When Chrystal came to Edinburgh, he rooted
up the humors of the class-room as a dentist
draws teeth. Souls were sold for keys that
could be carried in the waistcoat pocket. Ambition
fell from heights, and lay with its eye
on a certificate. By night was a rush of ghosts,
shrieking for passes. Horse-play fled before
the Differential Calculus in spectacles.
I had Chrystal's first year, and recall the
gloomy student sitting before me who hacked
"All hope abandon, ye who enter here" into a
desk that may have confined Carlyle. It took
him a session, and he was digging his own
grave, for he never got through; but it was
something to hold by, something he felt sure
of. All else was spiders' webs in chalk.
Chrystal was a fine hare for the hounds who
could keep up with him. He started off the
first day with such a spurt that most of us were
left behind mopping our faces, and saying,
"Here's a fellow," which is what Mr. Stevenson
says Shakespeare would have remarked about
Mr. George Meredith. We never saw him
again. The men who were on speaking acquaintance
with his symbols revelled in him as students
love an enthusiast who is eager to lead
them into a world toward which they would
journey. He was a rare guide for them. The
bulk, however, lost him in labyrinths. They
could not but admire their brilliant professor;
but while their friend the medallist and he kept
the conversation to themselves, they felt like
eavesdroppers hearkening to a pair of lovers.
It is "beautiful," they cried, "but this is no
place for us; let us away."
A good many went, but their truancy stuck
in their throats like Otway's last roll. The
M.A. was before them. They had fancied it in
their hands, but it became shy as a maiden
from the day they learned Chrystal's heresy
that Euclid is not mathematics, but only some
riders in it. This snapped the cord that had
tied the blind man to his dog, and the M.A.
shot down the horizon. When Rutherford
delivered his first lecture in the chair of institutes
of medicine, boisterous students drowned
his voice, and he flung out of the room. At
the door he paused to say, "Gentleman, we
shall meet again at Philippi." A dire bomb
was this in the midst of them, warranted to go
off, none able to cast it overboard. We too had
our Philippi before us. Chrystal could not be
left to his own devices.
I had never a passion for knowing that when
circles or triangles attempt impossibilities it is
absurd; and x was an unknown quantity I was
ever content to walk round about. To admit
to Chrystal that we understood x was only a
way he had of leading you on to y and z. I
gave him his chance, however, by contributing
a paper of answers to his first weekly set of
exercises. When the hour for returning the
slips came round, I was there to accept fame—if
so it was to be—with modesty; and if it was
to be humiliation, still to smile. The professor
said there was one paper, with an owner's name
on it, which he could not read, and it was handed
along the class to be deciphered. My presentiment
that it was mine became a certainty when
it reached my hand; but I passed it on pleasantly,
and it returned to Chrystal, a Japhet
that never found its father. Feeling that the
powers were against me, I then retired from the
conflict, sanguine that the teaching of my mathematical
schoolmaster, the best that could be,
would pull me through. The Disowned may
be going the round of the class-room still.
The men who did not know when they were
beaten returned to their seats, and doggedly
took notes, their faces lengthening daily. Their
note-books reproduced exactly the hieroglyphics
of the blackboard, and, examined at
night, were as suggestive as the photographs of
persons one has never seen. To overtake Chrystal
after giving him a start was the presumption
that is an offshoot from despair. There
was once an elderly gentleman who for years
read the Times every day from the first page
to the last. For a fortnight he was ill of a
fever; but, on recovering, he began at the copy
of the Times where he had left off. He struggled
magnificently to make up on the Times,
but it was in vain. This is an allegory for the
way these students panted after Chrystal.
Some succumbed and joined the majority—literally;
for to mathematics they were dead.
I never hear of the old university now, nor
pass under the shadow of the walls one loves
when he is done with them, without seeing myself
as I was the day I matriculated, an awestruck
boy, passing and repassing the gates,
frightened to venture inside, breathing heavily
at sight of janitors, Scott and Carlyle in the air.
After that I see nothing fuller of color than
the meetings that were held outside Chrystal's
door. Adjoining it is a class-room so little
sought for that legend tells of its door once
showing the notice, "There will be no class
to-day, as the student is unwell." The crowd
round Chrystal's could have filled that room.
It was composed of students hearkening at the
door to see whether he was to call their part of
the roll to-day. If he did, they slunk in; if
not, the crowd melted into the streets, this refrain
in their ears:
"I'm plucked, I do admit;
I'm spun, my mother dear:
Yet do not grieve for that
Which happens every year.
