," laughed the squire.
"Any one less used to dampness would certainly catch their death
of cold."
"Oh, you mustn't laugh at ghosts," answered I. "I believe in
ghosts. And I'm sure this wood must be full of ghosts—so many
wonderful people must have walked about in it hundreds of years
ago."
"So long ago as that?" said he.
He was determined to treat my fancy lightly. But his laugh was
kindly. We turned back to the white moonlight, but not before I
had noticed a tall, white figure in the black depths, which I should
have been quite sure was a ghost if I had not been equally sure of
the contrary. The figure was not alone. If it had been, I should
have accosted it. As it was, I took the squire's arm and walked
away quickly in the direction of the house. The music had struck
up again. The swing of an entrancing Strauss waltz came floating
out on the night wind.
"We must go in-doors," said the squire, not at all like a man who
was longing to dance to that lovely air; "I'm engaged for this to
Miss Thorne."
Poor man! No doubt he had had nearly enough by that time of
playing the host and of dancing every dance; he wanted a few minutes'
rest.
I too was engaged, but not to a very delightful partner. After
one turn round the room with him, I complained of the heat, and
begged him to take me outside. Of course we went towards the
ruin.
Of the few couples who had come out, all had gone that way, because
from that point there was a break in the belt of trees, and one
could see to the marsh and the sea. But we went round the chapel
to the wood on the other side.
"I say, it looks gloomy in there, doesn't it?" said the young man
at my side.
"Yes," answered I, but I was not looking into the wood now.
I had glanced into the interior of the ruin as we had passed, and
I had seen a tall black figure leaning up in the deep shadow against
the side of the central arch that stood up so quietly against the soft
sky. I felt quite sure that the "ghost," whom I had seen a few
minutes before, was close by. I was nearly certain that I saw a
white streak that was not moonlight beyond the bend of the arch.
I turned round and went down the lawn a few steps, my companion
following. He began to talk to me, but I did not know what he
said. I was listening beyond him to another voice. It fell sadly
upon my ear.
"I've no doubt the girl was right," it said. "I'm sure she was
right. I had never noticed it before, but his leading you out to-night
before every one was very significant."
It was my sister's voice that answered, but she must almost have
whispered the words, for I could not hear them at all.
The man spoke again.
"Yes; that's not very likely," answered he, with a soft laugh.
"Of course, how could he help it? Oh, I ought to have gone away,"
he added; "I ought to have gone away as soon as I had seen you.
But I couldn't. You see even to-night, when I have tried to keep
away from you, you have made me come to you at last. And I
didn't think that I was doing you any harm till now."
He emphasized the word "you." I did not notice it then, but I
recollect it now.
Again my sister's voice said something; what, I could not hear.
"Do you mean that, dearest? do you mean that?" said he, softly.
"That you would not marry him if you could help it, although he
would make such a lady of you? Ah, then I think I can guess something!"
A fiery blush rose to my cheek. I was glad that in the white
moonlight my companion could not see it. I ran quickly down the
slope of grass onto the gravel walk. It was dreadful, dreadful that
I should have listened to these words which were meant for her ear
alone.
"Come," I called to the lad, who loitered behind; "come, it's cold,
we must go in."
He followed me slowly.
"I believe there were a man and a girl spooning behind that wall,"
he said, with a grin.
How I hated him! I have never spoken to him from that day to
this, and yet, was it his fault?
We went back into the ball-room. The waltz was over. I had a
partner for the last one, but I did not care to dance it. I was watching
for Joyce, and when I saw her presently floating round with her
hand on Captain Forrester's arm, I thought I was quite happy.
But mother was not happy. She had thought that Joyce would
dance the last dance with Squire Broderick. She said that father
was tired, and that she wanted to go. And indeed his face looked
very weary, and his heavy lips heavier than ever.
No doubt we were all tired, for the squire too had lost the cheerful
look that he had worn all through the evening.
I sat and waited for Joyce, and I wondered to myself whether
any one would ever make love to me with his heart in his voice.