I only need to glance back over the page I
wrote last night to see how I felt. This conscripting
must have gotten under my skin a
little deeper than I thought. I’ll admit I was
homesick, and I guess it made me a little testy.
I think I really should tear that page out and
begin over. It isn’t exactly fair, and, besides,
it doesn’t fulfil the function of a diary, anyway,
which, I take it, is a record of events and things—not
a criticism of everybody in general and
an opportunity to give vent to disagreeable
feelings.
Never in my wildest flights of fancy can
I picture some of these men as soldiers
From a “close-up” view yesterday may have
seemed like a trying day, but to-night it looks
a lot different and a lot more interesting. I
must confess that all the “good-byes,” and the
bands, and the weeping mothers and sweethearts,
and the handshakes, and the pompous
old turtles (who dodged the draft in the Civil
War or bought substitutes) who slapped you
on the back and told you how they wished they
were young again, along with the arrival of
the “Kaiser Kanners,” who unquestionably
were “kanners” of another variety, and the
parade and the Home Guard and the dozen
and one “Comfort Kits” that every one handed
you, and the mystery of what was to come, and
the scared look on every one’s face, including
my own, and the vacant feeling in the pit of
one’s stomach, superinduced by sandwiches
and coffee, fudge, oranges and chocolates in
lieu of a real meal, did get on my nerves.
Every one of them had a fiendish grin on his face
But, hang it, when I look back we got a great
farewell, at that. And the local Board did
things up mighty well. I find myself possessed
of a razor, razor strop, wrist watch, two
pocket knives, unbreakable mirror, drinking
cup and a lot of other things that I never
expected to own or need. I haven’t the remotest
idea where many of them came from.
Then there was that long, almost never ending
train ride, which seemed to be taking me
on an unbearable distance from the place I
really felt I belonged.
And the arrival; all I saw when I tumbled off
the train were thousands of unpainted buildings
and millions of fellows in khaki, and every one
of them had a fiendish grin on his face as he
shouted: “Oh, you rookey. Wait, just wait;
you’ll get yours! When they bring on the
needle. Oh, the needle.”
I had a vague idea of what the “needle”
might be, but it wasn’t pleasant to hear about
it from every one I met. But I guess there
7
were a lot of fellows who were not quite
certain what this threatening “needle” was.
Foolishly two of them asked one of the Sergeants
who met us at the train and what they
heard in reply to their queries made them paler
than they were before, if that were possible.
Thereafter, for the rest of the afternoon and
evening, the “needle” was the subject of
earnest conversation among us all, and the
doubts and misgivings about that instrument
of torture, coupled with a thoroughly good case
of homesickness on the part of every one of us
helped to make a pleasant (?) evening. And
that most of us worried until far into the night
is certain. I know I did, and the Italian on
my left cried himself to sleep, and didn’t try
to hide his unhappiness either. Oh, it was a
delightful evening, all things considered.
Forty-seven of us, all from my own district,
came down together, and while we remained in
one group there was a measure of consolation
to be had for us all. But our hopes that we
would stay together at camp were dashed
immediately we got off the train. In fact we
were so thoroughly split up that I managed to
get into a squad composed entirely of foreigners, and
8
I’m still with them. But the
prospects of a change are excellent.
Quite as docile as sheep, and just as ignorant,
we were marched down one camp street
after another. My friends of foreign extraction,
with due regard for anything that looked
like a uniform, saluted every one that passed,
and they were tolerably busy until we were
halted outside of our present abode, a big two-story,
unpainted barracks building.
Here mess kits were served to each of us, and
though we did not know the combination that
unlocked the mysterious looking things, we
were glad to get them, because they added so
much to the dozen and one things we were
already carrying. Then, completely smothering
us, came two tremendous horse blankets
and a comforter. Those comforters were
everything their name implies. Not only did
they afford warmth, but amusement as well.
They ranged in shades from baby blue and
pink to cerise and lavender, and some one with
a sense of humour must have distributed them.
The stout, pudgy, black-haired Italian to my
left reposes under the voluminous folds of a
beautiful pink creation, and across the room
9
sits a huge Irishman, with hands as big as
hams and shoulders of a giant, with a baby
blue comforter wrapped about him. Mine is
a bewitching old rose. But, believe me, it’s
there with the quality if it isn’t much on looks.
I found that out last night.
Then, after the Sergeant showed us where we bunked and where we could
expect to find something to eat about supper time, every one left us
severely alone, which was mostly what we wanted, because we all had a
lot on our mind between homesickness and that blessed “needle.” But
there was some work to do, such as stuffing mattresses with hay,
sweeping out the barracks and similar occupations until bed time.
A baby blue comforter wrapped about him.
Some one, who had evidently heard some
weird tales about the punishment meted out to
10
those who overslept at camp, brought an alarm
clock along with him, and the blooming thing
went off at 4 A.M. Of course we got up,
switched the lights on over head, and proceeded
to get dressed with that resigned now-what-are-you-going-to-do-with-us
air.
But dressing was interrupted by a string of
the most beautiful cusses I ever heard, coming
downstairs just in advance of a mighty mad
looking Sergeant:
“Who in —— tarnation bow-wows has got
that —— alarm clock? Pitch it out the ——
window, and git back to bed.”
It went and we went. But that’s as far as
we could go. Thoughts of the “needle” and
other forms of torture which we were to face in
a few short hours kept most of us awake until
a quarter after five, when every officer in camp
began to blow letter-carrier whistles. Then we
all got up and were introduced to some physical
exercises guaranteed to stretch every muscle in
our makeup. I took a cold shower bath after
mine, and was the object of interest of the
entire barracks. Great stuff (I mean the
shower).
Most of us might have been tolerably happy
after that, if it hadn’t been for the fact that
every man in uniform made some evil suggestion
about the “needle.” And when they
saw us all, white and corpsey looking and more
or less unsteady on our legs, line up in front of
the barracks and march off under our Second
Lieutenant, the groans and sorry faces they
feigned were enough to make one’s blood run
cold. And then we got the “needle.”
An alarm clock went off at 4 A.M.
I, for one, was disappointed, and so were
most of the rest of us. But there were a few
who didn’t give themselves a chance to be disappointed.
They promptly fainted: not because
of the injection but because of the state
of their nerves which they all admitted afterward.
There were a few things about the
examination calculated to scare a man to death
such as the question: “In case you are shot
and killed to whom do you wish six months’
pay to be sent?” Many of us stammered a
bit before answering.
Jabbed at the iodine mark and pulled the trigger
After that we stripped, lined up and started
on our way. Then measured, marked and
finger-printed, we arrived before a physician
who stamped a quarter section under the left
shoulder blade with a sponge covered with
iodine, while another one scratched the skin on
our upper arm to mark the acreage to be covered
by a vaccination. We moved on to two
more physicians, and while one dug a hunk out
of our arm and inserted vaccine in place of the
skin removed, the other man, with a villainously
long hypodermic, jabbed at the iodine mark and
pulled the trigger. And now, by George, if
any one else around here tries to kid me into
worrying about anything at all, I’m going to
talk back proper. They sure had me scared
14
stiff and I’ll admit it. Why, hang it, I
would rather have had typhoid than face
that “needle” before I really knew what it
amounted to. But here I am, with germs
variously estimated at from 15,000 to 250,000
circulating around inside of me, due to said
“needle,” and aside from a little wooziness in
the head, and a sore shoulder, I’m quite contented
and ready to turn in. Good-night.