I've waited very patiently,
I may have long to wait;
But you've another son, mother,
And he will graduate."
A professor of mathematics once brought a
rowdy student from the back benches to a seat
beside him, because: "First, you'll be near the
board; second, you'll be near me; and, third,
you'll be near the door." Chrystal soon discovered
that students could be too near the
door, and he took to calling the roll in the middle
of the hour, which insured an increased
attendance. It was a silent class, nothing
heard but the patter of pencils, rats scraping
for grain, of which there was abundance, but
not one digestion in a bench. To smuggle in a
novel up one's waistcoat was perilous, Chrystal's
spectacles doing their work. At a corner
of the platform sat the assistant, with a constable's
authority, but, not formed for swooping,
uneasy because he had legs, and where to put
them he knew not. He got through the hour
by shifting his position every five minutes; and,
sitting there waiting, he reminded one of the
boy who, on being told to remain so quietly
where he was that he could hear a pin drop,
held his breath a moment, then shouted, "Let
it drop!" An excellent fellow was this assistant,
who told us that one of his predecessors
had got three months.
A jest went as far in that class as a plum in
the midshipmen's pudding, and, you remember,
when the middies came on a plum they
gave three cheers. In the middle of some brilliant
reasoning, Chrystal would stop to add 4, 7,
and 11. Addition of this kind was the only
thing he could not do, and he looked to the
class for help—"20," they shouted, "24," "17,"
while he thought it over. These appeals to
their intelligence made them beam. They
woke up as a sleepy congregation shakes itself
into life when the minister says, "I remember
when I was a little boy——"
The daring spirits—say, those who were
going into their father's office, and so did not
look upon Chrystal as a door locked to their
advancement—sought to bring sunshine into
the room. Chrystal soon had the blind down
on that. I hear they have been at it recently,
with the usual result. To relieve the monotony,
a student at the end of bench ten dropped a marble,
which toppled slowly downward toward the
professor. At every step it took, there was a
smothered guffaw; but Chrystal, who was working
at the board, did not turn his head. When
the marble reached the floor, he said, still with
his back to the class, "Will the student at the
end of bench ten, who dropped that marble,
stand up?" All eyes dilated. He had counted
the falls of the marble from step to step. Mathematics
do not obscure the intellect.
Twenty per cent was a good percentage in
Chrystal's examinations; thirty sent you away
whistling. As the M.A. drew nigh, students
on their prospects might have been farmers discussing
the weather. Some put their faith in
the professor's goodness of heart, of which symptoms
had been showing. He would not, all at
once, "raise the standard"—hated phrase until
you are through, when you write to the papers
advocating it. Courage! was it not told of the
Glasgow Snell competition that one of the
competitors, as soon as he saw the first paper,
looked for his hat and the door; that he was
forbidden to withdraw until an hour had
elapsed, and that he then tackled the paper
and ultimately carried off the Snell? Of more
immediate interest, perhaps, was the story of
the quaking student, whose neighbor handed
him in pencil, beneath the desk, the answer to
several questions. It was in an M.A. exam.,
and the affrighted student found that he could
not read his neighbor's notes. Trusting to fortune,
he inclosed them with his own answers,
writing at the top, "No time to write these out
in ink, so inclose them in pencil." He got
through: no moral.
A condemned criminal wondering if he is to
get a reprieve will not feel the position novel
if he has loitered in a university quadrangle
waiting for the janitor to nail up the results of
a degree exam. A queer gathering we were,
awaiting the verdict of Chrystal. Some compressed
their lips, others were lively as fireworks
dipped in water; there were those who
rushed round and round the quadrangle; only
one went the length of saying that he did not
want to pass. H. I shall call him. I met him
the other day in Fleet Street, and he annoyed
me by asking at once if I remembered the landlady
I quarrelled with because she wore my
socks to church of a Sunday: we found her out
one wet forenoon. H. waited the issue with a
cigar in his mouth. He had purposely, he explained,
given in a bad paper. He could not
understand why men were so anxious to get
through. He had ten reasons for wishing to
be plucked. We let him talk. The janitor
appeared with the fateful paper, and we lashed
about him like waves round a lighthouse, all
but H., who strolled languidly to the board
to which the paper was being fastened. A
moment afterward I heard a shriek: "I'm
through! I'm through!" It was H. His cigar
was dashed aside, and he sped like an arrow
from the bow to the nearest telegraph office,
shouting "I'm through!" as he ran.
Those of us who had H.'s fortune now consider
Chrystal made to order for his chair, but
he has never, perhaps, had a proper appreciation
of the charming fellows who get ten per
cent.